When I was at my worst and could not afford a clean up service, I contacted local missions, churches and even the local municipal court for referrals for non-violent offenders who had to do community service. If and when your mom can get some therapy and accept help, community help IS out there. It might take 20 phone calls, but eventually someone will step up to the plate. One of the best helpers I had was a woman just out of prison. She needed to be able to prove that she could be trusted and was willing to work for free just to get referrals to take to future employers. I was so impressed that she was willing to do whatever it took to get back on her feet. I feel for you as you have a new little one coming into your life soon and it is hard for you to feel so torn right now. Don't give up hope... just keep making calls or better yet... type up a letter that you can send to various churches, missions, agencies, etc.(so you don't have to tell the same story over and over).

Your mother is truly in a bad place it sounds like, both physically and mentally. You say she won't let you throw anything away, but she would rather die than live like this? Does that mean she does at least admit that the way she is living is wrong? Does she ask for help cleaning her home other than when she can't find something? Does her plumbing not work?

Your mother has been through a lot and she is in severe need of therapy to deal with all of these problems. Is there any way she would agree to go? Give me a little feel for where she is at and we will see what we can recommend.

My mother needs help!! I've tried and tried to clean her house and room.. she works 12 hour shifts in a behavior health unit she lost her husband in 2004 tragically and she recently was told by my sister that he molested her. He spent thousands and thousands of her hard earned money she complains all the time how she could have bought a nice new house and not have to live in a dump. She has too many cats and refuses to get rid of any, her room is waist high with letters clothes, and trash, she's severly depressed and I don't know how to help her. The other rooms in the house have my brothers and sisters stuff that she wont let us get rid of the room I lived in now has black mold in the closet. I recently.. today actually.. was looking for an important letter she needed, my husband and I sorted through a pile by her bed which is where she said it was, we threw away pop cans, envelopes with nothing in them and nothing with her name on it so her identity won't get taken and she wouldn't even let us throw away the bags we had to put them in the garage. I'm pregnant so I really can't help her right now I've cleaned and cleaned she just never changes she is just so stressed out and my sisters and brothers don't even help it seems like they don't care, my husband cares more than them. She says she would rather end her life then have to keep living like this! Please Please help us!!