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Hoarding Help Message Boards : The Daily Chat : What Are You Doing Today?
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What Are You Doing Today?
   

Tillie
Posted: 10 February 2016 - 09:21 AM
Hi Dave :)

I am going to ask you the same question I ask here at my house....
Just what? are you planning to store in those 1,875,000 pill bottles any ways???

And, no, those peeled bottles are not valuable because they still have those frustrating/infuriating child proof caps.

:)
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dave
Posted: 10 February 2016 - 08:28 AM
There is a conspiracy going on. The pharmaceutical industry is conspiring against hoarders. The labels on the plastic prescription bottles (at least the ones from my pharmacy) are no longer peelable (have not been for long time). This means I can no longer save the bottles to put stuff in. At least if I don't want my hippa information spread around. grrr.
(Does this mean my small supply of really old bottles with peelable labels are valuable?)
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Diane
Posted: 09 February 2016 - 10:07 PM
Hi all, good to hear what you are doing today. I took the day "off". Went outside first thing before I got stuck inside doing things. No pressure for the first day in over a week. I ended up working in the yard all day. I chopped down all the dead stuff raked it up. Changed grit in tumblers, did more rock hounding in yard, just basically worked in yard all day, which I enjoyed.
My car is full of donations now, still room in front seat. I told my helper/friend, that one car load a week is all I am comfortable with, last week was too much. Nothing is stained, no mouse poop, all this is from inside living area. Last year when I did the garage, the hoard was just the opposite, lots of droppings, stains, disgusting stuff, easy to decide to throw away. More difficult when everything is fairly new.
Still difficult when I have a lot of small stuff that has no home. It has a temporary home on living room floor, seems to like to stay there.
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dave
Posted: 09 February 2016 - 03:51 PM
Tillie,
sorry about the rodent problem. I hate mice around the dwelling. I can't keep them out of the garage completely, but have blocked access to the house. I used some poison in the garage (between pets) and managed to cut the population down somewhat.

Several years ago while the garage was still hoarded beyond goat paths I had one mouse fall into a cat sand bucket (those are a little less valuable than plastic sacks in that you CAN get too many of THEM!). I heard the squeaking but didn't realize what happened until too late. That's the only time I've really heard them. I did get closely acquainted with the poop once when I tripped and fell out there, bringing a stack of boxes down around me (a la Langley Brothers).
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CriticalMass
Posted: 09 February 2016 - 02:28 PM
Interim report:

Some of life is re-normalizing or falling into place or whatever. The person who was ready to pass on went peacefully, the funeral date is set. The animal that had surgery (for which I will be sitting while roomie attends funeral) is more self sufficient again. I was sick over the weekend but am better. I think it was all the stress.

The latest round of vehicle repairs took another bite out of my bank account, but it could've been worse. It's like the Johnny Cash song "One Piece At a Time" - well, one piece at a time I should have a like-new vehicle, LOL.

Last week before letting the mechanic have it I needed to get some stuff out of it so I ran that stuff over to the storage unit. That was pretty darn depressing. But it sparked a few ideas of things I might be able to talk myself into letting go of. So good may come out of it yet.

I'm just still regaining my energy and trying to figure out where I left off before so much happened. That seems to be 90% of my life, trying just to get my bearings.

Thanks for all being here. Hope it gets better for you too. Diane, don't let the helper intimidate you. I know it's hard because without the helpers sometimes we dither too much and get stuck, but they shouldn't rush us too much either. Take care.
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CriticalMass
Posted: 09 February 2016 - 02:27 PM
Interim report:

Some of life is re-normalizing or falling into place or whatever. The person who was ready to pass on went peacefully, the funeral date is set. The animal that had surgery (for which I will be sitting while roomie attends funeral) is more self sufficient again. I was sick over the weekend but am better. I think it was all the stress.

The latest round of vehicle repairs took another bite out of my bank account, but it could've been worse. It's like the Johnny Cash song "One Piece At a Time" - well, one piece at a time I should have a like-new vehicle, LOL.

Last week before letting the mechanic have it I needed to get some stuff out of it so I ran that stuff over to the storage unit. That was pretty darn depressing. But it sparked a few ideas of things I might be able to talk myself into letting go of. So good may come out of it yet.

I'm just still regaining my energy and trying to figure out where I left off before so much happened. That seems to be 90% of my life, trying just to get my bearings.

