Good Morning Everybody

Hi Subclinical
WTG! Mr. Kitty!!!

So happy you were making good choices about what to do and trying to not do too much in a day. (((HUG)))

Have a great day today and a wonderful afternoon/evening swimming and out to dinner. :D

Hi CriticalMass
It is fun visualizing houses, even though we never actually are there.

Please do go to your senior and community place.
I had no idea so much was available and how they could answer so many of my questions.

Stay safe and warm with this latest weather. (((hug)))


Hi Tatoulia
How wonderful Mom's aide is there!!! :D
I know that cats will tell you the can food is a necessity but actually it's not.
Dry food and water is all that most cats ever get. ;)
That chair can wait.
Wishing you pleasant days going in to work. (((hug)))


Still can't believe that I will actually be getting this help.
Social security has it set up that they won't make seniors travel 150+ miles round trip to Carson City.
That's why tomorrow I will have a conference call with the main office at the senior center.
The lady here is an authorized agent.

I have two papers that Steven needs to sign for me to turn in tomorrow and he still has not signed them. >:(
So all day today I get to keep asking him to sign them, butthead.

Once I finish with my paper work tomorrow I will get my last will and advanced directives finalized & notarized.
It's been such a whirlwind experience this week for me. :D

Everything I am accomplishing is directly due to my practicing the Gentle Art Of Swedish * Cleaning.
Getting out there and tying up loose ends.
And it feels so good! And such weight is lifting from my spirit. :)

Oh Tillie! That is so good! What a nice place to go when you need a break from the house! And goodies! And It would be lovely if you could go see a doctor and they could actually help you feel better!

Are you sure you want Steven to go? I don't want him to mess up your new lovely place with his awfulness.

Tatoulia, so much progress at your mom's! Between the aides and the cleaning fairies you may just learn how to relax sometimes! So happy for both of you! Don't worry about the chair yet, and I hope things with BF settle down quickly. I hate it when Dh and I are out if sorts.

Mr. kitty gets treats sometimes, but otherwise he only gets cereal. If he wants "wet food" he has to catch it himself. Yesterday he brought me another rat and I gave him special kitty treats and told him he was wonderful.

CM, stay warm. We are holding your hand so you can face thinking about your big scary job idea. I know you can do it when you are ready. It would be great if you found a place like Tillle's. Meanwhile, you have been doing well with your shelves.

I got through yesterday. Didn't do most of my class prep, so that will be this morning. Also didn't have time to squeeze in the grocery stop or some of the things I wanted to do at lunch, but it was ok in general. I made good choices about which things to do and not trying to do too much.

Another full day today. Dinner out with dh tonight to look forward to after swimming. Time to get moving!

Quick check in for now

SubC, hope the seminar was inspiring. Sounds like you're holding your own even though busy.

Tatoulia, you're doing amazing things with your mom. I fear my own clutter gets to that point despite my best efforts. But I promise to keep on picking away at it.

Your idea of having her look at photos of happy surroundings makes me realize I should do that some more, as it has been helpful in the past for goal setting.

I have actually been looking at books and websites of house plans as a way of unwinding, and it's research for a novel about a blended family where the father has one daughter and the mother has four children, three if whom still will live at home for awhile. How they adjust to the big changes, new relationships, etc. I wanted to be able to have a visual of their home!

The downside of doing this is that it increases my longing for a place of my own, but it's still fun.

Tillie, I'm so happy for you finding that great senior place to get your retirement ducks lined up in a row! I bet the relief and interest will soon help dampen the initial anxiety. You've already taken the big steps, steady as she goes. This will improve your quality of life, and Steven's too if he will go, but one hurdle at a time.

I need to go to our senior place and possibly this other community place at some point; at least I've been attempting to discern where and with what goals in mind. Wondering about bringing in income.

It's a Huge Scary Thing, wondering about a JOB maybe. I don't even want to say too much about the idea just now. I want to explore and get practical advice about how any such thing would jibe with my disability status.

We had snow here today that was wet and pretty, and had been melting off, though later a north wind came in which is predicted to send temps plummeting possibly to single digits. Ick. Had no trouble persuading kitty to sleep with me though. Monday I'd done a bunch of laundry. He likes my minky blanket for making biscuits on. It must remind him of his momma's tummy.

Tillie! What is this magical place you've discovered? So great! Yay for Medicare and all the other things! Social security may make you go there to sign up. I am so happy about all of this!!!! So great that you can get some assistance!! Yay you for doing this!!!!

Well mom's aide took all the sheets and towels out and washed them and folded them today. I only have to work on the top and bottom shelves. The rest is perfect! I'll post a picture. She's still not feeding the cat and mom doesn't know how to ask her (my mother is very shy). So I left out a can, a paper plate and a spoon.

My mother's place looks so neat! I cannot wait to get the cleaners there next week for a good a scrubbing!

