Oh dear Tatoulia, smelly is a problem.

For me, Febreeze is also a problem. Can you try washing them again? Baking soda maybe?

If you try to sell them online, just be sure to be honest about condition and include clear pictures of any concerns. Do you have any kind of vintage shop you might be able to take them to?

I teach today. I hope it will be a good distraction. I am feeling sick to my stomach with worry for Birdy and his parents. His poor mama was in tears yesterday just over the initial blood draw. She is smarter than I am and has not done the stupid thing I did and googled the bad possibilities.

I also have a ticket to a "local" play tonight that one of my much loved students is performing in. I will get home late, but the little girl asked me to come and our drama teacher told me that it should be quite a good show (it is not children's theatre). My own daughter was in a play with this troupe once - the auditions are fairly competitive. (It's on my way home, so I will plan things to do between work and home to fill the four hour gap. (The first hour of that is usually used up with after school tasks, and there is half an hour of driving)

Got through a bag of stuff here but nothing for donation yet. Mom's stuff came out a little smelly. One dress is so perfect. Silk, peck and peck, brightly colored, with a bubble skirt. So lovely. I think bubble skirt is the right term. Very elegant. Don't know what's next. Everything is hung to dry. I sprayed febreeze to help.

I don't know how to sell these because they are not in pristine condition. So hard to know what to do.

I am praying and sending positive thoughts to your family, SubC. We are here for you.

I just put in a load of my mother's vintage dresses from Peck and Peck. Let's see how they clean up using water and mild soap on the gentle cycle. Then I can see what is worth trying to sell. Two dresses and a crazy pantsuit. Time will tell if dry cleaning was the way to go.

Now I'm going to do a little work and sort through papers.

Sending much love to our little birdie.

I made the blanks, and then right before I got in the shower I got a text from ddil with some additional information from birdy's appointment. It is scary because it is either basically ok - easy to treat, or very bad. She has to schedule testing tomorrow.

I just want all the people I love to be ok and to not have to worry.

Anyway, I did shower. But I didn't build a fire.. and I don't have energy for this clay.

I like your plan for tonight. I think the cola is okay. It's a 20 oz so not very big and I'm only drinking it for the pick me up.

I cannot overemphasize how much it's bothering me to have this much stuff.

I'm thinking of trying to wash a few mom dresses. I am doing a lot of laundry tonight

Good luck and strength Tatoulia! Isn't the cola flat by now?

I lost momentum around lunch time and gave two and a half hours over to eating and reading and watching videos, but I pulled it back together. I have not done all of the things I wanted to do today, but I have done a lot. And I got the calendar stuff together so that I feel less out of control.

Dishes are caught up, laundry is much better, the toys are put away, and I reclaimed the previously cleared section of counter plus another inch. That doesn't sound like much, but the counter is 2.5 feet wide, so that is 30 square inches of clear space. I am going to get there - one inch at a time.

Birdy went to the doctor for his 2 month check up today. He has moved up to 20th%ile for weight and 28th for height, and his motor skills are "advanced". (Brag, brag)

I never made a fire because it had gotten warm and I had moved outside by the time I got that far, but I brought in new fire wood.

I think I am going to go out to the studio, make some quick little pig blanks to work on in the house, shower, get in my Jammie's and start the fire. I've got about an hour and a half before Dh gets home.

Happy Leap Day!

The cold and wind blew in here starting yesterday, CM. Great news on the baby's development, SubC

I need to get rid of stuff. It feels urgent. I have so much mom stuff still here. I hung her etching, finally, today. I have my bag of stuff to sell. I will have a car on Sunday so I need to make some bags to go to goodwill. Also, sister comes next week so the clutter needs to go.
Wish me luck and strength!!

I'll take another sip of the cola!!

Good morning!

Happy February 29.

I have big plans for today as far as getting cleaned up and organized, although I have already slept in a bit because I am tired.

My excellent news for the week is that dd1 had an ultrasound and the baby is growing and developing normally with a strong heartbeat. Her chance of miscarriage has been downgraded to the statistical norm for her age and race, and we are looking forward to a third grandchild in September!

Also last night Birdy rolled over for the first time while I was watching him on a video call!

One of the things I need to do today is some calendar planning, as March is starting to feel overwhelming. I have promised to milk the farm sitter's cow for a few days, We will be making a long visit to Birdy, my new pottery class is starting, Dh and I have three evening commitments, I need to do the lion's share of work for my spring sale, I need to get most of the garden started, I have two grape vines to move, my new fence should arrive at the end of the month, I need to make a decision on this buckling and possibly arrange pick up, and my in-laws have announced that they will be visiting us the first weekend in April - arrival and departure dates unclear.

But I am going to start this morning with picking up, dishes, yoga, chores, and the new additions to the counter of doom from the week. And building a fire, because after a few days of borrowed spring/summer it is winter again.

I'm happy I'm starting to get stuff done too. :) Long may it continue. Hoping too that the pace picks up. I think it will. We had a crazy cold front come through yesterday. Windy, and about a 60 degree drop as we'd been having record highs. But it has passed through and things are calm now. Bunny girl is doing well; I'm being a helicopter bunny mom to make sure she keeps on doing okay. I was glad that she was doing better enough that I felt safe leaving her to go to most of quilting yesterday morning and then Bible study in the afternoon. Also glad Monday's laundry was easy to put away.

My cousin is planning to go with me to the quilt Bingo on Sunday. I'm so glad to be getting together with her. She has such a demanding schedule. We are kind of different - a dutiful hardworking Hufflepuff, while I'm a Ravenclaw (and a dreamy Luna Lovegood one at that). But it's amazing how much family bond and common outlook remains strong between us even though we haven't gotten to see much of each other since our teens. I'm not close with her husband so basically I only see her when she has time free to meet with me, a lot less than I had hoped when she moved here. But I treasure what time we can get, and perhaps in a few years she will retire and we can have more.

