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Hoarding Help Message Boards : The Daily Chat : What Are You Doing Today
                                           
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What Are You Doing Today
   

Tatoulia
Posted: 18 June 2022 - 10:15 PM
Ps I did go visit mom and brought her some groceries.
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Tatoulia
Posted: 18 June 2022 - 10:14 PM
SubC, you and husband made some wise choices today! What will you do with your old boots? And old lawnmower? Is there anyone who could use the old lawnmower?

I slept most of the day. Just recharging. The week was so fantastic and I needed to recharge.
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Subclinical
Posted: 18 June 2022 - 06:32 PM
(I want to add the information to the below post that Dh has been working really hard the last two weeks and got a bunch of overtime, and my boots needed to be replaced last year, but I've just been wearing them with mud leaking in because of covid - we don't usually make sudden big purchases)
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Subclinical
Posted: 18 June 2022 - 06:28 PM
CM,

I'm glad you made good choices. I hope you can have a yard sale if it would help you.

We have had a very spendy day!

Dh has been contemplating an electric push mower because he has back and shoulder problems that make it hard for him to pull the cord on our very old gas mower without hurting himself. Today he did some mowing and was wishing out loud in my general direction that he could get into some tight areas. It did him no good, because I can't pull the start at all.

He asked if I would mow some of the areas he currently mows for me if we had an electric mower. I said probably, and the next thing I knew we were in the truck. He bought the mower ($100 off at the store I insisted on starting at because I wanted to look at their chicks) and then bought me the nicest pair of waterproof steel toe chore boots I have ever owned and some pepper and basil plants. (The chicks were unexciting)

He even let me stop and pick up a folding shelf for my classroom from the curb.

I am heading out to get the plants in in a few minutes in honor of my new approach of trying to finish the whole job and not start things that will hang over my head. (It is new yesterday - more on that later.)
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CriticalMass
Posted: 18 June 2022 - 02:10 PM
Helped out at church garage sale this past week. Spent most of my time working the craft supplies table. Quite a bit of the items had belonged to the lady who ran our quilt guild, who passed away last fall. I don't know if I had mentioned that I and the other quilters had been helping the lady's sister this winter and spring to get the stuff out of the house and over to the church. There was quite a bit of it.

And of course plenty from other donations as well. I stared at it for hours, as well as walked around looking at other tables. So. Much. Stuff. The crusty little resin teddy bear figurines, the scrapbooking stuff once sold at inflated prices at home parties, geese pillows from decades ago when geese were popular until suddenly they weren't, personalized "keepsake" ornaments. Christmas ephemera out the wazoo. And all of it stuff No One Wanted Anymore.

And I can't say I didn't find a few supplies to use in my own projects but I hope I was very selective and didn't just get cheesy junk. I remembered so many times in years past when I was suckered in by marketing. Crafts are a real double edged sword for creative people. We need some kind of outlet, yet if we are aware of the problem of perpetuating the proliferation of useless junk, it becomes a real dilemma.

I was feeling a desire to go and get rid of all kinds of stuff from my own stash, coupled with the realization of how when I go to do that, indecision and despair can seize up my brain like rust in the gears. 😬 Don't get me wrong, I know I still want to make the effort, because the consequences of not doing so would be horrendous. But oh my, it is hard either way.

In some ways, if I could have my own garage sale, say in the fall when it's cooler, I feel like it might be motivating. Because my "household" is scattered piecemeal between various locations in my roommate's house and my storage unit. Bringing it together once and for all might give it some cohesion and I'd be able to visualize what is more essential for the future. My roommate doesn't feel comfortable having strangers around here, but maybe I could ask my cousin if she would want to have one at her house. Wish my cousin didn't live clear on the other side of town though.

Ah well. This next week I just finally get to catch up after the commitments elsewhere. First do basics like laundry, then try to assess where to start on the rest.
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Subclinical
Posted: 18 June 2022 - 02:02 PM
Tatoulua, Dh had a friend who was in the second world trade tower. They were told to wait at their desks for instructions. He got up and walked home. It took him 7 hours.

Lila, enjoy your social events and keep that table clear! You can do it! Keep us updated on the clothes.

I am in my afternoon slump. I baked more squash and froze it, put up trellis for the green beans that were supposed to be bush beans but obviously are not, put the rest of the pile of fence in my barn so it is not in the yard annoying Dh, cut more chamomile and put it in the dehydrator, pulled weeds, picked peas - we have enough for a meal now, and swept the back porch.

In a minute I will go plant more squash.

I have been thinking about the things I put in the trash can yesterday. If I put something in the trash can every day - that is hundreds of things a year, thousands of things in my lifetime. It seems like so much, so overwhelming. And yet, if I clear out just one net item a day from my house - the numbers are the same, but it seems like nothing, like it won't even make a dent.
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Lila
Posted: 18 June 2022 - 11:45 AM
So nice to wake up and have posts to read. Thank you Tatoulia and SubC for the thoughts. I am processing with the goal of decluttering.

I am trying to work through the clothing issue. It is shaped by my experiences of having gained and lost 80 pounds twice. Both times, I got rid of everything too big as I got thinner. And now I have regained weight a third time and am re-losing it again. This time, I saved some stuff, and thank goodness because each time I regained I had to go out and buy, or find, more. That's why I have nearly nothing to wear even though I bought a ton of things by mail, tried them all on and am returning almost all of it.

I know I can lose this weight again. In fact I have to, say my doctors. This morning I am down 15 pounds from when I was diagnosed. I think in 10 more pounds a huge amount of my clothing will fit, so I am forcing myself not to keep buying more in bigger sizes.

So in 3 months a lot of these clothes will fit. That's why I haven't gotten rid of more. Will I get rid of bigger clothes as I lose again? Yeah, probably, because I absolutely cannot afford (health wise) to gain it back.

When I think of the boxes and boxes of nice clothes in my current size that I donated years ago, it makes me so mad. If I had them now it would be better. Oh well.

