Getting started is the hardest. Not being able to make decisions about where to put what I decide to keep. storage unit? Buy another storage shed? Now since son won't be working for a while we may be trying to just move to North Carolina. just indecision and confusion.

Dianne,
Thanks so much for sharing your journey process.

Good afternoon all. Thanks Karl for suggestion. Just paid bills online and checked to make sure, and it appears bank paid bill on time, so I will call.
I worked all morning in freezer room, organized more stuff and found more to donate and toss. Nailed up a rack with holes for different sized hand tools, keep losing hammers etc. so want to know they are on rack. Amazing how fast the time went. I am happy with what I got done, but it is already 90 degrees. so zaps my energy.
A friend asked me to join her on Saturday morning for a shopping trip, I waited for several hours then said no. Did not want to disappoint her, truth is, crowds bug me and shopping just to shop is not good for me.
Glad to hear you are taking a day off Tillie, you have been through a lot.

So happy to hear your energy is back, Tillie, and that you feel like yourself again! Diane, I'm glad you have your schedule. I find that when I don't know my schedule, I feel like I can't make any plans or accomplish anything til I know what my week wi!l look like. I hate feeling like I'm being held hostage by the unknown and am actively working to break that pattern of mine

Dianne, I understand your fears of backsliding. I have to fight to see my living spaces as they are, so I don't let things creep back in. I really just open my eyes and look. I am amazed that dining room table clutter free, nothing on the floors in any room, things put away....but wait, what's that pile of papers on my end table? I will attend to that now.

Have a wonderful day, all. Keep up the good work!

just got home from going to a friends house that I work with. She graciously printed off my schedule for me, she is very computer literate. I am so relieved to have my schedule and know I will have enough work.
Visited with friend and her husband for over an hour, it was so pleasant in their big bag yard. He picked me some plums and tomatoes to take home, such nice people. His mom is the woman I visited in Nursing home, now in assisted living, she will not leave her room so I plan to go tomorrow and sweet talk her into a little movement and fun. Will make me feel better to make her feel better.
It is going to be hot tomorrow so plan to patch roof first thing tomorrow, too hot today. Wanted to do housework first today so would get it done. Tat, congrats on clean kitchen. Thanks all for sticking with this site.

Just a quick hello to everyone to tell you how much I appreciate your wisdom and candor and friendship. I just got home and upon walking into my clean kitchen, I felt good about myself. I'm not done by any means but I could have just about anyone in my house right now. They'd have to use Diane's or Tillie's bathroom, however.


I vow to work on my dreaded closet. I am almost out of excuses. I can hear Tillie's words echoing in my head, you will be glad once you've reclaimed that space.

Take care, all. Stay strong. Special wishes to Bitsy. Click the link, make the calls, and get some help. We will stand by your side step by step.

Hi Bitsy :)
At the top of this page "click" on "National Resources" and then "click" on your state.
Call the companies listed and interview them.
Ask them all the questions you can think of.
Ask them to explain exactly what they will do for you.
The three companies listed have been found to be reputable and there have so far been no negative reviews of them.
It seems that having a professional company clear out the house would solve quite a few of your problems, like time and money once the place is sold.
(((hugs)))

bitsy, your honesty is inspiring. Did you look at the tabs at the top of this page, has resources for helping clean out houses. Great idea to pay to have cleaning company clean it out, have it done, and sell house.Hard to focus on your needs when you are taking care of so many people! Take good care of yourself.

Hi everybody. My son is out of the hospital on the 21st. Things are not great. We are staying in a $200.00 a week extended stay motel. trying to figure out what to do and how to get it done. He is not in as much pain but is having trouble getting supplies for colostomy and wound care. The bottom part of his surgical wound reopened while he was still in the hospital. it is about the size of a half dollar and is draining. He is also trying to apply for Medicaid and other assistance since he is not insured and will not be able to work till after the reverse surgery in December and it's already been a month since he was able to work. zero income.

