Hi all,

Subc, thank you for the gold star! A gold star for adulting. Not very adult of me to want that is it?! Lol

Productive morning so far...

- Emptied dishwasher
- made pumpkin muffins (what?!?!)
- cleaned out another shelf in fridge, dumped a bunch, and cleaned some of the surfaces in the fridge... so far doing a good job maintaining everything I've cleaned in there. I think I figured there were 14 sections and I have 5 left to go. After that I may redo the cabs. Or figure out a perm solution for the condiments overflowing the corner counter. drives the H insane.
- posted progress pics in the fb hoarding group I'm in
- Talked w Vet about older doggies health issues
- fed dogs & got them outside a few times.
- checked on raised bed... one head of broccoli still going, and a ton of little Green tomatoes... the H trampled all over them fixing the fence, but they are still hanging on. Very minimal garden this year... next year?!

Sons bday was yesterday. Have several family members who either Tested pos or have been exposed recently so small gathering for party. We will do another Little one in a few days when they can come. Pissed that one sibling did not even call him. Furious actually. WTAF. Ok now I'm stewing. Anyway! The MIL is still in the rehab facility. She's feeling better so she's starting to be a little awful again. I feel for her but have to follow the H's lead on this. He's already said she can't stay here so we will see what happens.

Lila, I hope you can get a little reprieve with the teen being taken care of for a bit. So stressful being in limbo waiting for a slot to open up or whatever. Hope leg feels better soon... I'm sure signing the paperwork is hanging over you like a lead weight. Hopefully when you do it, it will feel like a relief. How are your health issues? I'm sorry I missed so much.

I keep having these attacks - chest pain and pressure like a heart attack but not a heart attack. Severe gas pain/ pressure... Maybe caused by allergic reactions? maybe hiatal hernia? Anyone?? Lasts for a few hours even after taking meds. And often repeats a few hours afterwards. And with my kidneys I don't think I can/should take antacids. Don't want to Go back to this jackass doctor again. But not sure I have a choice. I might already have a referral to a GI so maybe I will just do that. Ugh.

What's on the agenda for today, everyone?

Good morning!

CM, I'm glad you are addressing the problem - whatever it turns out to be - quickly.

Also nice to hear that you are getting some structure back in your life.

I have the raisin bread in the oven and the dishwasher started - the little teapot didn't fit, but that's ok, it still has tea in it that I might reheat or use for another loaf of bread to freeze.

I forgot to tell you guys that my mom sent Bean a book that will live here. So so far for October my in is one book, ten pots, and one replacement shirt. (The leaving shirt is in the donate pile, but I have not made the trip to the thrift store.) also I got a new barn coat right before the month started and have not discarded the old one - I wore it while doing fencing work because I was afraid I would catch the new one and tear it.

The pots are a log jam because I have too many pots. I make them, and then I like them, and I want to keep them, but I have nowhere to put them. Right now there are five pots sitting on my couch, one on the woodstove that has to move before we light the fire (and it's a high of 47 today, so basically - now.) and four in a box because they need to be cleaned up with a Dremel blade that I do not currently own, but want to buy.

My scullery counter is a mess. But not a huge mess. But the boxes I scooped into are still here. I might put them back on the counter for honesty. But in the boxes so I can move them.

I think Bean and I will mostly stay inside today. He can watch the fencing from the back window and we can bake. I am nearly out of bread.

Hi,

Still not completely settled but this coming week should see me regaining a little structure.

Last night settling into bed, I saw a bulge on my tummy. I'd seen it a month or so ago and prayed it wasn't a hernia recurrence, forgot about it, then last night was like dang, I am going to have to have the doctor look at it. I have a checkup coming up so at least I don't have to debate with myself over scheduling an appointment.

It's been almost exactly six years since the big surgery that was to have fixed everything, and that one can't be redone. It can only be patched with meshes. Two failed meshes were why I ended up having the big surgery. Sigh.

But I'm trying to think of positive things, such as hopefully I'm catching this early.

More about other stuff in another post soon.

Hi Lila! Thanks for stopping by!

I'm sorry your leg is giving you so much trouble. Sorry about teen too, but what was happening wasn't working, so maybe this will work. Fingers crossed!

Good job on the phone calls!

Yes, important and urgent things first. Then just important. Then just urgent if you decide it is worth doing. Sometimes I will do an urgent thing before an important thing because i know I can do the important thing later, but the urgent thing I will miss. If it is neither important nor urgent, you can ignore it.

I get into that "can't do the thing, so I will do nothing" place. It's hard. Later I get mad at myself. Resting is a thing though. If you need to rest, rest.

I did not finish the garden. I did not move the fence things. And I did not plant garlic.

The kids called and came out for dinner and brought Bean. He is asleep now and I need to go do my chores. I am putting them off and snacking on things I found in the freezer today. Sadly leftover dessert and not veggies.

I made dinner though. And I started the fruit soaking for raisin bread, and the kitchen isn't too bad. And almost every dirty dish is in the dishwasher! A few things are soaking and I will run it in the morning.

post 2 -

All I have done is eat and make a couple phone calls, but they were calls I needed to make, so that's good. I also tried to find a paper I need, but The Bedroom between-bed-and-closet Hoard has taken over. I think it is in there, somewhere. I'm torn between sorting all that stuff to look for it, and just moving on to do other things, so since I can't decide, I am sitting here watching tv. This is how nothing gets done...

I do need to decompress. I am not in a proper mindset to get actual work done.

I remember someone here sharing a grid. Let me think. Important and Urgent. I used it for awhile. I will try and rank the Important AND Urgent things as priorities and the Important but not urgent things as secondary.

Anyone else doing anything today?

hi all, it has been too long! I have not read your posts yet exept to see SubC having a good time here by herself! Sorry I missed it! I will catch up soon.

