House update - it was going to be a full on get things done day today but things changed. I had a doordash order from a pet store for a few things I needed, and they cancelled 1/3 of my items. So I cancelled it and just went to the store myself. Then when I came home a neighbor I have not seen in months came by and asked if our dogs could play. So we were in the yard letting them play for a half hour or so, which was nice. Then my dil and grandd showed up! I was very happy to see them because this week my ex is in town and I avoid him at all costs so I assumed I would not get to see grandd, since they would be doing things with him and his 'new family.' But dil would rather hang with me and came over here. We had a good visit and lunch for a few hours. Now she went home. So while I did not get my list of things done, I had a great day with them.

Before all of that happened, I got ALL the Christmas stuff put away into boxes and had my son put them back in storage. We took the tree out and vacuumed. Wow, so nice to see all the clear surfaces in the living room! And on my way to the store, I dropped off one box to donations. It was that box of my son's that was empty. I put a few Christmas items into it and though it was only 3/4 full I wanted it gone, so I dropped it off.

So a good day overall. If I get some energy, I might work on my room a little. But right now I need to make salsa.

hi Road! Merry Christmas! So nice to hear about your brother's progress. My goal setting this year is taking the form of habit trackers in my planner. If you google circle habit tracker you can see what I taped into my monthly planner and adding habits to track all month. I have a square one in each week for 5 more habits I can track. I am playing with it this week but once Jan 1 hits I will have it just right and be already started with my new habits. It is simple - like "walk" in one space and if I take a walk I can color in the square for that date. I do know fly lady and used it way back when, but I never could keep up with it. I do like her technique and that's where I got my habit to set a timer for 5 or 10 or 15 minutes and just work until it dings.

I hate when I don't sleep well Tatoulia. I hope you can rest well tonight.

SubC, covid is making everything more complicated, and miserable in some cases. I am dealing with event planning and not sure whether to plan or delay some events. Who knows what things will look like covid wise in a few weeks?

Hi all!

Hi Road! I'm sorry your brother's house is still overwhelming, but it is nice that he is making progress. And that you got to gather with family.

We have had a nice day together. I think it was good that we did not need to host a party tonight though. It has been a lot. Bean has gotten overwhelmed a couple of times (he took a nap during presents and finished opening his later).

And ddil got some bad news from her family. They are very divided over covid and many other things. Her sister went to see her father's new family, and they all have covid. Then her sister went to visit her mother's family. Then she told them about the covid. She is willing to get tested tomorrow. But it is early enough that she could be positive and not caught. Also if she is positive, other family members could be positive because she is already with them. Also ddil and ds were supposed to go tomorrow and only a less reliable rapid test would be fast enough to get results. And the sister is unvaccinated. So ddil says they are not going. And her mother is angry. And ddil is sad. The only silver lining is that we get more time with them, but I wish there was something we could do to make her feel better.

Good to hear from you, Road! You made it through Christmas! And I love your tagline. Very fun! I can hear Jimmy Stewart's voice!

Today is a holiday from work, which is pretty nice. They aren't giving us anytime for New Years other than a half day on Friday. But I'd rather the Friday before Christmas and the Monday after Christmas, anyway.

I met a friend from work today and we walked over six miles. Felt good.

It looks like winter today, which is nice. I'll get my garbage out soon.

Had a miserable night's sleep last night.

That's a pity re the smell of your brother's place. Is it from the dogs or just general bad smells?

I did check in on the fly lady many years ago. I couldn't relate. I didn't even wash my sink the way she likes people to. I haven't checked on any organization sites because organizing isn't my thing. I just want fewer things and have my house decorated nicely. That said, I am all in favor for whatever works! Whenever I see people with their stuff all organized and labeled I think, why do they have so much stuff that it needs to be labeled? BUT I am not creative. I don't have tools or fabrics or beads or embroidery flosses, etc. I'm terrible at all creative projects I start. I am not skilled and I am not precise. I wish I were. I do not have the gift of talent.

My house looks so beautiful today, and will look even nicer once I get my trash out. Will go clean kitty's box and take it out. It will be 5 PM by then plus the city isn't going to write a ticket for a few minutes early on a dark winter's night.

Ok people I am up to dec 23rd!

Lila, I am on board with goal-setting. Do you use a particular system or your own process? I'm gonna dip my toe back into vision boarding. Basic concept is writing goals in all-positive verbiage and in the present tense as if you've already achieved it. And then incorporating a lot of visuals... it can be a bit of a process but in the past when I've committed to it I've found the level of detail and visual aspect really helpful. Might be in too negative of a mindset to do affirmations at this point but maybe I can get back there...

Do I remember correctly that some of you are familiar with fly lady techniques? And what about the "organized Christmas" Program - wow to think I used to attempt that! Prob wouldn't be so hard without a boarded house. Lol.

Back agaiN later,

hi again people and merry Christmas, you old building and loan!

I just noticed the formatting window there after what, 6 months? Lol

That's my holiday greeting this year, you old building and loan. I'm completely sober, just weird.

Lila, I am still back on December 22nd (reading through) but I am identifying with what you're writing.

Sorry to miss out on all the discussions. I have been thinking of you all and as usual just kind of drowning or treading water in a very belated pre Christmas haze... very mindful of the need to tackle the post-Christmas "we shoved things in corners, bags and boxes (and ovens) at the last minute aNd now it's time to put everything away where it goes or next year we won't be able to find anything either" syndrome.

But for today, we are prepping for the last family thing and then there will be more time to clean. Christmas Eve we went to my brothers. You all need to appreciate how significant this is that he invited us (including the aged Ps) to his house for Christmas Eve. I was hoping he would have done a little more since I worked on things with him last week and he had. More surfaces were cleaned and dusted and he covered the dog ravaged couches. The odor was still fantastic. When my dad who uses a cane /walker and is having extra hip pain at the moment tried to step over the threshold he kind of leaned backwards and I honestly think it was from the smell. But anyway, we all came in and sat and had a nice visit for an hour or two. Bro served us pop and popcorn. I kind of chuckled watching him have to handle the little extra duties of hosting. We are all middle aged babies but he's definitely a fish out of water with having people over. And I know he was embarrassed so that wasn't fun but it was a good reminder for him how much work it is for us when he comes over and doesn't do anything. I'm delving into negativity. He crossed a major threshold and I'm proud of him. I'm gonna keep checking in with him although I don't think I'll try to "help" him again unless it's side by side in separate rooms. He's got a couple weeks to address the odor and if he doesn't I'm going to have to say something to him. Other than that I will just keep engaging him on what I'm doing and try to get him to share what he's doing cause I know that's motivating for him.