So we have not been over to the SE metro Atlanta house to make "goat paths" from front door to "his" two rooms and bathroom. We have gone over long enough for me to take care of the 2 cats. Hopefully, when I get time I can pay neighbor guy to help with that. soon.
Meanwhile, I am paying all the bills for both houses. the other one in NE metro Atlanta about 45 minutes away. and food, gas for car etc. etc.

Just so the new people know my situation. I am 70 yrs old. have trouble walking more than about twenty feet at a time do to circulation problems. and other medical problems. The last 5 to 7 yrs I have spent time and money helping 6 unemployed adult close relatives and 2 infant, now preschool great grand-kids, through the bad economic times. ("good excuses" for being distracted from my own issues).

So now I have two 7 room houses, one with basement and one with large storage shed, both full of stuff and trash. I have been overwhelmed and depressed forever. Something is always happening. When I first found this sight (maybe in June) I was trying to decide what professional company I thought I could trust to help me de-hoard the NE Metro house so I could try to sell it. Property tax statement just came in the mail. $2000.00+. $1000.00+ due by end of September other half due in November.


Anyway this is getting too long and we have to get going. But It seems like maybe Dianne and Roxie and maybe some others know something about choosing and working with professionals. and not stressing out because I can't do baby steps or go slowly. I don't know anywhere else to turn for support and advice.

Dianne I am so grateful to read your post and how beautiful your house is again and the happiness you and daughter can have in your clean house. I have had a difficult time with maintenance, which is why I fear the hoard will return in living area, so I can relate. Would hiring a cleaning woman 2 times a month solve that for you?
Tillie soooooo happy your self esteem returned, funny how we feel bad and don't know why, then when feel better it is an ah-ha moment. You deserve to have a clean no clutter house and plenty of time to be creative and have fun.
Ok, for me, difficult time sleeping last night so finally got up at 5am. Decided to first do the dishes that have piled up past few days, 2 drainers full, all done. Since I had rubber gloves on, why not clean bathroom. Thoroughly cleaned floor, toilet, sink counters, mirrors, felt good to keep going even when I wanted to stop several times. I know I often quit after the difficult stuff is done, but I talked myself into finishing, reminded myself over and over, I am changing that habit.
Got through one pile of papers, got bills ready to pay. Last month phone bill, which I pay online was one day late and I was charged $6.00 late fee. Bank must have sent it late, who knows, it really upset me knowing I had paid it on time. I just got this months in mail yesterday and I usually pay as soon as I get the bill. Last night friend I work with said she is giving more clinics to to women that are having financial difficulties. Both of those women have other jobs, they just complain about bills more than I do. My SS is under $600 a month after insurance is taken off, so I know I need work more than others do. I was sad and hurt because I usually get first choice because I have worked with her the longest of any of the other nurses. I did say, I usually get first choice of clinics, she said she just feels so sorry for them. She sent me schedule after we spoke. I can not open the attachment so do not know how many clinics I have, just the anxiety of not knowing makes my stomach hurt. Last night I asked her to send it, not as an attachment, just checked, no response. I count on that work every fall, so am scared.
I have to let go and focus on finishing projects today. After I feel calm I can phone her and ask her to read me my schedule. Ok, off to work for me

Good Morning Everybody! :D

Had some unexpected but very welcome rain last evening.
It was opening day for BURNING MAN festival and they received a lot of rain out in the Black Rock desert, but the festivities will still go on.

burning man

The people travel right through my area to get there and again to leave.
I enjoy talking to them and they come from all over the world.
This is the "last stop" on the way there to buy food and water and gasoline.

