We had cross-posted, CM! Glad you found the site! It did seem pretty easy to navigate and WTG for taking care of this!!

I have one bag for goodwill and I've shredded one bag of papers. I have dealt with some of the things I took from mom's drawers last week, including washing some and putting some in a plastic container for my sister to sift through.

Sister is talking about a visit mid-March. I don't have an opinion. I'll just wait and see.

So I'm forging ahead. And yes I feel better. So no reason to stop now.

Next week's task has to be getting my hot water heater replaced. I need to get that stressor done.

Okay back to work. I have showered today but no real laundry as someone else is home and seems to be using the machines.

Go to student aid.gov. They've consolidated a few sites. The firms are there and are downloading. If you need me to send to you, I will.

UPDATE

WOOHOO!!

I went to try the student loan website again, still no luck, thought to try to find a way to print out a form, and somehow in my Googling, stumbled upon the website from before - it had a new URL!

It's quite possible I had been sent an email about this, which might have gotten deleted when I lost those other Yahoo emails.

Anyway, I jotted down the new URL so I will be able to find it again AND... I got my application done and printed out! Right here at home!

So now I feel jazzed to go and do some decluttering in my room. Because I'll need to send them a copy of my Social Security income yearly letter, so in the process of getting that I might as well do some straightening. Maybe even some laundry later, depending on how the time goes.

Welcome to our chat here, Dazed! It goes a little slower than the other kind, but we get the chance to follow each others' lives and progress. Would love to have you stick around. As Tatoulia said, we are in the process of learning not to buy or save things for Mr. Justin Case. That fellow can get his own stuff! He doesn't need our help.

Semi-crazy week for me. Not too bad though.

I did get to the gym on Monday! Sorry to be slow reporting back. I just swam, very leisurely, in the warm pool. Then had a lovely sit in the hot whirlpool, and showered and came home.

It's good to know Badger has a Tardis.

Prior to that, I had made it out to the cemetery to put new flowers on my parents' grave. Their death dates are both in February with Valentine's Day sort of in the middle, and I'd wanted to do this on Valentine's Day but we had that snow and wet slop. Monday was sunny and dried out.

Tuesday I had two holy hours at church in the afternoon, filling in for the gal before me. It was a great spiritual refreshment time. I prayed for my roommate and our mechanic/handyman. There is some serious frustration going on there. He has a crazy life too, and we don't want to be pushy with him, but he also needs to learn to communicate if there will be delays. She had to rent a car for her trip because he promised to do the work on the last possible day then nothing happened and we still haven't heard back.

Tuesday evening about 10 till 10:00 I got a text that they needed me to sit with the older lady yesterday. Then yesterday morning my girl bunny wasn't herself, but she started eating before I had to leave, and seems fine now.

I had planned to go to the library and use their computers. There's paperwork I MUST do regarding my student loan debt, and I admit I've procrastinated somewhat. There's still adequate time - except the site's server is down. I tried it from more than one place. If anyone has time, try going to studentloans.gov and see if the page loads? I hope if I can't get the application done via web as I have other years, maybe I can get a hard copy somehow to print and fax... this could be a major scary headache if it doesn't work out like REAL SOON. :(

SubC hope all goes well with the baby goats and that this time they live long and prosper.

Tatoulia, glad you got those needles gone. I had some leftover unused ones from my mom and some veterinary ones. Wanted to keep a couple of the syringe part without the needle, for squirting paint in interesting ways, LOL.

That's helpful, SubC, that I can just get rid of them in the regular trash if they haven't been used. Thanks for that info. At least I hope it is true in my state - will check with my nurse friend.

Tatoulia, I feel ya on the papers. I so want to get through my "jottings," those myriad slips of paper I scribble my ideas on so my ADD brain doesn't implode from frustration. And other things - computer passwords, etc. I have a place for passwords, but sometimes if I join a new website on the spur of the moment, a slip of paper is generated. Getting those caught up will eliminate much clutter and visual distraction.

