You have a lot of tough stuff going on, Road, and it is emotionally and mentally heavy. Your son will be upset about school but I sense he will at any age, whether it is this year, next year or the year after. I hope he can stay another year.

In a former life I was the advocate (and sister) of a mentally and physically ill person. The fight was tremendous and non-stop. And the guilt. I would feel guilty, my brother would pick up on that and make it worse and then my mother would pile it on too. A different situation, to be sure, and I'm not trying to compare your fight for your son. I want you to know that I understand the overwhelming responsibility it is to be an advocate. I'd take him to the doctor, then fight with to get the meds covered by insurance, then fight this thing and that things and it wouldn't end and yet as women we are made to feel guilty no matter the outcome good or bad. I am so sorry you and your sweet son are going through this. You both deserve better.

Okay getting ready for work. Ttyl.

Good morning people...

Watching "Heal" on prime video right now. It's about people who had serious medical issues and healed against conventional odds. Thumbs Up so far.

Everyone have a great day. ❤️❤️

Hi all,

Some pretty epic stress today. Suffice it to say we are still in limbo With sons placement for next year and trying to decide whether or not to involve an atty. He does have a girlfriend but her parents don't want her to date yet and she can't go to prom because they have too much going on in their life right now. She will be so disappointed when she sees pictures and stuff. Nothing I can do though. Maybe next year she can invite My son. Re my health stuff, talked to a close friend who's an RN, acupuncturist, Chinese med, etc. and she kicked me in the ass and. Helped me reframe everything in a more empowering way. So I am taking all of her advice and took a lot of action yesterday and today. Had some challenges finding a new doctor, but making progress and still sticking to diet. And now our older dog is really ill and has to stay overnight at emergency vet. I think she almost bled to death today. Not sure yet what's wrong. The most stressful thing in all of this is having to tell my son high school is over (if we decide not to fight) and hopefully I am not having to tell him his dog died on top of everything... he was just laying there and with a huge smile on his face he said "feel feel happy. So so glad." He is so sweet.

Hope everyone is doing ok. Subc, keep us posted on your summer job. Cute that bean calls you Grammie. Tatoulia, I like hearing about your coffee table. It gives me hope - it really does.

Lila and Cm, thinking of you too.

Home from work, showered, ready for bed. Cleaners tmr.

I should look around after work for some zero time slots.

Bean works very hard.

Yesterday he got upset because I decided to unload the dishwasher by myself while he was riding around on his truck. He came over and selected some items he could carry. I heard him tell himself "good helper."

He also insisted on filling the wagon with rocks as we walked back through the pasture and unloading them on the rock pile. If the rock was too big for him to pick up he pointed at it and announced firmly "Grammie carry big rock." Bean likes rules and order. He may be the thing that finally tips me out of chaos.

Yay for the coffee table! If you do zero more time today, you can finish the other half! - lol!

I need to put some zeros into my space!

Coconuts!

Road that makes me happy to hear about your son's dance! Does he have a date?

SubC you did a lot today! And bean is getting a lot done, too.

After work, I gathered up the kitty litter and recycling and took out back. Went to mom's with some waters and oj. Changed the litter at her house, then went up grocery store.

I've done half of my coffee table. Took zero time.

Dish washer is set to start in an hour. I need to shower and go to bed.

Sending everyone warm wishes for good health.

I recovered and had a great day with Bean.

We planted peas and overseeded the pasture and fed the goats and did the milking and saw baby bunnies in a nest in the garden (the momma will move them now) and made biscuits. Also, Papa took him for tractor ride.

House is a mess.

I have a job interview on Thursday after school for summer camp. (I only want to work 3 of the 11 weeks, which should be a disqualifier, but it includes the week they are having trouble filling and the woman interviewing me already asked me if I'm free for a planning meeting on Saturday)

Good morning!

Very exciting on the real shoes tatoulia!

I know you drove home "the long way" but I like imagining you successfully completing your fabric mission and driving home like royalty.