Yesterday I watered everything outside then came in and cleaned the house properly.
Not just kinda/sorta dabbed at it.
Half way through cleaning I started to feel real good emotionally.
Stopped & thought about it and discovered that my self esteem had returned.
Didn't even realize that I had lost it. Just knew I was very depressed.
But now I'm back to more normal, well, normal for me anyway. :)

So GREAT to read the posts this morning! :D

Time for me to get moving, the washing machine is done, need to hang wash & start on some more wash loads.
The cats are fed their breakfast.
The usual daily tidy ups need doing and I have work/play projects I am looking forward to getting to.

TTYL :D

Happy Monday evening.

I just got back from a gathering of friends and family members of my loved one who passed away last week. There were some people I hadn't seen in literally over a decade, and it was wonderful to finally see one another face to face again. Rather than being a time of crying, the gathering was fairly joyful (as these things go). The actual funeral service is likely to be more somber, of course.

Most of my posted goals for yesterday got shifted to today. Got some of them done while on chat this afternoon. Also got a little bit of kitchen work done.

Melody, I'm glad you're joining us here on the message board!

I probably won't get much done tomorrow in terms of clutter and cleaning because of family matters. I hope to get back on a more regular schedule starting Wednesday or Thursday.

Hugs to all.

Hello everyone! Diane, what a lovely day you had! I hope you stayed peaceful and avoided the roof! That was such a nice picture you painted of walking around the lake with your friend.

Melody, during my recent de cluttering, (which I secretly call "de-sh*#%£ing the house,") I got rid of many, many cards and letters. I had this moment where I realized I was keeping them to prove that I was loved. And so, I was able to throw out cards from the bookkeeper at my job from 20 years ago, when I had my appendix out (that's an extreme example, of course, but it is something I'd kept all these years) as well as scads of Christmas and Birthday cards. I was able to get rid of almost all of them. Kept one from my father, one from each grandmother, and pretty much tossed the rest. I don't know your reasons for hanging into the paperwork, but honestly, for me,as soon as I realized my reasons for keeping these things that clutter my life, I was free. I feel very lucky and don't even miss a one.

Tillie, I so wanted to clean my bathroom today but day got away from me. All trash is out, all recyclables out, had to throw out plants on window boxes (too gangly) and vacuumed bedroom. Kitchen still clean and orderly. What a pleasure to cook and not have to move the piles from the stove. Nothing on the counters or stove, and nothing in the sink. Another moment of freedom. Then went to my mother's to help her with an unexpected problem.

Much love to everyone. Hope to hear from you soon.

Hello all. Tillie happy to hear you are feeling better, since you are doing a lot today, I assume you are feeling good.
Welcome Melody. Hi Tat.
Today I went with friend to lake and walked around it. The day was so beautiful, perfect weather, which is rare this summer. So wonderful being out in nature, very few people there, just a great day. When we got back to her house I discovered her dog had fleas, she took him to the coast last week and he was acting strange. It is rare to have fleas on high desert, any home remedies? we put some lavender oil on hair, I know bugs do not like lavender, I think she has to get flea powder.
Since I have been home, been just sitting. Perhaps no work here today, was hoping to go on roof, and here I sit. Maybe taking today off is fine, will be eager to work on roof tomorrow. Plan to put tv in kitchen to motivate me to do dishes and finish some things in there tonight. I feel peaceful and content after being at the lake. Tillie you are so right to remind us to have balance in our life. Sure hope this week is better than last for you tillie. You are such a help to us. hugs

Thanks, Tatoulia, for the congrats and the welcome. :D

Thank you, Karl! I will indeed try to be here Tuesday night. And will stop by in the meantime.

Tillie, I appreciated this morning's "Remember to smile and laugh as you work through things today." I needed that.

Today I worked my way through several shoe boxes stuffed with paper junk (old bills & such) and a suitcase full (35-year accumulation) of greeting cards & letters. Hooray for progress! There's still soooo much yet to be done, but hey... baby steps, right?

One day at a time...

Good morning, Tillie. Glad you have cooler weather. We've enjoyed a fairly mild summer in the east but this week heating up to the 90s. I think I'll follow your lead today and clean bathroom. I'll report back on my progress!

