You look up your average last frost date and count back - I’m a touch early, but I have a greenhouse. When I put things in pots, they usually die.

What do you like to eat that is expensive or hard to get?

I washed some laundry and put it in the dryer.
I touched up my dad’s pot - it’s better now.
I finished cleaning off my hand building table
I emptied and started the dishwasher
I hardboiled some eggs
I started peppers, eggplant, rosemary, ground cherries, and cherry tomatoes.

Bean is going to a Super Bowl party tonight and I will pick him up tomorrow.

Good morning SubC. How do you know when to start planting things? Maybe I can plant something this year. My ex used to plant things. Things I plant seem to die. Maybe I can do some herbs or something in a pot. What's an easy thing to grow in a big pot outside? And maybe in a small pot in a windowsill?

I was kind of sick last night so up from about 3 to 6 running to the bathroom. I still have rumbles in my guts and have to work this morning; I already told them I am working from home today.

I hope to get the living room finished today.

Lila, you are doing well with your tally. And you are moving steadily - that’s important.

My evening fell apart last night. I’m not even sure why. And then I didn’t sleep well. I dreamed I was fighting with Dh all night. I had set an alarm so I would get up at a more consistent time (part of trying to fix my sleep) and it went off in the middle of a dream - Dh had brought his mother to help clean out my house!. I woke up groggy and mad at Dh. I decided to stay in bed until my brain reoriented and I stopped being mad.

I don’t know when Bean is coming today because his mommy wants to watch the Super Bowl. Maybe at a friend’s house. Maybe here with Bean.

I really need to start seeds today. I want to work in the studio some more, and the weather is supposed to be nice and my barn could use some work….

Tomorrow is willow day (I always cut starts on (or near) the 13th and set them in water to root.) How many actually get planted varies, and the deer eat 90% of them, but it’s fun and easy. I’ll get Bean to walk out with me to cut them.

final update of the night. It's getting close to 9pm and I am done.

- folded the rest of the laundry and put it away
- put away Tot's books and toys in the living room
- put away random items in the living room
- had Son put the baby swing and bassinet downstairs since Acorn is too big now
- moved the recliner back to where the baby swing was
- vacuumed a lot of hair and dust bunnies from various areas
- dusted the rest of the tv stand
- got all the stuff off my bed so I can sleep
- washed a plastic basket that looked dirty, dried it and put the dog toys in it
- began to pick up the mess behind the other recliner, where Teen threw all the dvds and broke the shelf. I am done though and will have to finish this tomorrow.

And that's enough for today. I did put a towel in the donate bin. Oh, I was going to try to make it to 100 items (total tally) today and I didn't quite get there. Maybe tomorrow.

It sounds like a very good day retreating, SubC! I am glad to hear it.

I am still struggling and losing steam but not quitting. I managed to vacuum up the dust bunnies in my bedroom. And finished unloading the dishwasher.

I also dusted one shelf on the entertainment center, that's how slow going this is...

And I also took the batteries out of the baby swing, which is the first step in putting it away.

Plugging along...

Lila, you are making progress. Progress is good.

I am having a lovely time at the retreat. The chicks are all settled in their new coop and I dumped a wheelbarrow full of bedding in the garden. I took a first try at throwing a pot my dad wants (not sure I’m pleased enough with the pot to fire it, but I’m quite pleased with myself - it’s one of the largest things I’ve ever thrown in one piece.)

I put three things into the trash instead of trying to clean them for recycling while I was working on the chick pen. This is very hard for me, but I know I’m going to have to accept it. I need to spend my time elsewhere, and I will just keep working at not bringing home things that will become trash. And perhaps eventually I’ll get to a place where I can help other people reduce their trash.

Not by bringing it to my house! One example: people at work keep asking me about eggs. If I had more time and energy, I would have more chickens and be able to sell them eggs, and they could use the same egg carton week after week. And when I was selling eggs at work before, some people brought me their food scraps for my chickens because they couldn’t compost where they lived. (But now I have installed a compost bin at school.)

Tatoulia, are you ok? It is not like you to be gone so long. I am worried.

accountability post:

- cleaned up some leaves and debris in my driveway and put them in the bin
- sat in the sun a bit
- fed dogs and started to unload dishwasher
- folded dry clothes, put wash into dryer
- took 3 boxes out to trash

Now am baking a pizza for lunch. I rarely drink coke but bought one to have with pizza, for energy plus I love coke so rarely have one but don't keep it in the house.

I also made a list so I can stay focused on what's next. This helps, as I feel scattered. I have some momentum going in my bedroom, but the pressing issue is the living room/dining room/kitchen in case someone shows up.

SubC, yep, it is the messes killing us. For sure.
Enjoy your retreat!

CM, it's good to read your update. Ugh, you reminded me I am invited to a Superbowl party tomorrow. I am not going. I was going to, but I just cannot. People are hard, especially when I am feeling low. I am glad your unhappy thing is done, and you have things to focus on.