Tomorrow will be swimming day, and Friday will be my payday with its attendant errands, then getting ready for the weekend, baking or buying goodies to take to church. I think - I hope - next week will be more free. I want to do some more things like I've been doing plus start on some more ambitious things.

Tatoulia, I've heard caffeine can do that for people who aren't habituated I've never actually experienced it because I started drinking coffee when I was 8.

Bean went to the grocery store with me, and he tried to convince me to put the soda back, which was kind of a hard moment, but I bought it anyway, because there will be a time when Bean is not here, and I will have a soda instead of something that's worse for me. And that is all the willpower I have right now. He picked grapefruit for our snack and corn and spaghetti for dinner.

CM, yay for fixing the fan and the bunny! I'm so happy to see you getting stuff done!

Bean and I cleared a lot more garden space today. I cut brambles and he cleared weeds with his bulldozer. We also put the grape arbor posts in (well, I did, he "held the ladder" - it's a folding ladder, I was two feet off the ground.) and laid down cardboard. Then we filled the wheelbarrow with loads of mulch and I dumped it and he spread it out with his hoe all by himself. He did a beautiful job. He needs a new hoe. The handle is getting short for him. (Or maybe he's growing?)

House is a mess. Likely to get worse the next couple of days, but I'm fine with that.

Congratulations on fixing the fan, cm. I love that. Like the old days before everything was disposable. Love it!

I got my recycling etc out and changed the kitty's box. About to do the dishes.

Speaking of soda, SubC, I never drink it myself (I drink unflavored seltzer) but I had a coupon for a free raspberry spiced coke and a I a few sips this afternoon and my focus is incredible. As to my review of the taste, it doesn't mean a thing to me and I wouldn't order it on purpose. Did not turn me into a soda drinker.


I made a list of things to do and I'm going to work on them now.

Today has gone well overall, despite one small glitch which is now resolved. My bunny was not wanting to eat her morning greens and had a gassy tummy. I had been just about to start the laundry but I took time to care for her. She seemed stable enough in a short while that I went ahead and put one load in and sat back in the room with her. Within a couple hours she bounced back and right now she is finishing her morning pellets. I was able to start a second load.

It's a beautiful warm day. I ate lunch. Late, but not ridiculously so. I have difficulty sometimes with fitting in lunch on busy days, because it's hard to figure out where to break in the middle of tasks. Sometimes it doesn't seem like it will work out. And then I eat very late.

I also got my vitamins and supplements taken with lunch, which is another thing that is too easy to skip but then I pay for it. My supplements are a carefully curated selection of stuff that helps my brain be less squirrelly and my temper more even. Plus they help my energy level. Definitely can tell when I skip or forget them too many times in a row.

I got my fan taken apart, removed the hairball and lint in it, squirted some WD-40, reassembled it, and it works a treat! Really glad to get that done what with the warmer weather seasons approaching. Next "been meaning to" task is sewing those jeans pockets on two remaining pairs.

Wanted to spend more time outdoors but it is already getting on. Had planned on reading my Bible study book, which I'd gotten behind on right out of the starting gate but was catching up. Tomorrow I hope I can make it to quilting later in the morning. Helping roommate the early part. The other ladies had been sick so we were on hold with it.

The quilt Bingo event is this coming Sunday. I'm hoping my cousin can come to it. And Friday I want to figure out a dessert to take Saturday for the setup, even if it's storebought because I'm not on speaking terms with my roommate's oven. It overbakes my cakes on the outside and leaves them undone in the middle, no matter how many tricks I try.

This week's schedule is a bit fuller still but not insane.

Tying that back to the official topic at hand - I think the structure of our society contributes a lot to hoarding issues. Financial and housing insecurities can make you hold on to things both for a feeling of security and "just in case" fears.

Also, things we don't need - like plastic toys and fast fashion - are so cheap and easy to get and heavily advertised, while things we DO need - like medical care, healthy food, safe shelter, and transportation, are expensive.

Today is a working outside with Bean day. I'm not sure which tasks we're going to get into, but I expect to use up some of the stored cardboard and get lots of exercise. He will be busy with his Tonka trucks. (The real metal kind, bought well used at garage sales for my ds who is almost 30.)

We also need groceries. I have a list. I am buying some sodas both for me and Dh, but the rest is produce, dairy, and a loaf of bread because I haven't gotten back to baking yet.

Benefits in this country are difficult. In my opinion and my opinion only, there isn't enough of a safety net for people. Living in a city, I see first hand the issues facing people. I don't have any answers or solutions, but the lack of true support, starting with housing and food, is so painful for me.

I used to belong to a parenting site where one of the women once said how much her husband appreciated being included because he didn't have many friends in real life "because real life doesn't have an edit button". It was funny, but I also get it.

Here, sometimes the typos drive me nuts and sometimes they are funny.

And sometimes I serial post when I would otherwise edit.

My dream of corner cabinets was short lived. Dh hung some insulation we had in the basement in the corners and it made very little difference, so he has dropped the idea. (And put the insulation away)

CM, the whole "disqualification" thing just makes me crazy. People talk about people not wanting to work, but it is not that black and white. Nobody wants to work when the work would put them worse off or effectively pay them a couple of dollars an hour!