Christmas morning we were here and my son opened his presents. He was not impressed or excited by anything. Parenting fail. Ugggh. He stacked all his stuff up neatly on a chair and hasn't looked at it since. He's kind of at an in between stage... and he's kind of "off" right now which terrifies me. There's also the fact that he's an only child and has everything he wants already... ☺️

Omg my son just brought up a bottle of pop and a glass for me. Sweetest😇 Angel With the worst gas ever. 🥴 🥰

Christmas afternoon we went to my Ps for lunch. Their dining room is still closed to guests so they have it where you can get stuff to go so they just pick it up and bring it back to the apartment and we plate it up. It was the first Christmas there and I think they were ok with it. Last night we visited with the H's mom. They're usually estranged so I've never been to her apartment. She moved out of her house a couple years ago. It's a low income retirement place and it was well maintained and clean but extremely basic - like no garbage disposal or dishwasher. She was the most pleasant and calmest I've seen her for a long time. It was still a little awkward but fairly pleasant couple of hours.

Right now in the frame of mind I'm in (clearing out my house) every gift I see for me or for others looks like a challenge - like I'm introducing extra obstacles and more decisions about how to turn around and get rid of it! Definitely a shift in thinking so I will take it. I did finally give up on finding my stash of winter clothes and bought two new shirts at target - only one of which was on clearance which is very rare for me haha . I also bought some stuff from two thrift stores a few weeks ago. I was trying to find a shadow box for the H to make a memorial one for his brother. They had this one that was pretty deep and had a very nice wood frame. It had all this cool nautical stuff in it so I was gonna remove all of that and put stuff in for his brother and it was only $24. I couldn't find anything half that nice for half that price, but in the end I decided it wasn't quite deep enough and probably too large overall so I didn't get it. But then I found other treasures. Not too much $$ and not too much volume, but it reminded me of how I got in this mess to begin with. Schemes of creative projects that would actually happen way too infrequently, and just the volume of several grocery bags a week coming into the house and almost nothing going out. Times several years and you have 400 bins of crap in your house. Anyway, I think I can avoid doing that again for awhile now.

Off to play with the puppy. Be back in a bit.

Hi Road!

Hi all, just checking in... will pop back in later...

Thanks for the clarification on the party. It is so sad to see this precious time pass with the children. Very painful and lonely 2 years.

I have been trying to sleep for a while with no luck whatsoever.

I need to buy more pledge. You keep reminding me of that, Lila.

I did three loads of laundry today. Two after I woke up and one tonight.

I wish I could fall asleep.

Thanks Tatoulia!

SubC I really like that idea. It seems like attacking the piles from the "opposite end," looking for favorites rather than things to toss, will help me. I will do that tomorrow... just start putting things I love in those empty drawers and the closet spot. We'll see what is left. Have a Merry Christmas tomorrow!

I worked on my planner for about an hour and it is all organized. I re-structured my habit trackers a little (I did a trial run for the last bit of December before putting it into January) and I think I like it now. I also moved all of my tasks into new lists for this week, separated into work and home. Since I don't have to GO to work this week, I can just do the listed tasks from home and get caught up. And the rest of my time can be spent enjoying some alone time and getting caught up on things here. Although I just remembered that I forgot to do my laundry. It's late but I am going to put it in right now.

Hi Lila, all of the help was my real present.

I have mininubian goats, they are a cross between Nubians and Nigerians. Medium sized, and sometimes they have floppy ears like the Nubians, and sometimes "half drop" or "airplane" ears that stick out to the sides.

My kids are all here. We had a really nice dinner and a fun evening. The dishwasher is running and there is very little mess. Gifts are under the tree for tomorrow.

I use a wool duster or the soft brush vacuum attachment for books. I use a feather duster for very fragile or detailed things, but I think it mostly knocks the dust off rather that collecting it. (I vacuum the wool duster to clean it) I do not use product, but sometimes I use a barely damp cloth.

I think that you should start by putting your very favorite things nicely in your empty drawers. You may be surprised and find some things you can part with while trying to select your favorites.

Tatoulia, the party is just the two families. It is a long running beloved annual tradition. But for the second year in a row, there will be no party. Most of my friends' kids have never seen my grandson. Their oldest granddaughter has gone from three to five. She probably doesn't remember the last party. This is why I am sad.

You are doing great, Lila.

I'm working on a donation bag right now. A thing here, a thing there.

Tatoulia, those are very thoughtful gifts. I love things like that. I want to start planning ahead for gifts for people so they can be special and not expensive.

Yeah I guess they do fluff up. Also I remembered I have several empty drawers in my dressers now since I decluttered. I really could put some things in there. Especially the clothes. I went back in a third time to try and fill a donate box that is half full, but only could find a couple of small tins. Then I looked around at all the piles and thought, I cannot image anything in here that I want to donate. I think there is nothing left to donate or get rid of. That makes me stressed. But, I am sharing it here because someday, I will take another box full out of there and I want to remember how I thought there was nothing left I could donate. I think I need all of it. But I also think that will change and my grip on those things will "loosen up" over time.

Next time I go in my room, instead of focusing on getting rid of things, I will focus on finding a place for everything. In those drawers, or maybe in the closet where my son's box used to be. If I can put things away and consolidate, that will make more space.

Hello, hello.