Road, I am sorry about your health issues, but glad you are doing well on you diet. Science advances all the time, so do your best and be hopeful.

I tried to work on the garden yesterday, but it was hot and I only got one more bed planted. If Bean and I don't get the peas in today I'll have to plant them alone.

I did run the dishwasher twice and do a load of laundry.

I slept badly last night and woke up with a headache. "Woke up" being questionable as I have been up for 40 minutes and am still fighting sleep. My stomach is not happy about the coffee this morning, which isn't helping.

Hi all,

Oh I loved that story, too, sub c. And Tatoulia, I appreciate your stories about your mom too. My MIL and my dad both have issues with boundaries.

Pretty good weekend here. Sat am kind of slow start. The guys went to breakfast. We used to go every sat. During Covid we stopped. Eventually the guys started going again. I found I was usually too uptight about being in the restaurant so no one had any fun. Haha. Not sure about the numbers around here since no one is testing... One of the H's close friends at work just came down with it but he doesn't think he's been within arms reach of him for awhile. Our planned 2nd boosters got thwarted a few times when wag's was allowing appointments without having vax supply. This is what computers are for people! So we still need to get that done. My son is going to prom next sat and I'm trying not to think of all the hot breathing out on the dance floor... ok now I'm picturing it. Yes we better get that shot tomorrow. Shoes arriving tues, suit can be picked up weds. I'm shopping for snazzy shirt and tie in the meantime... parents are coordinating a bit and all that stuff...

Received my jeans and shorts bins today. These are fabric basket bin things to sit on the shelves yet to be installed for my closet. They look pretty good and are the size I pictured. The closet isn't as deep as I thought though so I won't have room for all and will just return one set of them I guess.

I was thinking today about the garage. I haven't done anything in there at all this spring and prob won't be able to now for a few weeks. But I. Know if I don't start taking this on as my main hobby or job it will just never get done. Must. Focus!

Have been doing well with the diet changes in Regards to kidney issues. But I felt really tired today and my feet are really swollen tonight. Ordered three recommended books today. Still haven't talked to my family about it yet. I've been poking around in a fb group and picking up some good info. Sounded like people's numbers go up and down a bit but generally trend downward over time. Mine have been going down over years, I just wasn't aware of it. As with everything perspective is important. There are people freaking out who are where I was ten years ago. And they don't realize they are lucky they found out when they did because now they can do something about it. And then the other way, there was a woman who was only 28 and also has a daughter with special needs, and she's further down the line than me. She was born with 3 kidneys but two were damaged and now she's down to one. I worry about making it past 75 but she's prob worried about making it to 50.

Carpe diem peeps!

Very easy time at the fabric store. Mom wasn't too talkative and a very kind young person helped her. Very good time. I drove the king way home.

I'm finishing second load of laundry. I want to put on pjs and relax. No I haven't done 5he coffee table. I don't know what is the matter here.

Okay I love this story. All of it. Every minute.

I will bring you as much TP as you like!

So I had dinner with BF last night to celebrate his birthday and I wore real shoes. Like a grown up. Not just flats or all burds. We had a wonderful night. We closed down the restaurant and this AM the waiter thanked me for our kindness. I am friends with the waiter.

I am supposed to take mom out today. She wants sewing things even though I know she cannot sew any longer. She's been talking about the same fabric and skirts for twenty years. But now it's too late. But I'll still take her to the fabric store and let her buy the notions she needs.

We shall see if she is still up for it. She may not be. I haven't had her out in the car in a long time. If it were warmer I'd take her out in the wheelchair to the park but still too cold.

Ok, I have slept for nine hours and am now merely tired and vaguely human.

Tatoulia, I am sorry about the stress from your mom.

We are down to our last roll of toilet paper. Would you please bring some over? We're capable of getting it ourselves, but I'd like to meet you.

A "third place" is a place that is neither work nor home where people gather and spend time in groups. Like church, or the quilting shop, or community theatre, or a bowling alley. My husband's "third place" is his golf league. It is full of people who are part of his life whom I will probably never meet.

