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What Are You Doing Today
   

Subclinical
Posted: 19 November 2022 - 10:26 PM
Good evening!

Time to read, but not really address everything. I had a good first day of the sale.

Road, good job on the music boxes.

My dad used to say "pig wings!" Instead of "b?- s?-"

So far I sold 9 of 26 pigs. My best year was 17 in two days. (I have sold other stuff too)

CM, good job on the pens!

I love the senior center for you! Also:🦡

Lila, I hope the event was ok.

The biscuits do freeze. Recipe soon.
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CriticalMass
Posted: 19 November 2022 - 02:21 PM
Lila, I knew SubC would be the person who could help you sort the veggies! I know that's not my strong suit, as I rarely eat any. I also can't toss candy or other carbs unless I hate the way they taste, which almost never happens. That's because it triggers rebellion in me from back when I used to go on strict diet regimens or try to. When some years back I read Martha Beck's book about the psychology of weight loss, The Four Day Win, I realized what was happening to me was I was setting off a scarcity mentality. But everyone's mileage will vary on what tactics work for them.

Today I just have a little thing to report - but it has to do with tangible physical object decluttering so I want to claim my small bragging rights so that I will reinforce the trend! I was looking for a pen and I found one that writes in turquoise but it skipped. I'd bought a bunch of these cheapo pens that were turquoise, lime green, hot pink, orange, purple, etc. at the Dollar Tree. Clip Clicks they're called. And I'd actually had okay luck with the Clip Clicks in the standard ink colors of black, blue, and red.

But these zany colors, I don't know if I just don't use them often enough and they dry up, or if the ink is of a different quality to begin with. Finally, I have acquired a reasonable supply of my favorite pen brand, Paper Mate Profile, which write in a nice thick stroke because I have a firm hand when I write and I loathe a thin line pen; they just don't seem to write darkly enough to suit my handwriting style and they feel funny, draggy on the paper. You know how we learn over time in this decluttering game that it's so much better to have a few good quality of whatever - pens, clothing pieces, dishes, etc. - than a zillion crappy cheap ones that just frustrate us.

So anyway, I decided to pull out the packs of the Clip Clicks that I realize I have been holding onto because of sunk cost fallacy, thinking oh, someday I'll use 'em up and then just not buy any more. NOPE. They need to go away. I don't need to be haunted by stupid cheap pens! And yet because some of them might be good but I haven't got the time or energy to test them, whoever buys them from the thrift store will either get some good out of them, or at least be more decisive about throwing them away.

My mother when I was growing up used to have a fountain pen that she used for most everything. I understand fountain pens are making a comeback; they're certainly more ecologically friendly. But I have ADHD and I lose things, so I dunno. It is bad how much plastic goes into crummy pens. But I can't fix the whole world right now. The Clip Clicks are out in my van with some other things to donate.

I do need a bit of BADGERING to get the donations to the thrift shop. Ladies...?
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Lila
Posted: 19 November 2022 - 12:43 PM
Thank you SubC! This will get me going. I forgot to mention radishes, but I will trim those and wash them and maybe bake them. I have had them roasted before and they taste good. I'll make myself a spinach smoothie today as well.

I have an event to go to today that I committed to before I knew how difficult it would be for me, but since there are only two of us in a specific role that needs two people, I have to go. I hope I am glad I went. I am pretty sure I can't even eat the food they serve since it will be meat and stuff I am allergic to. Praying it is worth going and when I get back I will say I am glad I went.

I will get started on the veggies, bake the squash, yes to the biscuit recipe please! I bet those would freeze well, have you tried it? Maybe they will become a Tot favorite! Then I will be gone to the event for a few hours. I have to work tomorrow morning also, but then I have the entire week of Thanksgiving off. I am glad about that.

I'll be back to see how everyone is doing today!
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Subclinical
Posted: 19 November 2022 - 05:12 AM
Thanks for keeping the lights on!

I will have more to say later, but for now I am just having a little coffee before I get moving - day one of the sale - and I want to get Lila started.

Lila, it is probably not as bad as it feels. You just had your babies over for dinner!

Spinach goes bad first - salad, smoothies, use in a sandwich instead of lettuce.

I don't like collard greens.

Slice the cabbage in one inch slices and follow any recipe for roasted Brussels sprouts. I like walnuts and a little maple syrup.

Carmelize the onions and freeze them on a baking sheet. Break them up and bag them and keep them in your freezer to use for soups or any recipe that starts with "brown onions"

Bake the spaghetti squash and pumpkins, scoop them out, mash and freeze. I will give you Bean's biscuit recipe if you want.

Just start baking and eating the spaghetti squash.

Turn your heat down a little - it will save money and veggies.

Good job on the candy!
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Lila
Posted: 18 November 2022 - 09:53 PM
post 2 Friday night -

After I posted, I gathered my strength and threw out the rest of the bag of candy I was eating. It's a step. Then I put in one load of laundry and swept up a small area in the family room. Now I'm tired. But at least I will have clean clothes in the morning. I literally ran out of clean clothing that fits me so putting the laundry is was something I really needed to do.

I would like your help with one task, please, anyone who can help and encourage me. Someone came over and gave me extra food. I do not know what to do with it. Please please tell me how to do something with each item before it rots - considering I am vegetarian, and it is just me and Son here eating. I already offered some of this food to neighbors and they declined. Here is what I have, and need to know how to either preserve it or use it somehow.

a ten pound bag of onions
several butternut suash
several spaghetti squash
several "sugar pie" small pumpkins
several cabbages
a very large bundle of collard greens
two huge bags of baby spinach

This is all really a blessing as I can't afford much food right now. Please help, this is overwhelming.

My garage is so cold anything left in there freezes at night. All areas of my house are so warm that even winter squashes don't keep for long (no cool area). I do have a large freezer. What to do with all of this, and how to preserve? I already made a huge pot of vegetable soup and froze most of it.
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Lila
Posted: 18 November 2022 - 09:29 PM
hello friends,

I was happy to just come here and read all your posts. I wish my memory was better, but I wanted to say things like, No More Brio Tracks at my house, I understand relationship issues and a grouchy hub but now my grouchy hub is grouching somewhere else and although in a weird way I miss him, I don't miss that. Sorry about the broken bowl... wondering why you are making pigs with wings... thinking about depression and clutter. And darkness and coldness, having a hard time prioritizing, and I'm glad the friend does not have a cancer recurring.

I am struggling. Cancer tests next week. I have been stress eating junk and throwing out rotting veggies which causes me a huge deal of shame. I think perhaps I just need to throw out the junk instead. How strange, really, that the junk will last for months in the cupboard but I MUST eat it, while the nice fresh produce does not last but I avoid it to eat the junk.

My no spend November is terrible.

My house is very bad. Everything is in chaos, I have many thinks that really have got to be done but I sit here lamenting and being scared to do any of it.

