Tillie, a wise and gentle reminder. Thank you.

Roxie, congrats on getting all that stuff done!

If you can't do the central air please do get a room ac unit. As we get older we do less well in the heat and humidity. In any case be sure and drink plenty of water.

About the people featured on "HOARDERS".
The hoarders themselves really are not ready to declutter but have been pushed into doing it by family members or the city inspectors or child/adult welfare, etc.
They get a little bit of therapy before the filming begins but no where near enough to make them want to change.
Being forced against their will makes them act the way they do.
And it is a fast clean out, has to be to meet the deadlines set by the city or child/adult welfare.

Here, we can go slow enough to allow you to accept the changes in your homes and thinking.
And if or when you are ready, a big fast clean out is something that you are ready to do and do it of your own free will.

Remember, the TV hoarders are usually forced against their will, can't afford to hire a clean up crew and agree to be on the show in order to keep their homes, children or family members, avoid jail time and heavy fines.

(((hugs)))

AnneL: there were a couple of things I was looking for during the clean out. We never found my newer camera (still haven't). But one of the guys found my photo album from my high school years. I was so thrilled! I went to hs overseas, so the pics are irreplaceable. It's beat up but I want to share it when I go to a reunion in October in Albuquerque. The guy that found it for me had a big, proud smile on his face when he showed it to me. 😀

I found the workers respectful of everything. They will make some mistakes and that is normal. They threw out all my saved grocery bags, which I use to bag books I'm donating. I was not happy, but was it a life issue? No, I had more bags within a week, so no big deal.

I found my great grandmother's writing desk was damaged due to neglect by me. The drawer was beyond repair. I said toss the desk but they kept the desk for me and tossed the drawer. If I leave the drop down door down you don't see the drawer.

They found a phone that worked and swapped out my landline phone. Now I have a working phone I can actually hear from another room. Big difference!

Making a small list of things you hope to find is okay to give them. But they may not find the items. So be prepared to be accepting and gracious. They didn't make our messes or lose our things, right?

Between now and their arrival to work, keep working toward decluttering and maybe you'll find some of those things.

I used to have a mental battle with making myself go to the gym and work out (we are talking years ago now). I'd joined a club across the street from my job. I'd go at lunch hour. Well, I made a rule for myself to go every workday so I had no "out." Then on the days when I really wanted to bail, I'd make a deal with myself that I just had to go to the club and change clothes, wasn't required to work out. Of course, I found that once I was already there with changed clothes, working out was no big deal. I did that for years.

Now with CFS I cannot work out at all. I miss the strong and toned body I had back then.

There are ways around our brains. I know from working out that our brains and bodies can lie to us about what we can and cannot do.

Maybe you can use these type tactics in your own circumstances? You don't want to declutter today, too tired, too whatever. Make a deal with your brain that you will do X for X minutes and then you may quit if you wish.

Yesterday I rounded up two full bags of garbage and took them to the garbage bin (rather than dropping them "for now" in the kitchen--kitchen door leads to the outdoor garbage bin). I also put all those washed dishes away. I also brushed my teeth.

Now this last doesn't sound like much but for me IT IS. I go to the dentist at least twice a year but am terrible about daily personal grooming. I'm working on it.

I have a small calendar by my computer. Each day I put a slash through the date when I take my daily meds. Now I've decided I'll put a second slash (making an X) when I also brush my teeth. That way I'll have a visual reminder so maybe I'll do better. Hope so. On a positive note, I do floss a lot since food gets stuck. I know brushing and flossing is supposed to be a daily thing. My aim for now is brushing at least once a day.

Today so far I actually walked to the end of the driveway and picked up the Sunday newspaper. I've skipped that for two weeks, believe it or not. And I actually went a little further to the mailbox and emptied that crammed thing. Yeesh. So now I have a pile of mail to sort, and something to read (newspaper) in the bathroom. I recycle newspaper so I have grocery bags in the bathroom into which newspaper goes after I read it.

