Hi Tillie,

You hadn't posted yet when I posted.

I'm so sorry that your hoarder us still bringing things home. Is he ever gone for a while? Could you find a scrapper and sell a bunch of stuff and get a new toilet?

I'm guessing you don't have any kind of zoning authority that could force an outside clean up?

Jury duty was odd. They spent most of the morning screening jurors (I was picked) and then the defendant threw up during opening statements and we were all sent home.

Hi Subclinical 🙂
Here is a suggestion...
Define the space that you would like to keep the toys for the kid still living at home.
Explain to the child that this is their toy storage area and whatever fits there they can keep, excess needs to be donated.
Explain that space is limited and there is space you want for other activities.
Help the kid sort through all their toys and make good keep/donate decisions.
This is also a great teaching/learning exercise for the child as to how to make these kinds of decisions, problem solving. 🙂

This is how I helped my child reclaim his bedroom when his paternal grandparents insisted on giving him about three new toys every week and way too many on holidays.
He really enjoyed the donating to less fortunate children and taught him charity.

Subclinical
Rule number one is...
never throw out, toss. sell or touch a hoarder's stuff behind their backs.
That just makes the hoard even harder.
In this county they do not care what people do on their own property just as long as they pay their taxes and any licensing fees for businesses.
I could open a legal brothel here if I got the permit to.
Sorry, but the defendant throwing up made me laugh out loud. 😀

Tillie, so sorry to hear about your difficulties. I had a feeling things weren't going well on your end.

Hello, SubC, Tat, Porter, CM, and Anony.

I had yoga class this morning, so I feel good. The movement disorder got worse for a few weeks but improved the last few days. Just keeping my balanace.

Be well.

Tillie, so sorry to hear about your difficulties. I had a feeling things weren't going well on your end.

Hello, SubC, Tat, Porter, CM, and Anony.

I had yoga class this morning, so I feel good. The movement disorder got worse for a few weeks but improved the last few days. Just keeping my balanace.

Be well.

I was thinking more of having the toilet work done while he was gone. But yes, you are right that you would need buy in to get rid of his scrap. Too bad there isn't more of a homemade scented candle market.....

The "kid" still at home is the other hoarder. She is 20. We have purged many of the toys as they have grown. I am trying to be patient with her.

The oldest has three bins in my basement that she would probably take if I asked her to, but her dh is still sorting through his "inheritance" of mixed family heirlooms and garbage and I promised her a few years.

Basically, his father died tragically, his mother married her lover almost right away, and my poor son in law had one weekend to save whatever he wanted to keep because "stepdad" was selling the house.

Dd went up with him in her Honda Civic thinking she would help him pack stuff up, and then realized that "whatever he wanted to keep" included handmade by his father bedroom furniture and that his mother had already thrown everything from his and his sister's childhood (9 years apart) randomly into boxes. So dd took a deep breath and said "we'll take it all. You and J can sort it at our house. Start disassembling furniture, I'll go rent a uhaul."

That was 14 months ago - 3 months before his sister fled her abusive boyfriend. She just got back into a house in March, so now things are starting to get split up.

The boy is getting married in September and starting to look at houses. If he moves into a house, the star wars toys go there. He just (literally, instant messenger) told me to go ahead and get rid of his racecar track.

Being a night owl, but it's a nice quiet time to finally get this long post up. I'll use different colors and space to make it seem less like one huge Russian novel.

Last couple of weeks have been pretty busy with church and other commitments. I got several boxes' worth of items donated and helped at the church garage sale Thursday. I also went to some sales myself - another church and some neighborhood ones. But I was good - I really did need to look for certain clothing items and I found some of those. Yesterday I made it to the gym finally. Been out of the habit plus tired, so all I did was take a very leisurely swim and get in the hot whirlpool. But that's okay, it was a start, and a good de-stresser.

As for the rest of my current situation update - the storage unit is getting closer to being ready to move - it's less a matter of bringing it back from a total disaster now and more a matter of how much fine tuning I want to do before vs. after the move. And when the move can happen. Weather is definitely heading into hot now - 90s. Blech. I'll have a chat with the social worker at clutter club meeting the 21st and see what she thinks - if the Moving Minions can be gotten, that would be an incentive to go ahead. Otherwise wait till fall. But still I've come a long way from where I was at the beginning of the year, so that's something.