Tillie, congratulations on getting all that stuff done! I need to get going on mine. A job for the Badger, no doubt. My aunt had offered me some help last fall and I still haven't gotten going on it. I wanted to talk to my priest and to the mortuary and cemetery. And to the cousin who handles my aunt's affairs and who she said would take care of it all. It's hard being 60 miles from family and not being able to drive the highway myself. Well, more on this later.

OK, think that's most of the news for now. Off to the library.

I can feel your relief, Tillie. This will put your mind at rest. I am so proud of you for doing this and finishing it!

Well the chaos in my life/house won't get any better by thinking about it so I'll have to act!

Mom is at the dr today, I think. She didn't go Tuesday because the van didn't arrive, then I made her move it from Wednesday so we could get her house in order.

Time for me to work on papers and a donation bag. Must do today. Will feel better. The power is within me.

Good Morning Everyone
Hoping you all are having a great day ;)

Hi Tatoulia
YEA! for all that sleep!
Friday and Saturday sound like they will be fun, so have fun.
Badger loves to chew up and spit out old unneeded papers so keep him happy today as you work from home.
Enjoy all the cleaning ladies' labor in both your own home & your Mom's. :D


Today I will go to the post office and mail off Nate's copies.
This is the final step in my last wishes being legally solidified. YEA!!!
Will drop by the hospital thrift shop since it's just down the street from there.
My Hyacinth bulbs are starting to put up their leaves out in the garden.
Time to start thinking about working outside soon.

I do love cats with extra toes!

Tillie I slept nearly 12 hours and I am feeling much better. I was going to go into office today but have decided to stay home and work from here. I can shred during breaks. I do have shredder. I never returned BF's to him.

I gave plenty of trash bags and my house is so clean. What a relief to get those things done for mom! Big relief! Now I just need to get the wood chair over to her house. She wants it and I want it out of my house.

So I'll work on shredding today. I have to. I need things to get better for me.

On Friday night I have dinner with some work girlfriends and then on Saturday a different group of women are going to someone's house to make cookies. I'll take the train there and someone offered me a ride home. This should be great fun.

I'm enjoying my coffee then will log into my computer and start my day.

Nice to know your Mom's home is very sanitary now.
I know how the mess was upsetting for you but she fussed too much when you would try to clean things.

How wonderful there was a petting zoo there!!!

My uncle was a merchant marine.
Sailors are very superstitious and they believe that cats with extra toes are very lucky to have.
They are adorable.

OK. When is the next day you can have all to yourself?
This day you and Badger will take a BIG bite out of those closet papers.
Do you have the shredder? Do you have enough trash bags?
I'm sure that most of these papers can just leave.
The few "keepers" can later be filed.


Right now I have a plethora of papers.
My plan is on Friday I will sort and organize them and get rid of all the unneeded ones then file the "keepers" away.
But tomorrow I am going to the post office and send off Nate's copies.
I hate papers and prefer to just toss all of them into the burn barrel but that is self defeating behavior.

The cleaners just just arrived here at my house. They earned their money at mom's, I am sure. I haven't seen it but when I stopped by they were scrubbing the kitchen cabinets. Mom sat outside in the hallway. When I stopped by, I took her downstairs where they had a petting zoo of sorts. Mom held a kitty. They had lots of kitties and sweet doggies and beautiful rabbits and a goat and a pig. The elders were in heaven. We got a kitty with extra ties for mom to hold and love.

I'll have to run up to close her window. The ladies left it open since the cleaning smell was so strong.

Now I have deal with my closets. I keep failing to start. I need to do this, the second they leave here. Feel free to laugh. I'll probably just shower and climb into bed.

But I have to do it. I haven't done it and I need to. I can't live with all the papers just shoved in my closets. It's bad for me. I need to do something about this.

Tillie you are just so sweet. I am tired and I have to figure out what to do once I have my house back to myself.

Hi Tatoulia
Hope you are doing alright (((HUG)))

YEA! for cleaning ladies!

I know that we all here feel very lucky to have you with us.

