Ack! I posted that on the wrong thread! For some reason my keyboard won't come up on the site this morning and I had to cut and paste from notes.

So nice to know someone is thinking of me in the evening!

So the connection of this to decluttering is to remove the items and triggers that cause you to snack. But you have other people living in your house. So that is hard.

Also try to replace foods and habits. Like the tea for snacking.

I have been using two mental tricks. Whenever I look at snack food I think "that is Dh bag of chips" or "those are Bean's cookies." Not when I want to eat it, when I buy it, when I unpack it, when I open a cabinet and see it - it helps put my brain in a space where that food is not something I can eat. Because it is not my food.

Also, I tell myself I have to eat things - like "I have to eat these carrots and a banana today" then when I want to eat, I already have a healthy focus on something to eat. And there is less room in my stomach for the other things.

And I'm sure that it helps that now that it is spring I am very busy doing physical labor.

p.s., I could totally be on 600 lb Life, the show... if left to my own devices. I would be the 600-lb-life-Hoarders edition.

I am about 250 tho.

thanks all for the thoughts. Alanna, may I ask how old you are? It sounds like you're a teacher. I am mid 50s with a bunch of adult kids and a bunch of little grandkids, and an ex who was (is) a hoarder. I formed in myself some sort of hoarding issue as well, although not as impactful as his, but one of my sons came to move his family in with me so he helped me sort an immense amount of stuff and donate it. I started the Daily Tally thread and got rid of over 1000 items last year! Not counting actual trash. I am proud of that and working towards 600 this year. You are welcome to post on that thread too if you find it helpful.

I am feeling stuck, very stuck. Not just in sorting/cleaning, but in just about everything. Weight gain, incativity, sluggishness (thatnks to very low thyroid that hopefully my Dr will address), feeling like moving, etc. I look at other people's lives and wonder, how do they do all that? doing stuff wth family, friends, working in their gardens and yards, being active, cooking dinner, cleaning, all that. How? I barely can keep up with the basics of laundry and dishes and taking a shower 2 or 3 times a week.

I did go get my hair cut today. I did help Teen prep some food and talked to her for a bit. I did spend some time with Tot. I want to do more but I don't want to do more.

I would sum up my current mood lately as ambivalent, and slightly overwhelmed, but unmotivated to do anything. If it were not for my work that I love, and my grandkids, I would do basically nothing.

Hey Everyone :)

Sorry for the delayed post - I've been so busy marking and setting exams that I haven't had time for anything else. I still need to finish some marking and get started on the backlog of washing this weekend. So nothing done in the kitchen yet unfortunately.

Tatoulia, I'm sorry you're feeling wistful. Hopefully the busy weekend (with perhaps some spring sunshine) will make you feel better? The house in Greece sounds lovely - all the pictures I've seen of Greece look like a perfect vacation spot. Well done for changing litter boxes, picking up packages, and getting the garbage out. :)

Glad you had a wonderful time with family SubC! I'm going to try your idea of gathering a bag of trash on trash day - you hit the nail on the head with the double checking (I get distracted and then get worried I missed something and then double check, which wastes a lot of time). The trash gets put out on the curb on a Monday, but I might need to do some gathering on the Sunday (not ideal as I try to rest on a Sunday) to get things out in time.

Good luck with your sale SubC, I hope it goes well. :) The pottery sounds great, so I'm sure you'll sell well. Hope you can get the car fixed soon, these things always seem to happen at the most in opportune moments (at least for me that's when it happens).

Thanks for the warm welcome Lila. My heart goes out to you, because I can so relate to your distress about ex coming and possibly taking your things. But I'm glad your nephew will be able to help, it sounds like that'll make things easier. The stickers are also a great idea! I'm not sure if ex's things are all together in one place or if they're mixed in with your things, but it might be helpful to put his things all in one place so he's not going through your things too (maybe nephew can help move?). Another suggestion is to put old sheets/blankets/covers over your things - sort of an out of sight, out of mind approach (so he doesn't see something of yours that he wants/thinks is his). Not sure if any of these suggestions are helpful, but I've used similar approaches before when we've needed to have strangers (e.g. repair people) in the house.

Ah, I like your jamming with your frogs CM. :-D Gave me a good smile. Sorry Spring seems to be slow for you - maybe you're operating on my Autumn time when the days are getting shorter and things are slowing down. ;)

I must be off to try and get some washing and dishes done. Have a wonderful day everyone. :)

Lila, that sounds hopeful.

Of course you don't want your stuff missing.

I'm going to cross my fingers that the truck is big and he clears everything out. I'm imagining how lovely it will be to have your storage room back - space to sort things out in, and then to store the things that you really want to keep!

I've been working on garden and pottery. I leave for my sale in an hour and a half - I need to get there early to finish setting up because I couldn't last night. There is something wrong with my car. I was afraid I wasn't going to make it to work yesterday.

Dh came down after school and looked it over, then told me it was safe to drive on low speed surface streets for a while, so he followed me to the studio, I unloaded, and he followed me home. It took forever.

Today I am driving the truck.

Wish me luck that's will sell a lot and not buy stuff.

(Well, I will probably buy stuff - I will try to exercise restraint, but I am still mad at myself for not buying that one set of curtains last week.)

I broke a bowl when I was unloading last night, superstition says that's for luck.

Gotta go milk!

My day off! Soooo needed this.

Thank you for your thoughts. I did call my nephew and got the date he and his brother are coming with the moving truck (next Saturday). Then I emailed ex and asked what his plan is. He said he is coming Thurs to sort and "dispose" of things etc. So I emailed him back to let him him there is no room here to sort, and my trash cans are full every week with TotsFam living here. I suggested he take the neatly packed totes and boxes as-is, but that if he is determined to sort, he do it in the moving truck and take anything he does not want to goodwill before he leaves, as I do not want things left here. He was agreeable to that, so I think it will probably be ok.