Okay, now to see if this will post and then this night owl will fly back into her hollow tree and get some shut eye!

Good morning all!

Porter, your wife is in hospice. I am confident that whatever money she has, she doesn't need it now. But you said she is a good mom. As a mom, I will tell you there is nothing questionable or borderline about what you did. She is leaving behind her daughter, and anything she has that will make her daughter's position in life more secure, should be used.

Does the hospice have support groups for you and your daughter? Based on my experience with hospice, I would strongly suggest you go if such a thing is available.

I am sorry for all the pain you are facing right now. You are doing great just keeping daily life going.

As a teacher, I have worked with a lot of goth kids who turned into delightful adults. Just keep an eye on her and her friends (also important with teenagers who appear to be bright and shiny) and keep listening. You may want to meet with the guidance counselor at the new school and let her know what is going on.

Tillie, did you get your house back into your comfort zone? I understand the snow now! I've been to Nevada in the summer. I grew up in a place where we said "it's not the heat, it's the humidity" in your case, "it's not the latitude, it's the elevation."?

People are hanging drywall in the addition. It's really hard for me to have people in my space. I spent a lot of yesterday out in the studio barn sorting through old boxes of toys. I am making a mess. But, I am resolved to throw away the inflatable pond octopus. I have loved it, but it was put away less than sanitary some years ago,and it is just gross. There is no cleaning this. It has to go. It doesn't take up that much space, but it goes take up space. Eventually the small things add up and bury you.

I am thinking about leaving home today. There are good reasons to and good reasons not to. I will see how it goes.

CM I am savoring your post! Thank you--I feel more hopeful now. I have read your post twice and will read it again in a bit.

It is 3:30 and brother called me at 8 to start the day. I'd barely gotten home and in bed from the wedding.

Thinking of you all. CM thank you! Loved reading about your activities, your thoughts on our individual activities and your next step plans! Any chance you'd consider not waiting for the perfect moment to change the storage and call it ready? Let me know--you seem to be flirting with that idea, even if you don't realize it!🙂

Well I haven't done much of anything today. Saw brother, took him on errands then napped. I've now showered and washed my hair, stripped sheets from bed and have dishwasher ready to go. This sounds like more than it is. The house is a furious mess and I'm tired.

Very hot today over 90F. Going to be hard to do much of anything next couple of days. I've kept my windows shut and drapes closed.

My legs hurt from all the bug bites from last night's wedding in the woods.

How are you?

Tatoulia, you have a lot of people to take care of! And no one else is taking care of you.

CM, I also enjoyed the long post! I am hopeful for you about your move.

I forgot to say that on Thursday Jim the pig farmer was back, so I only took my usual one box of stale bread. It means I also have to buy feed, but if is much easier to manage.

I went to a baby shower today and I took a like-new children's book that I already had (I tend to pick up good titles in good condition at good prices. Each of my kids is getting a starter library when they have children) with a gift certificate for an online store that has stuff I know the new mom wants, wrapped in a reused gift bag and tissue. Dd also went to the shower and wrapped her gift using my stash. Plus she helped with games and I was able to provide felt and safety pins. So, some outs. Small outs, but still outs.

Also I started soaking the orange glaze, and worked some more on organizing the studio.

I've finally got it all in the next house.

but disaster has me reeling. My wife has been sent to a hospice center. And my brother killed himself.
they locked the doors on me as I was trying to move .
I broke in and was arrested.
I got 95% and the 5% isnt needed in the new place.
So as it would happen . My wife quit paying bills in February without telling me. So I have to cough up $1245 and or live without some utilities. I could deal with except the new landlord is breathing down my neck about it already.

even my phone was stolen.
I don't know how long this wifi will be available to me . But as just finished putting the very last thing inside my home I thought of you people. I'm fine. Battered and bruised but not broken. I'm still working , and my daughter will be home on tuesday. Just the two of us. $125 a week from my wife disability will come my way. And that will be enough .
I know thing could be worse. So im thankful for it even if it's barely enough.

my escape about the flying bike has been nominal.
but just will point out that many species achieve flight.
humans have for over 100 years now. The largest species to take flight was a global flyer , was as tall as a giraffe.
My work area is set up in basement a 8x8 area dedicated to my projects. And a 10 for long tool counter across from the area to keep projects free of tools and clutter. I'm very pleased to have such dream to work on.

on the 20th will be 1 month since I started moving.
at first it nice when it was just furniture, but then the hoard came in from an organized stated to just stacks and stacks and stacks. Until it was a hoard again.
But I know I will get it done. I know I will because I've done this before, I have to set realistic goals and go room by room. I think I can manage to tame it by the 20th.
I could just dump it all in basement. But that would silly to rush so fast that I have to restack everything again and again. If I go according to plan it will slowly turn into a home again.