Thanks for all being here. Hope it gets better for you too. Diane, don't let the helper intimidate you. I know it's hard because without the helpers sometimes we dither too much and get stuck, but they shouldn't rush us too much either. Take care.
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Tillie
Posted: 09 February 2016 - 11:26 AM
Good Morning Everybody :D

What a GREAT discussion going on here! :)

Hi Dave :)
We all can so much more easily make those keep/toss decisions about someone else's stuff because we have no emotional/ownership attachment to other people's stuff.
The hoarding person that I live with has absolutely no problem tossing anything of mine to make room for more of his stuff.
WAY TO GO! for surrendering the buttons to Mrs. Dave. :D

Hi Roxie :)
"CLINK!"
Your tiny glass boot collection sounds lovely. :D

Hi Tatoulia :)
YEA! WTG! for vacuuming and declogging the sink! :D
Sorry you injured yourself, heal well. (((hugs)))

Hi Karl :)
Were you able to find the needed buttons to fix your shirt?
That party sounds like fun. :D

Hi Diane :)
When doing a clean out the person who owns the items always has the last word on if an item stays or goes...
unless the items are contaminated with mold, or any bodily fluids, poop or pee from animals or humans or where something has died and decomposed, or some sort of chemical contamination or the item is damaged making it too hazardous to be around.

Those things are then biohazards and MUST be disposed of properly.

Have absolutely no idea what I will be doing today.
Fed the cats their breakfast & will scoop litter boxes & give them fresh water.
Extremely depressed, looked in the carport and saw that he has been amassing large trash bags full of food related garbage in there.
The bags have been chewed/clawed open and contents scattered.
This is not helping at all with the rat/mouse problem. :(






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dave
Posted: 09 February 2016 - 08:34 AM
So....
I can fix you all's problems very easily by telling you to discard stuff. What you don't see is me not dealing with my own problem of too much stuff.

I am quite upset about my latest "too much stuff" lecture/demand from Mrs. Dave this morning. The humor here being that someone might say-Hey, page through the ... thread and look for some comments from a guy named dave. they might help you. :):)

so once again I have to figure out an approach to the piece of concrete that is my head! (I have already given the collector buttons that I can remember to Mrs. Dave. Maybe I have to give her the repair buttons too, although the larger problem involves more than buttons, socks and plastic bags.)
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Dave
Posted: 09 February 2016 - 12:25 AM
You are coping with a variant of the old pogo cartoon -- we have met the enemy and he is us. Looking honestly at ourselves, making changes, and doing it without a lot of guilt and self recrimination is always a challenging experience.
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Diane
Posted: 08 February 2016 - 09:00 PM
Thanks so much for your comments, needed to hear from you today. I hauled more stuff out, worked on odds and ends in rock room, then hit a wall emotionally. Feel like I need a break, but do not allow myself a break, feel pressured by helper. Feel like I have to finish things or she will just throw everything out like last week. I am still raw from last week.
Thanks for the button chat. She did see some and had me get rid off 2 big jars, appeared to be just worthless buttons, but others I want to go through, so need to put them out in garage in secret place. I want things gone, just going so fast, emotions need some healing. I want to cancel this week, and am afraid to, need help, can not do this alone. She comes for 2 hours and it is like a tornado, she just makes instant decisions and it is gone. I don't want to spend another year sorting through things, but so much every week is uncomfortable. How do I get some balance with what I need and what helper wants? I feel depressed tonight and unsure what to do. I did spend time outside in the sun, burned old bank statements, private stuff, cleaned up yard debris and burned it, a little rock hounding in yard, so no reason to be depressed. Ok, maybe a little reason, whole life is turned upside down. Letting people in to my house, letting them go through hoard etc.
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Karl
Posted: 08 February 2016 - 04:47 PM
I took out a nice shirt that I wanted to wear for the household Asian New Year celebration, and discovered that it's missing two buttons. I guess that'll be my next mending task.
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Tatoulia
Posted: 08 February 2016 - 03:16 PM
Hello All!

I did vacuum my bedroom yesterday and I do plan to put vacuum away today. Honestly, as I write this I think, what sort of plan do I think need to make? Got more snow today and I just finished shoveling out front. Boyfriend came over to help me.

Diane, you are doing a great job. If sorting and looking at the buttons is soothing, by all means do so. If you have them in jars or bags and they don't fill, say, half a room, then what's the harm? When I cleared out a lot of my vintage glass and dishes, I kept say two of these things and four of those things and let the rest go. So I have what I can use but no more. And as I break things, I let them go instantly. A chipped cup means GO, a broken that thing means GO. I don't get the sense that your button collection takes up square footage so please do with them what you wish. You aren't cheating. If you choose not to discuss it with your helpers then it's your call. If you feel comfortable saying my button jars are non-negotiable (at least for now) then you say it.

I am so impressed by your progress--actually everyone's progress! It feels good to accomplish. I de clogged my slow moving bathroom sink today and was ever so tempted to keep cleaning the bathroom. I need more rubber gloves--I am out and I cut my thumb yesterday and it bled for an unusually long time. I will find other things to do between now and when I get more gloves. Like finishing up those plans to put away the vacuum🙂
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Roxie
Posted: 08 February 2016 - 02:47 PM
(((Tillie, Dave, Diane, those missing in action))))

A collect of something does not necessarily mean a hoard. I have a collection of miniature glass boots. (No idea why but I like them.) But they are all contained in one nice, small wall shelving unit with a glass door on it. Not getting in the way as yet.