It is getting warmer here and I really need to do something about getting some air conditioning. Over a year ago I had the best rated local HVAC company come and quote me $6000 for new central air. But they refused to work in my house until it was cleaned up. It was a record hot summer. Thank God I had a small ac free standing unit I borrowed from a friend. I put it on the floor and slept directly in front of it on the floor. That was the only way to stay cool enough. I was having bouts of dizziness, staggering and in two cases brief blackouts.

Yes, I understand why they didn't want to work here. Yet I resent it as well. What if it were their mom? Would one or two days of unpleasant work conditions be too much to ask? Grump grump.

ALSO, I don't HAVE $6000. When I joined Angie's List on the internet, I started researching companies. I have to contact them. I just have to. The house is sufficiently tolerable now. I am just afraid the quotes will be equally intimidating.

Another option might be getting two room ac's installed for now. Much less expensive, not ideal, but manageable. I can no longer do things like install my own ac unit, so I'd have to pay someone to do it. I hate this.

Okay ending on a more positive note: it is still cool enough that I'm not having those dizzy or fainting bouts and I can accomplish other chores. I'm grateful for that!

Roxie,

Diane is right, your words of what you are going through mentally, physically and emotionally with your stuff really does help me to realize that I, too, will probably be doing that once the "real" work starts when the crew gets here.

I also watch the Hoarders show and while I feel I'm not as bad as some of those people (I know they pick the most extreme cases for the show probably), I always think that I understand how they feel, sometimes.

My concern is that I'm going to lose something important during the clean up. I'm trying to write things down that I think of that I need to look for while cleaning, but I know there's probably stuff buried under junk that I have long forgotten about that could be important too and that's what worries me.

But I think we are all doing a great job and by sharing our stories here we are all helping each other by seeing what our fellow "comrades in arms" are facing.

Everyone, let's stay strong together, we can do this. It's very intimidating but I know we can overcome it.

I had a down day today, I was supposed to clean, but just couldn't get my mind into it. The plan is to do double the work tomorrow, I hope!

Thank you all for your support.

Roxie, I appreciate your description of what you went through, probably very helpful to annel. Nice you gave examples, helps me realize some of the stuff I think I am keeping, will probably have to go too. Keep up the good work, and information sharing.

AnneL. I watch the hoarder shows on tv and am appalled by how some of the hoarders act. I made up my mind that I was going to be open and reasonable and calm about letting things go.

I did balk at purses (let go of two) because I only had six left and they are vintage designer and please me. He didn't push that. I balked at discarding oriental rugs but he showed me how damaged they were by bugs. I let the ruined ones go despite having them for so many years. That was so sad. But I survived.

I have an undersized rocking chair from my mom and had bought a matching straight chair. The straight chair cushion was ruined. I made a bargain that I could keep the rocker and let the other go. Sad, but manageable.

I had a set of mattresses outside on the covered porch that I had planned to use to replace the old ones in my bedroom. But after noting that the "new" ones had been gotten at by mice or something, I let all of them go. ("You were thinking of keeping THOSE?" LOL)

I made up my mind also that I would just "go through" no matter how I felt, physically or emotionally. Part of our problem at hoarders is stuffing feelings. Part of our recovery is going through them to learn they won't kill us and we can get through and move on to better things.

I also remembered to express to each person individually how I appreciated their help and their input. I learned some things about organization, and cleaning, and I got assistance in hanging things (a clock) and lifting things I could not move.

Just trying to reassure you that it will be FINE when your turn comes.

Talk here about what you feel as you go along.

Dianne, AnneL and MayMay, thank you for your words of encouragement.

Yesterday, I managed to bathe, shampoo and put on new clothes. Then I went to the grocery store as my cupboards and fridge were empty and I had 3 inside cats and four outside cats inquiring why they had so little food to eat this morning.

I tried to tide them over by putting out some milk that was expiring in another day or two, and that pleased them all. I don't normally feed milk to cats, but it's a good way not to waste the last bit of milk by letting it expire undrunk.

I was exhausted by the time I got back, but I put away ALL the groceries and put out new water and food dishes and food for all the cats. They were most pleased and very hungry! I now have food for myself again, too.

I was very happy to have movement again.

