~Greetings to all!~
Joan, i thought of you this morning after reading something on the internet by a government whistleblower....wow?! There is so much going on that is quite frightening....my only way to offset it is through getting back to natural living & lots of visualization & grounding(barefoot) & sending light to the pineal gland! I hear you about judging ourselves about our homes. That is one of my biggest challenges!
Tillie, the weather where you are is crazy?!! Im glad you made it back ok! Driving in freeway rush hour is one of the scariest things i ever have to do! Good for you to take the reins & get home in the right direction!
Tatoulia, you are such an amazing & wonderful person! You do so much & are so nurturing & so wise! Please dont beat yourself up? And im still staying very sure of wanting a relationship like yours...i think about it a lot & i dont want anything less! Ill never do that needy, controlling, possessive guy thing again!!! Ive gotten so much clearer on that because of you! Thank you! :D
My trailer looks like its wearing a fringe jacket with the tattered tarp...ha ha As far as a vacuuming update; the wind has been too strong to change the bag outside, until today, so im going to do that & hopefully vacuum today!
Ive been clearing weeds & raking barefoot paths! ....i know the inside is what needs work, tho...its almost like working outside is a reward for having worked on the inside some.......some of these words were suppose to type in at the bottom are really hard to see the whole word...?!?
~♡~Happy endeavours to you all!~♡~

Good Morning Everybody :)
Glad to read you are all hanging in there and still doing things that make your home lives a little better.

SubC and Joan, thank you for your support. Joan I know how hard it is for you to post and am delighted that you read the posts! I value your guidance. SubC, thank you for your loving and thoughtful suggestions. I do need to be good to myself.

I changed my sheets last night, did two loads of laundry, showered and replaced the fabric in the seat of my desk chair. It looks really nice. It is the fabric that my designer friend picked out for my desk chair (great grandmother's) and my two dining room chairs. My "dining room" is actually a bay window with an arch and columns. I can fit two armless-chairs and one chair with arms in the space. My table has hidden leaves, so when I do holiday dinners, I pull the table out into the middle if the room, extend it and reconfigure my furniture into the bay window. At Christmas I put the gifts in the bay and before I had the kitty I used to put a Christmas tree in there. I think I'll be getting rid of the chair with arms. I had two but gave one away and I think I'll give away or consign the other one. I'll have to give this some thought. I'll see what my designer says, as I will need chairs if I'm going to be having dinners here again. with mom in a wheelchair she won't be able to come here again, which is a shame because I know she'd love to see the changes going on.

I am doing better so far today, with your help and support. Thank you so much. You are good friends.

Tat, don't worry, I don't feel snubbed. People cannot always remember me when I don't post. I go through long periods when it is just too difficult for me to post, or sometimes even keep up with reading postings.

Did you have a big upset over something? It sounds like you are having a crisis of some kind.

I am OK. Had to bring the car in for work this week, so had my hands full. Everyone keep up the good work! There are so many challenges in life. Cultivating a nonjudgmental attitude is one of the best investments we can make. It begins at home, with no judgement towards ourselves. When I get closer to seeing what is going on in a nonjudgmental way, the issues clarify and often self-resolve.

Wishing everyone the best.

Tatoulia, when I have times like that, I have to remind myself that I am sick. That just because what is going on in my body doesn't respond to antibiotics and is mostly in my nervous system and chemical balance instead of my digestive system or sinuses, doesn't mean I am not sick.

Sometimes I will cancel things and tell people I am sick and if they ask what kind if sick, I say "the kind where you can't leave the house and you don't want to discuss the details." Which is true but they always assume I have a digestive problem.

You have been doing amazingly well lately. When you have a big sustained effort like the drapes and the rug! It is not unusual to crash afterwards.

Treat yourself gently. If you had a severe case of the flu, you would not expect yourself to keep up with your life. Is the kitty fed? Are you hydrated? Bathing regularly might also make you feel better, but if it doesn't it's ok to spend a couple days in the same pajamas. Really.

If you are doing better than that then give yourself credit, ok?

All I did for solstice this year was light candles and put out an apple for the deer. Because that was all I had energy for. And that is ok. You have to do the best you can where you are and remember to treat yourself the way you would treat the people you love.

Thinking about everyon else and the bunnies and the astonishingly variable weather!

My dear Joan--I just wanted to send you my regards! Did not mean to leave you out of my last post. I am struggling with frustration, self/loathing and a bunch of other negative stuff and I would never snub you!

I am working through this. It's just very hard. I'm trying to eat better and get physical activity and stay hydrated etc etc and still I'm just so upset. ThAnk you all for your kind words and thoughts and please forgive me for being so negative. I'm struggling.

Hello everyone! Great to read your posts and glad that everyone's on the mend (SubC & Bunny!) and that everyone else is well (Tillie, Tess, Anony, CM). I am hanging on by a thread. Will write more later.

Good Afternoon Everyone :)

Hi CriticalMass :)
The bunny will definitely appreciate all your efforts to make it easier for her to get around.
Have you tried gentle massage for her? It really helps animals just as much as it helps humans.
P.S. sent some of your heat this way and I will send some of my cold your way.
Then we both will have perfect weather. ;)

Slept very well last night and wanted to sleep in past 6:00am but I was so cold & shivering that I finally gave up and got up.
28 degrees is freakin cold! :O
Got a lot of little things finally accomplished around here that I had been wanting to get to.
Got out my wool blanket and a fiber filled comforter for the bed too.
Supposed to warm up back into the 80s later this week.
I sure do hope we get Autumn weather for 3 months before we get the Winter stuff.

Hope you are all doing well (((HUGS)))

Well, we had a lovely crisp cool first day of autumn here - NOT! Still in the mid 90s and sticky as Anony's honey.

But it could be a lot worse, could be in Texas, Florida, Mexico, or Puerto Rico. Feel terrible for those folks. :(

Lots of good posts again I want to reply to but it's late and the heat has sapped my energy so I'll make a more detailed post later. I did get my quilt corner squares all cut to size without butchering any of them. Tomorrow I hope to sew.