I am an emotional wreck but decluttering is helping me feel like something is in my control. When I go into my bedroom and start to feel overwhelmed, I tell myself, "start at the bed, and just work your way out." And that helps more than you would think. I just started picking up papers and receipts on the floor nearest my bed, sorting, throwing away. I picked up clothes. There were 3 small boxes full of dog stuff that I was able to sort.

- I emptied some bags of treats into the treat jar
- I threw out one bag of old treats
- I put dog chews and treats into the designated bin
- I put a couple things in the donate bin
- I hung up some clothes in the closet and put a folded pair of pants in a drawer

Now there is some exposed floor and I need to vacuum the dust bunnies. I am taking a break because I am getting a headache. I know my bedroom is important but I need to get my "visiting area" and the places visible from there cleaned up in case someone comes over.

Hey CM!

I'm sorry about your unhappy thing. Sometimes we push emotions off in the moment because they are just too much and they come back at us later. 🙁

I'm really glad your computer is serving you so well. Even though all those files don't have physical mass, they still have a lot of mental weight.

So far my "mini retreat" is working out well. This morning's session was wheel work and I threw nine small pizza stones to use in one of my classes at school. I'm trying to clean up a little more than I use as I go.

I think the first afternoon session will be "setting up a portable coop for chicks" right now I'm having lunch.

Hey all,

I was busy and preoccupied so I haven't posted for awhile. This past week was hard. The unhappy matter from last year had an administrative part that still needed to be dealt with, and I was surprised how hard the sadness/disbelief hit me afresh. But the task is now done, and I am free of having it in my face to think about. Now I can mentally shove it aside as I had been doing, and hopefully move on for good. Ahem.

So. Moving on, getting back on track. Weather here has been okay, chilly sometimes. I haven't done as much physical decluttering. But I'm moving along well with the computer. It has progressed to the point where I don't necessarily need to cart everything to the library to work on it. There are chunks of it that are straightforward enough to do at home, and my roommate has been in and out so I often have solitude, but even when I don't it's not like I'm on the things requiring as much concentration, so I can still work even with her here.

I will still enjoy taking it to the library too, but it's nice to be able to be more flexible. I got more files from my other devices copied over to it as well; those files will need to be sorted through, junk deleted, etc.

I've even done a little with one of my novels - just organizing my notes on characters and plot. That feels good.

I love this computer! It is so easy to just open it up and pick up where I left off. And the speed - downloading, copying, moving files - all are just so effortless.

The thing I still need motivation for is getting back out into the world - going exercising, going to the senior center, etc. It's easy to drift and procrastinate and feel a bit apprehensive about doing those things. Because they involve driving and peopling, I suppose. And executive functioning to make sure I bring along the things I need especially in the case of the gym. However, I don't want to let that scare me off or bog me down. If I need to, I will have you ladies send the Badger.

Tomorrow is Super Bowl and I'm not really into it even though it's the Kansas City Chiefs which is basically Wichita's home team as well. During the afternoon and beyond, the streets are quiet and the stores almost pleasant (after being a zoo in the days preceding). So, I may take advantage of that, if I'm done with the newsletter for the bunny club which is due ASAP.

Bunny club has its event next Sunday, and a meeting the next Sunday, and then the first Sunday in March is when my church has the quilt Bingo. Lent will have begun by then as well. And there'll be another bunny event the end of March. It's getting to feel like the run-up to spring, and I hope it doesn't get overly busy. Spring itself I've needed for an uplift. I mean, I'm hanging in there with my Poco a Poco, and that has helped so much and kept me from sinking into winter depression. I pray we don't get bad snow/ice or extended frigid temps and can just coast right on into spring proper.

I have to go to the grocery store briefly today, not my preference as I try to avoid going before holidays and Super Bowls and such. But only for one or two things, run in, run out, breathe sigh of relief!

Lila, you got an amazing amount of stuff done yesterday and you were dealing with a big emotional load! Of course you are tired!

Dorothy Parker said "it's not the tragedies that kill us, it's the messes."

I'm trying to have sort of a "retreat" today where I ignore my house and just focus on the barn and my studio. Studio first (after chores) because it's cold outside.

I went to bed at a reasonable hour and got up this morning only a bit later than usual. Lately I've been still asleep at this hour on saturdays if I didn't have to go somewhere.

another post for accountability.

- made tacos for dil and grandkids for dinner
- looked around downstairs, gathered some of ex's stuff and put it in a tub already in his room
- put one more item in the donate bin
- folded sheets and blankets from the dryer and put them away

I am trying really hard but I am tired.

oh I see. I have done that SubC. Sitting on the couch surfing because I am too tired to get up and go to bed. Glad you are attempting to fix this habit!

I did get a lot done today and need to give myself credit. This is why I am glad I share here. Otherwise I think, "I got nothing done!" I forget so easily.