TotsDad is going to move the mattresses out either tonight or tomorrow so I can start looking at boxes. I have some colored stickers I can put on the boxes and totes to indicate whose they are. I think I will try to color code them and tell nephew to only take those colors (and ex's name on them). I do have things, as I said, that I don't want him taking, that I need to move to my bedroom. I am not trying to keep anything of his. There are some "mutual" belongings that I am sure he will not use, and the court already decided that everything in my house belongs to me. But I did save his stuff as he was renting. I just don't want my stuff missing. You know?

Today so far I:
- sorted the fridge and threw out anything bad
- took 3 bags of trash to the bin outside
- washed out the fridge shelves, mostly.
- wiped some counters
- put towels and my jeans in the wash

I am going to put the wash into the dryer, sort the cabinets and wash them out (just a few), and rest. I have a cold from the grandkids.

What are you all doing this weekend?

Oh Lila, such a mess. I'm so sorry. I do not want him "sorting" through things and making a mess in your house.

I hope your nephew will be helpful to you and let you know when they are coming and agree to only load marked boxes and start in the storage room and just load everything as is.

I wish you had half a dozen strong young men who could be there to help. I remember when we moved my heart daughter out of her house. Her x was abusive. My son was 18 and I just told him to get in the truck. When we got there, there were already four pick up trucks parked on the street. The women in her life had called in all of their men and we just loaded everything she pointed to. Her x was home, but he was never in a room with fewer than two guys who were in much better shape and she had a wall of women around her at all times.

At least the mattresses will be gone. Mattresses are big!

CM, I forgot to say that my spring is going slowly to, although biologicakspring is going too fast. With rain and commitments I am struggling to get my garden in, and I feel like it is almost summer!

I have a carefully planned out list for the day. The only problem is that it includes at least two days worth of work. I am going to have to try very hard to stay focused, prioritize, and not do things that aren't on the list.

Speaking of - must go now.

Lila I am glad that you are posting and sorry about your distress. I will be thinking of you. Hi SubC Hi Cm Hi Alanna. Maybe not sad but wistful or blue? A small step up from sad.

BF's birthday is coming up. I have a full weekend ahead so that will help me through.

Good morning friends. I have read your posts and am glad to hear the good things going on. Tatoulia, I agree you seem sad, so I am praying you will find some light in the dark places and that you will feel loved.

hi SubC, I missed you too! I was working and working of course, and dealing with stuff, and starting to feel stressed. I had a bad headache this morning so stayed home to rest. I probably need to go to work this afternoon though.

Hi CM also! And hi to our new friend, Alanna! It's great to hear from you and I hope you will post all about your thoughts and how we can support you.

SubC, I would love to move all of ex's hoard out to the garage, but it is a moving van's worth and at least half the boxes are too heavy for me to carry - books and piles of things crammed in. I am very nervous about the whole situation. I do not like the idea of ex being in my home taking things, especially if I have to be at work!! And my boys also have to be at work. I was told ex is coming "a few days early to sort." I am very unhappy about that. I just want him to take all his boxes and go!! Not leave things here for me to deal with! I may have to make that clear, somehow... but how to enforce? I don't know. I am pretty sure he still has a key to my house, too. I am 99% sure he would not just come inside and take things - but a lot of my things are in the garage and storage room.

My plan to try and mitigate the stress is for TotsDad to take the old gross mattresses out of the garage and to the dump this Saturday. Then I will be able to access all the totes and boxes. Maybe in some way I can mark what is his, with stickers? or something? I do want to remove MY things from that area completely.

I hope to manage when he is here and I am here. I had a bad experience in the past with my first ex who came in and TOOK things after we were divorced.

Changing locks does not matter if you have a neurodivergent kid who will let them in regardless (oldest son,who let his dad in all those years ago but loves in another state now, and Teen, who no matter what I say will let their dad in and probably help him load up my stuff!).

My bedroom is the safe room which is locked and he has no key.

See how this is upsetting me?

I need to email ex and define when he will be here, and then call my nephew who is helping load but would honor my wishes. If nephew came before ex, he could help me move stuff.

Tired thinking about it.

Good morning!

Alanna, have you had a chance to do something in your kitchen yet?

How does trash leave your house? Do you put it out on the curb on a specific day? Or take it to a collection point? Can you try to set aside some time right before collection to carefully gather a bag of trash and take it out, checking as you go and reminding yourself that you are checking carefully so you won't need to do it twice? This would save you some time and hopefully help clear out a bit.

Tatoulia, you sound a little sad. I hope that life throws you some more positive things. You are very accepting of change, but it is still difficult. Especially when the changes are unchosen or involve losses.

CM "driving down the street jamming with my frogs" - lol!

Lila, missing you!

I had a wonderful time with my family. My house is still a mess, but I have started the laundry and mostly kept up with the dishes.

Also, still working on time management, and my morning computer time is up. Have a great day everyone!

This spring seems slow to get started. I don't mean just the weather, although that does keep reversing back to cooler just when one thinks it is progressing normally for the time of year. Storms predicted for Thursday and beyond, rain definitely needed.

No, it's spring activity and projects that are slow getting going too. I'm not sure what to do first and about the time I might make some sort of decision or plan, life comes along with a thing to do that sidetracks even if the thing is good in itself. But I am starting to get out more and to feel more relaxed about it. My friend likes to go to this warehouse of $1.25 used books and movies. I've been very restrained there and lots of times won't buy anything. But I did find 2 CDs and 2 DVD sets (the latter will probably get watched by me and roommate then re-donated).

The CDs I've been playing while driving, for relaxation. One is music and nature sounds, heavy on the frogs. So most people play rock or country or hip hop, etc. I am driving down the street jamming with my frogs. Lol! Whatever works.