I've been so exhausted. I finally slept yesterday until my eyes just popped open. Im sad for my brother and my wife.
But I'm staying calm and trying to keep on keepin on.

Hi Porter 🙂
Thank you for posting.
You have my sincerest condolences
((((((HUGS))))))
Hang in there baby
Things have got to start looking up for you soon.

Porter, I am glad you are OK.

So sorry to hear about your loss of your brother and your other misfortunes. You are running into a lot of upsets at once.

You can handle it. Keep your perspective. Rest between projects. See you soon.

My sincere condolences, Porter. I am so very sorry.

Oh porter, I am so sorry!

I was so excited to see your post, but then how hard.

You made it to the new house though. You made it. Your daughter is there.

I hope your creditors will work with you. Have you asked about a payment plan? Explained that the bills were unpaid because a terminally ill woman didn't let you know she couldn't handle the finances anymore and you thought things were ok?

I am glad you have your workspace. You have time to organize things. A month is not long at all. If I could get the rest of my hoard organized in a month, I would think I was superwoman.

Take care of yourself and let us know how you are doing when you can.

Porter, thanks for the update. Sorry you've had all that to deal with. We're all behind you buddy.

Hi everyone!

Very hot day here. Really awful. I'm working from home. Have dusted the bedroom and dine a lot of laundry. The laundry really heats up the house. I need to vacuum but just so hot.

I slept with AC on in the bedroom last night and I slept very well. Would like a repeat for tonight.

It's garbage night and I never feel like taking it out on Mondays. I need to, because I won't be up early enough to get out tomorrow before pickup. I did take recycling out earlier today.

I unloaded dishwasher and visited mom. I just wish I could force myself to vacuum.

I need to remind myself of how much happier (or st least, less miserable) I am when it's hot and my house is cleaner. I really hate my house when it's filthy and hot.

The living room is in shambles but at least I'm keeping bedroom nice.

Hi Everybody

Super depressed due to the weather the last few days.
I do not mind the rain & hail and the dark dreary days.
It's the friggin cold that's got me down.
A high temperature of 40 degrees is not enough and with the raging winds it's really a lot colder.
The cats are all feeling the same way as me.
We are all constantly grouching at each other and that just makes us all that much more miserable.
Tomorrow they are promising it will be 70 degrees and I know I will feel so much happier then. 😉

Oh Tillie i am sorry you are so depressed and I hope the weather delivers as forecasted and you feel better.

I did take my garbage out then went to sleep with AC on. I just woke up and I'm feeling feverish. I had an English muffin and a large glass of water. I must have consumed my weight in water today so I can't imagine it's dehydration. I think it's just lousy weather. Kitty has spent the last two days sleeping in her carrier. The top is mesh so it doesn't hold in the heat and yet it gives her a sense of security. That, or she desperately wants to go back to my BFs house.

Tillie, depression makes everything hard. Go easy on yourself. I am wondering where you are - I have hot weather like tatoulia.

I went to the grocery store today and just bought the food on my list, plus some cherries, strawberries, and a grapefruit. Those are ok treats. The prices were good.

I dropped off the plastic recycling and two little bags of trash.

I also went to class again and brought home two pages of notes and an example to put in my studio. That's a very useful thing though.

Tatoulia, I hope you feel better. Did you get your garbage out?

My kitty wants to go outside and he can't because I had to put out a "special treat" fir a raccoon tonight (he'd been eating my chickens and won't give up)

Good Morning Everybody 🙂

Hi Anonymoniker 🙂
The heat is a killer!
Stay out of it.
Plus the older we get the less our bodies can tolerate it. (((HUGS)))

Hi Joan 🙂
Keep searching out good alternative ways. 😀

Hi Tatoulia 🙂
So sorry that cough is hanging on (((HUGS)))
I would try drowning it out with lemonade and/or tea with lemon and honey, but that's just me. ;D
Hoping you have a blast at the wedding and even dance!
WTG! for finding a permanent home for the hair dryer!
So nice when we can finally "put" something away away.