I made soup for lunch.
I sorted my tub of papers and got out the things that are most urgent to get done.
I gave away a second box of produce.

I think Tot and Acorn and their mom are coming over and I will make some tacos. Very informal tacos.

I am VERY glad I took tomorrow off, too. I did not fully relax today with people asking me about my stressful things and Teen getting a ride from a friend and coming here which makes me anxious more things could be broken. But hopefully having friend here will prevent that. They are supposed to be going to friend's house for the night. And then going back to the other place.

I hope to get a few more things done after they leave and before my grandkids come.

Oh, I forgot to respond to the sleep thing - people keep trying to help me. Once I lay down in bed, I am asleep in less than ten minutes, I do not wake up unless:
My alarm goes off in the morning
Dh gets up and makes a bunch of noise or turns on a light
The cat knocks something over with a resounding crash
The power comes back on (after not bothering me by going off) and causes the fire alarm to beep
Major thunderstorm.

The tornado siren seems very loud when I am awake but doesn't wake me up.

My problem is I will be really tired, but keep surfing online because I am "too tired" to drag my butt upstairs to bed, or I will be really tired but have to do things (or sometimes need a few minutes to let my brain unwind after doing things - which if I'm not careful turns into "too tired to drag my butt to bed".)

6:30 and already I'm sagging.

Lila, you got a lot done today!

I was at school. Brought more home than I took, but it's mostly borrowed. A few things that are mine that I was using as examples.

Tired now and thinking about dinner.

still working...

- put together a large box of extra produce and legumes and gave them away online
- talked to Teen for an hour, not sure how productive this was

I want to clean my room and the counter/bar, but I need to make a few calls first. Feeling a bit pressed.

Update for accountability:

- folded my laundry
- put blankets and sheets in dryer and towels in washer
- sorted food, threw some stuff out, found 2 things to donate
- baked rolls, ate one with breakfast
- brought up a box of produce and am about to post some for free online, I have too much

I will keep updating and hope someone else comes and posts too!

I sat on the front porch for a long time. No messes there. Small rickety porch but sort of secluded because of the way my house is built.

SubC, are you sleeping better? Are you trying to get a certain number of hours? I have been drinking "mushroom" coffee for a month. It is 7 mushrooms in a powder form. You can drink it alone but I add it to a cup of decaf. It has Lions Mane, Cordyceps, some other ones. It has really helped my sleep but does not make me tired. Just sleep quality is better.

I woke up to the quietest house. Teen still away. Son asleep. Company left to stay with friends because they were so upset by Teen's behavior. Well, I can't say I hate having some time to myself.

So far, and it is not even 9am yet, I:

- took out some trash, bins are by the road
- put my wash into the dryer
- put sheets and blankets, odds and ends of Teen's into the wash, piled up the dirty towels
- spent some time with the cat
- read the Bible
- made coffee
- brought up some ground beef out of the freezer and it's in the sink to thaw (will make taco meat for son)
- brought up frozen roll dough from the freezer and put them in a pan to thaw to bake
- got a frozen little lasagna out and brought it up for my dinner or lunch

Not bad for early morning. I am waiting for the coffee to brew and will grab a cup. My goals for today are to get my bedroom decluttered some, and to clean up my kitchen table, bar/counter that is a landfill, and living room because with all the trauma in my life it is possible someone might drop by to check on me and I don't need to be embarrassed.

What are you all doing today?

Oh Lila, I'm so very sorry.

I'm glad teen has somewhere to go for help. You do whatever best helps you. Hopefully you have a spot where you can regroup without staring at the messes.

I am working on the going to bed early plan.

Stayed after at school to remix clay and haven't really gotten much else done. - ate? Talked to Bean and dd1 on FaceTime.

I got the work thing done. It took all day but I did it. However last night and today there were some Teen rages. Had to call the crisis people to help. Teen is away getting help now. But the results are papers and stuff thrown all over the house, broken glass everywhere, many broken CDs/cases, several broken coffee mugs, a coffee maker and pot, a lamp, a water pitcher, and a tv all destroyed. I am not counting them in my daily tally because it was not by choice.

I am exhausted and cancelled my work for today and the rest of the week. I was supposed to go to a party tonight but cannot. I will get back to work on Monday. I am decompressing and listening to the silence. I will finish cleaning up the glass etc after I sit a bit. I think it might help me feel better to declutter a bit during this time off.

Good morning!

Mylife, what do you want to work on today?

Lila, are you feeling any better? "Most of the day" off tomorrow - hang in there!

Last night I went to bed instead of sitting on the couch scrolling and snacking. I got over eight hours of sleep! Dh couldn't believe I was going to bed so early. I made him come up and pack for his trip so that he wouldn't wake me up doing it later. I'm going to try to get to bed early tonight as well.

