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Hoarding Help Message Boards : The Daily Chat : What are you doing today (part 15)
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What are you doing today (part 15)

Posted: 23 July 2021 - 11:07 AM
Hey all,

SubC, hope your appt went well...

Inch by inch. Yep - and I was intrigued by Tatoulia's "guard your space" imagery. Makes you think about in terms of not losing ground... have never considered things this way...

And I also appreciate the wisdom SubC laid out re: all the failed attempts and not having given him a foundation of trust. I think if I can get through this room and even start making progress on the garage he will start to feel a little hopeful but it's not reasonable to expect him to before that. Then again we do have a long history of him having a short and unpredictable fuse which can be extremely damaging and demotivating, but anyway, I have to get this done no matter how he behaves. I am accountable for my behavior and he is for his.

Re labeling bins, funny what you said about that. In order to be really useful they would need to say things like "am almost ready to let go of just need to take photos of these" or "these are very important and valuable you need to pack these better and store them in a safe place ..." do they make post it's that big? Lol -
Posted: 23 July 2021 - 09:06 AM
Hi Sara!

You can type it somewhere else and cut and paste I think. I know people have done that in the past.

Leaving for my eye appt really soon. Cross your fingers for me!
Posted: 23 July 2021 - 08:38 AM
Hi all, my stupid reply got eaten again... I'm rusty at this msg board Medium. Glad to hear people's updates and some wisdom. You guys are a great group. Be back a bit later,
Posted: 22 July 2021 - 05:10 AM
Good morning,

Yay Sara!

Do you know "the garden song?" There is a line that goes "inch by inch, row by row, gonna make this garden grow."

Just keep inching along!

I'm sorry you are fighting with your Dh. I don't know what your underlying relationship is like, but for me, it helped me to realize that Dh had been living with my mess and my failed attempts to fix it for years, and that I had given him no reason to believe I would ever succeed. It took a lot of progress before he could start to see that this time might be different. And he still gets worried/upset when I backslide, and I still move much more slowly than he would like. But he has learned (mostly) not to say or do the things that make it worse.

Are you labeling your bins? I know I did not feel safe labeling my bins at first because I knew Dh would judge the contents, but now that I can, it is very helpful.


I'm happy to hear that things continue to go well with your mom. It's good that she is so close. I worry that one day my mom will need me and she will refuse to move.

❤️Grandson is super happy about the wedding. ❤️daughter told me they were having a disagreement over something silly - like which sauce was best - and her fiancĂ© said I just can't believe you would think that! All over dramatic. And ❤️daughter asked "are you still sure you want to marry me?" And ❤️grandson yelled "yes! yes you do! Don't SAY that!"

I pick up Bean lunch time and keep him until late because they are getting him after dog training class (his dog is naughty.)

This morning I am making pickles - I'm trying a new sweet variety.
Posted: 21 July 2021 - 11:12 PM
Congratulations SubC! It sounds like your daughter has a good head on her shoulders! Wishing her much happiness!

Sara, I am sorry that your husband is not more supportive. I'm so sorry. Keep going in the right direction and guard those 144 sq inches! Guard them and keep chipping away.

I saw mom tonight and she seemed to be doing pretty well. I need to be going every day. I brought her laundry and a few more dishes I'd watched.

Long day at work. But my cleaners came and cleaned up while I was in meetings. Pretty nice. I need to decide at what point I'll go to every two weeks. Every week is so great but very expensive.

Go to bed in my very clean sheets!
Posted: 21 July 2021 - 10:19 PM
Hi all, ah poop, I just lost my response cause my iPad died. Now maybe I will be more concise. That reminds me of the scene in the office where Pam would pretend to put the call through to Michael first so he could get out all the dumb things he would say first and then be more serious and focused when she actually put the call through.

You guys can call me Sara or road or whatever. Sara is my real name but my handle is not anything anyone would know. I remember doing a public board like this a few years ago - probably weight watchers - and I used a handle That I used for other things online - and then one day I got paranoid what if someone searched that handle and up popped all my posts. Yee gads.

CM, I am intrigued by the whole storage space and the tracking of cubic space in there. That seems like it would really help to make incremental progress more tangible. I think I will try that for the garage. Speaking of which, I went in the garage for the first time since the inherited hoard from my parents house has been added and since the moved hoard from my room has been added and F me excuse my French but it was packed. And that's disheartening...

/marital rant sorry/// and then my H (after being pretty darn pleasant for a couple days) fell off the Niceness wagon again and hurled a couple "you have xyz time frame... and then I'm gonna start dumpin!" threats at me. I said "you asked me how you can help me and the one thing I asked you was to not be mean." And then instead of letting that land, he just started making comments about how he has the right to be upset and kind of testosteroned his way around the house mumbling. I'm kind of making light of it but that's really a good description of what happened. I just get crushed by that stuff. I guess this time especially because I just confided in him the other day about some insights I gained from the exercises in the "buried treasures" book, and I knew it was a gamble because sadly, when I am vulnerable like that - well let's just say this therapist I used to see discouraged me from sharing stuff like that with him because he's not trust worthy in that way. Sad to say but it's true. He also said "you've had half the summer!" As if A) We ever agreed to a Scope or a timeline B) that we haven't just endured one of the most eventful, stressful 6 week periods in our 30 year relationship... *le sigh *deep breaths... Yes, perhaps someone who does not have a hoarding problem could clear out this room and reorganize it quickly. But that is part of why I have a hoarding problem - because I can't do that. If I could do that I wouldn't have a hoarding problem. So... no more sharing with the H unless he earns my trust, and even though I feel a bit flattened right now, I am determined to continue making progress because the alternative is not an option. I appreciate you guys being here because after that happened the first thing I wanted to do was check in here and get my head back on straight again. So thank you.

Progress update: "overthinking" exercise... I decided my issues with being "overly creative" were more of an issue when I was actively acquiring. I still have those tendencies but am mostly past that I guess. The other two things were "cumbersome process" and "overcategorizing" which are more tied to getting rid of things and I still have all of those issues to contend with.

Square inches and bare floors... happy to report I reached my goal of 144 sq in cleared (and then some). It's getting easier but this phase of the job is mostly trash and things that have become trash. What I have left is about 10-15 sq feet of paper covered floor - prob no more than 8" high. Then everything else on the floor are books, bags, bins, things that have fallen off tables, etc. once this 10-15 is done, all the gross and super time consuming depressing stuff will be done in this room so that will be something to celebrate. Then it will feel more like a room that just needs cleaning and reorganizing instead of something that I worry my son will take pictures of and text to all my friends and family.

Thanks again for letting me share and vent here. I will be back later tonight or tomorrow after I read through again. Sending out good vibes to everyone.

xo 😘
Posted: 21 July 2021 - 08:19 PM
Hi everyone, just checking in. I'm reading the last few days and will chime in later...
Posted: 21 July 2021 - 04:07 PM

She just came out to tell me in person. I am super happy for her, but a little nervous because she hasn't known her fiancé that long. OTOH, they subjected each other to an extensive questionnaire before going on a first date and have written plans for finances and have discussed issues like home chores and child rearing at length. Also, they are doing premarital counseling. She mostly wanted to tell me in person so she could reassure me.