I haven't arranged for the chair's removal. Too busy and preoccupied. I have to go to office tmr and Friday so I'll figure it out over the weekend.

Tillie I am so proud of your courage and I pray this works out! You are my hero!

Ps kitty is doing fine with her water and cereal. I fed her wet food and she was happy but she's such a little angel, no complaints about the dry food at all.

Oh yeah,
they have one day each month called birthday day for anyone with a birthday in that month.
Today was birthday day, along with lunch they served birthday cake and ice cream.
AND they had a live band and it was pretty good.

Good Evening Everyone

Hi Tatoulia
Sorry you have a rough patch with BF (((HUG)))

So happy about Mom's morning aide!
As long as Kitty has her cereal and water she will be alright until you can treat her to the canned stuff.


Went to the senior center this morning.
When I returned home Steven had messed up internet connection while connecting things for his desk top computer.
Just now I got back online.

Anyways...
She said I will get medicade that will pay for everything.
Doctors, tests, medicine, surgeries, dental, vision, hearing, EVERYTHING and there will be no co-pay or whatever from me.
That I will get lots from food stamps.
She said I will get reduced electric rates.
I have a 9am appointment Friday with her to do a phone conference with social security to find out what I may get from that.
Honestly, I am in shock, disbelief.
I'll believe it when I see it.

Still didn't have lunch there. Today was roast beef.
Found out they have a food give away last Thursday of every month there.
You drive up and they put stuff right in your car.
Different stuff than the food bank, maybe government cheese?
They also have free tax preparers.
Exercise classes, arts & crafts, nutrition help and so much more.
A table to put items for anyone to take for free like today was jeans, a jigsaw puzzle, a pencil puzzle book and a bag of cotton balls.
It's like I found a treasure chest full of all sorts of lovely things at the senior center.
Steven is very resistant to going there but I'll keep working on him.

Tillie!!! Wtg! I am so proud of you! Courage! Strength! Great work!!! Very proud and how wonderful you knew a few people, too!

Mom has a morning aide and she got a nice shower yesterday. The aide folded and stacked all the treasures hanging around mom's house and it's helping me with mom. I walked home from work last night and went straight to mom's. We finished our dinner from the night before and I fed the cat. Mom didn't know how to ask her aide to feed the cat and although she hadn't eaten in the canned food sense, she had eaten about half of her cereal.

Mom said the three magazines I gave her didn't really have any rooms so I'll pick three more from her pile to look at. I just need her looking at pretty and clear spaces as I make her place livable.

Today is the day I'm supposed to get mom's chair, etc our big I don't have it in me to do organization for her today. I'm beat. Things are a little rocky with BF now too so that's not helping. I hate to put that in writing.

SubC I hope you are having a great day!!! It is sunny here and I'm not sure if the temperature but I'll go for my walk at five to visit mom and maybe run an errand or two.

Thank You Subclinical :D

Have a great and busy day today.

7:30am and I am up & having tea.
Tossed and turned all night, have a slight headache but I WILL be going today!!! :O

She is lovely inside and out!

I have a full day today. Leave at 8, some setup and then classes until 4:30 with a 45 minute lunch break I have too much planned for, free seminar at the clay studio until 6:30 (if I get out of my classroom fast enough I might even sneak in a quick grocery stop) then an hour drive home to chores and prep for tomorrow.

Tillie has a full day too! Be brave Tillie! We are with you, and even if they don't know it, the cats will be happy if you have the things too!

Good Evening Everybody
Just 9pm here now.

Hi Subclinical
"Busy, tired, but doing ok."
YEA! :)

That's your Mom?!!!
She's lovely! :D
Will try to revisit if I can borrow Steven's computer for a minute to run the video.

Right now I am planning on going tomorrow.
I keep trying to make up excuses and imagining all sorts of terrible scenarios if I do go.
But I am trying hard to keep my big girl panties on and not in a twist.
Have my clothes selected and set out.
Explained to the cats why I need to leave them.
Plan to be there by 10am.
"I will do this, I will do this, I WILL DO THIS"...

Oh Tillie, please go to the senior center soon if not tomorrow! I want you to have all the things!

We are proud of you for being brave!

If you go to the video but don't click play, I think you see a picture of my mom. She's wearing a purple shirt. The still is not a very good picture because in real life she is almost always smiling.

Tatoulia, I also laughed about the silverware!

Busy, tired, but doing ok.

Good Afternoon Everyone

LOL Tatoulia ;D


Well...
This morning I did something so very terrifying!
But it all worked out ok.

Went to the senior center!!!
Never been there before and was so very terrified going some place unfamiliar.

The people were very nice friendly and helpful.
I now have the advance directive and last will papers to fill out.

They want me to return tomorrow (Wednesday) because there are people there who will help you get social security, medicade and all other sorts of things.
I don't have any of those things.