I did get the dining room table totally cleared last night (yay!) and we had dinner together. I am going to try and keep it clear. The bar/counter is a piled up disaster but not my priority today.

Today I will sort my papers in the box next to me, run the dishwasher, clean my room a bit more.

I was invited to 3 social events today (shocking) and will drop in at each one. If I don't, I think feelings would be hurt so I will stop in. I need to pick up a graduation gift for one of them.
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Tatoulia
Posted: 18 June 2022 - 11:02 AM
Lila, I have a huge well of compassion for you and your fears. I have to live and work within a few easily walkable miles. Under 2 is the ideal, and I've managed that for over 30 years. I need to know if something terrible happens, I can get home.

I am an extrovert who really enjoys quiet time.

Since the blankets make you feel safe, keep them. Do you have too many for the number of people in your home? I forget how many people you have at home. For example, 40 blankets for 4 people might be too many. That said, if this topic is too stressful, move on to other items.

I like what SubC said about space. Space is so lovely.

With clothes, I think not COULD I wear it again but WILL I wear it again. Answer is almost always No. I've been on this journey a lot longer so am offering you the ?finished product,' so to speak, of where I've ended up. Could I use this item/shirt/crockpot/spoon/towel Is a lot different from will I? Learning the difference has helped me. Since my mother is creative (I am not), she looks at everything for the potential and it drives me nuts. I now give her things in no packaging. No gift bags, no ribbons, no boxes. She once kept a thin, narrow box about the size of a stationery box and I said for what and she said "I could put something in it". I threw it out.


Right now I have four sets of sheets for my bed and one set for my fold-out couch. I would prefer only three sets for my bed yet all are the percale I love and all are in good shape. So they stay. When one set gets worn out (although, I rotate them), I'll donate and not replace because four sets is excessive for me.

I used to have two sets of sheets for foldout, which made zero sense. Even when my friend lived here, I frequently swapped out for a set of my sheets (which are the wrong size for the foldout, and it was fine). I think I told you I bought her a comforter for the bed and when she left for her own apartment, she took the comforter, pillows, etc with her. I do not keep a comforter for the twin foldout. If someone is staying a night or two, I make do. If it's a week or more, I buy a comforter and pillow then launder and donate once done. I don't have room or any desire to keep. I know I am fortunate to be able to buy and donate. I generally find a pretty sweet deal for $15.99 or $19.99 comforters at Macys. The pillows are about $4 at target.

A work colleague is staying here at the end of July. There's a retirement party that she cannot expense to the company. She'll be here two nights. And I love her dearly. So she can use two of the pillows off of my bed (no need to buy and donate) and I'll cobble together a throw or two as a covering.

I have a bag of clothes for goodwill. I'm excited to get rid of them. Some I can still wear, but shouldn't.

My house is a wreck from all the socializing and running on empty. I ran the dishwasher this AM and have done a load of linen pants and shirts that are now hanging to dry.
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Tatoulia
Posted: 17 June 2022 - 09:40 PM
Not caught up on posts. Quick drive by. Busy week. Dinner with friend Wednesday was lovely and she loved my house. Thursday was hosting various business partners at lunch and then a trolley tour. Today was US Open and I had a blast. Adding in Tuesday at the Red Sox, and it's been like a vacation for me. Wow!

Goodnight dear friends. I'm working on a bag of donations.
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Subclinical
Posted: 17 June 2022 - 09:05 PM
Lila, I'm sorry you lost your friend.

I do understand the might not have what you need thing - I would keep the blankets too. Because you might need blankets. There was a time I lived in my car for a short time - it actually gave me a really critical view of how few things I actually need. But temperature control is one of those things.

But you don't need clothes that don't fit. You just don't. You need space to live more. Keep telling yourself that until you believe it. Space is a thing. You don't need money to get it, you can trade clothes that don't fit for it! And maybe for a little money too.

How is the table?

We didn't get the mail, so just food came in today. It is all taken care of.

I threw two pieces of recycling that were too hard to get clean into the trash bag.
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Lila
Posted: 17 June 2022 - 04:35 PM
another post...

SubC, I don't really want to go out either. In fact, for about 10 years I almost never left my house, except to take my kid to school or her events. Before she was in school I spent like 4 years in the house and only left for doctor appointments, most weeks. And I had no one over and called no one and most days saw no on but my family (kids were in school tho). I am a major introvert. I guess it started to feel like too much isolation and I started focing myself to be social. It is SO HARD for me. I always feel like people don't REALLY like me. I feel like everyone else has some inside jokes and are best friends and then there I am on the outskirts looking at my shoes, not knowing what to say. I started to get pretty depressed. I did not have a normal social life as a child. Social is hard for me. But for the last 4 years I have just forced myself, and started to pray and ask God to help me, and I just make myself. Although, any minute I feel I could revert to the black hole of complete isolation.

I did have a very close, dear friend all those years and we texted and emailed several times a day. She was the only person I talked to for most of 10 years. She died 2 years ago and now it is hard. I like posting here, like people care what I am sharing and I get to know you guys too.
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Lila
Posted: 17 June 2022 - 04:26 PM
I imagine 75% by volume, SubC. I imagine taking 'before' photos of every area, then photos of the items being donated outside my house, then 'after' photos with sooo much space!! I want it so badly. I don't know why I let money stand in the way of having this. But to me it says, this is the reason I hoard: I might not HAVE what I need.

I went through an awful divorce due to abuse, and when he left, I had nothing. I mean I could not buy shoes or anything. It was a constant struggle until I got through college and had an income.

So for example, blankets. I have blankets that I don't even LIKE. But I pull them out when company comes (like when though?? 4 years ago?) and when I think about getting rod of the sheets and blankets that never get used, I remember when our power was shut off and we were so cold and needed blankets. I am afraid if I donate them, power will go out and we will be cold and I won't have money to go buy blankets.

That's how it is with most of my stuff.