When de-hoarding one must expect both emotional and physical impacts. We can weather them because we can expect them, and they will pass.
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dave
Posted: 08 February 2016 - 01:42 PM
OOPs-double post. (but that does sorta stress how important I thought that process was at the time. You can visualize me scrounging through the AmVets bags for missed buttons while I was doing the "Darci" list for taxes.)
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dave
Posted: 08 February 2016 - 01:39 PM
I went through a period 4-5 years ago where I carefully removed the extra buttons and/or top collar button from shirts before I donated them to create a stash of repair buttons. Same for "Docker" type pants if they had a spare button sewn inside.
(I also thought I could create a "valuable", "historic" brand name button collection.) :) :) !!
I will NOT entertain discussion as to whether any repairs have taken place or button display boards have been created. :) :)
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dave
Posted: 08 February 2016 - 01:39 PM
I went through a period 4-5 years ago where I carefully removed the extra buttons and/or top collar button from shirts before I donated them to create a stash of repair buttons. Same for "Docker" type pants if they had a spare button sewn inside.
(I also thought I could create a "valuable", "historic" brand name button collection.) :) :) !!
I will NOT entertain discussion as to whether any repairs have taken place or button display boards have been created. :) :)
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Tillie
Posted: 08 February 2016 - 09:52 AM
You're right Dave
but she is hiding them to keep them from being lost in the clean out and I fear that at this point in time she would possibly regret losing them all.
Since they are a small enough batch to easily hide, I think they should stay for a while as the larger, less wanted items leave.
Once she has done the majority of the necessary purging she may want to spend the time it will take to sort them and reduce them down to a fine collection.
She could use the down time as a reward for doing her daily maintenance.

One hard thing about decluttering is figuring out what you truly want or need and Diane's reluctance to even allow her helpers to see her buttons tells me she should not let them go at this time, or maybe even ever.
:)
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dave
Posted: 08 February 2016 - 09:28 AM
I think Diane's problem is whether she can add button sorting to daily life activities, current cleaning projects, rock collecting and tree climbing. I think she is dealing with one of those really hard junction points of sentiment, reality and potential values that come in trying to clean up.
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Tillie
Posted: 08 February 2016 - 08:03 AM
BUTTONS

One of my fondest early childhood memories is when Granma would let me sift through her button tin.
All the different buttons and bits & bobs of jewelry fascinated me for hours.
She would often allow me to keep an item, hard decision to make with so many wonderful things to choose from.
I still have some of those treasures.
Keep in mind that I do NOT have any hoarding tendencies.
But, I do have buttons.
I now have my own tin full of plastic, metal and Bakelite buttons and assorted bits of jewelry and tiny little toys.
My depression glass cookie jar is completely filled with shell buttons, old and new. And there are some pieces of jewelry in there too.
An antique leaded glass candy dish/with cover is filled with the special old, old glass and hand painted porcelain buttons.

Marie Kondo says to "toss ALL buttons, you never use them anyway".
She is wrong!
For me, buttons "SPARK JOY!".

I have noticed that some people are selling their Granma's old tins of buttons for up to 50.00.
So my button collection must be valuable too, which is a good argument for keeping my treasured collection.

These last fifty years of my life I have only kept the pretty buttons and I have them sorted and the fancy ones in the dishes are displayed in the glass enclosed cabinet built on the side of my antique secretary desk in the living room.

Plus, some of these buttons are heirlooms that came from two of my Grandmas and some are mementos from friends who have passed.
One I found while exploring an old abandoned ghost town.

When it comes to button collections the same rules apply that we should use for any other type of collections.

Keep the best and let go of the rest.
Maintain them and proudly display them. :)


The museum has old buttons beautifully displayed in picture frames hung on the wall.



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Diane
Posted: 07 February 2016 - 09:11 PM
Oh, forgot about today. I forgot timer when I started working today, worked too many hours without a break. Carried out bags of trash and bags of donations,then rearranged art and rocks in room, closer to being done in there. Dishes, how long will it really take to do? Less time than I think, just need to start them. I went rock hounding in yard all afternoon. Didn't want to burn all the papers I boxed today, Sunday, will do tomorrow when neighbors are at work, did also get some leaves etc to burn. Tomorrow I will call thrift store for pickup Thursday. I always haul donations to store, but so much this week. Last week friends hauled it away, told them thrift store this week, don't want to impose on them.
One thing that is difficult for me is to get rid of all the bins and hangers I have empty now, silly but think I need them. It feels like giving up fat clothes, may need them again. I collected costume jewelry for years as well as old buttons, difficult to get rid of. It would be ok to keep the good ones, problem is there are tons of not so great buttons and jewelry mixed in with them. Is it worth going through them? My tendency is to spend hours sorting stuff, and see no progress. just not ready yet so I hide them from helpers. True confession!
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Diane
Posted: 07 February 2016 - 08:57 PM
Hello ladies, I forgot how much I enjoy your posts, when I was not on here for months. So heartwarming hearing of your adventures. Mouth now watering thinking of curry dish. I agree with "how little time it takes" I have a tendency to think, "it takes to much time, and I will just mess it up anyway", negative thinking/depression big part of a hoarders lifestyle. I have come close to canceling cleaning help, because I fear failing, loss etc., so good to read try it anyway, and so what if it is not up to my or others standards.
Tillie, I have been thinking of what you said about therapy and massive cleanouts, thank you for that.
I also appreciate that in 8 months a flat surface grows a pile of unknowns in a hoarders house, it is a fact. Nice I am not alone. When the pile grows tells me I am a failure, turning that around, have to admit, Tillie's constant yapping about maintenance is the only way to stop a creeping pile, has nothing to do with being a failure, has to do with learning new behaviors, to make life better.
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Tillie
Posted: 07 February 2016 - 05:02 PM
Hi Roxie! :D