Since my last post it has been crazytown over here. Leg injury not better, can't get in to a specialist yet, had to go to the ER to check for a clot, trying to get my separation paperwork done but still not, because... Teen got admitted. I drove 4+ hours and slept in a hospital chair overnight and after 3 days they got inpatient. I hope they get the help they truly need. I miss them and love them so much but it is a relief, in a way, to get a break. Now I am home and trying to get my brain straight and figure out what to do.

So far today I just sorted mail, wrote new appoitments in my planner, and sorted some emails. I am trying to prioritize. Ex wanted to sign the paperwork while he was in town but that got short circuited by the crisis, so is that a priority now? Or not? I will email him and find out. I have my heat and a/c scheduled to be replaced this month. I have to drive once a week to do therapy with Teen. I have so much work to get caught up on, calls to make, everything is behind again.

And my house is in disarray. I feel in a relatively good place mentally, and hopeful. But again I am struggling to get priorities and a way to get caught up, with a bag leg and tons of things that shouldbe done now.

It's the subc blog!

Carrots are washed and trimmed - tops given to bunnies. They will need more work when I use them because there were a lot with nematode damage.

Leeks are also washed and trimmed and both are in the fridge.

Laundry is in the dryer. Compost went out.

Three wheels of cheese and six half pints of pesto got moved from the upstairs freezer to the chest freezer in the basement where they belong. Ten large ziploc bags and three items to recycle got washed. (Well, the recycling got rinsed - took 20 seconds. Why do I let this stuff pike up?)

The homemaking lady cleans her bathroom and vacuums her living room every day! Never gonna happen.

Ok, back to cleaning the kitchen.

I have picked all the carrots, most of the beets, all the leeks, and many green tomatoes.

I came in to sit for a minute and watch a video by a young woman who does home making/ homesteading videos.

She started the video by saying she always empties her dishwasher and starts some laundry first thing in the morning. That way she can put dirty dishes in as she goes, and at the end of the day there will be room in the laundry basket for the dirty things.

Then she labelled the broth she canned yesterday, carried it downstairs to put away, checked that her canned goods were neat and in order, and cleared and wiped her counter and sinks because "I'll be canning some tomato sauce later and there's nothing worse than getting things done and having no place to put them."

I would argue that there are many things worse, but five minutes in, I had realized two things:

1 - my house will never be as neat and clean as hers because she was basically ignoring the toddler at her feet the whole time she was filming and cleaning and there is no world in which any of those jobs would be more important to me than interacting with him - even if only to explain what I was doing to him and ask for his help even if he slowed me down. (He wasn't playing, he was just following her around.)

2 - she has a point about avoiding logjams. Because I have no idea where all this stuff I picked is going to go.

So I emptied my dishwasher and loaded it and started it and started a load of laundry, and took the dying sunflowers out of the vase and gave them to the chickens, and now I have had a drink and am going to rake out the compost.

Then, instead of picking more things from the garden, I am going to think about where all thus stuff is going to go and maybe make a little room.

Good morning!

I hope everybody is having a good weekend!

Dh has been working.

I woke up naturally this morning. Also hungry. Dh made a delicious, filing curry for dinner last night, and then I did not eat dessert or snack all evening.

I accomplished two things from my list yesterday.

I made cheese- a wheel of mozzarella and half a pint of ricotta,
And I finished digging the sweet potatoes.

I also cleaned up the kitchen, made an apple pie and some vanilla custard to freeze today, and I pulled out a row of dead beans to replace with garlic. I'm a little late planting the garlic.

Today I need to finish clearing the garden, although they've now pushed the freeze back to Wednesday... move a few things I have realized are in the way of the fence job, and possibly make some pots. The pots are becoming urgent. Apparently more urgent than the garden, but the weather is supposed to be really nice today. There is also plenty more cleanup to do.

Also, I miss being able to see pictures from other people, but I kind of like the "dinosaur" format. It is kind to my usually outdated electronics and poor computer skills. However, I just figured out I can do this:

🌟for Road for adulting!

Good morning.

Dh is not sleeping well, so I don't get to sleep - he is tossing and turning and getting up and down and turning his computer on in bed which keeps me awake. Then this morning his alarm went off early because he has to work again today. He begged me to get up and make coffee, and my chance of sleeping later was gone. So here I am on a Saturday morning when I should be caught up on rest, tired with a headache. Bah.

Road, it makes sense that if you get your fridge cleaned out and keep less stuff in it you will waste less food. It will be easier to see what you have and plan around it, and if your kitchen is clean it will be easier to make meals.

Impressive job cleaning your room!

I could never have a dog. Mr. kitty and I have an agreement. I pet him and feed him, care for his wounds, remove stubborn seeds from his fur and ticks from his skin, and when I'm around I open the door. He has a litter box he only uses if he gets trapped inside too long and he gets wormer if he needs it and a rabies shot every three years wether he likes it or not. In return he does what he wants.

I do not have any specific plans for today, but the house is a mess and I have a very long list of goals and projects. I'm trying to be realistic and choose the top two.

It's supposed to be sunny today with a high of 60, then partly cloudy with a high of 71 tomorrow, then freeze monday night and the beginning of the week. So I think it's put the garden to bed weekend.

Hi, oh I was hoping again I could figure out how to make a photo link work. The dinosaur format annoys me. anyway,

I was not inclined to clean but I committed to one small thing and ended up doing 5 or 6 things and basically cleaned a third of my room.

- I cleaned up the odd glasses, refilled the water filter
- nightstand top and drawer
- all clothes in closet
- hobby stuff where it goes
- cleaned up office supplies and chargers, etc.
- found a basket for the stack of "inbox" paperwork
- wiped down the table and swept the floor
- picked up some more garbage
- printed more pages for October

Now I feel like I got something done AND I maintained the office space and it's usable as a workspace again. I think maintenance is the lynchpin for me.

Good morning all,

Ella! Yay! I'm so glad you checked back in.

And thanks to all of you for welcoming me back. I am going to try to keep this train on the tracks.

