Good morning.

I slept 10.5 hours.

It is overcast and dreary here.

Lila, Bean is almost 16 months and yes, he is the center of the universe.

My Dh is a keeper of nothing - not strictly true, he has a few sentimental items, but if he decided to leave me, he could probably move out of the house in one trip with our truck and then he would have to send people to fetch the piano. His tools would require a second truck trip. He tries to be patient with the hoarding, but sometimes he loses his temper. He has gotten better as I have gotten better.

Congratulations on your paths, your new bed, and your donations! I hope that the large items (both size and value) find a goid path out of your life quickly. That would be a good boost!

Your "helping" friend was inconsiderate and judgey. Helping someone does not give you a right to obstruct them. Also, there is no way I would do that every week. I'm pretty sure Tatoulia's cleaners don't do all that every week!

I understand the table/bar situation. Piles are my downfall. I keep trying to unbury the counter in my scullery room and it just keeps getting worse all fall. I know I would be more functional if I could use it and clean it off each day, but I just can't seem to get there.

I think you have a good plan for your rocking chair.

Did you move the dog stairs?

Back later to catch up with everyone else!

decluttering update -

Yesterday I managed to get those old sheets and blanket picked up for someone's dog bedding. Got my new sheets and blanket washed and put on my bed. They were very comfy last night but I was cold! So today I will do more "closet shopping" and find a second blanket to put on top. The bedspread I have makes me TOO hot. It is new so need to decide where to put that.

I also listed one medium sized thing for sale. It is not sold yet but I will drop the price as needed. In fact I have a friend who might be able to use it so will offer it to her if it isnt sold soon.

Tatoullia, the big item I might owe money on is a $3k medical device I bought in monthly installments last year. The company went through a terrible time so they stopped contacting me for payment, but I either paid it off or only owe one more payment. It's complicated because they added one accessory near the end so the original contract is not accurate. I need to find it, add up the payments and pay whatever I owe, and then I can sell it and have some real $$ which I need.

I did not move the dog stairs yet so that is probably the very next thing I will do when I get up from this couch.

I also will do a little 15 minutes of something in my room again to get it improved.

Here is an item I need help with:
I have very few things from my childhood. But I have kept this little rocking chair that I got when I was like 2. It is super cute and has nice memories with it, and when I was 9 my neighbor reupholstered it for me in actual leather, so it is a really nice little chair for a child under about 5 years old. I have a grandd who is 2. Giving it to them is not an option because sweet dil allows grandd to grab markers and color the walls, furniture, etc sometimes and I would be upset if it was ruined... and also they 'purge' items often and seem to have no connection to any item as special. So it stays here. I also have a grad on the way. It would be a nice chair to have in a playroom but now the playroom was taken over by my son (kids traded rooms etc) so it has to be in my bedroom or the living room. I have a puppy that still chews sometimes. Well maybe it's not as big of a dilemma as I thought, as I type this out I guess the answer is to set up a little reading area in my room for now, and next year when my pup is better behaved I could make that space in the living room. Or in a playroom if son changes rooms or moves out. Any other thoughts are welcome!!

I am praying for your son and you, Road! It is so hard not knowing what's going on so try not to think about scenarios. It could be a misread like you said, so try and let it go until the consult. My dd also missed so much of high school and now wants to quit online school and get a GED. I am sad about her not getting the experience, but will support her in this is it's really what she wants.

Tatoulia, wow. You sound like you've come such a long way! Putting things back etc. And having cleaners! That would be impossible, or at least very embarrassing, for me. I have done the dash n stash method before the pandemic - if company was coming, or when I had a car accident and needed help so friends were coming to help clean - I always threw everything from the dining/living room into boxes and laundry baskets and threw them all in my bedroom. That's a good part of why my room got like it did. I remember 3 years ago when 2 friends came to clean my kitchen and living room because of my injuries. I did my best to wipe it down before they came and had the clutter hidden. But one lady who is quite matter-of-fact said something to me as she was cleaning. It was something like 'you have to keep this up, and do it every week.' She was getting on chairs and dusting the freaking ceiling, washing light fixtures, wiping down every cabinet etc... things I generally might do once every 2 or 3 years. I felt bad.