Anyway, I worked on the table and just took a deep breath and shoved the stuff that goes in the hall closet, in there. It's all heaped up, but that's a project for another day. Other things got put where they belong, or throw out. Now there are only a few (less than 5) items on the table to be put away. I did one wipe of the table (dust etc) and will wash it off when I get those items put away.
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Subclinical
Posted: 17 June 2022 - 04:03 PM
Yay! So happy to see people here!

CM, thanks for keeping me company, and I'm glad the dolls found a new home! I think people's bodies need different things. I like plant foods. If I'm going to be honest, I like fruits better than veggies, but I like plants. I also love dairy and carbs, but I feel better when I limit those. It's a struggle.

Lila, I struggle in the opposite direction. I don't want to go. I want to have friends, but I don't want to have to leave my house to have them. I think that's one of the reasons you guys are so important to me. If I had an irl support group like this and I had to drive more than 10 minutes to get there, I would probably stop going. (It takes 10 minutes to get to the closest grocery store, so I only go there in an emergency. Otherwise I wait until I am passing a grocery store on my way home from somewhere else. "Somewhere else" is almost always work.) Also, I don't want to do any of the things.

I hope your other computer gets fixed.

Here is what I think, your clothes are like my milk. You don't need piles of clothes you can't use. You need clothes you can use right now, and you need space. Trust that you will find the money you need for the things you really need. Start by taking back every single thing that doesn't fit right now and can be returned. Put that money aside.

Do you have a consignment shop? My suggestion would be to go through the things that don't fit and take everything they might accept there (you may keep items that you truly love that are not replaceable, but you have to truly love it) That money can also go in your clothing fund. Have you quit your fast food habit? Can you put money in your clothing fund that you save from drinking healthy smoothies instead? Would that motivate you?

Could I choose the 75%? Is it by volume or by number?

I made my clean refrigerator shelf and I have been attacking the laundry and dishes.I am down to four clean baskets to put away and one load to hang. All the beds have clean sheets. Dishes are still badly backed up.
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Lila
Posted: 17 June 2022 - 02:57 PM
hello friends, I am back on my chromebook. I need to figure out what is wrong with the other one. Meanwhile I do need to post.

I too have been spending on clothes and STILL even though I returned 90% of them, marely anything I kept REALLY fits well. "Almost." In 10 pounds. I keep ordering bigger sizes and I guess I am fatter than I think. This sucks.

This morning I woke up and stared from bed at the piles and piles by my bed, all over that rocking chair, on top of every surface and the floor. I don't know why it keeps happening but it is making me depressed.

Two goals today:
1) that area. I went through the top layers, hung up 4 items of clothing in the closet. I sorted a drawer and rearranged and made room for a few of those "almost" shirts. Fact is, I could happily donate 75% of my clothing if I had, say, a thousand dollars dedicated to getting what I really need and want... about $150 for clothes that fit NOW and the rest to hold onto to buy things as I lose weight. Maybe that is the solution. Find $1,000 and allow myself $150 for now and the rest as I lose. My closet and bins would be SO empty. Alas, I live in fear that I will not have money to buy what I need, so I am scared to donate everything and be stuck with nothing to wear. I really ought to just return everything that still can be returned, and save that money. I did return a lot.

Along these lines, is there an amount of money that, if someone offered you, you would give up 75% of ALL your belongings? What is the minimum amount you would take? I have often thought, if someone would come with a giant truck and "buy" 75% of what I own, I would do it. I would take 10k for sure. Then I would save that, and ONLY buy things as I need them... not replace all this crap! A huge part of the battle for me is I do not have funds to buy what I need. If I had money in the bank I would gladly get rid of almost everything.

2) the dining room table. I have Tot and her parents coming for dinner. It is piled with stuff and dusty. Worked on it and realized stuff needs to go into the hall closet, but the hall closet is literally exploding into the hall. So... stalled.
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Lila
Posted: 17 June 2022 - 01:34 PM
Tatoulia, thank you for that explanation. It makes sense. So my task to orient to today is to clear the table so we can have dinner together tonight. I will focus on putting the stuff on the table away. When that is done it's a win.

SubC, thanks! No new tot yet! I thought she would be here by now. Any day! My event did not get postponed, so I went because I really did WANT to be included. I struggle with feeling left out, so when get an actual invitation to a thing that is not for like 50+ people... I feel so grateful they thought of me, so I want to go, because I'm afraid if I don't , they won't invte me next time. I don't know if that is a healthy way to be, or not.

My laptop s gltchng so I will post this and try to post again after t stops.
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CriticalMass
Posted: 17 June 2022 - 11:39 AM
Hi SubC, I'll keep you company for a bit.

"Don't buy work" - spot on. I came up with the phrase "Don't buy a project" some years back. A garment that needs altering, a gizmo that needs repairs, etc. I'm not perfect at keeping that resolution when it comes to dolls, haha. However, there have been several fixer upper dolls I've let go of, and the few remaining are ones I am more committed to.

I noticed yesterday at the church a lady had a couple dolls I'd donated in her stuff she was buying. That made me happy.

The heat is here to stay awhile, I am afraid. 🥵

I can only observe in puzzlement you, my roommate, and various other people who garden and eat lots of vegetables. The vegetables I will eat, and the very exact and infrequent conditions under which I will eat them, are exacting and arcane. The only thing I really ever crave vegetable wise is stir fry type dishes from the Chinese buffet, or my own version I learned to make. Restaurant or home, the foods must still contain some meat and starch to be palatable to me.

And yet, except for the weight, I'm healthy as a horse. 🤷‍♀️
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Subclinical
Posted: 17 June 2022 - 10:32 AM
Good morning.

Talking to myself.

Sometimes I feel very out of step - I post and post, and then all of a sudden you all post when I barely have time to read!

Heat index is still awful, but supposed to break tomorrow.

Here are the things that came into my house yesterday:
Food
Mail

I recycled my mail. Dh will take care of his mail just fine.