I did my one goal and picked up the packages. I stood in the business for a while and thought about all the years we spent there. Then I stopped to get milk and then I stopped by mom's to talk to one of the aides. So my life doesnt look like it used to. But that's fine.

My goal today is to go pick up my packages. They are still delivered to BF's former business. That's all I have to do to feel like I got outside and actually did something.

Time to go to bed. Need to start dishwasher first. I walked home from work. I changed the litter boxes and got the garbage out. Just need strength to go to bed.

Welcome back, SubC!

Good morning!

Reading, having a lovely time with my family. Will post again some time after they leave tomorrow.

I took a nap out of boredom rather than anyth8ng else. I'm up and showered. I'm running the dishwasher early for me and I'm still cooking my dinner. Such is life. Back to the office on Monday after a week at home.

I might convince myself to go through some of mom's papers tonight. I did wash another dress of hers. A lovely cotton shift from the 1980s I would guess. Very simple and cheerful. It's too tight on me now but I am trying to lose weight again. I will need to modify the tabbed sleeves into 3/4 length sleeves (sorry, SubC that is my preferred length) and then I'll have a nice dress with darts. Normally a shift dress isn't good on my body but this one is delightful. And the fabric is lovely and the bottoms are the fabric covered ones.

Hello hello. I ran my errands and got a walk in. 3 miles between going to the animal shelter and going to the grocery store to get cat litter. I go to the grocery store frequently because I am walking. I've lived this way for nearly 40 years and I enjoy it. Would've liked to have walked closer to five miles but maybe tmr. Or maybe I'll head back out in a while.

I also got the recycling out to the bin.

I will eventually move overseas. I'm thinking about buying a friend's house in Greece. But ultimately that would be more of a vacation place than a year round place, although it does have heating and air conditioning.

I can tell that nearly a year in, our relationship is okay but our lives are taking a different turn. We are living in two different cultures. So we shall see. I'm glad he's establishing himself. He was in Canada for a while and he was despondent. So the Middle East is better for now. Our ultimate plan is France. But who knows what the future holds.

I understand how our stuff is important! I do! It's a comfort to have our stuff and uncomfortable to get rid of it. It's a difficult process. But I promise you it can be done and it can feel good. I used to keep so much stuff because I wanted to be the hero that had whatever anyone needed. I wanted to be able to say, oh I have that, let me get it. And I had to stop being that person and I'm so much happier. Even knowing that the stuff I donated was much better quality than what is available today, I'm grateful that it's gone. Life changing. I'm much happier. But believe me it was hard and scary and sickening and all those things. I felt like I was being punished for abusing my right to own things. And I assure you I still make hard decisions every day and they are each worth it. So stick with it and go your own pace and let us know what you need!

It's a pleasure Tatoulia. :) I can only imagine how difficult a long distance relationship is, especially after not being in a long distance relationship for so long. I'm glad that technology helps - it makes the world feel a bit smaller. Are you considering moving overseas to be with him?

I hope you had a good walk around the city. :)

I can understand running the dishwasher being soothing - I find I'm more rested at night when the dishes are done (even if the dishwasher isn't running), it's just a sense of chores being finished. I like the lamp too. I want to get some lamps for the house, but haven't gotten there yet (and I must get some things out the house before bringing new things in).

I can understand the theory of life being easier with less stuff, but my emotions haven't caught up to that point yet. ;)

I was thinking exactly the same thing, that the kitchen is a good place to start. :) So I'll start there. Half the cupboards in the kitchen are organised (so we can cook) so at least it's not quite as daunting either.

So great that you could freshen up the bathroom quickly - I'm going to remember these tips. I also don't keep anything on the bathroom counter (except the soap) for easy cleaning. How do you keep your white towels white though? I have one set of white towels and the hand towels are starting to have a faint dirty area where hands are dried, and that faint dirty area didn't even come out after soaking in our equivalent of Oxi-Clean.

Hope you had a good dinner. :) Thanks for being here too. :) Glad we can keep each other company while the others are busy.

Alanna, thanks for the well wishes on my BF. We've been together for two decades here in the US and last year he decided to move overseas. It's been hard but technology makes it easy. We are doing our best to be sure.

A friend came into and we walked around the city. I'll take the walk to the animal shelter tomorrow with my sheets.

I run the dishwasher every night. I live alone with my cat and with my mother's cat, who I inherited last year. I have always run the dishwasher every night. I find it soothing. I have a lamp that I turn on in the very small galley apartment kitchen and I find it soothing. Emptying my dishwasher is no longer a chore because I no longer have multiple sets of dishes. And I only have four of each plate. I had some great sets of dishes including some lovely vintage 1950s dishes I bought at a yard sale. And I loved them for years and eventually let go. My life is easier with less stuff.

The chaos of moving and working a lot and feeling overwhelmed is understandable. I would probably start organizing the kitchen cabinets. Not perfect, just get them to fine. You could consider each item as you put it in the cabinet. Would that be a place to start?

Today, I knew my friend was coming over to have a snack and then walk. So as I out the kettle on for my coffee, I ran to the bathroom and changed the towels and opened a new bar of soap. So in those few minutes, I was able to freshen the bathroom. I only use white towels so there's no thought when putting the towels out. I do not keep anything on my bathroom vanity nor do I keep anything on the back of the toilet. So it's a fast bathroom clean up for me.

I'm making dinner now and feeling very hungry. I'll report back soon. Thanks for being here, Alanna!

Hey All :)

Sorry I didn't post the past couple of days - been very hectic with class prep, teaching, and marking.

I'm determined to bring back darts in dresses. I'm rather busty so I look like a sack of potatoes in a dress without darts/some shape. I'll root for long sleeved dresses for you too SubC!