It's supposed to be rainy this morning and very windy all day. It's probably too much to hope that the wind will dry things out a bit. My whole yard is mud, and the pasture is really bad.

Hello to CM, Tatoulia, and road. Road, I hope you boy is feeling better!

Lila, I'm sorry you are struggling.

I can't tell you what to do, but, if you can put it off and you would have time and it would be good, I think you should put it off. If you know you will put it off and then rush it later, then just do the thing the best you can and get it over with.

I need sleep.

Right now, I just want to make it through this day and get to bed early. I am riding on caffeine. I almost fell back asleep after I turned my alarm off this morning. That would have been a disaster.

I am having a really hard time. I have a thing I was supposed to be starting at work and I just could not get it together enough to do it, and now I am sort of rushing which doesn't feel good. I could put it off maybe 2 weeks. I am not sure what to do, whether putting it off would be good, or bad. Making me nervous and I wish someone else would just tell me what to do. It's really weighing on me.

Therefore with all the work I have had no more time to work on my room. I feel like I need a vacation already. This is too hard. I will plan to take off most of Friday and all of Saturday and can work on my room then.

How are the rest of you?

hi MyLife! It sounds like you're doing really well. We are all kind of plugging away working on things bit by bit, so you're in good company.

I have way too many bins and containers because I thought it would help me organize. In reality, it lets me hoard. I would like to get to a point of having all my clothing in drawers and closets, MAYBE one bin of things that are off- season, instead of 8+ bins of clothing and piles on the furniture. Also I think shelves and cabinets are better than bins.

I also have this idea. There are beds where the mattress actually lifts up and there is storage underneath. I would love to have this kind of bed so I could store extra blankets, pillows, sheets in there. Maybe you could do something like that.

Hi Mylife!

Welcome!

Wow, 60%! Keep going!

We will encourage you. When Tatoulia gets back, she is good at ideas. She is farther along than the rest of us.

Tell us more about what you are working on!

Hello,
I need encouragement and ideas. I have cleaned 60% and need organization skills! Small home and way too many things! I am unable to do too much at a time because of my health. I have worked the last year and a half and am proud of my progress. I have got to the point of what to do with things I no longer want and how to organize the things I do. Mainly now I need that push to keep going..lol.It gets discouraging at times.

It's never too early to go to sleep.

I stayed up too late for no reason again last night. I really need to stop that!

I am sorry about teen melting down Lila, for both of you.

I am trying to jump start myself with coffee at the moment. I will be up too late again tonight because I have my class.

Early registration for preschool where I work opens today. Bean got waitlisted at DD's first choice and I sent her my link (he's allowed to register early because I am staff. One of my very few perks) but yesterday she said they may not send him at all. They aren't sure when they are going to start trying again for another baby.

Dh is flying to another state on Thursday, going out to dinner with his family to celebrate his mother's 80th birthday, and flying back on Friday. Her birthday was in January, but she was in Greece.

Somehow he can do this, but when his work schedule was clear after 5 yesterday in the morning, he couldn't keep it clear enough to go to the library with Bean and me at 5:30. We waited for him (we usually go at 4:30, but he said he would come if we went after 5). Then Bean was sad, and the library was crowded when we got there, and Bean was afraid to let go of me and do his favorite things, and another little boy accidentally bumped him with a soft toy, and he collapsed in tears.

I am going to try to take some stuff out of the house today.

Moving slow. Gotta get going!

What a day.

I had a good time at work, found someone else to help me get my project done, had good meetings. Came home so I could work on my room and have a nice, happy relaxing evening. Teen then had a huge meltdown, screaming insults at me while I tried to calm them down and offer help. It broke my heart and crushed my spirit and I went in my room and cried for an hour or so. I wanted to just go to sleep but it was too early. Finally I came out of the room and did my taxes. Teen is fine, happy and having fun with the teenaged company. Autism sucks.

I got nothing else done and probably will go in my room and cry some more. So much for working on my room. I have work in the morning. Sorry for such a depressing report.

I do some animal sculpting, but not of specific animals. I do not have the gift to capture an animal's personality or even exact proportions. I like to make dragons. And I do not take commissions except in very rare cases.

I hope you are sleeping in a dust free bed.

How did the project go?

I had a good day with Bean today, but I didn't get lesson plans or planting done.

Also struggling with mood issues and Dh a little. I think it's mostly hormonal though.

I spent a few minutes in the studio this morning and this evening. I'm working on rehydrating some glazes. It's slow, and doesn't seem like much right now, but if I keep doing that - just a few minutes twice a day - empty pint bottles will start dribbling into the recycling. I'm pretty sure there are over 100.

hi Tatoulia! Glad you checked in also, and I echo SubC's thoughts that whatever is going on gets better and you are lifted up in peace and hope.