Counting the days till the cool front arrives and we should see a 20 degree drop at least. Then it will feel like fall. The squirrels are madly dashing around, and unfortunately quite a few of them have met an untimely demise on the streets. Sad to see; I like the little critters.

Bunnies are holding their own. "Granddaughter" bunny looks improved but we're going to have to engineer some handicap accessibility for her with the gimpy leg. Hoping we can help her regain better function in it, but at least for the short term she needs to be able to get around without hazards or strain. My "daughter" bunny's feet continue to improve.

Good night for now! (Still sleeping on the couch and having better sleep.)

Hello Everybody :)
I'm Back!

Hi Tess :)
WAY TO GO!!!! for making your OWN coffee! :D
I allow myself a Starbucks chai about once every five years, whenever I'm in the city and decide to splurge.
Great that you're changing decluttering from a chore into self care.
It really is the best way to make sure you are taking care of yourself.
We'll talk about that shopping to relax later.

Hi Anonymoniker :)
Good luck with your new plan to clean up the honey.
Don't let backsliding get you down, just accept it happened and carry on. (((HUGS)))

Hi Subclinical :)
Glad you are feeling better. :D
I actually saw a 4 legged chick somewhere on Youtube. LOL
Rest well tonight (((HUGS)))


Got home a bit before 3:00.
It's 50 degrees outside and was 62 degrees inside.
It was snowing on all the mountains and higher foothills and raining down here.
Steven is the WORST back seat driver and had me driving in circles in horrible traffic for an hour.
Finally I stopped and told him to stop flipping around and yelling out orders to me.
Then I went ahead with my plan and got right back on the right highway headed in the right direction for home.
He actually admitted I was right all along.
I want to smack him but I am not a violent person.
Got home and got out a heater, it's now 67 in here.
Made myself a fried egg sandwich.
Now maybe I can relax. :D

Tillie, waiting to hear how you are!

Tess, your changes sound delightful. Someday I am going to have a built in bookshelf with a window seat on one wall of the guest bedroom. My dd drew it for me for my birthday a few years ago (she has an architecture degree).

Same Dd used to talk to herself as different people: "oh my gosh, I need my swim stuff and I am in such a hurry - hey! It's all packed! Thanks past me!" Or "Ok, all the ski stuff is clean and folded and put away. You're welcome future me."

So I think looking at taking care of your home as something you are doing for yourself is brilliant.

Anony, I hope you get your billboard tarp! I have a friend who used to put up billboards and they would let him keep the ones he took down sometimes. He built a tent shed for his pig out of them. It worked great and lasted for years. They were mostly beer and whiskey adds, so he joked that the pig thought it lived in a bar.

I am feeling much better. The cooking class sent me homemade humus this afternoon and I ate it with only a few moments of uncertainty. It was drenched in garlic too. So if I'm actually ill the garlic should help!

Then I had a piece of pizza (homemade, my goat cheese) for dinner. I'm still very tired, but I expect to get my feet under me tomorrow.

The chickens were a big hit at school. We talked about how they hatch and what they eat and weighed the chicks and worked on our observation skills, and I only had one student draw a chicken with four legs.

~Happy Hello to all!~
Tillie, i hope you are safely back home by now? Im so sorry he sprung that on you like that?! It seems like i remember a while back, you saying you ended up getting more anxious & stressed out in anticipation of trips when you knew ahead of time? Is it possible he did it that way so you didnt spend days worrying? If not then itd seem deliberate on his part...either way, im so sorry?!
Tatoulia, i hope the sleep has restored you back to your strong self again?!
Tess, coffee at home with a nice cozy ready corner sounds like a fantastic addition! YEA!
SubC, i hope youre feeling better by now? Often, the cleaner our diets get, the less we can tolerate unhealthy foods. Im so amazed at how much you already do, PLUS this new challenge?! Good job!
CM, are you familiar with (food grade)diatomatous earth for fleas? Its not toxic like most flea powders & its cheap. It can also be used internally for parasites & many other health issues!
Well, i worked on the honey mess yesterday. Honey is not like any other substance on the planet! Im gonna try a new plan today.
The tarp is now just shading most of the side with the inside of the wall exposed. Im gonna leave it until the sun starts easing up in strength for the fall. The part exposed is not geared for UV rays. Its the black garbage bag type plastic filled with insulation that is what is showing outside now, just to be clearer about that. Im sorry to have made it sound worse than it is. Im gonna go ahead & get a better tarp made for billboards!
I have backslid in things here & i definitely feel worse because of it....but, the little bit that i regain helps me feel a lot better! ~♡~

Hi all!

I haven't posted in a couple days, but I've been moving forward.

One thing I've learned about myself is that I'm easily overwhelmed. Between my job (stressful!), family issues (ugh!), everything happening in the world and my mess, sometimes all I can do is come home and veg. I do a lot of "self-care" in the form of spa treatments, shopping trips (yikes!), and drinks with my girls. It just hasn't been cutting it lately. Starting this cleaning project again had made me feel better than I've felt in a long time. So, I've decided to approach it as self-care rather than chores.

I hoard books. Reading is my #1 hobby and always relaxes me. In the name of self care, I created a little reading corner for myself. I cleared a corner, bought a new bookshelf and added a chair. My ultimate goal is to turn my spare room into a library, but this will do for now. Progress, not perfection.

My morning coffee is also important to me. I have been rushing to Starbucks or the corner store every morning. That meant getting dressed and interacting with people BEFORE coffee! It's also expensive. I like to have my coffee in peace and solitude before my day starts. So, I bought a new coffee pot and created a coffee station. I'm currently drinking my coffee in my reading corner. Happy day!

After work, I plan to do some work in my bedroom. My goal is to clear all clutter from the view of the bed. I want the bedroom to be serene. I'm hoping this will help me sleep better.