I understand on wanting a thoughtful gift, Lila. I don't know if I told you about what I used to do with friends and co-workers. We didn't have to exchange gifts, but if we did, they needed to be $10 or less. The full $10 need not be spent. So I used to look around all year for what to get someone. Once, one of my favorite hand embroidery places (thinking of you, Road), had a sale and I was able to get hand embroidered tea towels and guest towels for the $10. I knew I had one friend who would enjoy that, so I got her one of the sale ones and held it til Christmas. One year everyone got a wood Christmas tree from OneManOneGarage. At the time I think they were $8. So that type of thing. I was very proud of what I could get that would fit the bill and still give some thought. Ditto he Swedish sponges for eco-conscious friends. I buy from Etsy and not amazon. So things like that.

My friend Emiko got us very thoughtful gifts. She designed wine labels with a picture of BF's cat and made it look like the cat had been the vintner. It looked really professional on the wine bottles. Since I don't drink, she made labels for my cat and put on San Pellegrino bottles. Enormously thoughtful.

I don't dust my books. My cleaners use a feather duster on the books. No idea if it works.

The idea of no spend January is you still can buy groceries and supplies. But because you have a strong cache of gift cards, you may be able to make it a true no spend month. I used to buy all sorts of stuff on sale in January. I would wait til nearly February and then buy all of the Christmas wrapping paper at 90% off. Now with the changes in the world, I don't expect any of the wrapping papers to fall under 50% but again, I am not buying any. I didn't last year or the year before. All of the stores were out of tissue paper the week before Christmas so I won't try to get any. I had bought a big pack earlier in the season and did not use it all. I did stop buying all the sale stuff as part of my hoarding recovery. I also stopped buying multiples of sale stuff. I used to buy so much stuff and then have to sit around and think of who to give it to. Insanity. How about not doing that and saving all the money.

The stuff fluffs up, Lila. You could get rid of 40 boxes and it will still fluff up. Because we have so much stuff that it becomes compacted. Because we have so much stuff that our eyes didn't see it. Now your eyes are starting to see it. This is progress. This is what progress looks like.

Oh dear, SubC, that is a large reduction of party goers. I am sorry that makes you sad. I just told BF that our NYE plans have been downgraded to an early dinner of Thai food. Our usual restaurant isn't doing take-out this year. They did it last year due to the pandemic. They will still be open this year but we will not go. So we will have an early meal. Last year we stayed up, has the fancy meal here, etc., but I don't see the point this year.

I'm glad the goats can't read! Plus their sensitivities may be a bit different so they can laugh at the shirt.

post 3 and a question -

I do not actually have any dusting spray I can find, but I do have pledge wipes. So I went back in and wiped off my headboard (super dusty) and a very dusty dresser which only had a few items on top, which I dusted.

Question: Is there a duster you guys like for dusting things like bookshelves? Mine were bad because I didn't dust for over a year so I had to take every book off and use compressed air. But if I want to use a duster to keep it from getting that bad, what works well to catch the dust on such irregular surfaces like books, or stuff on a shelf of a tv stand? I am looking on amazon at micrifiber dusters, lambswool, feather, etc. I prefer a longish handle.

post 2 -

I went into my bedroom to try and do a little today. I cleaned off one night stand top. It was super dusty with junk all over it. I threw out a few things and moved other things, dusted the nightstand and what is left on it (clock, small lamp, and one little wooden box). Now it looks much better. I also dusted the windowsill behind it, but ran out of spray duster so I will go over it again with a new can (I know I have one in the closet). I need to clean the window glass as well and clean out the window track.

It is a small thing but it is something. My bedroom is once again difficult to walk through. Hard to get to a closet or window. Things piled everywhere. Again I cannot fathom how I have taken at least 4 loads to donate and multiple bags to throw out, plus sold those 2 large items - and yet, it multiplies in there in a way I don't understand. Again there are piles on the rocking chair, and all over the floor. Yet while I was in there I could not "see" one thing I wanted to donate. I will keep trying.

Tatoulia, I am fine with small gifts, but I do wish sometimes I would get something more personal but I really don't need anything. I like it when it is obvious a person really put some thought into what would make me smile. Wow, that is great you are a cleanup pro at christmas! I am always the one with a mess left in the kitchen, wrapping paper and boxes everywhere, and dishes left for a day or two. I hope to form a new habit.

I am excited to see your No Spend January (and no processed sugar although that sounds harder to me). I have had "spend nothing January" in my head for weeks, and I even started playing with having a page in my planner where I write down every cent I spend and keep it to the bare minimum, like gas. I can go to the food bank and use a grocery card my church gave me, and STOP IT with the fast food habit (again today).

WOW SubC, that is the most productive Christmas I have ever heard of, lol. We are lazy around here on Christmas generally speaking. So nice you have help to get things done. So sorry about no party tomorrow though. I hope their covid symptoms are mild. LOL @ goats can't read. We had 3 goats a long time ago. I really love the little pygmy goats! What kinds do you have?

Tatoulia, I think that's a great goal - just be sure to leave yourself a little flexibility so you don't feel like you have already failed the whole month if you allow yourself a small treat or a reasonable purchase midway.

Our friends just called and cancelled the party tomorrow night because their granddaughter was exposed to covid. A second of their adult kid's family is also quarantined because of exposure between the two sibling families, and our friends have gone on complete lockdown with a third adult child because the wife will be caring for that child after she has surgery in a week. The husband will be coming over for dinner alone on Tuesday after his wife leaves with the kids to drive back to their home out of state.

So I have a lot less to do, but I am sad.

If the shirt is comfortable, I will wear it for barn work and blackberry picking and turn one of my work shirts into cleaning rags - they have rust stains and blood stains and grass stains and berry stains and places they caught on a fence or thorn and tore or were chewed by a goat. Goats can't read.

If it isn't comfortable, I will donate it.

SubC what an amazing Christmas and it's still going on! Wow!

Can you wear the slightly rude tshirt inside out when you wear it? I ask this because one thing I have learned from decluttering is that anything that causes me stress must go, I had here little candles from my sister that I kept for years and years but they caused me stress. So I finally donated them. Ditto with a lamp in my house. So either wear it inside our or turn into a rag that you can use. Or donate as-is. ??Twas merely a $3 t-shirt with humor not meant for everyone.

I was up til 4 this AM. Hence my first choice of coffee at 12:30 PM.

