I worked pretty much all day, from 8:45am to 4:30pm and then took my dog to visit a few friends. Now I am tired and wondering how I am ever going to get everything done. So many things on the list and still not done.

Dd will definitely not take the chickens. And her zoning only allows 4.

I am not unreasonably anxious about things coming back, I am unreasonably anxious about things I have given Buddy being given away. Or even really cool things other people gave him. Like, what if he doesn't have any special things for his babies?

I am no help on the wax, because I would give it all away. I don't want to add chemicals or particulate matter to my air. I do warm empty glass vanilla bottles and simmer cinnamon on the woodstove, but that's it. Amusingly in contrast, I do raku firing, which I'm sure exposes me to all kinds of nasty stuff. But only me, not my babies. I shower and wash my clothes as soon as I get home.

SubC, sounds like Dd needs to be given the extra chickens! Then she won't run out of eggs in winter, and you won't have to work so hard!

I have anxiety about kids' clothes coming back, too. I hate it. I saved a lot of clothes for my grandkids, and as they outgrow them, dil is giving them back in big bags. I just stare at them and leave them in a pile. But I think I will make a rule that anything that comes back, I have to get rid of at least half of it. That's a good start for me. Let me know how you end up handling it. Maybe we can both make some progress and inspire each other.

After the Chaos of Receipts, I have not done much else. I moved the wash to the dryer and put in another load of wash. I took some packing out to the trash. Opened the big box with the furnace filters in it (my goal is to change the filter... but UGH, one step at a time.)

At what point will I just get so sick of my room being in chaos that I just go ahead and toss everything and figure if I need it I will replace it someday?

Probably never, but the thought crosses my mind.

For example, a friend gave me one of those wax melt warmers a few years ago, with like 2 different scents of wax. It is kind of cute and nice and makes the house smell nice. Then I went and bought like 6 more scents. So I have all these packages of scents, plus the warmer, and I literally never use it. I used it less than 5 times in all these years. Yet I think, I will want it when I am in my new house. So it sits.

Maybe the compromise is to box it up and move it to the storage room for now, so I can clear my bedroom and stop staring at it gathering dust.

Lila, you are making a dent. Even if it feels like you can't see it.

I am feeling a little swamped after having the boys here. I sent Dd home with 8 dozen eggs to share as party favors at the "mom's only" birthday celebration she is hosting for herself tomorrow. My fridge was unmanageable.

I told her I needed to keep fewer chickens because I have too many eggs and it would make sense to have less work instead, and she said "don't do that! We will sell eggs for you! I don't want to run out in winter!" So I don't know how that is going to go..

She brought back clothes that are too small for Buddy and told me she will be bringing back toys that have been shared with Birdy, but anything bought new for Buddy is getting handed on to dsil's pregnant cousin. That is causing me a little bit of unreasonable anxiety.

I just read a thing that said July 2 is the exact midpoint of the calendar year. I didn't really do a summer solstice reflection this year. Maybe I will do some planning based on that.

still trying...

- gathered receipts from the floor, 3 side tables and the chair and sorted them, checked against my bank (was on a trip), submitted one "mistake" and got refunded, send a few emails etc, and threw the receipts out

- cooked the trout from the freezer with asparagus and frozen fries, ate late lunch

I am struggling to get things done. I just want to watch tv and rest. I do have one load in the washer... sitting there all afternoon. Will dry.

Thank you Tatoulia!

After I posted I went into my bedroom determined to do SOMETHING. In 30 minutes I:

- vacuumed up some dust bunnies (then my hand vac ran out of power, so it is charging. My stick vac died a couple weeks ago).

- stood there looking around talking to myself
- put some "random items" in a box into another box with "random items"
- put the newly empty box on my bed as a donation box and got my trash can set up next to it
- dusted off the lid of a rubbermaid tote I pulled from under my bed

- found a box that has been sitting in there for almost a YEAR with a bundle of fresh thyme drying inside it. So I took it to the kitchen, put it on a cookie sheet, and stripped off the dried thyme leaves. It took forever and I had to pick out all the tiny twigs. I had an empty glass jar in my room too, so I put the thyme in there and put it in the spice cabinet. WIN!

(however, was it worth having a box in my room for 10 months and spending 20 minutes getting the leaves into the jar, only to get about 2 tablespoons of thyme? No. I will not do this again. If someone gives me fresh herbs, I will use them, freeze them, or throw them out).

Now I am taking a break but will go back in. That did not make a dent and took half an hour.

I will always believe in you, Lila! You can do this!

I do have the small cooling gel pads for the cats! For some reason I thought thru were weight activated! Good to learn that my little one is feeling the effects.

Off to the gym! I gave my cleaners the week off due to the heat (I pay them anyway because it's in my budget already and it's not kind to affect their income that way). So I need to change my own bedding today.

