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Hoarding Help Message Boards : How to Help a Hoarder : I Think my Husband is a Hoarder, Part 2
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I Think my Husband is a Hoarder, Part 2

spouse of hoarder
Posted: 13 August 2016 - 05:13 PM
There is a connection. I answered your other post. My spouse drinks and it's still a problem which I"ve confronted and done all kinds of things. The two go together. Lucky you that he's done with drinking. Hoarding is huge but having more than one illness that ruins the family life and destroys relationships is worse.

Because he dealt with his addiction he might get it if you talk about how his behaviors are destructive, so I would try to get him to see that since he is not in denial about his other problems, thank goodness.
You have to confront and be compassionate at the same time. I have no idea how to do it right. I've tried everything and now I"m at the point where I'm going to include our daughter and have him face her and talk about it.

I'm very upset and overwhelmed and can't get off this message board to get ready for my vacation. WhAT terrible timing. I told him months ago that we couldn't go on vacation if he hadn't made the house ok for sleep overs. of course he didn't do it.
I'm miserable and trying to stay strong for our little girl.
Posted: 19 February 2016 - 02:41 PM
take a look at the actual Daily Chat thread phase four for a post I just made in regard to posting.
Re husband, I will think about what you have said and make a post or two when I have time, may not be until next week now. In the meantime also look in the daily chat section and scroll down until you find a thread started by "wife" and read through that. The situation which you wish to resolve is and emotionally charged issue for both parties which is painful to consider and maybe not possible to change.
Posted: 17 February 2016 - 12:15 PM
Part 2

This past weekend we went to a ski resort. When we checked into our room I noticed the usual small bottles of shampoo, conditioner, and body lotion in the bathroom. Ten minutes later I went in there and noticed the bottles were gone. I asked my husband about them and he said he put them in his shaving kit. (He already has a bag at home filled with these bottles.) I told him I needed them and removed them from the kit. Yes, I know it is common for people to take those little bottles from hotels, but taking them ten minutes after check-in seems abnormal to me, especially when there is a bag full at home.

This last incident is the tipping point for me and has made me realize (or face the fact) that he has a problem. I should mention that he is a recovering alcoholic who has not had a drink in 16 years. Could there be a connection? This is weighing on me and I am afraid our marriage is suffering because of it. I keep the door to his personal room closed so I do not have to see the mess, but every time I go in the storage room to do the laundry I am confronted with still another mess and I get very angry. I think it is time to confront him. How do I do this without jeopardizing our relationship?
Hoarding Help Message Boards : How to Help a Hoarder : I Think my Husband is a Hoarder, Part 2

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