Hi CriticalMass 🙂
Looking forward to catching up with you 😀

Hi Subclinical 🙂
Yes I put on shoes and went to the grocery store.
Didn't get a cantaloupe but did get a HUGE watermelon and a bunch of other lovely produce. 🙂
About the yogurt cups...
my thinking is, if you still get yogurt in those non-recyclable cups then toss these and just collect the new ones as they come in.
But I really don't know your situation or how things go there and maybe these are the last yogurt cups you will ever get. ;D

HELLO PORTER!!!
We all miss you 🙁

After grocery shopping yesterday I had a nagging headache that aspirin didn't help.
I was exhausted and kept falling asleep the rest of the afternoon/evening.
Weather here has turned cold again.
Snow predicted in the higher elevations.
My plans for this weekend are....
I have no plans ;P

Did very little today.
one of those headaches that I can't seem to rid of.
I sorted out some of the bill issues. At least for now.
sending a check from my wife's account.
it's a question ably unethical move.
But I feel like I'm robbing Peter to pay paul, and hope it buys me ten days.
I've written all here checks for several years.
she has the money, and I'm not applying it to the new place.
just paying off the old place.

The house is safe to move around in.
I try to stick to large things, but start puttering around with the junk. I've purged so much , but I'm still technically and officially a hoarder.

thank you all for the support. Its hard, I didn't realize my phone was missing , my brother called me again and again for support, but I was busy and unaware.
I know it's not my fault. But it knaws at me real deep.
He's gone, and it's ok to grieve. With and without people.

My wife and I talk on phone now alot.
I try to be her normal.
My daughter , what can I say. 14 and into dark clothes and edgy music. Its like just want to slap some pastel tape on her and hope it catches on. Shes really trying to be a challenge , but that's ok. I just want her to feel at home and make sure she access to support without having to be attention seeking.

I'd say 95% of the heavy things are in place.
it's just now keeping what makes the house function
in a presentable arrange ments. And removing the tubs thatneed to stowed away. So im much closer to light at the of the hallway.

What struggling on is being so tired of the stuff.
no amount of sleep lifts my energy level.

I look at it like this.
I might feel better when it's all put away. But prolonging it until feel I like it will make it feel overwhelming.

Evacuate 1 room per day+ what im intrested in accomplishing.

in the storage area for clutter. I'm using a method that each room of the house has its own box or boxes.
I hope to purge most of what doesnt work at the new place.

I was offered to help clear my brothers belongings.
I declined. And let my other brother deal and keep his things . He was not a hoarder. I need to focus on my own stuff.

Tatoulia, that is great about your hair dryer! It must feel really good. I love it when I find a place for something.

So, these actually might be the last yogurt cups I ever get. I stopped buying yogurt in little cups two years ago, and I hope I never need to again.

I could, of course, ask the parents to provide yogurt cups. But our parents are so great and so helpful - when the science teacher needed two liter bottles, the parents sent them in full - because nobody drank soda. One parent helpfully provided paper cups in case someone else's kid wanted to drink the soda. I don't want them buying trash just so I can use it!

Dh and dd moved the ping pong table from the studio/shop barn to the new basement space under the addition. There is more room than we thought there would be, and dh says if I will sweep the floor I can move my exercise bike out there to stay. Both of those things open up space for me. Also, it's really nice of dh because I wasn't supposed to get to put anything in the new space. He doesn't usually give me space because he worries that I will hoard it, so maybe this means that he believes I am changing?

Of course then I took advantage of the new space in the studio barn to spread out a bunch of stuff I wanted to sort through. So it looks worse. But, I found a doll carriage from when I was little. My kids played with it, but they didn't love it the way I did, and looking at it now, there are a lot of things about it that are not really safe. It needs to go. I will take it to goodwill, because it is pretty close to antique at this point and someone might want it as a collectible. That is a pretty big thing.

Greetings from northern Nevada 😀

Sun is shining and at 60 degrees already outside.
Going to be a better day! 😀

Hi Porter 🙂
Hoping you have someone there in real life to talk to.
You are going through such a difficult time. (((HUGS)))

Hi Tatoulia 🙂
Hope you are feeling better (((HUGS)))
Hasn't been that long ago that you were so terribly ill and your body still needs extra special care.