Lemonade "CLINK!"

WAY TO GO!!!
sending down the laundry, tidying and filing papers! :D


OK...
I fried the two pork chops.
Had a pot of rice already cooked.
Removed the chops from the pan and added the rice to the pan with a little salad oil.
Added curry powder and stirred it into the rice as it fried.
Then I pushed the rice to one side of the pan and scrambled two eggs in the cleared area.
Stirred that into the rice.
Added some peas, stirred again.

I made big batch because I love it so much and will eat it all, over the next few days.
P.S. the pork chops turned out very tender and juicy! :D

Sorry about the computer problems you are having. :(
Post when you can. (((hugs)))
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Roxie
Posted: 07 February 2016 - 01:33 PM
Tillie, fried rice curry? What is that?

My keyboard still is acting up and now I have no sound on my computer. grrr I'll keep this sht.

I tidied up around my computer and sent the handwash down the laundry chute for regular wash. Filed away a handful of papers.

Hugs and coffee clinks.
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Tillie
Posted: 07 February 2016 - 12:59 PM
Good Morning Everybody :D

Hi Diane :)
WAY TO GO!!!
Fantastic job you are doing with your new lapidary room and also for taking better self care.

Yes, it was nice when I too found Cory's news letter in my email. ;)

Something that has been foremost in my thinking lately is that I am older than I was before and my wants and needs have changed drastically over the years.
Things that I used to want or do have fallen out of style for me.
I want my stuff and home to reflect who I am now.
Example...
I used to tat lace but no longer have the desire to, so I will let my shuttles go.
I no longer cook for anyone but myself, so I will let the kitchen items I no longer need go.
But, there are new interests I have that I am really enjoying, so I will fill my time with them.

Letting go of the things of the past is opening up space and time for all the things I want in my here and now.
Do not allow the past to keep us from our new adventures.
(((hugs)))

Hi Tatoulia :)
See my hand raised?
WAY TO GO!!!
Great job vacuuming and WTG! for Miss Kitty not freaking out! :D

That is a good perspective to keep in mind.
If we don't try because we fear failure, we never will accomplish anything.
Plus there are usually snags involved in most everything we attempt but when we keep at it we usually are victorious! :D

Well...
Half of the snow has melted. The ice sickles are dripping. Lots of mud everywhere.
Not a good day to play outside even though the sun is shining and it should warm up to 40 degrees today.
Will watch videos, do some beading, cook pork chops and fried rice curry & clean the kitchen.

TTYS :D
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Tatoulia
Posted: 07 February 2016 - 12:21 PM
PS to Diane--I wasn't being flippant in my "such is life" remark, I was instead verbalizing my philosophy these days--trying so hard in my life to move on from bad things! Not trying to deny anyone of their emotions! I've been under a lot of stress lately and I try to tell myself, nothing ventured nothing gained, so that when something doesn't work out, I have a perspective that keeps me from crying. Please, please, I hope everyone on here knows me well enough--sometimes I get dizzy when I see that it's been eight months since I inherited some of those most beautiful things in the world and I see that one of them is piled high with God know what. My hoarder tendencies and lifestyle are a constant battle.
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Tatoulia
Posted: 07 February 2016 - 12:15 PM
Just re read some posts. Diane, it sounds like fun to rearrange the furniture--I hope it goes well and if it doesn't turn out yo be fun, well, such is life.

I just vacuumed the "library" including the couch and I vacuumed the rug under my desk. It took no time at all. Very pleased. Even Miss Kitty didn't seem to freak out (which is likely a sign of how unfamiliar the noise is). I'm going to peek in the bedroom and if she's not asleep in there, I will quickly vacuum the bedroom too.
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Tatoulia
Posted: 07 February 2016 - 10:39 AM
Hello everyone! Glad to see you all!

I am up a little late today and just enjoying some coffee. If I vacuum today I'll feel really good about myself. Doesn't take any time at all yet it looms large in my mind. Raise your hands if that's too familiar--(I had to raise both of my hands). I can't wait to find out how little time it takes. I'm going to try to think in those terms--how little time something takes rather than how much time it takes. That may help me out today.

