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Hoarding Help Message Boards : Motivation Needed? : Small statements, big impact
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Small statements, big impact

Posted: 08 May 2021 - 04:44 AM
Hi Judith, thanks for the bump!
Posted: 05 May 2021 - 11:28 PM
Wow, I know this is from years ago, but I really found this thread encouraging. :)
Posted: 02 October 2019 - 06:15 AM
Don't be afraid to start over. This time you are not starting from scratch but from experience.
Posted: 19 July 2014 - 02:38 PM
Wonderful thread full of fantastic quotes. I hadn't before considered the link between hoarding and perfectionism, which I definitely suffer from! I'm currently de-hoarding my late parents house, and it's made me realise I'm a mild hoarder too. Rubbish is easy, straight into the bin/recycling. It's the remaining useful objects I have difficulty with. Plenty has already gone to charity, and now it's time to get the rest on Ebay. The issue is definitely perfectionism/control.. being afraid to start, or not knowing what to start with; 'What if I don't get the listings right? What if it doesn't sell? What if I regret getting rid of it? What if I get rid of that incomplete tea set then find the missing saucer!' I knew when it got to this stage maintaining motivation and battling 'the fear' would be hard. There is an easy answer; take EVERYTHING to charity. But I can certainly do with every spare penny right now to renovate the house, which in itself should be a huge motivator. I must remind myself how well we've done already, and sit through the ebb, knowing the flow will return.

The words that pop into my head right now are courtesy of Fight Club;

'Just Let Go'

'the things you own, end up owning you'

ps; The quote from Jody 'you are better than this' - made me cry! Thanks all.
Trust God and Clean House
Posted: 07 January 2014 - 07:22 AM

Really liked Mares last one too & others.

"Less is More"

Quote origins unknown

"I can do all things thru Christ who strengthens me." Phillipians 4:13
Posted: 01 August 2013 - 02:49 PM
I am glad you liked it. *Smiles*
Posted: 01 August 2013 - 02:33 PM
Mare, that is such an excellent quote.

It gave me a fresh perspective on living simply.

Posted: 01 August 2013 - 12:39 AM
"A simple life is not seeing how little we can get by with?that's poverty?but how efficiently we can put first things first. . . . When you're clear about your purpose and your priorities, you can painlessly discard whatever does not support these, whether it's clutter in your cabinets or commitments on your calendar. (148)"
― Victoria Moran, Lit From Within: Tending Your Soul For Lifelong Beauty
Posted: 24 July 2013 - 11:21 PM
Life is about balance
Energy is eternal.
Posted: 10 June 2013 - 12:48 AM
Just heard this on PRI & it applies to theme of tonight's support group! Great 60 second de-accumulation proposal put forth by Barbara Kingsolver (although I think it applies to any adult, not just over-50! ). Here's link to summary show info & audio

I found it motivating :)
Posted: 31 May 2013 - 10:35 AM
The best time to plant a tree is twenty years ago.
The second best time to plant a tree is today. :)
Posted: 31 May 2013 - 07:41 AM
Start Today. A year from now you'll be glad you did.

I forget where that quote comes from. Of course my ever argumentative, little mind says, "yeah only if you keep at it and don't slack off the next 364 days." >:D
Posted: 30 May 2013 - 10:25 PM
Motivation: Anyone who understands law of affection.

'Take charge of your thoughts on a daily basis will enrich and nourish you and make it so much easier for your wishes to come true'

THE WISH - Angela Donavan
Posted: 22 May 2013 - 12:22 PM
from my husband, regarding the mess
"you are better than this"
extremely powerful words
Posted: 27 March 2013 - 07:10 PM
Is what I am doing now getting me to my goal.
Posted: 02 September 2012 - 12:03 AM
Ooops, I forgot to post the motivational message!
The one that has been helping me stay focused and not giving up is

"you can and WILL succeed"

brought to you by the Sunday Online Support Group :D
(sorry I forgot who the person was who said this to me, but I have it printed out and taped to my computer monitor). When I get depressed or overwhelmed I come sit at my computer and it's now the very first thing I see. 9 out of 10 times I have read it and gotten immediately back on my feet and back to whatever daunting project was at hand.
Posted: 01 September 2012 - 11:50 PM
I can't help you with ideas about the systems to organize (I am still struggling with that myself). As to the dishes and laundry there are lots of different options, one being that you sit down with your husband and divide up the daily/ weekly chores.
This idea didn't work for me but does seem to work for others. The system I am currently using is as follows.
Dishes: what I have been doing (for about 2-3 weeks now and it's working out really really well) is I will wait until right before I go to sleep and make a walk through every room in the house and collect any and all dishes, then I will load up the dishwasher and run a load at night. I have to take the dog out before I go to sleep and her cage is right next to the kitchen so it's sort of on my way anyway. I am also a full time college student so it helps me to schedule the chores. Then, the next morning as I make breakfast for myself I will either put the dishes away, or leave them in the dishwasher for my husband to put away (he is home all day long). The good news is after a few weeks of actively trying it becomes a habit.

