I forgot to set my alarm last night.

Probably good because I needed the sleep, but I had plans for the time.

I have another new student coming today. I hope I like her.

Dh and I were talking over breakfast about things we need more of in our lives. I told him my problem was that I couldn't think of anything I'm willing to give up to make time except housework and meals. (And commuting, but not the things I'm commuting to...)

I hoard activities and experiences too..

I went by Bean's house after school yesterday. His Mommy had a meeting and dsil fed me dinner. I got Bean to eat his broccoli, so it was a big win.

Ok, off to do things and be social today.

Took 7 pieces of scrap fence to school to give another teacher for a project.

Also took half a dozen dried out markers to drop in the marker recycling collection.

A student gave me a pretty live flower hair comb.

Brought home a lot of new pots not sure how many will stay - update later.

Tomorrow I have lunch with one age inappropriate friend and dinner with another. (Both over 18 and under 21.)

Need to get to bed!

I was thinking the box just to clear and decide - whatever you didn't put back you could carry to where it goes and then have the empty box for the next space - by moving it, you would have to really see it.

I'm glad you have your friend to help.

Hi SubC! Good work on getting through the papers and magazines!

It is surface decorations. I'm loathe to put in a box because then I have a box full of stuff. And I can't allow that. I am going to put things away. And then decide what I want to come back. And if there's not room to put away, then things will have to move on to goodwill.

My friend is coming for dinner Friday night. She will help. She loves going through my stuff. Loves the closets. Loves the drawers. She's magical.

Abdomen is definitely iffy today. Tea for me. If need be, I'll buy crackers but I hate the sodium. Salt isn't my thing. I can also have a banana or rice.

Good morning!

Tatoulia, how are you this morning?

Lila, how is your leg?

I did the chores last night, but no pottery, and left the lesson plans for this morning. I am tired this morning. I did get out to the studio and check on the pots that were drying. I forgot to take something out though. I am trying.

Yesterday was actually a very productive day. Today I will probably just coast. I have class again tonight.

I have upped my caffeine too much again. I know it's a crutch, but I can't seem to shake it.

I counted the old magazines. There are 21. Going back to 2020.

Dh says he will leave sometime this weekend for work, depending on flight options. He doesn't know how long he will be gone. Mornings will be easier because I won't need to be quiet, but evenings will be a struggle. And I will miss him.

So I have been pulling one at a time off the stack and putting it in the bathroom. it was previously more than 3 years.

The new ones I read tonight instead of surfing online and they are all in the recycling!

Take care of yourself! You are very important. We don't want you back in the hospital.

Are the decorations on surfaces or walls? Can you grab a box or basket and clear off the surfaces one at a time and then judiciously put back?

Hi SubC! Good getting those things out of the house!

I was glad to be at the office today. My abdomen is painful. I need to be careful here. I ate crackers for lunch and then just had some tuna. I'll see how this sits.

I think I'll do a load of delicates then shower and call it a night. I don't know if mom's new meds start tonight. Her meds are locked in her room and the aides give her the meds each night. I don't want to call attention to it, either.

So my goal is to get rid of the clutter in the living room. I don't see it, so it's hard for me. It isn't clutter like piles of stuff, it's just decorative stuff that needs to take a holiday and give me some room to breathe.

SubC what do you think you should do with the three years worth of local papers. Could you decide to let them go? I'm in the same boat, sometimes, and ultimately I find letting them go is the easiest. Let me know if you want any encouragement. Also let me know if you want me to leave it be!

I have a terrible headache in addition to the abdomen pain. I'm afraid I'll have to figure things out. All was going so well but obviously I ate too much last night.

I have a list of things to do tomorrow and later this week. I'll report back.

Winding down.

Laundry from this morning has finished in the dryer.

Some scrap fence is loaded in the truck to donate to another teacher for a project at school.

I turned in my old iPad for a $65 "trade in" refund and dropped two older damaged models for recycling at the same time.

Stopped at the feed store on the way home (have not unloaded the feed.)

Chores, pottery, and lesson plans left to do and once again out of steam.

I tossed three magazines into the recycling right before I left this morning. Three more arrived in the mail today. They are not subscriptions, they are local publications with events and articles. I always check the events and then keep them too long thinking I will read the articles. I currently have a three year stack.

Isn't it a white rabbit?

CM, where are you?!

I did get both an unexpected short flash of sun and a surprise visit from a friend in the parking lot when I showed up today, so I'm still doing ok.

I even remembered my lunch! (It's usually 50/50 on that one.)