I don't know how to get out of this rut.
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CriticalMass
Posted: 18 November 2022 - 06:01 PM
This is just a small hello 👋 roommate is out of town and I'm holding down the fort. I made a fall themed cake earlier and decorated it - it's on Instagram @BunnyPlanetQueen if you want to see it.

She's only going to be away until tomorrow night so I'm not going to attempt any big projects, plus I'm tired. There have been some taxing things and I'll just need to see how it all shakes out. So I'm downshifting into relaxed mode. Bunnies, baking, sudoku, etc.

Here and there I have accomplished a little, though. Got some things done for the bunny group; we have our event on Sunday, so I got the newsletter finished and some miscellaneous.

My own computer work is coming along; I would love for it to be faster, but even with crazy days and delays I'm getting a lot more done than I have in a long time because this computer is blazing fast compared to the previous ones. And I started going through my jottings about what file directories I've cleaned up and transferred and which are still to be done, and I see definite progress. Should be able to wrap it up, at least the main phase of it, fairly soon.

The senior center is going to be another place where I can catch up on projects in an uncluttered environment. And the main one is near the library. I realize that at some point I'm still going to have to confront my physical mess here and at the storage unit. But having some wins with the computer is energizing and helps me feel less discouraged and more on top of things. Crafts are another thing I'll be able to work on at the senior center.

They were holding a bazaar the day we signed up, which meant that the members had booths where they were selling garage sale miscellaneous and/or crafts. I've been wanting to have a garage sale for awhile, but had no place to have it. They hope to have another bazaar in April. That would give me a decluttering goal again and a happy one at that. A carrot 🥕 rather than a stick.
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Road
Posted: 18 November 2022 - 01:27 PM
** that was supposed to say subc, not sync. Is there a way to add exceptions to autocorrect?! If I ever find the jackass millennials responsible for the programming that's always turning innocent words into embarrassing words I am going to kick them in the bidoobies.

Nice that your work event ticked off some boxes for you professionally *and* socially. Also, the thought of someone making ceramic "when pigs fly" things makes me very happy indeed. The fact that it's you doing it is Icing on the cake. It's a pet visual of mine. i fact, I Have actually considered a flying pig as a logo.

Lila and Tatoulia, how goes allthe things? Hi to anyone else listening. 💕
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Road
Posted: 18 November 2022 - 01:03 PM
Hey all,

Sync, sorry to hear about your daugh's job. CM, amazing news with your friend's health scare.

Had two funny hoarding related things just happen. Someone posted in another group a link to a lecture and as I was listening to her describing the number of people for whom things start in childhood I opened a mystery bankers box and lo and behold my first hoard ever - stuffed animals I got when I was in the hospital at age 4. The only logic I can attribute to this bit of mystical juju is that since I was listening to a hoarding lecture it motivated me enough to go in the basement and open a few boxes. But considering the box was not out there by me and I haven't seen it for prob 10+ years and at the exact moment she invoked childhood trauma and onset of hoarding, I opened the essential example. My immediate thought was "garbage." Dusty, spidery, stained, faded. I can remember most of their names still. Now I'm kinda thinking bonfire would be suitable - except they're all probably toxic to burn. Don't get me wrong, I don't hate the things - just seeing them on one level like another person might - with little emotional attachment. and yet powerful - because that was the ignition point? Some pondering.

Other example is I brought up a box of music boxes. Decided one was warped sounding, two were like raw material projects and I've decided that I am no longer in the market for "this could be." I am totally fulfilled in the "creative maker" category of my life and have a zero track record over many decades of actually making anything out of a music box. Yes, the music is pretty, the works are fascinating. But I am "not that guy." If I want a music box I can buy a nice one. All these little rejects I picked up in thrift stores and garage sales can find their home elsewhere. (Hopefully not with another hoarder though.) I did keep two but when I walked into the living room to place them every available space for Christmas decorating was already taken. so I might still 86 them.

The thing I haven't mentioned yet is how Mr. Road came home in the middle of this and tried to retract several of the tee shirts of my sons I was getting rid of and took the still-boxed music boxes for his white elephant at work. He also picked one up and said "oh this is cute. I thought I knew your taste but I guess not." And I said "this is cute. This is my taste. The problem is I have a basement and garage full of things I really like." It's as if he has no memory of the endless fights. kinda weird.

Also cleaned up the other Easter basket (yes, from April), a spare pumpkin and put them where they go in the basement. As far as Christmas decorating goes I am done with what I can do besides the tree. Also if I find the garland for the mantle, I will take the time to put that up but everything else is really full. Any more and it just would be too much. It's already a little too much. But I still really want to do the trees.

But anyway, it's all good. I have breached the seal on the basement hoard and am making a little progress. I have confirmed that Mr. Road does indeed have a tiny issue with this too. but I think it's manageable. And I'm starting to have some hope about the basement and garage. Thankful for people who are further down the path setting an example and sharing their tips and progress to give the rest of us hope. 💗💕💖💞💓
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Subclinical
Posted: 18 November 2022 - 04:36 AM
Good morning!

Road, drop off the donate box!

I am exhausted an amped on adrenaline.

The staff social went really well last night in that everyone seemed to enjoy it and stayed much later than planned.

Not so well in that I didn't have time to do anything but demonstrate, help out chat, and clean up (thought I might finish glazing a thing or two) and that everyone stayed much later than planned.

I did enjoy parts of it and get to know some of my coworkers better.

Now I must try to finish getting ready for my sale and classes - car to load, items to tag, kiln in process of last firing (to go warm in the morning)

I started some laundry.

Will check in later.
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Road
Posted: 17 November 2022 - 02:17 PM
Hey guys, looks like some stuff went down here so I will come back after I read up.

Got through this morning which is good. (My sons IEP) Like last year I ended up coping with all the PTSD triggers by ignoring the existence of the meeting until I was in the meeting. It's one way to handle it.

Then I stressed out remembering all the dumb stuff I said and was annoyed that I didn't prepare at all. Then I became productive, Fed the doggies, set up the Christmas houses and reworked all the extension cords, etc. I also moved one of the garlands, Dusted as I went along, and other assorted holiday decorating. Then I cleaned the bins out of the way, and swept the floor so it looked clean when you walk in. I still have to figure out the tree situation. Hoping Mr. Road is motivated to decorate outside or that will probably be a "pass" for this year. Not stressed about it at all - I am in the mood to decorate all the things this year... but I know I have a window of tolerance for it and it will close at some point. My goal is to make each future session as self-contained as possible So I don't end up with a big mess when I've run out of energy to deal with it.

Hosting thanks giving next week. Now that it's staring me down I am very glad Ive already done some deep cleaning in the kitchen & bathroom. I still have two fridge shelves to clean. Maybe I will do that tomorrow.

Ooh, and I also added a few more things to the donate box (which is now overflowing). A couple stray de-hoarding notes... one is a site where you sell your books. I thought this might be a good bridge between selling books one by one on eBay (Which would not really be fast/efficient enough - and outright donating them. I probably have several hundred I need to unload. Another idea I had was to buy the large clear garbage bags for donating soft things like clothes and blankets, etc. I guess it was more exciting in my head.