Going to enjoy a No Spend and No Processed Sugar January. Decluttering by not buying; decluttering my waistline and my energy levels by not eating sweets. Your thoughts?

Good morning

Happy Boxing Day!

Tatoulia your Christmas sounded lovely!

Thank you to everyone who shared their earth friendly wrapping ideas with me. ❤️ And Lila, I think your gifts sound lovely and sensible! I might have too much for Bean tomorrow I have one brand new toy, three used books, a new cat cup, a used toy, and a stack of laminated animal pictures I saved from teacher files I purged this month. I may spread things out on more days.

I do have a paper bag of used wrapping paper from gifts my mil sent. My kids are going to use it for some craft projects planned at school. My gifts were astonishingly good - grow lights that I had asked for and forgotten, and a really pretty surprise necklace with a picture of a goat that looks just like my first and much loved herd queen.

We opened our gifts from Bean's family. I was gifted two "humorous" t-shirts that Dd was quick to say were bought on clearance for about $3 each. One I like and the other is rude and I will only wear it when I am doing some type of work at home that might wreck my clothes. Bean's family also finished the rock circle around my herb garden and mulched it, and took down a section of fence for me. Bean helped me lay out some plastic in the garden to solarize beds for spring. It was a really warm day for December!

Dd2 decided she had had enough if her friend's family and showed up late in the afternoon. Bean's family decided to stay over again, so we had dinner and watched a movie after Bean went to bed. This morning everybody stayed until about 10:30, then Bean dragged his parents off to see other Grammy, and dd2 is helping me with some of the stuff that didn't get done because I was still enjoying company last night and this morning. By 6 I should have my whole crew back, including ds and ddil and the doggies.

Lila those sound like lovely gifts. Are you okay with small gifts? I can generally go either way.

Cm good to hear from you! I find the holidays to generally be nice. Years ago they used to take more out of me, esp when I had to do my own cleaning. I miss smoking a lot on Christmas. I used to allow myself a pack of cigarettes on Christmas Eve and I'd smoke while getting ready. So long ago!

Lila I need dishes done and wrappings in the bin immediately. Have always been this person. I start running the dishwasher while people are still here then run a second when I go to bed. This year, my friend did all the dishes and I didn't use a lot that required hand washing, although she washed those too. I love gathering up the garbage after Christmas. Here, my garbage day will be Monday night/Tuesday AM. My last one was Thursday night/Friday AM so no lingering garbage in the house during Christmas Eve.

I will leave decorations out and up til NY Eve. The wreaths on my are usually removed right after the New Year unless we get some pretty and picturesque snow; in which case, I leave them up a bit longer.

So nice to hear your updates! So do you guys have a lot of cleaning or putting things away from the holidays or is it now relief time?

I am working in the morning for a few hours and then I think I can relax. I am fairly sure I don't have to work the rest of this week. Maybe a few home things but no events, nothing pressing, although several people have asked me to get together this week. If I do, I generally try to put them all in one day (meet someone for brunch, someone for coffee, maybe an early dinner and another for coffee - I prefer this rather than spreading them over the whole week when I am not working. I need days where I don't have to get ready or see anyone. So if I have a meetup with a friend I put it on a work day.

I did really well at cleaning up as I went today - washing cookie sheets after baking, putting things away, tossing trash. Now the house is in pretty good order and my kitchen is cleaner than it was when I started this morning! I did not get much for Christmas - just consumables (a few candies, some coffee, that's all) so no clutter. In the next day or two I will be going through the last 2 Christmas bins in the house to see if anything can be donated, and I'll be putting away all the Christmas decor and putting the tree out. I promised the kids I would make some toffee and some potato cheese soup and bread.

My bedroom is super bad so I will work on that this week too.

MERRY CHRISTMAS 🎅 🎄

Time has been weird today. Didn't mean to be this late. Hope everyone had a good one.

It's interesting the different perceptions people have of holidays depending upon whether it's a break from a routine that has become stressful and drudgery, or a thing that sounds great but is a change from the familiar and requires preparation which feels taxing. My roommate is in the former category, and I am in the latter.

But overall we had a nice day.

Lila, what a lovely Christmas! Great idea on the gifts! And the reusable bags are always a hit!

I gave mom only things she needed for Christmas (and/or could use). White percale sheets, new cotton lawn nightgown, bathrobe, wipeable place mats. I also got her a cute lipstick sampler from Clinique. I don't know why she wants makeup but it was cute and packaged nicely. A few candies and hand lotions. Easy enough.

BF brought a pie for the workers and I tipped everyone. There's a stack of envelopes for the other workers as they filter in during the week.

I brought my jam box speaker and streamed Christmas chorale music and at one point mom cried because she was missing her mother. Mom enjoyed the lasagne and the cake with peppermint ice cream I brought her. I came home and showered and just woke up from my nap.

I had lasagne once I came home and I have to admit, it came out pretty well. I left a second piece at mom's for her and also brought her Lebanese food.

So that's my Christmas. BF gave me a new kindle and cover. My old one (2d generation) was, as of October of this year, no longer going to be supported and I would no longer be able to download new books to it. I have the kindle app on my iPad but honestly, I won't be carrying around my heavy iPad every time I want to read (waiting at dr's office, sitting around during other errands, etc) so I was very happy. This is what stopped the book madness for me. I would buy so many books and I couldn't get rid of them. So the kindle has been a lifesaver. Space saver. Same difference.

Marry Christmas everyone!

Tatoulia, that is a good idea. I have unfinished projects all over the place. I'll try that. Also, my DIL who was here today mentioned lasagne too so now I am craving it! Maybe I'll make one tomorrow. We are having a ham dinner today.

One of my kids did not come to Christmas because he ahs to work and he slept in. I can't remember having Christmas without him. I was sad at first but then thought, hey, this is part of kids growing up and life. He will come get his gifts another day and we can visit then. But my other son came over with his wife and grandd and that was so fun! Watching a little one open gifts is such joy! We also made more cookies together.