I started the dishwasher and a load of wash before I left home, and completely loaded my car with stuff to not bring back.

I stopped at the bank - where they gave me a piece of Halloween candy, dropped 5 grocery bags of recycling, tossedthetwofeed bags with trash in them into the school dumpster, and carried two trips worth of equipment and supplies up to my room. Don't worry, I am not hoarding my room back up.

An hour of sun sounds so miserable, SubC. I am proud of how much you accomplish. This time of year is like swimming in jello. It's so hard.

November 1st. My goal is to declutter the living room. I can do it and I will be happy.

In honor of CM, rabbit rabbit rabbit. I'm not sure if the rule is to say rabbit two times or three.

Having my tea. It's dark out here. Not good. Dreading the time change.

Good morning.

I am up. I have eaten breakfast and taken my vitamin. I made Dh breakfast. I put my breakfast dishes and some of the backlog in the dishwasher. So far, progress.

My counter is a drift again. That is just going to be a hot spot for a while.

Only an hour of sun in the forecast.

Obviously I need to do my chores and go to work. The top urgent and important task is to get my lesson plans done before that! The second one is to remember to buy feed on the way home.

I have other things on my list for the day, but if I do those, it will be ok.

Planting garlic stayed on my urgent and important list for a month. Clearly it was not that important. I didn't do it. So I won't grow garlic this year. I am a little sad and disappointed in myself, but there will be time for garlic next year when I have things more under control. I have to believe I will have things more under control.

I am also looking forward to a day when the top urgent/important thing on my list is a thing that could just as well be done "tomorrow."

Hi tatoulia,

I hope the meds help.

Road, did your son go out to trick or treat?

Apparently Bean warmed up to the idea and loved it. People gave him chocolate! He discovered Kit Kats! He was a handyman with mama's hard hat, safety glasses, a canvas work bag with his toy tools, his carhartts, an orange shirt, and boots. His best friend was a green crayon, and their other buddy was a robot. So adorable!

He did enjoy the zoo jeep today.

I got out to the studio. Just for a few minutes. I trimmed one piece and brought back an item for the donate pile. It's progress.

I told Dh I am dying in the dark and he said "this is the first day you have felt like this. You have been doing really really well this year, and doing all kinds of things." So that's good I guess.

Second load of laundry is in the dryer. I cut Dh hair tonight. I am doing ok.

Hello, All!

Road, I'm so glad your son had a nice weekend!

SubC, we have very mild weather here and I can hear all the trick or treaters outside. Some years, I've handed out candy. Not this year.

Mom's dr called and he's going to be adding some meds to help with the dementia. I tried to tell her about that tonight.

I have my recycling out and kitty has a clean litter box. I need to shower and go to bed. I'm going into the office tmr.

I still feel like my house is cluttered. I'll work on it. I want it to be cute for Christmas.

The dark is killing me.

Overcast all day again today. At least I had Bean.

We picked up soil for the lemon tree - which is still in the truck, which went to the courthouse with Dh for early voting because it looks like he will be gone next week.

I unloaded, loaded, and ran the dishwasher. Did one load of laundry - Bean enjoyed putting the wet things in the dryer.

Did morning chores. Too early for evening.

No lesson plans yet. Trying to force myself out to the studio. No creative energy. It's not even six. I want to have a glass of wine for dinner and go to bed.

Also, my car has new tires and ball joints and I would really like to stop spending money. My paycheck has been delayed 24 hours by a bookkeeping error. 2/3 of it will go to the car. I apparently could not live on my paycheck. Although the government says My income is right at the poverty line for a family of 4.

And now it is pouring rain, so I want to go outside even less. Poor trick or treaters!

Happy Halloween!

My son is proudly manning his post handing out candy to trick or treaters. I wonder if this will be the year he stops going out.

I had an episode again of my mystery pressure/ chest pain. This time I took 2 gasx some pepto and a muscle relaxant Right away and so far it's holding steady at "feeling bloated and a little yuck". MUST go to the gastro and figure this out.

Over and out,

Good morning!
Happy Halloween!🎃

Nice job on the fridge and clothes Road!
What are you doing with the notices when you take them down? (Just checking)

It sounds like your son had a great weekend! And good for you hiking!

Keeping up with things is so exhausting! Why can't they just STAY clean? - lol.

Dh may have to go out of state on short notice - possibly today, so I need to up my laundry game.

My friend and I have narrowed our plans down to Thursday or Friday - I'm waiting to hear back from her.