Glad you are having time with your boys, SubC!

Today is my second day off and this time I am staying home.

I am conflicted about my bedroom. It is a disaster area, very dusty in places, I can't find anything, and there are clean clothes draped everywhere again. But when I go in there, I feel immediate overwhelm, even if I look at a small area I feel great anxiety and walk back out.

How can I get myself going on this? I NEED to find things. Even thinking about it stresses me out. Do you think I have to just push through and force myself or something??

Lila, I hope you had a good day off.

Today, finally, my energy level is back to normal. My boys are coming this afternoon.

I take generic iron tablets. - ferrous sulfate. I have to take them with food. They still bother my stomach, but only for about twenty minutes, and I can distract myself from it.

Hello friends, it's my day off finally.

Tatoulia, have you heard of gel cooling mats? I had one for my dog, you can get them online by searching gel cooling mat for dogs (they do make small ones) and they are self cooling and draw heat from their body. You do not have to plug it in or refrigerate it or anything. I mention because they are not weight activated. They really work well for dogs - a lot of my friends who travel with their dogs in summer have them. Just an idea for sweet grandma cat.

SubC, what kind of iron do you take? I too am very anemic and tired. Someone told me about a liquid called SOS tincture so I bought a bottle and am taking it to get my numbers up, but it is too expensive to take long term. I want to switch to pills when the bottle is gone.

I'm sorry you miss your kitty. That is the hardest thing about pets. I have found it very traumatic to lose my animals. When I was thinking about adopting my new doggie, I looked at her and thought, she is going to die. Even if she lasts 10 or 12 years, she is going to die. Can I really handle falling in love with someone else who will die and leave me breathless with grief? Obviously the answer is yes, it is worth it. I guess after losing so many humans in my life, all parents, grandparents, closest friends etc, I am grief- exhausted, but it is what it is. We love them and that is the price. Sorry I ended up saying more about me than about your loss. I hope though, that you can feel you are not alone.

I am still drowning in lettuce and spinach and eggs, so will probably try making a quiche, good idea Tatoulia. I might just cook down all the spinach with some garlic and freeze it to eat later.

So far today I:
-fed and walked the dog
- cleaned up the dog yard and took the poo to the trash on the curb
- Took a few boxes to the curb
- put a few fallen branches in the green bin on the curb
- emptied the bathroom trash, put in a new bag, and took it to the curb
- washed a few dishes by hand
- melted some crystallized honey in hot water and poured it into the other jar of honey
- went to make coffee and saw I had forgotten to clean it out last week, left grounds in there that were moldy. So I washed it and ran vinegar through it, then water, then made coffee
- read outside
- took some frozen roll dough out and put it in a pan in a 200 oven to rise for later
- took out a frozen trout to thaw for my dinner, and a frozen salmon filet for tomorrow
- took out a bag of frozen plums from last summer to make plum bread tomorrow

Gee I am on a roll. I plan to make some egg salad today to eat with asparagus. I love the combo of eggs and asparagus!

Will continue to do things and update.

Good morning!

CM, I am becoming concerned about you. It has been nearly three weeks since you posted here. Is everything alright?

I felt somewhat awful yesterday and wasn't able to do much. I finally realized that I had missed taking my vitamins a couple of days on vacation and then five days in a row when we came home. My vitamins include massive amounts of iron to treat persistent anemia, and I think my hemoglobin levels had dropped to the point where there wasn't enough oxygen getting to my muscles and brain. I took them yesterday and 24 hours later am already feeling a bit better. Taking another dose now.

I suppose the heat didn't help, but the heat index is only a degree cooler today, and it has been hot for so long that the concrete porch floor feels warm on my feet this morning.

My almonds arrived yesterday, and I did manage to put them into airtight containers, wash the big plastic bag they came in for pottery covering, and set the cardboard box in the recycle area to collect single stream. I also cleaned the sticker residue off of some used books that had been waiting weeks for that chore and shelved them, and made custard mix. So the day wasn't a total loss.

I didn't get any pottery done though, so now I'll have to fire the bisque load myself if I want anything for Monday.

My new sheets are supposed to arrive today, so I might start cleaning out the closets. We'll see..

Hi SubC! Thanks for asking after the cats. I know you miss your little friend.

Mom's cat has been doing okay in the heat, mainly under the bed with a tiny foot peeking out. My old grandma cat has looked okay, but I worry about her soI wiped her down with some cat wipes yesterday. She didn't want the cooling pad and I wonder if she even weighs enough to activate it. Usually only mom's cat likes the friskies little soups but I also gave them to my cat. Trying to keep everyone hydrated. My cat drinks a lot of water because she's in kidney failure. Sorry these sentences are disjointed.