Hi CriticalMass 🙂
loved your long post.
Thank you for updating us.
Keep up all the great works! 😀

Hi Anonymoniker 🙂
How's going there?
Hope the spiders aren't too many (((HUGS)))

Hi Joan 🙂

Hi Subclinical 🙂
Sorry you have to resort to such drastic measures to protect the chickens 🙁

My house is a disaster area.
That's what happens when I have a "pity party".
So today I will wash dishes, vacuum the carpet and generally straighten it up.

I'm working from home today. Still sick but it's moving deeper into my chest which I see as progress. I am also going to fast today.

I am washing my bed linens now. Will dust and vacuum bedroom today and will again tackle the question of where to put my suitcase. There are more pressing matters but getting home from work yesterday and having my room clean was such a great feeling and I need to feel this way everyday. Get this to a habit level.

Thank you both, Tatoulia and SubC, for the good wishes about my "sheets" (really a bare mattress). I remember when I was in my 20s how much I liked clean sheets. However, now I am demanding more from the universe: a body that sleeps deeply amd regularly. The universe is putting up a fight, but I'll win in the end.

Unfortunately I have no "team" on this plane to give me any practical help with my daily tasks, such as home maintenance, sheet changing, etc. There are many reasons for this, and most of them wouldn't be apprended even if I tried to explain, so I won't try. The nature of my job on the planet seems to require a monastic sort of life, meaning a solitary MONOastic life.

Tillie, glad you agree with me on the value of sleep and meditation. Love the cat stories. I gave up on pets about 15 years ago, when my goldfish Pumpkin died and I realized I was too sick to even keep a fish in good health. SubC, I have a life-long movement disoder that is very difficult to manage, plus other health issues.

Anony, I see your emotional upset as progress. Anyone who really sees what is going on and has been going on on this planet would be very upset. People are starting to see and respond to the conditions we live with here, and to question whether improvements are in order. You are an old soul, so you are a natural empath and are affected by the planetary shifts.

If I forgot anyone, my apologies. Tat, hope you feel better soon. You are doing the right thing to take care of yourself

Hi Joan--i appreciate your giving us a glimpse of your struggles. It is certainly a tough existence and I am so pleased you are here with us.

My kitty is next to me, purring away right now. She'll be thirteen this summer and she's so dear. She looks older to me, but that's fine. I do not look the way I did when I went to the shelter so many years ago, looking for a cat to be my co-pilot.

I only dusted one surface in the bedroom today. During lunch I went up to my mother's to change the litter box. Her regular cleaning lady is on vacation and the substitute doesn't clean the boxes (understandable--her usual person does it as a favor). After work I did some shopping I needed to do for a wedding this weekend,

I did finally clean my bathroom sink and the vanity and the toilet. The tub is still gross, as is the floor, but I'm getting there. I also cleaned the mirror in the bathroom, honestly this took no time at all.

I have the coffee ready to start up in the AM. all of the dishes are in the dishwasher and I wiped down the one clear counter.

I have to be at work on time tomorrow, none of my usual hijinks as we have an all-department meeting that starts promptly at nine. I am also presenting at it so I need to be use and awake.

One habit I've learned since I came here is I fold and put away my laundry. What a giant difference in my life. Takes no time.

Good morning everybody!

Tatoulia, movie into your chest didn't seem like a good thing, but it sounds like you are on the mend. Glad you have your kitty to make you feel better. My kitty (actually my son's kitty who was left behind) is always the best company when I am low.

Yesterday I took care of the cherries. I made some cheese, but it wasn't coming out well, so I quit. I stirred the red glaze.

The inspector couldn't come and I didn't do any evaluations, and so I must do them all today because they are due in the morning. I intended to reread them today for editing before sending them in.

My kitchen is a horrible mess. I never checked the mail, which kept papers out. I did make dinner. I filled the washing machine and forgot to start it.

I feel discouraged today. And I overslept. Dh did not set the alarm. I know that sleep is important, but it is always better when I go to bed early, not sleep late. Instead I stayed up too late last night.

But the inspector IS coming, and we have drywall being delivered this morning. I am going to do the farm chores, and then, aside from those two interruptions, I will focus on the evaluations like a laser beam until they are done. I am supposed to help at the food bank at 4:30.

Good luck today, SubC. Deep breaths! Lots of water!