My farm sitter has a really complicated family situation. She has two little sisters who were not legally adopted for years because her mom couldn't afford to stay home with them and give them the time and attention they needed if she gave up the foster care money. She has three kids who are legally fatherless because rights were terminated for abuse and so there is no child support - the state gives her benefits for them, but they can't garnish the wages of the biological father the way they would with a man who just abandoned his kids but wasn't dangerous, and on and on...

I wonder if you could barter some of your sewing or computer skills for some of the things you would like to pay for.

Yes I feel supported here! You all keep me honest even when it's hard.

Thr cleaners have been life changing for me, and they were on,y possible because of everything everyone here has helped me to accomplish! I cleaned out my storage, I cleaned out my house! I paid off my mortgage and I got out of debt. Once I took care of the hoard, it allowed me to take care of other things in my life. And it's been a group effort! We did this!

I'm glad you have the fencing decision made and ordered!

Okay, SubC, I'm relieved to hear I didn't put my foot in my mouth! ;) And I do think the fence is such a very useful thing, it will add value to your property, and of course it's not frivolous in the least. It's a wise investment, and making wise investments in upkeep is part of being a property owner.

You do have a point that sometimes writing is better - and in many ways I prefer it - the tricky part with this particular website is that once a comment is made, it can't be deleted or revised at all. (I learned that on Reddit there's even something called a "ninja edit" where if you edit a comment within three minutes of posting it doesn't show it has been edited, which I don't know if applies to what I'm thinking about or not, but sometimes it would at least be convenient for catching typos I make, like hoping no one would see a really goofy typo and I could fix it.) And in some life circumstances, like phone calls, I can really get in a snarl because I can't think on my feet verbally. So I guess there are advantages and disadvantages to both.

Liked your responses re "The Dreads." The struggle is real! And I don't consume a lot of decluttering media these days because so much of it is geared toward those with homes or at least apartments, and speaks of one's various rooms - well, all I have is the bedroom and parts of other rooms. So some of the info is just not applicable, and some of it gets me feeling discontent about not having a place of my own. Who needs that when they're trying to feel positive and energetic and ready to tackle decluttering. If I can pluck a handy tip here and there out of such materials, well and good, but otherwise... meh.

And yeah, those people who say you can't have something if you don't have the container - they make me angry, and I would get defensive some years back and that's why my hoarding remained entrenched for awhile. Now I am willing to be flexible, but I think it can still be a discernment process rather than just forcing oneself to ditch something because of some arbitrary decluttering influencer's rulebook. It's not one size fits all.

I also used to want to punch the computer screen when I'd read those ADHD decluttering articles that say to just hire someone to do the tasks you find hard. AS IF! Hellooo, not all of us have the money for that, Karen!

Tatoulia, I think it's great that you can afford the cleaners - and if I did win the lottery you have no idea how many employment opportunities I would gladly create for multiple people, haha! A personal assistant, accountant, secretary, cleaning crew, bunny nannies, management people to run the various companies and nonprofits I'd start - okay, Earth to CM...

Meanwhile... SubC, you are right, at least I don't have that awful decrepit van. I do want to keep my current one in good shape, and sometimes it's a challenge to find the $$$ for routine stuff. I hope that improves. I'm working on frugality in nonessential areas. And who knows, I will turn 62 in April, and I do want to talk to some people at the senior center and perhaps other places as to whether, if I got a very tiny part time job just to put a little back in the kitty here and there (because I don't want a big stressful job unless I feel like I could handle it), if I wouldn't have to worry anymore about getting kicked off disability. I know at 67 I will for sure convert to regular retirement and be home free, but it'd be good to be able to bring in a little these next few years.

Lila, I imagine you're busy and traveling and working a lot but we'll look forward to seeing you when we see you! Take care!

Yes Tatoulia, I was agreeing with and supporting all that about your cleaners!

I love hearing about all the people in your extended "family of choice."

Dh is rearranging my house for acoustics again. He wants to put some sound panels in the corners of the den. Currently those corners are just unused open space ne t to the bookshelf. I am negotiating for small built in corner cabinets with sound panels as the fronts. He could totally build that himself. We will see where this goes...

I got some work done outside today, but now I am tired from the wind. Big plans for more outdoor work with Bean tomorrow.

DANISH BREAD! I'd forgotten but now I'm chuckling all over again.

The cleaners are money well spent for me. They perform a service that I will never, ever do. Yes I'll change my sheets and vacuum but honestly at this point it is the best money I can spend. And I'm thoughtful about it, meaning that if I'm sick and have to cancel, I still pay them. It's budgeted and therefore I pay them. And I've told them that if they are sick, I'll still pay them.

I got a bag out of the house and another bag and a bin to goodwill. The person who is getting the car took me. Actually his daughter is getting the car. I told him today that if the cost is XXX I'll pay it. He's really happy about that. I've known his daughter since she was a little girl and I am getting ready to get her set up!

I am going to run a few errands and then I have an etching of my mother's I need to hang up. Also I have a few things for my sister (who comes in about two weeks) so I want to make sure I have her things ready. Have a lot I'll bring to her in the spring but some smaller stuff her that she should take on the bus with her.

Good morning!

I can't believe how late I slept!

We had a really good time with our friends last night and I am feeling rested and human. (And also fat - there was much food)

CM, I am also proud of you for getting the lightbulb taken care of. I was struck by the fact that you were able to go to the store, get what you needed, set up the ladder, and take care of the thing. There was a time when there would have been too many obstacles in your way - objects, van, cash flow, time, even the challenge of finding the correct light bulb. You have come a long way!

In response to your "dreads"

1. When the stuff "fluffs."

I also hate this. You feel like you have made so much progress, and then you go to put the things back and sometimes not only do you not have leftover space, the remaining items don't even fit! It is discouraging.