Now since I got sick a couple months ago, my kitchen table and bar/counter are piled with stuff. For my son's birthday I managed to get everything off the table (onto the bar and my bedroom) but it is piled back up so we can't eat there. I hate it and want to take care of it but it is even more overwhelming than my bedroom, so I am doing one space at a time. I think I am close to the point where I will be stopping on my bedroom soon and the kitchen table/bar counter will come next. I dread it. But will talk about it here as I go... that helps.

And I was gonna say sub c, that's so nice you got flowers. Teenagers are so funny. I mean, that is a *major award!*

Lila, that's one of the rare pluses of a hoarding problem... you can shop for brand new things in your house without spending any money! I was just looking at some kitchen accessories to try to finish-finish my kitchen and I found this one thing that is kind of a retro chicken wire little cubby shelving thingy... (say that 3x fast) and I was like " heeeey, I think I have one of those already.." 😫🧐🥴

Alright I guess I better call it a night.

Tomorrow we have plans to see the new Wes Anderson with my niece. Say good thoughts that she will hold it together and not flake out and disappoint my son tomorrow...

Hello everyone! Nice to read your very social posts in spite of the scary events going on in your lives. Road, I am grateful to your BFF for giving you the support that allowed you to call the neurosurgeon. This is a very scary time of "what ifs" for you and I'm glad you have support! I do hope your son will be able to participate in the Special Olympics.

Lila, tell me more about getting rid of one large item. What are you considering? And what does it mean you might owe money on it? Do you use the rent to own model of getting furniture? Because selling it could declutter your physical space and your financial space if you are paying monthly on something. Congratulations on clean sheets and new blanket! That is terrific!

CM, what a spate of sad news. I am so sorry. I'm happy to hear from you and glad you are working through this.

SubC! That floral class sounds terrific! What a nice thing for the students and the teachers! Congratulations!

Lila, no strong Boston accent here as my Midwestern roots show up at odd times! But I'm sure I sound a bit Boston to others!

So I went to the Museum of Fine Arts today with a friend and her kids. We met at BF's office first then to the museum. I then stayed at the museum after they left. I went back to the gift shop and had a fairly large cache of things I was buying and nearly one by one, I put them back. I did keep two books. One I'll read and donate and one I'll read and send to a friend.

Tonight I started shopping on the Macy's website for a throw blanket and mercifully stopped, identified that I do have a winter throw blanket, and also id'd that I have several cat fleeces to keep my friend warm. I'd given a favorite and fairly new throw to my friend when she moved out and I gave her some cat fleeces. But I still think I'll have enough. If it turns out that I really need a winter throw, I'll purchase it. But not until I determine the need.

My cleaners came this AM just before I left for the museum. BF came down and set the alarm for me. Yes I'm a city mouse!

They'd never come in the AM before so it was a bit shocking for all of us. I bet they had cancellations due to Veterans Day. And something happened yesterday where they couldn't come. One nice thing about having them every week is my house is never dirty.

I too struggle with space, Road I have gotten rid of so much yet still think I have no room. I think part of it is a mind trick. I used to have stacks of stuff. Now I do not. You could vacuum or mop my place and not have to move anything beyond the furniture. I used to have unusable kitchen counters. But now I have one, clean space. It pays off to get rid of the stuff. It's peaceful now.

Oops
And then see what the surgeon says on the 8th and go from there. I saw plenty of scary words under the "long term prognosis" and "morbidity" sub heads but I am not reading those. This condition is one you read about when you're a new mom (with a baby with Down syndrome) but in the last 18 years having met hundreds of other families, I've never actually known anyone who got diagnosed with this. Gee I hate being the rare exception in cases like these...

Lila, I love hearing about your progress. It's motivating to me. I had so many things to say but now I am blanking out. I will have to check back again.