Congratulations, Melody, on your pregnancy AND on finding this group. You've come to the right place. The support I've gotten here allowed me to make drastic changes in the amount of stuff I have. And I had a lot, believe me. And before I found this group, I had cleaned out a trash hoarder's apartment (it took me six weeks of daily visits--but could only do a few hours at a time since I couldnt/wouldn't/shouldn't use his bathroom).

Glad to see you here!

Hello, everyone! Melody in northwest Arkansas. Hoarder & child of hoarder (my mother).

I'm 19 weeks pregnant (my husband & I have been married 11 years now, but this will be our firstborn), and I'm trying not to panic about my clutter situation. I still have so much to do before this baby comes! I have GOT to clear out a LOT more space than I have thus far. I try to get a little bit done every day, but don't feel like I'm making enough progress. It's such a massive, daunting task... and most days I just feel completely overwhelmed.

I was able to "attend" the beginning of tonight's meeting/chat but then lost my connection (we've got satellite internet out here). I've just discovered this support group and I'm so glad to have found it... I am in dire need of some support, encouragement, and inspiration... and I am already finding that here. I mean, don't get me wrong -- my husband is plenty supportive... but he doesn't truly understand what it's like, mentally / emotionally, dealing with all this STUFF. As I read through some of the threads on these message boards, I am already feeling "at home" here. :)

So nice to "meet" you all.

ROXIE, THANK YOU FOR POSTING! I MISSED YOU AND WAS CONCERNED.

Good to catch up on everyone's posts. Yesterday I made no progress on my place but I did get family obligations taken care of and spent time with a girlfriend. Today I dealt with a bag of stuff I'd thrown in my closet about two, three years ago. Wasn't as bad as I'd built it up in my mind and 80% can go to goodwill. Keeping only four silk scarves and some antique embroidered quilt squares. The rest is leaving town today. My brother will take me to goodwill. I could take myself but my brother is isolated and it gives him something to do. So I get things out of my house and he gets himself out of his house. Frequently we stop for a cool drink such as a seltzer so it gives us a nice little outing.
Also, when I have heavy stuff I appreciate the door-to-door service!
Again, happy to hear from you all and celebrating your victories with you! Thanks for helping me to get myself moving!!!

Good morning! So great to hear from everybody. Roxie, we've missed you so much, and it's so great to know that you are well enough to be posting again! Many, many, many, many hugs! Thinking about you and your situation, bitsy! Tillie, I'm glad you have a new laptop! I hope you really enjoy it! diane, I'm glad to know you are taking more and more steps to have fun! I'm glad you tried the "boiling water on the ants" technique. I'd been meaning to suggest that one. Hope it helps.

I have a lot of other comments I'd like to make to others, but I'll save them for now. Still dealing with details related to the upcoming funeral for my relative. It will be held early this week. In part because of preparation for the funeral and in part because of other (more upbeat) reasons, I might not be at chat tonight. We'll see. I do hope the new people who joined us Tuesday night are able to come to tonight's chat!

I spent much of the day away from home yesterday and didn't get a lot of cleaning or decluttering done. (Got a little laundry dealt with, but not much else.) Did get a fair amount of cleaning and maintenance work done the two previous days, though, with the help of those on chat. Today, I plan to add to my gratitude list, spend some more time cleaning out my vehicle, make sure I have appropriate clothes ready for the services, and spend some more time scanning some family pictures. I will probably also get together with family members today, as I often do on Sunday.

Have a great day, everyone!