Tillie - drive safe today! I'm sure you and his stupid eyes will be fine. Lol! Seriously, stay safe

Subclinicam - I'm sorry you're not feeling well. Take it easy for a couple days

Tatoulia - 14 lbs is amazing! Congrats! How did you do it? Now that I'm back to cooking at home, I hope I see a few pounds melt away

Good Morning Everybody :)

Hi Subclinical :)
Hope you feel better soon (((HUGS)))
You are still doing good on your challenge!
It gets hard at times when "life" keeps getting in your way. ;)

Well, I am up and getting ready to leave soon.
Drinking my tea "CLINK!"
Need to make sure the cats have what they need.
Shut and lock all the windows.
Make sure everything is turned off.
Wish me luck and if I don't post again it's because some idiot crashed into the car and killed me.
It will probably be some drunk driver because I never drink alcohol and there are lots of drunks driving in Nevada.
Sorry to be so negative (((HUGS)))

I think I might be sick. I get sick very rarely, so I'm not sure yet. It has been a very stressful week at work. My neck has been stiff from the tension since Wednesday night and this led into a mild headache. Last night I was completely exhausted. This morning my digestive system is doubtful.

But, dh cooked dinner last night and I realized afterwards that he grilled the fennel in "his" cast iron pan. I don't clean "his" pan because he complains that I scrub all the seasoning off. He uses it to cook meat. I don't eat meat. A few years ago I accidentally ate four potato chips cooked in lard and they did the same thing to my digestive system. So.... maybe animal fat?

I have to go to work today. There is no sub plan for my lessons. I'm bringing the chickens. (If it gets really bad I can get someone else to cover once the chickens are there.)

Tillie, I'm sorry Steven expects you to drive. And how rude to wake you up! Those drops wear off after a few hours. Maybe he could just sit in the parking lot.

CM, I'm sorry it is so hot, and I hope the bunny gets better! It's exciting that you found your quilt fabric though.

Tatoulia, how are you today?

I am calling last night the 20th day of my challenge, even though I forgot to take the compost out and there were half a dozen things waiting for the next dishwasher load. The compost was all fresh. Also, dh plopped his lunch box down on the counter after I started the dishwasher.

I am still throwing away feed bags.

Hello Everybody :)

Hi Tatoulia :)
A bag a week is a good goal.
It's not too overwhelming and keeps you moving toward your goal. :)
WTG! for that impressive weight loss! (((hugs)))

Hi Subclinical :)
Your pantry challenge is a great idea!
Just make sure to post your successes here.

Hi CriticalMass :)
Give the bunny and kitty a gentle hug for me.
YEA! for finding the perfect fabric for your quilt! :D

warning, rant ahead...
Last evening Steven woke me up to inform me that I would have to drive to Reno Friday because he has an appointment and the Dr. "may" dilate his stupid eyes.
He has known about this appt. for a long time but waited to tell me.
Anyways, I slept badly last night and spent almost all day today napping off and on.
I'm exhausted and extremely depressed and nervous.
I will be in fine form for a long highway drive topped off with crazy insane bumper to bumper rush hour freeway traffic. >:O

Whew, it's been kind of crazy. Some good, some stressful things going on.

I hope I can get my things from the van into storage
so I can be ready to help with the other lady's project on Monday. The weather here is not helping - very HOT and windy. High of 94 yesterday, 96 today, a couple more 90s days to endure. Yuck. Then it will storm and by Tuesday be in the 70s. And it sure does get dark a lot earlier now!

I'm out with the kittysitting kitties. They have been good except the younger male has this annoying habit of ambushing and nipping the back of my calves! He got me again today. But he's a likeable fellow otherwise, so I can forgive that little quirk.

The two cats at home have been tense off and on for awhile; last night a skirmish broke out in the other room. I inspected girl cat and she cried when I touched a spot by her hip. No broken skin but boy cat must've bruised her. Don't know what gets into them.

My "granddaughter" bunny, who belongs to my roommate and is the offspring of a female bunny I lost a few years back, is having trouble. Prayers appreciated for her. She still has a few fleas, her leg arthritis is really bothering her, and she's lost some weight. I've got some TLC things to do for her though. She seemed better this morning because I flea combed her late into the night. Don't know if she's up to flea meds - for sure we'd need to weigh her and be careful of the dosage. There weren't many live fleas, but a lot of flea poop. Sigh. I hate it when life gets too busy and things like this creep up and then suddenly boom, they're a big problem.

On the way out here to friends' kitties I went to that 3rd quilt shop and found my perfect border fabric. It was more pricey but it went with my theme and was the color I wanted. It should really make the quilt "pop." Binding fabric I'll find later and it should be easier. The border one is yellow, and I'm thinking blue for binding. Now to final trim the little squares and start sewing, and prewash the new fabric!

Tatoulia, hope you can shake those blues soon. It can take time. Sounds like you have a plan though - that's a good start.

Thank you for your kind words, SubC! How about you stick with your 100 day kitchen challenge and post about it? That would be very helpful for me!

Have a great day, everyone. I'm still feeling not like myself and hoping that going to work today will help. It will help or hurt/I'm not sure which.

It was busy here yesterday!

Anony, I too imagined your roof caving in, so I am glad that is not the case and you have some time to work on your solution. I still want you to have a place to live that makes you feel good though - safe and happy and homey.

CM, what a wonderful boost to be able to offer your van to help! You should be really proud of yourself. Enjoy your kitty and sewing time.

Tillie, I'm so glad things went ok at the dentist! Of course you needed a long nap - that sort of thing is emotionally exhausting. I hope you feel rested today.

Tatoulia, 14 lbs is a lot! My weight won't budge these days - it goes down a couple of pounds and then right back up. I've just started adding my exercise routine back into my week, but it's going to get derailed next week for substituting.

I'm sorry you are feeling down about your place. I'm usually up for a challenge, but I have so many changes going on right now I'm afraid to think of a new one. I'm still doing the 100 day thing with the other group, plus trying to exercise and it is only week three of school and my schedule there hasn't settled down yet. Combined with goals I set for my pottery and the new throwing away feed bags rule....