Hey Roxie,

Thanks so much for reassuring me about what it cost you, at least I have a general idea of what mine may me as well. I truly appreciate it. Good for you for clearing out your dishes! Cleaning can be so hard sometimes (I guess it's all a mental game though)!
It can be tough pushing through all the mind games going on! I, myself, am trying to stay strong and positive about this whole thing. I feel good that we are finally getting someone to help us, but I find myself dreading the whole ordeal at the same time. But I have encouragement from everyone here, so I feel confident (sometimes!) that I can do this.

Hey MayMay, it's okay that you have a crush on somebody that's super great and nice! Cory is the best, no doubt about it.

Hi Roxie,

It's SO TRUE! I have a HUGE crush on Cory. Not only is he SMOKIN' HOT but he is also a very sweet and caring man. And I find that to be very sexy. 🙂

Hi Anne L,

I'm still super jealous that you got to talk to Cory. 😉

Yay Roxie!!

Smash that logjam!!

Yes! Yesterday I mowed half the property and did all the dishes in the house. Logjam broken!

Nyah nyah, MayMay is crushing on Cory. LOL

AnneL: I am so excited for your news! Don't worry about the evaluator. They are used to us messies and they are nonjudgmental. Mine was very professional but also personable. At the evaluation he walked through the rooms, took a few pictures, and sat down to discuss what I wanted to achieve and what they could provide. He estimated 2-3 days and set a cap at $3500. (As it turned out it was only two days and under $2500.) I decided to go ahead and signed a contract. I did waffle once but sought reassurance from Cory via email and was reassured.

I was disappointed that this crew would not be doing deep cleaning (like washing walls and ceilings) but accepted the info from Cory that not all do. (My crew tried to connect me with someone to do deep cleaning but, being from several hours away, had no luck with it.)

The actual work was scheduled for several weeks later. He kept in touch via email. I've described the actual process on these boards.

Just wanted you to know that you can do this!

I emailed my family and let them know what I was undertaking. Only my oldest brother had ever seen the inside of my house as it was. Anyway, he and my son were very encouraging. They both also sent me money (unsolicited) to help out, which helped immensely! I guess my brother was tired of trying to help clean when he came for visits. We are both decrepit now. hehe

The hard work for me now is both maintenance and advancing the cleanup. It is so, so easy to slide back into the same old ways.

I did get new, working appliances brought in. I still need lots of work for deep cleaning, etc. And I am seriously looking at getting in someone maybe every other week to help with general cleaning and floors.

Keep talking!

Hi MayMay,

No, I won't actually get to meet him in person. He is setting me up with someone in my area I guess. But I felt honored that I even got to hear his voice on the phone, he was so nice and understanding.

Hi Anne L,

OMG! That is SO COOL that you got to talk to Cory on the phone. I'm so JEALOUS! 😉

Is Cory going to help you clean your house? Or is he just helping you find a company near where you live to help you?

Dear Roxie, Dianne & AnneW, and anyone else I missed, I want to thank you all for your encouragement and support, it has meant a lot to me.
I actually got another email from Cory and he apologized for missing my other emails, he provided his cell phone number and I called him the next day. I won't be meeting him directly, but he has arranged for an evaluator to come see what we need done, coming out on June 21st. I'm so scared and yet excited! I so want this done!

Roxie, I am glad you say your place now inspires you, that's what I look forward to when all this over too! The fact that you filled a whole dumpster, wow, great for you! I bet all the junk at my place could fill one as well, if not more! I'm dreading the cost, but I hope and pray it won't cost more than I can arrange to get together, but it will be worth every penny!

Cory is such a nice man and what he has created is so inspirational! He could have been like anybody else and just said, oh, forget those people, they made their messes, let me live like that! But he chose to care and that's a huge thing in my book!

I am so grateful for this website and all the nice people I have found here that showed me that, with encouragement, you can succeed. Thank you all!

AnneL you should be proud of yourself for continuing in your efforts to move forward. I know that for me I had to have outside help because I simply could not do it myself. I'm struggling now with after-work, but the place is so significantly improved that it inspires.

One of the best parts of outside help was that they helped me organize what was left to a large extent. And by their doing so I learned that there IS a place for everything, now that I got rid of so much excess (a dumpster load worth). What a novel concept for me.

