Checking in. Write if you can. Thinking of you and your mom.

Gem,

I am sorry things have gone from what looked like some possible support to a group of people taking complete control over you and your Moms lives. I will keep you two in my thoughts and hope that somehow someway things end with you two being empowered and stronger with more supports that so many should be ashamed of themselves for not offering over the years of your asking.

You are not alone and I know how isolating this is and cannot even imagine with your severe circumstances.

Are you sure they are planning to clean your place out now with you guys not there and that the cleaning they did that day was not just to help make way to get your Mom to the hospital? If it is of any comfort, I understand the fear of going into nursing care with the concern of not being able to return home. I have seen it with very severe cases and he person returned home even though they were unable to walk unaided(with of course the assistance of home health care). Hope that is what will be possible and plan. Go with it as though it is, as like Joan said and your concerns are....if they have an agenda that is not in your best interest it is best not to add more fuel to it.

You are NOT alone. Know there are people in this world thinking of you here. Not judging you. Who are wanting to see you and your Mom returned home with the proper supports in place(and be and stay in control of how your personal belongings are handled).

Easy to say here I know, although while this is super scary and emotional in all ways...keep the faith. Do not ever give up. Never let hope be taken in the darkest of times. Hopefully the agenda is about empowering you two, although again I agree with Joan and your fears...also knowing that the system and those with experience to help just do not seem set up to do so in a way that mostly seems to be humane, kind, caring, empowering and being of service.

What a traumatic story... I will keep checking in here as will others because you are in our thoughts and while you may not have physical friends and family, you have us. Do not let anyone make you feel less because of that, as it is the very outcome of the sever circumstances you have fallen.

HUGS HUGS HUGS

G xx y here I know, although while this is super scary and emotional ierience to help just do not seem set up to do so in a way that mostly seems to be humane, kind, caring, empowering and being of service.

What a traumatic story... I will keep checking in here as will others because you are in our thoughts and while you may not have physical friends and family, you have us. Do not let anyone make you feel less because of that, as it is the very outcome of the sever circumstances you have fallen.

HUGS HUGS HUGS

G xx

Sending you my support from afar, Gem. So very sorry about all of this. Please keep us posted.

Gem, you don't know me, but I have been following your posts for a few weeks. I know how these systems work against people. My advice to you is to get a lawyer, pronto. ! ! ! You are entitled to a lawyer if they have strong-armed you into the "mental health" system. ! ! !

If you cannot get them to divulge which agency you should contact for free legal representation, search under mental health legal services for your state. NAMI (The National Alliance for the Mentally Ill) is a nationwide nonprofit with a legal assistance hotline, but their response will be slower. Let me know how you make out.

Good luck.

This is long so bear with me. 🙁

So here I am at 3:15am ct in the hospital bed alone typing this message while watching Big Brother After Dark worrying about what the hell they are going to do to us next. Sorry this is so long. I didn't get up to this room until after 10pm.

Well, shoot, I made a post but it didn't "stick." Anyway, just to send hugs. Could you bring yourself to tell the social worker how you felt? Maybe he had other pressures on him that didn't permit him to stick around or return?

I think it is important that you perhaps think about what you can do in the future to meet other people and form friendships so you do not feel all alone.

Hugs

Oh Gem...it is so very harsh is so many ways. You take as good care of you as you can and I am soooo sorry for all you are going through and the upset on top of what was already not ok.....both for you and you Mom.

Thanks for posting and hang in there. It is hard not being in control, especially when so much is out of control. No one knows who is not in your shoes....

HUGS
G
xxo

Thank you to everyone for being so caring and supportive. When the social worker and his co-worker came out to tell me on Friday my Mom had no idea they were doing so and didn't even ask her permission. She's not happy about that fact.