Well, the kid will be home soon so I should probably run.

Will try to come back later,
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Subclinical
Posted: 16 November 2022 - 09:42 PM
CM, I'm glad your roommate is ok. And good for you guys trying new things!

I miss tillie too.

Tatoulia, I know she will be ok, and I know she will find a new job. The important thing was the moving. She really needed to change her life. Denver is so much better for her.

I only fired four pots tonight. Two broke, and one was so bad I put it back to refire. But the fourth one is really cool.

Got a new student today.
I am in charge of the staff social event after school tomorrow.

Still just doing the best that I can.
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CriticalMass
Posted: 16 November 2022 - 07:00 PM
Evening ladies. (It sure does get dark awfully quickly - and I believe I'm at the southernmost latitude of any of us here - dear Tillie was further south, golly I miss her...)

Anyway, the promised update about the thing that had me worried and preoccupied - and it's good. 👍 My roommate went to her doctor today, and the odd thing she had noticed on her neck awhile back was not a recurrence of cancer but merely scar tissue from the surgery of a couple years ago. Big sigh of relief.

There have been some other stresses. I'll wait to decide if, what, or how much I want to say about those - and there could be a mitigating development. It's nothing health related, at least.

Meanwhile, just getting my feet under me, working on accomplishing little things. Roommate and I joined the community senior center, which has some good resources and activities to offer. We're each trying to break out of the ruts that are easy for homebody introverts to fall into and which can plunge a person into the winter doldrums. (Along those lines, I've already started my countdown on the calendar towards the solstice - today is almost over, so as of tomorrow only 34 days to go).

This autumn has just been intense. I much prefer boring.
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Tatoulia
Posted: 16 November 2022 - 07:02 AM
Oh no! Your poor daughter! I'm so sorry!

I like the sweet exchange of you texting your husband, he calls her, and then they talk.

There are a lot of jobs right now and your daughter will find something. This is a terrible shame, especially since this was a big move for her.

I have to head to office.

My friend at work calls me piggy and I call her cow. Sometimes she leaves me voice mails where she moos or oinks. When I was promoted, she congratulated me with flowers and the card read something about being in charge of the pigsty. So naturally I'm intrigued by your pigs!
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Subclinical
Posted: 15 November 2022 - 09:12 PM
Thanks Tatoulia,

It helps just to be able to tell someone I believe will care.

I did ok today. I put the pottery in the baking soda. I did eat some candy. My classes went well. I took a shoebox full of consumables to my classroom.

Dh is still depressed and miserable, but at least he is not taking it out on me tonight. (By which I mean, being grumpy and negative and unappreciative and generally pissy about everything - he would never be even verbally abusive)

I have one glazed bowl and 14 pigs in the kiln. I have 12 more pigs with their wings glazed, but I don't know how many will actually make it into the kiln. I just don't have enough time!

My Dd in Denver got fired. She called me sobbing. Then Dh tried to call me while we were talking, and I texted him what happened. Then she said "I need to go. Dad is trying to call me. I'd rather talk to him." (I am grateful, not jealous) he says she will be ok.

I feel like I should be worried about her, but I have been worried about her for so long the well is empty. I believe she will be ok.

Teaching tomorrow, and the class I'm taking. That is enough for one day!
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Tatoulia
Posted: 15 November 2022 - 07:46 PM
SubC, I am so sorry! I truly am. I hope your husband has lightened up. Relationships are hard, for sure.

I'm sorry that you are having a hard time. I wish there were something I could do to help you. You are doing a great job, accomplishing a lot, and are an inspiration to people young and old. Please don't be mad at yourself or your husband.

Sending you love and warmth from cold Boston.
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Subclinical
Posted: 15 November 2022 - 04:39 AM
Good morning.

Guys, I am still feeling really discouraged. I didn't do my glazing last night because Dh was just so awful to be around. I went to bed. But I'm not feeling rested.

This is when I make bad decisions. I'm trying really hard to not make bad decisions. I need to go out to the studio and fill a trash can with baking soda saturate and soak some pottery. I need to do that right now. Actually, I need to do that 15 minutes ago.

It's so cold outside.

I went to Costco with Dd to buy the baking soda yesterday. (She has a membership) I ended up spending $50! I bought the baking soda, and naan and babaganouch (sp?) for an easy dinner, and naan for her, and two kinds of juice for Dh, who barely acknowledged it, and a giant bag of chocolate chips.

Being in Costco was horrible and overwhelming.

Ok, my secret trick to doing the things I don't want to do is to break them down. Last night chores were so hard that at one point I was just chanting "keep walking" in my head.

So, steps one and two - post and put down the computer.
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Subclinical
Posted: 14 November 2022 - 07:51 PM
Tired. Having trouble prioritizing. Dropping balls. Struggling with decisions.

Dh is grumpy and unpleasant to be around because of work. I hate that most of all.
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Subclinical
Posted: 14 November 2022 - 12:17 PM
Road, it sounds like you are doing a good job and making progress!

I hope that your brother gets the job and your stomach issues settle down. Weight loss can help with that too, so good luck! It sounds like a lot of progress!

Bean and I took the cushions off the couch to build a fort and Bean looked at me in horror. Vacuuming ensued.

I did most of the dishes from last night and I have laundry going.

A bowl got wrecked in the kiln because I didn't do a maintenance job I knew I needed to do - I just thought "it will be ok." It was not ok. Sigh.

Somehow I still feel like I am making progress though.

Glaze work to do while Bean naps, so off I go...
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Road
Posted: 14 November 2022 - 06:06 AM
Oh rotten fish guts... I just lost a long post and not three minutes after remembering The frustration Saturday when I tried to get my brother to screen shot or copy and paste his responses in the online job application he was working on that he kept losing. He didn't listen to me and then lost another hours work which resulted in me having to witness a 59 year old man having a major melt down. And then predictably, my iPad died and I lost my post.

So I'll start My Monday Morning Post 2.0 with my brother. Learned of job opp a week ago Thursday. Told him about it the same day. He was excited about it, hopeful. This is same job he had a crack at months ago but blew off applying for it. I told my friend if it ever came up again, I would make him apply or do it myself. So I am checking in with him, pushing, and then nagging over the course of a week to get him going. During this time I am sick For a few days, and am helping MIL with her drs. Appts and have drs. Appts of my own, and really can't help... but I am checking in, trying to remind him why this is a good thing... all this time he's ramping up the excuses and the delays... finally This past Thursday I get over there and we get the app done. He blows off submitting the resume and cover letter despite my advice. Then Next day (predictably) she says the app came through but no resume. So Friday night I get him to buckle down on the resume. Turns out all the time he's been claiming to be working on it, he actually has 0.0% done because all he's been doing is looking for his old one which is no where to be found. Which also means the whole time he's been unemployed and saying he can't do things because he's working on job search stuff he's been 100% fos. Ugh, my delusional reflection in him is truly an ugly sight. We had a talk. It was tense. But we got through it. Then Saturday am we reconvened and finished it and a workable cover letter and got it submitted. Last night my parents invited themselves over and once again offered to pay for dinner and I ended up with a $60 take out bill and they gave me $20. Meanwhile, they continue paying my bills and mortgages for my two siblings. Was it something I said? My bro came over and I realized I was avoiding eye contact with him I was so stressed out with him from the last week. But it will be ok. I got him over the hump and if he doesn't get this job it will At least be easier helping him tweak his resume for other Jobs moving forward. I left this experience full of motivation never to be full of $#/+ or delusional again myself.