Much more livable weather tonight. I have the windows open and the ceiling fans on. My little old cat is snuggled up against me. She is the dearest thing. I wish that the people who had her for 16 years were aware that she is very well loved and cared for. I did write to the shelter after I adopted her and asked them to tell the family that she's home, relaxed, and happy.

What a relief to have the windows open. It's been a miserable few days.

Everyone, take care of yourselves.

Good morning!

Tatoulia, how are the cats? I miss Mr. Kitty. He would be lying on the cool basement floor in this weather.

I understood what you were saying about the shopping. I will only add an extra item to get free shipping if the extra item is less than the shipping. For example - the book shipping is almost $9. So I even if I had no books left on my list, I would add a random kids book to my order that cost less than that if it put me over free shipping - I can always leave it in a little free library if it is disappointing.

Vacation has seemed to give me a bad case of the wants. We took our own pillows on vacation, and when I put mine on my mother's lovely guest bed, I realized how faded and worn my pillow case looked. The brand she had on the bed is having a summer sale, and I bought 4! Sets of sheets. (For my bed and the guest beds) I now need to clean out my linens - the pillowcase was from my "nice" set. Now the company has sent me a discount on my next order - including sale items, and they also have towels on sale. Do I NEED new towels? - no. Would it be nice to have new towels? - yes. When did I last buy towels? I don't know. But I know it was two on sale to get free shipping on sheets.

The jar cover place has also sent me another discount. - do I or don't I...

I think part of it is that I am trapped in the house in this heat, and my brain is screaming at me that these are the long days of abundance when everything must be gathered and tucked away for the scarcity of winter. I went to the grocery store yesterday and bought - sugar (to make ice cream), soy sauce (for greens), Mayo and rye bread (for egg salad sandwiches), cherries (because they were gorgeous and on sale), and diet soda (because it is hot and I am addicted to caffeine). That is my grocery shopping for the week. (Plus my bulk order of almonds) I have plenty of flour, rice, lentils, and beans.

Today I need to work in the pottery studio - I start a new firing class next week.

Thanks for the clarification SubC! Was trying to protect you from overbuying! You have a good plan and I love the fantastic bookshelf for your grandson! Wowie!

Too hot to try to get outside today. It is miserable. I gave my elderly cat a quick wipe with cat safe aloe wipes. Trying to keep her cool. She won't sleep in her cooling pad so I'll hide it under her towel. I'm not sure she weighs enough to activate it but we shall see. Other cat is doing okay.

I was hoping to be able to open the windows in the AM and cool down my place but it looks like we have one more day to go. I'll be in office tmr but I'm not going to stay my usual lateness because I'll want to get home to the cats. I generally stay until at least seven.

The cleaning lady for my neighbors was around today so I dropped off my usual waters plus I had two pair of jeans I had planned to donate and I know she takes clothes to her church so she took them. She also took my neighbor's mail into his apartment. I had nearly a month's worth of his mail here.

This weekend I must get to the cat shelter with donations as well as the textile recycling. Every single bit helps.

Good morning!

Tatoulia, I did not explain that properly.

I have a wish list of books on that site (mostly kids books I have gotten from the library with Bean and would love to read over and over with every grandchild, or copies of much loved books I want to give Birdy because he is not here often - his mother also loves books and reads to him every day. The basement renovation they are doing is going to include 60ft of bookshelf for Birdy). I STOPPED when I got to free shipping and had used my bonus points. But I let myself order now because the bonus points would expire. My next order from them will probably be in August unless an out of print book I have been searching for comes up, or they have a new amazing deal, because in august my free book reward expires, and the next time I order I will get a new free book reward, which will then expire eventually, so I want to delay that to discourage myself from buying all the books.

Also, I would like four more of those jar covers, (4 pints each of the five flavors I make to get me through 5 months when the goats are dry - 1 pint of ice cream per week) but they did not offer me one more discounted set. Originally I was going to start with 8 because I STOPPED at free shipping. They have arrived already, and my assessment is: easy to put on, hard to take off, which should mean they will stay on in the freezer, and heavy enough to protect the jars.

I am still feeling guilty about not crafting covers from materials I already have. But maybe this is a "trading money for time" situation. I have been storing my ice cream in Ball plastic freezer containers, which break when they are dropped or fall in the freezer, and the lids have been starting to develop cracks over time with multiple uses. Also the shape is less efficient for filling the freezer. Because the broken ones are recycling, I have not been counting them as objects out.

If this was somebody else posting, I would say - ok, get rid of the yarn and sixteen plastic freezer containers. I am thinking about it. I can't do it yet. Especially the yarn. I think I will knit something else. Or do crafts with Bean.

Anyway, I am glad your house is providing you with a sanctuary from the heat!

I slept late, so I need to go do my outside work before it gets hotter!