They have daily free lunch for anybody 60+ and wanted me to join in but I was too nervous to eat anyway.

There were some people there that I already know from my thrift shop visits.

Now I just have to get up the courage to go back there tomorrow or any other Wednesday.
Wish me luck. ;)

Is there anything you can dress up in silverware costumes so he'll throw it out?

Thank you Tatoulia :)


Just a heads up...
I have had a very hard time trying to get Steven to stop tossing the silverware into the trash can.
;)

Beautiful day for line drying laundry.
Soon as I get off the computer I will go bring it in and put it away.
It will smell so good.

https://www.nvsos.gov/sos/online-services/nevada-lockbox/about-advance-directive-registry

Tillie this should be helpful.

There are other directives you can get, Tillie, such as directives as to what to do if you are incapacitated. I've signed one that basically says go ahead and do things even if it hastens my death. But I won't let them leave me thirsty. I still want fluids. (I drink a huge amount of water each day). Be sure to send Mr Nate a copy of whatever you sign. I can take a look at the directives in NV for you and let you know what might be best.

Fantastic idea on the trash can, Tillie! Honestly that would make a huge difference! Easily done!

I was there only for a minute. Fed kitty, brought her a bunnykins porridge bowl and filled it with dry food. Gave her a can of fancy feast. I handed mom three magazines with instructions to show me the aesthetic that makes her feel calm and peaceful and serene and I'll recreate the feeling in her home.

I haven't read your longer post as I have training the afternoon. Thank you so much! The waste basket is a great idea!

Someone is coming to meet mom this afternoon. I don't know if it's the morning person or the afternoon person.

Tatoulia
We cross posted

(((HUGS))) I really feel for you.
You are doing great fighting an uphill battle.
BF is right. Sneak out some long lost items, she won't notice.
So glad you cancelled that cell phone!
And never let that person who does her meds quit.
Have you placed a small trash can near her chair?
She might use it.
Something brightly colored?

Hang in there :)

Good Morning

Hi Subclinical
Hope you can find a good balance for yourself.
Just the right amount of have-tos and commitments and time enough that's just for you to rest and play.
Sorry I haven't seen the video yet. My laptop freezes and crashes whenever I try to play videos.


Thanks Tatoulia for that info.
Tried to get the DNR form from the hospital here, they refused to give it to me and stated they do NOT honor DNRs which is why I want something durable enough to sue if they ever revive me.
Did you have any luck finding a tv table?
Great someone will be giving your Mom her daily meds and hopefully she will get every dose and on time too.



Have laundry to hang out this morning but waiting until the temp gets a little higher.

Great work, SubC!

I'm puttering around my house today. I did a lot at mom's last night. It was a struggle but I did it. She's very upset that I'm cleaning and clearing. There isn't even one chair for someone to sit it because there's stuff piled high everywhere. It's really terrible. We bought her two new pieces at the consignment shop. One is a small chest of drawers that we put next to her recliner. It is perfect height and size. I removed the tiny high table she's been using. I cleaned out it's one drawer (all junk) and organized her new chest. The bottom drawer looks like it's two drawers but it's one deep drawer. I put her bags of knitting projects in it (generally on the floor and covered in garbage). The top drawer, I very neatly laid out her stationery, her pens, one small pair of scissors and that's it.

'm now storing the cat food cans in the other cleaned out kitchen drawer. She usually had those stacked in front of the microwave, meaning they had to be moved to use it.

I got frustrated because she wouldn't even let me donate a paperback copy of Jane Eyre. She's going to read it again. Along with 40-50 other books. She has extremely low vision. She cannot see the pages. I did tell her that I realize she wants people to know that she's educated and cultured but it's lost in the clutter. On the floor. With paper plates and water bottles on top of it.

I'm frustrated with it. I'm embarrassed when the aides come in because it's a reflection on me. There isn't one chair to sit on. She tries to poke holes in my insistence that her place is a mess by pointing out one small area that I had just cleaned. I found her heated massager yesterday and she said she had been looking for it. And I said okay so this goes into the bathroom, right? And she was aggravated but agreed.

Once she's mobile again, she'll tear the place apart, looking for this thing or that thing. After I cleaned and cleared her main closet around Christmas, she said she wanted to see her sheet music and made me pull it out. I know she'll tear the place apart if she gets mobile again.

My new tactic for today is I need her to go through me of the many designer decorating magazines and to show me pictures of rooms she likes. Then I will work towards making her room look like that.

I am not giving up. She may have but I haven't.

The tv stand I bought her is still in my car. I need other things to happen before I can bring it in.

I need the upholstered chair removed. She claims she knows three different people who want it. I said great, I'm having it removed and they can retrieve it from wherever the person puts it. Then I'll be able to bring her chair that's here (the one I wanted because it reminded me of my dad) up to her place.