All the food I brought in yesterday is washed or chilled or dried or cooked and put away ready to eat or cook with as appropriate! (The onions and garlic are racked and drying)

I made popovers and a cake. My food goal for today is to get one shelf of my fridge clean and with fresh food ready to eat on it. Just one shelf. I would also like to go to bed with all the dirty dishes in the dishwasher, but that might be too much.

I'm not sure yet what else I will work in today.

I found a very encouraging YouTube channel.

Most of what I watch on YouTube is homestead vlogs, and most of the people on them are young and have at least one if not both people making their living mostly or entirely from YouTube. So, everything looks great.

I found this channel because they had a vlog titled "we can't farm like - insert vlogger I watch - (and neither can you)." They have four kids and one bitty grandkid. Their youngest looks to be early to mid teens. They have less land than I have. They weigh more than I do. They get out of breath talking and working at the same time and they move like things hurt. Their "yard" is "poverty grass" like mine, and their garden is full of weeds. Their equipment is old and cobbled together and patchwork and dirty, and their "today's project" is something like putting plywood on the back of the hoop house, cleaning the coop out, and hanging the nesting boxes. They look like they are having fun, and they make me feel better.
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Subclinical
Posted: 16 June 2022 - 02:29 PM
Follow up from post below-

And then I brushed my hair, put a bra on, drove three miles round trip, and discovered I should have checked Facebook because they are closed this week due to the heat.
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Subclinical
Posted: 16 June 2022 - 02:04 PM
Today's thoughts, managing resources.

One thing I have been telling myself lately though is "don't buy work." Because I might have enough money for something, but I don't have enough time. So, for example, when I saw an amazing deal on fruit trees a while back, I actually thought about buying them - a whole little orchard for the cost of a few trees! I would love to have an orchard! I have the space! - screeeeech - fortunately I stopped myself by reminding myself how many HOURS it would take to plant the trees, while I lost things I already have by not taking care of them.

So today I have been working on enjoying the abundance of resources I have.

I planted 7 gift tomato plants in the garden.

I picked mint and chamomile and put them in the dehydrator for tea.

I picked snow peas from the garden.

I made mozzarella cheese from a gallon of milk, rebatched it for a little ricotta, and put the whey away for bread baking,

I baked squash that have been stored in my basement so I can bake biscuits tomorrow (and some to freeze for biscuits another day because the squash won't keep much longer)

I did a load of laundry because I don't need more dish towels, I need clean dish towels.

And I gave the chickens a gallon of milk that had soured in the back of the fridge. And here is the problem - I had money for goat feed, and time to milk, and strain the milk, and wash the milking equipment, but I did not have time to rotate the milk and use it in a timely fashion. There are two answers to this: less time spent on milk or more time spent on milk. Because I clearly am not spending the RIGHT amount of time on milk.

So, now I am going to go to the farmer's market and buy up to 4 pepper plants and no more than three jars of jam in varieties I will not make this year, and also hot mustard if the hot mustard person is there. And maybe basil plants.
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Subclinical
Posted: 15 June 2022 - 06:29 PM
I got a little sidetracked.

I noticed the oregano was about to bloom (flavor is best before blooming) so I spent a lot of time this afternoon cutting tgat and filling the dehydrator (it's almost done)

Then I found a very labor intensive (washing and chopping) recipe for beet greens that used garlic, onion, and cream, so I made that for dinner - salt, sugar, spices, and accompanying rice were from the store.

I'm going to read a little bit before I go out and attack the garlic again.
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Subclinical
Posted: 15 June 2022 - 12:05 PM
We're a team! Lol! Obviously I think Bean is amazing.

CM, good job clearing out the things you don't wear. I need to get more serious about that.

Usually when I buy new clothes I shop online in the 1950s. Seriously, I found an online store that carries xs to 5x the 1950s are the right cut for my body and they usually come in 100% cotton with pockets. When they have sales things run as low as $25. They have mostly dresses and separates, not too much casual.

I am excited about the quilt!

Here is a question for you related to the garage sale - I have been reading a book on taking back your time, and one of the questions she suggests asking (rather than "can ) is "will it be worth to them what it will take out of me?"

I have decided that the next few days are going to be harvest focused. This morning I lifted the garlic, picked some onions, a few radishes, the first snow peas, and a lot of beets and pulled weeds. Then I had lunch and a shower and I am having a rest. This afternoon I will work on washing/putting up/prepping the things I brought in, and this evening I'll go shake the hopefully dried dirt off the garlic and bring it in to finish curing.

I'm trying to run some dishes too.
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CriticalMassE
Posted: 15 June 2022 - 10:24 AM
SubC, Bean is growing up so much, as I'm sure you already know. He sounds like a smart little guy! And definitely enjoys his Grammie time.

Tatoulia, the clothes thing sounds intriguing. I wish I could come up with a version of something like that. To me, it's depressing all the flimsy, trashy looking clothes that are sold in places like Walmart and Target and even places a bit more upscale - but so many of them made of synthetics which make me itch and sweat. I refuse to buy them. And then I go to the thrift store and see that same stuff hanging limp and sad on the racks - and I still wouldn't pay a penny for it because I hate it and would never wear it.

In my own wardrobe, I've been getting rid of anything I have ambivalent feelings about. Yet it's hard to find something basic, cotton fiber, in a super comfortable style, with decent POCKETS which for me are not optional, to build a solid wardrobe. Stuff I do feel comfortable in, I wear for decades if it holds up. So I think you're wise to find some company that can provide quality pieces that'll last and that's so cool that you can return the stuff and they'll take care of recycling it. That way, you already know what you'll do eventually, and that saves a bunch of dithering and procrastination. The setup seems "tailor made" 😉 to help eliminate the clothing limbo that engenders clutter.

Mar, I'm glad your situation worked out. We've all known that relief!

Hi Lila, Road

Weather here is stinking hot and also windy. Dust in the air making a haze. I almost wish I hadn't said I'd help with the church garage sale, just because I feel like vegging instead of being obligated to be places and do things. But it'll be over in a couple of days.