Actually, maybe this is why I was on a cleaning/organizing binge this weekend. I have much to report on that account however I may have used up my fingers on complaining again about my sibs.

I just heard Mr. Road downstairs barfing. He said he thinks he has the flu and already called in sick which he never does. Ugh oh...

Oh, before I forget I was gonna mention something about BRIO as it relates to my hoarding issues... and also say I too am a health-food-foodie and a semi closeted Doritos and donut appreciator.

BRIO - when. My sister was a young mom and I was still a teenager we would go around to yard sales and thrift stores and I saw her getting buzzed from finding BRIO track here and there... I mean, I basically learned the craft of hoarding in the shadow of a BRIO bridge. Haha Well, funny not funny. When I was pregnant with my son, and we had just bought our house those memories of her shopping for higher end things on a budget served as a foundation for a growing addiction to garage sales and thrifting to feather the nest. 20 years later the garage and basement are fully hoarded, a couple of mice and chipmunk families have come and gone, my marriage has been damaged repeatedly, and I've lived in a room with a foot of garbage on the floor and gone for days without showers or clean clothes (possibly for several years - I'm not actually sure). So I formally flip the bird to BRIO. Omg I do ramble.

I wrote more about my health in post 1.0 but the jist (is jist not a word?) I really had to fight for that. The jist is doc thinks I have GERD (actually was already diagnosed I guess due to night time coughing fits/asthma) and it seems to have gotten bad enough to lead to these esophageal spasm attacks that have been knocking me out. They build over a number of hours to a point where it's so painful and pressure is so great you can't talk or walk or breathe normally. Really no fun. And almost all of them have been followed by a second attack a few hours later. They also cause me to take a bunch of ant acids, anti gas, stuff for pain, allergy pills, and muscle relaxants which are probably all hard on my kidneys and have other lingering effects. So I'm just taking omeprazole for a few weeks and we will go from there. This adds another layer of food restrictions to my already pretty restricted diet so I'm pretty annoyed. I will say on the whole since I got diagnosed in April w the ckd, I dramatically changed a number of habits, and lost 25 lbs. partly from stress, and partly from being more cautious... this brings me to my wide eyed reading of sub c saying she usually sits on the floor. If I have to get down to the floor it's an official project... and getting back up? Look out - you're gonna hear some swears. But honestly, I have been so surprised how much losing 25 lbs. - even with 80/100 more to lose - Can change your functioning level. There were times I have had to use my arms holding the rails to pull myself up the stairs. And of course I was avoiding stairs... I still avoid them, but less. I really think I have gone down a size. I am shorter in the car because. My butt is less padded. My boobs have fallen even more because there is less belly holding them up. (This was not a fun discovery)... but anyway. There were other little things too like crossing my legs again, and holding my hands clasped ? I guess because my fingers got slightly thinner and I could? Weird.

Oh this is horribly long. I do apologize.

So this is what I did over the week cleaning/organizing:
- packed up Halloween decorations (3 bins)
- countless loads of laundry - sheets, towels, clothes, stuff to be donated, blankets, etc.
- gosh what did I do?
- started buying stuff for thanksgiving
- started decorating for Christmas. Mantle phase 1 is done. Started setting up set of houses we've had for years but never set up. Took a while to unpack and figure out the electrical cords and where to set them up... in progress...
- cleaned out bathroom cabinet downstairs. Cleaned out sink, washed some of the floor/toilet, decorated for Christmas, fixed a picture frame, folded towels, tried new basket situation (abandoned new basket situation), fixed the wax melted and worked on a candle... projects still to tackle - hole in wall from door knob, wash or repaint wall that has marks from laundry hamper and son sneak eating ice cream sandwiches in there and smearing chocolate all over the walls... and the floor under the sink way back is really bad. No one can see it but might be nice to clean once every 5 years.
- Also cleaned out upstairs bathroom cabinet.
- cleaned off standing desk again
-

Oh my goodness I was on my feet working all day yesterday but I am out of time and out of memories!

Over and out people! Have a great Monday. Will come back and blather more later if I can.
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Subclinical
Posted: 13 November 2022 - 08:18 PM
Good evening!

Good to see so many people back! I hope road is doing well.

CM, you can insist that the rabbit work be scheduled around you. You are more important than the rabbits. Food, rest, sanitation, exercise, and I think in your case also church. Then rabbits. If they can't find so done else, they will just have to settle for what they can get. Treat yourself the way you would treat a friend you care about.

I'm glad your new computer is treating you well!

Tatoulia, I have a feeling that your job would be a lot less interesting if I actually knew what it was. But if not, maybe some day you will get a chance to tell me.

I hope dinner with your brother is good.

Lila, I am sorry about teen. I hope you enjoyed your group.

I got my first set of ornaments glazed and ready for the kiln, and the second set is fired and cooling. Dd and dsil came by tonight and made us dinner, and Bean is bathed, tucked in, and sleeping. The kids just left, so I need to get out and do my chores so I don't stay up too late. While I was in the studio today I tossed a couple more things I was never going to finish into the scrap bucket. Progress I guess?
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Lila
Posted: 13 November 2022 - 06:19 PM
Tatoulia, nice dream about cleaning and decluttering! Sounds like a positive dream with simple meaning. I dreamed that my pastor was killing somebody by spraying her with a power washer that was cutting her in two. It was horrible, what the heck is that about?? I like my pastor...

I enjoyed reading all the updates today! And glad someone is reading mine. I had church this morning and then came home and Teen called and screamed at me on the phone (which they did yesterday and I hung up on them then). Today I tried to talk reason and listen but there is no rason with them so I let it go. It is very, very hard not to take that personally.

Aside from that, I got a coupon for home delivery of food, which is always a bad idea (but a great deal) so now I am full of crap food.

I had a wonderful time with Tot and the growing Acorn last night! I cooked an actual meal and we had a nice visit.

Today I have not done a lot, just a few phone calls and many texts and cleaned up my dog's puke, which I don't know why he puked, ugh, I hope he will be okay. I have a social group tonight I am going to that I will enjoy although "an object at rest tends to stay at rest" and if I was not going I would sit on this sofa til bedtime.
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Tatoulia
Posted: 13 November 2022 - 11:27 AM
CM! I'm sorry for the struggle yet grateful to hear from you! I don't drive in the dark anymore. I stopped before I needed to. Highway driving is easy for me but the city driving with all the pedestrians and bicyclists is difficult. I am so fortunate to live where there is good public transportation. Everyone maligns our transportation system, naturally, but I think it's wonderful.