Pity about the emojis, there are some really cute ones nowadays.

What's easy? Dishes are easy, laundry is kinda easy but time consuming (except when there are stains that need scrubbing.). Trash - not so easy because I'm afraid of throwing away something important/that I want so I end up checking the trash before it goes out (weird I know, it's a habit I need to break because it costs a lot of time). Decluttering is hard. I have a backlog of laundry though, which is making that task overwhelming and then I tend to avoid it.

My situation - too much stuff for the space, but we also moved a year and a half ago, and everything moved in chaos, so things need to be organised so that everything has a home. I haven't had time to organise because work got so hectic. Hoarded clutter + moving chaos = a house that looks like the aftermath of an explosion. I need to go through all the cupboards in every room and organise properly. Some cupboards are half organised, there is a room of doom that still has boxes and things in and the garage is still messy as well, although there was some rearranging so that the cars could be parked.

I like your 5 minute miracles Tatoulia, I'm going to remember that. :) I also like SubC's doing a task that you don't have to do again. Although I don't seem to get to those between work and chores.

Tatoulia well done on keeping your house clean and clear. :) And thank you for staying here even though your house is clean to encourage those of us with less clean and clear (read disasters ;) ) houses.

Why is it difficult for me to get rid of things? All of the reasons you mentioned SubC.

Well done on completing your lamp SubC, sounds lovely. :) And well done on getting your trash and recycling dropped off, as well as all the clearing in the garden. Hope you can get your seeds in soon and have some lovely spring flowers.

Sorry you had a headache, I can relate, but glad you could keep up with the dishes and laundry even though it was slow going. Hope the headache is better now.

Enjoy the time with your family SubC, glad you can spend some time with them. :)

Well done on getting the chores done Tatoulia. You're great at getting things done in small gaps of time! That's a skill I need to learn - I waste away the small gaps of time because they seem too short to get things done. Hope you had a good walk to the animal shelter and I'm glad that your old sheets can help some animals in need. :)

Will pray for your BF in the Middle East Tatoulia!

Today I managed to change sheets and wash the sheets and towels. I need to do 1-2 loads of laundry a day until I've caught up. I also did the dishes and the dishwasher is running. Now back to marking.

Have a great day everyone. :)

Hoping your headache eased up, SubC.

I think about how I'm editing my home instead of getting rid of stuff. It's helping me to make some of the harder decisions.

I thought 5 wouldn't come today but here it is. I'm doing to watch the news now. I'm concerned because BF is in the Middle East. I'm concerned for everyone in the region but my concern level is raised because he is there right now. How I miss our old life.

Good morning!

Tatoulia, I hope you have a nice walk.

I may be missing for a bit. I have a lot I need to do for school, I'm trying to get some seeds planted, my spring sale is next weekend, and my parents arrive tomorrow followed by Birdy's family on Sunday. I'm also adding milking back into the chores (happy to have milk!) working on the time management and the internet seems like an obvious place to cut back. I type slowly.

I finished building my lamp sculpture project yesterday. It was too wet to plant in the garden, but I moved some plastic tarps and old trellises. Cleared around my grandmother's lilac bush. I really need to get some seeds in. Had a headache most of the day so I was moving slowly, but I kept up with laundry and dishes.

Did not stop for plastic toys set out with the trash.

Today I was waiting for the oven to preheat so I folded the laundry and put it away. I also got the twin sheets out and one other sheet out to donate. Good feeling. Will walk to the animal shelter this weekend.

Good morning!

Alanna, thank you for the flower. we used to have emojis, but sadly they stopped working a while ago. I teach a range, from 5 to 18throughout the day.

I think a lot of hoarders check - because we are always loosing things. It's also an OCD trait, and OCD is sometimes a companion to hoarding.

On getting rid of things - sometimes it helps if you start by asking why you are afraid of getting rid of things - sentiment? Waste? A fear that you might need it? Also, if you can get rid of something, notice how it is stressful at first, but then over time you don't miss it and perhaps even forget about it.

I miss dresses with long sleeves. I am tall and I hate 3/4 sleeves.

I went straight to the studio from school yesterday and spent over three hours on my lamp. That will have to count as my thing I won't have to do again, because I came home, did chores, and went to bed.

I dropped off trash yesterday, and recycling, but I forgot a bag.

Too many things on my list again today - checking work, lesson prep, garden, and going to the studio to finish my lamp.

Plus a dozen more "if I have time" - I won't have time.
Speaking of, my alarm went off. Time to put the computer down.

Alanna you are such a sweetheart! Yes dresses with darts are a thing of the past, I'm afraid.

How to start? Start with the easy stuff. What is easy for you? Trash? Putting dishes in the dishwasher? What is your situation? Too much of everything? Do you wash laundry and never put it away? What are some habits we can help you form? Getting rid of stuff is like building a muscle so start with the easy stuff and there really is easy stuff. Do you have a lot of coffee mugs? Were some given to you and now you have bad feelings associated with it? Things like that might help spur your creative juices. I remember figuring out that a lamp in my house kept reminding me of a situation that was upsetting to me so I got rid of it.

With respect to time, there are some things that I call five minute miracles. It takes me less than five minutes to empty my dishwasher but I used to put it off.

I have been able to clean and clear my house and keep it that way since 2018. I also have house cleaners once a week so it is always clean top to bottom. I promise you that you will learn to get rid of stuff. Sometimes I say, I loved this and now it's time for someone else to love it.

Emoji failed - that's unfortunate. Dashes in my text flower failed too, so let's try the text flower again: @>- - > - -

Hey All :)

Thank you all so much for the kind welcome. @>—>— (sideways text flower, since I'm not sure if emojis work on the site?) (? attempt at a rose emoji - if it fails, I apologize, thought I'd test and see.)