Should you come across another sharps container I would suggest that you ask the doctor's assistant if it would be alright to add it to their already much larger pile.
I know that I would have done that when I was working.

Wishing you a refreshing shower and a deep relaxing nap.
You earned it. ;)

Ok cleaners are at mom's, then they come here. Then I shower and nap.

Trying to hang in here. Stress levels high.

Ok the hazmat waste people came and took the needle containers. What a relief. Only one box required so $75. Thank goodness. I was starting to panic that it would be $225. Very smooth process. I may still pass across another needle receptacle but such is life.

My cleaners will clean her apt at 1. They are going there first, then my apt. I am very excited.

Was a nervous wreck yesterday. Doing better today.

My sister wrote me to say how lucky the family is to have me. Just once I'd like the acknowledgement that I am unlucky. Sorry to be negative.

Thank you both so much and Ms. Kitty too (((HUG))) :D

I watch these cute animal videos on Youtube on the tv through the Roku.
The other day there were two goats playing and butting heads and they had pretty colored foam pool noodles fastened on their horns.
That way they could play and nobody would get hurt.
It was very cute and made me think of Subclinical.


After I rested up a bit this afternoon I ran the vacuum, scooped litter boxes and swept the floors.
It was a good day. :)

You did it!!!! Congratulations!!! I am so proud of you!!! Kitty is proud too!!!

Tillie,

I only gave a minute, but I am so very very proud of you!
And happy for you!

Yay Tillie!

Good Afternoon Everyone

I DID IT!!! :D

Shortest distance to the credit union is by turning left out on the dangerous highway, I did it!
At the credit union the notary notarized my will and advance directives.
They were all very friendly and helpful.

Then drove into downtown and found a parking space near the courthouse.
Went in, passed through the metal detector while my purse was x-rayed, nice lady officer called me "Darlin".
The court clerk was great, happy and friendly.
Now my will is on file at the courthouse so nobody can quibble that the copy isn't legitimate.

Then drove to the office business and had copies made, one copy of the will and advance directives for me & one for Nate.
The lady there was very helpful and nice.

Then drove to the pony express (post office) and asked the nice clerk about mailing envelopes.
Got the envelope.
Now I just need to write Nate a little note and then mail him his copies.
So, one more trip to the post office this week.

Came home, ate lunch.
Been resting.

I DID IT!!!
And it feels so very good. ;D

Good Morning Everyone

Hi Subclinical
Thank you :D

YEA! a table at the Spring sale!
Have fun swimming today.


8am. Drinking tea.
Don't need to rush since most all the places to visit today don't even open till 10am.
High anxiety but I won't allow that to stop me. ;)

Tatoulia and Tillie, you are both being amazing!

CM, did you get to the gym? My mom says it's never too late 😉. Today is a swim day for me.

Much to do this morning and have to leave early to go by the pottery studio and sign up for a table for the spring sale.

Thank you Tatoulia
Yes, I feel very good/relieved that I have made these efforts to take direction with my life/death.

I believe that animal and human spirits are eternal and what we have felt/loved in this life we will remember even after.

Makes me smile thinking of BF and the kitty. :)
From what you described, your Mom's place would have made anybody feel uncomfortable and anxious.
WAY TO GO!!!! for you doing what you are doing and especially for hiring help!

YEA! for getting trash/recycling out!
Badger has the free time to chew on your heels to help you get those papers shredded. ;)

Tillie, I am so proud of you! Taking charge of your life (and afterlife). Your gramma would be so proud of you. I'm sorry about the sad anniversary. I don't know what you believe or don't believe, but I hope you'll see her again.

We took care of mom's groceries tonight but can tell Bf loves that new cat. He also loves how mom's place is shaping up and he's much more willing to just drop by now.

All garbage and recycling out. I didn't shred papers but I did get a good walk in today.

CM, SubC, Tess, Dazed... everyone and anyone...stop by when you can.