Meanwhile, todays goals:
Get out in the studio
Chores
Laundry
Dishes/counter
Bean (I have to give him back early so he can go trick or treating tonight)
Lesson plans
Potting soil for the lemon tree

Very reasonable, right?

Tatoulia & CM, thinking of you both! 💓💓

Hi everyone,

We had a busy social weekend but i managed to do some maintenance and "Sunday Resetting." I did some laundry a few days ago but baskets were piling up in my room so I got those emptied out and clothes folded and put away. Ive now gone through all my & my sons underwear, socks, and tee shirts. I counted and I have about 25 tee shirts in the drawer plus whatever is floating around. I have 25-30 regular pairs of underwear and socks. I have a drawer of odd socks too (like heavier winter ones). But suffice it to say I am well stocked in my day to day clothing but nothing ridiculous in terms of quantity and all the really stained, hated or holey stuff is gone. All clothes are either in the dresser, closet or laundry. Except for stuff that is lost in the hoard somewhere but I will deal with that stuff in 27 months when I get to it. Lol.

I also cleaned out the veggie drawers today & cooked a bit. I checked my old posts and cleaned those out a month ago. Then I did some maintenance two weeks ago and today they really needed cleaning again. This is probably a maintainable schedule. Plus, the more deep cleaning I check off the list the more time it will free so even though I will keep having more to maintain, there will be more time. I hope. I think focusing on some of this basic housekeeping skills is a more logical way to start (for those of us who have issues cleaning that contributes to our hoarding issues.) if we can't maintain a cleared, cleaned space, how will we maintain hoarded areas that are freshly cleared. This has been enough of a challenge for me as it is. I'm glad I'm doing this.

Oh, I also took down two events that passed for my son off the new magnetic strips. Again this is a weird ocd thing I guess. I want to save all the evidence of past events I guess so I won't forget they happened.

In personal updates, my son had a costume party Friday. He went as a bottle of ranch. Not surprisingly, he's so round, the one size costume was so tight he could hardly sit down in it. He tried to make friends with a piece of pizza, a hot dog, and a mustard. 😄 sat am we went to breakfast then went to explore a prehistoric mound site near our house. I actually managed to get in 5000 steps (which is still a big achievement for me) AND I did not wet my pants. Well I set my pants 4 other times this weekend but thankfully not out in public on that hike! 😄 then my son had his acting class performance. Today we went and got donuts and then another walk on the river. Lots of great photos everywhere - leaves are still hanging on. Then the guys went to my BILs house and then when they came back I took my son to a bday party. So fun weekend for the kid. So nice to have a busy social life again post (not really) pandemic.

As for friendships, I have had years of crappy and mediocre friendships. I've had years of plenty. Right now I'm still pushing myself a bit to get back out there but the friends I have are really quality friendships. I feel lucky. The stuff that stresses me is my health, the hoard, marital stuff (getting slightly better) and sibling tensions. and dealing with the school! 😖🫣

Good evening.

I hope everybody had a good day!

I spent a lot of time in the studio again. I worked on some pieces - not the ones I actually most need to get done, but the ones I most felt like doing, which I actually think is more important right now.

I wedged some more clay - not a lot, but a little, and finished or tossed into the reclaim bucket half a dozen started pieces - things I had shelved for a long time.

My biggest job was disassembling the big pile of window boxes I brought home from school. I put the 2x4 pieces in my animal barn (part of them are destined to become a new compost bin) and the screws on Dh workbench. The liners and crummy bases went into feed bags for a trip to the school dumpster. I have 1.5 feedbags of trash - mostly the remains of those window boxes. Since the school was going to throw them out, I don't feel bad using the dumpster - I saved them space and weight. Anyway, those are not stacked in my studio crowding my pottery wheel anymore.

I swept part of the floor too. And I brought in a toy jeep with a zoo wagon and washed it so Bean can drive his animals around in it tomorrow.

And I did a load of laundry.

Good (late) morning.

Was up until nearly midnight last night.

Lila, I am glad you found your paper! And good for you moving the clothes and xh things. Way to reclaim your bin!

I spent most of the day in the studio yesterday, but I think I spent half my time looking for things. It has become so disorganized, and a bit of a catchall storage - mostly for things Dh finds and decides are mine (apparently scrap wood I think I might want to use can't be in the scrap wood bin unless Dh also thinks he might want to use it.)

I did find some things that can go to school and never come back.