Things I did that helped my declutter goal:
Although I have little money, I used to buy 10 or 12 presents per kid, on a credit card. This year I told them ahead it will be a simpler Christmas. I restrained myself and bought ONE gift for grandd that I knew she was love (and she did!). Instead of buying more gifts, I got out a very cool toy set that my kids used to play with and I saved. She and her daddy had a blast playing with that! It cost me nothing but was a very happy thing.

I also went into my very stuffed master bathroom cabinets and found a nice, new body wash someone gifted to me recently and some really nice foot conditioning cream that I never use, and put them together with a loofah and gave it to my DIL. She really liked it and now I have less things!

I too did not buy any wrapping paper or cards. I found cards in the Xmas tubs (and only sent a few). I used the wrapping paper we already had, and also reusable bags. Now that paper/plastic bags cost 8 cents each at stores here, I've found people really appreciate gifts being given in nice, reusable decorative bags. They are a sturdy plastic and have cute patterns on them and are handy for grocery shopping.

We had breakfast, opened presents, played, and baked 3 kinds of cookies this morning. At 1 it was evident grandd needed a nap so their family went home for a bit as they live right by me. Now I am enjoying the coffee they gave me. They'll be back later for dinner. I need to get it cooking soon.

I am glad I am getting a few hours of alone time today. I need it!

Merry Christmas!

Btw it should have said I plated the food in the kitchen. I wore disposable gloves.

Now I need to make mom's lasagne. A bit gloomy here.

Lila I am working on making an improvement each time I leave a room. So when I go to the kitchen, I'll first see if there's anything here to go to the kitchen. I'm also working on completing a task. I don't want to start something then leave it for later to finish. Nothing to be gained by that. So now when I start, I think "complete," as a gentle command to myself.

SubC each and every gift was in white tissue paper or a reusable bag. Everything looked really nice here. Thank you so much I will not buy wrapping paper again. I wish the tissue came in larger sheets, but I made it work.

Thank you SubC, yes it was enough. That sacrifice paddock is really interesting. I get it. I need to think about how to use that method in my life - maybe not just in the home/decluttering area. My life is in danger of trampling and I need to minimize the damaged areas. Also - good job on the goal.

Tatoulia, that sounds lovely!! I would love to come to a Christmas like that. What a blessing to your guests.

I got the presents all wrapped and went to volunteer and enjoyed it. I decided I could wash up and put some light conditioning spray in my hair and just go. I'm glad I did that. I came home and there was another present in the mail so I need to wrap it, and move all the presents to the tree. They are on the kitchen table so that the animals don't open them, lol. But the pets won't be near the tree at night so I can safely put them under the tree at bedtime.

I am so glad I can stay home tomorrow (Christmas). We will open presents, have breakfast (I have to prep tonight), and there will be Christmas dinner.

Merry Christmas, everyone!

We had a beautiful Christmas Eve. We picked up the food, dropped off gifts for BF's neighbors. Then he did his thing while I came back here. I decided to set up three different eating places. My friend ate at my desk by the fireplace, BF sat on the couch and ate off the coffee table, and I ate on the other couch by the side table. I put Christmas placemats (vintage 1980's from Williams Sonoma) on everyone's place and folded the napkins, etc, and told them to pick where they want to sit. So we were all apart by at least six feet and we wore our masks when not eating. House looked very clean and very nice. The uniformity of the placemats helped. Emiko offered to stay at home and I told everyone to make up their own minds and we were here and felt very safe. I played the food in the kitchen and it was a lovely, warm evening. My friend did all the cleanup. She's so quiet about it. I was very happy with how it went. We drove her home afterward and now I'm ready for bed.
Lila, you and your son are very good people. I'm glad you found the dog.
SubC what a lovely quote for CM. I love that your grandson was playing with the ornaments. Such magic!

Merry Christmas SubC, Lila, CM, Tess, Road, Cory, Tillie, Anony, LR, Joan, Diane, Dianne and everyone else.

CM,

I read this and it made me think of you:

"Christmas is the grand miracle that makes space for all the smaller miracles. It gives us enough hope to walk a little farther in the dark toward the glimmer of something that seems too distant to reach."

Keep walking.❤️

I finished decorating the Christmas tree!

Bean enjoyed playing with the things I put deliberately on the low branches for him. It looks nice. The cookies came out well.

I found three ornaments I can part with. My mom gave us two, and my students gave me none this year, so tgat is a net minus one. Enough. Better is enough.

Lila, I hope you got your presents wrapped and are enjoying your volunteering. That is enough, ok? If you do any of the rest - it is bonus.

Tatoulia, you need to do what you are comfortable doing. I know things feel overwhelming and unending, but just take it one day at a time. This too shall pass.

I told my Dh that my goal for next year - and this is literally my one big goal, because so much else goes into it - is to not have to spend a whole day next year cleaning up the first floor before Thanksgiving and to keep it like that through New Years. I spent a whole day not finishing cleaning up one room. So that would be huge. It will require slow and steady progress because things are grab and stashed and because the first floor is not going to be fully cleaned up this year - and I have decided to be ok with that.

I have almost 11 months to finish the job.

There is a concept in grazing management called the "sacrifice paddock" when your pasture won't support your stock - because of heavy rains, or drought, or some other temporary situation, rather than use the pastures and degrade them, you fence off the minimum area your stock needs for space, and you let them destroy it. You hay feed and/or boost their grain, and you clean frequently or use deep bedding, and the whole thing becomes a compost pile on top of compacted ground - it takes years to recover, but if you do it right, the rest of your pasture improves and you can go back to rotational grazing and let the sacrifice paddock heal. Sometimes you need to reduce your stock.

So, my basement and my animal barn are my "sacrifice paddocks" I am resolved to use them as I have to to keep the other areas in good shape, and slowly clear them out when I can, but the other parts of my house and the studio barn are going to recover and improve and not have one more thing added that isn't progress.

That's my one big resolution for next year.

omg things are not going as planned. I got a few gifts wrapped but some have not arrived yet. Looked out the window and saw my neighbor's dog out there loose so told my son, who the dog likes. Son went out and dog took off! We live in the city. I went to neighbor and the poor old grandma was there alone, no car, and in a panic about the dog. So we drove around, then went home, then my son and I walked around everywhere looking. Saw dog being chased by really big dog! Eventually my son caught the dog and brought him back home. But now I have a headache, my feet hurt and I am tired.