Much love to you all. Diane I don't want to keep putting the spotlight on you but I continue to be thrilled every time your name pops up. But the same holds true for Tollie, LR, Roxie, CM and everyone else--you are all special to me.
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Diane
Posted: 06 February 2016 - 08:29 PM
Hi Cory, thanks for the newsletter, really enjoyed reading it tonight.
Dear Tillie, I am so happy to hear from you today, you are so wise and kind. I worked on my lapidary room today, made lots of progress, did work too long, you do know me so well.
I laughed reading your post, as I sipped on my smoothie!!!! Good memory you have. I was surprised at how much there is still to do in there. I did get the whole floor vacuumed. Arranged some of my polished rocks, love my rocks, what a gift. My rocks bring me such joy it helps me to see how little value my hoard has.
Tillie I really do appreciate your suggestions. Tomorrow I will do much less than today. Hope you are having a nice weekend.
Cory I appreciated your reminder to set a timer, I will use timer tomorrow, thanks.
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Tillie
Posted: 06 February 2016 - 12:44 PM
Good Morning Everybody :D

Hi Cory :)
GREAT! to "see" you today. ;D
Thank you for everything you do for us so that we have this wonderful place to connect.
(((hugs)))

Hi Diane :)
Thank you, (as I sigh with relief).
Did you know that the hoarders featured on "HOARDERS" talk with a therapist before filming begins, during filming and are offered continued therapy afterward, should they accept it?
What we see is only a very small part of the therapy during the clean out.
There are times when the professionals see that it is time to "push" a little harder, but more important, they see when it is time to back off/slow down, take a different approach.
Knowing you as well as I do, I know that you tend to push yourself until you are physically, emotionally and mentally burned out.
You should always try to end a decluttering session on a positive note and not totally exhausted.

So HAPPY you are slowing it down.
Now, make some fruit smoothies, eat, shower, rest and sleep.
Think through how you want your lapidary room to be set up.
(((HUGS)))
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Cory Chalmers
Posted: 06 February 2016 - 09:59 AM
I just wanted to drop in and say hello, good morning and Happy Saturday!

It is great to see the message boards coming to live again after the snag with the spammers. I have blocked so many of them but continue to monitor to make sure it is staying clear.

Keep up your amazing self work, and support of each other. You all know how valuable of a place this is so make it work for each of you :)



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Diane
Posted: 05 February 2016 - 05:24 PM
Hi everyone. Tillie you are so right. This morning I worked more on stuff I have to go through, got a batch done. Brought more stuff out of rock room to go through. I realized I am feeling so much pressure to complete that room before next Thursday, and it feels impossible. Just got off phone with helper/director of my clean out, told her it is too much, I am feeling raw, so many feelings, not feeling the joy she would think I would feel. Just feel rushed and pressured, and so much is left to do in there. She agreed with me and realized I am very different from her and it is too much too soon. We agreed on this weeks assignment. Thursday she will help me rearrange furniture etc. and time permitting we will do entry way, no new room. I feel relieved, not like I can go on vacation, but at least enjoy the trip I am on this weekend, exploring my new space and time to think about what I really want in there and best way to set up tumblers etc. That room is so cold, wish I could sort in there instead of messing up living room. Maybe I will work on it for a few hours, put donations and garbage outside and remaining work back in the rock room until I am ready for it. I need a shower, clean bed sheets, that shall now be my priority, my self care is non existent feeling the pressure of this huge clean out. Thanks for reality check. I came to this conclusion and doubted I had a right to go slower, then reading your comment made me realize it is a big deal and I am not a victim, I can say my need to slow down. I am not lazy just need to take it a little slower. I am not on a hoarder show where they get it all done in a week, I think my helpers think that the hoarder show has all the answers, well my willingness to have help and get this done, misled all of us. Reality is it took us 6 weeks to go through laundry, kitchen, dining, living room and this room is as big as all of that area put together.
rock room is a room that was added on to the trailer so is a very large room that was full to the max with piles of stuff. So to think one week is unrealistic. I am starting to feel hope again, knowing you will understand what I am feeling. Thanks for your help through this stressful month
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Tillie
Posted: 05 February 2016 - 11:10 AM
Good Morning Everyone :)

Hi Tatoulia :)
Have fun with your snow. ;)

Hi CriticalMass :)
Thank you for stopping by and letting us know how you are doing.
Take care of yourself.
(((HUGS)))

Hi LR2014 :)
Good to hear you have been doing half of the self care things. :D
Now, listen carefully and you will hear my voice throughout the day encouraging you to drink more water and can you see me standing firm ordering you to get to bed on time?
;D

Hi Diane :)
Have your friends read
"Digging Out" or "Buried In Treasures"?
Since there is no therapist trained in helping with a hoarding disorder involved in this clean out, I worry about you.
I believe you need time between a whole room clean out to get used to the space. Time to process things before another big whole room clean out.
Not saying to stop all work, just maybe you need to do a smaller amount this next session.
Then when you are emotionally ready, clean the next whole room.