I think my hoarding issues are inextricably linked to depression and still struggling with adulting... by that I mean things like taking care of your health, your house, your bills, etc. I realize you all don't necessarily have the same combo of issues that I do, but for me, when I Establish or maintain a healthy habit , that's all a part of this situation. Today, I picked up my sons prescription and took both of the dogs to the vet. One to get groomed and one to get her teeth cleaned. (My son was not out of medicine Yet) I have neglected To pick this up about 10x. Or in other words, I intended to pick this up at least 10x and I finally did it today. What is the big deal? I don't know but these are the dumb things I struggle with. Same with the dog. My sister has struggled so much with pet maintenance, it made me not want to get any more pets I guess for fear that I wouldn't be able to be a responsible pet owner. My husband really pressed to get the second one (maltipoo) and she 100% needs regular professional grooming. I have tried to keep it going myself but had to have her shaved a couple times anyway. This time it was 2.5 months in between and I did a better job brushing and combing and success! So the groomer just cleaned her up and dealt with her ears and face and feet and if I can keep it up we can keep her long and fluffy and just get her trimmed every couple months. Sooooo fluffy. Everyone had their shots, the older dog had to get some lab work done and we will see where we are at. I kind of want a gold star for adulting. Also last night made another "clean out the fridge" soup and tossed some stuff and made a mental note to clean out the bins again. For me the "waste less" goal is hovering, just out of reach... it's on a continuum on a point down the road a little. The point I'm at now - well, my kitchen related goals are:
- trying to normalize an emptier fridge
- get it clean and keep it clean
- do more meal planning

I actually think reducing waste will just follow along without having to work on it that much if I can achieve those first things. I don't know if I'm making sense. I'm blathering. Oh! I did toss another bag of garbage. I got the bedroom garbage and the bathroom garbage and tossed out a yucky old foam pillow from my sons bed.

I'm going to challenge myself to a mini project here in my room and report back. My night stand is pretty neat. Desk needs to be cleaned again, clothes are all in closet. Maybe I will try to ... hmmm having a hard time. Trying to resist the urge to set up another standing desk. I just need to clean off the two desks I already have in here and I still need a bed!

Over and out,

Hi Ella!

Good job on the trash! I hope you got your daylight things done.

The "name" space is for your name - ella. People do that all the time! It doesn't contact us or anything, so you can put notes to more than one person in the same post. Or still make a bunch of posts. CM used to do that when she would lose posts.

CM, I hope you are getting off of the struggle bus! I love thinking of you sitting at that big clear table in that peaceful space! Do it a lot so it will feel normal and then hopefully working on your physical space will feel like steps toward that and not as disruptive. Is the single stream getting cancelled, or is it expensive? Here recycling costs $1, but you have to have trash service to get it and the trash service is expensive. If I retire and stop driving past (literally within 50 ft) the community recycling bin four times a week I might resubscribe. They offer larger recycling bins now - although I don't know if there is an up charge.

Road, you gave a lot going on, but it sounds like you are making good progress! I'm glad the pictures are helping. I've thought about taking pictures, but I am still worried about seeing forgotten things later and feeling regret about discarding them.

My house is a mess again, but this weekend should be less crazy. I brought home another box from DD's house for the "baby library" last night - I went over after work and she fed me dinner because dsil was at a meeting and Dh was working late. Bean is going through a very bossy stage.

The fence guy is going to come today and put in the stakes and lines for the fence. Then they will start work for real on Monday. Bean will like that! I will be very glad to have this job done. I feel like once the pasture is sorted out I will be able to think about the barn - which needs a serious clean out, and make some good decisions about what direction I am going with the livestock.

Ok, once again not ready for school today, but I do at least feel like I slept well for a change!

Road - take your vitamins! I'll try to remember mine!

. Hi Road - just wanted to reply & send you some gratitude. I'm going to do a couple of things that need to be done during daylight, (time pressure, yikes) and it's almost 4 pm now! I'm going to post it here when I've gotten something done. Thanks for this nice piece of guidance - much appreciated! - Ella

. Lila, just wanted to say I appreciate your welcome message and very helpful reply! I actually have started with the overt trash! Sending you some gratitude! - Ella

Tatoulia, we'll said. I get it, and it seems like this will be more do-able already. more stuff outgoing; less stuff incoming! Thank you for your encouraging welcome!! All for now, because I'm pressed for time. - Ella

. Hi Subclinical, just wanted to reply. Thanks for your friendly welcome, and support! Seeing your words is making a difference. There's just something about this - even I have told myself some of these suggestions yet it seems so much more do-able & startable now. Much appreciated- Ella

I have been on the struggle bus this past week and end of last - can't remember - it's nothing terribly serious, just that there have been some good things and some glitchy things on roommate's home project front. The glitches have had a ripple effect.

I will get back to posting soon, and I'm happy to see that Road is back.

The screened in porch did get done and it's very nice. I'll get around to posting a pic on Instagram soon.

At the library again with my nice quiet genealogy room and big uncrowded table, working on transferring files to my new laptop. It's satisfying but not a fast process, as I'm dejunking along the way.

Hey, maybe working on this nice table will spur me to keep streamlining in other areas of life. My roommate is starting to go through her own papers and stuff that she hadn't had time to in all the hectic years of working a stressful job. That, too, is something that can get me motivated to do more on my own piles.

Pretty soon we'll make some dropoffs at the thrift shop, electronics recycling, etc. We're going to have to give up our single stream recycling service but may be able to take some presorted items to a place - this of course will need to be managed carefully so it doesn't contribute to clutter. And unfortunately the place is on the south side of town and we're north. So we won't be able to just nip over there frequently.