2. When I'm going along pretty well and suddenly my energy bottoms out.

I think this happens to everyone, but some of us (me included) are more likely to be surprised by it and have it be really dramatic. I know Dh will realize he has had enough of a project and stop and clean it up. I will keep going until I literally just can't, and then I walk away from everything exactly as it is and it sits there overwhelming me for weeks.

3. When something gets knocked over creating a bigger mess than before.

Makes me want to just scream, or cry. Especially if something gets destroyed that I had been meaning to get to. I want to beat myself up for not taking care of it in time.

4. When I'm just not sure what to do with something that I do want to keep, whether short term or long term, but it does not have a "home" and I can't figure out how to find or create one in the available space.

This is also really frustrating. Every time I see anything by Dana k. White about the "container concept" it makes me angry. "If it doesn't fit, you can't have it." well, that is lovely if you have reasonable options, but when you are limited in space or negotiating with other people, it can be a bit like telling someone they can't have their medical treatment because it's "elective" and they can't afford it - yes, I can live without this, but it is going to have an effect on my quality of life.

I watched a video by another organizer who says there are only three kinds of items in any space - trash, things with a home, and things without a home. She was talking about cleaning up when you have limited time and energy and said that most things were going to be the first two, so just focus there. So it turns out that I am an excellent housekeeper, because aside from my counter of doom, almost none of my mess is the first two!

So, I have energy, it is sunny, there is nothing specific on my calendar today, and it will be warm later - off to conquer the world!

Just got home and it's late and I'll come back tomorrow, but i wanted to say that I didn't think you put your foot in your mouth and I felt you were very kindly understanding of my situation and did not make me feel like I was being inconsiderate of yours by agonizing over my totally optional big splurge (privilege might have been a bad word choice - it has been overused). - so thank you for that support.

And I knew that was someone else.

Also I am glad we can "talk" about a lot of things here and I do better in type because I miss tone of voice and expression frequently in real life and also sometimes project them inaccurately and both of those can cause a lot more misunderstandings than unfortunate word choice in typing. People usually give you more slack to explain yourself in writing.

Yay bunny cages!

Back tomorrow

SubC, I probably stuck my foot in my mouth without intending to. I hope you didn't think I meant you re the dollar amount I mentioned; it was someone else I was thinking about and the someone is actually a very good friend and probably didn't realize how certain remarks sounded. Plus this person is very generous and has helped me out some, and sends help to overseas family probably more than I know. Finally, I was generalizing and didn't think of high cost of living places, just Kansas. This stuff is hard to talk about. So I probably should refrain from doing so. My apologies if I offended in any way. I think sometimes it's awkward trying to talk about some things when we all can't talk in person and we don't have tone of voice or interactive conversation to facilitate expression of ideas.

Came here actually to report that I got the bunny cages cleaned and because I did it sooner it was less hassle. :)

And earlier I got the outdoor lightbulb changed. I'd gone to the hardware store to get a bug bulb and on the way back I stopped by my storage unit. Got a few more thoughts about what I'm going to do there, and soon I shall be starting on that project.

Re decluttering, I realize there are things I dread so much, such as:

1. When the stuff "fluffs."

2. When I'm going along pretty well and suddenly my energy bottoms out.

3. When something gets knocked over creating a bigger mess than before.

4. When I'm just not sure what to do with something that I do want to keep, whether short term or long term, but it does not have a "home" and I can't figure out how to find or create one in the available space.

What are everyone's Dreads? I remember awhile back I posted a little motto "BANISH DREAD" and Tatoulia thought it said "DANISH BREAD" lol.

CM, I think $40,000 can be "poor" and $40,000 can be "rich". It depends on your needs and your cost of living - for example, if you have significant uninsured medical needs, or live in parts of CA, you can end up homeless and hungry on $40,000.

And it can be easy to say move to somewhere cheaper, but you might be telling that person to leave everyone they love. And in theory there are government safety nets, but i'm sure you know how tangled and full of holes they can be.

I have been broke (Being broke is a temporary situation. Being poor is a state of mind. - variously attributed) and I have been "rich" (able to meet all my needs and have enough wants to make me feel spoiled) (I have been "rich" making less than minimum wage with two babies and a husband with no job) Barring disaster, I am always going to be "comfortable" because Dh job takes care of my needs. My wants are another thing. But also I am realistic about what is a want. I think that is where the people you are talking about come in. They don't realize how many wants they get.

I remember when Dd was in brownies, my coleader told me "I wish *I* could stay home with my (only) kid." There was a time in my life when I would have jumped in and started explaining to her how she could do that, but by then I was old enough and jaded enough to realize that she didn't really mean that. What she meant was "I wish I could get my hair done every six weeks and my nails done every month and go out to high end restaurants frequently with my husband and live in our four bedroom two car garage high end subdivision house with the pool and still belong to the health club, and buy expensive new clothes and shoes every season for me and my child, and own lots of expensive jewelry and accessories, and drive my leased luxury suv, and drink with my friends on weekends, and have my purebred dog groomed regularly, and my house cleaned by somebody else and my yard work done by somebody else like I do now, And ALSO not have to have a job."

Those are all wants.

You don't get to have all of your wants. It isn't good for you anyway. Even Elon Musk doesn't get all of his wants, but I think he gets more than is good for him.

I love that Tatoulia has a good job and that she can afford house cleaning and that it makes her happy. And she appreciates it. I'm happy that Lila got a new phone. I was excited about your computer. We all make choices. We all have different resources to make them with, but they are still choices. People without choices don't have time to post on here.