SubC, I like the poco a poco, I'm going to remember that. :) I teach at a university, so I guess lecturing is a more accurate term, although I have so much in common with teachers. (I have friends who teach, all different ages, and there's always the collective sigh when it comes to marking, as well as the challenges of keeping lessons interesting and students focused.) What ages do you teach? Very interesting about teaching encouraging hoarding - I hadn't thought about that (teachers and lecturers where I'm from also don't get paid that well unfortunately). I've been hoarding for as long as I can remember, so I can't blame my profession unfortunately. ;)

SubC and CM - Haha, I'm actually from sunny Africa (Southern Hemisphere though, hence the opposite seasons). :)

Tatoulia - well done on getting your taxes done. I'm glad your sister encourages you too. A serene house sounds lovely. Rather the opposite of my house. ;)

I like Tatouilia's idea of improving a room every time you go in and I like the time budgeting plan from SubC. Although somehow I always feel like I have too much to do and too little time. Also every time I think a task will take a certain amount of time, it ends up taking three to five times as long. I'm not sure if that's just because I work slowly or because of perfectionist tendencies (probably both).

I totally share your frustrations with fabrics and fits CM and Tatoulia! These frustrations led me to buying a sewing machine and starting to learn how to sew (I'm still very much a beginner though). At least in the fabric store I can choose fabric that I like (some of it feels thicker and good quality but I'm not sure on that) and the sewing patterns have darts. Where I am, it seems as is everyone making dresses or shirts has forgotten what a dart is. Everyone here is buying from very cheap online stores (I think you have them in the USA too, I'm sure you know which ones I'm talking about) but as a hoarder who doesn't get rid of things I can't bring myself to buy cheap stuff that's going to fall apart after the first wash, because then I'd have to get rid of it which is a problem.

CM, did you come right with your costume from Maxine?

Tatoulia, if I was closer (and had time to sew and perhaps a bit more experience), I'd offer to sew you a quilt. (Quilting fabric is lovely and the patterns you can make are stunning.)

Hmm, problems or plans to work on. Plan is to tidy up :-D (not a very helpful plan at this point, I know). Any advice on how to reduce the anxiety associated with getting rid of things? I think that's help me to actually start getting rid of things. I also have a fear of losing things, which ends with me checking and double checking things (e.g. checking that I didn't drop anything when getting out the car). Is that a common hoarding problem or am I just an extreme-hoarder?

Have a great day all. :)

SubC! I'll have to rethink the word minimalist because I don't see myself that way at all. I have lots of stuff but I have pared down dishes and towels etc over the years. I just need fewer things to enjoy the things I do have. Plus I'm looking at my future and what I can realistically take overseas with me. This is super hard but at the same time, the rewards are huge.

Going to hop in the shower and log in to computer. I have a bunch of meetings today.

I appreciate what you stated re time and will go back to read it more. I applaud your efforts to find new methods in structuring your day! And yes on getting rid of the wire! That's a lot of years to deal with something that bugs you. I know because I do it to myself, too.

Tatoulia, you're becom8ng a minimalist!

I'm glad your sister can give you affirmation. Did you get your juice?

I lost a post yesterday too. I am still not working on the clear out, but I am working on the time use, so less time online.

The podcast that got me started on the two minute rule was actually about time management on the homestead. I am also working on her main system. To try to be brief - she drew parallels to financial budgeting for goals.

1) Know all your tasks and goals and how you use your time (track expenses and expenditures) she suggested writing everything down that you do for a week which made me laugh. I would spend so much time writing! Not doing that right now. Am trying to pay attention.

2) allow 12 hours for sleep and activities you have to do again every day (meals, personal hygiene, exercise, chores (household and homestead)

3) subtract the hours you spend on your job and commute (2+3= "fixed expenses"

4) take ten percent of the time remaining and "pay yourself first" block that time off for tasks that you will not have to do again - that will advance your goals and/or save you time and/or money. (That is your savings/investment)

#4 is the part I am looking at right now. I think it applies to any project or goal, (like dehoarding!) not just building a homestead) You can "time budget" by day , or week, or month.

Again, I am not ready to work the full system, but I did the math, and by day, days I work that 10% is 20 minutes. So I am going to try to put 20 minutes those days into work that I won't have to do again (counting making pottery for sale because even though I will make pottery again, each piece I finish is finished and will hopefully move me forward financially.) not counting lesson plans because I don't repeat them enough year to year to save time.

I am also trying to do something in category 4 every day. Yesterday I took down the last of the barbed wire Dh convinced me to put up 20 years ago. It has been an annoyance almost from day 1.

Ok, time's up.

Hi everyone! I wrote a post earlier today but lost it as I'm not used to my new iPhone yet. I'll get there. I don't use all the features but my old one was no longer holding a charge.

I know exactly what you mean re the fabrics, CM. I am trying to replace my nearly 30 year old thin cotton quilt (it is in tatters) and I cannot find what I want. Even the ones claiming to be cotton are of such poor quality and they put a sheen on it or otherwise treat the fabric. Other cotton looks like it will pull or pill quickly. I just want a decent thin white quilt. It's absolutely impossible to find stuff that isn't junk and cheaply made. I buy very expensive pjs because all the stuff in the stores are garbage. But they will last me forever and a day and so I'm all set in that department.

SubC I have a friend who, upon leaving a room, looks around to see what she can do to improve it. Coincidentally with your experimentation with the two minute rule, I've been trying the method of improving every time I go from one room to the next. I'm trying to form a habit. I'm so grateful that your husband could see the progress!!!

Okay 7 PM and I have the choice of running to the store to get some much needed fruit juice or just sitting here and continuing to work. Cat is on my lap which makes the decision even harder.

My sister said she's getting rid of stuff and once again mentioned how calm and serene my house is. What a compliment! And something that I have to live up to for sure.