My Mom is still in the hospital. There's supposed to me some sort of meeting with the guardian, social worker and others tomorrow somewhere and they are going to discuss how they are and can help us. It just hurts that the social worker thought it was fine to only spend 5 min when he came to tell me about my Mom and then not to show up or call at all afterwards over the weekend and then again today when it was clear to him and his co-worker that I was upset when they left.

it was supposed to say great big HUGE hugs for you and your Mom(sorry about the technical difficulties....

xxox

Gem, I too am very sorry to hear about this news with your Mom. Thank you for sharing with us and staying in touch. After all the hard work to get someone to help and realize you need help, it is very sad to also find out this new news with your Mom I am sure. Glad it sounds like there are now people who are there and want to help, as well as people who are upset at how your many efforts were responded to. Maybe just maybe whatever the outcome will be for you Mom, it will be more supported now that there are what appears to be supportive people who know your guys circumstances involved.

I too will keep you in my thoughts and hope you come back to chat to share maybe for Sunday meeting? We ARE here for you and as much as I know this is all very scary and overwhelming......please keep us updated here.

May everything that cannot be changed be supported and helped with as much kindness as possible. For anything that can be changed! I wish from the bottom of my heart for the kindest most skilled patient and understanding support.

Great big HUGE huge for you and your Mom......

G
xxox

G\((Gem)) I know you are hurting and I wish I could help. If it can help, rely upon us here at the board. There may be also other online groups or boards in which you could get involved, or if possible, a real-life support group.

I am actually very heartened to hear about the kind of support your are now getting. Remember that it is true that "this, too, shall pass." What can we do to help you feel not so alone?

Gem, I'm so sorry to hear that news about your mom. I'm also sorry that you didn't have much emotional support right after you got the news. I'll be thinking about you both!

Well our lawyer for the house and the court guardian came to the door Wednesday and after some prodding I let the guardian in. She was nice about it all and even if she was disgusted she didn't show it. The lawyer stayed outside I think he could tell how scared I was about just letting the guardian in.

I don't know what to do. I'm so scared. I know I shouldn't worry about something that hasn't happened yet confirmation I mean. When the social worker and his co-worker from the MH kinda came, told me and I started crying and then left I was just stunned. He said he'd be back tomorrow when he could spend more time with me but it kind of hurt to be left alone so quickly with that kind of information being so fresh.

Gem, I also don't want you to think badly of yourself. I don't hear you make excuses.

Gem, I don't think you're trying to make excuses. Yeah, I understand about the frustration with the "outside person" thing. I think that part of the problem is the "theme" of this particular season of the show.

Instead of thinking of this as "begging," think of it as persistence. I'm hoping that your persistence is eventually going to pay off in terms of some kind of help! Sometimes, help comes at surprising times and in surprising ways.

I'm glad to see you've posted. I was thinking about you earlier today! I don't know about your blood relative situation, but you have a "heart family" out here who is thinking about you and is cheering you on in this difficult situation.

I know it sounds like all I do is make up excuses and I'm sorry about that. The producer wants to contact the people I tried asking about the show but I don't want them to think I begged the producer to try and get them to agree. I wish having an outside person wasn't a requirement. I don't want my Mom and I to have to go on TV to get help. Really just ready to give up everything.

Nobody that I called ever called back. I didn't get a name for the lady at the health department. I think I'm going to try calling there today and see if I can get the same lady. Here's to hoping I remember her voice. Cory referred us to some cleanup company that's not really near here but said would try and work with us. After I sent pictures though that place said my best bet was the TV show because they would charge us $10,000 to $15,000 or more.

The TV show seemed like it was our last hope but it doesn't seem like that's going to work out either because we don't have any friends or family to drag onto the show with us. We just want this stuff out of here so bad. Some of it has been falling and when you try and pick it up more falls. I'm a member of a group about this on FB and had to quit responding there because people kept telling me all I did was make up excuses. I don't know if they didn't get how bad it is or didn't believe the health issues my Mom and I have. I was honest with them but some of the stuff they were suggesting wasn't possible. It gets so tiring having to explain things in such detail and even then so many people don't get it.