I'm going to take some aleve and drink water, sit a bit and then... ugh that ate up all my time. I only have an hour and a half. I need to go look in the mirror and decide if I really have to shower and dye my hair or can just wash up and be ok. I am clean but my hair gets wild sometimes. Guess I will try and finish wrapping too.

Merry Christmas Eve, Tatoulia. It will all work out. Like you said, no need to worry. Tonight is hopefully a night of peace and hope.

I went and ran my errands, have my coffee here. I have to work tonight (volunteer) for about 4 hours. It should be fun. It's good for me to have commitments like this or I would just isolate myself all the time.

I really wish my 2 kids who live at home would get up. They are sleeping too long. I would like to send them with their dad to finish their shopping, and have them help me with baking. Oh well, they are late teen and 20s and have medical and mental health stuff going on so it is not in my control.

I need to wrap all the rest of the presents. Maybe bake some of the cookies and make toffee. Clean up a bit, especially the kitchen. Decide if I am going to dye my hair before I shower. I have to leave in 5 hours.

On my goals: I set up a goal tracker for December just as a trial run and to get myself prepped for January. I figure if I can start on some of the habits now it will make January easier. So today I am working on drinking enough water (2c so far, going for #3 now). Last night I flossed. Last night and this morning I worked on learning Spanish. And today when I went out to run errands I picked up a few branches in my yard, broke them up and stuck them in the garbage can. Yardwork is on my habit tracker so I can check that off. Even if I do one little thing for my yard it counts.

How are you all doing this Christmas Eve?

Quick check in. I woke up at 11. I was supposed to wake up at 8. Wanted to get house ready before leaving to pick up the food. Cannot be done. So I'm letting go. I will do what I can and then not worry. I'll leave my alarm off so if my friend decides to leave work early, she can come in and she'll start working on the house.

I'm not worried. I'm worried about Covid and BF may decide not to come tonight. I respect whatever he chooses. I am good with all safety choices. I told him we will work it out when in the car. That there's no decision that I will disagree with.

Good morning! So glad to see posts today :) I don't mind posting alone sometimes because I know people will come and read them later and we will chat.

Tatoulia, it sounds like you needed the rest to be productive. Good job on the laundry! I rarely can do 3 loads... lol. I do one or two and get distracted. I am not done wrapping either.

SubC, I LOVE your idea of quarters or 6-8 week goals! I don't know why I was sitting here trying to plan the whole year and getting this uncertain feeling. Doing shorter term but extendable goals makes so much sense. I think it's fine to make big yeary goals like the weight etc, but I can also just plan the next month or two in my planner and adjust the following quarter goals if need be. Thanks for that. I will work on it more today. When I get really focused on goals I even get ouot stickers and colored markers and make my planner a nice, fun place to mark off my progress. Otherwise it just becomes a massive to do list. I am happy working on goals and habit trackers right now. I hope you will find a good time to do your reflection traditions. It sounds like a mentally healthy habit.

I'm glad you can work out the split celebration/dates with family. I have had to do that too sometimes because yep, the grands have a whole other side of their family. You have a few extra days to prep! Maybe that's a bit of a blessing.

Okay my dog is whining so I better let him out. I need to go out this morning to get dog food and pick up my prescriptions. I might indulge in a coffee while I am out because one of my goals for the new year is to track unnecessary spending and get a grip on it. I tend to get fast food several times a week and I realize I cannot continue wasting that amount of money (or eating that stuff). Then I need to come home and wrap the rest of the gifts, clean (omg the kitchen is a wreck) and was thinking of dying my hair but I dunno if I have the energy.

Good morning!

Lila, I'm sorry we left you talking to yourself all day!

I'm glad that you got to enjoy the fruits of your labors and that you got some alone time!

Yay for progress on the books! You are doing so well! The box was a huge thing. If you had done nothing but the box, it would still be impressive!

I think the secret to tidying up is having places for all the things. Still getting there..

I will be wrapping presents on Boxing Day - lol! Bean and his family are coming by early this afternoon to bake cookies and then heading on to dsil's favorite uncle for his traditional Christmas Eve party with his paternal family. Unfortunately they had to split it into two households this year. Bean will be attending the "symptom free, fully vaxxed and boosted" location.

They come back here to sleep, but tomorrow we are just FaceTiming Dh parents and opening the gifts they sent for Bean's family and me. Then they are going home to sleep, seeing other Grammy on the 26, and coming back with my whole crew in the evening and we will have our big gift/food/party events on the 27th. So while everyone else is recovering from "Christmas" I will be preparing.

Tatoulia, you got a lot done. And I still don't believe your house is a pigsty. 😘

Goals - Lila, your goals and plans sound good, but they are very big! Don't get overwhelmed or discouraged.

I find a lot of meaning in the natural rhythm of the seasons and usually mark the points of the year. Traditionally winter solstice is a time of reflection and letting go of items, thoughts, attitudes, habits and roles that have not served me well. I usually have a fire and spend some time in journaling and meditation. Sometimes I fast or eat specific foods. It is also a time to set intentions for the new year. This year however, my only plan was to make it to that party. Covid has allowed me to overindulge my natural desire to withdraw from society and I need a healthy level of adult contact.

So, anyway, I will probably push the more spiritual and reflective celebration off until after my family celebrations are over.

I also used to participate in a thread on another board where we set manageable and seasonally appropriate goals for quarters and cross quarters (every six to eight weeks) unfortunately I can't do that anymore because a few people on that board have caused it to devolve over covid to the point where, if I posted about dsil's celebration, instead of getting "I'm sorry your dsil's family can't celebrate together." I would get rabid hateful opinions about the people choosing each location and the rest of my post's content would be ignored.

I like that length because it is more manageable than a year or a full season, but gives you a little more time to work on larger things. But I am happy with any length people want to set or each of us having our own time periods.

Ok, I am really going to finish decorating this tree before cookie baking!