SubC if we find a way to speak privately, I'll let you know what I do for a living but I suspect you like having the mystery.

I dreamt about cleaning out stuff last night. My hoards and other people's. My character was even laughing about how much easier it is to clear other people's stuff. I think 5his means I need to get my act together here. Also I'm pretty pumped about hazardous waste day on Saturday.

It's dark and rainy here today. I don't feel like doing a thing. I just emailed my brother to see if he wants to go to dinner. It will be our first time eating together in more than four years. I have no idea what we will talk about. BF said I can take his car but I'll prefer the bus.

Have a good day, everyone! Be careful of the ice, CM.
Have to get over to mom's with some cat litter and change the little one's box. I also have some blouses to return.
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CriticalMass
Posted: 13 November 2022 - 08:56 AM
I'm missing you ladies in my strange self imposed exile. 🥺 But later this week, I will know the outcome of the thing that I didn't feel like getting into until I knew more. And already it seems to be trending toward the hopeful. Either way, I'm going to break the silence.

This month has been hard in other ways too. Unexpected financial matters yet again, logistical hassles, and November is just never my best month, so I'm trying to figure out strategies to boost my mood and feel more hopeful.

It seems like life keeps throwing obstacles in the path of my efforts, though. Like, I was determined to get back into some exercise routine in this coming week, then yesterday the gal from the rabbit shelter insisted that we needed to schedule two days for doing their toenail trims. Which I agree is necessary but the timing was not good.

With the days so short now and me not accustomed yet to night driving especially through downtown which this would be, I ended up sacrificing two mornings - and I'd planned to go to the gym in the mornings so that it'd be daylight and not during the midafternoon school letting out and shift workers getting off work traffic which is of course the prelude to rush hour itself. Damned agoraphobia has been pesky lately and ironically I know a lot of the reason for that is lack of exercise and endorphins! Talk about a Catch-22! 🙄

Well, maybe I can go walking with my roommate when she takes her dog. It would be something at least.

Clutter clearing has been at a snail's pace still, but the times I get something entered in from one of my little scraps of scribbled notes and can discard the scrap, is very gratifying. My computer is so responsive and quick to boot up at a moment's notice, and doesn't crash or lag, which makes all this process delightfully easier.
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Subclinical
Posted: 13 November 2022 - 07:08 AM
Tatoulia, I'd love to show you, but I have no idea how.

Sometimes they put photos up on Instagram or Facebook during the sale. If the pigs make it, I'll try to post how to look.

I'm sorry about mom and the stealing. It doesn't help her to reinforce her delusions! Hopefully your sister will stop.

I am fascinated by your mystery job - lol!

I don't know what I will get up to today - still trying to pack too much in every day, but also starting to have a sense of progress.

(Which usually means I've dropped a ball and can't se it rolling toward the cliff...)

But maybe this time will be different. I'm always hopeful. It's good that Dh is home because it's cold and dark and damp outside with lumps of snow falling from the trees from yesterday. - temp dropping again so the ground will be ice by nightfall.
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Tatoulia
Posted: 12 November 2022 - 08:31 PM
I would love to see a picture of the pigs, SubC. I have a friend who calls me pig. I call her cow. It's ridiculous.

Busy couple of days. Spending time with BF. Yesterday we went with friends and their kids to the MFA, which has become something of a Veterans' Day ritual for us. But this year BF could join us. Then last night we went to a play with some of BF's friends. Today started harshly because not only did mom accuse me of stealing while she was at breakfast, my sister reinforced my thievery and said she would give me a stern talking-to. I told mom that I didn't steal a thing from her which then she said, then where did you put my stuff. The only time I could get her to believe that I didn't lie in wait for her to go to breakfast was when I told her, I'm not even up early. I've been late to work every day of my life. Every day. And then she backed off a bit.

Turns out she thought I stole the handle to open the recliner. No, the recliner doesn't have a handles it's electric and you press a button. So this is where we are now. I did tell my sister to cut it out.

I did two loads of laundry today. BF and I went to the cemetery to clean off our friends's graves and just walk around. Then we did a little bit of grocery shopping and stopped by mom's.

Lila, you are getting a lot done. The picking up of the poop sounds terrible. (Says the person who cleans litter boxes three times a week). I'm glad you found a way to resist dumpster diving. And good work today, SubC! Important to resist!

I have a lot to do tomorrow. I can't believe it's Sunday already. My mind is in Thanksgiving mode. I have two big presentations at work next week and it's hard because my new manager isn't invested in me or my work. But she'll get there. She's smart and competent. My work is a bit off the beaten path and I think she has trouble relating to what I and my unit do.



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Subclinical
Posted: 12 November 2022 - 07:09 PM
Hi Lila!

I've been enjoying the Lila show, but haven't had time to post. I've been making flying pig ornaments and throwing pots.

You've been doing really well. I hope you're getting rewarded with some fun time with tot and acorn!

The yard sounds like an awful job! I'm glad some of it was one and done.

Teen is wearing something. Unless you can get identical duplicates of whatever that is, I wouldn't buy more clothes. If there are options that fit, just keep offering the selection.

Today was that take away day. I didn't go. Not just because Dh was home, but because it was cold and wet and snowy and I didn't want to drive. And also because making my pigs was more important to me.

Good choices.
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Lila
Posted: 12 November 2022 - 03:59 PM
The Lila show, episode 3...

I dragged myself outside in the cold and scooped up a whole bucket full of dog poo from the yard. Bagged it and put it in the bin. Then played with the dog.

Then came inside and ate pizza. And then went back outside, gathered up a plastic crate, 3 bins, a set of dog stairs, a trash can, a couple of lids and a stepstool that had been left outside a few months ago. Hooked up the hose, sprayed all of it with cleaner and then the hose. Relatively clean. Let them drip a bit, wiped them off with a towel and dragged everything into the house. Much of this belongs to ex, and I will ask Son to stick them in his storage space (he still has things here). I feel good that I got that done, but now I feel so tired and wonder if I will get anything else done today.

Tot and family will be here in 4 hours. I really have to get the table cleaned off.
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Lila
Posted: 12 November 2022 - 01:44 PM
post 2 today. I am still quite sluggish to the point I made a second cup of coffee, with caffeine - a rare thing for me. I am sipping it now.