I am currently trying to decide if I can add another $150 in expenses to my spring because I found a buck I want (he checks all the boxes I have been looking for for two years and that is a good price, so of course I find him literally the day after I order the fence) I also want a guard goose because of the Fox eating my ducks, but that is going to have to wait. I may lose all the ducks, but the goose has to grow up before it is useful and I could lose the ducks during that time anyway. I will try to keep them safe.

Anyway, I built a fire and then I went down a rabbit hole looking at my spending choices and income sources (I'm really glad I got that June camp job now) and made a lot of bad eating choices because I was feeling stressed. And after writing all this out, I'm realizing how ridiculous it is for me to be stressed over these things. I didn't get anything done or much decided (no more new plants or seeds this year, no more new pottery tools for a while, and I'm skipping the school talent show tomorrow night)

But I'm going to take a shower and go out with our friends and start again tomorrow.

Hi, SubC

So you pulled the trigger on the fence project - good deal. I wish I had had your money and credit sense when I was much younger...alas. But I think you'll be glad to have it all done at once, because time is money too, and there'll be less disruption. And as far as I'm concerned, you needn't apologize for "privilege" - I think that has become too much of a thing these days, and what has been lost sight of is that if a person is not arrogant and boasting and contemptuous of poor people, one should not feel obliged to apologize just for the sake of it. I know you're humble, that's all that's needed. Take it from a poor person - I have encountered people who were clueless when speaking to me of being "poor" when they make $40-50k a year and upwards, but I don't perceive you that way at all. For what it's worth, my two cents. Lol. Anyway, hope all goes smoothly on the project.

I'm in the mood to putter today. That is good. Roommate and I went swimming yesterday and I would say I'm about midway back from the out-of-shape state post Covid. I swam some leisurely laps instead of merely doing paddling around and stretches like the other day. And I think it has done me good in terms of mood and brain being more on the ball. So I'm going to go over to the hardware store and get an outdoor light for above the side door (I'm the official ladder climber here because roommate has more trouble with vertigo from her allergies). I'm going to see if I can fix that fan that I took apart awhile back, and perhaps other stalled out projects as well. More later.

Good morning!

Tatoulia, did you do your goodwill bag?

Lila, I hope you aren't working too hard. And don't put stuff on the table ;)

I did order my fence yesterday. I decided to go all in. I now have a frighteningly high (for me) cc balance. I have the money set aside though, I just have to transfer it. That is the first half, which is what I planned on. The second half will be due in about 5 weeks when the fence ships. I need to keep my cc clean because I have a really low limit (on purpose - I got this card in my name only when I was first working part time. After a year they raised my limit by $500. I contacted them and told them not to raise my limit again unless I asked.) and if I am carrying more than a couple of bags of goat feed, the second charge will be denied. So I need to pay attention and not use the card unless i need to and then pay it right off. (And in the fall I need to start working on my "replacing my car" fund again.)

It's supposed to be really cold today and start snowing in a couple of hours. Dh and I have plans with friends tonight, but the day is pretty open.

Probably start a fire, catch up on school stuff again (I'm getting more organized) and do more clay work.

I am now very motivated to have a good spring sale!

Lila, I think maybe on the question of idolatry vis a vis material possessions and clutter, I've had similar thoughts and maybe here's a helpful way to look at it. God doesn't want us to worship things that aren't Him, be it false gods or the created goods of the world over the Creator. But what we have sometimes fallen into the trap of something that's not like we're building an altar to our clutter and bowing down to it and sacrificing animals to it - obviously nothing that blatant and absurd - but more subtle, and it can be healed easily enough, that's the good news.

Our attention - yes, perhaps we have placed our attention in the wrong direction at times, and that has shifted our focus away from what is truly valuable. But we must remember - it's because God has all that LOVE He wants to give us, so He is trying to get our attention so He can. That's not to say respect for God's majesty and omnipotence is unimportant. But He made the decision to create, and to create us for love and relationship with Him and others. So He just wants us to be fully present, not scattered and distracted, so we can wholeheartedly give and receive love.

What do you think? I'm not a theologian, these are merely my extemporaneous thoughts.

Still trying to get my bearings after the disruption of this month. Had another stupid episode with the Zoom doctor appointment, the rescheduled one on Wednesday. Camera on laptop not found error message, it was 30 minutes till the appointment, and I was frantic. Ended up using roommate's laptop. Then this morning was going to see what software glitch could have happened. Googled it, and right away saw a thing about the little camera switch on the side. A lightbulb went on in my head. Sure enough. The button must've gotten slid over when I was transporting the computer to the tech guy about that other problem.

I've just been stressed about that, and slow and fragmented about a lot of other stuff. But there is light at the end of the tunnel, I hope. I will need to do laundry again soon. I'm having trouble settling in to read my Bible study lessons and that drives me nuts because I am interested. I did get the typing and graphics done for the bunny group, a few days later than I intended but it's done.

Next week I hope to make a more focused effort on the clutter, and I can do a few small things to get rolling - it's just been hard trying to figure out the times to do things with a chopped up schedule and inconsistent energy levels.

Hi everyone! I'm already late for work!

Jumping in shower then off to the office! I need to gather a goodwill bag tonight. I need to keep moving forward.

Good morning!

Good day yesterday. I got my seeds planted, did some work in my pottery studio, and during a break in the rain, laid out the markings for the proposed grape arbor so Dh can see it and we can discuss the location.

I also had a conversation with the fence manufacturer for my dream portable fencing. I am going to order in the next week and I am struggling with the size of the order between buy less and save money now and buy more and have everything I want and save money long term but be tight for a while. I realize that this is a very privileged deposition to even have the choice.

It might help me with the not buying food with empty calories and stuff I don't need if I just order my fence...
School today. Need to get moving!