Laundry: I'm the only one who knows how to do the laundry but what I learned a few months ago was a big help. My husband and I now have separate hampers for our dirty clothes and I have a spot in the master bedroom designated for my husband's clean clothes (he picked it himself). It's really helpful because I don't have to sort through anything after the clothes come out of the dryer. If it's my husband's I just carry the load from the dryer to the designated area and dump it out. He will put them away when he feels like it and if he doesn't want to they are not in anyone's way (I'm the hoarder, he just doesn't like doing any chores until there is a lot to do all at once). I have yet to find the perfect day to do my laundry but I tend to base it on my class schedule. Last semester I did laundry every Tuesday. This semester I think washing the laundry on a Thursday night (to be dried Friday morning, put away Saturday) or washed Friday night to be dried either also on Friday night (or Saturday) and put away Saturday will be my schedule this semester.
The trick (in my case) is finding when I am most motivated (which is usually in the morning) AND finding time where I am least likely to be worried about/ stressed from school or a large homework load. If I have lots of homework due Wednesday and Thursday then I won't do laundry on Tuesday or Wednesday because I will be stressed about making time for homework, and won't feel happy about putting my clothes away.

Of course none of this may work for you at all, but the idea is to not let the stress from home hurt your school or the stress from school hurt your home. I knowing trial and error isn't fun, but I recommend trying as many different ideas/ systems until you find the one that is perfect for you.
Best of luck and congratulations on having cleaned up your hoard! (I'm at about 50% control with my hoard at the moment)
Posted: 16 August 2012 - 11:06 AM
Many a false step is made by standing still.
Matthew Seven
Posted: 30 March 2012 - 12:34 AM
Ask. You must ask for what you know you need and cannot do alone. Just ask.

Matthew 7:7 ASK
Posted: 01 February 2012 - 03:32 PM
I tell my pastor I am a hoarder in recovery. My home used to look like the Tv shows. Now it is a lot better,but I can't ever seem to finish organizing even a small area before I have somewhere I need to be. Then when I get back to it, I can't remember the system I was using that was giving me so much success. I want to be able to keep a home where friends and family would be able to drop by on short notice.
I am a full time college student graduating in July 2012 to own a daycare and my husband is a published author. Our last children left home last year and thankfully took most of their stuff with them. Papers,books, and daily tasks(dishes,laundry) are our downfall.Any ideas?
Posted: 14 January 2012 - 12:34 AM
What would help me is if the person I lived with said things like "I believe in you. I know you can do it." "Any progress is progress." "I'll be happy with whatever you can do today." And I could feel his belief in me and know that when I don't believe in myself and feel discouraged, his belief in me helps to motivate me. If he said, "I love you no matter what--no matter how cluttered things are." And I could feel that he could see the good in me behind the bad.
His seeing the good in me would make me want to make him proud. I would want to do anything to please him because he made me feel so good about myself--because he treated me with respect.
Also, what would help is if my stuff is treated with respect, handled with care---not stepped on, thrown, or called "sh**".

.....instead of calling me names, cussing (loudly, with forceful hostility), complaining, threatening and rageful tirades.
Posted: 13 January 2012 - 04:30 PM
Just start with whatever is in front of you, cindi . . . wherever your eyes rest. Or survey a room . . . what is easy to toss or donate? Toss it or put it in the donate pile. Or sometimes when I am not at home, I'll think about what part of the hoard I might tackle next . . . write a list . . . then start in when I get home.
Posted: 10 January 2012 - 04:33 PM
Since I postpone doing anything because I don't know where to start, I have to remind myself of the folowing quote which helps me get started. I don't know who said it, but it is so true.

'Perfectionism leads to procrastination which leads to paralysis.'
Posted: 26 March 2011 - 01:10 PM
The future depends on what we do in the present

-Mahatma Gandhi
Remember this as you are standing there at a store, garage sale, etc. about to acquire something and bring it home.
Posted: 24 March 2011 - 07:42 AM
I woke up early, early this morning to prepare for a scheduled donation pickup this am. Not even close to ready because of emergency that came up on Sunday and has been weighing us down since. #3 is going to save me today! Thanks, Cory
Cory Chalmers
Posted: 22 March 2011 - 09:50 PM
I have a few that I like to tell people, but you mentioned one of them in your last post :)

1) It just needs to be house functional, not house beautiful

2) Any progress is a success. If you are constantly moving in the right direction eventually it will be done.

3) (As you pick something up) Is this item more important to me than my family, my friends, my time, or my freedom?
On that same note....does this item bring me enough happiness to lose all of those things mentioned above?
Posted: 22 March 2011 - 09:03 AM
Hoarders tend to be perfectionists. Here is one of my favorites:

Progress, not perfection, is the goal.

Source: my hubby :)
Posted: 22 March 2011 - 09:00 AM
Sometimes we need just the right words to help us get started (or to keep going) when we are purging.

Please post your favorites here (please give credit to author at the end. If the link is long, you can make the font real little.
Hoarding Help Message Boards : Motivation Needed? : Small statements, big impact

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