In other news, I canned 12 pints of dill pickles, weeded 1/3 of the garden, dried more kale, and Bean's birthday present arrived. Kitchen is a mess.
Posted: 21 July 2021 - 07:41 AM
Two cats!

I still have so many things "stored" on floors.

The garden is coming in like crazy, so I am in maintenance mode at the moment - trying to use up or put up the same amount that comes in every day. (And failing, but the chickens are eating well and cheaply.)

Speaking of, I gave 4 more jars of ten year old jam to give them. Today I will put t he jars on the counter (not in the cleared space) and take the box downstairs, fill it with empty jars, and put it away in the closet - so, one thing off the floor.

I put beans in the dehydrator overnight and should be able to take them out in less than an hour. Yummy crunchy beans - so much better for me than chips, or even nuts. Although Dh has been worrying about my protein intake lately.

The new bunny is doing well. She is still a secret. I am rethinking her name.

I have been sleeping more lately, which I think is a good thing, but it makes it hard to get things done. My energy levels are still lower than I would like, my weight is still up, and my knees crackle audibly on stairs. I refuse to accept that this is just age and irreversible, but i struggle to make good choices. Blasted executive function....
Posted: 20 July 2021 - 01:34 PM
SubC you made me chuckle. Right now I have spaces for two cats in my library closet. Also, I never feel left out. I'm probably the biggest offender! I read the posts, feel what the poster is feeling, then all of a sudden, I start to write and I ca only recall a small bit. Tillie had a really good system for touching base with all of us!

I'm doing some laundry right now so I'm feeling pretty good. I have to go downtown to feed my friend's cat. I also need to go see my mom. I didn't see or speak with her yesterday. I am trying to moderate what I do and when.
Posted: 20 July 2021 - 12:37 PM
Oh dear! Hello Tatoulia!

I came back to post to you and the site wouldn't load and then you came by. Please don't think you were least important, I was just working my way up.

Right now I'm going to confess because I keep forgetting - I bought a new t-shirt at the fair yesterday. I like color, fabric, and design, and it supports 4h.

I'm sorry the pkace moved all your "toss" stuff, but goid to hear that your mom is cooperating. It sounds like you are making goid progress with her new place.

More closet work?! Will you be making space for another cat?

Lol-maybe I will start measuring what I have gotten rid of in cat units.

I picked the garden this morning and loaded the dehydrator with more kale. That should be ready to take out, as is my wash. I also cleared off some space on the floor for the basement guy to walk. He is coming to examine the places that are still leaking and give us an estimate.

Ok, back to work!
Posted: 20 July 2021 - 09:06 AM
Love these posts! Hoping Lila and Sara are doing well!

Cm sentimentality is something I've been able to manage over the years, and that has been enormously helpful to me. My family moved every year when I was growing up, so it was packing and unpacking and repacking and having things break. And so then I start to hang on to things as an adult, because anything from my childhood seems so precious. I have been fortunate that through this process here, I've been able to give up things. Mentally a switch starts to flip and I have to decide that it's time for someone else to love whatever that thing may be. I don't take pictures because I'm not sure that will be helpful to me in the long run. It feels hard but then I remember Tillie talking about peeling the layers of the onion and I have to agree. It works for me.

My friend is coming over in August to do another pass at the closets with me, which will be very useful.

I have some artwork to get rid of, not sure if goodwill or somewhere else is the right place. I don't think I'll bother trying to sell it. I'm not sure.

SubC I love the description of your very good day with Bean! Your life is lovely. And how sweet that he is curious and gentle with the animals?a fantastic combination at his age!

That is very good advice about the life span of the animals. Thinking through the whole process makes enormous sense.

I have a long to do list. Time to get cracking!
Posted: 20 July 2021 - 07:53 AM
Part two - I did my chores and started a wash. Slow start today.

CM, things with faces are hard. I think the cases sound like a good idea, but I'm going to ask you before you get them to think through the whole plan. Are they wirth the cost? Where are the folks now? Follow the whole process through in your head and identify exactly what you will get rid of once the cases are in use. Do you have anything already that you could use even for a couple of weeks to see if the moving/sorting/rearranging really helps? I know your money is always committed in many places.

As long as we don't start hoarding rabbits, we are ok. I have three cages. I have been thinking about breeding, but I would need to set up space and housing options for up to six more rabbits in case I got a large litter that didn't sell, and I'm not sure I'm up for that. I know you probably have feelings about breeding, but these rabbits are production animals with a niche market, not just cute pet bunnies (they make high maintenance pet's) they can also be a noticeable source of income at $25-$100 each. Depending on quality.

One of the farmers I follow talks about getting livestock and says that before you even start looking at stock, you need to think through the entire lifespan of the animal - what will you do with the body? How will you handle vet care and end of life? how will you use/store/market production? will you breed? What is the plan for offspring? what housing and supplies do you need? How much time will this take and how will you fit it into your schedule?

Then when all that is ready you can start looking at animals. I didn't even think that hard about my kids.

I'd like to point out that your family doesn't have to be your relatives. You can "adopt" your own family at any point in your life. I know this because I have extra kids I didn't raise and we have a friend who calls Dh his brother and our kids his nieces and nephew. We also have relatives I wouldn't stand next to in line for a bus.

Things to do - back to talk to Tatoulia later.
Posted: 20 July 2021 - 05:56 AM
Good morning!

How lovely to see all these posts!

I hope Lila is feeling better.

Sara, I think square inches is a fine idea! That is definitely my counter speed. The important thing is to keep moving in the right direction. It sounds like your son might have four more years of school, so I suggest no more supply shopping! If you need something, you have to shop the bins. He sounds like he is big enough and strong enough to help you move them around so you can search.

How did your laundry go?

I'm sorry about your garden, but I think you made the right choice. My latest struggle is struggling with adding things that use time.

Bean loved the fair yesterday. I had a fantastic time! He got so excited about the ducks. And he thinks I am amazing because I made the turkey gobble for him. Watching him process a cow... at first he said "vroom" Which is his vehicle noise. Then the girl who is showing the cow turned it's head and let him touch the ears and the nose and cheeks and he said "dit!" Which means "goat". The 4h kids loved him. They all commented on how he was not afraid at all, but that he was gentle and respectful. One 9 y.o. Who is doing her first show spent a ton of time telling us about her goats and letting him feel a show clip vs. the goat's natural coat. She promised him that when he comes to show she will help him with everything (she'll be 17). He managed to stay awake until 12:30 ( he usually naps at 2). I had wanted to stay all day and watch the goat shows in the afternoon, but there isn't a good place to park his stroller at the show ring, it was getting hotter, and I decided to quit while we were winning and drive home while he slept. He transferred into the crib without waking up and slept another hour!