Good Afternoon Everyone

Hi CriticalMass
Hope Badger got you to the gym.
Remember Badger has a Tardis so it's no problem for him to get around. ;)

Hi Tatoulia
WAY TO GO!
Decluttering and delegating tasks!
FANTASTIC! that you are managing your savings that way and taking care of number 1 first.
Good plan taking that bag of "keep" home. ;)


My Granma has been dead 35 years today. :(
Seems the older I get the more I miss her.

Did a bunch of food prep/cooking. Kitchen is a mess but I just ate and am taking a short rest before I get to it.
Plan is tomorrow I will see the notary at the bank.
Then go to the courthouse to have a copy of my will documented.
Then go to the office supply place and make copies so I can send copies to Nate.
Then to the post office to get a mailing envelope.
Whew!!!
That's a lot of running around.
I have cold feet but I WILL do this!
Yes I will. ;)

I have released the badger!

Just got back from mom's. Emptied the chest. Took the top off and broke the lock. I had wanted to put it in my car and put it out back tonight for free pickup but nixed the idea and will have the place charge me a disposal fee. I'm doing all I can right now.

I did take my bonus from Friday and immediately put it into a savings account not tied to my checking or other savings account. I need to find a way to take care of me and not everyone else. I need to find out what day they are paying our annual bonuses (something separate). It used to be the first week in March but they've changed it, I think. I'll have to figure it out.

I threw out a few things that she didn't see me do. And it killed her to have me trash her Burberry coat, which I would've gladly had drycleaned and would've loved to have for myself, but it's too far gone. She probably got that fifty years ago in London. I couldn't even donate it. But she wore it forever and a day. I wish it had been good enough for me to wear.

I let her keep way too much. I also just stacked everything and told her that she and her aide are going to have to figure it out. I'm delegating.

Oh boy she's a pain in the buttinsky. But such is life.

I'm home. I have a bag to taje from her house for me to "keep" but in truth, I'm donating.

Tatoulia, can we share the Badger? Or find a sibling. I need him or her to get me all the way to the gym. I have almost everything in the van ready to go.

Will report back afterward for accountability.

Thanks,

CM

Dazed I'm sorry you couldn't access the group. YES call the 800 number and they will help you! I've even spoken to Corey himself a few times! Very dedicated!

When I first came on here I spent a lot of time reading the posts. Very helpful! So please do all and know we can help out!

Sometimes starting out means getting a trash bag and filling it with trash. For me, I like to make my bed. We all have different methods but one goal. Also, stay hydrated and eat as well as you possibly can. Move forward! We are here!

Tillie that must've been great to catch up with Nate! And yay for getting your affairs in order. Last year, when I made a new will, it felt so good. Now I know BF will inherit everything and if not him, then one of my closest girlfriends. And it's a relief and a weight off of my shoulders.

I'm doing laundry and I'm so excited. Then I'll quickly run some errands but not too many as I think we'll be running errands later.

I have not made any paperwork progress. Where is the badger??!!!????


Oh, SubC, we can't put needles in the trash here anymore. The rule changed in 2013, I think. I'm just grateful mom no longer needs insulin so this will be one big expense then done.

I wasn't able to access the online support group. I want to join you all because I need help desperately. I am trying to access this from my phone, and the box just doesn't appear.

I'm going to call the 800# for the hosts of this board, and see if they can help me.

I did read some posts yesterday, and they helped me to the degree that I know I'm not alone. That in itself is inspiring and gives me hope.

Good Morning Everyone

Hi Dazed
Hope you found what you were looking for. :)

Hi Tatoulia
WAY TO GO! for all you have been getting done at your Mom's!!! :D
Yes, Never mix pineapple with cranberry juice! ;)
BF is right, something she hasn't seen in ages, doesn't need, is not important and she doesn't even remember owning it can be snuck out.
Just keep reassuring her that if she ever needs something (like those syringes) they can be obtained in less than 20 minutes. (((hug)))