Sub c. I did manage to go back and deal with the laundry. Funny annoying thing was then I forgot to turn on the dryer and it molded in there overnight!!!! Oh well. I did fold the rest of the stuff and updated my calendar and crossed a few more things off my list. I am still adjusting to post COVID (not actually past COVID) realities of there being things to put on a calendar again. I was really feeling horrible about missing it on my sons entire high school career and it's almost over and I realized half of it was kind of lost to COVID. I mean the football games and basketball games, the dances - things he'd enjoy... I've gotten more neurotic Also but he hasn't been in school a huge chunk of his high school years. Same boat as the rest of humanity. Just another mental adjustment that has to be made.

Oh, and the puppy is a maltipoo. She's 3/4 poo and extremely hyper. My husband had a coworker who had just gotten her And timing was bad because she had a life crisis and wa# desperate to get her off her hands basically. My husband asked me and I said no twice and then I said ok, and then we ended up having some crises and it was terrible timing, but things are evening out a little now.

Hey all, happy to report I am out from under the cloud. Still a serious situation but yesterday I was in such a state I kept bursting into tears.

Today my bff came over (the one who dislocated her shoulder a bit ago - she made a great recovery) and we talked for hours and I vented it all and we covered her stuff as well, and then when she left I called and made the neurosurg. Appt. and actually felt better afterwards because the nurse was so matter of fact and did not think it would be treated like an emergency - more of a monitoring situation than imminent surgery, which was a big relief. They think he has atlantoaxial instability which means your c-1&c-2 are so slippy it's dangerous. The numbers indicated on the summary report put him in the "severe instability" and "requires surgical repair" categories. They'd be fusing 2 or more vertebrae together. It would also likely exclude him from quite a few sports and make his amazing but violent dance moves nervewracking for me instead of the highlight of my life. BUT... as much as I am prone to believing I know everything, I'm not actually a doctor so my interpretation of this report could be wrong, the X-ray could have been done wrong or interpreted incorrectly for a person with the anatomy of a person with Down syndrome... whatever, so we will see what the neurologist says on the 23rd and

okay! All caught up on your posts and feeling motivated.

I decided I am done sleeping on worn sheets (with some holes, even) with a ripped blanket (I love my soft sheets and blanket so have resisted change). I posted them on a group that uses old towels and sheets and blankets for dog bedding and someone said yes they want them. I am about to bag them up to be picked up. Then I looked in 2 closets until I found a brand new set of sheets and a brand new blanket of the same type of soft fabric, purchased years ago and never opened. I got them all out and the new sheets are in the wash, and the new blanket will follow. Will be making my bed and sleeping on the brand new sheets tonight! Plus now I have a pretty good sized open space on my closet shelf. I need to look around my room and see what would fit there, that I really want to keep.

I took all the donations and dropped them off this week too. So I need to find a box and start up again. I will work on my room some more today, little bits at a time. I also need to clean my kitchen and do my laundry (clothes).

I still cannot believe how cluttered my bedroom is, still. I bet I have taken out at least 6 trips to the donation place, gave away things, and threw away many bags and yet, it is so piled up. It's like the clutter is breeding! But I don't think I am bringing new stuff in so... hmmm.

I do have paths to the closet and dressers and windows now. I have a set of great big dog stairs in there that my dog used to climb onto my bed with. I don't need them anymore at this point but I do have an older dog who might need them. I will try and find space for them in the garage today. Maybe I can donate something out of the garage to make space. That will free up a big spot in my room.

My other goal for today is to take pictures of one large item in there and post it for sale and hope I can get a little cash out of it (and make space). I also need to figure out if and how I can sell one other large item. I might own money on it, I am not sure, so I need to find the contract and see. Then contact people who might want to buy it. And if no interest then I will post it online.

Wears me out thinking about all that, but having it typed here will help me stay on track. I will give myself extra time tomorrow and Saturday to get it all done, but am going to get as much of that done as I can today!

Waiting to hear about your lives and your decluttering adventures.

Road Toad (lol) -
Oh wow, do you know yet what is going on with your son? I wish we had a more private forum to talk because my child also had to see a neurologist and a neurosurgeon, was diagnosed with scary things, was going to have spine/skull/brain surgery to fix it but they weren't even sure it could be fixed. Part of it was cranial instability. Part was some of their brain was extending down out of the skull into the spinal column. We ended up getting this fixed in a more non invasive manner a couple years ago and they are healthy now. Praying for your boy!