Anyway, I thought if this now because my friend who is dairy goat superintendent invited me to come back on Wednesday for the fun show and promised me a job. Normally I would say yes instantly, but I told her I don't think I can.

I still haven't made pickles. I have peaches to can. My garden needs to be weeded and I have Bean on Thursday and a stressful medical procedure on Friday. I may not go back to fair at all. I love the fair, but I am struggling to make decisions about how to use my life. Last year there was no fair at all. I was sad, but it was ok. This might be enough for this year. One thing I am sure of is Bean.

If you read this before I post any more, I'll be back.
Posted: 19 July 2021 - 11:03 PM
LOL, Tatoulia, I hated being an only child and I still do! In my situation it was very isolating and weird. 😕 I devoured storybooks about siblings and adoption (I was not adopted, but I kept hoping against hope that my parents would adopt a sibling for me). And having never married nor been a mom, I face old age someday very alone indeed. 😰

That's a huge reason, among several, that I wish I could overcome the agoraphobia; I could drive to see my cousins. Only one of them lives here in my town. At least she and her husband are now retired so we can get together more often.

Her sons are pushing 40 and the younger one is finally going to be a dad in August. The other has a live in girlfriend who has a daughter so I guess he's sort of a stepdad? There is just not a close tie for me with them; they're busy and I'm just the weird boring cousin who is poor and who doesn't like to travel and go to sporting events and concerts as they do. Used to see them occasionally at holidays when my aunt, their grandmother, was still around.

But anyway, being an only. My cross to bear. I accept it as best I can. It's a topic I read about a lot and am gathering research material and my own musings about for some sort of writing project, book or blog, I haven't decided. I'm obsessed. That's okay, it's my coping mechanism. 😉

I totally think being an only has fed into my hoarding tendencies. Not that it does for everyone; plenty of onlies aren't hoarders. But I do tend to trust things more than I do people. And I sentimentalize things - which you all know I'm training myself to overcome. Although the dolls, I admit, are hard not to do that with.

And of course the bunnies - but bunnies are not just things, so hopefully that's different 😄🐇
Posted: 19 July 2021 - 08:30 PM
So mom was terrific on Saturday, letting me get rid of stuff. I was really happy about that. She even let me get rid of stuff that was previously a solid no. Like her printer, which she Asher had a computer in more than five years. That sort of thing. Shocked that she's agreed to the bread maker. I should back up: BF and I had left a lot of stuff in her old apt, telling everyone that it was all trash. Well they brought it up anyway so there I was, dealing with the bread maker and the toaster oven and the spice rack. But she let me get rid of those things. Actually I can't find the bread maker but when I do, it's gone.

I brought joke her tea towels and her silverware and washed those things here. I also bought her new bathroom towels and I have washed them but not brought them over. I got her a new silverware tray. That sort of thing. I've also ordered her a new comforter. I saw it at Macy's but they didn't have the twin size so I got it on line. It will brighten your her place. And I can get rid of her ok'd comforter and maybe one of the duvet covers. So she's been very, very good. Her new apartment will get better if I can spend some time there on Saturday. On Sunday I just wanted to spend time with a friend out in the leafy suburbs.

So that's my progress. My own home feels like a disaster and I'm so happy to hear of your progress, everyone!
Posted: 19 July 2021 - 06:51 PM
Cm I didn't know you were an only child. My absolute dream.

Loved reading all your posts!

I'm at my friend's apt, feeding her cat. It's weird being back in the building where I lived for six years before buying my own place. I want to feel something but her place is the reverse of my old place so I'm not feeling what I'd hope to feel. Now I'm waiting for BF because he wants to meet up downtown.

Saturday I got a lot done at mom's. She was very compliant and very nice. Maybe I've told you this? I went to a friend's house yesterday and she made homemade pizza and then baked some cookies. I felt very pampered. I only saw mom for a few minutes last night. I went to bed around 8 PM. And it was great.
Trying to decide if I'll go into office tmr.
Posted: 19 July 2021 - 01:37 PM
Square inches for the win!

I mark progress in my storage unit by cubic feet of stuff removed. The unit is 24x10. I hadn't planned on one that big but that's what was available at the place near my home - and truth be told, I haven't had a lot of difficulty filling it horizontally and sometimes vertically. Things are in disarray from hasty moves and rearrangements but some of that was for pulling out donations.

So... 24x10 and the ceiling is about 8 ft. I think, which makes 1,920 cubic feet give or take. Just checked it on the calculator. I really try not to stack up clear to the ceiling, so I'm gonna guesstimate that perhaps half of that is really filled with stuff. Maybe even less. Right now I have stacks to step over but they aren't that high, there are shelves/stacks around the 3 sides. But not shelves or tall stacks in the middle.

Still, there is much to do, many cubic feet to go. I'm game, especially this fall when it'll be cooler but sometimes we haven't had the blazing hot weather I'd been afraid we'd get. There have been times I went by to just grab something out and I was surprised it wasn't hotter. Of course if I'd stayed in there working, I'd have gotten hot and sweaty.

I'm going to order some flat cases, the 12x12" scrapbooking paper ones, for my Barbie collection. Just a few dolls will go in each. Then the sweater box size boxes will go for fabric (and I'm sewing/quilt piecing again so those will dwindle). Bigger boxes than that, as much as possible, are to be eliminated in favor of smaller, lighter, easier to move when that day comes.

For those of you new to this board who don't know my situation, the storage unit is a necessary evil because I went from my parents' 3br w/basement house to small apartment living and now to a roommate situation, with downsizing being an ongoing process. I'm an only child with family pictures and memorabilia, and some of the items I'll need to set up housekeeping that I don't want to get rid of like the nice pots and pans my mom bought me. I'm on disability and at this time can't afford my own place. Trying to figure out what to do to change that on one income with no spouse or kids.

Everyone here has been so understanding, supportive, and encouraging. Sharing the struggles and the victories along the way.
Posted: 19 July 2021 - 07:36 AM
Hi everyone,

Bean sounds like a lovely little being. 💕

Love the description of your scullery and working your way over.

I think I'm already learning from this group that this situation is a lot like all the other tough stuff in life that the real necessary work of it is being willing/able to keep chipping away at things even if you can't see a difference Right away... gee that's so unappealing. Lol. Maybe I should start reporting visible bare flooring in square inches rather than sq ft!

My son is 17 and has Down syndrome. He's a big ole smiley dude who has an extra large, extra charming personality. He's got some behavior issues that are challenging. The one most relevant to this discussion is we struggled for years with his compulsion to move objects from one place to another in the house. E.g., kitchen knives to bathroom drawers, antique books being set as coasters under lamps and drinks, etc. and daily dumping of things he doesn't want in His room into my room. At a rate of about 7 a day, if I don't deal with it for a few days or a week, it adds up to a project. I think if I photographed the position of all the books in the house one week and compared that to a month later, most of them would have been moved. Actually it is getting Slightly better.