She has been slightly better because she's having her meals delivered and she's eating them. Last night when the medication person came in, the person asked if I wanted to give her the meds. I said no, she won't take them for me. She also told me that once she's walking again, she'll go back to taking her own meds. Nope.

I am fighting for her and I know that I'm doing this for the right reasons. BF told me to just sneak out one thing a day. I did get a big bag of garbage out last night. Oh, and I canceled her cell phone. She doesn't use it, it's never charged, she can't see it, etc, but she's been automatically paying $25 a month for it because she thinks she needs it. Meanwhile I'm stuck with her $700 phone/ internet bill.

At one point last night I told her, you should let me "buy" $700 worth of your stuff.

I can't pretend to be borrowing her books because she will really bug me about returning them.

People think she is my sister all the time. Since I was in college. Also, any time she had my kids, people assumed she was their mom.

Dh helped me do some good stuff today. We cut boards for my studio kids to make mold boxes, and we cut pipe to make Mason bee houses (also in my classes) and both of those things used up scrap that was lying around in the barn or yard.

SubC your mother is amazing! What a doll! And she looks so young! Your mom is my new badger when it comes to my health!!

Tillie believe it's or not, LegalZoom isn't the worst way to get a will. It will be a simple will. They can do trusts, etc, but I wouldn't use them to go beyond a simple will. As to advanced directives (assuming talking about health) then maybe start at doctor's office or hospital. They have those forms. Lastly, if you are legally married to anyone who is alive, please know that your spouse can likely force a share whether you include him or not.

I have the person in place for mom's meds. She started yesterday. I'm going to shower now and take mom a coffee, then head to consignment store yo see if I can't find a different tv table for mom. Fingers crossed.

Tillie, if there is any question of someone challenging the will you should involve a lawyer. Maybe ask senior services or try to contact a legal aid organization to see if there are free or inexpensive options?

Good morning.

Tatulia, I hope you get the help with your mom's meds soon. I think that would be very stressful for me. I have trouble remembering my own meds.

Have you taken over all of your mom's bills now?

I'm a fan of public transportation! Not that you would know, since I never use it because it doesn't go where I need to go. I so wish my city had light rail!

CM, I'm sorry you didn't get a baby bunny fix. Baby winter has been such a comfort. He is so much more snuggly than trilby.

Did you clear a bookshelf?

I'm glad if my mom could inspire you. She inspires me all the time.

Dh and I had a lovely time last night. We didn't get home until midnight and I slept nine hours! Now I feel very lazy.

I'm torn between a desire to accomplish so many things and a sense that I just need a big uninterrupted stretch with no demands. Not likely that I will get one. But instead I keep taking a middle road every weekend that gets me nowhere. Too much time online "resting" so that I stay behind and feel under pressure, and just enough work that I don't feel rested. Although, it's as much the sense of undone work hanging over me as the work I do, I should just buckle down and try to plow through it.

And stop committing to new things. Honestly, the best decision I've made all year was probably taking that reduced schedule for next year, and I'm still regretting that.

Good Morning Everyone

Sounds like you have had a good weekend so far Subclinical. :)

WTG! Tatoulia ;)

Hi CriticalMass
Sounds like you are busy and getting things done. :D


What's the best way to create a will?
I need a legally binding will and advance directives.

Hi, hope this weekend is going well for everybody. I know there have been some ups and downs but hope at least the overall trend is up.

SubC, what a lovely video of your mom. She is a very upbeat and articulate speaker. I feel even more motivated to get back to my exercising now. :)

Just putzing - my roommate and I went to McD's for breakfast, and Dollar Tree and Walmart. I only bought 3 things at DT. One was Valentine's Day socks, I'll post on IG Friday.

Back home we put together MY chrome wire shelving unit halfway. Then it went back into my van. I'll assemble the rest at the storage unit. It had been riding around in its box way too long. Time to get it into the storage somehow, and pull out the flimsy shelves it was purchased to replace.

Kitty girl enjoyed going in the empty shelving box and scuffling around.

We're getting ready to clear another of the bookshelves in my room.

This coming week I'll make more focused progress on laundry and my room. I think my head is clearer from the previous effort now. Plus I am getting tired of the room still being hard to move around in. there are some immediate fixes I can do for being able to walk thru, then keep fine tuning.

My brain was rather fried yesterday I kept being forgetful. I was late getting to the bunny house, and I had misunderstood - they didn't actually have any baby bunnies there. The babies are in two batches, one at a fosterer's and the other still at the home of whoever wanted to surrender them but that person has agreed not to as we are too full to take them.

There was one boy bunny they had taken in, an 8-month-old mini me of my boy. I trimmed his nails. And we finished the newsletter.

I took a late afternoon short catnap when I got home. It's been a cumulative tiredness week. Thursday I kept dropping things at my elderly lady's house. It got rather comical.

This week the weather pattern is so-so, nothing dramatic. Should make it to the gym and take a selfie with me and Badger to prove it.