Also curious what kind of puppy you have! I have a German shepherd puppy.

Tatoullia, Boston! Great, I can almost hear your accent! I am more of a country or suburb person because big cities scare me. But my cousin lives in NYC and loves it, walks everywhere, doesn't even have a car. So I understand that.

CM, death is very hard. I hate that heavy feeling of loss. One of my dear friends died from covid and I have the funeral in a week. I also went to a funeral recently of my friend's teen who died by suicide. So terrible!! It sort of freezes me for a few days with sadness.

Going back to read more people's posts.

hi friends, wow! All these great posts to go through! I seem to get super busy Sunday through Wednesday, then sometimes I have a free Thurs. Am almost always home Fri/Sat which is when my mind goes back to decluttering.

SubC, how old is your Bean? My grandd is almost 3 and she is the light of my life. I try to go get her and bring her over once or twice a week. I am working on having more energy and being intentional about it. Before I got sick a couple months ago, I used to have her family over for dinner 2 or 3 nights a week. But I have only cooked 2 or 3 times in the last few months. I was so drained by being sick and am still getting my energy back.

The whole garage thing makes my nerves hurt! I can't imagine. I'm glad you are doing okay with that. How is your dh about the clutter and stuff? Is he understanding? Mine is a more severe hoarder of everything, like empty boxes and used paper towels. Mine is I call "milder" as all of my bins, totes and piles are stuff that is (to me) useful. I am working on my clutter but he refuses to work on his. He has boxes of receipts from the 70s (like for milk, bread, toilet paper) and boxes of clothes from then, with holes in them and won't go through any of it. So I am careful not to create too much space where he can add more. But he has nothing in my bedroom (another whole story... he has his own room) so I can clear that space. But it is taking so long!

Will go back and read others' posts now.

Good morning!

Road, I hope you remembered your laundry.

Good for you working on the iep.

A referral to a neurosurgeon would frighten me as well.

Your comment on"all the living things." reminded me that there was a time not too long ago when I was clinging to the nightly mantra "nothing died today" for reassurance. Like whatever else happened, as long as death hadn't visited my barn in the shape of a raccoon or a hawk or disease or old age or bad genetics, or. the day wasn't that bad. Because I had had so many adverse events I was literally approaching the barn braced for one.

So, I am in a better place. I expect all the animals to be alive, present, healthy and accounted for. I expect my basement to be dry and my pantry to be free of mice. I expect my classes to meet in person. I expect my car to be reliable. I expect to have Bean every Monday.

My next 50 hours are going to be a mix of trying to force myself to do things, doing things I wish I was better prepared for, moments of actual fun I am guarding ferociously, and sleep. Saturday I will try to catch up on things. So many, many things.

Yesterday the "florist and floriculture" classes celebrated "kindness week". At lunch time I had a young brother/sister pair I teach bring me their flower arrangement with a really sweet card thanking me for being kind. Then after school I ran into a 16y.o. student who was coming up the stairs toward my room (not heading out of the building). He was holding a vase of flowers and I genuinely thought someone had chosen him and said "oh, those are really nice." He said "thanks. Do you want them? I have to give them to somebody before I go home." The other kids had pretty much drained out of my floor, and he only has three teachers upstairs - one goes home early and he was walking away from the second. So I'm going to flatter myself that that was 16 y.o. Boy for "these are for you."

I don't think I have said much if anything about some recent disappointments with my admin, but when I came home with the flowers, Dh said "Your administration finally realized what a valuable employee you are and apologized?" And I laughed and said "Right. < sarcastic. But the people I actually work for love me." I needed that this week.

Hi people,

Alright I managed to deal with the abandoned laundry. I brought up the two baskets of clean stuff, folded towels... and started rewashing the stuff I forgot. If I get down there again tonight it should be ok.

Hit the store for some essentials, cooked some chicken breasts for whatever. All the living things have been fed and medicated and nurtured to some degree and now I'm hiding out in my room to gather myself a bit.