Hi, Subclinical
Wishing you good luck finding that paper quickly.
Please be kind to yourself.
When negative voices start up in your head firmly state positive affirmations to yourself to drown the negative out. (((HUGS)))
WOW! she's getting an apartment!
YEA! Now you will have some more empty space! ;D


In a little bit I will go out and hang laundry on the clothesline.
Have a plan to cook a veggie, beef and rice dish later today.
Then clean the kitchen, again.
Had a long telephone conversation yesterday with Nate!!!
I called to get some info from him and inform him & Mrs. Nate that I am preparing my advance directives and will.
Once they are finalized and notarized and the will has been entered down at the courthouse I will send them copies of everything.
Then I can stop fretting about "what if" something happens and I don't have my affairs all in order. :D

Good morning! I'll take the badger today, if that's ok.

I need to shred papers from my closet. It's absolutely ridiculous that I keep putting that off.

I will also work at mom's today. I need to clear out her hope chest and disassemble it. BF reminded me to just sneak out stuff I need to sneak out.

I'm doing laundry. I haven't find any all weekend. That's not like me. But I've been taking good care of mom so I guess that counts. I was exhausted yesterday from going out Saturday. We kept joking about my hangover (I don't drink) and how I really shouldn't have mixed pineapple juice with cranberry juice. So reckless!

I know I have more posts to catch up on. But for now I'll have some coffee and start shredding. I owe it to myself.

Good morning.

I am going to need that frog today.

My list of all the ways I am failing started before my feet hit the floor.

Also I lost something small, important, and paper. Now I can't take the recycling until I find it or go through each individual piece.

Dd2 was here yesterday. She is signing a lease on an apartment by herself in March and will need some furniture. Also, I told her she will need to take or pack up all of her belongings. At minimum there is a bookshelf currently loaded with books going. And she needs her microwave. These things will make space in the little porch bedroom that has become a storage room.

Dazed, I hope you got that to work for you! And we are here. Not professionals but definitely people working through boards and in the case of Tillie, someone who lives with a hoarder. I got my house under control a while back and now am working on my mom's. I say house but they are apartments. I now have cleaning ladies every other week, so I don't have to clean.

There are lots of ways to get started. We can help you! It is something you can do and we are here anytime.

I still have more stuff to let go and I am working on it. I've stopped the influx of stuff. And that's been great. I used to buy multiples and whatever was on sale. I felt I needed to have things on hand in cAse anyone ever needed it. Now I leave those things at the store, where they belong.

We can do this! So I hope you'll feel free to join us. Good group here. Changed my life.

Ok, dazed, I clicked that box, then I clicked the little log in box that came up and logged in, and then I could see the chat - which is happening right now. Good luck!

Dazed, I don't know. I get my support here on the boards.

The "offline" box is higher up and brighter red than the other one - which just says "online support group" in caps.

I cleaned one stall today and moved the bucks out of the kidding stall. Mr. kitty caught a rat. We are trying to get ready for the baby goats.

Tatoulia, I'm glad you and bf are good again, and that your mom's aides are working out. Good luck with the chair! I cap the needles, screw them into a plastic container, and throw them in the regular trash when the container is full. I used to give them to a nurse friend for biohazard collection, but she said I didn't need to if they weren't infectious, just protect the trash guys.

I got some pottery done today too.

But then I decided to turn my brain off and watch a few videos. I think it was a good choice.

On my device, the red box indicates that it is offline. Do you have to register via email to chat here with the online group that has already started?

Dazed, on my screen there is a red box to the right and up a bit that says "online support group" if you click that it takes you to a login for the Sunday night chat..

Hi Tatoulia.

Thank you for your kind words. I have been navigating this board a bit and trying to find out some info.

I'm doing this from my phone so it's very difficult.

Where in the board is the part where professional come on at 8pm Sundays?

Hi Dazed and welcome! I've never done the chat feature so I'm not sure how it works. We are here for you!!! You can do this and we can help you through.

I am so behind in reading! But Tillie I am thrilled with your paperwork and benefits progress! WTG! That makes sense that SSA won't make you go that far for benefits. Great work!