Really struggled getting going yesterday. Ended up taking some D & B & other vitamins. Sometimes when I'm in a pit I'm convinced it's a deficiency... I reduced my anti depressant because I started worrying it was causing my tinnitus. I haven't had an issue til yesterday so it's either not working at all or it's Working well enough. I was still kind of physically recovering also. After my son got home from school I had arranged for a visit from the "birthday bus" - some staff and volunteers from the special rec. came by and he got some balloons, a little choc. Cake, a goody bag, and they sang to him. He loved it. Then the H came home and took my son to visit his mom who's been in the hospital. She actually got hit by a car in her apt parking lot. She broke two ribs, her arm, and has a Concussion and a compression fracture in her back. We typically don't see her much due to her behavior, but she's been better lately, and the other son is in Hawaii right now. We have visited quite a bit, but even so she could do with more because she evidently has no friends whatsoever and she's lonely and she's also a little confused with the concussion... So while they were gone I got my second wind and did the kitchen. The dishwasher was run and emptied on Monday and yesterday the counter and the sink were already chock full of dishes again. So now I know. Two days to make a big mess. 30 minutes to clean. I even unloaded. I have been working on the kitchen a lot the past month or so. I have stocked dish towels in the pantry again (that seems like it's been ages)... I've been Gradually cleaning out the fridge one shelf at a time, washing cabinet and wall surfaces, and just did two of the windows... I'm taking pictures of everything - very motivating and helps with my memory. Bit risky though because my son could just randomly text some really embarrassing photos of my mess to my mother or a friend... but I gotta do what a gotta do.

Over and out for now. Hope everyone is having a good week,

Chores done, dinner eaten, dishwasher loaded and started.

Dh should be home soon.

His work schedule is just ridiculous.

I checked the weather and it has been updated to give me the weekend to dig my sweet potatoes - yay!

Good evening!

Road, I'm glad you are back posting! I hope you will go to tge doctor and get a good answer. I don't want you to suffer!

Another long day. Not hard, just long. School went well. And just now I finished the fencing work just as it got too dark to see. It is all ready for the fence guys - who will be here tomorrow, or next week, (or in November..)

I could have dug up some sweet potatoes if I hadn't made a stop on the way home, but honestly, that might have bern too much physical labor for one day. Tge fence was hard work.

What stop you ask? - goodwill. I bought a new cozy, thick men's flannel shirt to wear as a sweater/smock in my classroom. One of the ones I have is really getting too ratty, and I have decided I am tired of a courderoy one I used to wear, so that will go to the donate pile. Therefor, there is balance of shirts. (The ratty one will stay for home use)

Need to go do chores before it is truly dark, but wanted to check in and confess my shirt.

Carry on!

Good morning errbody. I've been up since 3:30 but I went to bed early so it's my usual amt of sleep, which is never enough. I have to go wake my son up in a minute. It's so early but I have to chuckle because I did it to myself. I fought to keep his foot in the door at the high school so my punishment is it's first period so we have to keep getting up at 6 instead of 8! Haha oh well.

Monday we went to the forest preserve with my brother and walked around the lake. Very pretty. I didn't eat any of the donuts or apples I brought because I keep having these crazy attacks... one theory is it's a birch pollen allergy that's attacking my gut instead of OAS, which is the way it's usually described. I have had reactions to plums, cherries, and now apples. I start to feel pain pressure in my chest that becomes severe over several hours. It sounds kind of like an esophageal spasm but not quite. I seem to get some relief from taking Benadryl and anti-gas OTC, but then it seems to repeat a few hours later and then I am wiped out for a day. Another theory is hiatal hernia? I had an er visit when I was up in Wisconsin and I suggested allergies and they went with that but I still don't really know what it is. Of course I need to go to the doc but * sigh * I hate them so much. Well, I gotta go wake up the kid. Hope to be back later,

Good morning! Where is everybody?

This is the 1000 post on this thread. I feel like it should be momentous, but it won't be.

I brought home ten pots last night from class. Some are good, some are ok, some I don't particularly like. I need to get a special blade for Dh dremel tool to fix some of them where there was dripping and sticking. One fell over.

My bp is still "let's keep an eye on it." My weight is 4 lbs higher at the doctor's office. I got a flu shot. I'm shrinking. I glazed my piece for the gas kiln. My classes are still fun and I am still tired.

Yesterday half of one class was absent. The other half is my beloved seniors. We were having a conversation that is not necessarily school appropriate - while they were working on projects (these kids ask me all kinds of things!) when one of them went out in the hall to get a drink and came back to report that a tour group was approaching. I said "right. So who wants to learn to use the angle cutter?" Because I was about to use it on something I was prepping for a demo in another class. They actually came up and gathered round and the tour group (and the admin staff leading them) got to see me doing a demo for a group of very intent teenagers. We were all very proud of ourselves and then one of them actually used the angle cutter on his project!

My two big tasks still remaining this week are to dig the rest of the sweet potatoes and finish disconnecting the fence line. It is supposed to rain all evening today. Maybe I will make pots or go to the studio after school and glaze. I signed up for the fall sale. I need to make a LOT of Christmas ornaments - they are my best seller and I think I am out. The sale is fast approaching!

Good morning. Obviously didn't proofread the last!

Finished the online thing last night.

School stuff together and ready to go in the car.

7 hours of sleep.

I need to put my new barn coat on, venture out in the cold, and get my chores done.

Then off to the doctor and school. Let's take a vote - will all the coffee I'm drinking to wake up and the worry about getting to school on time after my appointment help with my blood pressure?

After school I have the last session of my Tuesday class - kiln to unload and hopefully one thing to glaze for the gas kiln.

Home, chores, crash, another full school day tomorrow.

Tatoulua,

Of course it's ok. I would have laughed if he hadn't been so clearly distressed by it.

Good job on the laundry! I hope you gave a goid visit with your mom!

I ran a load of dishes, put half the laundry away, order some bulks nuts I need, and took care of part of a thing I need to do online.

Made Dh food - he's working overtime again, and dug sweet potatoes until it got too dark to tell the potatoes from the rocks.

Chores to do. Have to leave by 7:10 tomorrow with chores done, showered, and packed and ready for my whole day.

Ack! No time!