The stuff with my son hit me hard today. I have a cloud of doom hanging over my head. I heard from the drs office that she is referring him to a neurosurgeon in addition to the neurologist we are already scheduled to see. This has me pretty well terrified. I'm fearing she saw something on the X-ray in addition to the vertebrae issue... speculation. I know I just need to schedule this appt and hopefully it will be soon. My bff is coming over tomorrow to help with medical stuff. The H is overloaded this week with conferences and b-ball games so - but even if he wasn't he doesn't let any of this type of thing really land on him. Well, I can't dwell on it anymore, I'm gonna go back to trying not to think about it - wish me luck.

Tomorrow I will get that appointment scheduled for my son, and one for myself too - and have a chat with my friend about what's going on. I've gotten some of the iep to dos crossed off my list or started so I will try to take the next step on each of those.

Good Morning!
coffee clinks.

CM, I am sorry about your friends and the bunny.

Road, I know you are worried about your son. I hope that things turn out ok. Better safe than sorry on the X-ray.

Hop to that laundry!

No progress here, just keep writing checks my body can't cash. Looking forward to the thanksgiving break - we get a whole week.

Putting this here as a visual marker for myself

💙💙💙💙💙

I'll have quite a few of your posts to catch up on. That will let me know where to start.

Last week was rough. On Sunday we didn't notice till evening that my roommate's little bunny girl hadn't eaten and didn't want to move. So I started the hand feeding. She still hadn't made much progress the next morning so we got an appointment with a vet. That vet referred us to another vet who attempted surgery to remove the blockage of fur in the tummy. But poor little girl's heart gave out. 💔 😰

That same day I had called a friend from my church quilting group and her husband had died in his sleep in the night. A couple days later I got the news that another lady who led the quilting group for a long time, and who had been operated on for cancer in the summer, had passed away. This week I went to the one lady's husband's funeral Monday and tomorrow morning will attend the quilt leader's funeral.

So it's just been a rather heavy feeling time. Other things as well, and a couple of happier things. Also I don't like the time change but I'm trying not to let it get me down. Roommate will be out of town Thursday through Sunday so I have some intentions of tackling clutter here. I'm actually feeling positive and purposeful about that.

For those of you who deal with ADHD, by the way, I started taking L-Theanine supplements and I think they are helping me be more resilient and less prone to sudden temper flare-ups. Just thought I'd pass that along.

Hullo people.

Well, good news is I scheduled my dogs stitches thing and grooming as one thing. I forgot the clinic does grooming. So she will get that done Saturday. Check check.

Bad news is I heard back from the doctor about my sons X-ray and there was something wrong with it. Luckily we are already going to see a neurologist in a few weeks but this means he will be excluded from his special olympics basketball team which will be very disappointing seeing as how it just started and he's been waiting for two years for this. Best case scenario is they read it wrong or did the X-ray wrong and he's absolutely fine. Worst case scenario likely requires surgery and puts him in a high risk category for spinal injury. So this day really took a nose dive. I was already worried he had a brain tumor. This parenting thing is not for sissies. And I'm a sissy. I guess we will see this neurologist and he will prob order an mri Or something and we will go from there. As the day progressed it seemed more likely that he didn't need to have this X-ray after all, that the dr. Made a mistake and misunderstood the requirements and so I was ticked about that but then I thought if there really is something wrong we probably wouldn't have caught it if we hadn't had to get this X-ray done. Now if there's a major issue we can deal with it at least.

Alright now I know as soon as I sign off someone else will walk in and be stuck talking to them selves all day tomorrow. Lol.

Laundry is still molding as I type.

Good evening all!

Hello troad. I am the journaler, CM is a writer.

Nice job getting inexpensive glasses! Mine are dreadful even with some insurance.

I have a love hate relationship with IEPs. For one, I think every child should have one. And in contrast, I think all the documentation and hoop jumping is a dreadful waste of time. Because the place I teach is not legally a school, we don't have to honor them, so I only have to participate in them when a child is reentering formal schooling. It seems like the schools never want to know the things I find most important about the kids. Otoh, I have pages and pages of email conversations with some parents that actually serve the purpose for which the IEPs are intended. And are so much more flexible...