I am exhausted beyond belief today, even though I slept til 11:30. We celebrated Valentine's Day last night and we were out very late. So I'm tired, tired, tired. He sent me roses at work on Friday even though we'd agreed no more flowers because kitty eats them. We have worked through it and I feel very strong once again.

We got mom's new tv table In today. I got the chair removed and I took the small table to goodwill. We still have to take apart the hope chest.

I've hired a company to come get her buckets and buckets of needles from back when she took insulin. I was assessing the needles and I was asking her where else she might have any and she mentioned that she was saving two unused ones. I told her I'd already put them in the bin, and reassured her that if she ever needs meds again intravenously, they will send her new needles. The poor thing. So hard to let go.

This is very expensive for me to get her organized but I have to do it. She seems so much happier these days and I am grateful for it.

I'm sorry I'm not caught up on posts.

I have to get the chair out of my apt and over to hers. I am so grateful she has her morning aide and it is going so well.

Hi. Subclinical told me to check here. I need to find help. I am overwhelmed. I can't even say the H word.
Do the professionals come on still at 8pm Eastern?

Good Morning Everyone

Hi Subclinical
Baby goats due this week!!!
OK, you take care of yourself too.
Rest when you can, don't stay cold for too long.

I agree, February is hard.
Shopping for baby furniture is hard too with all of the researching safety things to consider and recalls on some models.

Wishing you a victorious day! :D


Fell asleep early last night and managed to sleep in this morning.
It's a gray cloudy day with a slight chance of sprinkles.
No set plans for today, will just play it by ear.

Hey! Now we have a frog and a badger!

CM, you will get the things done that need to be done. February is very hard. Last night we went "shopping" (not buying yet) for car seats, strollers, and cribs with the kids and then out to dinner, and we all agreed that February is hard.

I have been really pushing myself. Keeping up with lesson plans and making a point to do pottery stuff this week.

Yesterday I felt Annie's (the goat) baby(s) move and was very happy that at least one goat is bred. I haven't been able to tell. Then I came inside, checked my breeding book, and realized that those babies are due this week! I am not ready! I also looked back over the years and realized that Annie has never had a baby survive to adulthood, so I am guessing she has some kind of genetic issue going on, and I am worried about getting attached.

But, soon there will be lots of milk!

Tillie, get lots of rest. You deserve it!

Off to conquer my day....

Good Late Afternoon/Early Evening

Been a nice easy day today.
Weather is good. No wind, some clouds but warmed up this afternoon.

Did some hand sewing, alteration.
Brushed a huge pile of fuzz off Twinkles.
Ate off & on.
Kitchen is clean.
Did litter boxes, washed cat dishes, put out fresh water & dry food.
Fell asleep by 9pm last night and got up about 6am so I am very well rested.
Looking forward to not having to go anywhere for at least a week. :)

Hi CriticalMass :)
You all are in my prayers every day (((HUG)))

I like the latest frog pic you posted.
No negative self talk.

Maybe you could find some small little decluttering/organizing project to do while roommate is gone?
Something that could be wrapped up in a few hours and doesn't involve a lot of different parts.

Have fun at the bunny club tomorrow.
Happy you stayed inside and didn't take any chances going out in that sloppy weather.

Flyby

Roommate headed to see her family 3 hrs away and I have the conn. Dog went with her so it's cats, bunnies, fish, and frog.

Bunny club get-together tomorrow. Mass tonight so I can take my time in the morning getting ready for the bunny club! LOL

Want to do some huge organizing thing but that has not worked well in the past when she is only gone 1 or 2 nights.

I think I've been having some SAD, too. Didn't make it to the gym this week because of very cold sloppy weather and other contingencies. But next week looks promising.

Trying to stay positive. Asked some people to pray for me. Praying for me. Praying for other people. That's how it works...

Hope you all had a Happy Valentine's Day yesterday.