Lila, ten days in a row is a lot! Especially when you have to travel and be "on" the whole time.

Just try to keep your head above water.

I'm glad you found your tea.my tea tonight (replacing the evening snack habit) is green tea with ginger.

I think whatever helps you make progress - physically, mentally, emotionally, or spiritually is an ok way to look at things. Matthew 6:21 kind of goes with what you are saying I think. - putting value on things.

Tatoulia, good luck with the dresses! I love vintage clothes.I have a couple of my grandmother's dresses from the 40s that I still wear! And I tend to shop vintage style when I can. I wish I had the body to wear a flapper dress - i would buy one.

I did Mr. Kitty's box yesterday and dropped my recycling today. Mr. Kitty has been using the inside box a lot more lately. I think he's feeling his age.

The counter is still slow going, but it is moving in the right direction. There was a lift the flap book on it that dd1 loved and Bean finished off that was resting in the counter pile on the theory that I would repair it.

The illustrator is still working. It was 4.99 total (free shipping) to have the book arrive on my front porch. I told myself "buy art from living artists" and ordered a new copy which arrived today. The old one has been recycled.

hello friends, as usual, running around busy. But I took 4 hours of a break mid-day, played with my dog, rested, watched tv, read, and just came and caught up on posts. I am working a ten day stretch without any days off, including 3 days away leading a retreat. I love my work and enjoying it. I'll be really ready for some days off after all this, and things settle down. This is the week I work the most out of the whole year.

I did find my lost tea and will update on the Lost and found thread. I am not losing any weight, am not decluttering much, but am working on my lent stuff and feeling convicted of some of my behaviors that I want to change. Been looking at idols, and isn't hoarding a form of idolatry maybe? Stuff that hinders. No offense meant to anyone. I know hoarding is also and emotional and mental issue not always within our control. But I am trying to think about it in a way that helps me change.

I will be gone all weekend so see ya when I get back, probably.

That was a full day, SubC!

I got my trash and recycling out last night. Changed the cat boxes. I went to the car and it's in good shape. I have a bunch of my mother's dresses from the 50s and 60s and I'm going to try to wash them and see if I can sell them. They are so lovely. We shall see what happens.

Today is a work day and I'm still sitting here in my pjs. I have a meeting at one so will need to shower and look alive.

Good evening.

Tatoulia, Bean had a pajama morning too today.

Good job on the animal donations.

I am tired from a full (and fun) day with Bean.

We washed some of the windows, and built and played with an extensive village (which we cleaned up and I put away in the basement) and we went for a walk by the creek and played board games, and tried out a new book on record - the record will have to be recycled, but the book is not one I have a different copy of, and listened to his favorite one again. Gave scraps to the chickens, took out the compost, had a chat with the buck..

The counter of doom is basically the same - I dealt with all the new things and a few tiny bits and pieces that needed to be redistributed in the house - twist ties, pipe cleaners, bottle caps, that sort of thing.

Ok, I don't know if this will be a cross post, because it was interrupted by an hour FaceTime with birdy, but I'm just going to post it and head off to bed.

I love hearing about your plantings, SubC! So much fun to think of spring. Cm I'm glad your friend is ok. Lila, how awful to lose two friends. We are here for you.
I slept til noon then hung out in my pjs most of the day. Enjoyed a long call with BF while I had my cup of coffee. Late in the afternoon I walked down to the cat shelter with some towels and a very fluffy fleece bathrobe.

I ordered new down pillows when I was sick and Emiko took my old ones. I told her to wash the pillow protectors before using. She lives my old bedding and pjs because I spend a small fortune on them. It's how I grew up so I can't shake it now.

So I got the bag of animal donations out. Now to get to the car tmr and make some progress.

Good evening!

I reclaimed two more inches of the counter of doom and ran another load of laundry and had a good day with Bean.

I also planted onions, scallions, and shallots, but I ran out of seed starting mix before I got to the leeks. I will buy some more tomorrow when I return Bean. I have a coupon for the hardware store next to the library.

And I shelled a box of dried beans that had just been sitting around since I picked and dried them in fall. So now they are ready to cook. I might pull some out to plant this year.

Hi CM and Tatoulia! Thanks for coming by and checking in.

Tatoulia, I'm glad you got your hair cut.

CM, I'm glad your friend and your computer are both ok.

I got some stuff prepped for my classes today and finished off the last (for now) of my work emails.

I cleared a few more things off the counter of doom and recycled some paper and did some general organization.

And I also started a flat of pepper seeds.

Tomorrow I'm hoping to do onions, leeks, and shallots.

Also Dd is bringing Bean over to play in the snow and spend the night. Dsil has plans all afternoon and Dd is exhausted and nauseous. Which makes me very happy, because it's a good sign that the pregnancy is going to stick this time. She is almost a week further than she was with the other two, and with those she never felt this bad and started to feel better a few days before she miscarried. With Bean she felt awful the first three or four months.

Quick drive by. All is well here. I'm not caught up on posts. My friend Emiko was here today and she brought some fun stuff from her recent trip to Japan. We didn't do anything house-wise because I was helping her with her work stuff. I also got a hair cut today. I needed one before my mother died so can you imagine how long it had gotten in the past 2-1/2 months?

I am feeling well it find myself falling asleep very early. I'm going to go to bed now. I need to clean out my car this weekend. Yes I still have it but I'm not driving it. The exhaust is sounding a bit weird. I want to hurry up and get the exhaust fixed and give it to my neighbor. They will never be able to fix the exhaust so I will do so as a positive thing to get them on their feet.

I'm going to bed now. Very tired.