Yes! On setting goals! Hurray on getting compliments on your tidiness, SubC and Lila!

We used to try to set goals at the beginning of each month. I am game for goals for the new year!

Had to log off early today due to fatigue. I napped then pulled myself together, got garbage out, cleaned kitty box, visited mom and wrote out cards and tips for the aides, then boyfriend stopped by with a case of water and some apples for mom. I came home and showered. Oh! And I did three loads of laundry tonight.

I baked my almond cake over two zoom meetings today but unfortunately I overbaked it. So I threw it out, went to the bakery, and bought a cake.

A lot to do here tomorrow. Still haven't finished wrapping gifts and my house is a pigsty. At least it is clean.

Can we talk goals? Like, for the new year?

I don't call them resolutions but I do try to tell myself, it's the end of a really awful year, and the start of a fresh new one. It gives me hope. I feel motivated to make some changes and have a better life. Anyone with me?

Anyway, I feel so comfortable with you guys now and you are so encouraging so I thought I would use this space to think out what I want to set as goals in the new year.

Goal 1: keep the living room, dining room, and bar counter uncluttered. That will mean dealing with anything in those areas each week... not letting things pile up, or get super dusty again. So at the end of 2022 I want to have them in as good of shape as they are now.

Goal 2: My bedroom, the kitchen, hall and upstairs closets/bathrooms. This is my big goal for 2022. I will gradually over this year sort the items in the kitchen cabinets, the 2 hall closets, 2 upstairs bathrooms, and my bedroom. That sounds like a lot so I should probably break it down, don't you think? How could I do that? That is 6 areas. I don't think I can do it one area at a time. You know how you get overwhelmed with one area and have to do something else? So maybe I can just alternate parts of my bedroom with the other 5 areas.

Goal 3: my health. Good heavens I have gained a lot of weight, even in the last few weeks. I would say ideally I should lose 80 pounds (and still would be about a size 14). But for THIS year, 50 would make me quite happy, so that is my goal. I think my main issue is lack of exercise. When I exercise I eat less.

Goal 4: train this dog. He is driving everyone crazy with his poor behavior, even though he is charming.

So I bought these extra pages for my planner, called Habit Trackers. Each month it has 6 habits and a box to color in for each day. Help me figure out what my 6 areas should be! Things I want to do pretty much every day for a month or more.

Thinking:
Exercise
Eat healthy, or some version of that - fruit/vegs?
Train the dog

Now what about the other 3 habits to track? Maybe
declutter something
clean something
??
Is there a better way to put it? Suggestions?

I also have a weekly tracker already in my planner for things I want to get done in a week. There's room for 5 habits there.

things I want to add somewhere:
study/read
in spring - yardwork
sheesh, I can't think of how to organize this.

Ideas?

Well, I got 6 or 7 presents wrapped. I also went into my bedroom and looked through the books on the bookshelf in there, and found 6 I don't want anymore. I put 5 of them in the donate box, and the other I am going to take to a meeting I'm going to and offer it to some friends there.

I looked at tracking and both boxes were delivered to my son. However he has not contacted me. So I texted him that 2 boxes were delivered, and not to leave them outside because they contain his childhood photos. He still has not replied and it is giving me anxiety. - okay, actually just before I hit post, he texted "I got them." So that's a relief, I now let it all go and it is his to do with as he wishes. I expect nothing more.

This has overall been a lazy day staying home not talking to anyone outside the home, which I needed.

Good morning! We had so much fun making cookies last night. A real joy. I am thankful. Now I am having my alone day to chill. I do need to wrap presents.

My DIL came in last night and commented "Wow! You've been cleaning, it looks so good in here!" That was NICE. It is so good when someone notices (you had that happen to SubC!) I am proud of myself.

I do need to "tidy up a bit" (I always thought it was nuts when people said that because for me it was always a monumental effort almost needing a shovel - but now, I can actually "tidy up" the living/dining areas in like 10 mins and it will be nice!) There are just a few items to put away, and I should run a dust cloth over the surfaces just to keep up on it. Wow... pretty cool to have one area in my house like this after so many years of clutter.

I would like to work on my kitchen more, and the bedroom, which is getting worse. Maybe it will be better when all the presents in there are wrapped and under the tree. I did not buy any wrapping paper this year (yay!) but am using what we had from last year. I think I will do a little more work on my room each day. I need to get my son's box filled with donations and put in the car. I don't want it in my room anymore.

How are you all doing today?

Good morning!

My tree is not decorated, but my Bean is here. Currently he is playing trucks with his "Pa-Pa".

Dd commented on how much progress I had made on the scullery when she dropped him off last night.

But now I will play with him all day instead of accomplishing anything else..

Oh well. Bean is the most important.

Wow! You are doing great, Lila and SubC!

I have to clear desk, dining table and coffee table. Won't be too hard, though. Have a few tiny presents to wrap, I'm almost out of tissue paper and the store shelves are bare. It's actually a good thing to see that due to supply chain or other reasons, the stores aren't overstocked with a bunch of junk. It feels less like waste and conspicuous consumption this year.

I have two remaining errands this year. That's it. I haven't done my Christmas cards and for some reason I'm still feeling solid.

I'm exhausted. I hope to be able to raise my energy level tmr.

I haven't even done any laundry. That's how tired I've been. Very low energy and very tired.

Lila, I call those tasks that look large but take minimal time "five minute miracles". It truly only takes five minutes to unload a dishwasher

The only thing I'm keeping up with is making my bed and doing the dishes.

I have to bake an almond cake tmr. For Christmas Eve.

Well, except I moved them to a room they don't go to because the room the go to is????

It's a process.

Just got a call from Dd. She's bringing the Bean out here to spend the night so they can clean their gutters tomorrow. Dh will return him when he goes to his guitar lesson tomorrow evening. Then they will be back on Friday for a short visit, drive up to dsil's uncles' for a Christmas Eve celebration, and back here to sleep.

Gotta go get the chores done!

hey good work SubC! Sometimes we have to move things as we clear. I figure as long as I am still making progress, it's fine to move some things to the room they go in, and deal with them later. It's worth it to finish a space.