I got a phone call so sent last post before I was done, since I learned to send sooner or can lose post. This morning I worked in yard a little, had some fun, then thought, I would try using a newer cement like duct sealant to make rock sculptures. I did several and had so much fun. Went up on roof and poured a gallon of water on the roof where I thought the leak was coming from. I was wrong. Decided I really did not want to work today so that is why I did the rocks, just time to have some fun before I get too frustrated. I called a friend and cleared up some things that caused some discomfort, worked out great, feel close again and we are going to a lake on Monday and walk around it, maybe 3 miles, will be good to be in nature, been too long.
I did vacuum walkway and freezer room Walkway had gotten junk on it when ripping off roof crap, some blew into freezer room, and from my shoes. I finished putting roofing into garbage cart that was in front, so that is clean now. There is more in back yard in a pile. I have sprayed all the red ant mounds in back yard and driveway. Also poured boiling water on them. Neighbor used gasoline on his.
Pulled more weeds in driveway.
did dishes this morning but already have a few more to wash.
Cut chicken off my bird I bought at Costco Thursday. Froze some and am boiling the rest off now. Will let it cool, then make soup tomorrow. Guess I have actually done a few things, just feel like until I finish patching roof it won't count. I have to drill holes to put screws in metal roof cap, and that is what is stalling me on new metal roof. Finding the leak and patching it on trailer roof is the other thing that is bothering me. So happy I went to art fair yesterday and enjoyed my yard and rocks today, balance is important. So happy we have this support group

Best part of my day was reading your note Roxie. I think of you every day and was hoping you were in hospital getting healthy. So relieved to hear you are home and know to take it easy. No smoking by oxygen, that is what I feared happened when you did not post for days, so relieved you are ok.
I have heard several people say they are watching marathon netflix this week.
Today I was drinking my smoothie in lounger on deck while doing soduko puzzle, and knocked over full smoothie, it flew everywhere. I immediately cleaned it all up, moved the lounger, and realized I never did finish scraping and painting deck under recliner. So I scraped and painted that area. Worried ants will come and find smoothie that dripped through boards on deck, at least I cleaned all off deck as soon as I could, just can not get under deck, boarded all in.

Haha-I wrote take cats instead of take care. I do love cats!

WELCOME HOME, Roxie!!! Baby steps! Wish I were there to help you with your groceries and other things.

Glad to hear from Tillie as well! I binged watched Vreaking Bad so understand the fun that can be!

Will write more later on--just finished seeing Mom and taking her for groceries, then seeing ill family member and taking him groceries, now hanging out with BF before meeting a friend for afternoon tea

Take cats, everyone!

Happy to hear the job is going well, Barb. Re the toilet seat, I bet it will be easier for you to keep clean and keep the bathroom clean if you feel you have the right toilet seat. Sometimes "hating something" like particular carpet or dresser, can give me a ready-mades excuse for not keeping it clean and clutter free. Right now the only thing in my house that bugs me is a chair in my library area. It's nice and all, I'm just not crazy about it. I have a plan, though, and I'm keeping it free of clutter in the meantime.

Sticking to emptying my dishwasher and keeping all dishes out of sink. Ditto folded laundry. What a pleasure! Going to be another cool day in the Northeast. Hot days such as your weather, Barb,really take it out of me!

Wishing everyone a wonderful Saturday!

Good morning, everyone
I had a good week at work. Settling into a new routine can be tiring, but the workload and pace are manageable and people continue to be friendly and helpful.
Last night the young man mowed for me. I had to pay him extra. With all the rain we had over the past week, the grass was quite tall. It was very hot last night and he missed several spots and did not trim, but it is done and I won't get a ticket from the city.
I have not been able to make much headway on the clutter this week and was not able to have any workmen out. When the kitchen faucet was opened, the box contained the wrong one, so we had to contact the distributor and send it back. They discontinued making the easy-clean toilet seats I like. I was able to purchase one new one and had to persuade Lowe's to let me buy their display model off the wall at a reduced price. The other stores in town do not carry it. It is a little scuffed up, but I think a little Bar Keeper's friend should fix it. I know I am a little OCD, but I want my toilets to match.
This weekend, I will trim and weed outside, clean the kitchen and bathrooms, and start again on decluttering. I will need to pace myself. I have air conditioning , but temperatures will continue to be in the high 90s and it is easy to overdo.
Have a great weekend, everyone. Stay cool. I will check in Sunday night.