I could do my pantry. I can't do a bag a week, but every week I could clear something out of my pantry by planning a meal to use it up or taking it to the food bank. (Or maybe throwing it out or to the chickens, some of it is probably expired) Would that help?

Tillie you are such a dear heart. You are so great. I'm glad you made it through the appt today.

I think I should challenge myself to one bag a week. That always feels good--one bag a week to go to goodwill. I would love something more productive such as a cleaning challenge but the way I feel right now, I'd be more comfortable purging and I think it's doable. Anyone have a challenge they'd like to do so we can do together??!!??

I was able to fit into a skirt today that I haven't been able to fit into in quite a while. That will make me feel good when I'm not so crabby and frustrated. I'm down 14 lbs. so I've reclaimed two skirts now that fit. And I have two newer ones that I can pull straight down (yikes) if you can believe it. I need to wash and maybe consign those. Consign or donate.

Well I stayed awake tonight. And I'm comfortable with my choice to go to office tomorrow. Will take a shower and think about calling it a night.

Hello everybody :D
Tea "Clink!"

Hi Subclinical :)
Thank you.
I truly understand that feeling you get from having homemade baked goods.
Nothing is better than the smell on a cold Wintery day. :D
The nicest thing about eating down the pantry contents is that it then gets restocked with new fresh things.

Hi Tatoulia :)
Thank you.
What can we all do here to help you get past this rough spot?
Want to have us all participate in challenges?
It makes me sad that you are angry with yourself and hating to be in your home and choosing to escape into sleep. ((((((HUGS))))))
Just let us know and we will all do our best to help motivate and encourage you.

Hi Anonymoniker :)
Thank you.
WAY TO GO! for vacuuming, even if you did get ill.
Kimchi is supposedly better than yoghurt for the digestive track.
Thanks for clarifying the house damage for us.
I had pictured something more drastic.

Hi CriticalMass :)
WTG! for volunteering to help.
By now you are an expert in relocating stuff to storage units. ;D
Great to hear that you are going to be doing your quilting.
Enjoy!

Everything went well at the dentist.
Nothing spooky was found so I won't have to have any work done.
Got my teeth cleaned and got my new tooth brush and tiny thing of dental floss.
Afterward I went by 2 thrift shops on my way home and found absolutely nothing.
Got home and was starving so I had a sandwich.
Then I was so sleepy that I took a 4 hour nap and I'm still tired.
Looking forward to bedtime.
Starting next week I have to force myself to make an appointment for an eye exam and new glasses.
I have been putting it off for over a year now and it has to get done, I'm as bad as Mr. Magoo.

Wow, CM/-what a terrific feeling to be able to help! Congratulations--you have come so far and at the perfect time!

I did do some things today. Nothing too dramatic but I dusted the bedroom, did one load of laundry, shredded mail, went for walk to visit BF and dropped off clothes at drycleaner. I've decided to go to office tomorrow as I feel really unhappy here right now.

I have managed to stay awake and not fall into the trap of napping.

I bet the kitties are cute, CM, and I bet they love having you.

Hoping Tillie fared okay today.

Hi everyone, lovely posts lately. I've enjoyed reading all of them. Anony, thanks for reassuring us about the tarp situation, and I hope you can find a good sturdy one anyway, to keep further damage from occurring.

I'm on day 1 of kitty sitting. A shorter day because I had things going earlier in the day, and since the cat parents have only gone since morning I just need to do the evening routine.

Had my clutter club meeting for this month. I was all jazzed about "bragging rights" regarding my storage unit move, but we had pressing matters to attend to. A member needing some teamwork to help move her stuff into a temporary storage next week so her home can be made accessible. It was a good feeling to be able to offer my van. Pay it forward with the blessings I've received! :) I will need to park a few remaining items from the van in my new storage, but that's okay. I won't be undertaking any huge projects until done kitty sitting anyway.

Tomorrow I'm going to bring my quilt and sewing machine over here during kitty time, and also go to the one quilt fabric shop I haven't checked for border fabric. I'll only need a couple yards, and I still have time while I assemble the blocks. There are some fabrics at another shop that are top contenders, but you know how we obsessives are - gotta check out all the possibilities! LOL! I promise I will be good and not overspend, though.

This getting things accomplished gig, I'm coming to enjoy it quite a bit! Thanks again for all the encouragement vibes! ;)

Thanks for your support, Anony! Sorry to hear about the stomach ache! I too need to vacuum. I need to do everything. Please keep the positive energy flowing--it helps a lot!!!

Thanks for your support, Anony! Sorry to hear about the stomach ache! I too need to vacuum. I need to do everything. Please keep the positive energy flowing--it helps a lot!!!

~♡~Warm Coffee Clinks to all!!!~♡~
Well, i had a partial vacuum victory! I did half of the kitchen & suddenly felt really nauseous. At first i thought maybe it was the hormone crash, then i thought maybe the vacuum bag was too full, making it spew toxic dust out the back, but then i realized it was that i ate too much kimichi at once(it was delicious mixed with hummous & i over did it!), but i was also suspicious that it was some kind of subconscious psychological vacuuming sabatoging thing going on...ha ha Im often blaming myself more than i should. That jar of kimichi was bubbling when i opened it, so its that! (whew!)
Today i will continue vacuuming & report back here. I found knowing that yesterday put a good kind of pressure on me! ~♡~
My trailer doesnt have any huge holes, its just the outer layer of the walls that fell off. Its far more protective than i guess id made it sound?!!
Tillie, i hope your dental appointment goes well today. Its good you can kid about it. Im sure you know this, but meditating in a 'happy place' while in the dental chair can be helpful!
SubC, i absolutely LOVED my bread making machine, years ago! I lost a little part on it & never got it replaced.
Tatoulia, sleeping is a good thing! You are so busy & in constant service to others. Relaxing & sleep will be great for you! Its important & far too under-rated these days!
~♡~Much Love & happy wishes to you all!!!~♡~
.....i just noticed the word im supposed to type in is german & that letter with the dots isnt even on my keyboard....geeez?!