Yes I'm back this quickly. I did my sheets, towels, pjs, one light delicates and one load of dark delicates. The delegates are all hung up to dry. I'll have to fold my laundry and put it away.

One of the first things I learned here is the power of putting away the laundry. Life-changing.

I've emptied the dishwasher.

I will find the strength to go to mom's. I have to change the cat box and take my recycling out. So there's plenty of reason to do early. I also have to run up to BF's former business and maybe I'll stop by my car to put in the stuff for hazardous waste day (my old modem router thing that my internet company just replaced with a newer version. So far using the shredder at work is working out for me. I'm glad that at least for now, I have one fewer thing here. I feel sturdier but knowing I can use the city shredding every other month and use the shredder at work. One fewer appliance that is made cheaply and designed to break.

Im hoping to hear from my dr soon so I can start the injections.

The nurse at mom's facility just called. She said her place was broken into twice last night, and the person left a confession. She brought the confession with her and it was a note from my friend dated Febr 2021 and talking about the weather. Poor mom.

Okay I hope it's okay that I chuckled at your grandson not liking the tablecloth!

Road, I'm so grateful for the update! Good work!

Today I am working. I'm trying to find the strength to go visit mom after work. I really just want to lie down.

It's a little dark today. I have the fireplace on for kitty. I brought her bed out a week or so ago and she didn't like it. Last night she started cuddling in it and so I've moved the chair by the fireplace up give her a cozy place to nap. She breaks my heart.

My chicken pot pie is in the oven. I know I have to see mom. I just get so worn out but truly for no reason.

Fifth load of laundry is bring done as we speak. Fifth. I'm feeling strong.

Road, thanks for the lovely long update!

I'm so glad things are going well for your son! And wow! What a lot of progress!

When Dh is mad at me, everything is wrong. And we just couldn't seem to communicate to fix it. Today he is sorry. (I was sorry yesterday, but it doesn't do me any good to be sorry by myself.) I am also exhausted today. Bean is sleeping and there are a million things I should be doing, but I really just want to rest.

Bean and I did chores and went to the feed store, where the manager let him "drive" the forklift again. And we picked the big green pumpkin (the vine was killed by frost)and did some digging and a lot of reading. But he also threw a 30 minute tantrum because he doesn't like my new tablecloth.

Sigh. Something. Anything. One thing. Here I go..

Hi all, we are doing pretty well. The main updates are my son is living his best life with lots of extra curriculars & Rec activities. He starts his day at the high school for an acting class, then goes to the other school where they have a short daily community Outing which he loves. He went to the homecoming game and dance and got a kiss from his sweetheart. So cute. Health care for him is a mixed bag. I'm on top of some things, working on others, and totally dropping the ball on others. Same with my health. I have stayed on the kidney safe way of eating (with a few exceptions over vacay) but continuing to lose a little weight. But I have dropped the ball On follow ups with drs. As that triggers a lot of anxiety and avoidance.

Cleaning wise, there are some major shifts. I joined a couple Facebook hoarding clean up groups and started taking a lot of process photos which helps me a lot with motivation and accountability. Also one day I started stripping my sheets and the next thing I knew I wAs upending my room Moving the bed out, and the broken standing desk from the"back 40" to the front and just generally creating 86 more instant projects for myself... but no regrets! Sometimes I think the energy (and dust) gets so stale you just have to whip it up and get a fresh start. The H had to help then and we got my bed into my sons, threw his terrible mattress out, and I am still trying to figure out what to replace mine with - maybe a twin. As I sit now, on my right is my closet and dresser full of clean clothes, some folded, some hanging (what?!) and ok some in a pile on a little table. There's even a laundry basket (?!) with dirty clothes in it. On. My left is the repaired standing desk (just a 6' folding table on bed risers). It is fully functioning as an office and organizing space. Working printer, office supplies, Wall space I have to walk by 18x a day to tape things up I can't forget, and everything I need for my brain to have its best chance at working. I have my stitching stuff in one place, and all my genealogy stuff is in one place (my two hobbies)... the rest of the room would appear trashed to a normal person but it's actually a vast improvement... and there's a clear path to the door. That's where I started. I can still hear in my head "DEFEND the cleared spaces! HOLD THE LINE!!" Which of you geniuses said that? So key. Lastly, in the land of shared living spaces, I am making a lot of progress working on some adulting habits of daily cleaning tasks and mini projects. This is my focus right now rather than reducing the stored hoard. I am taking before and after pictures almost every day of the kitchen and working on dishes, or the fridge, or washing things down, or whatever... that's going really really well. And it's having some other beneficial effects I hadn't anticipated which is nice. I have had a little slide on over buying (needlework supplies & some unnecessary "deals" on school supplies) but as a result of sorting out my desk, I'm now back to tracking spending so I think that will help to check that. Oh, we also started using Truebill (my initiative to get the H off my back - haha) and within a few months discovered to my horror that I've been paying for two ink subscriptions as well as several subscriptions to things I had no idea I had. Hundreds of $$$ down the drain. Ugh. But so happy I caught it now. Could have gone on years!

So that's me in (as usual) a long winded tome.

Lila, sorry about your poor knee. Hope it gets better quickly. So discouraging when you're on a roll and you get side lined. Cm, I read back far enough to see there were exciting projects afoot at your house. Yeah! Subc, glad things are resolving with your mate. You guys are close I know and I'm sure that's even more upsetting when there's a rift. Tatoulia, you are so good with your mom. And glad to hear a little update on your day to day goings on.

Hope everyone here has a wonderful day!

Ella! Something you can try - I know it helps both Lila & myself - is to do something and then post what you did here. Doesn't matter, big or small. When I do that for some reason I am motivated to be able to say I did something and so I do it. I don't even think it's for positive reinforcement, it just helps to externalize the process a little - makes it more concrete for me? Touch base and let us know what you're thinking about today.

ROAD!!! Good to see you! How are you? How is your son?