My people are not his people. My people are arts people. They have tattoos and green hair and piercings and gauges and hillbilly beards and outlandish, flamboyant clothing. They are warm and wonderful and accepting and supportive, but also wary of outsiders. I love my Dh, but he is on the conservative edge of my world, and he can be very judgemental. When we were dating, he did very badly with my friends. But he was young.

Yesterday went very well. He recognized that he was a guest in a new place, and everyone was incredibly warm to him. I think it helped that when H's nephew saw that Dh had cash, he set himself up next to Dh and proceeded to give him a complete rundown on the space and the people. The cash drew him because he was wearing his security guard uniform and thought he would be useful to have nearby. H is one of the artists, and her nephew Danny is a regular at the studio. He's about thirty, has Down's syndrome, and is always in character of some type. Dh being Dh completely missed the Down's syndrome part (Danny was masked and capped), assumed he was actual security, and having lost Danny's name asked another vendor "what's the security guy's name again?" The confused vendor offered the name of our Jack of all trades who was wearing an orange vest (but not a regular one, a bright orange llbean puffy vest even though it was 85) and directing parking. And Dh said, "no, the inside guy? He's kind of short?"

Anyway, everyone was extremely kind to him and he was impressed (and a little surprised) by how nice they all are. He was also shocked that all of these people know me and come over and talk to me and joke with me and seem happy to see me.

(Ok, I am now realizing that he did better with my friends than I do with his, but his friends are not warm and welcoming and they all think I'm weird.)

It was a light day and we both had enough sales to be worth going but nothing big.

Today he has forgotten everyone's names but he wants to do it again in the fall and they want him back.

You didn't hear about it because I didn't do it.

Yesterday morning I did chores, then I took the boxes of unsold pots from where I left them after the 2019 holiday sale, stuffed them in the car with my booth furniture, a bucket full of tadpoles, a chick in a bucket, a heat lamp, and a stack of materials and half done lesson plans, and drove to school.

I set up the critters in my room, taught all day, sent the tadpoles home with heartgrandson, drove down to the studio, and set up by putting out the 80% of stuff in the boxes that wasn't Christmas focused.

Then I went back to school, got the chick, drove home, did chores, slept, did chores, went to the sale, did ok - more info later, packed up, drove home, took a call from my dd2 about her latest relationship disaster - long journey to everything turned out more or less ok- laid my head down for a minute, and fell asleep.

Apparently my arm was pinned under me and I woke up about half an hour later with a throbbing elbow.

Felt dehydrated, drank water, did chores and am now trying to drink more water so I can sleep.

I would love to buy one of your pots, SubC. We didn't hear too much about your getting ready for the sale. I hope it goes well for you! I'm trying to understand what you are saying about your husband. Is it that this is something you like to do alone? Totally understandable, If that is the case.

My mother called me this AM. I was still in bed. She started with this drawn out story. She didn't even say hello. She started with something about how another awful thing has happened and then sort of "got comfy" in the tale, "well, I was going into the bathroom this AM, just going in in my wheelchair, etc., etc" I said "jump to the important part" and the upshot is she is out of toilet paper. That's it. So I summarized her story by saying, mom, so you are out of toilet paper? And she said yes. And I asked her not to be so dramatic.

It reminds me of many years ago when I was in grad school and under a lot of pressure while working full time and she called me and said, what's the worst thing to happen and I just lost it and told her she couldn't call me until I was finished with my graduate thing which was three weeks away. That was it. I didn't want her to call me. I couldn't do it. I needed that time off to not get calls that start out super dramatic. And at one point she had her secretary call me and tell me to call my mom and that mom was crying and I said, nope. So I've been a little resentful of her today. Thinking about how when I went to France and The Netherlands for a few weeks one summer, she told me I had to give her my info of where I'd be and I refused. And some other trip where I refused to give her my info (maybe Japan?) And she said who will pick out my casket when I die? I wouldn't give her my info solely to not receive made up emergencies. I went to California with a boyfriend many, many, many years ago and she agitated everyone in my life while I was gone, telling them I'd gotten married without inviting her. Funny how her call this AM dragged up this stuff for me. But do you know what? It's on me. ultimately, I did this to me.