It is almost lunchtime and here is what I did since the last post:
- found a plastic bin with just towels in it, put them elsewhere, and brought the empty bin into Teen's room
- a very depressing time picking up tons of clean clothes off Teen's floor, shaking them out, sorting them. I washed all of them some time age for them, but they just got thrown on the floor and I was told nothing fits (not true) and they hate all the clothes (which they picked out and I paid for). I folded a few things I know they won't wear and put them in the bin. I am unsure what to do with the rest, as I cannot afford to keep buying and donating all their clothes. But I don't know what they actually WILL wear. Sigh. Need to go back in and bin some more things I guess. But all the shirts are wrinkled so I may throw them all into the wash, again. Tiring. And I miss Teen before they were like this.
- picked up some trash and put into a bag to take out
- brought a few things upstairs that belong up here

I dunno, it feels like I am going in circles. Also, Teen and addict friend drew a depressing, terrible mural on the wall with black waterproof makeup. I tried to see if it would come off with a couple different cleaners, just now. No luck, will try dawn power spray. The whole situation makes me so sad. I am trying not to sink into it.

I also got some meat out of the freezer to thaw for dinner tonight and will get it in the oven soon. And gave the dog a bone so he won't be too bored.
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Lila
Posted: 12 November 2022 - 11:43 AM
SubC, awww, you are making a difference in those lives! How wonderful!

I 100% understand the Brio tracks. Just thinking about it makes ME want to climb into the dumpster, lol. But here is something that helps me in those situations. There have been times I threw away things that looked good and salvageable, but threw them out because 1) they got dropped into a dirty toilet by a child, 2) a child vomited on them, or 3) they made me sad because of a very bad memory. So now when I see things thrown out, I think, well, they threw them out for a reason and it is probably gross. I don't want the germs or grossness or the bad energy in my house. That helps me.

Your routine sounds reasonable. I remember when I was super depressed I would go 5-7 days without a shower. I still washed my face and put on deoderant but did not go out much. Now that I have friends and a job and community, and am not super depressed, I don't do that. But, when I have a day off, I skip the shower sometimes. Like yesterday. I plan to shower tonight so I am ready for work in the morning.

I am struggling with energy today. I am also feeling the stark emptiness of my home after decades of living with lots of kids, a husband, sometimes a friend or boarder. Now, everyone is gone but Son, and he works. It is so quiet, it makes me want to cry. I miss having lots of children or teens. I play music or leave the tv on all the time. I am having my Tots over tonight for dinner and that will help.

My low energy would allow me to literally sit on the couch all day and do nothing, but I am fighting it and just made some regular coffee to help.

So far all I have done is:
- scrubbed, soaked, scrubbed again the pan from the bottom of the toaster oven
- basically nothing else but feed dogs and let them out

I hope after the coffee I can get some work done, while relaxing.

How are you today SubC, and other friends?

Anyone new lurking?
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Subclinical
Posted: 12 November 2022 - 06:26 AM
Lila, you got a lot done!

I hope you also feel more relaxed!

This is my work "grooming" routine:
Shower, shave as needed, deodorant, brush teeth, brush and braid hair.
Jeans without holes, school t-shirt, necklace.
Earrings for special days (theme days - I have a bunch of fun earrings like frogs and pumpkins) and socks and an open men's flannel shirt for cold ones.

When Dh and I go out I wear fancy clothes and jewelry and put my hair up.

Today I am going to focus on finishing all the clay making for my class this week and the sale this coming weekend (ack!)

Tomorrow I switch to glazing.

One of my seniors told me they considered having me speak at graduation at the senior meeting (this is considered an honor and as far as I know I have never been suggested before) I'm pretty sure I got a deer in the headlights look and I told him "nobody would enjoy that but you." (I am very clear with my kids that talking to their parents causes me anxiety. They know I try to hide when teachers have to go up front to be thanked or introduced in assemblies..) he laughed and said "don't worry, I said we *considered* it." Then the group wanted reassurance that I was coming to graduation. I told them I will sit in the audience and cry.

I took a feed bag of garbage from the studio to the dumpster yesterday, and I was able to easily find samples of all three types of fiber that I have on hand to share with my classes (we are discussing fiber production animals and related small scale homesteading skills) I managed to find my enthusiasm too, and came up with great lessons.

And I already know what I'm going to do next week!

The dumpster had been emptied and someone from the neighborhood had thrown a bunch of toys into it. I could see pieces of brio train track! But they were all the way at the bottom and wet from the rain. I did not climb into the dumpster and rescue them. It was a struggle. But I resisted. If they had been dry, or not in the bottom, or not behind my school - I might have given in. They are still in my head.
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Lila
Posted: 11 November 2022 - 05:15 PM
post 2 today -for accountability

I am enjoying my peaceful day! My Tots and family are coming for dinner tomorrow, so that gives me inspiration to get the kitchen table cleaned off and the kitchen decent.

So far I:
- sorted all the mail piles, threw out quite a bit
- heated up some soup and ate it
- hand washed the dishes, put a few away
- folded a basket of towels and put them away
- picked up all the dirty laundry and put it into the basket
- put some of Tot's toy set into a new box and threw the old broken box away
- put away random items from the kitchen table and other areas
- sorted all the pills, consolidated, threw out about 10 bottles
- put rust remover on the can opener blades and scrubbed them

I got a lot done while relaxing! I plan to clean up the kitchen and my bathroom a bit more, but that's about it for today, I think.

Oh, I also checked the balance on 2 gift cards, and it was 0, so I tossed them. I have this thing about wanting to keep empty gift cards so kids can play with them but seriously I need to stop.
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Lila
Posted: 11 November 2022 - 10:59 AM
Good morning everyone! SubC, I wish I could sit on the floor and work on things in a blanket nest! That sounds so inviting and comfy. When I sit on the floor, number one I cannot get back up easily (weight and knee problems) and number two my legs go numb and my back hurts (weakness and weight, I am sure). That would be a fun goal for me: get strong enough and light enough that I can sit on the floor and do things, most importantly, play with Tot.

I slept in, got up and made a nice pot of coffee with filtered water and beans I put in the grinder, fed dogs and let them out. I'm sipping coffee and watching Yes to the Dress.

So far I already:
- picked up dirty towels in the master bath and put them in the hamper
- put some trash items in a grocery bag and took it out to the trash can, along with a broken mop handle and a DONUT BOX (SubC my soul sister)
- brought in the mail
- loaded the dishwasher

That is a nice start and I did all this in a relaxed fashion while just wandering around doing my thing.

What I love about days off, aside from sleep and coffee, is that I just run a comb through my hair and don't fix it up "nice" and I don't wear makeup and I wear my loose baggy jeans and my old comfy favorite shirt that has some little holes in the sleeves. I have two in different colors and they are too ratty, really, to wear out, but I love them for home, until I find something to replace them.

Will be back with more updates as I get things done!
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Subclinical
Posted: 11 November 2022 - 04:39 AM
Welcome back Lila!

Rest is important! Be sure to put relaxing on that list!

It is raining.

I have a low folding Japanese table that I use for a desk/project table. I am a person who sits on the floor. The idea is that it can be set up in the main space or wherever and then folded up and slid under the couch in the den. It's a compromise with Dh. I have had it set up all week and it has my ornament project in process. I have created a blanket nest next to it to sit in. Mr. kitty came in soaking wet and plopped himself down in my blanket nest.