SubC, your art sounds so healing. I think creating things, and/or helping others create things, is such a beautiful thing. Do you make any sculptures of animals? In my dreams if we ever were able to meet or connect off this board I would love to commission you to make a German Shepherd for me, in honor of my best girl dog who passed and my heart is still broken over her. My son made me a clay German Shepherd when he was in high school art, and I treasure it. I love having art that friends made. I have a painting in my living room that a friend did as a gift, and some little things like painted rocks and such from friends.

I have to work today but the person I need to work with on a project is out sick. I am not sure what to do about that as I need it done by Weds. I will check in the office about it.

SubC, my bed is not bad. It is queen size and I use it as a staging area but I never sleep in it with junk still on it, even if I have to just throw everything on the floor or a chair. When I was cleaning off my night stand, I started to dust the headboard but didn't finish, so when I dust the other nightstand today I will also dust the headboard. Maybe I will vacuum some of the dust bunnies from under the bed as well.

I love your imagery of my room.

Right now, when I step out of the bed, I have maybe a foot of clear-ish floor to walk to the master bathroom. There is stuff strewn all around a rocking chair that is between the bed and the closet. It is like a landfill and I can barely get to the closet at all. So that is the next area... working my way FROM the bed, outward... so, between the bed and the rocking chair, then later, the rocking chair piles itself, then later, between the chair and the closet. The amount of stuff in that small area could fill the back of my SUV. It has all been sorted before and nothing was donate-able but I am looking with new eyes.

So I will at least start picking up on the floor and edging towards the rocking chair today.

I have a few cute containers that I can use to bring my lunch to work or places. I can't put them in the kitchen because other people use them, leave them dirty, microwave/warp them. But they really can't stay on my bedroom floor. Maybe I can find space on a shelf in there.

Good morning!

Coffee clinks.

Tatoulia, I'm glad you checked in. I hope whatever has been keeping you quiet is ok.

CM good job on the exercise and the books!

Lila, I am visualizing a wave of cleanliness and order spreading across your room from the nightstand. How is your bed?

I spent three hours in the studio yesterday - all of it cleaning up and organizing. I'm not sure what I accomplished. I have some small boxes to go to school (some things temporarily, as examples), and a bag of trash, and I put my new molds into a box with the molds I already had that were scattered around the room, but I'm not sure where to put the box.

I think my next goal in there is to try to clear off my slab roller and work table so I can do a project.
I'm going to either plant things or work on school stuff while Bean naps today.

Bean helped me with the laundry a little yesterday. I still have a lot more to do.

Praying for your sweet son, Road.

Oh no, Road! So sorry about your son being in the hospital! I hope he gets well quickly. He sounds like a sweetheart.

SubC, be sure to fit in that rest and recovery at some point. Coming from someone else who has a hard time fitting it in...

CM, slow and steady. You are doing good! I too am picking away at my bedroom. I am tripping over stuff and everything is lost in piles. Let's imagine a clean neat room with plenty of floor visible and clear surfaces, where when we go in there we can find what we are looking for pretty fast.

I did get that nightstand cleared the other day and I was so proud of myself. I slept next to a clean dust free nightstand for the first time in many months (years?) All that is on it is a lamp, clock, 2 books on top of the kindle, with a pencil next to it. It looks bewilderingly nice.

I was motivated by this to clean off the nightstand on the other side of the bed, which is in disuse but piled. Mostly coins I was sorting. I put them all into a little plastic container and put it in a drawer. Took the papers off there and put them with other papers. Threw away a ribbon (which will go on the daily tally. I was saving it forever for who knows what). Now I just need to dust it and it will be nice. The only things on there are a lamp, sunrise clock, and a little jewelry box.

Bit by bit I will make room for myself in there. I started closest to the bed and will work my way out.

Worked today, and leaving for a social visit in 45 minutes.

Prayers for speedy and complete recovery for your son, Road.

Lila, you're accomplishing a lot. I put the 2 cubic feet of books from yesterday on the Daily Tally.

Today I also found the box of writing how-to books that I want to keep - I had found those two at the recycling place that really will be useful, and I knew I had a few others but couldn't find them in the bedroom jungle. Yesterday's trip to the storage unit, besides netting me the other books to donate, also helped me determine I hadn't taken the writing books there. After I came home from church I had a look in the bedroom and unearthed them in a minute.

The bedroom has a long way to go, but I'm picking away at it and beginning to remember what was sort of where ("sort of where" is one of those terms only we clutterbug types understand) when I pretty much gave up mid-pandemic. It is truly akin to an archaeological dig. Layer by layer, and don't break stuff trying to get it out. But really, I feel positive about it. Especially because of the way my brain is working even when I'm not in there, mentally doing a tour and noting things that I'm going to be able to live without more than I thought. All that remains is to remove them physically.

This coming week I'll need to focus in on paperwork - student loan yearly payment plan renewal, and possibly file a tax return, or not. Most years I don't need to but I'll need to check. It's the sort of task I really dislike and must make myself do. And then reward when it's complete.