Yesterday got the new pills and will start next week with the very gradual decrease in dosage. It feels like the moment for this. Been practicing not sweating small stuff! Exercise endorphins should help too.

Tatoulia, wtg with the sneaky strategies. And seeing the humor in it all.

Tillie, if I could I'd send the dog to chew Steven's boots... you try so hard. Sending big hugs. ♡♡♡

Okay, better go now and clear a bookshelf.

Hello everyone!


I haven't read and digested all the posts yet. SubC yay for a snow day (pity they called it so late) and I'm glad you relaxed. Sitting by the fire and reading sounds so comforting. I bet the snow was pretty.

Tillie I'm so sorry about your insomnia. That is such a terrible thing. And someone tracked in mud to make your life harder and your aggravation level higher. I'm so sorry.

Cm I'm not up to date but I believe it is a bunny day for you.

I went up to give mom her meds this AM and feed the cat and other things. I cleaned out two of her kitchen drawers, only took a picture of one of them. It's posted for your viewing. Some things I threw out, others are in a donation bag, some are for me and some for the sister. I also took everything that she wants to keep and I'll wash them here. She told me to take my time, doesn't care if it's a week. So I asked her if she's sure she won't need the ladle in the next week. (I'm evil) You know, the one she loves and needs and wants to keep. We had a nice laugh about that. The potato masher is in the solid donate pile, even though she looked like she'd be happy to use it to mash my head. As I was putting her socks on, she asked me if I could comb my hair. I said no. Not her hair, mind you, but my hair. I hadn't even had a full cup of coffee when I needed to go up there to bring her coffee and administer her meds.

So I've gotten two kitchen drawers cleared out. She told me I could put the things in the newly configured silverware drawer and I said no, I like the way the silverware drawer only has silverware in it and not a bunch of other stuff. And she said, then you can put it in one of the stainless steel bowls underneath and I said no, these things need a home. They aren't just going to sit in bowls. (Mental note, Bowls are next to go).

So ostensibly I'll wash this stuff and bring it back. Some but not a lot will come back.

Did I mention that I found out that her phone bill is $700? They haven't turned it off because she's designated as elderly. So now I get to pay that. I remember last summer she complained her bill had gone up $10 and she said she wasn't going to pay it. And I asked her to just pay it. Well now it's mine to pay.

We do not have the workers in place yet. Right now I'm giving her the meds. It is hard to work too and I'm so grateful once I'm in the office.

A friend's father died and I went to the visiting hours in Rhode Island. BF offered to drive me and I said, nope, I want the ease and stress free commute via train. And he said he'd go with me and I told him, you just need to know I'm taking the train. So we took it together and it was so easy. Very pleasant and very easy. He's finally learning how easy our public transportation is. And he marvels at it.

My cleaners will take care of mom's apt a week from Wednesday. Mom has no choice or say in this matter.

My house is nice and clean and serene and for that I am grateful. I'm grateful for your friendship.

I got feed, and pancakes, and the market bought my last 9 bars of soap to sell (and they expect to want more) But for now, just points for having the soap out of the box in the basement.

I turned the heat on in my studio. Off to work on dishes and laundry while it warms up.

Good morning.

I never got around to catch up/ get ahead on school yesterday.

I did run one load of dishes - about two to go. And I put away a lot of laundry and ran some. Getting caught up on laundry today shouldn't be a problem.

I spent a lot of time sitting in front of the fire reading a book.

I really needed a snow day. Went to bed early and slept a solid eight hours.

This morning I'm hoping to go to the little farmer's market store. They only have preserved food now, but they have really good homemade pancakes and I need to buy feed near there. I want pancakes for breakfast!

Dh and I have a concert date tonight, and in between hopefully laundry, dishes, school stuff, and working in my studio.

It's snowing again, but not as much as yesterday.

Just 4pm here.
Vacuumed all around the carpet because somebody tracked mud on his shoes all through the house. >:(
House rule number one is NO SHOES IN THE HOUSE.
I want to hurt him for being that way.

Made some egg salad for sandwiches then cleaned the kitchen.

Scooped litter boxes, took out the trash.

It's not much but it's more that I did yesterday.

Good Morning Everybody
Doing a bit better today...

Hi CriticalMass
Hope you are having a good time today snuggling bunnies and hugging those babies.
Wishing you all the best on reducing that med and for working on not sweating the small stuff.
Badger is looking forward to working out at the gym with you. ;D

Hi Subclinical
YEA! A snow day!!!
I can't seem to get warm too and my dishes have piled up.
Wishing you loads of luck catching up and getting ahead today. ;)

Snow day!

They waited so long to call it that I had to stop to read the alert on my phone and then turn around and come back home.

But it's a snow day!

And dh is working from home.

The snow reflects what little light there is, which helps do much, and we are going to keep the fire going.