To answer your ? About placement, he's been in a self contained class his whole school career. The program he's in focuses heavily on practical skills but I think they did it at the expense of basic academics. He moves at a slower pace than some of his buddies with autism or Down syndrome and so he gets left behind academically even with his special needs peer group. So I've done a lot of mommy school at home Over the years which got broadly expanded During the pandemic of course,.. I've had some good successes with him Which I'm proud of. I guess that's another example of chipping away at it. Nothing comes fast or easy for this guy - unless you need someone to host a dance party!

In terms of the school supplies, they start to pile up on the table because I accumulate more volume than the space can hold and eventually the shit hits the fan (dh) and it all gets binned up and moved to the garage or the basement never to be dealt with again, and gradually the stuff gets replaced,,,, rinse and repeat.

Enjoying hearing about the garden. Mine got discontinued after April so even though I started seeds for everything, the only stuff still going is what got started before things started unraveling... carrots, beets, onions,,,, peas are done already. Last year I had the world's largest and most prolific crops of lemon cucumbers ever known to mankind. Usually I have about 15-20 tomato plants. This year I have one and a volunteer that is so heavily shaded by weeds it hasn't produced a bloom yet. But I made the right decision letting it go. Too much going on right now, Next year!

Goal for this am is dealing with forgotten laundry from 3 or 4 days ago and doing a load of clothes,,, and maybe 144 sq inches of floor space...
Posted: 19 July 2021 - 05:26 AM
Good morning again!

Hello Sara, thank you for all the posts! It's great to have people who want to share!

You didn't say if you minded the Sara or if you would prefer Road1828. I warn you - as you can see we will shorten that with a nickname.

I was sorry to hear about your son. That must have been very scary!

Some people use Instagram to share photos and just tell us where they are so we can go look. (I don't share photos)

I hope your parents settle in quickly. You really have your hands full right now!

It is nice to have a fellow gardener. We had beets and cucumbers from the garden as part of dinner last night. Bean (my grandson) was a fan.

I had him for ten hours yesterday, and today I am keeping him all day and taking him to the county fair. He is getting more and more active and heavy and teaching me that I am old. I really need to up my maintenance game on this body.

A lot of us struggle with dishes and laundry. You will see that posted here quite a bit.

I understand the appeal of a giant place to sort. I think we all dream of it. I have learned to scale that back and make micro progress. It is slower, but it pays dividends - like my scullery counter.

Background: We built an open floor plan addition to our house and put the kitchen on one wall - the original house was a double wide prefab with a half second story and an unfinished basement that flooded constantly. It was a gut renovation and a long story, summarized by my Dd who said "my parents bought a tear-down and then moved in." Anyway, the dishwasher is still in the old kitchen, along with a sink, and I call it my "scullery"

So, the counter us buried in a drift, but I chose a category that had sone where to go (canning lid rings) pushed the pile over/stacked it taller, and set out a towel. I started churning and washing the rings as I found them and laying them out on a small towel to dry completely. While I was at it I also removed some trash and recycling. Now the rings are put away, but I left the towel as a reminder not to put anything there. The pile is smaller and I can sort out the next thing. As I go, the space will get bigger and eventually I will have my whole counter back to sort things on. Small sections and short sessions will add up. CM has made great progress with her storage unit that way.

CM, I am glad your bunny is better and I hope the fleas are gone soon!

Hello to Lila and Tatoulua, and anyone else who makes it back in time to see this!
Posted: 18 July 2021 - 11:06 PM
Hope you will all tolerate my verbosity while I get my bearings,

Little accomplishments for the day: took a bag of garbage from my room down stairs, brought a load of laundry down, Cleared a little more floor space, worked on cleaning the kitchen, picked some carrots, onions and beets from the garden for dinner, Made dinner, unloaded the dishwasher and rinsed the next load (challenge for me)...
Posted: 18 July 2021 - 10:54 PM
Sometimes the extra things to do around here, the rearranging around the construction and stuff like that, have made roommate and me snarly. But we're doing better now. She has had aches and pains and the fleas have bitten her more because she has the dog, and she's allergic to the bites.

Me, I'm okay physically; the knee is doing better because the bunny is doing better and I don't have to hand feed her which involved crawling around in the bunny playpen to fetch her. She would eat one bite and run off, rinse and repeat. My knee did not appreciate the bending and twisting.

We have new flea traps, and today sprayed insect growth regulator around (much moving of stuff to prepare to do that).

Living the dream!
Posted: 18 July 2021 - 10:52 PM
CM, I could relate about the construction noises affecting your nerves. Our house was a fixer upper 20 years ago when we bought it. It still is, really, but one more to our liking I guess. My tolerance for contractors in the house has plummeted.

Hey, a fellow quilter. That's awesome. Smart and nice to do it for church. Sounds like you've struck a good balance. I probably have the classic hoarder irony of gathering gathering gathering supplies to the point where the sheer volume of it made it impossible to actually do the thing I so enjoy. Almost all of my quilting stuff is out in the garage in bins. There's one section of the floor still to clear and I know that section has the upturned contents of my go-to tools caddy which basically means I've been (gingerly) treading on a Deadly pile of rotary cutters, seam rippers, surgical stitch rippers, packages of needles, and assorted markers and mechanical pencils. Such is the state of my quilting life! Hope you are enjoying some fun projects right now. I've migrated over to the land of antique reproduction samplers... it's quite compact, which is working for me right now,,, trying to be restrained in acquisitions... I have about 14 different shades of olive silk floss so not sure how well I'm doing, lol.

Hope everyone has a great week,
Posted: 18 July 2021 - 10:23 PM
Tatoulia, had to chuckle the other day while reading your account of your mom moving and having issues with technical stuff not working and trying to stay out of the fray - I was having a parallel experience over here. As philosophical and patient as I can be in other situations, with my dad I'm kind of a zero right now, totally crispy! Good news is he sounded calm today. Hope your mom is settling in and the stress diminishes.

Your account of your neighborhood made me think The tale of "Miss Violet" would make a great young adult novel... along the. Lines of "crazy mixed up files..." :)
Posted: 18 July 2021 - 02:18 PM
Hey all,

SubC, thanks for your welcome & encouragement...

Re: becoming a prof organizer, I was so focused and motivated a few years ago I was looking into training and certification, etc. really researching it as a career... I am honestly not sure what happened - probably another bout of depression - I can't remember what derailed it but I would never believe I had gotten that far into thinking that if it weren't for the hard Physical evidence I'm now running into going through things. Kind of bizarre. And yet I mention it because I guess there's some hope in that. I can't even set it as a goal because I'm so detached from it now but I know it was "in" me at one point not too many years ago and so maybe it will be again. I know I thought I was really on the right track at the time.