Bear in mind I had to go there twice last night for other emergencies.

Bf and I will be celebrating his birthday tonight and I haven't even showered. I am, for the first time since before the pandemic, having a lip wax. I hope the red calms down before dinner.

Spring pottery sale today.

Dh is selling coffee.

I'm a little nervous about having him in my "3rd space".

Wish us luck - especially wish me luck getting rid of inventory!

COCONUTS AND HUGS!

Hi everyone,

CM, we need an executive functioning app.

Sub c, hope you keep improving. Yes, ours is 21 here also but because they have a "transition" program they want him there. None of them had any valid reasons. They just don't want to set a precedent, I'm sure. We aren't sure what we are doing yet. We could fight but it would be costly and stressful and now I feel like they've all betrayed him and that's a bad feeling. So still up in the air for a few more days I guess.

Tatoulia and Lila, I enjoyed reading about your donations. Keep reporting on that because it definitely inspires me.

I gathered up the weighted blanket I bought for my son and am folding it up to return it. He and his dad rejected it.

Will try to get lab work done tomorrow and then identify two more goals to check off in the health department. It's a strategy to not get too overwhelmed. When I feel that way I tend to blow it off because I'm perceiving what has to be done as a mountain... Have to just keep chipping away at it til things seem more manageable.

Lunch with bff. I requested we hit a family rest. Instead of usual Thai because I still Haven't worked out how to find something safe to eat in a Thai rest. Which is oh so depressing to me. I know they make stuff to order so maybe I can work it out. Still, the fish sauce and egg rolls, (and and and...) it's all out I think. Silver lining... I am certainly losing weight which I need to do in all of the scenarios so that's good.

Alright everyone, I leave you with a cheer::: gimme a C! Gimme an O! Gimme another C! Gimme an "onuts!" What's that spell?! COCONUTS! (& hugs)

Hi

Been trying all week to get to my computer to make a really long post. But this week has been pretty fragmented with all the backlog from the last few months. Also the evil tree pollen made my roommate really sick over Easter weekend. I went to Target to fetch her an additional HEPA filter unit - and while there, got another migraine, from the fluorescent lights I guess. Luckily and thankfully not one with a bad headache, just visual weirdness which passed.

Too much to do, too little time and crappy executive functioning due to tiredness. In other words, the usual. Better energy today though. Weather still uncooperative. Hoping next week will see improvement.

I'll still get a longer post written; I just don't know when.

Feeling a little better but still feeling crummy.

Not taking medicine anymore.

Road, I'm sorry your son has to graduate. Here you can stay in high school until your are 21 if you have special needs or were held back.

Cheering for progress and hoping for medical stuff.

Hugs and coconuts!

Lila, great work! What a good thing to get rid of those syrup bottles! Today in the bags to goodwill there were three things I didn't want to get rid of. Wasn't ready. Now they are gone and I'll never think of them again.

Sending you support.

Thank you for the support. I hope to get back to some kind of regular, productive posting next week.

Medical stuff all day. Feeling hopeful with a good team. Waiting for decisions to be made. In the meantime I am working all weekend going to another site. It will be very very long days and nights but probably fun. Will be a nice distraction.

Yesterday I emptied and got rid of 4 old bottles of flavored coffee syrups. They were dusty, big, taking up space and expired. Now they are gone and there are dust-free rings on the counter where they were. Will wipe off the counter next week... too much stuff on it to deal with now.

I sorted some papers today.

Road, I am sorry about the stressful meeting at your son's school. I am sorry that they won't keep him another year. Sounds like he enjoys it and it provides a nice place for him during the school year. I honestly cannot imagine what it is like living with a difficult spouse and I'm sorry for that too. Praying for your health. You have a lot going on and be sure to remember we are here for you.