After that, along with decluttering, computer stuff, etc. I want to resume sewing. Well, that will entail a bit of decluttering first to make a space again to put the machine. But it's not too bad. I am determined that I'm finally going to get the pockets and drawstrings put in the cotton knit shorts my friend gave me, especially because one thing I want to do this spring is go through all my clothes. I'd like to have the shorts finished so then I can lay them out along with other ones and see what's what.

This afternoon I took a little walk up and down the block a few times. Since one of my dumb phobia things is that I don't like to go on foot further than the block where I live, I thought fine, I'll just go several laps. It still counts as exercise, still burns calories. And the endorphins, who knows, maybe they'll help me get braver ultimately.

I like being on the upward spiral at last.

We've had more bunny health things going on - this time my roommate's boy had the stomach issues. He's recovering slowly. We'll keep troubleshooting some preventatives. My two are doing fine and my roommate's girl is A-OK.

Saw some goats on the way to the cemetery on Friday and thought of you, SubC.

Hi to Tatoulia, hope all is well with you.

Oh road, I am so sorry about your son! Itmust be scary to be in the hospital and not really understand all the tests. I hope that he will recover quickly!

Lila, sorry it's a work day for you. I would say staying home and having grands over always beats party!

Today is my first real rest and recover day in along time. I still haven't gone out to do chores! Poor animals. They will be ok though, they got taken care of at 11:00 last night when I got home.

Chores, laundry, studio, plant some things, Dh wants his hair cut, the bunny needs brushing and a cage clean out. The chicks need a cage clean out, lessons to prep. probably have about six hours left until the kids show up with Bean. ok, forget what I said about resting and recovering, I caught up a couple of hours of a large sleep deficit.

Yesterday I spent the days at a really great teacher workshop - it is free and happens every year and I always try to go. Then Dh picked me up and we went downtown to the symphony. Fun, but tiring.

The studio gives us 20% off everything in stock the day of the workshop, so I restocked as much as I could for my class, and also bought some new toys for me. Two pages of decals (consumable) and 8 little molds - I'm not sure if the6 qualify as tools or equipment, but they are 8 items in.

I know I should be cleaning my studio out instead, but I couldn't resist.

Hey all,

It's me Road "Live from a Hospital - Part 3"
My son had to go back to the hospital again. Can't remember where I left off but back on the 22nd we brought him in with stomach or back pain, fever, and GI symptoms. They eventually found pneumonia. Got on meds, gradually got better, went home for four days and took a turn on last Tuesday and we had to come back. This time extreme fatigue, pain and fever returning. Lots of issues diagnosing him with us not being able to understand what he was experiencing and not being able to get good results on scams etc where you have to be able to hold still and follow directions etc. Ugh. Anyway yesterday had to have a chest tube put in to deal with fluid build up and hope they don't find any infection. We are here for a few more days at least. He has been as sweet and cheerful as a poor guy can be under that much distress. It's been tough for everyone.

Just wanted to let you know what was going on. Hugs To everyone and any prayers or healing vibes for this guy appreciated. 💓💓💓

hi friends,

I had a busy day working. I got invited to a party I was planning to attend this evening but I just burned right out. I am not that social. I decided to stay home, and the grandtots came over. That was better than a party.

I keep thinking it is Friday instead of Saturday and forgetting I have to work in the morning. I don't feel like it. I am such a slug sometimes. Sigh.

I gave one item away today so I will add that to the daily tally.

Good evening!

Sitting here with my candles by the fire sipping a glass of wine.

Tatoulia, are you ok? I'm concerned because it was supposed to be very cold in New England.

Lila, the rent makes sense. As long as you have other areas to work on and are still finding more of his stuff - why not let him pay rent. And maybe he will carry some of the things away for you.

Crocs are shoes! So 4 pairs of shoes! And those three gone! Hurray!

And great job on the nightstand. Now guard your space! I hope you will be able to get the bed cleared off.

I have a lot of those random spaces. Sometimes I can make progress if I am going to another room to put away the thing - like a pen, by trying to spot how many other (pens) I can find and grab on the way.

CM, I'm glad your trip went well.

Tomorrow I have an all day teacher workshop and then Dh is picking me up and we have a concert. I will be quite tired! Should probably get to bed early.

Tonight begins the second quarter of the year. Planting and growing, challenges and beginnings and bringing new things into being..

Made it home at 4:25 p.m. Trip going was amazingly anxiety free. Trip returning was a little touch and go at first but I got more settled in. Lots of interactions and significances for my mind to process on the return trip, is probably why it was a bit more challenging. And my cousin turned on the talk radio that was more stimulating than I would've preferred. However, all in all things went well.