I bet the flowers are pretty, SubC! What a nice thing. I'm glad your husband has stopped fighting.

Lila! NOOOOO! I am so sorry about your leg!

I didn't do a thing today in terms of housework. BF and I got together and went for a nice walk out of the city. Really nice day. We stopped at a farm stand and got apples and chicken pot pies. Then we went to his house and he made us sandwiches. I'll have my pot pie tmr. We also stopped to get mom a few supplies and went up to see her. She's now lost her purse in addition to losing her keys. I can't tell if she's lost it or if she's squirreled it away. Her place is so small, I don't know where it would be. I told her not to worry and she seemed okay.

Ok I'm truly going to try to go to bed early. We do not have tmr off. We now get Juneteenth off instead of Indigenous Peoples Day and I'm good with it.

Oh Lila,

I hope you heal quickly! My high functioning autistic kids are capable of understanding and doing the socially appropriate thing when told. I feel like someone needs to explain to your teen the very practical and honestly self serving reasons to help you.

Dh and I had several fights today, but he finally decided he didn't want to be mad at me anymore around dinner time.

In spite of fighting, we managed to get most of the fence work done, and I washed but didn't put away four loads of laundry, and washed and put away a load of dishes and washed another, and cleaned up the kitchen, but buried the scullery counter.

Some of my students gave me a pretty fall flower arrangement on Friday, and I have put the fall tablecloth on the table and it looks very nice.

Bean and I have a lot of baking and garden work to do tomorrow.

Okay. That was my update post. Now here is my productivity and accountability post.

Needs to be done but I cannot with the injury:
- mow lawn
- do laundry (stairs)

Needs to be done and I can do it pretty easily:
- paperwork
- emails, calls
- finish processing that produce so it doesn;t go bad after all that work I did! I made a spinach smoothie already. I will cook the greens so they don't get icky.
- put the rest of the cilantro and parsley away in a way they will stay fresh (need to pick out anything not great looking)

Needs to be done and maybe Son can help me:
- clip dog's nails, at least the front. I can't get down on the floor to do back paws
-brush dog

Also will ask Son to vacuum and fold towels.

I really hope I am not hurt for a long time.

hi Ella, and welcome! It is a complicated process, but for me, I always, always start with overt trash. I find it easiest to start with an empty kitchen trash bag or even grocery bag and just wander around each room putting trash in there. I am talking about stuff I have no emotional ties to and that is basically useless: wrappers, used tissues, empty cans or bottles, boxes. Just trash. Note, I do not recycle because you have to pay to recycle here (I do take large boxes and cardboard to the drop off site which is free) AND more importantly because I think it would cause me to save more things. I cannot add anything to my "reasons to save something" plate, so it all goes to trash. After that I glance around for things that feel easiest to donate and put them in a box and move it to my car. Sometimes I don't find anything. I also think it is good to start in the most impactful area, which might be kitchen, living room, bathroom or bedroom, depending on what you need and what is the worst. I hope you find this board helpful!

Road hi!! I hope you will fill us in on how you and your son are doing. We missed you!

Hello to Tatoulia and SubC! Glad to be back catching up with you. SubC, I hope DH has a heart softening and stops being mad at you. That's so draining.

I fell on Friday and am in a leg brace and in pain. It made me so sad. I was on a roll getting things done and had 2 days off to keep working. Now I lost those days, being at the ER and in pain and just exhausted, and now I am sorting what I can do and what I can't, and trying to get kids to help.

I had a grocery list made and Tot's dad went and got a few things for me. He also is picking up the pet food today and bringing it over.

Son 2 works evenings so sleeps a lot in the day and it is sooo hard for me because I need help and he is asleep. Teen also is asleep in the day a lot. This morning Teen was up but about to go to bed. I asked them to help me with a few things: ice for my leg, bring up laundry, get me a few things. They did it, but with the most exasperated, annoyed, inconvenienced stomping eye rolling attitude that when they went down to go to bed, I sat here and cried. It feels so terribly lonely to have two kids living here and yet I am dragging my leg around trying to feed dogs and let them out, and Teen can't be the slightest bit compassionate and is so irritated to have to do anything for me. I know it's the autism I guess but I feel so alone. For someone whose life revolves around helping everyone else in need and taking care of others, it is a crushing sadness to be alone and in pain and need a glass of water and no one is here to get it for me.

Okay, enough of the whining, I will be fine and when my son wakes up I know he will help me.

Road!

Don't worry about catching up, just tell us what us up with you!

A couple of sentences is fine if you don't have time!

Tatoulia, yay on the medication approval!

It's a gorgeous day, but I am miserable because Dh is mad at me.

It was a nice surprise to come here and see road.

Hey guys, just checking in. I miss you all. I am making pretty good progress.life is lifey! Welcome to Ella. 💕 I haven't been around for a few months so no clue what's going on with everyone. Hugs all around.

Lila, congratulations on the successful stove situation! Wow! I know that was stressful and I'm so pleased with the outcome!

What a kind thing for you to say, SubC. I do tend to out my mind to things and get them done. I cannot believe that I went from a lot of credit card debt (I'm afraid to say the number but huge, HUGE) to no credit card debt, no mortgage, and a healthy savings account. From a disgustingly cluttered and dirty apartment to a lovely home. Although my hoarding tendencies go back a really long time, my apartment was hellish for about six years, I think. Maybe seven. Cluttered before that but not hellish. Glad that is back behind me where it belongs.

I will put my mind to losing the weight. I received a call and an email from my health plan saying that a medication had been approved. That must be the shots right? My doctor hasn't called me yet so I do not know where any of this stands. But it will come together next week, I have confidence.

I slept most of the day. I don't know why. I was feeling a bit under the weather yesterday, which I attributed to the flu shot. So I had a hard time getting up even when BF tried at 1130. I did get up but even coffee and juice didn't help So I fed the kitty and slept the rest of the day. I got up around 7 to go get some things for mom and had her meet me downstairs so I could stay away. Now I'm showered and ready for bed.