I guess I will have to clean it up. To me it looks inviting and calls me to come create, but to Dh it just looks like a mess.

I didn't tell you about my bad food choices yesterday (I've been making bad food choices all week, but yesterday was particularly bad. I went into the grocery store, and I started on the healthy side and put organic vegan soups into my cart. By the time I got to the other side, it was soda and clearance donuts. Guess which I ate for dinner? Hint, not soup.

This morning I am feeling very unprepared and unmotivated about my classes and I am having coffee and stale donuts for breakfast.

On the bright side, I also forgot to tell you that my pile of old magazines is down to 15. That's something..
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Lila
Posted: 10 November 2022 - 11:25 PM
omg, my brain hurts!!

I missed being here, sorry I missed my favorite show (the SubC show) and just now got on and read about half the older posts. It is night so I will read the other half in the morning.

I worked and worked and worked, drove for hours to see Teen who is still not home, could not see my Tots because they were sick. I have not had a real day off in a long time. Today I did as much work as I could, and I am taking off FOR REAL the next 2 days, going nowhere. I am too tired and my home is actually in chaos. Covered in dog hair, foam (long story), dirty dishes, dirty laundry and layers of dust and paperwork!!

I am so happy that tomorrow morniing I can sleep in, make a pot of fresh coffee instead of a keurig pod, and chill. Just stay home, do some things that need to be done, relax... ahhh. I really need this.

I am going to work on my planner a little before bed, so I have a decent list of what I'd like to get done over the next 2 days.

See you in the morning!
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Subclinical
Posted: 10 November 2022 - 08:26 PM
Good work Road. I hope your brother follows through.

You are seeing the shopping, so that is good.

I'm sorry about your flood. I know all too well that heart sinking feeling when you realize the problem is so much worse because you couldn't cope with the whatever.

Nothing new in today but two pieces of mail I left in the car - I think one junk, one cc statement (I pay that online, but the paper copy reminds me to do it). I made some more pig ornaments for the sale. I'll panic plan my classes in the morning.

My Dh is coming home! They can't do the thing anymore because of the hurricane. So may be he will have to go back, or maybe they will be able to do the rest of the thing with him here, but for now he is coming home!
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Road
Posted: 10 November 2022 - 04:15 PM
Little update. Dragged my brother over 2 miles of broken glass fielding petulant behavior and mild insults til we got his job app submitted. I found out he hadn't done his resume yet (after being unemployed for a year or two already but he couldn't bring himself to do that today so I will invite myself over there again tomorrow and try to get that done. If he gets past this hump he can navigate things - it's just this front end he can't handle. he's an exemplary employee but is so freaked by the application process. Anyhoo, so hope this job works out so he can get back on his feet again.

Must admit I was so stressed by that and a string of stressful events yesterday that I went to a thrift shop. (Like a junkie for a fix). I spent $20 and bought 4 vintage ornies to add to the hoard, several baskets which I ended up regretting, and some x stitch patterns and a book. Don't need any of it! Not in need of advice, just reporting the facts.

Good news is I cleaned out my car a little and took some returns to kohls before hand. I bought a couple tee shirts and a bday card for my niece, and a padding ton bear for my son. Didn't really need the tee shirts but some of the 2x I just bought are actually a little too big (what?!?!) also realized I have a similar paddington I forgot about, and I could have sent my niece a card from my stash. Oh well. Shopped for sofas and lamps which we need at the thrift but no luck. Actually found a pot of lamps I liked but I went over them with a fine tooth comb and found some damage. So that's no dice. (According to my thrifty rules).

Over and out.
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Road
Posted: 10 November 2022 - 07:32 AM
Hi,

Oh, that pic was just a test. If I can figure out how to do a few at once I'll try again.

(Long family related rant was here... )

Had a little emergency flood last night when the toilet overflowed. You hear a funny noise " oh that's not right..." and the next thing you know there's a .25" wall of water coming at your piles. These are the things you have to worry about when there's stuff that shouldn't be where it is. And always too much of it. Luckily I caught most of it in time.

Alrighty, I'm off to decide if I should go back to bed or something else...

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Subclinical
Posted: 10 November 2022 - 05:36 AM
Good morning!

I slept a little later than usual today, but I was up much too late last night.

I am struggling very hard with time management. It turns out being home alone is very little improvement. Although there are fewer dishes and my mornings are more organic.

Brought home pots from class last night. I'm not counting the pots. I'll have a look at the pot situation after the sale in two weeks.

Road, I hope things go well with your parents today.

Tatoulia, it's great that mom is showing interest in activities!

I have laundry running - because I don't have to worry about when Dh will get in the shower, and I did the dishes last night. I'm running the dishwasher every other day because I have a second milk bucket.

CM, I hope things are looking up, and Lila I miss you!
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Subclinical
Posted: 09 November 2022 - 09:58 PM
Super auick drive by - you took the trays off of your fridge door! Wow!

I hope your tummy feels better!
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Road
Posted: 09 November 2022 - 07:01 PM
https://www.dropbox.com/s/p95vxqvb565hobt/2022-10-02%2013.29.34.jpg?dl=0

...
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Road
Posted: 09 November 2022 - 06:59 PM
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Road
Posted: 09 November 2022 - 06:55 PM
The fridge is my friend

Hey all, trying again to share a photo...

Bit of a tough day. Had a doc appt. he thinks my issues are complications from GERD, so trying meds for that for month or less and go from there. Hope that's it and it's controllable without aggravating my kidney situation...

Felt kind of sick so wasn't up to much mentally. Got a barrage of calls from the MIL which was super annoying but I'm trying to let this be a practice in patience/spiritual growth. She needs help. I'm available. She has no one else and her own two sons are having a hard time taking care of her because she was so horrible to them.

Also dealing with my bro trying to get him to finish this application. I realize now that I'm unable to walk on eggshells with him that is the only way to coax him into doing it. This must be how people who tried to help us over the years have felt. Super frustrating I must say! The delusions and excuses are whoppers. And just ridiculous. He really has a totally distorted perception of what is required.

Lastly, the Ps are coming over Tomorrow to do a gardening project and I'm very worried how I will keep the out of the garage. It's the volume that is bad, as well as the fact that 90% of what they gave me 18 months ago is still piled up in the garage. When I say they I mean my dad cause my mom doesnt care about any material thing.

Wish me luck...
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Tatoulia
Posted: 09 November 2022 - 06:54 AM
Quick drive by. Tea clinks! Still not allowed coffee and I don't miss it.

I'm working on my house and am pleased with the progress. Small things make a big difference.

The last two weeks I've been going into the office on Tuesdays and Wednesdays instead of my usual Wednesdays and Fridays and I've liked it. Fridays are extremely boring at work. My new hire is doing great. He comes to the office when I am there even though he's only required to come in once a week. He's extremely quiet and hardworking. Im glad we have him.