Today was payday for me but I'll have to do the banking and stuff tomorrow. And pay the storage unit rent. Will drop off Christmas items and pick up Valentine's, and maybe find some items to pull out. Just to get the ball rolling. But I'm kinda tired so no big ambitions. These little sorties are helpful though even if they're small, because they give me a chance to assess things. And I'm still plenty motivated, no worries. By the time spring weather gets here I believe I will be in a good position to get a lot done, and I'll be doing small amounts between now and then.

Nightstand progress:

Wow what a mess. I can't even tell you. If you took my house and shrank it down to a nightstand size, that is what it was like. A mini-hoard.

First I took everything off. I threw away 3 things and donated 1 thing. I put a coin in the coin jar, a bunch of pens on another surface (ugh), other pens in a pen jar, colored pencils in a pencil bag. I put some hand creams in my bathroom drawer and some in the hall closet for common use. I put the paperwork that has a home into its home.

A couple items went into the drawer. I put a thermometer away in its place.

I tested the CD player and it seems to work, so I got the canned air and cleaned it out, and dusted the outside of it and plugged it in. I looked online earlier for a replacement with no luck so will keep this one.

I dusted the phone and lamp. Put all the books and other items on my bed and used furniture polish to clean the nightstand.

I then pulled it out from the wall and omg the dust and junk behind it! So I pulled it out further, vacuumed behind it, picked up all the random stuff, moved the cords away and pushed it back.

Now I am feeling overwhelmed so took a break. There is a ton of stuff on the floor around it but I will stay focused on my goal of a clear nightstand. There is a lot of stuff on my bed from this nightstand that I need to find a space for or delete from my life.

Today I also ran a couple errands, cooked, and took the box of donations including those 3 pairs of shoes to the charity store and I am SO GLAD those dumb shoes are gone and I cannot bring them back in the house!!!!!

That is interesting about the astronomical calendar and cross quarter. I certainly am on board for a new season with more light. That's what I need, too.

I got the fridge sorted and the going-bad stuff out to the trash. I asked Son to take out all the trashes in the house, plus some of the bagged leaves, so the bins are full to be taken by the truck. I think they do compost the leaves SubC, as long as we empty the bags into the green bin.

I am trying something new with my decluttering efforts. I woke up this morning and tried to "envision" where I want to have clear spaces tonight. I decided on my night stand that is next to my bed.

I wish I could take a photo before and after to share with you all. I know we talked about this like a year ago and some of you have a way to share photos. I did not figure it out but I will take a picture and if I can figure out how to share it I will.

The night stand surface is completely covered. There are papers and coins, lotions and chapsticks, pens and books and all sorts of random items that don't belong there. It is very dusty.

I can see having 2-3 books and a lamp and a few things I actually use in bed on there, or in the drawer.

I do have an alarm clock radio on there and I am thinking about getting rid of it but not sure. You can't get that quality anymore, it is all junk from china. It has a CD player and AM/FM radio, nightlight and alarms. I was using it mainly to listen to the radio at night. I was thinking about getting a new one but it is hard to find anything decent with AM radio. I use my phone for alarms now. I think I will clean it off and think about it. I wanted to find one with USB charger ports to charge my phone and kindle but can't find one reasonably priced with AM radio. I think the CD player is broken. Maybe I will try the CD player and if it is in fact broken, I might go ahead and get rid of it since it is big, and try to find a small AM radio with a charger port.

Thanks for letting me think out loud about this and process it. Feedback welcome!

I also will work on my kitchen counter/bar that looks like a landfill right now.

Jinx!! we posted at the same time SubC!

I am excited too! But also trying to figure out how to get the 375 bucks he is giving me for rent once he leaves. I had an actual renter before that but I really don't want another renter.

I guess I would have to give him notice since he is a renter, technically. I think I will let it go on for another 2-3 months and then ask him to get it all out so I can have the space back. Heck, he has a ton of heavy stuff in my garage that will make lots of space when he takes that. Plus company should be gone within this month and that will bring back TWO small rooms and my family room which is covered in their stuff and boxes. Really I just want ex to take his giant couch out of my family room or give me permission to donate it. But that's pointless until the company is gone.

Oh,

The candles -

Candlemas is a significant date in the Catholic Church. So that is CM's holiday.

The candles actually come from the pagan festival of Brigid who was changes to st. Brigid by the church. Brigid was celebrated on imbolc.

Imbolc means lambs milk and is a festival simply to mark to turn of the seasons. It is currently celebrated in some pagan religions which have fixed the date. Not always to the same day as Candlemas.

I do not follow the pagan calendar, I follow the astronomical one and the actual "cross quarter" - changing of season, is today, with the darkest 1/4 of the year ending locally at approximately 9:27 my time. So I will celebrate that by lighting my candles this evening. (Probably before that, but leave them burning.)

oh - also - I could legally throw out all the ex's stuff now. But he is paying rent on one room to keep some things here until he is more settled. And I need the rent money so that's okay for now. I think it will be all gone within a couple months.