All I can do right now is bop in to say Hi, glanced at posts but not thoroughly. Lila, I'm sorry about your friends. I knew great relief this week when I was finally able to reach the friend I'd helped hand out Halloween candy last fall, then she didn't decorate for Christmas which isn't like her, and going by her house it was dark and deserted looking for 2-3 months and I knew she has health issues so my mind was going to worst case scenario. It is hard the older we get and losing people becomes more of a possibility.

SubC, I'm thankful your building didn't blow up with the gas leak. How scary!

Thursday was a bit crazy and I haven't finished regrouping really. I was supposed to have a Zoom doctor appointment that morning, but it just so happened that Wednesday evening my laptop downloaded Windows updates. Fine, I thought, and on Thursday morning it wanted to restart to finish them. But then it got stuck. I had to call and reschedule the appointment, then bundle up the laptop and take it down to Mr Tech Whiz at the library. Luckily he talked some sense into it in about ten minutes. I had an enjoyable chat with him and another tech guy, plus while I was thinking of it I got some of the file directory and user profile duplication cleaned up (which had been messy since the original Blue Screen of Death months ago).

Yesterday roommate and I went swimming. It was a cold day, not pleasant to get out in but the pool was warm. Today we went to breakfast with another friend as we do most Saturdays. Then my former roommate needed me to take her to the store and we had a fun time but it was a day of much conversation and I felt a little tired and needing to decompress.

The bunny rescue needs me to do some computer things none of which are hard but the disruption in my schedule plus the tiredness has made it seem harder to get going on. I'm several days behind on my Bible study already too, and there is the quarterly bunny event tomorrow.

I just want to be able to catch up but not in a harried, pressured way, y'know?

Next week will have the rescheduled doctor appointment, a covid shot hopefully, and just trying to stay abreast of the usual things. The weather will be nicer. Once again I'm just trying to find a rhythm and flow with the Lent/spring season activities gearing up earlier this year and me having been thrown off by illnesses and such. Hoping that by the end of next week or the week after I'll feel more in the groove.

Yoga, chores, breakfast, fire, a load in the washer, AND I have cleared off one foot of the counter of doom.

Dh leaves recycling/donations/trash on that counter because it is my job to sort them to their destination. This was decided by me, because he does not care enough to sort and will just do whatever is easiest - which used to be throw everything in the trash can.

Then I cancelled the trash service and told him he was welcome to call and get it reinstated, but I would no longer pay the bill, empty the wastebaskets, take out the trash, haul the cans to the road, or bring them back. Nor would I call the trash company when they did not pick up the trash (which at the time was averaging one week out of four)

So now my system is easiest.

He does throw really obvious trash into the bathroom or kitchen trash can - we don't have gross things on the counter. And he leaves the compost on the kitchen counter for me to divide into compost or chicken food - usually in bowls or on a cutting board)

Anyway, I'm going to ask him to put new items on that clear foot so I can address them first and know I am making real progress when I clean something off the rest of the counter.

Lila, I will be thinking of you today. I generally don't do funerals, but I went to the last one because it was important to me to let the family know how much I cared. It ended up being a really healing experience. I hope whatever you decide brings you comfort.

Please google "donate phone women's shelter" or "donate phone domestic violence"

The table is half cleared! Now the table will stay half cleared! And get better! And there will be family meals! I have faith.

It's very cold today and it snowed last night. It's not supposed to warm up into the 30s until tomorrow, but I'm trying to get a bunch of stuff done today in case Dd wants to bring Bean sledding. (They have a tiny yard and their only hill is short, steep and ends in the garage door - the parks are full of big kids)

At the moment it's a slow start though.

Dh noticed that 1 - I have lost some weight, and 2 - I have made progress on the counter of doom. Both of those make me feel really good.

oh, also, SubC, invisible tasks checked off are still progress, and lift something off our plate.

ohhh SubC, you mind reader!! Do you know how many old cell phones I have in my bedroom and in totes? I don't either, but I would guess six. I am pretty sure I have never gotten rid of a cell phone except to pass it on to a kid here and there. Maybe I will possibly start to begin to think about doing something with them... maybe?? I will try!

After my last post, I worked on the kitchen table. I threw out a few junk mail, stacked my son's things, pushed all dil's food items onto one spot, put away a few cans of soup and some snacks in the cabinet. I admit I took one box and just chucked it into that storage-like small bedroom. But, now the table is about half cleared.

So that is something. I am tired and I really don't want to go to the funeral tomorrow because it is hard, but I do want to go because she was my friend, to support the family, and to hear the beautiful sentiments. But really I want to curl up at home and cry. Not sure why I feel so low.

Oh, I also made dinner from the freezer. I thawed 2 kinds of soups (when I make soups I freeze the leftovers) and one vegan meal I bought some time ago and never ate. Funny, the kids loved the vegan meal. I didn't. We also had muffins my friend gave me the other day.

I am so tired, drained, and melancholy.

Lila, I am so sorry. To lose two friends without warning is a very heavy burden no matter what their age. The emotional load you carry for teen is already a lot.

I am glad you are getting your new phone! (The old one gets recycled, right? Net zero.

I feel like I have done so much today, but it is invisible because it was mostly computer work.

My last thing was preparing to order my garden fencing next week. I really need to do that so that it will arrive before things eat my garden.

I like 'a chair is not a shelf', SubC. And I am hoping I can get people to stop putting things on the table. I don't know where they can put things, so I need to make room. DIL has several food items on the table because we are out of room on the counters and in shelves. I need to create more room in the actual kitchen, so the table can stay clear. I have done nothing on this today.