The doctor added a medication to mom's roster and she's been doing fairly well! Sunday she was pretty upset, bordering on abusive with the workers. She was very mad at me because she thought I was going to visit her at 1:30 and BF and I got there at 4:30, and it was dark. So I said we were going to take her to the mall and she was mean and I clarified we are taking you now. So we wheeled her over to the Prudential Center and window shopped. We went into a paper store, where I bought her Christmas cards and a few other things she wanted. We had her out and about for an hour and 45 minutes and she's been in a better mood ever since. She hasn't been out of her place in ages, largely because I do not drive much and putting her wheelchair in and out of the car is too much for me.

The new med has calmed her nightly hallucinations. Her delusions (people talking about her, the aides calling her a dirty word, people being liars) are still in place. Last night, when BF and I stopped by to see her, she talked endlessly about her day and how great it was. She actually went to an apple tart demonstration and made her own, and she went to a music concert. Today, there are a few activities that she showed interest in. Flower arranging and painting on a ceramic mug. One of the residents said she'd pick up mom for that. Progress! She never goes to things downstairs.

That's the news from the couch. Fireplace on, kitty asleep next to me. I need to get ready for work.

CM, SubC, Road, Lila, and everyone else, I'm cheering you on!
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Subclinical
Posted: 08 November 2022 - 06:20 PM
Wow road,

I am still trying to find time and motivation to put thanksgiving stuff out.

I realized that I did clean up the Halloween stuff only a week after Halloween though. Except my big ghost - I washed that and hung it to dry, but it's probably ready now.

I'm sorry about your attacks. I hope the doc can help you.

As for your brother - I hope things work out for him. Please remember though that he is not your responsibility. That doesn't mean don't help him, it just means you can only do so much, and then you have to let go and leave things up to him.

I enjoyed the eclipse this morning, but I am also struggling with the short days, and the early dark. It's quarterpast seven and I want to go to bed. Also I need to eat. It seems like too much work. I have successfully cleared out most of the easy bad choices. It turns out that this means I have to cook, but I'm not hungry enough to want to cook.

I forgot my lunch, and then I came home and ate about a cup of cashews and a thick slice of tea bread.

Last night I had tea, crackers with cheese, and pickles.

I had my Green Day yesterday and today I took a big box of things to school to stay. Mostly consumables. I'm too tired to decide if today is yellow or green, but I think I did pretty well. Nothing new came home.
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Road
Posted: 08 November 2022 - 05:20 AM
Oh wow, a week escapes me just like that. Well, I had two more "attacks." Since the pre Halloween one and I actually made a drs. Appt this time. The last one was the worst so far and lasted two days. I had plans to take my son to my m&d who live all of 5 mins away and couldn't even go in I felt so bad. Luckily my mom offered to just take him and drop him off later so I went home and went to bed. The H was off work but was trying to fix the fence panels that got creamed in the latest storm so he was very annoyed that I was still sick. His brain is also broken. Good news is I slept four hours during the day yesterday and still slept all night last night. Woke up feeling better with no pain at all. If I didn't lose at least a pound from all that agony I will be miffed.

I am determined not to get depressed this winter. I am back to taking vit D & B although now I have to be a little careful with D I guess. I also have a light thingy and am going to try to do the 20 min walk in the sun every morning.

The H was encouraging to put up Christmas decorations early which I thought was interesting, or should I say dr. Hyde. But I guess what I really need to do is help my brother apply for a job. There's an opening through a friend of a friend situation. It's come up before and he blew it off and now they've gone through so many people they are hiring again and she actually thought of him for the job now and he can't get himself to apply. He has been well educated and mostly underemployed Over his career, and now unemployed. All his friends from high school are high achievers and I'm sure he's constantly comparing himself to them. Anyway, I told him about the job Thursday and he has yet to apply. I felt too sick Sunday and Monday to help him other than nag him via text. It's weird because when I mentioned it to him he jumped at it and you could tell he felt a huge sense of relief but then he couldn't even apply. His brain is also broken.

In getting ready for Halloween I already pulled the key Christmas bins out so that should be pretty easy. We still need a new tree. We keep inheriting trees that don't quite work and that is such a hassle. I'm pretty sure we finally dumped one but unless I wrote a big neon sign on the remaining trees I won't remember what state any of them are in, and let's face it, the secret hoarder (the H) probably put the one he was supposed to dump back in the garage. But anyway, if I do any decorating This week it will just be Mantle and a few other things in the living room. This is the 80%! Meaning this is the job that is fun, Lots of cute stuff that's been curated, dahling... takes only an hour or two and has the biggest impact. The tree is the 20. It takes 8 hours, the lights never turn out quite right, I end up with scratches everywhere... Over and out.
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Subclinical
Posted: 07 November 2022 - 01:05 PM
Hi CM,

Thanks for coming by!

I am wishing for you a settled and peaceful holiday season!

I forgot to confess yesterday that I brought home two multi page handouts about clay and a poster from the studio. I did recycle a large cardboard Halloween sign that I've had for a long time. I looked at it and thought "it is so hard to get this in my bin without bending it and it looks dated, and I hardly ever put it up, and it's literally printed cardboard.." And then I folded it up for the recycling really fast before I could think about it too much.

Enjoying Bean and a stretch of nice weather and working on a Green Day..
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CriticalMass
Posted: 07 November 2022 - 11:01 AM
Things are still up in the air for me, plus new struggles, but I'm doing my best to hang in. I just felt like saying Hi this morning. Pretty soon, like within a couple of weeks, I'll have info regarding the uncertain things (and one of them may turn out okay, but I need confirmation).

So anyway - Hi! Thinking of you all. Take care and be well. TTYL

Love, CM
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Subclinical
Posted: 06 November 2022 - 07:03 PM
It's the Subclinical show!

I got a lot done in my studio today. Unloaded the kiln (one pot cracked) trimmed another bowl, trimmed and burnished the 8 pots from yesterday, wedged some clay, rolled out and cut another slab bowl, and cleaned up a little more.

I also drove down to the big studio, put mica on 4 of the pots and set them up for bisque firing for class this week (Sunday night is the deadline), filled my car with gas, and bought cheese and milk for Bean (also gnocchi and pasta for me)

Took a shower, talked to Dh, set up the coffee, prepped the fruit for raisin bread tomorrow, and now I'm having a glass of wine and I'm going to make pig ornaments in my pajamas.

I'm calling today green because I have a sense of accomplishment even though I didn't even clean up my dishes in the house.
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Subclinical
Posted: 06 November 2022 - 07:50 AM
Good morning again!

I failed to sleep late, but I feel rested. Hopefully I won't have any trouble getting to sleep early tonight - tomorrow is a Bean day.

I made some coffee this morning, then went out to work in my studio until I got hungry - I'm continuing to work on cleaning up as I go.

Did chores - figured the critters were hungry too, and had some breakfast. I'm about to head back out to see if the kiln can be unloaded.

Hope everybody is having a good weekend!
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