And in a couple of days I hope to get a swim in, which will be so refreshing and one good thing about the hot weather. Cringe at the gasoline it takes to drive to the water park, though. 😬 Alternate plan would be to go to the Y that is closer but the pool is indoors. We'll see what seems best at the time.

I did get my quilt top all assembled, which feels great. I think it will need to have a border around it, but that's simple, except for the need to go elsewhere with more room to do the bigger pieces cutting and sewing, yet again. I did the final sewing together of large sections at the church yesterday. Had been doing medium sections even at the house here, on the kitchen table, I wanted so much to get this thing done. The kitchen table is in the traffic path though, being the inside of the corner of the L between kitchen and living room. But sometimes I can manage, until I can clear the workspace I used to use in the back room.
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Subclinical
Posted: 15 June 2022 - 06:49 AM
Dropped the trash and recycling.

Emptied one shelf in my classroom and discovered that removing them is going to be easy but underneath them is horrible and disgusting.

Had a great time at class.

My brakes are seizing up in the heat, so planning to stay home as much as possible or drive the truck the rest of the week. Hopefully Dh can fix the brakes this weekend.

Horrible heat index - I'm struggling because I need to get out in the garden in the mornings and I also need more sleep.
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Subclinical
Posted: 14 June 2022 - 02:21 PM
Sorted through all my pants/shorts. Now have fewer pants than before the jeans purchase.

Dropped all the "donation pile" stuff since before Christmas at my preferred thrift store. (Added five baskets and three pairs of shoes besides the pants and shorts)

Bought one more pair of shorts. Cut the fraying hems off another pair so they are now "fashionable". I'm probably ok now.

Got AC charged. (Ouch!$$)

Got a few groceries - fruit, nuts, fancy bread, cereal, paper towels (using them to clean the goat's face and the roll that has been in the vet box for years is almost gone)

Ate lunch, SECOND load of wash is in the dryer.

Now to give the baby goat her eye drops, reload the car with trash and recycling, drop that, possibly stop by my classroom to empty shelves, and go to pottery class. (With my new friend/former student)
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Subclinical
Posted: 14 June 2022 - 07:39 AM
4 responsible things I did so far today:

Added a pair of shorts to the donate pile (they are "worn out" to me, but in a way tgat is currently "fashionable"😵‍💫)

Took my vitamins (realized I had stopped doing that shortly before school ended 😮)

Made an appointment to get my car AC charged this afternoon.

Started a load of wash.
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Subclinical
Posted: 14 June 2022 - 06:45 AM
Bean liked the library. I signed him up for the summer reading program. They gave him a new book with pictures of babies in it and they gave me a workbook and a calendar with preliteracy activities on every day. Which I did not need, but brought home anyway.

while we waited for his daddy he colored in the workbook and we read the "big big" books in the children's room. (The ones that are about 2-3 ft tall)

After they left I went to the city goodwill (where they have closed the dressing rooms) I took 3 pairs of shorts into the bathroom (the sign on the door says "if you are seen entering or leaving the bathroom with merchandise, you will be asked to leave." - I said a mental "deal." on my way in.) one pair fit, so I bought that and a little lidded picnic style basket.

The basket is for Bean. Yesterday I gave him a little toy sandwich set to play with and he loved it. The set was in a too big cardboard shipping box in my basement. After Bean got it out, he picked up the cardboard box from the couch and said "take care this for Grammie." Then he carried it over and set it next to the back door with the recycling. Maybe he is going to save me from myself.

Anyway, the basket is just the right size for the set. The basket was $2 and the shorts were on sale for $2.25. (Gas for the whole round trip was about $10.🙄)

I need shorts that fit right now because mine pretty much wore out the last two years.

Tatoulia, I appreciate that if you have money to spend you are spending it on durable, natural fiber clothes! "Voting with your dollars" is a real thing. We saw the effects of it during Covid. (Not that covid is over, but as a society shaping force - covid is over.)

Heat index of 106 today. I have a class tonight. Dh got up and made his own breakfast and left this morning and mostly let me sleep (he woke me a couple of times moving around) I slept until 7.
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Tatoulia
Posted: 13 June 2022 - 09:29 PM
Congratulations, Mar! Keep up the good work!

BF went with me to mom's tonight. We brought her an ice cream sandwich. She seemed pretty happy. She was glad BF came with me. She's seeing more of him these days because he's working less but she doesn't know about the sale of the one business. No need to tell her.

Afterward he walked me home and we sat outside and it was fun. He was taking pictures of the buildings across the street and we were laughing and having fun. It is nice getting relaxed time in with him.

Turns out we are in the super swanky seats at the ball game tmr night. Air conditioned, great food, private bathroom. It will all be great.

I have to admit that I'm spending thousands on clothes right now. I need clothes that fit. I hate the way they all look on me but they are quality clothes and ethically made. I hate them because I am fat. I have the money this isn't debt. It's a bit of giving up on myself but in other ways it isn't. Eileen Fisher's clothes are extremely wearable, made to last, they repair them, and they take them back and recycle when you're done. So I like the message with the clothes that they are built to last. The skirts will easily be modified once I get serious about losing weight. I've also picked up some pieces from a few other stores. I'm concentrating on linen and cotton. I just need clothes that make me feel good, even if I don't like myself right now. Linen just feels so nice.

So that's my confession for now. I need to finish folding and putting away my laundry so I can start tmr off on the right foot.

I am so grateful to you all. I need to keep reducing my things and you are helping me more than you know. You've gotten me so far and now I'm realizing the remaining areas to work on. It's clear.

I've gotten rid of clothes I'm not going to wear again, at any weight. I'm getting older and am less about wearing navy right now. I used to have a wardrobe of all navy. I love navy. But neutrals are having a moment in my house right now.
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Mar
Posted: 13 June 2022 - 06:16 PM
THANK YOU FOR YOUR PRAYERS AND GOOD WISHES!