Planning to use the time to clean up (dishes already running) relax, and catch up/get ahead a little on school things.

Wish me luck!

Good morning.

Tillie, I'm sorry you had a rough day.

I've been up since 4:30, watching it snow by the porch light, wondering if it will affect school today. We're not supposed to get much, but it rained and then froze before this started. The roads worry me a bit. Mr. kitty is fascinated by the snowflakes.

CM, I am hoping very hard that this med change will be a good thing for you.

Badger says go to the gym. So does my mom - she was on tv this week. I am going to try to post a link:

http://www.delmarvalife.com/paidcontent/paid-content-by-prmc-meet-participants-of-the-cardiac-rehab-program/

Unfortunately, I take after my dad. In many ways. Half my life has been a struggle to be my mom instead.

It has been a rough week. The sun they promised me tomorrow has been postponed until Tuesday. My house has become a wreck again. The dishes have piled up. I feel cold all the time.

I'm sorry to complain. It just helps a little to have people who understand that some days taking a shower and putting on clothes is a major achievement all by itself.

Good Evening Everyone

Been a rough day.
Woke up at 3am and couldn't get back to sleep.
Been dragging trying to function all day.
Tried to take a nap but could only manage to sleep 20 minutes.

Ah, SubC, the mothering instinct is strong in you. I understand to at least a certain extent even though I never got to be a biological or adoptive mother in the conventional sense. But the nurturing instinct - that is something as women we should be proud of. It can sometimes be wrenching as well.

Hopefully the kids will get another teacher as nice as you and they will be fine. Give your heart time to catch up to where your head already knows you are doing the right thing. Because we can't be Superwoman - as much as we want to be at times!

Hi Tillie and Tatoulia and Tess - hoping things have settled down with your challenges. Tatoulia, that's great that the onus of getting your mom to accept more help is not all on you now. I think she will get used to it and maybe even come to like it in time. I'm going to sit with my elderly lady today. I remember when she first came home from rehab after her head injury. She was so independent; it was very difficult for her to be told what she could and couldn't do in her own home. But in time she adjusted.

I'm working on the bunny club newsletter, going to go over to their house tomorrow and trim toenails and finish up the newsletter. There have been so many new bunnies and my list of who is ready to be adopted is out of date. I need some photos and names, and of course a chance to pet and coo over them. And to see the BABIES... *squee!*

Got through my (psych) doctor appt yesterday - I like her but I wish I didn't need to go. However, we are going to embark on reducing my dose of antidepressant, the one that causes weight gain and bad dreams. Yay! I'll go down really slowly and hopefully not notice. It's more for OCD than depression with me, and I think I've done some good things with positive reprogramming of my brain, and supplements, so I feel optimistic about this. I can't even remember when the dose got increased; I'm thinking it might've been after my dad died. That was a more extreme time.

Later on, I might also be able to reduce the anti-anxiety medication. I have tapered it a bit on my own the last few years.

Mainly I just have to be chill, and really practice the mantra of "Don't sweat the small stuff." Because I do so often worry and fret over stuff that doesn't amount to a hill of beans. It's time to make a conscious, mindful decision that by the grace of God, I'm not going to do that! And if I backslide, no self-flagellation, just get back up and keep going.

Well, I better go wash my hair and other things to prepare for the day with my lady. Hoping next week will be a good project-ing week, for decluttering and laundry and other catch up tasks. Maybe will get some done on weekend. Weather is so-so, sun today and for some of the days to come. Better than it has been, I think, even if not springlike just yet.

I'm going to start a plan to get to the gym. BRING ON THE BADGER! I've gained about 5 more pounds over the winter, when I had already been trying to re-lose the 12 or so I regained from the 30 I lost in 2016. (Don't try to follow that, there won't be a quiz - I know what I have to do, LOL.) The gym is not all just about weight loss but I have gotten kind of bleh with muscles and so on. And I can definitely use the endorphins.

In short, no pressure, make it fun - but (this is where the Badger comes in) at least DO IT. More than once. Thanks in Advance for siccing the Badger as needed.

No, I asked my boss to hire someone better to teach my language arts classes. And she cancelled them. So they will now have the same options they were struggling with last year. And I will not teach the disappointed boy at all because he will not take the subjects I offer for his age - they are electives and not in his areas of interest.

I am choosing myself and my grandchild over these kids. Period. Full stop. My brain tells me it is the right thing to do, but it feels bad.

I still believe that what these kids need is too much for me, that I am failing them a little. I wanted them to have a better option. But Instead I am taking away what might have been the best of the not good enough options.

I bought two metal trash cans yesterday to protect the feed from the rats. I forgot to say that.

Good Evening Everyone

Sorry the sun won't shine on you Subclinical. :(
Looks like there won't be much sunshine the next several days.
But, this weekend will be a huge beautiful moon you may get a glimpse of if the clouds cooperate.