Re: where are the boxes going - they are going to a very densely packed garage. I wish we could share photos on here. I've waffled over the years over what the best strategy is with this much volume. I came very close last year to hiring movers and renting commercial warehouse space to deal with it all in one place. Maybe if I can get my room under control I will by then have a better capacity for dealing with the garage or basement. The basement is less of an inconvenience to my husband, but is more of a haZard because it floods. The garage would be nicer to have emptied out but is a safer storage space.

Nothing has really gotten done this week because last Sunday night my son had (what used to be called) a grand mal seizure. This is a new thing for us so the stress was tremendous. 911, ambulance, emergency room, etc. I could go on but I won't. Additionally, tues/weds my parents moved into a retirement community. It's very nice, and still in town so it shouldn't be that big of a deal, but they were moving out of our family home where they've lived almost 60 years, so that's a lot. Plus, my dad is a "handful." He's not diagnosed with anything other than being 86 and crotchety, but he is Seriously struggling with something that causes him to pick fights with people and spin out into obsessive (?) jags where my sweet and very passive mother gets dragged along and verbally abused. We get verbally abused, too but our stress is more surrounding her getting mistreated. When we intervene she says it makes it worse for her so it's tricky. We were hopeful after the move he would try to shift gears, but instead the anxiety - I assume - over all the changes has made things worse. Hopefully once everything finds a home he will... calm down? I'm not sure my hopes are realistic. Anyway... And lastly, I ended up with yet another bug of some kind - had a fever and everything. This post Covid situation is weird. 18 months, no one caught anything, and then one of the first times we chance indoor dining (all fully vaxxed) Everyone gets sick. Home Covid tests were negative but I am not sure how accurate it all is... So that's a snapshot of my month and probably what drove me finally into seeking out some support. Which is a GOOD thing for sure.

I will be back after I re read the other posts. I am not sure how to accomplish a side by side window on my iPad.
Posted: 17 July 2021 - 12:06 PM
Good afternoon.

Oh CM, the breaking glass would have me on edge all the time. I'm glad your home is getting fixed up though!

The new little bunny us eating well now and getting a round little tummy. I was worried when she first came home because she was so tiny and light.

Can I ask why you are researching autism? Do you think it applies to you? Gave you ever taken the AQ test? It is very easy to find online.

Tatoulia, so much stress around moving your mom! I hope it shakes out alright.

I intended to work in my strawberry beds this morning because it was cool, but it is so wet. I keep waiting for it to dry out a little, and just when I think I should go it rains again.

But, I have worked in my scullery. It looks like very small or no progress, but I can see it, and it will build. I made a couple of square feet of space and laid a towel out, then I washed some things from the pile and set them out on the towel to dry. When they are dry, I can put them away or in the recycling and fill the towel again, so the pile on the counter will get smaller. Eventually I will be able to fit a bigger towel....

I did manage to throw a few small things in the waste bag.

I also dried more kale and prepped another batch of ice cream to freeze later.

Really, I feel like I've done nothing all day - but I put time into the small, hard stuff that drags me down.
Posted: 17 July 2021 - 08:37 AM
I just want to pop in - everything is more disjointed than usual still due to the home repair work going on.

At least no banging and the occasional shattering of glass until Monday. Someone who previously lived in this house thought it would be a good idea to literally glue the windows in with construction adhesive and caulk. 🙄 Our handyman had never seen that before.

This house has much weirdness. So do we, but we might be more normal if not for all the frustrations of the house! SubC, I have been investigating autism for awhile now; it's inconclusive but the maternal side cousins have various manifestations of ADHD and autism. It may be in the DNA.

Hello and hugs to SubC, Tatoulia, Lila, and also welcome to Sara. I skimmed posts and related to many things. SubC I will pray for your eyes. Hug the new bunny and all the bunnies for me.

I took roommate's bunny to the vet on Tuesday and there was nothing blatantly wrong on x-ray. So it's probably just been stress and shedding. Yesterday she finally made more rapid progress so crossing my fingers that we're past the crisis. Roommate's boy bunny has such a sensitive nature that he has had to be brought up to the living room when work is being done by his cage. He hangs out in a giant dog crate with his food and stuff. The dog is in the bedroom plus there is furniture around where the bunny stays.

Tatoulia, hang in there with mom, and I hope the two kitties get along.

Lila, get well soon! That is so irritating to get sick on days off.

Sara, I so understand about floors with paper on them. But you are persevering and that's good. I am crafty too. Trying to whittle down quilt fabric and other stash. I make the quilts for my church, that way I have the fun of designing and sewing but don't end up buried in quilts! 😅

I've been becoming concerned about the Delta variant but haven't gotten round to reading a whole lot about it. Yesterday I was so enjoying my sewing group and having all the space to really be productive - I don't want another big lockdown, and of course don't want anyone to suffer. I've noticed shortages of this and that in stores, too. The lumber shortage has impacted our repair project some.

New normal, pffft... 😛
Posted: 16 July 2021 - 09:05 PM
Don't worry about the auto correct and spell check, SubC. I'm not diligent about proofing either.

I went to mom's tonight and returned her cat. Bf came with me and we worked hard on her place. He hung all the artwork and then we went down to the old place where there was an enormous amount of stuff. G-d will have to forgive me for what I've not kept. We had to leave behind so much. Luckily some things had become moldy so that was a good excuse. We also came up with another excuse to use should mom ask about some things. We threw out all of her spices and her spice rack. It was all greasy and gross. We have a solid lie in place for some of her stuff.

I took home all of her silverware, which I am now running in the dishwasher. Her silverware tray was like nothing I'd ever seen before and it was filthy. I thought about trying to clean it in the dishwasher and ultimately decided to put it in the recycle bin. I'll have to buy a new one tomorrow.

I'm nervous about what I've decided not to keep.

Her phone is working but I'm not clear on why the internet is still not set up. She doesn't pick up on stuff too well and she can't hear and she pretends to hear. So I have no idea what the next step is. Verizon sent me a note saying the ticket is closed.

At least she is getting better antenna service in her apartment. She is on the top floor so less interference.
BF brought us Klondike bars so that was pretty nice.

More to do tomorrow. More to do.
Posted: 16 July 2021 - 07:35 PM
Tillie would surely be proud!

I was just thinking - I have a secret bunny because I was able to set up a home for the bunny in ten minutes. This is something that would not have been possible in the past, so I must be doing better. (I did have to buy the water bottle, and I know that we had at least three at one point, but that is ok. It was less than $8 with tax.)

Today I picked beans, beets, kohlrabi, cukes, some kale and one tiny tomato - yum! I still need to make pickles. I did dry about half the kale into salted snack chips and I made ice cream and hot fudge sauce. Pretty good considering our power went out for an hour and a half while the dehydrator was running and in the middle of the hot fudge sauce.

Please excuse all the words I keep getting wrong. It is a vision issue with the onscreen keyboard - sometimes I hit too many bad letters and don't realize it and spellcheck makes up a word that I don't catch. I am trying to proof read better.
Posted: 16 July 2021 - 12:31 PM
SubC, thank you for your nice long newsy post! I am so sorry to hear about the bad news at the eye doctor. Your son in law is a kind soul. What a nice surprise.