What I could do is sort through his stuff in other parts of the house and put it all in that rented room. I started to do that but got overwhelmed, so as I sort I will go ahead and do that.

Today is my day off, although I may run a couple errands. I have to work tomorrow and Sunday.

It is trash pickup day so I will sort through the fridge and take out anything that is going bad.

Also already today I added 5 more things to my daily tally: 4 bottles of old pills and one sock with a hole in it! Gone forever!

So, all of the property is divided, so do you have to give him notice of abandoned property, or can you just start hauling all his stuff out?

An entire empty room!

I'm so excited for you!

I know you probably want to wait at least until the company is gone, but I would be so excited!

SubC and CM, I don't know anything about the candles and why you are lighting them. Is today or yesterday a significant date?

SubC no, it wasn't anything with the question, it was my brain that forgets! I forgot to answer you. Basically in a legal separation you are still technically married so you cannot re-marry and I personally would not date, either. Some people do date. Anyway the protection of a legal separation is now I am not liable for his debts. The judge ordered which debts and assets belong to each of us. He runs up massive debt so now I don't have to pay it (we live in a community property state so I would have had to). Also if he goes in a nursing home they can't come after me for the payments now (he is much older than me). But our marriage is over, he doesn't love me anymore and I think he had a side chick. And he was unkind to Teen. So I am glad he is gone. He can't come in my house, it was awarded to me, he has to pay child support for Teen. I could have just done a divorce but I was so upset and emotionally not ready for "another" divorce plus I am a rather new christian and don't know all the rules about when it is ok to divorce. But my pastor told me he would support a divorce in my case and I am free to remarry (no thanks tho).

You can ask me anything, I am pretty much an open book. If either ex or I want to be divorced we just have to file one paper to convert it to a divorce and either one of us can do that.

Good morning!

My cross quarter day will start right about the time of my first class today, but I will be home to light candles at the appropriate time this evening.

Planting some seeds today with my students.

Lila, I'm sorry if my question about your xdh and his stuff was out of line or pushy.

I really empathize with you about the jewelry, but unfortunately that means I am no help there. Honestly, it even bothers me to read that you threw away bubble wrap. (But keep posting such things!)

CM, I hope your trip goes well and that you enjoy your time with your cousins, even though it is a sad reason for gathering (a long life to celebrate though!)

I give my bunnies dried papaya to prevent wool block.

Just touching base and I'll do so again when I get home tomorrow afternoon or evening. I think I'm mentally prepared for the travel part. Sometimes it goes pretty well. It'll be my first time as I mentioned since that really stressful time last year when I wasn't feeling up to much in terms of travel.

The funeral itself will be a healing and bonding with family time. Some of the cousins I don't know if I'll see again for a long time because some of them live out of state and in recent times it's only been the funerals of my parents' generation that have brought us together, and he's the last one. We don't have reunions and stuff, and with me not liking travel... But be that as it may, I will be touched in my heart to be part of giving my beloved uncle a fitting sendoff.

I had wanted to go to Mass today before I ended up with the travel plans and so on. But it's okay, I remembered it is a special day anyway. 🕯 A candle for Candelmas. 😊

Must run down my checklist a bit more. We leave at 8:00. That's early in my book anymore! Bunny boy is doing fantastic. I'm so relieved. I think he and girl bunny groom each other and get a little hair ingested, so I'll brush them more to prevent it.

Saw the Daily Tally, and soon I will have some items to add to it. Everyone have a great day. 👍

Thanks SubC for the reminder to get my clothes out of the dryer. I hope they are not too wrinkled.

The necklace. That is a good suggestion that sets me into a panic thinking about it. Why is that? I don't even know. Here is my brain process.

I open the drawer and see all the jewelry and it is overwhelming.
I pick out one thing I have not worn in years.
"but my child gave this to me, I can't get rid of it"
"but I can save this for my granddaughters" (nice things for them to have, and junky things for them to wear as dress-up)
"but this probably cost $50+"
"but I don't remember who gave this to me, maybe it was someone I loved who is dead now and later I will remember they gave it to me and will cry tears of regret"

It is so hard to get rid of ANYTHING really.

I threw out some bubble wrap today even though I COULD USE IT SOMEDAY but I threw it out to count in the daily tally.

It is good progress Lila - 60%!

Imagine if you got rid of 60% of the stuff in your house!

Can you explain to me the difference between your separation and a divorce? If the separation does not end the marriage, will it be ended after a period of time? Or is that a different process? Mostly, I am thinking about the xh's stuff and when you can throw it out!

My sheets are in the dryer. I did chores and took a shower. And I had milk and eggs for dinner (which is supposed to be tomorrow's food - milk and eggs and hot or spicy things like tea, cinnamon, curry.)

Did you ever find that necklace? Could you go to the drawer with a donate bag and a trash bag and just start sorting through by removing things that aren't as important as the necklace?

I don't know how I can be this tired at 8:00