Chocolate is a great remedy for the blues of any kind.
I try to keep some of that dark unsweetened stuff on hand for emergencies.

You are not abandoning the kids.
You are giving them more quality time (((HUG)))

Good luck baby rabbits!

Tatoulia, I hope your mom will accept the five days on Dr.'s orders. That would be so great!

I told you I decided not to teach language arts next year, right?

Yesterday we had a language arts teachers meeting about placement and the options for next year that made me feel like I am abandoning my kids. And today a parent wrote and told me how disappointed her son is that I won't be offering a class for him again next year.

And the sun won't come out and I am feeling very low.

I ate a candy bar. It made me feel better in the moment, but tomorrow I'll be sorry.

I discovered that slices of hard boiled eggs in the lasagna tastes really good and is a protein source.

I am happy you negotiated those 2 days for your Mom's helpers because I knew that was a way to get your foot into her door to get her all the help she really needs.
Even though she doesn't think so. ;)

WTG! for having a let-Go bag started!!!
What works best for me is to have all like things together and can see them all at once.
Because to decide on a white blouse while looking only at that blouse makes me think that maybe I should keep it.
But looking at 5 white blouses reassures me that it's alright to let that one blouse go.

One problem I have is that I have never been hard on my clothes/shoes and wear them until they are thread bare.
But now when I have something new and in great condition I must force myself to retire that old sad item.

Right now I have 25 blouses/tops and 19 dresses.
Spring into Autumn I mostly only wear dresses.
Late Autumn into Late Spring I mostly wear jeans and blouses.
I have 2 skirts and wear blouses with them too.
I have plenty of clothes. ;p
Doing good with shoes, moccasins, sandals & slippers too.
Also have a nice selection of nightgowns/robes and unmentionables.
I have clothes for every occasion unless I get called for jury duty, I would need to buy some hose because I would feel wrong with bare legs in a courtroom.

SubC, I'm sorry your feelings are hurt. I try to remember that it's how the person is feeling that counts, not how they *should* be feeling or how I want them to feel. Hurt feelings are tough to deal with. We are standing by your side and shoring you up!

Cm all those baby bunnies!!! I hope you can find everyone a home. What a shocker on the weather. We too had unseasonably warm weather recently and although delightful, in truth, it's terrible. Congratulations on the Super Bowl win! I enjoyed my meatball parm sub while the boys ate wings and pizza.

Cm I'm proud of you for getting so much done and forging ahead with more work in your bedroom! You are helping me to forge ahead with more changes.

Tillie! I'm working on a let-go bag too. I'm really happy about it. And I can picture you assessing things so practically and I will use your thought-processes as I do the same. Great job helping me organize my thoughts on why I can't buy that blouse.

Mom had a full assessment yesterday. Head to toe. Mental, physical and emotional. And guess what? Dr says she needs help twice a day FIVE days a week (my preference) and not the two days a week I'd had negotiated with mom. They don't have her people set up yet but someone did come in today to make her bed. I need to remind them to have the nurse administer the meds since I keep finding pills everywhere.

My cleaners cane today and in two weeks, they will do my house then mom's. Mom has no say in it.

I'm doing a bit of laundry now.

I was brave, SubC, and I went to work yesterday. And I was glad for it. You and BF really encourages me and I'm grateful to you both!

I posted a picture of my bed today. I love how it looks when the cleaners have been in. I can't make it look that smooth.

Lasagna for dinner? I'm thinking about making lasagna. I don't have any meat but meatless will work just fine.

Good Morning Everyone

Hi CriticalMass
WTG! for all the progress you have made on your room!!!
Good luck at the doctor tomorrow.
Be extra safe with any Winter storms that come your way.
Drive slow, take your time, leave early and don't rush.

So depressing to think of all the poor little homeless waifs in all the shelters across the lands.
Have fun clipping nails and loving on the bunnies. :)
My Cottontail Bunnies use their nails to get good traction for running away from predators and for fighting if they get caught.


Extremely cold here and won't be warming up anytime soon.
Gray overcast day.
Things are still frozen solid and icy.
Not planning on driving anywhere but I need to start the car today to keep the battery charged.
Went through my clothes yesterday.
Found some things to let go.
Straightened my drawers as I put stuff back.

We broke a high temperature record here on Sunday, and the Chiefs won the Super Bowl. Then we returned to our regularly scheduled winter. Today was not as cold as it might've been, but it was plenty cold enough for me.

Tomorrow is my doctor appointment on the other side of town, and I'll stop off a place or two if possible. There is some chance of snow, though, so if that precludes much meandering, I'll just head back.

Thursday I go in the afternoon and evening to sit with my older lady friend.

It's time again to edit the bunny club newsletter. We have our event Sunday the 16th. And I'm going to trim toenails of the shelter bunnies.