~♡~Warm Coffee Clinks to all!!!~♡~
Well, i had a partial vacuum victory! I did half of the kitchen & suddenly felt really nauseous. At first i thought maybe it was the hormone crash, then i thought maybe the vacuum bag was too full, making it spew toxic dust out the back, but then i realized it was that i ate too much kimichi at once(it was delicious mixed with hummous & i over did it!), but i was also suspicious that it was some kind of subconscious psychological vacuuming sabatoging thing going on...ha ha Im often blaming myself more than i should. That jar of kimichi was bubbling when i opened it, so its that! (whew!)
Today i will continue vacuuming & report back here. I found knowing that yesterday put a good kind of pressure on me! ~♡~
My trailer doesnt have any huge holes, its just the outer layer of the walls that fell off. Its far more protective than i guess id made it sound?!!
Tillie, i hope your dental appointment goes well today. Its good you can kid about it. Im sure you know this, but meditating in a 'happy place' while in the dental chair can be helpful!
SubC, i absolutely LOVED my bread making machine, years ago! I lost a little part on it & never got it replaced.
Tatoulia, sleeping is a good thing! You are so busy & in constant service to others. Relaxing & sleep will be great for you! Its important & far too under-rated these days!
~♡~Much Love & happy wishes to you all!!!~♡~
.....i just noticed the word im supposed to type in is german & that letter with the dots isnt even on my keyboard....geeez?!

Coffe clinks! Rainy day here.

Good luck today Tillie. Hang in there! SubC I am jealous of your baking! I baked a lot when I was in college and grad school. I loved it so much. I really should try to make that a goal. Anony I worry about your housing situation! Cm I'm thinking about you! Tess, we can do this together! Joan, sending warm thoughts your way!

I am mad at myself. I choose sleep over doing stuff that would make my home more livable. With handyman out of the picture, I've given up on everything I need to do here. I need to dig myself out of this rut. I need to do more than sleep my life away.

Tillie, you are strong and brave and you can do this!

Anony, I agree, whatever else there is to protect, most of all there must be a safe place for you! Did you vacuum?

I baked a lot today. Also taught, ran some laundry in honor of tatoulia, and also, yes, got my new tablet. I had to go to the mall.

The baking makes me feel safe and rich. If I have homemade breads and sweets all is well, right? I used up all the brown sugar! I have been drawing down my pantry. (another frugal thing, although it makes my inner squirrel very nervous.) at one point I had 8 bags of brown sugar!

Next focus is noodles and rice. Noodles or rice from the pantry two nights a week until the noodles are gone. The rice will last longer because it is in big bags.

Tess, did you get some good food for dinner?

Hello everybody :)
Iced tea "clink!"

Hi Tess :)
Hope you got some yummy groceries today ;D
Doing even just 5 or 10 minutes a day is good enough to keep from falling further behind.

Hi Subclinical :)
Did you get your new iPad/tablet?
Low finances do tend to exacerbate hoarding tendencies.
Good luck tackling the excess feed bags. I tend to collect too many kitty kibble bags.
Maybe you can barter with that flavored coffee.?
I have made some good trades with some of the most ridiculous things. ;D

Hi Anonymoniker :)
Hi Anonymoniker :)
Darn! the spiders are coming back :(
The problem with decluttering is that there is good and needed/wanted stuff all mixed in that we don't want to get lost or ruined.
Plus you, your body, needs protection from the elements too.
Please do whatever you have to to cover up that hole. (((HUGS)))

Hi Porter :)
Hi Joan :)
Hi Tatoulia :)
Hi CriticalMass :)

Been getting ready today for tomorrows DDS appt.
Looked around the house and decided that the house is too dirty for me to be leaving tomorrow so I really should cancel my appointment and stay home and clean.
Unfortunately, after I washed dishes and did a little tidying of the bathroom the place is acceptable again, DARN! ;P

~☆~Iced coffee clinks to all!~☆~
Hi Tess! Your last post was very encouraging to me! Im so glad youre getting back on track! That is what i need to do, too. Its funny how much more my place bothers me over the years that it has actually improved?! I know that doesnt make sense, but its me changing, i think?! My kitchen has had the usual aggressive big spider activity, which is just this time of year...at least it detours me from eating late at night...ha ha I really need to work on the honey in the carpet. That has been impossible, so far. That is one of the many projects i am 'stuck' on...ha ha
I am going to go ahead & get a serious tarp for this roof. I realized i spend plenty of money on food, & protecting all my things is important, too....even tho a lot of it is junk that i should toss, there are many legitimately important things mixed in, as well.
SubC, i re-use all of my plastic grocery bags each time i shop for food! I keep reusing them till they wear out, then i let the store bag my food in new ones that i reuse...actually, i use them for lots of things!
Im going to vacuum today....im making a commitment on the world wide web!!! ...ill be back to either confess or celebrate!
Y'all each get so much done! It is amazing to me!
And Porter, i hope all is well with you, too?!
~♡~♡~♡~♡~♡~♡~♡~

~☆~Iced coffee clinks to all!~☆~
Hi Tess! Your last post was very encouraging to me! Im so glad youre getting back on track! That is what i need to do, too. Its funny how much more my place bothers me over the years that it has actually improved?! I know that doesnt make sense, but its me changing, i think?! My kitchen has had the usual aggressive big spider activity, which is just this time of year...at least it detours me from eating late at night...ha ha I really need to work on the honey in the carpet. That has been impossible, so far. That is one of the many projects i am 'stuck' on...ha ha
I am going to go ahead & get a serious tarp for this roof. I realized i spend plenty of money on food, & protecting all my things is important, too....even tho a lot of it is junk that i should toss, there are many legitimately important things mixed in, as well.
SubC, i re-use all of my plastic grocery bags each time i shop for food! I keep reusing them till they wear out, then i let the store bag my food in new ones that i reuse...actually, i use them for lots of things!
Im going to vacuum today....im making a commitment on the world wide web!!! ...ill be back to either confess or celebrate!
Y'all each get so much done! It is amazing to me!
And Porter, i hope all is well with you, too?!
~♡~♡~♡~♡~♡~♡~♡~

Nice to meet you too Tess. I think sometimes we backslide and we feel like we are "right back where we started" because we have forgotten how bad it was when we started. It sounds like you are making good progress getting things back under control.