All went ok. There was no need to enter the house. Now I can breathe, hehe.
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Subclinical
Posted: 13 June 2022 - 01:58 PM
Hi mar, I hope things went well with your relative.

I tried to post this morning, but it got eaten.

I have had another good day with Bean. I take him back soon.

I decided not to take the third week of camp. I will be harvesting things in the garden and I don't want to give up the time with Bean.

It is super hot here. We took the compost out, gave the goats some treats, and planted six squash seeds and that was enough.

I had more plans for after Bean today, but I have changed my mind. The heat index is 101 and my car has no AC. Sil is meeting us at the library because it has AC and Bean will only have to be in my hot (driving with the windows open and he has a drink) car for 20 minutes.
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Tatoulia
Posted: 13 June 2022 - 11:36 AM
Mar, praying for you. There's no shame in saying, we let the house get away from us and I'm actively working on it and have a support group on line. I think that people are much more forgiving these days. I will pray for you to let it go.

I'm doing laundry today because it makes me happy. Cat sheets and I also washed two pair of my allbirds shoes.

I have some things to take care of today. It is trash night and I want to get rid of as much as possible. My friend who has never been to my house comes Wednesday night.

I'll keep you posted on my progress.
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Mar
Posted: 12 June 2022 - 09:57 PM
Afraid of he seeing my house D-:
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Mar
Posted: 12 June 2022 - 09:54 PM
Hi Tatoulia, SubC, CM, Lila, Road!

I'm getting anxious. A relative wants to come to visit us tomorrow. We don't receive guests because of the pandemic but also because of the mess. We will receive him at the garage, but I'm afraid

PLEASE, PRAY FOR US FOR EVERYTHING BEING OK!!

I hope I will catch up on your posts soon
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Tatoulia
Posted: 12 June 2022 - 09:04 PM
SubC, I am very good at these types of events. I'm outgoing and have that gracious hostess thing going for me. It's a lot of work and a lot of energy. I'm usually exhausted afterward. So much effort.

Soujnds like you had a good day with Bean!

I made a list today and did a lot of the things. Not all. I got mom a few groceries. I need to see her tmr. I only saw her for a few minutes all weekend.

I'm going to water the flowers in my window boxes and go to bed. I'm sure the work piled up while I had Friday off.

Bf did not go to work today. He's trying to phase out going to the old business. I know he's struggling with it.
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Subclinical
Posted: 12 June 2022 - 12:43 PM
Tatoulia, that is the sort of thing my dd1 likes. Company ball games and concerts and such. It's my worst nightmare. No, second worst, right after online school.

My work put together a happy hour for the teachers (I think it was pay your own though). At the end of the day the front desk person and I were the last people in the building and she was closing up and asked "are you coming to happy hour?" I told her "I'm not really a happy hour kind of girl." She said "come for the chips!" -lol. The beer part I'm fine with, although I prefer a mixed drink, or wine. It's all the rest of it.

Bean is napping. The rain held off, so we managed to get out in the garden and plant pumpkins, edemame, and beets. I pulled some lettuce (replaced it with the beets)

I baked some squash so we can make biscuits later and he ate a little with his lunch (along with rice, "crunchy" (dried) tomatoes, raisins, and applesauce.) the rice and raisins came from the grocery store. Grammie ate "leaves like a goat" (also in my salad: hard boiled egg, walnuts, crunchy tomatoes, radishes, purslane, and raisins)

Oops, gotta run out and give baby goat her eye drops before he wakes up!
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Tatoulia
Posted: 12 June 2022 - 11:13 AM
Wow! I've now caught up on the posts!

Everyone is doing a lot. Very motivating for me! I way overslept today. Here it is 12 Noon and I'm having my first cup of coffee for the day!

I have to do laundry, see mom, do mom's groceries, and help BF with a project. It's amazing having more time with him.

I have a big work week ahead of me. Client-facing stuff. Baseball with business partners one night (plus dinner) and then the USOpen golf is here and I have a few days of that. I'm looking forward to the experience And we have a few suites, etc, but the unlimited food and drink concerns me with whether people will drink too much and become obnoxious. Again, I'm looking forward to the experience.

I may dip downstairs and see if anyone is using the laundry. I did two loads last night.

I have a list of things to accomplish inside the house today. I'll report back!
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Subclinical
Posted: 12 June 2022 - 05:14 AM
Good morning! Bean is sleeping. I'm going to try to sneak off and do the milking without him this morning because he's been timid lately and wants to be in my lap while I milk. Dh can get up if Bean does.

I promised him we would plant pumpkins today, but it's supposed to rain. :( we'll see. We can always bake.

Lila, I forgot to say that I am excited for you about the new tot!

I hope your thing last night got postponed. I understand exactly. It is like when I am exhausted and hoping for a snow day - I need a day off. I could take a day off, but I don't want to miss school, so I want us to all have a day off.

Good job on the cleaning!

CM, congrats on the yard sale. Make sure you unload ALL the things fir the next one. No second guessing!

Road, you are doing a good job too. Little things add up.

Hi Tatoulia!
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Tatoulia
Posted: 11 June 2022 - 08:06 PM
Hi Lila, very good news on the staging of the cancer. I'm so grateful for that. I have not read all of the posts because I wanted to answer your question.

Orient to the task, not the result. I'll do my best to explain it. I first heard it many years ago when a prosecutor was giving a lecture and she was describing about working with witnesses, esp child witnesses. And she didn't want her witnesses and victims to be worried about the outcome of their testimony. She wanted them to testify, truthfully, and work on getting their testimony out in a clear, honest, credible fashion. She did not want her witnesses to try to figure out where the questioner was going with the questions (no match for a trained professional) or what impact the answer could have on the outcome. The witness or victim doesn't need to carry the extra burden of the whole case, just the burden of testifying.

