Hi Patrick, Thank you for your email (Thanks Diane for referring him to me). I figured it would be best to respond here so others could benefit from our conversation as well. So many families go through this so might aw well help as many as possible. I think your plan was very well thought out and it sounds amazing. The only downside is you all are thinking like very well organized people and so outlining every detail sounds great...on paper. The real problem is that your parents will not be able to move that quickly, with decision making and seeing all of their stuff "go". Now, I don't know them so I could be completely wrong, but I am very afraid this will all get set up and then your mother and/or father will try to back out, or will become frustrated and try to stop the entire process either before it starts or right in the middle. If this happens, you either walk away, or continue plugging away, but either of those options will have terrible consequences. I strongly urge you to do the initial sorting in the house, just like we do on every home we go to. Why touch every twice, and move it two or three times? Test the process with your parents to see if they are willing to actually go through with it before you invest so much time and money into it. I know the goal is to have them living in a safe and functional house, but more harm can be done it not done correctly. It just sounds like a huge production, that will most likely scare your mother to death when it is actually go time. I have a lot more to say but this will get very lengthy so feel free to call me at 1-800-HOARDERS any time.
Patrick
Posted: 09 December 2014 - 10:56 AM
Hi Dianne,
Thanks for the kind reply.
Fortunately, we have a commitment from everyone, including my parents, to implement this plan.
Also, my parents go away in January for a few months to escape the cold; so they are willing to put this off in order to complete this project.
You raise some really good points regarding time allocation and security. We will address those issues with a better plan.
Thanks again for your feedback, Patrick
Dianne
Posted: 09 December 2014 - 08:17 AM
Patrick, that sounds like an excellent plan.
Here are some things to consider ~
Are your parents willing to tackle this challenge as you have outlined?
Phase 1 in 48 hours ~ will that be enough time for the wives to organize everything off-site?
IMO 2 or 3 days for your parents, especially your mother, to go thru everything and make decisions may not be enough time. Even with your motivation and management she will be going thru a lot of emotions and may become nostalgic, sad, angry, resistant. Rushing her thru the process may backfire. Much of hoard clean-up won't always seem rational. There are mental and emotional aspects to it that you need to be aware of.
Getting the house cleaned and freshened will be a huge help to them.
Asking your parents to manage their own estate sale might present some problems. Since your father runs his own company and works so much with that, will he have the time or interest in spending 2 weeks selling things? Will your mom really be able to sell or will she start handling objects and setting them aside because she decides she can't part with them after all? Will their be any supervision from the kids during that process?
My personal concerns would be their age and the strangers who would be coming to see what's advertised. Do you have a lot of valuables that would attract unwanted attention? Will your parents be handling a lot of cash sales? Bottom line, will they be safe?
Your plans sound well thought out and professional. The person to get the best advice from is Cory Chalmers who runs this site. You can email him at ~~
cchalmers@1800hoarders.com
Reference this site in your subject line.
Your parents are blessed to have family members who can provide so much help. Best of luck to you ~ Dianne
Patrick
Posted: 08 December 2014 - 04:16 PM
My parents, who are in there late 60s; who raised five kids, still live in the same beautiful home after 40 years. After 40 years of memories and a mother who likes to shop; the house is filled to the brim with stuff.
My mother; who is retired due to health issues; is simply overwhelmed and cannot seem to organize this house. My father; who retired early but started his own company; works all the time and assists but not enough.
My parents and each of us have tried to help - tackle a room here; a closet there; a cupboard; we have cleaned up the garage, the basement - but we just cannot make a dent. Simply put - my mother does not know how to maintain a home and my father does not care.
So, my siblings and I can no longer sit idly by and watch this happen to my parents. My parents are going to build a new home in the next two years; and regardless; we are going to have to empty this house sooner or later. Why not do it now so that my parents can focus on other things instead of be depressed about the house all the time and complain to us?
So, part of the problem we seem to have when we clean is --- > we have no place to organize the stuff: what to keep; what to sell; what to donate; and what to discard. So, we decided we would try to rent either a vacant store or a house and organize off site. Once secured; we would kick off our plan:
Phase 1 - 48 hours - the five kids and their partners completely empty the house, (minus the furniture on all floors and the clothes in my parents closet); we empty all bedrooms, the attic (old decorations, old kids toys, etc.); the basement, and the shed.
While the husbands are emptying the house; the wives will be organizing all the stuff OFF site.
Once everything is out and organized - Mom/Dad goes through everything and decides what to keep, sell, or trash. We give them no more than two to three days for this phase and we motivate and manage every second of it...
While they are sifting through the stuff; the guys will go back to the house - completely clean each bedroom, the basement, the shed, and the garage - tear out any carpeting; paint; have hardwood floors redone - bathrooms refreshed - and prepped.
Then for the next 2 weeks - instead of going to Florida for three months like my parents always do in the winter time; my parents will man the store or apt and have an estate sell - and sell the stuff they no longer want or need. When done - whatever is left - we donate.
We would use Facebook, Craigslist, etsy, eBay and other FREE resources to advertise. We would also place an advertisement in local newspapers and highlight all the brand name stuff to catch attention.
What are your thoughts or feedback on this plan?
We know it will cost money to rent the space - whatever we decide to use - we have the manpower to empty the house - we know we would likely need some insurance or permits for the temporary store/space - what are we missing? Is there an easier way?
It's a big project - but I'm determined to make it work.