Good morning!

Crispy fall day and I really just want to build a fire and curl up inside and rest a while, but I need to head back to the wood kiln in an hour. And at least start the laundry before I go.

Meeting with the fence guy went well - he might not start until next week, which will be fine. I'm pretty excited about the fence.

Lila, I really hope your teen stays inspired by the new clean space. I'm sure there will be some backsliding, but it would be wonderful if the two of you could work together toward keeping things up. It would free up so much of your energy! And how nice tgat you got positive feedback and quality time!

Produce always takes longer than you think, and I'm impressed that you cleaned up as you went!

I am not excited by garbage trucks. Garbage is still the biggest stumbling block for me - garbage = failure in my mind, I either allowed myself to acquire a thing that was wasteful or I failed to care for a thing that could have been kept in use or recycled. In an ideal world, everything that I was done with would be composted, recycled, or passed on to someone else who could use it.


Tatoulia, I believe you will reconquer the weight. You always impress me when you set your mind to something.

Welcome, Ella. Listen, I'm on Hoarding Maintenance. It is definitely possible. I have cleaning ladies every week. I do no cleaning. My only job is to make sure that more stuff goes out than comes in. Over 4 years of maintenance. It's possible.

Dear Lila and SubC, I'll catch up with you soon.

Lila, you did great!

I just have a minute, so I want to greet Ella!


Ella, start anywhere! Maybe you need to stop or slow the inflow, maybe you need one small clean space, maybe you just need to get rid of one item, or clean out a drawer, or make a path.

Wherever you are, whatever seems manageable or rewarding, start there. Just start! No job is too small! Come back and tell us about it and we will cheer you on!

Hi,please help! this is my first time here. Just found this site and chat room today.
So. wouldn't it be nice to just know where to start, cleaning up, purging, and managing?
Wouldn't it be nice to just briefly, finitely, acknowledge there's been some crap going on, then _shift_? As in shift to a balanced, productive perspective that helps get the cleanup done?
I'm so impressed by what you all are doing and saying! I need to re-start my cleanup of my apartment, after backsliding. Well really it's been 2 backslides. Just wish I could prevail over whatever is in my head or heart that results in these full-house messes! After reading some of the pages on the main part of hoardingcleanup.com, it's easy to agree about the triggers and risk factors. which definitely describe me. But then, what will work.
I started down the slippery slope of filling up my condo too much. That was over fifteen years ago, and started after a divorce, deaths in the family, illness, custody suits, and more. After working with some pros, during a couple of different phases, I backslid. I wish this was like Weightwatchers where you reach your goal and then you get to switch to their maintenance program and it mostly works (free or almost free!).
These past five weeks I've been healing from some intense recent things: falling-related injuries, a vicious dog attack (miraculously I didn't get bitten), a fibro-/chronic fatigue flare-up and finding ways to win out over a constant fainting issue. Well, really just halfway fainting, which is slightly less menacing but halfway blacking out constantly is something I've made progress with lately. Big, big gratitude here. This recent one-month backslide is just after working with a pro organizer off-and-on, which was maybe just a 15-20-25% cleanout. Oh boy I do I not like admitting this stuff. Ugh.
So. wouldn't it be nice to just know where to start, with cleaning up, purging, and managing?
Wouldn't it be nice to just briefly, finitely, acknowledge there's been some crap - triggers - going on, then _shift_? As in shift to a balanced, productive perspective that helps get the cleanup done? We all or almost all have setbacks in life yet some of us seem to have a slow learning curve with this stuff.
Would anyone have anything to say as to where to start? Or how to win out over whatever's in one's head or heart that is related to the hoarding?

Progess update:

Here's what I've done since the last post:

- Got ALL the produce out of the fridge and boxes
- sadly, tossed a few things too far gone
- pulled bad leaves off lettuce, cabbage, greens, herbs
- took all bad stuff out of fridge. Filled the trash can and asked son to take it out
- wiped out the fridge shelves and organized it
-made a grocery list
- posted some of the extra produce for free online and a lady is coming to pick it up. I am about to box it for her
- trimmed collards and they are soaking in the sink
- sorted cabbages and found a cabbage soup recipe
- cut ends of wilted herbs and put them in a glass of water to refresh them
- kept the kitchen clean as I did all this

Hey that's a lot of progress!

Does anyone else get excited and run to the window when they hear the garbage truck coming? Every week I run over and feel almost gleeful as the full bins get dumped. It feels like I am losing weight! And now there are fresh empty bins waiting to be filled!

Today's progress:

This morning I:
- took out the kitchen trash, bathroom trash, and a box and put the bins by the road for pickup

-went outside and trimmed the roses and other plants, picked up a few branches and stuff and filled the other bin with them

- unloaded and reloaded the dishwasher
- did a swipe of the counters to keep them nice
- decided to run the Self Clean option on the stove to see if it gets the terrible inside clean. It takes hours so it is still running.

I am struggling with focus and goals, so I am going to have some breakfast and coffee and then:

- find recipes for the extra produce I have and make some soup and stuff, probably using the crockpots

- get my separation paperwork started. I have been putting this off and ex says it has to be done now.

- calls, emails, etc that need to be done before the weekend

What are you all doing today?

Your birthday sounds lovely, SubC. I'm glad your family took good care of you!

I too have had SAD in the winter. When I moved north (here) it was very bad. I started taking D3 every fall (and a bit in summer to keep it up), and got a Day Light I used to eat breakfast in front of, and that helped. Now I don't need the Day Light, but I got a Sunrise Clock that I can set to gradually light up my room over 30 or 60 minutes until it is bright like the sun. It is GREAT in the winter and wakes me up much earlier than I would otherwise. I start using it usually around November.

So sorry about the health stuff Tatoulia. I too need to lose weight. You know SubC and I were posting on the other thread, Decluttering your waistline. Maybe we all 3 could start posting there again for support.