Keep defending your space!

My garage has no floor.

Hi, I'm back again. I went to the eye drs. All went well. I was afraid of various things but they were all mostly baseless. Nothing wrong with my eyes other than getting older so luckily I didn't do too much damage totally abusing and neglecting my vision the last 6 years. Picked out some (Slightly) sassy frames and walked out of there with hardly a dent in my credit card and a huge sense of relief.

Next up, need to get puppy's stitches out from getting fixed and then schedule her a grooming appt as it seems she has very high maintenance hair...

Also high priority and high anxiety and high avoidance... iep stuff. I can't even discuss it. In fact, I think I'd rather try to schedule another drs appt than deal with it.

How every body?

Or not! Haha.

<<bridge story for another day>>

On my big genealogy printout project, I finished all the great grandparents now and am working on the 2x. I wasn't sure if I'd do that but I kind of have a system now and even though it's time consuming, it's not boring because I am reading and re reading things I've forgotten, etc. and we do actually have quite a bit of info on most of them. But when this phase is done I will definitely go back into writing/reporting mode in order to share with people. I've made some videos which is a fun process for me, and is easily shareable. I would like to also be able to send some pdf "booklets" out but I really need to replace my computer to do that because I would want to design it and make it look pretty.

Well, still "defending my floor space" and am gradually working up to cleaning out under the bed. One day I will just up and do it and be done with it.

Oh sad face. I had such a good lil post going and then my iPad died.

I did copy the toad typo though. I love toads so why not.

I think I was saying I wish you guys could see my expressions while I'm reading through posts... the chuckling, the "oh gurl I been there"s, the gasps, the empathizing, and the full on guffaws!

I don't know if I ever mentioned this but in this ww board I used to belong to, one woman became convinced I was Jen Lancaster. I would wave it off like no, I wish... she's doing pretty well now, etc. but she really didn't believe me until we all finally got together IRL for a retreat.

Lila, I do "speed rounds" too. I aim for 15 minute chunks and if it's something particularly gruesome like going through medical paperwork or sifting through mixed paperwork and garbage... I will do shorter times. I feel like when I do it it builds momentum and I end up doing a few hours worth done that I probably wouldn't have otherwise. Sometimes I set a timer, and free form scurry around doing rando things that need to get done. Might be humming flight of the bumblebees. Maybe.

The family invited themselves over Sunday for dinner. They are going to force me into this new phase of life like it

Hi all,

Much for me to catch up on! I will share a couple big deal accomplishments:

1) did a quick turn around on getting a neck X-ray for my son.

2) scheduled his neuro appt.

3) scheduled an eye exam for myself and am going there this am.

Much anxiety right now due to upcoming school meetings and medical stuff...

Decided the other day I really need to start journaling again also. Was that sub c or cm? And then once I got to thinking of that decided it's time for a new vision board. I used to be way into it and even started doing small workshops. I can't tell you exactly what happened but I've been totally disconnected from that practice for several years I think.

More on that later. I'm going to double back and read up!

Shoring you up, SubC. Even though we aren't having true conversations Fiona, I find each person's posts to be very helpful. I'm glad your husband cleared out the garage. I know this is upsetting. Hang in there.

Good morning!

Lately it seems we all have such different schedules we end up talking to ourselves. Ah well, someone will always be along..

I went to the studio last night.
Dh emptied the entire garage in two hours.
Some stuff is in my pottery studio, some stuff is in the animal barn, some stuff is on the front porch, some stuff is in the yard.. The back of the truck is completely full and the truck is parked in the studio/shop barn (as usual)

I think I have adrenal fatigue. I feel nothing about any of this.

I just want to make it to Friday so I can spend my weekend catching up.

Dh and I have a concert to go to on Saturday night - in person, masks and proof of vaccination required. I am still stressed about it. So I guess maybe I don't have adrenal fatigue, it's just that the stuff is too low on my list.