I would not have been able to eat comfortably in that situation either. BF and I still wear masks even though we are both fully vaccinated. Again, not stepping on toes and not looking for a debate. I've always sad that safety is a personal issue. When I first moved to my place, the neighborhood was becoming up-and-coming but not quite. And when people would comment, I'd say, safety is a personal issue. In truth, I liked it better when I first moved here and it was still a bit gritty. Now it's unaffordable to live here. We have a terrible opioid crisis here in Boston so there is a new form of grit but really what I am missing is the old timers. The ones who knew everyone and everybody. One of my neighbors inherited a house with someone living in it. So she inherited a brownstone with an elderly woman named Miss Violet living in it. Ah, those were the days, They have both passed away. And the restaurants were family owned. That sort of thing. Now it's students and wealthy people and it's lost the thing I liked the most about living in the city.

I will always have more to give away SubC. Thanks for noting my empty cat shelves. JUST IN CASE a kitty would like to stop by. I finally have the right thing to save for Justin Case?space! Tillie would be so proud.

Well back to work. I would like to get back into the swing of things here.
Posted: 16 July 2021 - 06:59 AM
Good morning! (Again) I write a first list to Sara and then remembered it will be below this one.

Tatoulua, I missed you and am so sorry you are overwhelmed. Moving mom must be a huge undertaking. Do you know why she was moved? Her new place sounds nice.

I am astonished every time you find more stuff to give away. I mean, you have empty shelves for storing extra cats, how can there be more to clear out?! You are inspirational! (Dh would love to have cat shelves.)

Maybe he would let the bunnies in the house. I took Trilby to school once when I was subbing for the math teacher and Trilby installed herself in a space on the manipulative shelf. - my classroom has no spaces.

The secret bunny is still a secret. She is doing well. I think I am going to bane her Beatrice. I'm trying the name on for now but it might change as she adjusts to her new surroundings and I get to know her personality.

Yesterday was a very hard day for me. But I have the best son in law in the world. Background: He had forgotten that today is his mother's birthday, so he had to cancel my day with Bean (his relationship with his mother is very complicated)

So I got some bad news at my eye appointment, but just as I came out to schedule the follow-up appointment, he walked in and handed me a sleepy, snuggly baby. He knew when my appointment was and decided that since I didn't get to see Bean today, he would drive up and pick up his contacts while I was there so I could have some Bean cuddles. They were just the thing.

Then Dh took me out to lunch, which I thought would be a good thing, but it was awful. Disclaimer: I don't know everyone's vaccine position and I very much do not want to start a debate or argument here, but I need to share how the experience made me personally FEEL, ok? So we had just started eating and two men sat down in a booth right next to us and began having a loud discussion in which they revealed that they were not vaccinated, their social groups were not vaccinated, and they did not believe health precautions were needed. At which point I began to feel sick to my stomach, and couldn't eat or have a conversation with Dh because all I could focus on was how close one guy's head was to my dh's head and how dh got the j&j vaccine, which is less effective, and how contagious Delta is, and how my friend's vaccinated brother is currently sick with Covid, and how Bean can't be vaccinated, and I had to get my lunch boxed up and leave.

And then between that and my bad exam news, I just cried in the car. I have forgotten how to be in the world. I am out of practice and all my hard won coping skills have atrophied and I think if it weren't for Bean I would just quit my job and become a recluse. But on Monday I am going to take him to the county fair and show him his very first cow.

And I wanted to come home, but I had planned to go to the special amazing grocery store for the first time in two years because we were near it and Dh made me go. And it was not fun either, but at least it was not awful. And now I have nuts and spices and so much amazing fruit including a whole case of peaches to can (this weekend? They are not ripe enough yet) and I bought myself a box of Japanese candy that I like and haven't had in over two years, but then I ate almost the whole box because I was too worn out for self control.

So, yeah. Garden and food management today I think. In the interest of complete stuff disclosure - my acquired items included two bags of rice from which I will likely save the cloth bags and one jam in a canning jar.
Posted: 16 July 2021 - 06:10 AM
Good morning! Welcome! Welcome back! I kept the lights on....

Sara (is it ok if we use your name and it your "name"?),

You probably could help others - and we others hope you will. Other people's stuff is easier than your stuff, and you understand why we are struggling and so can be kind.

I'm glad you found the chat helpful. I am not the chatting type, so I have never tried it. I hope you will come here too.

You are doing an amazing job on your floor! Where are the bins going that your husband is "carrying out"? I heard you say that he was not kind at the beginning, but it sounds like he is giving you the kind of help you need now, which is very good.

It is great that you have identified problem areas and easier spots! If you are feeling overwhelmed and frustrated from challenges or slow progress (papers are everyone's bane, they are always so terribly slow for the space they take up!) you can switch out and do clothes for a bit!

I'm a teacher and have sooooo many school supplies. Do you mind sharing your son's educational placement? (Home, traditional, supported classroom...) is he an only child?

I like your hashtag, and keep us updated on that floor!
Posted: 15 July 2021 - 09:44 PM
Sorry I've been absent, everyone! Just overwhelmed, I'm afraid.

Mom was moved to a different room in her assisted living. I decided to stay out of it because I'm a nervous wreck. The move was today and although the technician came out, the phone and internet are not working. So they are sending a second tech tomorrow.

Her new room is beautiful. Hardwood floors and granite countertops. Everything is brand new and beautiful. I have been so stressed about this. I did convince her to get a smaller table and my friend and I went thrift shopping and found a beautiful drop leaf table for two that matches her chairs. We brought it in the same day and removed the old one. Other than that mom became angry at my suggestions to get rid of other stuff.

I have her cat here because it was too much in and out with the movers today. I am exhausted from the emotional stress. Funny, tonight she offered her aide three coach bags and the aide wrote to me to ask about them. I said absolutely take if she's offering. So when I went over tonight I said, please take them. I also had given this aide five purses and a few wallets earlier this week. I gave her a beautiful silk purse I bought in Japan and a lovely leather clutch from Paris. I have two of the Paris ones and I gave her the red one, which I am pretty sure I never carried. It was hard to get rid of these things but I did it and I'm proud of myself.

My cleaners came on Wednesday and today is garbage night so I'm feeling pretty good about those things.

Lila I hope you are feeling better. Cm I'm amazed at how well you are holding up with the construction! SubC you bought a secret agent bunny! Sara, welcome and thank you for giving us a glimpse of your life! We are here for you!

Okay I've showered and am going to bed. Goodnight everyone. Don't forget me! I've just been overwhelmed.
Posted: 15 July 2021 - 08:46 PM
Continued from below... I've basically moved all clothes to laundry area to was or send to cleaners... I've probably made it through half of that project... or less. Forgetting many loads of wash along the way... another category is crafts. All of that is getting boxed up except for two bins of current projects. I am keeping one bin of current paper work, and one bin is toiletries and clean clothes. I cleaned out a few dresser drawers and asked my husband to fix the broken ones,l I cleared off a lot of the most important fragile stuff that was "shanghaied" on top of my dresser... I repackaged and secured a very valuable item that's very tiny and is always a concern that I will lose in this huge mess.