Just popping in to say hello. Write when you can--no pressure--just want you to know I'm thinking of you!

Ditto to what Tatoulia said!

You have friends here who are cheering for you! (I wish I were in a position to do more than just "cheer" at the moment!)

Great work, Gem! You did a lot on Friday! Congratulations on your hard work and for not giving up when the going got tough! I am happy you posted. Keep up the good work and keep us posted! I am right by your side. I sure your mother is very proud of your perseverance.

Friday I called places and got varying results.

I'm just scared about tomorrow and feel like I'm on death row and my execution is tomorrow. I'm doing the best I can to make my Mom's Mother's Day somewhat enjoyable though.

Hi Gem, just checking in. Write when you can.

Oh Gem my heart breaks for you. I am so sorry that this happened today. Please, it is not your fault and you shouldn't be afraid to post here. I'm so glad that you did. You and your mother have a serious situation and no one should yell at you or abuse you. I don't know what to say to you. this must've been very frightening for you and your mother. It sounds like the police escalated the matter when you needed some compassion. That is unfair to you and to your mother.

I am so sorry about all of this. Thank you so much for posting. I don't know anything about the show's requirements or screening process but am praying you find help. Real help, not just some jerk yelling at you.

Please, please keep us posted. And know that if I could swoop in and help, I would. And if I knew the righ thing to say, I'd say it. But for now, just know that I am standing by your side and I am so glad you wrote,

I tried calling the Ph.D guy listed for Mississippi under the listing here and got the respatory department of the hospital he was supposed to be at. The gal hung up on me when I tried to explain who I was calling.

http://djournal.com/obituaries/obituaries-june-4-2009/

My fault for waiting I know this so please don't tell me that in any replies. I've been kicked and verbally abused enough today.

I don't want to go to jail. I'm too sick for jail. They think because I can stand up and talk to them that I'm fine and should have been able to prevent all of this.

Hi Gem
I read through some of the post but not all as there is many and i don't have much time.
I have recently reached out to hoarders tv show for help with a friend. I have to say these people are very helpful and they are not out to make you in a worst place. They actually need people in a crisis so from what I have read you guys would be a great case for them. We actually start taping this week, just like you I did NOT want to be on TV. But in the end I had to let my self pride go to help another get in a better and safer place in life. They will NOT make you homeless no take your mother away. THEY DO NOT INVOLVE ANY CITY OR STATE WORKERS. They offer out help after they are gone too. I would really reconsider you decision not to reach out to them. I think you will be happy with everyone you come into contact with that is apart of this show, as they are very nice and only want whats best for you. They are very helpful and do put a lot of money into helping you get back to normal. I am grateful that we have this opportunity to help my friend.
As I can you see you have called many places for help and there is none and the cost to cover it yourself is not in reach. Your mother and you need a safe house to live in. Please email Hoarders your story. As they just got picked back up by another network so they would probably be able to come very quickly. They receive thousands of stories daily so you will be very luck to be picked. Again you need to be in a crisis so do not hold back with your story. They will come and help you if you will allow them. Best of luck to you and remember who cares what others think. This show is only an hour long and most that watch it you will never see, they are across the whole country. The only thing that matters is you and your mother being safe.
PS I read about your mother opening the fridge at night. Go buy a lock that you can add to the fridge/freezer at night time so you will not have to worry about food going bad.
We can all better ourselves one way or another. Look for a positive and stay focused on that. Our self pride is not worth losing the help they can offer out. Again apply to hoarders, at least talk to them and see what they have to say first, before you make a call that you don't want their help.
Best of luck to you and your mother!!!

I found this for Gulfport, if that's useful. You would have to ask Cory if he has any comments about the company (ies).

http://www.junkbusters.org/junk-removal-prices.php

There is a national organization called Love, Inc. that has affiliates in a few communities around the country. I do not see any listed for Mississipi. There is one listed in Lafayette LA. You could try contacting them and see if they are aware of any groups in Southern Mississipi that do a similar type of thing.