So I think about that a lot. If your task is to clean a box or get one bag of clothing done, that's what you should orient to. Did I accomplish that task? If you are orienting to the result, the interior monologue will go more along the lines of, this is useless, one bag didn't make a dent, I still live in a pigsty, etc. so orient to the task, and you gain victory and strength. Orient to the result, and there you are, carrying a double burden that you don't need to. It may even prevent you from doing the task.

Another way to look at it is the old saying, save your pennies and the dollars will take care of themselves.

So that's what I meant. Move forward. Start a task. FINISH a task. Go on to the next task. Yes you really can get rid of 20 bags of stuff and still have too much stuff. But, you've gotten rid of 20 bags of stuff, and that's fantastic.
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Lila
Posted: 11 June 2022 - 06:48 PM
post 2, what I got accomplished:

- unloaded dishwasher and loaded again
- cut up veggies and put in a marinade for tomorrow
- ate a frozen vegan dinner and a small mango
- made an oatmilk latte
- played with the dog, he was happy!
- this one is bigger: I have not cleaned out the drawer under my stove in years and years. I know, gross. Oh well. Lot of gross going on over here... so as I was going to put away clean pots in there, I saw there was only 1 pan and a lid in there. So I took them out, sprayed some natural cleaner in the drawer, and wiped it out with paper towels... 3 times. It was so bad. But now it is clean and I feel better about myself.

I also have asked teen to take out the compost and husband to take out the very full trash, but no one has done it yet so I guess if it is not done soon, it will be me.

I have a thing to go to tonight, that I DO want to go to, but don't... so am kind of hoping they cancel it for rainy weather, because this is a thing I really do want to go to, but not tonight. So if they have it I am going. Does that make any sense???
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CriticalMass
Posted: 11 June 2022 - 05:40 PM
Lila, I'm glad things are looking hopeful for you.

Sounds like everybody has their ups and downs and challenges and I'm rooting for you.

We did get the bunny rescue fundraiser garage sale done today, which is at least one thing to tick off the list. We'd been having a lot of rain these past couple of weeks. Now it has shifted to summer heat, and the humidity makes it draining, and it's supposed to crack 100 and then some tomorrow.

Church garage sale is next week so they will get some of the leftovers from today. My van is stuffed pretty full but the things will be gone by tomorrow evening.

My quilt is getting closer to being done. That is one happy thing.

I'll check and see if I got any nibbles on the creative clutter thread.
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Road
Posted: 11 June 2022 - 03:03 PM
Subc, I am riddled with lipomas the little jerks. None in my butt that I know of... 🤓🤔

Lila, fantastic job in the kitchen, especially the fridge. I consider that level 2 cleaning... "advanced" if you will. You get bonus stars for that!

- changed the laundry over and brought a basket up to fold
- put a couple Of my son's tee shirts And a pair of jeans in the donate box
- found the basket of super moldy forgotten - twice forgotten - laundry. One thought that makes me feel I could move from my antique house to a newish ranch is the concept of having a washing machine in the hall between the bedroom and the bathroom. Then I'd be perf3ct at laundry, right?
- surveyed the nightmare that is the garage. Considered donating most of my sons baby toddler clothes... this was merely a mental exercise but it did not freak me out which is good. His school aged clothes were dealt with a few years ago.
- somehow found the genealogy box and brought that in the house. I know where the binders are going so hopefully this is not going backwards.
- adjust3d the tofu "press."
- Got out my trusty pruning shears - first time this season - unheard of!!! Pruned the red bud, the grape vine, the Japanese maple, and beat back the trumpet vine. Might* have stepped in some poison ivy so I washed up.
- picked s9me garlic scapes for the stir fry...

That's my afternoon report, people. Such excitement!
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Subclinical
Posted: 11 June 2022 - 02:39 PM
Lila, I am very relieved about the stage one!

I have a bunch of "lipomomas" which are "fatty tumors" they are non malignant and basically just caused by your body deciding to store a ball of fat somewhere random. apparently they are common, but most people get them in their butts so they don't notice.

Road, I am sorry about your niece. Your dinner sounds amazing!

I have cleaned up some dirty dishes and picked the spinach and cleared some space in the garden to plant pumpkins and edamame with Bean. He should be here soon.
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Lila
Posted: 11 June 2022 - 02:38 PM
Road, I do the hybrid recipe thing too! I like to cook, but I look at several recipes and figure out what will taste best from each one. It's fun. I hope yours turns out! Sounds delicious.

I have really worked! I got called to do some emails and calls for a problem with the place I volunteer for, got that done. Then I:

-cleaned out the microwave
-loaded the dishwasher
-washed a couple pans
-wiped down about half the counters
-took all the food off the 3 fridge shelves, washed the shelves, sorted the food, tossed and composted what was no good, and put it all back neatly. I do still need to do this for the veggie drawer, cheese drawer and door shelves but it looks a thousand times better and I know what's in there.
- ate some fruit, prepped some veggies to be cooked

I am taking a rest and will eat lunch and then do something else.
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Road
Posted: 11 June 2022 - 01:24 PM
Lila, Great news about the stage 1. Big relief.

Cm, good idea about the creative clutter. That's certainly a major category for me and I know it is for many people.

I'm forgetting other things...

Today so far I've worked on some genealogy stuff and then looked up some recipes and started prepping stuff for dinner. I am an intuitive cook and don't like following recipes, but now that I am dealing with some restrictions I find I have to try a lot of new recipes so I feel like I'm not deprived - especially of Thai/Vietnamese since it's typically at9mic levels of sodium. I'm trying lemongrass tofu. So far I've pressed the tofu and chopped up the shallot, lemongrass, garlic, ginger, bell pepper and cilantro... watched a few different videos on YouTube. Mine will be kind of a hybrid. Leave it to me to unnecessarily complicate things. Haha

The H took my son to his bro's to swim in their pool today so I'm sure he's having a blast. One of his cousins on that side has been in the hospital for more than two weeks with eating disorder stuff. I know the mom has been staying there and has gotten a crash course so I hope they will be able to take care of her when she does come home. Sounds like she's going to an inpatient program next. She hasn't been able to eat/drink enough to get the feeding tube removed so it's a very serious situation.