I've read a little more in the organizing book... "buried" I did some of the chapter 4 exercises. I found the stuff that resonated with me was that a lot of my issues have to do with memory issues or perceived memory issues. No, I really do have memory issues... and control issues. My scores were over 10 for every category though so I have a pretty entrenched situation here... I also reflected on "creating burdensome situations + ADD is a lethal combo... and that I'm "under thinking consequences."

Lastly, I've given some thought to what my biggest challenges might be in "clearing out" these hoards. In terms of volume, the biggest challenge is the bins of mixed paperwork. There's both a huge volume, and it's extremely slow work. I have no attachment to clothes - I'm fine going through things and paring down. I also hoard books but don't have too much trouble paring back when I do focus on it. I have an immense and overwhelming hoard of expensive quilting fabric. I also have 30 or 40 boxes of Christmas stuff. Realistically I think it should be 10 or less. The real emotional black hole of the whole situation is related to my son who has special needs. I finally had some success getting rid of some baby clothes but held on to much of it intending to sell it which I never did. I also have 4x more than I could ever use of school supplies for him. This is a psychological vortex for me. I think it's good that I know there's a problem and have a realistic idea of how much is reasonable to have but the actual process of getting rid of it will be a challenge,

Ok, I know this is kind of a journal entry and sorry so long but I just wanted to put this info out there in the universe. Looking forward to getting to know you and hearing any suggestions if you've experienced some of the same things,

Sending good vibes out to everyone tonight,

Posted: 15 July 2021 - 08:17 PM
Hi all, hi @subclinical and thanks for suggesting this thread. I participated in the Sunday night chat a couple weeks ago which I found really friendly and helpful. I've had an unusual amount of chaos in my life this month but I know that's not going to be typical so I'm ok with having limited progress thE last few weeks but don't want to lose my momentum going forward.

I did do some shopping which is not on my "plan" but have to smile and shine a light on the fact that 2/5 of what I bought were two Marie Kondo books. I don't know if this is a "type" But I have to admit I'm that person who thinks I could help other hoarders way more than any hoarding coach even while still having a hoarded up house. Just a little delusional in this sphere perhaps. Haha.

Taking a deep breath before I write this "confessional..." I guess this hoarding situation is by nature a secretive thing to some degree, so while I try to be honest with close friends about my situation, a lot of times people will say "no, you're not a hoarder..." and I'm like if you could see my room, my garage or my basement, you would see that I am. I think it would be helpful here for me to be really specific about what I'm doing which will cause me to be say things I've never said "out loud."

Anyway, my focus has been on my room. My husband has the master, Which is clean, and I moved out to the guest room A few years ago for various reasons. I've boxed up and he's cArried out about 15-20 bins so far. There's enough crap in here to fill 40 bins I'm pretty sure. This ain't my first rodeo. I've probably hauled out 4 garbage bags of garbage and paper that may once have been important but has been on the floor getting "churned" for so long it is now garbage. He wanted to take a shovel to it and naturally proposed that in the least sensitive way possible, but I truly felt like I needed to go through every scrap because I'm afraid something "important" Will get tossed... some of that worry is probably delusional and some of that worry is legitimate. Happy to say that even though that task seemed insurmountable - partly because it is so gross - as it turns out, was not insurmountable. I did get through more than half of it and could probably get the rest of that task done in two more sessions. See, spelling it out like this is helpful to me... and hopeful. I need hope! #keephopealive! 😆😘 the general idea was to completely empty this room, clean it, maybe repaint it, make some adjustments to the furniture and then bring back only a carefully selected and appropriate amount of stuff for the room... so far I'm still mainly dealing with clearing garbage off the floor... but good news is there is about 10 square feet of bare wood floor showing right now... sorry I'm rambling... more in a sec.
Posted: 15 July 2021 - 04:00 PM
Hi Lila,

I'm sorry you're sick. Do you think it's from your outing?
Posted: 15 July 2021 - 01:36 PM
Be careful what you wish for... I said in my past post I was annoyed and considering calling in "sick" but didn't. Well, now I am actually sick. And on day 2 "off." I plan to be home through Monday and go back if I am better. But how annoying that my husband is gone and instead of enjoying it and decluttering I am sitting on the couch in a daze, blowing my nose every 30 seconds. Sigh.

Hopefully I will feel better soon so I can start working on the clutter again.
Posted: 14 July 2021 - 08:40 PM

I hope everybody is ok.

I worked in my studio for an hour tonight. Mostly cleaning up boxes and paper. Small (6 wine bottle sized) box of recycling, half a grocery bag of trash. Washed and put away a few brushes and tucked a couple of things into the box to go back to school.

I'm not doing very well on that 100 hour challenge, but I'm doing some things. (I also spent two hours mulching my raspberries - used up some of the cardboard that was stored in the studio.)

Load of dishes, load of laundry, almost caught up on both.

Eye dr. Tomorrow.
Posted: 13 July 2021 - 06:48 PM
I bought a rabbit.
And a rabbit water bottle.

She's seven weeks old. She should still be with her mother, but a raccoon killed her mother and they were selling the babies for $10 each and I didn't take all 5. Or even 2. I think I showed amazing self control. I also think I won't tell Dh. It could be a while before he notices.
Posted: 13 July 2021 - 02:40 PM
I am struggling a little today because my morning started with the plumber and an email about administrative changes at work - not bad changes necessarily except that most change is bad. (I've been watching a lot of Aspie videos this summer and am starting to just embrace the label.)

But I cleaned up Bean's toys and the dishwasher is running for the second time and I've stripped the bed and done two loads of wash. I also cleaned out the dryer duct while Dh had it detached.

I made TWO phone calls, talked with dd2 who was having a bad day and made her feel better (I think), hard boiled half a dozen eggs for quick lunch ingredients, made (and ate) a batch of popovers, and brewed a pitcher of ice tea.

So, even though I haven't found the energy to attack any of my big projects, I'm doing ok.
Posted: 13 July 2021 - 05:37 AM
Yesterday I had Bean.

I gave his parents a trunk load of recycling for sil to drop off at the moop castle. (Big downtown recycling hub for almost anything)

I also dropped a little bag of trash in the can when I got gas.

The plumber is coming today.

More rain and I need to start putting produce up.
Posted: 11 July 2021 - 08:40 PM
CM, when my bunny had fleas the vet gave her Program for kittens. The fleas bite the bunny, can't reproduce, and die off.

Mine are super long haired and get dried papaya chunks regularly to avoid wool block. They love the treat.

I'm glad your house is progressing, but oh my! Workmen every day! Ack!

Hang in there and try to stay off your knees you can.
Posted: 11 July 2021 - 07:24 PM
What a week it was and still lots going on. So much so that I don't have time to post a lot yet. The work on the house is quite involved but I think progressing well. Workmen coming daily M-F.