CM, I am so happy that you have time for your sewing again! (i remember Tammy dolls) And cleaning up so you can put your clothes away! As for my laundry, let's just say i did not channel Tatoulia or Tillie esterday.

Hi Anony, i am glad you are finding some peace and progress outside. I always find the yard easier than the house. But i am worried about your tarp! I want you to be safe and warm and dry. Are you going to be ok for winter? It is not unreasonable to want a safe, cozy, pretty place to live! You should have that. I'm sorry your trip made you feel sad.

The studio is coming along. It is very slow, but i just keep moving in the right direction. Yesterday i spent some time making stuff and i need to get back out there and do some finish work ths morning.

Dh picked out a replacement for my ipad and told me to go buy it today because i need it for work. I feel really awful about the expense. The counters are going in in my new kitchen on monday. They are "paid for" (as in, i will be paying them off until march) but after that i don't know when we will get to do more work on the addition. Our truck needs brakes too - as in, can't drive it. Fortunatly it's a farm truck and not anyone's primary transportation to work. I'm going to need hay soon though.

The hoarding behavior is often worse when money gets tight. I am probably not going to do any more cleaning out type work for little while. Mostly i need to try to avoid unneccessary free stuff and "bargains". I did bring home bread for the chickens yesterday, but only enough to get them through the next week or so. I also brought home some flavored coffee i don't really want. I let someone talk me into it.

I have been setting aside the feedbgs for a project. I have no idea when i am going to get to this project, and they are pilingup too much. They are also hard to throw away physically because they are large and i canceled the trash. But i discovered that if i stack two on top of ech other, fold them in half, and roll them tightly, i can tie them in a plastic grocery bag and drop them easily into the grocery or gas station trash can. Or many other public trash cans i might encounter. I hate throwing the plastic grocery bag away insteadof recyling it, but until i think of a better way, or use the feed bags, i am going to start doing that every time i go out. It will draw down the pile andit will be a reminder to me that i already have more than i can manage.

Hi Subclinical! Nice to "meet" you. Your post cracked me up. Sounds like me. Especially when I have something really important the next day.

Thank you Tillie and Tatoulia! I'm already feeling so much better. The kitchen is clear enough now. I just need to clean out the fridge and pick up some groceries. I'll do that tomorrow since it's garbage night.

I didn't do very much here in the house today. After work I just did a few minutes of picking up after myself. I'm too tired to do much tonight. I am very pleased with the progress I made yesterday. It's already more home, less storage closet. Yay!

Good Afternoon Everybody :)
Iced green tea "CLINK!"

Hi Tess :)
How's it going today? :D

Hi Subclinical :)
YEA! for new socks! ;D
How's the studio coming along?

Hi Tatoulia :)
Sorry the humidity is being obnoxious.
Hope now you can rest a little easier with the sister situation. (((HUGS)))
WAY TO GO!!! with the laundry! :D
Sorry it was a fasting day, hope you get a raincheck.

Hi CriticalMass :)
LOL I would have to be sedated to ever agree to having sedation.
Don't tell anyone but more than three times over the years I have accidentally actually bitten dentists and assistants.
I just slowly clenched my mouth shut.
Shhhhhh......
I could dish it out just fine when I WAS a surgical assistant specializing in oral maxillofacial surgery, go figure.
WAY TO GO! for working to clear the way to the closet and chest of drawers!
Makes it so much easier when dealing with laundry.
Wishing you good sound sleep (((HUGS)))

Hi Anonymoniker :)
WAY TO GO! clearing the weeds!
I prefer doing honest outside work in the fresh air & sunshine over any indoor stuff.
Wonderful that you figured out a quick and easy fix to that fence issue in your garden area! :D

Got up early and was busy doing lots of stuff till afternoon.
Washed my mattress pads, rugs and a batch of rags.
Autumn is making it's self known and my mattress pad takes so long to dry when it's cold out.
Today is warm, wildfire alert (extra dry and windy) but the rest of the week is supposed to be much colder and possibly rainy.
I had a list of tasks to accomplish today and I managed to get them all done & crossed off.
Now I get to rest, eat and watch Netflix. YEA!

Hello, to all happy home hoping hommies!!!
Im not getting so much done lately. My roof tarp is now completely shredded. Ive been clearing weeds, which makes a nice difference & involves no decisions, which i like!
Ever since i went b-day gift shopping at an upscale area for my Mom, looking at my place is even more bothersome. When i got back home that day last week, it was horrifying. Its amazing how a brief outing can increase the yuckyness of what i live in every day! I dont want to live in that level of upscale luxury, but even after a week since simply spending one day shopping around luxury, my place still bothers me....part of me feels like a closet snob....with no closet space....ha ha
Im focusing on putting in the garden. It took me weeks of confused frustration at trying to incorporate the fence posts already there in to my new fence plan. Finally, i just pulled two posts out. It took less than one minute & fixed the problem! That was interestingly symbolic?!! HA!
You all sound like you are making wise & wonderful steps towards your goals! I hope you can each see that? I can! Im envious & inspired! ~♡~

Hello CM! I love hearing about your quilts and other projects! Thank you for mentioning your former friend. It did not sound like you were blaming her--you did a good job of describing the situation. I am almost always the one trying to patch things up and I think that this time, since I decided I needed to find a good way to do so, I hadn't reached out. So my sister did. I will keep it to cats from now on. In fact, we only started having frequent communication a few years ago, when she helped me with my storage unit. I have found that on those occasions when I veer off the cat topic that it goes south.