They got in baby bunnies... which are no doubt adorable but I don't know how they're going to deal with babies on top of an already large number of rabbits. I pray we can find some adopters and some donors of funds to feed and care for everyone. We seem to have gotten the word out to folks who want to surrender bunnies quite well.

Next week, I'm hoping to be home more. And for confidence, motivation, and energy to tackle the bedroom again. Having a third to a half done is great, but you know how it is - must keep hacking away at the undergrowth, or it will grow and take over again.

Good Afternoon

3pm here & I just finished lunch.

So cold today.
Mostly sunny but with some high clouds developing.
Don't think it will get above 32 degrees today.
Overnight was so cold that I kept the cabinet doors under the sinks open to try to prevent freezing plumbing, it worked.
Tonight will be the same.

Good Morning Everyone

Hi Subclinical
I'm very happy you are working on minimizing your goat chores! ;D
One less stall for now will make a nice difference.
WTG! for a better work schedule for you and your needs!

So sorry your feelings are not being taken more seriously.
We feel what we feel and not being validated really hurts. (((HUG)))


Hi Tatoulia
YEA! for resisting that pretty blouse.
Always keep in mind that a new purchase must meet all your criteria.
Tiny "cap" sleeves are not on your list. ;)

So relieved that things are going to change and your Mom will be getting more helpers. (((HUG)))

WTG! for washing away so much more than just dirt by doing laundry!

Tatoulia, it totally made sense that you would think that from what I wrote.

Be brave, go in to work.

The weather gods say we won't see the sun here until Saturday. I shall put my head down and push through.

I am fighting with dh about something stupid. But that is not what the fight is about. The fight is about me feeling like he is putting someone else being slightly unhappy or offended over me feeling very unhappy. And the other person is eventually going to have to be confronted, but dh wants to do it next week after the person has a chance to make me even more unhappy because he thinks it will go easier. And that I should just let it go because it will all be fine in the end. (And it probably will, but meanwhile I can't help what I FEEL.)

That's a great challenge, SubC. I'm sorry my brain isn't following the way it should. I am a little glazed over.

I think the things to make my life easier will be to get mom organized and get rid of 10 bags of stuff.

I don't want to go to work I want to sleep but I've showered so I should go in

Welcome Shadiw!

Tatoulia, I'm glad you are getting things straightened out for your mom. Your plan sounds good.

Goid job not buying the blouse!

The "40 things..." isn't a class, it's a February challenge on another web site. I have to come up with the things myself. So far I just have the one of not teaching the class so my schedule is better. I bet I end up with about five things 🙄. But at least I am looking out for them.

Actually, I put the wethers out with the girls and stuck the two bucks in together now that it isn't breeding season, so that will give me one fewer stall to clean and longer until I have to go buy hay again, so I think it counts. It's routine, but it's the sort of routine that only takes a few minutes but I never seem to get to until I need the stall.

Not ready for class today, so I gotta do that!

I bet the blizzard was fun, Tillie, esp since it was short-lived. Hoping the temperature warms up and melts the ice! Now you have a cat named Shadow, too! Great fun!

SubC I am so proud of you for making positive changes! And for banking your raise! Well done! I'm still spending and need that to stop. I did stop it in it's tracks sometime this weekend when I almost bought a pretty steel blue lace blouse. I don't need it and would only wear it with a suit since the sleeves were just cap sleeves. I prefer 3/4 length sleeves on everything.

I didn't do much here today and I'm fact I'm too exhausted to get the garbage together tonight. Such is life.

Went to mom's six times. BF went with me twice. I met with the director to arrange her medication administration each day. I called her nurse and talked about what services I would like to see. Mom also met with someone and had stayed she wants someone trice a week to make her breakfast and help her with some things and then twice a week in the evenings to bathe her. I'm good with that.

I did laundry laundry laundry today. I got mom's nighties washed and folded and returned.

I did every piece of laundry I have.

I'm going to bed now. I'll let everything else fall into place tmr.

We took Tigger to the vet tonight and then I decided to walk home. He's too skinny for us to carry him around. He doesn't have enough meat to keep him warm. Then BF and I went for dinner then visited with mom. The second time we went over, we brought her twelve waters. She seems to be much improved with all the water I gave her drinking right now. Clearer mentally. And our relationship is back on track.

So I'm off to bed. I'm
Proud of you, SubC, you are taking good care of yourself. And I'm excited about your class!!!

Just about 1:30pm and I just had some lunch.

The sun has been shining brightly in the cloudless sky.
But it's so freezing out there!
Snow/ice has melted off some areas but not all.
Still very slippery.
Jack and little Cow Girl came by for some canned cat food.

The other night I turned on the front porch light to look out.
At first I thought I saw no animals but right in front of me was a big cat.
He had very long fur and was solid gray.
So hard to see, looked like a shadow. ;D
He was enjoying the cat mint (catnip) in my garden.