I hit a stall because now my fam is coming to make cookies and although I want to, and enjoy it, and am happy and love them, it also is stressing me out! I am seriously lacking in alone time and also am having trouble figuring out what to let go of til after xmas and what to do now. One of my coping mechanisms is list-making, and I channeled that into a planner the last few years. So I sat here and fiddled with my planner, organized it a bit, highlighted some things. I will work on it some more later. I guess I am going to go take my dog in the yard to play fetch before they get here.

Yay Lila!

Enjoy your clean kitchen!

You should definitely get that sad box out ASAP.

I "finished" the small table of school stuff, but I "finished" it by moving sone things to the folding table in the basement and some things to the dining table on the porch h (although I did first clear some easier things off the dining table to ake room.

There is still bin on the scullery floor, and there is still a lot on the dining porch floor, but Dh thinks I have done well. I shifted gears to wash things that were piled on the scullery counter and will have a place to go when they become dry, so that got a little better. And I resigned a few items to a trash bag.

I was feeling overwhelmed and discouraged, but then I realized that all the things I have done today happened during the time I would usually be teaching (I would STILL be teaching) so really, I did a lot and if I didn't have a job, I could probably keep up with my house... (except I don't keep up with it in the summer either..what was I doing all summer? Gardening I guess.)

I think I'm going to rest a bit and then tackle the tree this evening.

part 3 -

the kitchen table is CLEAR!! It is totally empty and washed off! I am shocked it took only a total of about 15 minutes to get that done, when it was literally covered and piled. I am sharing this to encourage you guys:
1) it usually takes less time than we think to clear a space, and
2) once you have cleared a space that was hoarded up for months or years, if it gets re-cluttered, clear it ASAP! I did not let it go on for months, but cleared it within a couple weeks and it was SO much easier because everything there was recent stuff and I pretty much knew what to do with it all.

I learned a great lesson today.

Also, the bar counter is about 75% done, the dishwasher is unloaded/re-loaded, the counters are about 50% wiped off. And I even moved something from the living room and put it away.

I am actually proud of myself.... a nice change from feeling so ashamed of myself (which is unwarranted but I've felt it a lot over the state of my home). I keep glancing at that cleared table and feel surprised every time!

update - sitting down to have a cookie.

I got the table and bar counter about half cleaned off fairly quickly! A lot of it was mail and packages (Christmas presents). I moved the packages to my bed, and later I will open them so I can wrap everything. There were a couple boxes which I put in my room for donation boxes. A few small items all got put into a little bin. I sorted a pile of paper and bills and got rid of about half. There were dog toys and chews and I put them all in a small box and moved to my room (there is a dedicated dog treat bin and I will put them in there).

Now all that is left is bags of rolls and a box of protein shakes to put away, my sewing machine that needs to be put back into the closet, and a few random items. It was not nearly as hard as before when it was 5000 unrelated items.

The kitchen is still not touched. I was hoping my husband or son would come in an unload the dishwasher, but son fell asleep and husband went back to hiding in his room. It would be more trouble to ask him to do it. I hate unloading but I know it will take me less than 5 minutes so I am just going to do it, load it and turn it on, get counters wiped and sink washed out.

Living room is also cluttering back up and dusty. I don't know if I can deal with that today though but it is bothering me.

So my solitude for yesterday did not work out - I ended up having to get a task done and taking a friend along with me on those errands to work on things together. But it was pleasant. I enjoyed her company, but I do sorely miss being alone. So today, I am enjoying a quiet, peaceful morning with NO outside work. Family is coming this afternoon to bake cookies together, so that will be nice.

BUT!!! how can we bake cookies when then entire kitchen table and bar counter are once again covered AND stacked with clutter? And the kitchen isn't cleaned. So... I will work on those but it looks quite overwhelming. I don't know how it got this bad when I JUST spent all that time getting them cleared.

I mailed box #2. It had an album, son's fave book as a child, a few more of his ornaments I found and a small stocking, and the little quilt I made when I was pregnant with him. Plus cards for my grands. When I came home and went in my room I saw the empty box with his name on it and that hurt. I got that box when he was born and put all those things in it for over 30 years. How is that even possible? He is still a little boy in my head, and seeing his box with his name on it empty makes me sad. So that box is going to be the next donation box. I already put a couple of xmas decorations in it.

Will be back later as I try to clean surfaces.

Hello again.

So besides the (untouched) tree, my goals for cleaning today were to clear the scullery floor, clear the dining porch floor, and clear the small school table.

The scullery floor is mostly done - Dh swept it too! But the last few things are really hard because they are a bunch of individual items with no homes. They are all in a bin, but there is nowhere to put the bin.

I am thinking about switching to a new area even though it would feel so good to have that done.

Dh is being very nice to me. He offered to drive half an hour to drop off a big box of styrofoam for me. He hates dealing with styrofoam.

I almost didn't go to the party last night, but then at the last minute I did. It was nice. Far more lightly attended than in previous years, but a good group of people. Good food, some pleasant conversation.

All potters, and the gift exchange was to bring a piece of pottery you made in a plain brown paper bag. They had us draw numbers and someone wrote the numbers on the bags. The person who got mine seemed to really like it (I pulled a bowl out of unsold stock from when I was doing shows) and I got a pretty tumbler. The guy who made it said he didn't have much fired and that I could trade it for another piece if I want in January (he has work out at the studio.) I will probably keep it, but it's fun to know that if he puts one up I just fall in love with I can trade!

More cleaning and clearing today and I plan to finally get the tree done! (Maybe) nowhere to go at least. Dh agreed that I could set up a folding table in the corner of the basement and Kay out all my teacher stuff on it as I have been using the dining porch table and a smaller table in a guest room as desk space and I just don't have time to process all of this.

Happy Solstice! I love having you back, CM. SubC p, I'm glad you made the decision for some alone time. You don't need DH's family right now. And maybe see your husband's comments for what they were: he was sad you weren't there. Hello Road and Hello Lila.

Back to work for me
Oh I dreamt I was doing laundry and m pay Grandpa L gave me quarters for the dryer. (Although I use our common area washer and dryer, it is free).