I am almost finished with my laundry. I need to fold it. I got my recycling out and I just bought cat litter. I ran into BF. He had parked by my house to sign the lease on his commercial property. He offered to take me to the French patisserie but I'm fasting today so I had to say no. Next time!

Going to run dishwasher. This humidity is taking its toll but I must press forward.

The start of a new week - iced tea clinks!

It's trying to transition into fall here but sometimes going back to summer heat. That's not an unusual SE Kansas weather pattern. Sometimes it can persist into October, but this year I'm betting it'll lose its force earlier because the summer wasn't intensely hot. Seeing leaves starting to fall makes me go "But it was just spring a couple weeks ago, wasn't it?!"

Tillie, your weather sounds like quite a relief from what you were having. I'd like to get one more watermelon too before the season's over. Much empathy over the dentist visit. I can't even do dentistry at all without the IV sedation. I have this friend who's always getting root canals and her big stress is the money. We are so different. I'd probably have said knock me out, pull 'em all, and I'll make do with dentures or a liquid diet, haha! (Hope it never really comes down to that.)

SubC, I understand about discovering the overlooked cabinet. Last year in my old storage unit I found a half-dozen or more boxes of papers hiding! I did manage to go through them and get rid of a lot and not have to lug it to the new unit. Your plans for future use of the cabinet sound very efficient. Sorry about your iPad but glad you still have some means of connecting.

Tatoulia, glad your sister reached out to you. And smart to stick to cat pics and non-controversial stuff. With some people that's just the better way to go. I had one "high-maintenance" friend who blocked me on Facebook and I thought, good for her, I don't resent her for it in the least. I'd tried not to upset her but wasn't willing to completely buy into her version of truth (long story) so it's better for both of us. I'd even tried the approach of just sharing cute things with her but then she'd have to toss a bombshell every so often. I don't mean to sound like I'm blaming her so much; we just had some differing outlooks where we didn't "click" and I think it was best on both sides to pull the plug but I didn't want to be the one to do it. I pray for her and wish her well.

Tess, nice to meet you; I started posting a couple years ago I think it was. Good for not beating yourself up and just starting in again where you are. It will get better!

As for me, I'm having catch up day. Doing two loads of laundry, working on the stacks of stuff that have been blocking access to the closet and chest of drawers. Then I'll be able to hang up/put away the clean clothes. That includes a few that remain from the bunch that spent the summer on a table across the room because I couldn't get to the closet and drawers. LOL.

So glad to have this day to do it because tomorrow is a more scheduled day, and Wednesday I start another round of cat sitting. My new storage unit (how I love saying that!) is awaiting attention. There is some big shifting needing to be done and I'm going to wait till after the cat sitting to start that. There's some stuff riding in my van, though not near as much as there had been for so long! Once I get the shifting done, that stuff from the van will fit easily into the storage. Once again, I'm glad to have been able to give away a significant amount during the transfer.

I'm poised to work again on my quilt, and also am in the mood to play dollies, LOL, i.e., draft patterns and sew clothes for them. The Barbies and Kens I bought in the new sizes, and also some vintage Tammy Family dolls (the latter are just my hobby since there's not really a market for the clothes much - those dolls were only produced for a brief period in the 60s). I may also play with some embroidery soon - I found it so relaxing when I did it for my quilt that I may just make up some extra that can go in another quilt down the road. I can do that when I watch TV.

My more serious visual art and my writing I want to get back to but I'm waiting till I get past this busy month and can focus better. I took a nice nap yesterday. Still having the kooky dream problem and night sleep pretty much sucks after about 3:00 a.m. - in fact, it feels like a negative energy drain; I wake tireder than if I hadn't slept. But the music idea and something I found online about dreams and PTSD may be promising to address all that. It would be nice to be able to look forward to "a good night's sleep."

Tess! You are back! Please don't be hard on yourself--you have taken all the right steps to get this project underway! Whatever support you need, here we are!!! I'm still plugging away here, with varying degrees of success. My first suggestion remains the same--change your sheets, then make your bed every day. I swear it helps me when I go to bed and have a made bed! And getting the trash out is satisfying too! Although I'm sorry about the circumstances that brought you here, it is great to see you again! Sending you strength and support!

Tillie, I recall how going to the DDS causes you great anxiety. Sending you peace.

SubC, I cannot sleep at night these days. Some over upset of sister and some us unexplained. On a more positive note, for the first time ever, my sister has reached out to me. We have both said our apologies so we can at least now exchange cat pictures. But we need to leave it at that. We do not do well when going beyond that.

It is humid and sticky and uncomfortable here. The most o can say is I'm doing laundry. I feel like the house smells. I feel sticky. The house feels sticky. The air feels sticky.

Hi tess, i'm new.

I have about five loads oflaundry done that are just dumped on the guest bed. I need to put the laundry away!

I slept really badly last night. With my ipad broken, i don't have my alarm. Dh set his alarm for me, but i didn't trust it to go off and wake me up, so i woke up over and over again, checking the clock to see if i had overslept. Finally got up 15 minutes early. The alarm did go off.

We went to a festival yesterday and dh bought me a new pair of socks. Super warm and cozy for winter.