I'm looking around my room right now trying to figure out what I can do... maybe I'll start with bringing up the laundry...

Lila, please do "serial post." It helps me, too.

Over and out,
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Lila
Posted: 11 June 2022 - 11:58 AM
It's been a bit, but here I am, checking in, and doing better. The new testing and specialists determined I am stage 1 and the other tumors are not cancer (but still, hmmm). Anyway, they are just going to watch and wait, keep an eye on it. Good news!

Catchng up on posts:

SubC, I am trying to imagine the 4 square graph because it sounds very helpful. I am going to google it. I might be able to use that in my planner. Thanks for the suggestion.

SubC, I am sorry you are so worn out. I hope you can take some time off soon to take care of yourself. It can get so hard when we are overwhelmed. I find sugar so comforting... going to get back onto the healthy eating train today and post on the other thread.

Tatoulia, can you please explain orient to the task and not the result?

Tatoulia, omg, your mom eating a Tide pod. Good for you staying calm and not overreacting. I'm glad she is ok.

Mar, when I used to sanitize my purchases, I got an aerosol disinfectant and kept it by the door and misted it all on the front porch. Had a box inside the door to carry things n after they were sprayed. This is just an idea, so ignore if you prefer!

CM, hugs, I will pray for you. Thanks for letting us know.

hi Road! Nice to see you and I hope all the medical stuff calms down! You are getting things done for sure!

I need a minute to gather my thoughts about what I want to get done today, but if you all don't mind I will post that here for accountability and I hope to hear what YOU are working on today.

I am waiting for Tot the Second to be born any day :)
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Subclinical
Posted: 11 June 2022 - 10:52 AM
Good almost afternoon.

Road you are ticking off the boxes! Go girl! That electrodes thing sounds like it is going to be a nightmare.

We went to a baseball game in a nearby city with dd2 last night. It was fun, but we got hone at midnight. All of the weight of everything just crashed down in me and I slept until 11:30. (I put the does in with their kids last night so I wouldn't have to milk this morning)

I've got about 5 hours before Bean shows up for a two day visit (double overnight - it's his parents' anniversary)

CM, I like your thread, I like the idea of splitting things up - I think this thread chases people away sometimes because it's a lot and maybe they feel like outsiders and don't know that we're like the theme song from Cheers. It may be a bit before I come by though.
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CriticalMass
Posted: 10 June 2022 - 11:13 PM
Hey...

I had this idea 💡

Since I'm looking for other topics to post about, I thought maybe a thread about creative clutter might appeal to some of us and others who find this Daily Chat section. So I made one. If you're interested, check it out:

Creative Clutter Discussion Thread /url]
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Road
Posted: 10 June 2022 - 07:28 PM
Hi errrbody

Hope everyone is accomplishing some of their day to day goals and if their bandwidth is all used up, that you're taking care of yourself...

My little accomplishment today was picking my way though a stale shopping bag full of genealogy research. I kind of dove back into things last week after not doing much for a few months. I've had some weeks months where I was mostly doing stitching in my spare time and some weeks months where I couldn't even do that. I got some new dna hits on my welsh line which was exciting because I couldn't confirm anything on that line beyond ggparents by dna. The matches were from connections 6 generations back and it's the male Line surname which makes it more interesting for the relatives. (Sexist and annoying but that's how it is)... it's not fool proof but this type of thing generally confirms that your research is correct so yay! But anyway, I got through the end of the bag - about two reams worth? I was able to toss maybe half a ream of garbage and because the bag waS kind of gross and stained I tossed that as well. Since bins and bins of paper are one of my main categories, it's always good when I can get to the bottom of any container and throw some stuff away.

Saved my laundry just in time. So clean clothes inthedryer right now.

Also scheduled my sons 5 day EEG thing lawd help us. (He has to wear the electrodes for 5 days straight)... never mind that the place called me so it was totally passive on my part but I am still going to pat myself on the back for it. Haha.

Went to the nutritionist appt. and went to the gyne. Now most of my stuff is done and I will shift back to my son. The H is getting all his health stuff checked off too. He said at dinner this is the first time in his life he's ever watched what he was eating. Can all of us women just take a collective sigh and eye roll? 🙄😂 meanwhile I got to -17 lbs. down then bounced back up again to -13. Hoping it starts going down again tomorrow. Aiming for -30 total by the end of summer. Long way to go beyond that but that's what I'm focused on. Bike is ready to go so I can start doing short rides.
Alright I better fly.

So good to read everyone's updates...
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Subclinical
Posted: 10 June 2022 - 12:17 PM
Tatoulua, I wish I did not think that way. Every thing is accompanied by a subtext about how I suck because this thing has not been done already and I can't keep up with anything and I am lazy and I put stuff off and I am incompetent, so I am constantly being battered by a little invisible demon with a clipboard in my head.

I'm glad you were able to distract your mom from the imaginary rat bite! That sounds awful!

The evaluations are done and turned in!

Celebratory salad!
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Tatoulia
Posted: 10 June 2022 - 10:17 AM
Mar! Good work on the table! Keep going! Enjoy that sense of pride and accomplishment.

SubC you are getting through the evaluations! Interesting exercise you did yesterday! I don't think that way so I found it fascinating!

Road - thanks for checking in! And hello,CM and Lila!

I have PTO today and it is a beautiful day.

I have to gather up the garbage and shower. Meeting BF at 12:30 to go to the museum.

My flower boxes look nice in the windows.

Mom had a different incident last night, involving a hallucination. She though a rat bit her ankle. She was insisting on an ambulance. Her ankle was fine and the swelling she described (after having thought the bite happened several hours earlier) wasn't there. The foot was cool to the touch. So I redirected her and we watched tv together. The poor thing.
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Road
Posted: 10 June 2022 - 06:16 AM
Hi all, Time got away from me.

Hi Mar! And welcome back.

Will try to check back in later after I catch up.
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