Oh boy things are unsettled for you, Karl. I hope you and your housemates are able to find a solution quickly.

Diane, I haven't felt like posting all week because I haven't done anything. I just think that we need to be fair with ourselves. We do a lot and as hoarders, it's not just about hard physical work, it's about hard emotional work. How'd we let it get so bad, how can we let go of this thing or that thing, why'd we spend so much money on useless stuff. We struggle and we cope and we work hard. Certainly we deserve to take a break without treating ourselves so unfairly.

Who knows what tomorrow will bring? Hopefully energy and a forgiving spirit.

Goodnight, dear friends.

Thanks for saying hello Tat. I feel so much better hearing from you and that I am not alone being lethargic this week, please do go to doctor. I watered things outside tonight and watched a show on PBS was feeling frustrated that I did not do more, then read your post and feel like forgiving myself and knowing tomorrow will be better. Hugs

Good to hear from you, Diane. I too haven't gotten any measurable work done this week. Glad to hear that you've been to the doctor! I'll try to use that to motivate myself to get to the doctor myself! I am exhausted,barely making it home from work before falling asleep for three hours at a stretch! It feels like thyroid meds are due for an adjustment. I am maintaining my house, however, so I'll take some solace in that. But honestly,without making forward progress, I feel like I'm not getting any thing done. Good for you Diane for getting a donation bag together AND getting some fun time in!

Let's not beat ourselves up for not getting as much done as we would've liked.

Thinking of you Diane and all of our friends here. Glad also to hear from LR. Missing Tillie, Barb, Bitsy, Karl, Dianne, Roxie and anyone I've neglected to mention. Check in when you can.

my long post did not post so will make this short, Tillie and LR and Tat, hope you have a good weekend
Ups and downs here, took donations to thrift store
Went to art festival by the river in Bend today, excellent art, so nice
Went to new doctor, wonderful woman.
Not much progress this week
dishes done

Good morning. Things are slowing down a bit today for me. (Well, I'm expecting to be busy, but it's more of a "flexible schedule" kind of busy.) My relative's funeral will be held early next week, fyi.

I had decided to look in my parents' house for some old photos of that relative (pictures from her younger days) that I could scan and send to her family. A container that had some of these old pictures (and yes, I did find some good ones) also has some of those not-so-beloved silverfish in it. Been reading on the Internet about how to get rid of those little critters. It's always good for me to have more incentives to clean and declutter.

Happy day. Hugs.

Sending you warm wishes, Tillie. I "channel" you every day when I defend my progress...of course, I'm merely defending against myself, which is easier than defending against someone else. Still, I am a formidable opponent and must take the time to fight the urge to just leave this or that, there and there.

Hope everyone is doing well. I haven't done anything new but haven't backslid.

Hi :)

Sorry for not posting much lately.
Trying to keep it together here & that takes all my strength and attention.
Hoping that things here get all sorted out soon.

Take care (((hugs)))

Thank you, dear LR, for taking the time to check in with us. Stay strong.

Good afternoon! Love that your kitchen is clean and clear, Tatoulia!

My thanks to all of you for the hugs and condolences. They mean a lot to me. Beautiful quote, bitsy! One of the positive things about a time like this is that it can bring family members and friends together for mutual support, people who perhaps hadn't been around one another in a long time. Such is the case in this situation. (This is the side of my family that has a number of members with "our" issues, by the way, so I will get to see a lot of "us" at the funeral services this weekend.)

Before I post this, I want to say that I could have sworn I posted this already this morning. Not only did I think I posted it, but I thought I confirmed that the post did "take." I'm confused. Maybe that's just my general state of being at the moment. Anyway . . .

Hugs to all of you.