| Erin | Posted: 29 September 2012 - 03:26 PM |
Hi... I found this website doing a bit of searching online while I was 'taking a break' after cleaning up for a move (in a few days)... Which, basically means I put the tiniest dent in the massive amount of work I need to do before moving and I'm putting it off because I feel overwhelmed and scared. I'm a single mom - I live in Nebraska, and my son is eight. We also have an eleven year old cat and a six year old dog. As long as I can remember, I've held attachments for 'things' better than for people. Its not that I can't love people, and don't think they're important, and its not that I'm selfish or lazy. I don't know why I am this way, and no one seems to understand. I've been this way as long as I can remember. I have... Maybe eight days to get my house cleaned and packed for moving. I live in a trailer house, and its not as 'bad' as I've seen. I can still walk around, and its not horrible dirty, but... It feels like a massive amount of work and I don't know how to handle it on my own. We'll be moving into a bigger, much nicer trailer house. (Sorta handed down thru the family to me) And I'm horribly scared that I'll mess this up too. I finally got my mother to understand, perhaps, what's going on with me when I told her that it scared me, that I didn't know where to begin, because I thought I might have a problem. (The way I said it makes me almost feel guilty. 'Mom, I might have the form of OCD associated with hoarding, and I don't know what to do.') On a single mom's budget, I can't go see a therapist. I live in a rural area. I quite literally have zero money to spend on things that aren't an absolute necessity. And yet I do stupid things like going to the Dollar store to find 'good deals' on things I don't even need... Any tips, tricks, or just understanding would be appreciated right now. How do I 'speed clean' and pack the things I'm keeping, all by myself, around working 40+ hours a week and taking care of my son and the 'furkids', without feeling like I'm losing everything? | |
Replies (3)
| Patti | Posted: 30 September 2012 - 10:09 PM |
Hi Erin, Patti | |
| Erin | Posted: 29 September 2012 - 10:02 PM |
I haven't been given a real 'time schedule' for when I move out. But I don't want to have to pay another month's rent on the place I currently live in if I don't have to, so the sooner I can get moved out, the better. My mother has offered to help, several times. I'm just afraid she'll get into the house and say something to 'mess' the foreward step up. She's always been bad about, 'If I'm helping, we're doing it my way.' or making little comments that she doesn't seem to realize dig really deep. Its already an emotional, scary thing, and my mother and I have never been all that close, and I keep telling her, 'When I get it looking better, when things are clean, then you can come and help.' Compounding the issue... In 2006 (New Year's Eve, actually) I fractured my L1 vertibrae. I didn't actually 'hurt' my spinal chord, but, my back has never been the same. I have more migraine days than non migraine days, and I have a lot of joint pain due to being overweight and having hypermobility type 3. I work five days a week and get off work and home, and I'm barely able to walk, much less pack things and clean. Tho, tonight, I took FOUR boxes of stuff to GoodWill (Clothes, mostly) and I bagged up two bags of trash and I packed up two boxes of stuff for moving, and two trash bags of clothes to just cart off for moving. My son and I have enough clothing and bath stuff in three or four suitcases to 'live' for a couple of weeks, and I want to whittle things down so boxes of stuff are packed for moving, or taken away to goodwill or the dump and all we really have out other than furniture and bath stuff (and food) is whats in the suitcases. I can move stuff to my new place already, so I've been gradually moving boxes there to get them out of the way. Its just a lot of work, driving a 20+ mile round trip between houses all the time. Thank you, so very much for the warm welcome! I saw that, about Sunday and Tuesday nights, so I'm hoping I can start making one or the other part of my regular weekly routine. When we get moved and settled in, I want to have basically a 'chore chart' for me and kiddo. Mark a chore off as it gets done, and STAY ON SCHEDULE, and get things done and keep up with everything so things don't get bad again. Is that too lofty of a goal? | |
| Sheryl | Posted: 29 September 2012 - 07:30 PM |
Hi Erin! 🙂 Welcome & {{HUGS}} Is your "right now" goal to get moved in eight days? Will your mom help you? Are you OK asking others to help as long as they don't toss anything in the trash? If yes - ask for help! You can do this, and please don't be ashamed or feel guilty. Let's get you through the move, then work on addressing the stuff and finding a therapist - perhaps through a university graduate program! Sunday evening is a online support group (red box to your right) - check that box for the start time in your time-zone. You are welcome there, and can use any alias/name you wish. Tuesday evening is a different type of support group (peer support) and once again, same box, look for the start time in for your time zone. 24/7 message board support, here. You can do this & you have already made your first step! 🙂 Sheryl | |