Hello Everyone :)

Hi Tess :)
You did it before and you CAN do it again! :D
WAY TO GO! for this GREAT start you already got!
Getting out the trash is a fast way to see some good progress too.
What else needs to be done in the kitchen before you can start making yourself some simple home cooked meals?
Soup, salad and sandwiches are a lot less expensive and have fewer bad calories.
Hope your day went well, 15 minutes is a wonderful and motivating plan to get going. :D

Well, today I didn't "do" anything.
Sort of just hung out with the cats.
Kept thinking that I "should" actually "do" something but it's Sunday and it's OK do not "do" anything sometimes. ;)

Hi all! I can't believe it, but I'm back again. This time I'm even more disappointed in myself because I just got my apartment clean last spring. Now I'm back to being embarrassed, ashamed of myself, and full of anxiety. Also, my kitchen is a mess, so I've been eating out everyday. That means I'm gaining weight and broke! Despite all this, I'm trying not to be TOO hard on myself because I know how I got here. I lost someone very close to me and hit a bout of depression. Crap happens! Now I have to dig myself out again. It's not has bad as last time, so I know I can do it. My goal is to be back to acceptable by November 1. Just in time for vacation. I could really use any good thoughts and support you guys can send. Still appreciating you even though I haven't been around ❤️

Today I spent 2.5 hours cleaning. I cleaned off my kitchen counter, cleared my entryway and started gathering stuff into garbage bags and moving them to the side of the rooms. I also cleared my work desk and took out a couple bags of trash. I'm going to spend 15 more minutes in each room. Then I'm going to take a nice hot shower and relax for the night.

Good Morning Everybody :)
Tea "clink!"

Hi Tatoulia :)
WTG! for sleeping!
Getting enough sleep really helps our moods and helps us to think more clearly.
(((hugs)))

Kitchen is still clear & clean, no laundry to do today.
Trying to figure out what I will do since there is no "To-Do" list.
Have a lovely watermelon that I plan to cut into today. :D
I should work on swapping out some of my Summertime bedding because it is getting so cold overnight and I wake up too early but I'm not ready to say goodbye to Summer yet.
Getting anxious and nervous because I have a dental appointment for a routine cleaning this Wednesday.
It will involve talking to people and allowing them to touch me. :(
Thursday I ordered some gemstone beads. The site I get them from was having a really good sale and with Winter coming I will want to have them to help pass the time.
They will get here tomorrow. :D

All that laundry done--makes me so happy!

I changed my bed last night and did dishes. Otherwise just slept.

Congratulations SubC on the cabinet! Great work!

Hello Everybody :)

Hi Subclinical :)
YEA! WTG! that you found that hidden cabinet and conquered it! ;D
Don't worry about your wonky keyboard,
we are all very good at figuring out what was meant.

This morning the temps were down in the 40s
so today I washed all the cat blankets, quilts and bedding and swapped out some of their things for warmer versions.
Also washed the quilt I cover the couch with.
Then this evening after my shower I washed a load of my clothing.
So, a total of 5 loads of laundry done.
Cleaned the kitchen.
Repaired/fixed the back porch screen door. The cats kept pulling the wire screen free and I was tired of having to get it back on so today I hot glue gunned the spline into the groove.
That should hold for a little while. ;P

Lo! My laundry basket is a big sturdy woven thing that hods two anda half bushels. It often overflows.

I have been working in the studio this morning, but not on making. I've been firing the kiln and doing clean up/organization. I have let it get messy again and have too many unfinished tasks.

I found an entire cabinet (how can you forget a cabinet?) that i cleaned out and most of what was in it is now in the trash (little), or recycling, or headed to school. Some is put away elsewhere, and a small pile needs to be washed/fixed up. I am going to use the cabinet to store boxes of specialty clays that i buy in small quantiies.

Heads up, i broke my ipad yesterday so I am now on an ancient (older than my cat lol!) machine with a bad keyboard. I am trying to type slowly and look at my words, but there may be some strange words. Also, one of the keys that doesn't work well is the space bar.

Good Morning Everybody :)

Hi Tatoulia :)
Tea "CLINK!"
Sorry you have all that humidity :(
You have been so fortunate to have that other washer to use.
You are like me and staying on top of laundry is a priority to keeping sane. (((HUGS)))
My laundry hamper is just one of those small plastic hand baskets you use at the store when getting just a few items.
Most things get washed right away along with whatever is waiting in the basket.
Wishing you a lovely day today. ;)

Hey there Tillie! Thanks for having the dogs at the ready! It's been very humid and very rainy here. Worked late Thursday and got drenched in walk home. And the humidity was terrible. Last night walking home it was also miserably humid, with rain off and on.

Joan, your perseverance and courage are inspiring. I know brighter days are ahead.

SubC and CM--do good to hear from you and share in your victories!

Today is brother day. I'm sneaking in a quick load of laundry--things I hang to dry--before I leave to pick up brother. Knock wood, using the downstairs laundry has been great. Working from home has made this very easy.

Going to get dishes pulled together and pour a cup of coffee.

Coffe clinks!

Hello :)

Hi Subclinical :)
Wonderful that you won the 2 free firings!
A gift that you will enjoy and doesn't take up any space. :D

Hi Anonymoniker :)
Hi Porter :)
Hi Joan :)

Hi CriticalMass :)
So happy you got a LOT of good sound sleep.
It's weird but it's true that even with our eyes shut, in a dark room, clutter still effects our ability to really relax.

Hi Tatoulia :)
Very happy you dropped by
I was about to send out the search dogs to hunt you down. (((HUGS)))

The recent rains were not drenching, so today I went out and watered EVERYTHING.
The rest of the day I pretty much just vegged out watching stuff on Youtube.
Thought about stuff I could do but didn't feel like doing anything, so I didn't.
Temps were down in the 50s this morning and the highs were mid 70s today.
It was nice. :D

Hello :)

Hi Subclinical :)
Wonderful that you won the 2 free firings!
A gift that you will enjoy and doesn't take up any space. :D

Hi Anonymoniker :)
Hi Porter :)
Hi Joan :)

Hi CriticalMass :)
So happy you got a LOT of good sound sleep.
It's weird but it's true that even with our eyes shut, in a dark room, clutter still effects our ability to really relax.

Hi Tatoulia :)
Very happy you dropped by
I was about to send out the search dogs to hunt you down. (((HUGS)))

The recent rains were not drenching, so today I went out and watered EVERYTHING.
The rest of the day I pretty much just vegged out watching stuff on Youtube.
Thought about stuff I could do but didn't feel like doing anything, so I didn't.
Temps were down in the 50s this morning and the highs were mid 70s today.
It was nice. :D