I also found some pictures on my ipad of my basement in 2019. I am sad because it looked much better than it does now. But, I have decided - my upstairs is not a storage area. My studio is not a storage area. My basement is a storage area. By the end of 2023, I want to have all the stored things in the basement (exceptions to be made for neatly organized, themed closets or cupboards upstairs as I have bedroom closets in what are now guest rooms) the basement does not have to be cleared out or organized, I just want everything to fit. Improving it can be 2024.

So, I am going to start by removing all the "not pottery studio" things from my studio area.

I will go out there every day.
I will not leave without making some improvement, no matter how small. Even if I just wash a brush and put it in the brush jar. (There are dirty brushes on the floor, because at some point I was sitting on the floor glazing because my work table and chair were piled full, and then I left, thinking I would come back, and I didn't come back..)

Keep me accountable!

I found the paper!!!

It took me all day yesterday, digging through every pile it could be in! And where was it? It was on the kitchen table, under some empty grocery bags. Why?? But I was so ecstatic to find it so I could do the thing I was supposed to do with the info a long time ago! Whew.

And now... there is another paper missing. A diagram I need for work that I last saw a year ago. So that one, I was looking as I went looking for the other paper. But it was not any of those more "recent piles" of papers. I have searched exhaustingly for the diagram. I even emptied out a filing cabinet today looking for it. There is one pile left in my bedroom that it could be in... oh, and probably a tub, maybe a box. Would it be easier to try and re-draw the diagram? Maybe, but not as accurate. But if I can't find it tonight I will draw it.

Today I also:
- loaded and ran the dishwasher
- dug around to find a half empty plastic bin, with some of ex's things in it, put his things in his room and brought the empty tub upstairs.
- sorted many items from my closet that are too small and put them into that tub. It will go downstairs. If I lost 15 pounds most of it would fit.

Now I really need to hang up the clothes piled on the rocking chair, since I have space and hangers in my closet now. I probably tubbed 20+ items so I should be able to hang up most of my things.

I've mentioned I wear the same 5 or so things all the time, but now maybe I can mix it up. I have a couple of cardigan sweaters so could wear many combinations of colored shirts under those. I have to get up and speak tomorrow so I am very glad I got the clothes sorted.

How are the rest of you doing?

Just came back and reread that.

Lila, clearly that should say "paper" not "check" below..

Tired brain.

Hey CM! In your case I'd prefer an improvement over "business as usual." You need some rainbows and butterflies for a change! Hoping for the best.

Hi Lila! I really, really, really hope you find the check.

I am bad at friends. I am worse at age appropriate friends. The one I emailed this morning is 19. The one who just emailed me and we are trying to make dinner plans next week is 20. As in, my friends are younger than my children.

In college my two best friends were guys - one was my age and the other was 12 years older. The closest things I have to girlfriends my age are two women at work whom I really like and who seem to like me back, but NEVER have time to do anything outside of school - one of them I had dinner with in a group once. That's it for 11 years. If I quit I would probably never see them again. And one "mom friend" who has outlasted our kids growing up - mostly because our husbands are practically brothers. I like her a lot, but if I could only hang out with one of them, I'd pick him.

I have absolutely no idea how to make friends.

Good school day today. The rabbit behaved.

Good morning. Well slightly after lunchtime. CM, I hope your situation goes well and favorably. Thank you for checking in!

SubC, good plan on the friend-building. Friends are important.

This morning I loaded the dishwasher and put a few things away. I search the whole (@#$*%#$# bedroom for that darned paper. I even took the clothing off the rocking chair and table one by one, to see if it was in there somewhere or under it all - no luck. I did fold 2 items that are too small. Still need the tub.

That paper!!! I have to find it!! So I am going to sort through all the papers on my kitchen table, the tub of papers next to me (although I think I already did sort those) and just look everywhere I can to find it I don't know where it could be and I am so frustrated. I can't work on anything else til I find that paper or decide it is really gone. I even dug through the trash bag in my room looking for it.

I'm sorry I poofed again... it's complicated. Waiting to hear about something that came up unexpectedly and I pray that the outcome will be favorable. Won't know for a few weeks. I'll lurk and keep up with you all in the meantime. Hopefully it'll all be okay and back to business as usual. Best to all.

Good morning!

Road, you have to actually take the rest of the pile somewhere before your son unpacks it, ok?

I'm glad you are making progress on your organization!

Lila, I didn't realize how bad the leg was - definitely do the PT! You don't have time not to!

I believe you can get the too small things out of your room.

My top urgent/important today is school, so I need to just focus on that for the next 9.5 hours. Then I'd like to work on pottery this evening and get to bed early, but I know I will come home tired, snack, Dh will ask if I want to watch a movie, I'll say yes, we'll open some wine, and I'll stay up too late.. He is an enabler.

