Hello Dinah :)

Sorry to hear this (((hug)))

I really have no suggestions to help.

To try to understand the hoarding disorder and the way she thinks and why she gets so angry
maybe read "Digging Out".
It also has good ideas for minimizing hazards.

One thing that you MUST do is take the best care of yourself at this very difficult time.
Eat properly, get enough sleep.
Periodically get out and away from that house, even if just to sit in a park for half an hour.

Best wishes

My Mom is a hoarder that has recently been diagnosed with stage IV cancer that is considered terminal. After years of dealing with her hoarding, my way to detach with love was to physically distance myself from her (I live over 2,300 miles away) and check in every other day via phone. I cannot stand to go back to my childhood home, but am now finding myself there after not seeing it in over 10 years. As you can imagine things have not improved in the last 10 years. She needs my help as she goes through chemo, but she is refusing to allow the house to be made safer or cleaners. Both key things when a person is dealing with chemo and isn't feeling well. Once day I'd had enough and just started cleaning. Not only was I most horrible child, but also the most hated. Any suggestions on things to do? I am having a very difficult time dealing with being in such a disaster of a house, but feel I have to deal with it in order to help her. Again, any suggestions on things that could be helpful would be so very appreciated.