I must come up with some extra help with continuing work and with newer work, like cleaning out the jungle that calls itself my yard and driveway. I just have to make the calls. Checking in here, and hearing of all your news, WILL eventually kick me into gear, I just know it.

You are all inspirational.

Anne L, asking for help is a huge step forward. So glad your sister agreed! Congratulations!!

Congratulations, AnneL -- sounds like you worked hard this weekend -- 3 hours is a bunch of time!!! Keep at it 🙂 and so glad you put out another call for assistance! You are on your way 😀

Well, we did good this time. This past weekend on both days we worked for an hour and a half each day to try and clean some of the junk. It's not great, but we're trying. It just feels like we're only moving stuff around though, I don't feel like stuff is getting cleaned. I told my sister we need professional help and she has finally agreed. I have sent another email to see if somebody will help us this time. I hope so because this is too hard to do alone with two women only in the 50's! We have nobody else to help.

AnneL, don't give up. Do 5-15 minutes of cleaning today, no matter what. Send another email, too, and/or reach out to another local cleaning crew from the list. Let us know. You'll get there yet!

Tillie, love to read your posts.

Yesterday I finally DID something so today I hope to do a bit more.

Anne
Please try sending another email to Cory.

Sometimes there is a problem with our internet servers and emails get lost in the clouds.

Just last month that happened to an email that I sent to a friend.

Well, I heard from from Cory actually and he said he needed to get more information from me. He said I could email or call to set up a meeting time to discuss what I wanted. I chose the email since I can't face people just yet, but I never got another response, either from Cory (who I know is very busy) or anyone else. I have since gone back into procrastination mode. We attempted to try to clean on Memorial day weekend but didn't get very far. It's too overwhelming and it's so hard to sort and pack at the same time. I feel frustrated!

Okay, ladies, please update us! I'm anxious to hear more from each of you.

AnneL: If you are a hoarder who has tons and tons of stuff, then it becomes too tempting to "churn" the piles (i.e., move them from one place to another) rather than purge the piles. Have you heard back from whomever you contacted yet?

ann, you still here? Let us hear from you.

Kindred Spirit, hoping to hear more about your adventures in decluttering. I hope you are feeling a bit better?

The past couple of days I've done next to nothing but procrastinate and ignore. With the sun coming out again I hope I'll get up some energy to DO instead of just BE.

Kindred Spirit, you have managed to organize this whole intervention on your behalf in ways that allow you to handle it. I'm impressed, especially that you had "on call" support if you needed it.

Keep us posted with all the steps. Go girl!

The crew is taking pictures and will be leaving me with the pre-post album. I know that will aid me in staying the course plus the support from these boards. Tomorrow will be more clothing clean out with the volunteer team then Tuesday will be back to the paid crew. Initially the paid crew wanted to come in with 2 teams of 2 and I was able to speak up and say that it would be too overwhelming. That was probably the smartest thing for me. I had a good friend on call just in case I needed support. I have not needed to call upon her and it felt good to know it was an option. Everyday I read these boards even if I did not have the energy to post.

Dianne and Kindred Spirit, so glad you posted! I've been thinking of you.

Kindred, it sounds very tiring but I am glad you are holding onto the realization that you can expect some physical and emotional upheaval as you go through the cleanout and cleanup of the hoard. Did you take before and after pictures, or did they? I've kept mine on my computer and hope one day to take "after the after" photos when the placed is more gussied up and painted, etc.

I am now four days into the process and the clearing is a relief and I wish to be able to let go of more. I had a team of two men from an agency listed on our national resources. They have been super. Small glitches...sure however compared to my slow painstaking approach this is easy. On Friday I had a team of two women volunteers who helped to go through clothing. I was connected to them through the paid agency and they have handled the donations. I am not feeling physically great and am not expecting to as this is a struggle of letting go and having faith that life can be better. I will have about three days more of paid help before I hit my budget limit. Hope that will get the rest of the house. It is an amazing positive process.

Hi Anne,

I'm so happy you are on your journey to a clear, fresh life!! 🙂