I have sheets for my foldout since it is a smaller size than my bed (foldout is a twin because I do not want people staying here). I've decided to take the twin sheet set to the animal shelter and if someone wants to stay, we will make my sheets fit for the night or two. No need to keep them.

Good morning.

CM, I am proud of you that you are still swimming. I hope you find a new suit.

Tatoulia, I'm glad you got your taxes done. Hopefully the unexpected income was worth the extra taxes and didn't just push you over into a different bracket where you came out behind.

I am probably staying home today, but we'll see how the weather turns out. I may go into the downtown studio.

I didn't post about this, but on Sunday morning I was experimenting with a task system based on the 2 minute rule. The idea was to clear your head of all the silent to do list and be able to plan and organize your life. So as you go through your day, you carry a notepad. If you see or think of a task - if it takes less than 2 minutes, you do it. If it takes more you write it down. I started in my great room (open living/dining/kitchen area) which is the most organized and cleaned up space in my house. I ended up with along list (mostly of random thoughts that are not tasks in the great room) but also spent over two hours just completing "two minute" tasks (defined by me as "I can do this right now and it won't take very long", not strictly two minutes). After which I could see basically no difference, but apparently Dh could see a lot. So what I learned from this is that if a job takes less than two minutes, I don't usually even see it.

Anyway, I plan to do that for another 30 minutes this morning.

But also I have a list of 20 things that are not 2 minute tasks - so clearly, I won't finish that.

Hi all, welcome Alanna. Do you come from a land down under perhaps? ;) Sorry, couldn't resist, and there is no pressure to answer my silly question/song lyrics. We're glad to have you.

Went swimming this afternoon. Still wearing my tired old saggy baggy suit. A friend has offered to buy me one as a gift but we've needed to coordinate on the logistics of that, since she is out of state, and originally we thought I'd try something on in a brick and mortar store, forward her the info, then she'd order the same thing online and have it shipped to me. Now I have exhausted the brick and mortar stores here, whose selection was paltry. There used to be more stores I could have checked but you know how a lot of them have closed in these times we live in. I did find an online source, Maxine, that has suits that look like the current one which has fit pretty well and lasted. Someone passed it on to me a decade or so ago and it's not a Maxine label but I wonder if it was made by them or they bought out the original company, etc.

I dread the process of acquisition of clothing items more and more. Between my weight and sensory issues and the way clothing manufacturers don't make much that I like, and money concerns, it's a chore. But I've griped about that already. I like to find something I feel good in and get several in different colors and be done with it. Not too many, though. I don't want excess. It's hard to balance. Well, hoping the swimsuit quest anyway will wrap up successfully fairly soon.

We are supposed to get some strong thunderstorms tonight. We need the rain. We don't need hail, high winds, or tornadoes.

Welcome, Alanna! Glad you are here! And so kind!

Taxes done and paid. I owed a lot this year. Generally I'm pretty even. But I had some unexpected income.

Now I'll read the posts! Sorry to scare you, SubC

Tatoulia, I am worried. Taxes are due today!

Welcome Alanna! We all start where we start and make progress at the rate we can. The important thing is starting and not giving up. As our dear CM reminds us - poco a poco - little by little we make it better.

Class prep and marking! Another teacher. Do you mind sharing anything about what (ages/subjects) you teach?

I am also curious about which continent you are on.

I think teaching (at least in the US) encourages hoarding because we never have any money for class supplies and are always looking for creative alternatives, scrounging free supplies, and saving stuff that might be useful.

Do you have a plan we can help you with? Or a problem are you want to tackle?

Hey All :)

I'm new to posting here, although I've been ghost reading this thread for a little while to get to know everyone. I hope you don't mind me posting on this thread - I read on someone else new's thread that this was the place to post.

While I'm new to posting here, I am not new to hoarding... I found this thread when looking for help/support/advice on hoarding. Google is full of information on what hoarding is but nothing on how to reduce/get rid of the anxiety associated with parting with possessions. I'm also from another part of the world (proof that hoarders are found all over ;)), so I hope you don't mind me joining in from across the planet.

Reading all your posts is inspiring and a little overwhelming at the same time. You all are doing so much and making good progress with cleaning up. I think I'm a little behind in my mental state - just the thought of getting rid of things induces much stress and anxiety.

CM - happy birthday for the 11th (assuming my calculations are correct - not sure if the site accounts for time zone differences). Hope you enjoyed the nursery, spring flowers are lovely and cheerful. :) (It's fall where I am, so everything going into Autumn colours and getting colder.)

Lila - I'm sorry to hear about your health, I hope you feel better soon. Yay for the new shirt though, it sounds beautiful (I love blue and white combo, it's a classic). I agree with SubC's suggestion of moving ex's things onto the driveway and locking your garage and storeroom if that's possible (not sure how much stuff ex has).

SubC - sorry to hear the baby goat died, but I'm glad Jane is doing well. Farm life sounds very interesting. :) I'm glad you found your green scarf too. I love scarves and probably have more than what I should, but I enjoy them.

Tatoulia - well done on making the hard decisions, I know how stressful those can be! It sounds like you're making good progress (and Emiko sounds like wonderful help to you). Hope the taxes are done.

Have a good day all. I was hoping to get some laundry done today but I don't feel I have the energy. I also have class preparation that needs to happen and marking to do.

I am glad ex is coming to get his stuff, Lila. It may be a hard day for you and certainly anxious as the day approaches but hopefully you will feel relief and will feel lighter!

Yay for the springy blouse! I bet you looked nice in it!

Glad you found the green scarf and put it where you can find it, SubC.

I have so many clothes that would fit me (not many by other people's standards) if I would just get serious about it.

Might do my taxes now.

Yay Tatoulia!