I've been getting some organization and projects done, and also have some new resources to work with on planning financial and practical matters, which will mean new busyness and paperwork but hopefully all for the good.

But so much is happening that sometimes my energy just poops out. My knee has been slightly gimpy from overuse, I don't know if it's the MCL ligament, bursitis, or what. Dr. Google is not very helpful. But I got an elastic support band and ice packs, which do give relief.

Roommate's bunny is under the weather. Our poor animals - and we humans - have still been battling those cussed fleas. The bunnies seem free of them but they've also been shedding. My girl had had a go round with ingested hair, which rabbits can't just eject the way cats can. Now roommate's girl bunny is needing hairball remedy and hand feeding to keep her digestive tract moving.

It's been cray cray. Better go now and do whatever needs doing next.
Posted: 11 July 2021 - 06:03 PM
I didn't get my yard work done.

My day started out really well.

Dh was working on the leak in the pipe in the basement and I was working on cleaning up the basement (I found a very small number of things for goodwill/recycling) I also found a case of pints of jam that are ten years old. I gave one to the chickens today. I will try to remember to give one to the chickens every day until all the jars are empty and washed out. All I can do is better....

But then I had a fight with Dh, which completely derailed me. I made pancakes and ate most of them and watched videos on the couch. Fighting with Dh is the worst.

We are ok now, but he is sad and tired and his back hurts and he couldn't fix the leak so we will have to call a plumber. And I am sad and tired and hating myself for wasting the day.

The dishwasher is running.

I can't do laundry because he disconnected the dryer to make room to fix the pipes.
Posted: 11 July 2021 - 06:35 AM
Yay Lila!

I am so glad to hear you got your stuff out!

And wow on the fridge. Just the fridge - no cabinets - would be a whole day for me! My fridge is full of produce. I want to make pickles and cheese, but not enough to make it a priority at the moment. (I am learning to be honest about how I allocate my time and energy.)

I hate that feeling when you lose something important. It will get better as you get more organized and have less stuff.
As for the tank top, let it go. It wasn't needed or it would have been claimed earlier. You don't want to teach people that they never have to think about the future or store or care for their own things. You asked. More than once even.

Good luck on your next stage!

I hope your event went ok.

Yesterday the kids brought Bean over and nearly finished my mobile chicken coop. Bean is so full of excitement and joy! He just shrieks and laughs all the time.

Sil is going to the moop castle next week, and I have started a pile of stuff for him to take for me.

Bean and I worked in my studio a little bit yesterday. We started a box to go back to school and found two cookie cutters to donate. (His job was taking the cookie cutters out of the bin, tasting them, and showing them to me one at a time before checking to be sure gravity worked on them.)

Today it is supposed to rain a lot. It rained all last night, so everything is wet, but I am still going to try to do some work in the yard during dry stretches. Otherwise - maybe I will make progress on the house.
Posted: 10 July 2021 - 05:21 PM
Yes SubC, I meant the other posters. Looks like a few have come back! Hi everyone.

I did take all that stuff to donate. They came home, he did not say a word to me, which is good. Now he is gone again on a family emergency. I think I will have a week or two to get rid of some more things before he gets back. I have no motivation but I am going to force myself, starting tomorrow.

Today I cleaned out the fridge (he is a fridge hoarder too, meaning, nothing gets throw out and he always wants to keep spoiled food so I usually hide it in the trash on trash day. But today I took everything out and cleaned the fridge and put the good things back and tossed the rest. I also cut up some fruit and froze it so it wouldn't go bad. I am proud of myself. It is so much nicer. I also threw out some very old stuff from the freezer and cabinets.

That is all I will get done today. I have to go to an event that I am not excited about and am so exhausted but have to go (commitment). I am going to stay for the absolute minimum time which is about 3 hours. I will go hide in a room by myself for some of that time because it is overwhelming.

I have gotten to the emotional point where I am angry and DONE with my junk because I can never find anything. It was one of my kids' birthday last week and I LOST two of their presents!!! How do you lose presents in a bedroom??? It is either in the bedroom or on the piled up counter. And if you have been reading my posts you know the LOADS of boxes, bins and bags that have gone out of my bedroom!! It is so frustrating. I feel ready to get rid of EVERYTHING but then it seems the second I get rid of something I need it. For 2 years my daughter has been saying she did not want 2 tubs of clothes. I held onto them because they were expensive and she might change her mind. Finally last week I donated them without her knowing, and TODAY she asks me where this certain tank top is!!! It was donated. UGH.

Anyway I am in an irritable mood because I really just want to stay home but instead I have to go get ready, put makeup on, do my hair, find something to wear, and go out in this heat and be around people. I considered calling in "sick" but I know I would really regret it, so I have to go.
Posted: 07 July 2021 - 07:55 PM
Sounds like a delightful day, SubC! And the Bean loves his vegetables!

I would like to go finish friend's laundry. I'm showered and in my pjs. I should go assess the situation. I'd love to have it all finished for her even if it is too heavy. She needn't take it all tomorrow.

Since I gave her all the bedding I bought in December in anticipation of her stay, I can't really offer to have her sleep over tmr night. She'll probably want to go home, anyway, to spend time with her cat.

I'll have clean sheets tmr night, after my ladies change them for me. The biggest luxury for me is clean sheets and clean pajamas.
Posted: 07 July 2021 - 07:30 PM
have fun with your friend!

I miss tillie too. Sometimes I go read old posts to "hear" her voice.

Very tired at the moment. Had a fun but full day with Bean. He ate so much kohlrabi for dinner! Then we had ice cream. He also seemed tired when his Daddy picked him up - at 8 - instead of me taking him to Dd after work, so we got dinner and the evening with him and no driving.

I am up one finger painted rooster (dsil brought it. Bean did the fingerpainting and Dd sketched the rooster over the colors.)

Also I have a new soft commitment - I told dsil I will be happy to have bean two days a week in the summer if it is ok with Dd.

I will be caught up on laundry if I put the dry shirts away, but I am behind on dishes now and want to change our sheets tomorrow.
Posted: 07 July 2021 - 06:16 PM
I was able to get one load of friends laundry done today. Only have one more. The laundry room was a busy place.

I'm cooking her dinner tomorrow night so she will be here and I'm pretty excited about that. My cleaners come tomorrow.

Went for a very hot walk with BF and now it's thundering out.

I have cat laundry to do.

I'm a bit scattered but am getting a lot of work done tonight so there's that. The thunder is very scary but so far kitty hasn't run away. She's looking scared but staying on the couch

Missing Tillie a lot.
Posted: 07 July 2021 - 09:45 AM
I need the discipline for two hours a day on a project. Who can help me figure it out? Something other than fooling around with my iPad!

Will write more later! Keep up the good work, CM and SubC! And Lila and others!
Hoarding Help Message Boards : The Daily Chat : What are you doing today (part 15)

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