It takes time to get used to the "new".
There are thoughts to process, emotions to come to terms with.
I strongly believe that the talk therapy part of a major clear out is the most important part.
And it is the way that you learn skills that will serve you will throughout the rest of your life.

Not trying to talk you out of anything.
Just want you to connect with your inner self and try to communicate these things to your helpers.
It is your emotional wellbeing, more so than your physical surroundings that take priority.
(((HUGS)))

Today I am off to town to get some food.
Have my list all made up.
Now I just need to get dressed.

Till Later.... :)
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LR2014
Posted: 04 February 2016 - 11:08 PM
Hi Tillie, Tatoulia, Diane, Roxie, CriticalMass, Karl, Dave, Anonymoniker, ShedTheShame, Arggg, et al.

CM, sorry you are dealing with so much right now! Lots of hugs!

Yes, Tatoulia, I do believe I'll feel a big sense of accomplishment when that debris gets taken to the dump. There is still more of it to be picked up (lots more). I'm hoping to make a trip to the dump about once a month for the next few months. Diane, I used to love to tumble rocks. Haven't done that in a long time. (I loaned my tumbler to a young friend who then moved out of state, and I haven't "tumbled" since then.) Tillie, I definitely have been eating enough (probably too much) and wearing proper clothing/gear. Can't say that I'm staying as hydrated as I should, though, and the sleep part is so-so. Having just admitted that, I'll end this post right now, get my laundry out of the dryer, and then try to snooze! (It's past my bedtime.) Goodnight!
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Diane
Posted: 04 February 2016 - 10:40 PM
So great reading your posts. Tillie I was out burning in the yard today with you, did you see the smoke signals I sent your way. It was good advice to be kind to myself, difficult day, burning was my fun for the day, then rinsed the rocks I am tumbling, now will change the grit. Roxie, happy your did washing and shining. Tat, 5 mins. and dishes were done, we are so silly to agonize for hours. Then I was energized, cleaned counters, moved microwave to more convenient area. Thanks for your thinking about potential uses. I have had to stop myself many times today regretting letting go of potential uses. Even thought of driving to where my stuff might be to recover things, then it would just sit in a pile for another 4 years. What I can't figure out, is how can I let them haul bins and boxes of good stuff out, then the small things they told me to decide on, I shuffle around for hours unable to make a decision, then it is still cluttering the table. The thought comes to mind, just dump the whole pile and be done with it, the answer is you might need it, truth is can not find it when I need it. I have done this for years, can't decide so just shove it somewhere, to deal with later, later never comes, just another pile. Hopefully I will sleep better tonight and
tomorrow is a new day.
Just heard next Thursday is the next clean out day, they want to do another whole room like they did this one, I am terrified to let them in that room, they will get rid of so much more. She said the sooner the better so I don't talk myself out of it. I am thinking I need a few weeks to adjust to yesterdays cleanout, they have been right so far, I have to just trust I will survive this. I know you will be here for support
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CriticalMass
Posted: 04 February 2016 - 08:02 PM
Once again back with a quick check in; life has slammed our household with one thing after another. It may ease up some in the crises that have reached their peak and are on the downhill side. But there's another uncertainty, an elderly person with not much time left. My brain has been fried at times and I have felt a desire to run away just so I can think. But I can't, and I'll survive, and then when time permits I'll rest, regroup, and resume. In the meantime I'll touch base here when I can. Your posts have been inspiring and I'm proud of you all. :)
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CriticalMass
Posted: 04 February 2016 - 08:02 PM
Once again back with a quick check in; life has slammed our household with one thing after another. It may ease up some in the crises that have reached their peak and are on the downhill side. But there's another uncertainty, an elderly person with not much time left. My brain has been fried at times and I have felt a desire to run away just so I can think. But I can't, and I'll survive, and then when time permits I'll rest, regroup, and resume. In the meantime I'll touch base here when I can. Your posts have been inspiring and I'm proud of you all. :)
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Tatoulia
Posted: 04 February 2016 - 06:13 PM
Wow! Glad to hear from each of you.

LR, I am sure you will feel a great deal of accomplishment after going to the dump--there's something to be said for seeing the fruits of our labor--clear space! Keep it up!

Dear Roxie, how nice that we all have each other for motivation. Sometimes I stand in kitchen and say, it would take all of five minutes to empty dishwasher and refill it with the dishes in the sink. It's good for me to remind myself that some tasks truly only take a few minutes. And they generate the energy to wash down the sink, throw away garbage, etc, etc. amazing!