Lila :)

I am so glad you have a new shirt! Yay for the new shirt! If anybody ever does say anything mean, you just remember that you got compliments and they have no fashion sense.

Would it be possible to put ex's junk in the driveway and lock the house and garage? Or is the storage room just too overwhelming? Can your boys be there with you when he comes? Will the storage room be empty after this?

We had fun with our friends. I am tired. I wore my favorite dress and my green fake pashmina scarf that I couldn't find at first in my closet and got frustrated. Dh said "you know, we can buy you some clothes." I told him I want to lose x more pounds and then I will clean out my closet and probably buy some clothes. Maybe. I took all the scarves off hangers and tossed them in a basket and when I got home I put just the green one on the fancy multi scarf hanger and hung it up. When I wear another one, I will hang that up.

Very tough decisions were made.

hello! Happy birthday CM! I too read that book in hgih school and loved it. As a child I also loved Terhune books, esp Lad the collie books.

SubC, you are doing lots. Jane Doe? Cute :)

Tatoulia, it sounds like a lot to deal with. I never dealt with much when my parents died. Mom inherited Dad's, and then Mom left everything to her church and I got nothing and had no say. I did have a very nice aunt who felt bad for me and helped me purchase a few things from the estate sale.

Worked yesterday and today. You guys I did a new thing. This morning I did, actually, a daring thing. I pulled out a new shirt I bought over a year ago and have never worn because it is not "my usual." It is light blue with small white flowers and sort of peasant style sleeves. I pulled it out and put it on and in my head I am thinking, I wonder if that guy (the one who made fun of my sweater way back) will say something about this... what could he say? Does this look silly on me? I always want to wear basic plain dark colors to fade into the background.

But I wore it and felt good in it and even got a compliment on it. So I will add it into the rotation. I need to decide which things I will add in and which I never will, and cull those out.

I have much I want to do but don't know how to do it because I feel like I need help. I need a load to go to the dump (TotsDad), I want other Son to clean up the dog yard and mow, I want a clean house but I am so tired all the time.

Also my ex the hoarder says he is coming to get his junk with a moving van in 3 weeks. Wow. I am nervous because I don't want him to take any of MY stuff.. I probably will need to go in the garage and storage room and make doubly sure anything of mine that he could be prone to take is put away in my bedroom (he is not coming in here). Another thing to do that is kind of stressful. I need TotsDad to move some things before I can do that, and for ex to be able to get his junk.

Today looks like a beautiful day here, too! The boston marathon is tomorrow and I hope the nice weather will continue. It will be hard on me without BF by my side as I cheer on the runners but I prefer to do this alone rather than with others. Next year. I also took myself to the theatre Friday night and had a wonderful time. I enjoy going by myself and did even when BF was here. Living so close makes it easy to just pop over.

The marathon will not be as much fun without BF but it still will be fun and I need to get over the hurdle of having him gone. It will be easier on me.

I have a zip car for a few hours today so I need to stock up on seltzer. Trying to make a bag for goodwill. Anything to keep moving forward and gaining more space.

Will report back later!

Good job Tatoulia!

But do your taxes!

My life is pretty cool. - lol.

Last night I stayed up too late reading online which was a bad choice. Also, there was something in the news that was heartbreaking for someone I know (which is as much as I can say online out or respect for privacy)

This morning I am cleaning up loose ends, doing laundry and dishes and prepping for the week. Dh and I are going into the city for entertainment and dinner with friends (in that order, so hopefully it won't be a late night) after lunch.

It's gorgeous weather again, and I really want to work outside, but there isn't really enough time to get into anything before I would have to clean up.

Hi everyone and thank you for the encouragement. I'm making really tough decisions here. Getting rid of the stuff is a weight lifted off of me.

SubC, there was no estate of my mother's, so to speak. She owes some money to her assisted living and technically it's not my responsibility but I'll pay it. They were very good to her and I'm not going to quibble. They used up her deposit. I think it's likely the charge for all the furniture that I couldn't move. Who knows.

I have more things to get rid of. This is a lot of work. But I value my space more.

Lila you own a lot of clothes! Start wearing them and see how you feel! I'm so sorry about your eye issue and the UTI. No fun.

SubC I am fascinated by your life.

Cm, it does sound like you had a happy birthday!

U had Emiko over for dinner tonight for her birthday and then I did her taxes. I still have to do mine.

I did a lot of errands today and I'm really proud of myself.

Happy birthday, CM!!!!!

The baby girl is doing great. I have named her Jane.

Today I cleared off the hay rack, completely cleaned all the composted deep bedding out of the corner stall, picked up a truckload of hay and a truckload of straw, found a "new" heavy gate chain so I could hang a water bucket on the light one I was using even though it wasn't strong enough, set up the stall and moved the moms and babies into it.

I also moved a piece of semi-mobile (too heavy) fence to close off the area outside of the chicken coop, opened the trapdoor for the chickens (who have only been able to go out through the sliding barn door into another area) and worked on cleaning out the chicken coop. (The chicken coop is really bad and it is a multi day job that gets worse again in between. There are so many layers of muck and clean straw because I never have time to get all the way done.)

Very tired and sore.

Good morning.

Ah yes, James Herriot and his cautionary tales.. Loved them, failed to learn from them and so got a farm anyway.

The goat I thought had another week or three to go had her babies last night. The boy was tiny and had no muscle tone and even though I brought him in and dried him off and gave him supplements and a cozy bed in front of the heater, he never swallowed and died in his sleep. (Baby goats have about 12 hours to stand and eat or they don't make it) Herriot never wrote those stories.

I have not been out yet this morning to check on his sister, (Sister! - I forgot they also come in mixed sets) but momma was showering her with love last night and she looked ok. I'm still too tired to face any other possibility.

So I think kidding is over. Pansy could still surprise me up until June, but I put her on the stand last night and checked again, and still don't feel anything but soft goat belly.