My day shaped up okay. I woke up early (for me) at 8:30 and did two loads of laundry. I washed one load with white bathrobe and my towels (also white) then a load of jeans (I hang to dry). Then I saw BF, went to goodwill with two more bags, went inside goodwill and left without buying a thing, then drove to consignment to pick up my jewelry that didn't sell. I didn't buy anything there, either. I stopped at another place on way home and once again did not purchase. Then I saw BF, then came home and napped. I picked up my comforter from the laundry; it is all wrapped up and ready to spend the summer in the closet. I'm now doing a load of laundry which consists of darks that go in the dryer. I know I do a lot of small loads. It makes me happy and it comes to me naturally.

My brother was having an issue today and I think I solved that. All around an ok day. I'm glad I had it off.

I'm now chipping away at the coffee table. It's nearly 10 so I can't do much more shredding. I think the downstairs neighbors are away but just in case. Their bedrooms are underneath my living area so I don't want the shredder to bother them. That's the news from here!

Hi all, Tatoulia, hows your day off going?

SubC, feeling any better?

Lila, CM, any updates?

We had our school meeting today. Did not go well so not sure what we will do next. Had to involve the H since I am crying so easily right now but he comes off as too combative in meetings so it's a mixed bag (but I couldn't have said much without blubbing. So aggravating.) we were just asking to stay another year at the high school for a number of good reasons and as we figured they won't budge. Of course they put this meeting off for 3 months basically just to say no. We will talk about it when he gets home and im going to ask some friends for their advice also. I'm not sending off any emails today that's for sure.

I have scheduled the u/s for my kidneys. Unfortunately I delayed scheduling wrapping my head around the whole thing and they're backed up so I won't be able to get that done for a few weeks. Might do the lab work tomorrow. I was really feeling terrible physically a few days ago and that was concerning because if I'm following this kidney disease diet properly I should feel same or better, not worse, but who knows. I do feel pretty good today. It seems very serious and daunting but I won't really know just how much trouble I'm in (or not) until I get a few more tests I think and talk to a different medical person.

So much to juggle right now with end of the school year, extracurricular activities and possibly graduation.

I'm sorry you are sick, SubC! Glad that your mom called at the right moment!

I'm doing a load of laundry and I'm mapping out my day off. I'll keep everyone posted.

I was whining. I typed "I want my mom." My mom instant messaged me at that moment. I left to reply, and when I came back my whine was gone.

Tired, overwhelmed. Making no progress. Still sick. Carry on..

I'm taking tmr off. Was supposed to do something with BF Thursday and Friday. Now moved to next week. Still takingtmr off.

Cleaners were here today. Glad to have clean sheets.

Poor SubC. I'm so sorry. I take a lot of prescription meds for depression and thyroid, (anyone reading this beyond our core group, please be kind, I know that meds aren't for everyone), but I too have problems with OTC cold, sinus, allergy meds. Do what is right for you.

Thank you for the kind words. It is just the one surface in my home that is a problem. Maybe tonight.

I am running massively late for work. I don't want to go in today.

Tatoulua, I do that too. Honestly, I think it's tiredness. You reach a point where you just don't have the energy.

Also, I would love it if there was one surface in my home that was driving me nuts. However, we can send the badger over to have a look at it.

I am trying to decide if I can go to school today. I feel a little better, and I haven't taken the decongestant yet, but that is because my body seems to be reacting badly to the medication. I don't usually take drugs, and to avoid tmi, I'll just say my digestive system apparently wants them out quickly. That doesn't work in a classroom that doesn't even have a bathroom on the same floor.

Off to see if I can get through chores..

I really wasted tonight. Nothing to show for it. I didn't do a thing.

I've showered and now I'm running the dishwasher. Back in office again tmr. Today there were only three people on my side of the floor. Wednesdays, everyone is required to come in. I've asked two of my employees not to come in. One due to her roommate having Covid and the other one had a covid exposure last week but I still told her to stay home if she wants.

I don't know why I insist on wasting my time.