None of the stuff is sentimental, and Dh keeps hiring people to do big jobs around here (I think he wants to get all the major work taken care of as part of his retirement plan) so I'm just thinking "ok, I know how to use Amazon prime if he gets rid of/wrecks stuff I need." And "worst case - we generate five or six cans of garbage that could have been avoided."

I have become more willing to spend money these days. Possibly because I feel like I have less time and energy to throw at things, but it is carrying over into nonessentials. My definition of non-essentials is broad. There are holes in both my wheelbarrow and my barn coat. My most recent "nonessential" was a high quality shovel for transplanting trees. Almost a month ago, I bought three pottery tools on sale for a total of $18. Big splurge! I also ordered a book. Everything else I have bought recently is food or feed. We have been getting less take out and still not going out to eat.

Also, some of the stuff belongs to school, and I am about ready to take it back and throw it in the storage closet dirty. (It came home because school doesn't have a hose) I still love my job - as in, what I do in my classroom, but some stuff has happened the last few weeks that has changed my attitude toward my administration from grateful to cynical. And I'm honestly not sure it's fixable.

Anyway, don't make decisions at high points or low points..

The cross quarter was Saturday. We are now in the dark half of the year.

Bean is sleeping.

I arranged to drop him off at home today so I can take sone pottery down for my class and spend my evening glazing.

Dh walked in a few minutes ago and said "don't panic ok?" I said "ok, why am I not panicking?"

My garage floor is getting done tomorrow.

Good morning.

Tatoulia, I had envisioned your garage as something smaller. I'm surprised you could store bins in a large public garage.

You have been doing a good job looking after mom this weekend!

I have definitely saved too many stuffed animals, but I can't pare them down yet. Unfortunately Bean only likes a very few. He doesn't like stuffed animals in general. He lives real animals though. And animal books.

Lila, changing your diet is really hard. Like the hoarding, it's easiest to start at the point of getting the stuff, but tgat can be super hard with food if you live with other people. What are some fruits and vegetables you like?

Doing something every time you go into your room is great! Also, it is exercise. If you are working on your path, you are moving, you are bending, you are not sitting. Just keep reminding yourself to try to move more for a start.

Which reminds me - road, check the laundry

I need to clean up mil's sewing stuff. DD1 asked her to make a Santa suit for Bean while she was here, which was lovely, because it kept her busy at the sewing machine the whole time and she was able to feel like she was being helpful and useful without making my life (much) harder. (Also, DD is pretty happy about the Santa suit.) Her lack of concern about pins was a little stressful, but it went ok.

One issue is that the girls moved a table in here for her to work on, and I'm not sure Dh can help me pick it up to move it back.

I'm going to take Bean home and work at the pottery studio this evening. I have some things that have to be dropped off to be fired. As usual, got nothing to speak of done on lesson plans this weekend. I did rip out the entirety of a small knit and crochet project I had started. Which is not actually progress.

Lila you are doing great! I love getting rid of stuff! Glad to see you pushing through! Hello SubC!

Lila I live in Boston Proper. Right in the city. I park in a public garage about six blocks from my house. I have a designated parking spot. I'm right by the stairs. It's public in the sense that you can rent monthly but not by the day. I think in winter storms they used to open it up but I do not use my car daily or even weekly so I can't remember how that worked. I used to drive my car several times a week for work. I now have zero travel for work. As soon as I took this job, I got rid of my expensive car and got a Toyota. In the last 12 years I've put only 30,000 miles on it. And I let my friends drive it so I'm not even responsible for all of those miles.

Someone keeps breaking the garage doors. I haven't seen any break ins to the cars. I think people break the doors so they can park for free.

I did more laundry tonight after doing mom's groceries. I have to go fold them and off to bed.

I'm tired too, SubC.

Lila, Tillie wasn't feeling well and stopped posting. I got in touch with Cory. He tried emailing her, with no luck. We miss her terribly.

Good job Lila!

Our company leaves in the morning - probably after I head out to get Bean. He was here most of the weekend so that was nice.

I do not love my inlaws. I wrote more, but this is a public forum and if I regret it I can't edit.

Fil and Dh did some fencing work this afternoon that I really appreciate. It helps me out a lot to have it done.