CM, happy birthday! have fun at the nursery. Don't buy work.

The studio where I am taking my class - my "community" studio, is an hour away. - it's only twelve minutes from my job and seven from my grandson's house. Sadly there is a lot of
City, suburb, and farmland between.

Lila, I hope your eye gets better quickly. Maybe something scratched it? You are getting a lot done. In spite of all your health challenges.

I pet the baby goats twice a day even on work days.

Clothes - I have done the turn your hangers back wards thing, but don't know if I will follow through. My clothes don't really fit my life. (Or my body right now) can you gather up all of your work shirts, pick your ten favorite (that is still a lot) and donate the rest to a place that provides clothes to people who need nice clothes for interviews and work?

I remember how hard it was to get rid of all of my "teacher dresses" but where I work now, I teach in jeans and a school shirt.

Jars? The glaze from the other thread? This week I bought a $4 pint of stuff that makes it easy to remix the glaze (think "I realized I'm never going to make this fancy cake from scratch so I bought a cake mix") and hopefully that will help me empty some of them out. Then they will get reused for other pottery materials (a few) or recycled (most) I also got more gloss white. So now I will probably find the other jar(s). I estimate 2-5 years if I just remix the glaze when I need it.

Today it is not supposed to rain, so I need to go work my butt off in the barn.

SubC, your post about the goats brings back memories. I have been a fan of veterinarian author James Herriot (All Creatures Great and Small series) since high school and I remember from the books - there was a chapter about lambing, with a bit about a large single lamb being harder to deliver. And a set of quadruplet lambs, and various other events. Time for a reread of those books one of these days. I introduced my roommate to the TV show too, two or three years ago. With Christopher Timothy, Robert Hardy, and Peter Davison (who was also the 5th Doctor Who) whom we met in 2016 at a con. Sorry for rambling but nostalgia hit me hard there, lol!

How far is your studio? I want to get back to my painting someday along with everything else. The days are longer and maybe I could paint out on the patio, before bugs get bad. If not painting right away, perhaps some drawing.

Lila, I sure hope you feel better soon. You're still getting a lot done, and pushing forward despite many obstacles.

Tatoulia, you are getting a lot done too, and it's a series of big decisions and logistics involved. That takes energy!

My birthday was yesterday. A semi milestone, 62 (!) in that there are a few options that open up although not all ones that I would be in a position to take. More housing options but I'm not ready to make a change yet. Could convert disability to retirement but the staggering cut it would entail makes that a non starter as well. Only if I also married a rich man would that work, and if I found one, it wouldn't matter either way, as long as he was nice and we both had good health etc. But dreams aside, I had a nice day. Went to church for a little prayer time in the chapel, met up at the coffeehouse with a lady from my Bible study, and roommate took me to dinner later and I had a tasty steak, potato, salad and fruit, and cake.

It's getting warmer again here, sometimes windy, other times reasonable. Still not consistent as far as temperatures. But then no need to rush right into too hot of weather. The flowering trees are giving way to leaves, but not all trees are leafed out. Bedding plants are being sold. Roommate and I and a couple other friends are going to plant nurseries tomorrow. I mainly just look, because I don't have a lot of extra time for gardening. But it's fun to see the pretty flowers.

hello friends! After 5 days of work I am back, with a day off. I work tomorrow and all week until next Friday.

Tatoulia, hugs for your very hard thing. I am sorry you had to go through it. We care about you. You mentioned the car being gone is better for your mental health. That got me thinking, what do I have that, if it was gone, would be better for my mental health? My answer as of right now is - clothes, kids' clothes, unused toys. I have massive guilt around those items.

Even today I went in my closet looking for something to wear on my day off. I have 4 certain comfy shirts for days off but all were dirty from a mishap I won't recount. As I looked through no less than 2 dozen shirts hanging in my closet, I thought "that's too nice, this is a work shirt, this would be a good work shirt, this looks too nice to wear around the house, what if I stain it, " etc etc. Silly. I finally settled on a short I used to wear for work but it is plain and just a 3/4 sleeve tee and there is no reason not to wear it. Honestly most of what is in the closet never gets worn at all. I wear the same 5 things to work pretty much every week. But I feel traumatized if I think about getting rid of anything.

SubC, what will you do with all the jars? I hope you are having some enjoyment of the baby goats. I read your posts and had other comments but forgot so forgive me!

CM I hope you are doing well, I also read your post and forgot what I wanted to say. My brain is terrible.

I have pain in my right eye as if there is something stuck under the upper eyelid. It has been like this all week but I can't see anything in there, I have rinsed many times with the artificial tears rinse, and my eye is not red or even pink. I could not get an appt til Monday. It burns most of the time and hurts when I blink. I don't know what to make of it. I also have a UTI and am on antibiotics... again! ugh

Today I:
- unloaded the dishwasher
- loaded the dishwasher
- hand washed some dishes
- got all the spoiling stuff out of the fridge
- ordered groceries and got them all put away
- gathered 3 bags of trash and had Son take them out before the trash truck came
- put in two loads of laundry, mostly my clothes
- put one load in the dryer. Working on the rest
- cooked a meal from a kit someone gave me, which was very tasty
- did quite a bit of Bible reading and study
- watched an explanatory video on one of the Bible books I was reading
- listened to a podcast a friend sent me

Wow, look at that. I did not totally waste my day like I thought!

What are you all doing today?

More twin bucklings!

Momma has a nice udder though, and they are up and have had their first meal. She's a first fresher, so I'm very pleased with her.

Useless is letting me down though (on gender)
My kidding preference in order:

Twin doelings
Triplet doelings
Single doelings
Twin bucklings
Single buckling
Triplet bucklings

(Odd numbers are always more of a challenge and single bucklings can be huge and create birthing issues)