I threw everything into boxes and put them in the guest room, washed down all the counters, wiped appliances, burned a candle... it was a mad stash and dash but I was done approx 1 minute before the stove guy knocked on the door! And he did bring his wife so THANK GOODNESS I cleaned. It still looks like I've let things go. Cabinets need cleaned, walls, etc, but it was presentable.

After they left, Teen came upstairs and walked into the dining/kitchen and said "This is amazing!"

Now I have informed both Teen and Son that they will HAVE to keep it like this, that there are NO dishes allowed overnight in bedrooms, and that they MUST put all their dirty dishes in the dishwasher every day so I can run it at night and unload it in the morning. I told Teen that if this rule is not followed, all the dishes will go back into my bedroom and they will get one plate one bowl one cup. I brought out most of the dishes from my room (only the plastic ones... still not ready for breakables) and they were so happy we made brownies together. AND cleaned up the mess together.

I hope we can keep it this way. They totally clean kitchen table and bar/counter are so so nice.

We shall see what happens, SubC. I'm nervous about all of it and yet excited to get my life back.

Just cleaned kitty's box and will leave for work. See you all later! Keep up the good work!

And no, I won't have any clothes to wear to work this winter. But I'll go slowly with this.

Oh dear Tatoulia!

I am worried that your doctor was that concerned and at the cost. I hope your insurance will pay for it.

I go for my physical next week. Technically it should be my "annual" physical, but it is actually my first visit since the original covid quarantine. I'm a bit nervous about how my bp is going to look.

My house is a bit of a mess from my "party" last night. Dishes and toys. But I need to get ready for school.

Straight from school to my woodfiring for class and home late. Tomorrow is fence guy and another woodfiring shift, and Sunday we've got to get the rest of the fence down, so things show no hope of slowing..

I'm just going all in on people and things that won't come back around this year.

Yesterday I was driving home and thought that I could make a small detour and visit goodwill for a 1/2 off birthday shopping trip. Then I thought that I could also use the daylight to work on fence tear down. I asked myself what the odds were that there would be something at goodwill that I wanted more than I want that fence done. And I kept driving.

This is week 5 of school. I only have 31 more weeks with my seniors! It is flying.

Happy birthday, SubC! Sounds like you had a great day!

I took the afternoon off and went for annual physical. My weight is atrocious. So much more than I imagined and the hugest ever. Truly frightening. Doctor us suggesting I take weekly injections, that's how bad my weight is. She's seeing if my insurance will pay. If not, they are $900 (not sure of the increment, is that one week or one month) and money I am nit prepared to spend. I already have one med that I pay 165 a month for. We shall see.

I got my flu shot, had my pelvic exam, and my blood drawn. They didn't have the latest covid booster. I'll have to try to get that soon. She told me I can skip the mammogram if I like.

At least I walked to and from dr, which gave me 4 miles. I met boyfriend afterward and then we visited mom. She was downstairs, having someone give her my phone number because she forgot it. She'd also lost her keys, so while she and BF talked, I went up to her apartment. No luck on the keys but I changed the cat box and took out her garbage.

I feel so sorry for her. I'll try to stop by tmr night and watch a show. Her apt was boiling hot. She didn't realize she had the heat on. She did have a window open and the fan on. I don't know where she hid her keys. BF and I put some money in her purse so she can go to the cafe next door and get bagels with lox.

Lila, praying the stove situation goes well for you. I feel your pain.

Oh, on the days - are you familiar with seasonal effective disorder? It's something I struggle with and might be worth talking to your gp about.

In my case b vitamins, diet, and lights help somewhat - getting outside as much as possible too.

Thanks Lila,

I hope you got sone rest.

I had a very good day.

Talked to the fence guy this morning and he will be coming Saturday morning to finalize plans and starting some time next week.

My mom sent a lovely card and a check to take myself shopping (technically from my dad too, but he had more to do with the check than the card. He's not a birthday guy.)

Classes went well, staff appreciated the cake, afternoon classes enjoyed the cake, a former student came by and hung out for a bit.

Dh gave Dd a "blank check" and she picked up and assembled dinner and dessert at several lovely little local shops after work and then the boys (dh, dsil, bean) all joined us here for dinner. (Not excessive, but very nice - Dd knows how to shop. We even had a discount bottle of Champaign.) She said "I saw this and it was on clearance and has bubbles in it and I thought - perfect for Mom's birthday!" Besides dinner I was gifted three baby holly trees dsil potted up for me from volunteers.

Fed Bean way too much sugar, played with him for a couple of hours, and then kissed him and sent him home.

Ds and ❤️Dd called, and my best friend sent the traditional long birthday email. (His bday is exactly six months from mine, so we keep up with each other with long updates back and forth in the month after our birthdays, post Christmas greetings, and the occasional summer contact.)

Now I am tired and not prepared for tomorrow, but as always I'm sure I'll figure it out and it will be fine.

Happy birthday SubC!! I hope you have a good day. I get very tired in the late fall and winter as the light gets less. Do you think that's part of it? I have to take vitamin D3 or I get pretty depressed.

The stove guy is not an actual stove guy or I wouldn't care. He is a friend, and his wife is a friend, and whether she comes with him or not, I would be appalled to have him know how bad I let me house get. He is the kind of guy who might even go put together a 'work party' of my OTHER friends and tell them I need help cleaning my house - without asking me. So I have to make it decent.

I worked for hours already, he will be here in 45 minutes. I am so tired. It is a lot better but still well below what I would call "standard" clean for most people. The stove itself is at about 90% on the outside. The inside is terrible. I wiped the door but don't have time to actually clean it. I have the table 75% cleared off but not the counter/bar. I sat down to take a 5 minute break, but I am getting boxes and throwing everything from the bar/counter in them and shoving them all in the guest room (which was my son's room but he switched so now it is about to become a storage room). Here goes a massive stash n dash! All I want to do is have an empty surface that I can wash off. Ugh I need to burn candles in here or something, too.