Last night I was so exhausted I went to bed at 7:35. Then I slept until new 7:30.

oh... still no replies today? I hope to hear from you guys!

Today has been rough but I got a bit more done, 5 minutes at a time. Every time I went in my bedroom I spent 5 minutes and did SOMETHING. I sorted a tiny pile, threw half of it away and found my dog's new tag I was looking for. I made a path to the dressers and looked through them for things to donate. I donated a couple of pillowcases and a tee shirt that is new but I don't like the logo (was free). I took out 2 empty boxes to the trash. I folded a few towels and donated one that has bleach stains (they repurpose these). I had a digital scale sitting on the floor that I don't like. I have a regular analog scale in the bathroom that I think is more accurate, so I donated the digital one. I also went through some plastic drawers and donated a new notebook, a little speaker and some earphones. A tablet cover, a few other little things. I had my son take the big box of donations to my car. I have a small box almost ready to be put in the car. Oh, I also donated a purse I liked but never use anymore.

I guess I did more than I thought. I think before that box goes out to my car I will look over my bookshelf one more time and see what needs to go. Then I can put the keep books onto the shelf.

Whew.

And now for the update on my decluttering. I did go through the box of my son's special things from childhood. I threw away about 2/3 of it. I wondered why I kept some of that stuff! I saved 3 or 4 precious things... cards he made for me when he was small, etc. I have a short stack to mail to him, mostly things like the first time he wrote his name, a couple cute drawings and essays from when he was little, and his report cards and a few medical papers. I did not look through the report cards but am going to do that before I mail them, so he only gets a few and not 20! I also got out all the school class photos of his, school pics, family pics etc and put them together with the special papers. Of course I saved one from each grade for myself. He has not given me an address yet, so I will text him again today and if not I will send to his dad.

The rest of the week I did no decluttering. I was too busy. Today I went in my bedroom and was frustrated I still cannot walk to the windows or dressers, so a path is my next goal. I had 2 cardboard boxes on the floor with breakable things (you know, because of my kid). I took everything from one box and put it into a tub (threw out 2 items and donated 3 plates). I am going to add the things from the second box so it is all in one bin, and shove it into the corner for someday when my kid is not breaking things. Then can fill the empty boxes with donations. I also took one full bag of trash out, and I finally folded up the Queen comforter that I could not decide what to do with, and put it in an empty bin downstairs. If anyone needs it, it is there, out of my room. If no one uses it this winter I will probably donate it then.

I feel so paralyzed when I go into my room and try to continue making the path, but I am forcing myself to do SOMETHING every time I go in there, even if it is to put one thing away or sort one pile. So off I go to do that again.

What are you all up to today?

SubC, just read your posts and am caught up. I wonder where Road is, and has anyone heard from Tillie? I hope your inlaw visit it going well. I know the relief when people finally leave, even if we love them. I need to be alone sometimes.

Thank you for helping me think about the weight issue. Yes, it is important to me to lose it, because it is affecting my health. One issue also is there is a strong history of heart disease in my family. Dad, grandparents, uncles all died young of heart attacks. And now I have high cholesterol and some other issues. The doctor and the cardiologist told me I have to lose the weight if I want to be healthy. I also have autoimmune issues. So I have switched to a mostly plant based way of eating. But the junk food calls to me. I can hardly stand it. I crave fast food, candy, junky foods. I was raised on those foods because my mother was mentally ill and never cooked. Well, she cooked hot dogs. I love hot dogs but I am avoiding them now. I almost never ate vegetables or fruit as a child. It is a hard habit to break but I am trying. I feel like an addict sometimes.

What worked before was counting calories and exercise. I just don't have it in me to measure everything and count calories anymore, and I have arthritis that makes exercise painful. Excuses... I need to do something. My doctor gave me phentermine pills so I will start taking that tomorrow and see how it goes. He said it is safe as long as it is not combined with other drugs or caffeine. He said he will check my blood pressure etc to be sure I stay healthy on it. He said yes there are minor risks to any medication, but my weight is more likely to kill me than the med, so I am going to try it for short term. Wish me luck. I have about 60 pounds to lose.