I did get one big thing done today. My phone has been dying. As in, needs recharged constantly, is lagging and glitching... Son2 says it is old (he is older than TotsDad and Son who lives in my house. He was helping me choose a phone online, looking at features and such, and when I chose one, he purchased it FOR me, because he works at a seller, and gets it much lower cost, but cannot be reimbursed (rule for employees) so he said it is an early birthday gift! What a nice gift. I am very excited that in about a week I will have my new (refurbished) phone. I have always bought refurbished or used phones and never have had any trouble. Then I chose a case which I will buy online.

I also helped with the grandkids and tried to do a little in my room. Got my desk cleaned off and organized.

I had not shared but two friends died in the last 2 weeks. They were older friends from church, but both were unexpected and sudden. It's sad for us and for their spouses left behind in shock. I have a funeral to attend tomorrow. Another friend has a very dire diagnosis this week and that is also hard. So I wish I could take a few days off and just be quiet, but I have to work tomorrow and Sunday. I do get Monday as a paid day off.

I am so emotionally tired, though. Teen had a huge meltdown the other day that wiped me out.

Greetings oh mysterious Lila. Here is the secret to the table. It sounds easy, but it is not. But it is simple: rule #1 - Do not put anything on it. Even for a minute. Do not let other people put things on it. You may have to find yourself saying out loud to your self - "don't put things on the table."

But all the things in the house are somewhere. They might not be in their best place, but their best place is not on the table, so don't put them there.

The things not in the house should only come in the house if you need them. If you need them, they should have somewhere to go that isn't the table because you don't need things on the table. Don't put them on the table.

Now, take things off the table. At whatever speed you can.

There are a finite number of items on the table, so if you follow rule #1, it will become clear!!

I have managed to clear off all but three chairs in my house by telling myself a chair is not a shelf. (Those three chairs I have decided actually are shelves. Because it would be better if I had a shelf where they are, but sometimes I need the extra chairs - at which times the things on the chairs have to go in boxes on the floor of some other space - sometimes my bedroom.)

Good job getting rid of the jeans! I am proud of you!

Did I miss you telling about people dying? I am sorry.

I do understand the introvert/people thing. The hard thing about being an introvert is that even the people you love become exhausting

I finished a lot of school work, cleared a few items off the counter of doom, and worked in the pottery studio for a bit. Poco a poco.

hello, it's the elusive Lila here. Reading and catching up after a very busy week.

SubC, I know about dreaded tasks, paperwork, phone calls. It is no fun but it does feel so good once we finish.

CM, I have never heard of the Gesima Sundays, but I really like the idea! I will make a note to look into this for next year. I got a Lenten devotional this year, which has a short one page reading and then 2 pages to journal, from Ash Weds through Holy Week. I am enjoying it so far.

Tatoulia, the table is pretty important. But also overwhelming. It is still not cleared, but I will work on it today a bit, as it is my day off.

I am emotionally drained from people dying and from stress. I have a big "away" event next weekend and I know I will enjoy it but it is bringing up stress in me. It is a group I lead, so I have to be there, sleep there, lead everything. A blessing I enjoy, but my introvert self is wishing I had delegated this.

I am in my bedroom at my desk, because it is a bit overwhelming being with people all day even though I enjoy them. I needed to type in peace without stopping to take markers out of a kid's mouth or do little things they need. The only thing I dislike in here is that typing on my laptop seems SO LOUD. I am not sure if this is because it is on a wooden desk, or because it is echoing from the "hutch" in front of it, or what. Any ideas? Maybe I could try some kind of mat under the laptop?

But the desk is nice, and more organized than piles of stuff on the couch. I can't leave my bin of important papers on the couch anymore, so this is nice.

I accomplished one thing today. I took a pair of jeans I have been wearing anytime I am at home and not working, and I put them in the trash. They had a big big rip in the inner thigh, but who cares when I am working at home? Son noticed it though, so let's have a little self respect and ditch them.

I will be working on my bedroom for a bit and then also the table.

Hope you all are well today!

Good morning!

I'm off to a strong start. Honestly I think part of my problem is that I have a Bean day, and then a recovery/prep day when I am still needing a lot of rest and low on energy, and then a school day, and then a recovery/prep day, and then a school day, and then what should be a recovery/home jobs day, but lately has been overtaken by a (fun, I'm not complaining) activity with Dh or Dd and Bean or a scheduled event, followed by another of the same with the same factors, then Bean again.

Having two days in a row with nothing specific on the schedule feels really good.

I did yoga, my chores are done, I finished the paperwork and walked it up to the mailbox - with a side ramble down the creek to make it over a quarter mile, and I have a fire going in the woodstove.

Last night I made a little progress on the counter of doom, and I anticipate more later today. But to start, it is just a few minutes past when I would usually leave for school, and I am going to sit in front of the fire and catch up on computer tasks (formerly known as paperwork) for my classes.

Holy electrons Batman!

They already sent my the document - as a pdf.

Sure glad I didn't pay $300 for next day service!

I did the online task.
Hopefully I did it right.
It took me two hours.
They will either send me a document or a refund of my payment with a note that I did something wrong. Hopefully if it's the second one, they will be specific.

Now I wait. For more than three business days because I chose not to pay for any of their expedited services. I do not know how many more that three business days. With my luck 8-10 weeks.

When I get the document I can fill out the next form.

School is cancelled tomorrow because there is a gas leak in the building. The kiln was running when I left yesterday, but I guess it didn't blow up. They would have told me, right?

I'm having trouble getting started this morning. Everything I need to do feels overwhelming, and I am reluctant to start a fire because it will be warm later. Which is silly, because I can let it go out and it is cold now. I know I just need to start in somewhere, even if it is very small.

CM, I'm glad you got your paperwork done and got to go to mass. Good job getting things out of the house!