Diane--so proud of you. You are doing a great job. It's tough and it's painful, to be sure. One thing I've done to help me through this: If after getting rid of something I think, oh I could use that for (soap dish, empty wall in kitchen, place to hold my socks, you get the idea), I remind myself that just because I've now (posthumously) found a use for something doesn't mean I need it. If that makes any sense to you, perhaps you could try it. So, when I walk into bedroom tonight and say, if I hadn't donated that one thing, I could use it now. Yes, but the fact that I can now think of a use doesn't justify the fact it hid under my dresser for the past 18 years! And certainly doesn't mean I should have kept it.

Tillie we are expecting snow tonight--hard to believe when it's been so mild. Let's see if it sticks around or melts immediately!

Got to go make dinner and get some love from the kittycat.
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Tillie
Posted: 04 February 2016 - 03:16 PM
WOOHOO!!! Roxie :D
FANTASTIC job you have done there!


While I was outside watching the burn barrel burn, I did snow removal on the car.
Now it's all uncovered with the ice sickles removed too. :D
When my fingers got too cold I would go warm them by the fire.
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Roxie
Posted: 04 February 2016 - 01:27 PM
((((Tillie, LR, Tat, Diane))) and coffee clinks to all.

I was inspired by readng the posts that yesterday I hand washed the pile in the bathroom that's been there for weeks. Then I polished the faucets and started in on cleaning sinks and countertop. More to go, but thank you all for inspiration.

Think of you daily and appreciate each of you.
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Tillie
Posted: 04 February 2016 - 11:22 AM
Diane :D
(((HUGS)))
Be very kind and gentle to yourself.
Try not to worry about anything that's been removed.
Focus on what remains and your vision of your life as you want it to be.
I am so very, very proud of you for allowing and trusting your friends enough to help you through this difficult process.
I smile when I envision you working away in your special rock room, doing what you love.
(((HUGS)))
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Tillie
Posted: 04 February 2016 - 11:14 AM
Good Morning :)

Hi Tatoulia :)
You're welcome :D
WAY TO GO!!! for keeping on top of daily maintenance! :D
I believe that being in his hoard drains all the energy, motivation and any positivity out of my hoarder.
You can actually see the transformation in him.

Hi LR2014 :)
Little by little it will get done!
WAY TO GO!! for your organizing projects too! :D
Just remember to take care of yourself.
Eat, stay hydrated, rest and sleep enough, wear proper clothing and any necessary protective gear.
Write to us again when you get the chance. (((hugs)))

Just puttering around in here today.
Think that about noon I will go out and light the burn barrel.
Not a good day to hang out laundry. Not snowing but the sky is solid cloud cover keeping out the sunbeams.
Still brutally cold too.
Decided that tomorrow I will venture into town and get some groceries, so today I will write up a list.
The other day my lavender started to sprout. :D

Later... :D

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Diane
Posted: 04 February 2016 - 11:12 AM
Thanks for posting that you feel better when things are clean. I need to wash dishes, clean counters, take garbage out and trust I will feel better like you do. I get busy trying to figure out what to do with small items, and let dishes etc. go. Such a good reminder to take care of the things that matter, like dishes. Last month we got rid of more than half of dishes etc. in kitchen because I continued to let dirty dishes pile up. I still need to do them daily so dirty dishes don't scream, "see you really are a slob"
Happy you have a light bright house Tillie, cloudy here. It is such a miracle that the core group of gals has hung together, and now that I am ready to rejoin you, you have accepted me with open arms, thank you LR,Tat,Tillie Roxie, means so much
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Diane
Posted: 04 February 2016 - 11:05 AM
Tat, Tillie, LR so happy to read your posts this morning.
I had spent many hours over the past week, picking out the things I thought were necessary to keep. My two friends came in with guns blazing and shot holes in my plans of keeping stuff. They continued to bag/box up so much stuff. They filled a 4x8 utility trailer and 2 SUV's of donations and bags of garbage, stuff that I thought I needed. The big room is almost empty. I trust them both, and had to keep reminding myself I want freedom more than I want this stuff. Emotionally I was a wreck by the time they left. I only slept a few hours last night, kept waking up thinking about stuff they took to donate, very anxious, and had to remind myself this is normal for a hoarder to feel anxious when relinquishing control over stuff. I finally got up and have accomplished very little since I got up hours ago. I rifled through the "garbage" and took out "donations" and "keepers", noticed the mess I made, and asked myself can I let go of these things, I have to trust my friends want life to be better for me, not trying to take things from me. Very difficult morning for me. Thanks for all of your continued support
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LR2014
Posted: 03 February 2016 - 09:27 PM
Hadn't checked back here since I posted several days ago. (Have had lots going on this week.) When I checked the board a couple of hours ago, I saw . . .

Diane!!!!!!! Great to hear from you! Like others have said, I've been thinking about you! (How's the freezer doing?)

And, of course, hi to everyone else, too! (Lemonade clinks, Roxie.)

Tatoulia, I agree that life is easier when things are clearer. FYI, lately I've been organizing some things. It's amazing how much my spirits lifted after doing that little project!