He also wants to invite some friends over on Sunday. I am trying not to die about the condition of the farm. Not just the house - everything!

I decided I need to do something about the lack of friends situation. I am going to try to reach out to a friend or potential friend every day. This morning I had an email from a newish friend who is not too far away physically, so I already did my thing for today by replying and also inviting her to hang out at a mutually workable time and place.

Ok, gotta hit the school thing.

Oh - brought home a retired poster from school yesterday. Probably a bad choice. Can't let it go yet.

hi Road! I tripped and fell and hurt my leg. It was black and blue top to bottom. They say now I need PT. Ugh, I don't have time to keep getting injured and sick.

Hi SubC, sounds like fun at school! I did go look at clothes on amazon again but I did not buy anything. I do plan to shop my piles tomorrow.

I have been doing this thing: I have major piles of clothes on the rocking chair and side table. I go in there and move them to the bed. sort them into piles. then at bedtime I put them back in piles on the rocking chair and end table. I have been doing this for WEEKS and it is so dumb it is making me mad! But there is so much junk I can't get to the closet or drawers. I am also not ready to get rid of any more clothes. So, I will ask Son to get me a plastic bin, and tomorrow I will bin anything that is too small, and put it downstairs in a corner somewhere. That's my 'for now' solution and I hope I can do it.

I did not find that stupid paper yet tonight, but I did sort a couple of piles looking for it, and threw some things away. It's late so I don't think I will look much further. I'm going to bed soon.

Kind of ran around a lot today. Went for a long drive with the Ps to look at leaves. It's really amazing. We are just slightly past the peak but should still be really pretty for another week.

Yesterday (?) went through all my socks and sons socks and underwear. The other day I also went through all his shirts and sweatshirts trying to get rid of the stuff that is too small. I ended up chucking a few things and piling up a tall basket of clothes to get rid of. He got at it and pulled a couple things out and then my husband did too. So today I bought some new larger underwear for him and some extra long undershirts (trying to keep his belly and butt crack covered up). Omg it's a major challenge. Let me tell you. Yesterday I also set up some new magnet strips I bought in lieu of a bulletin board by my bedroom door. Had to trouble shoot the command strip things but I think it's holding now. So that's progress. There's still laundry to do but not sure what's on the agenda for tomorrow.

Lila, I missed what was up with your leg - cellulitis? DVT??

Gotta. Help the young dude get ready for bed. Gotta run but I will catch u ptomorrow.

Lila!

I am sorry things are hard, but so good to hear from you!

"Dear kettle,
The Oreos are not your friends.
Love,
The pot"

It's like I can only make so many good choices in a day and then I come home and encounter food...

Don't buy clothes. Go shop your piles!

I hope you find your paper.

I am almost ready for school tomorrow as far as planning, but I will have a lot to load in the truck. And I have papers to check.

Today was fancy dress day at school (spirit week) I wore one of my daughter's old brides maid dresses over my school t-shirt and jeans. The kids loved it. Also a tiara.

Tomorrow is Halloween costume day, but I am taking my rabbit in to visit, so I might skip that.

hello!

- insert mental picture of me sitting surrounded by candy wrappers and oreo crumbs, staring into space with a glazed over look

Here I am. I have tomorrow off so will come back and catch up on posts then. My leg is still very painful. My separation is filed but not complete (I have more papers to fill out and file). My house is a wreck, I am overwhelmed with how many things I need to do. I'm hoping to catch up on the most important things tomorrow.

Today I did load and run the dishwasher and wash out the gross sink. Then worked. I could be doing something now but am decompressing instead.

I think the one thing I will try to do this evening is find that darned piece of paper with all the important information I was given, and lost. I am 99% sure it is in my room, in a pile. It could be in the guest room, in the old stash n dash box from weeks ago. If I don't find that paper it is going to be super embarrassing. So, I will focus on just finding that. Everything else can wait til tomorrow.

I keep wanting to buy clothes. I must have spent 4 hours just looking at clothes on Amazon this week. I guess it is a distraction. In fact I feel very compelled to go look for clothes on Amazon right now! I have not bought anything. I really need to spend that time sorting the clothes I have, in piles, and put away things that are too tight so I have on hand things I can wear, easily.

I am making a goal and trying to convince myself to do it: No-spend November, AND lose 15 pounds in November. I think I can do it as I have a lot of water weight from eating junk and would probably drop 5-7 pounds in the first 3 days just from that.

Back to the oreos.