Good Morning Everybody

Hi Subclinical
So glad the boy attended his classes :)

WTG! catching up on the latest slang! My slang is a bit outdated. ;)
Your classes are so much fun!!!
Would love to see the "puppet" kids too.
Have a great and productive day staying nestled inside where it's warm.

The mornings here have been bitterly cold but by afternoon it's pleasantly warm out, almost 60 degrees.
Today I need to clean the kitchen. Yesterday I did some food prep & cooking, ate and then was too tired to clean up.
At least today I have food all made up ready to eat in the fridge.
Sautéed mushrooms, raw cauliflower flowerets, sweet potatoes and cucumber slices marinated in home made Italian dressing.

I had a great day with my "pioneers" We made mason bee houses and sampled varieties of honey and dipped candles. And the teens were able to do this with minimal instruction so they filled the silence trying to teach me slang. My puppet kids are ready for "dress rehearsal" and performance next week. And I was exhausted.

I slept almost nine hours last night, so I'm back to tired, but still have a lot to do today. It's 15 degrees out, so I will be huddling inside with my lesson plans and papers and later my home studio and clay. I also desperately need to get my seed order out.

The boy from my class doesn't have me on Fridays and I missed seeing him, but I checked with another teacher and he was present and seemed fine. She was bewildered about why I would ask, but i just said "he didn't share anything?" And she said "no." And is the type to respect the students privacy, so I just said "just be gentle with him." Which was really unnecessary because "gentle" would be one if her primary descriptors.

Tillie, I think that if you have a financial poa, you don't have to have your name on the account. In any case, wishing you all the raspberry jam!

Good Evening Everyone

Hope you all had a GREAT day today. :D

Think I will sleep well tonight.
Last night I tossed and turned all night and woke up at around 4am & couldn't get any more sleep.
This has been a very hectic and trying week but it's all good. :)

Good Afternoon Everyone

Just 1pm here.
Been resting and doing a few tasks around here.

Went and had my phone conference with social security at 9am.
Have another one scheduled for March 3rd.
But at least it's all started now.

Even if I don't get social security because Steven has my name on the checking account where his pension funds are deposited I WILL be getting a medicade card and food stamp card in the mail soon.
Steven put my name on that so I can pay bills when/if he is hospitalized since I am his medical and financial POA.

If I get anything more, that will just be tons of icing on an already lovely cake, the kind of cake that has raspberry jam between the layers. ;D

Happy Valentines Day

Just a quick drive by to say I am up and awake and getting ready to go to my appointment.
Have all my paperwork together.

Hi Subclinical
Have a great day today!
My fingers are crossed that that kid comes to your class today. X

Yay Tillie!

I am so glad you got him to sign the papers!

Didn't swim.

Dd cancelled to spend time with her dh who is struggling with SAD, and in my reply to her I mentioned that the lighting at the clay studio is really good.

The lighting at the pool is really bad and I know this might not make sense, but being wet in the evening is hard on me.

So I decided to take my swim time to go down to the studio and roll out some slabs. Loaded them on the car and brought them home to work on this weekend. I feel a little more "together" for having done it.

I still did yoga 3x this week and swam once.

Finding balance is really hard.

Some days not screaming is really hard too. Yesterday I found out another student had a youth suicide attempt in his family this week.

I assigned reading homework. I wanted to take this kid aside and say "hey, forget the reading. Your homework is to take a shower, eat something with vegetables, and talk to any responsible adult about what you are feeling." Instead I am hoping he comes to school again today and I get a chance to ask how he's doing. He came yesterday for only my class.

Finally...

Got him to sign the papers.
Had to endure an awful lot of verbal abuse though.
He was very angry that he needed to do something for me.
I do believe by what he said that he resents me getting anything for myself.
That it has been so easy for me to find answers and assistance.

He gets ALL his information from his "friend" who obviously only gives out uneducated ignorant advice.

Steven is in terrible shape.
His hands tremor terribly all the time, especially when he tries to write.
Wish he would go back for his follow up check ups at the neurologist.
Hand tremors was one of his brain tumor symptoms.
But he will not listen to me or the neurologist.