Thanks, Tillie, Roxie, and Tat, for your comments and sentiments related to the storm situation. I got lots of work done out there this past weekend. I've made numerous piles of debris. If all goes according to my plans, I will probably load the piles of debris onto a trailer Friday evening and take it to the dump on Saturday. (The first Saturday of the month is free day at the dump.) I will still have a lot of debris to deal with later (i.e. after Saturday). As long as I get a little bit done at a time and keep at it, it will get done.
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Tatoulia
Posted: 03 February 2016 - 09:10 PM
It's 60 degrees here on the East coast today, Tillie, if you can believe it! Thank you for the beautiful visual of the snow and sunlight.

Here's something that I keep thinking about: my life is easier and I am less tired when my house is clearer. I've been working on keeping dishes out of sink and keeping laundry folded and out away. And my life is easier and I am less tired. I hope that holds true for you, Diane, and anyone else reading this.

This is a struggle and I am a work in progress. I need to keep the progress working in my direction.
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Tillie
Posted: 03 February 2016 - 11:02 AM
Good Morning Everybody :)

Hi Tatoulia :)
Sounds like you have a good solid plan for that area.
Now, you just need to find that special dresser.
Looking forward to following your progress on this project. :D

Hi Diane :)
(((BIG HUGS)))
We are with you today in spirit.
Keep your vision of your rock room front and center in your mind to help ease the anxiety.
Would be so wonderful for you to have this space to spend all your creative energy.
I know how much you love working with stone.
(((HUGS)))

Very, very cold here these last few days.
Hoping today the temps get better than yesterday's high of 22 degrees.
The sunshine reflecting off the blindingly white snow really lights up even the darkest corners inside the house.
There is mail in the mail box but I have not yet gotten up the courage to walk all the way out across the road to collect it.
Today I am going to pop some popcorn for the birds.

:) TTYS
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Tatoulia
Posted: 03 February 2016 - 08:46 AM
Holding your hand, Diane! Sounds like you are mentally prepared. And ready! Keep up the good work.
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Diane
Posted: 02 February 2016 - 10:54 PM
Tat and Tillie so great being greeted by you both. T&T, friends I feel I have known forever and like no time or distance since on here months ago, thank you both.
Today I got up at 6 and started on rock room, OMG what a challenge, good it is so bad, made me realize even more that I need to just let them bag stuff up. I spent most of the day going through bags of stuff I haven't looked at in years, picking out valuables I had to keep, by the end of the day, looking at the huge mess, I realize, no matter how much I want to keep stuff tomorrow when 2 women are here bagging up stuff, I have to just trust them and let them take stuff out of there, sure wish one or both of you were here to hold my hand T&T!! I am so nervous to have them both see the condition of room. So happy I have this board for support.
Tillie you always have such good advice/suggestions. Tat, so happy you are still on here and continue working on your home and give such good visual details so I can visualize your furniture and changes you are talking about.
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Tatoulia
Posted: 02 February 2016 - 05:18 PM
Great suggestions, Tillie! You are right, right, right. I need to clean out the area in front of the closet and then make a plan. Right now I have this large piece of furniture--Victorian hat stand with seat and mirror--that I've decided to get rid of and in exchange I'm trying to find a small vintage bow front dresser for that space. It will give me sime drawers and wall space for artwork and stop that area from piling up. And up. And up. Thank you for your tips--I need a plan.

Diane, how nice that you are able to find help and accept help. Hard to get those things. And at the same time! I was naturally pained to read your post but we all slide. The trick is to find your traction. Glad you are back. I have been fairly sporadic lately but have renewed energy and am glad to have my friends here.

Hello to everyone.
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Tillie
Posted: 02 February 2016 - 01:02 PM
HAPPY GROUNDHOG DAY! :D

Hi Tatoulia :)
Good luck and WTG! finding and packing up the Christmas items! :D
One suggestion for helping to keep stuff from piling up by the coat closet is to make a "system" that works easily for you.
It sounds like it's the first place you are when you come home so it may be things just get dropped there.
Maybe a hook to hang hang-able items?
Maybe a basket or bowl to collect small items/mail etc.?
Maybe a larger container to hold shopping until you are ready to put it away?
But you would also need to schedule time daily/weekly to put the things away.
Just suggestions, you have to find what really works for you and everybody is different. :)
Fantastic! progress you are making!!! :D
Keep up the great work and soon you will have this clutter all under control!


Hi Diane :)
So wonderful to read your posts!
So happy to read that you have a kind, gentle and understanding helper. (((HUGS)))
So excited to hear about your lapidary project.
What a wonderful treasure the other occupants left buried for you to find.
The areas you once had all the way you want them will be easier to declutter and clean this time.
Honest, it has not been all that long this time around.
We all understand how hard it is to make all those decisions, especially all alone.
Please always know that no matter what you are up to you are always in our thoughts and hearts and we accept you whatever way you are. (((HUGS)))

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