Lila, I'm not the cook in the family so no ideas on all the food. I guess if I had extra eggs I'd make some quiches. Quiches are a perfect breakfast, lunch, and dinner item as far as I am concerned.

SubC, what I am about to say may seem blasphemous. I pay for shipping. I don't want the extra stuff that I'd have to buy to get free shipping. For me, it feeds into this idea that we need more, more. So if I have something I want to buy on line, I buy it and I pay the shipping. Multiples were one of the things I struggled with back when I was buying and hoarding. So if I see something I want to buy and it's on sale, I buy it, pay the shipping, and call it a day. Would you give that some thought for the future? Again, it's blasphemy but I'd rather spend the 8 dollars on shipping vs having to bring my total to 150 or some such. It's been absolutely freeing for me.

I don't know if you were here before I cleared out my house, SubC, but I used to hate it Sun the heat and humidity. We are in the midst of terribly hot weather here and as uncomfortable as it is,at least my house isn't dirty. So that's been a big benefit for me. The power of being on this forum.

I did manage to get a 2 mile walk in tonight. I went by a fountain that is designed for people to play in all the kids were out even though it was nearly 9. I walked around it and definitely cooled off from the mist. The kids were having a blast!

I gave my cleaners the week off. I still pay them but I cannot see having them come in during this heat. It is just too hot.

Okay dear friends. I'll ttyl.

Good afternoon.

I have a confession to make.

I have been shopping.

And ordering. There are too many deals and specials on things I want.

I ordered seven children's books because with my bonus points that expire tomorrow they were less than $20 including tax, shipped to my house. (All are used in "very good" condition, some are hardcover.) I like that they are used and come in the mail, I hate that they will arrive in some random number of plastic mailing envelopes (even if the envelopes are "recyclable"- they actually get "down cycled" not made into new envelopes.)

I also ordered silicone jar covers so I can freeze things in mason jars and not worry about them breaking in the chest freezer if the jar falls onto another jar. I should just crochet/knit covers - I have yarn, but I am still struggling with crochet. I ordered 8 - two discounted packages of 4, which gave me the minimum for free shipping after my 15% first time buyer discount, and then they offered to let me order two more at 20% off shipped in the same package. So I did. - 16 pints of ice cream.

I did not order a silicone baking sheet, a dried hot pepper grinder, or shoes. I do actually "need" shoes, I borrowed dressy white sandals from my mom for my in-laws' anniversary party, but I didn't find exactly what I want.

I also did a bulk order of roasted almonds. I tried buying my roasted almonds at the grocery store for a little less, but they taste like oil and made me eat too many (like potato chips) and were contributing to my weight gain. Also they were coming in one plastic package for every 1-2 lbs. These come in a big, lightweight, plastic bag that is useful in the pottery studio and a cardboard box. The nut place then sent me a coupon that will make walnuts cheaper than at the store, and again less packaging. However, since I have to buy (and store) a six month supply, I am planning to use that in July right before it expires.

Meanwhile I am also filling my house with berries, eggs, milk, and lettuce. Beets soon. The inner squirrel is running wild.

Welcome home, SubC!

Hi Tatoulia!! So good to hear from you. I am glad you are happy and chipping away!

Does anyone have suggestions on what to do with large amounts of:
salad greens (young red and green lettuce) - bags full
spinach, fresh and young - bags full
fresh apricots, big ones, a whole box full
eggs - 4-5 dozen

I am tired of just salad, the lettuce is a bit bitter when cooked (I tried sautéing it), there are more apricots than we could eat and more eggs than I can eat soon (TotsFam already had bought a couple dozen for themselves so they won't use much of these). I still have apricot jam from last year.

Suggestions welcome!

I have done nothing today but read. I have lots to do and will come back and report later.

Hello everyone! Lila, you are doing GREAT! I'm sorry you lost your friend. SubC, your vacation sounds wonderful. The cool ocean.

I've not been around lately and I don't know why. I'm continuing to chip away on my end. Making good progress. Have some things to take to the cat shelter and also to the textile recycling bin. I do have some things for goodwill. Maybe I'll take the bus over to the smaller goodwill tomorrow.

I was part of the JPMorgan Corporate Challenge Wednesday night. My company had a good team. I walked it. It was very good but insanely humid. I developed a sore throat and swollen glands that evening so cancelled my plans for Thursday and just slept all day. Yesterday (I took it off), I went to the museum to see an exhibit that was slated to leave this weekend. Very nice time. I then extended my walk home. Today I need to run some errands and go to the YMCA.

I've been working on eliminating things and I'm just so happy. I'm hoping to get a bag together for goodwill tonight so that I can justify going there tomorrow.

Good evening!

Lila, I am sorry about your friend.

Dh and I are home safe and sound and have heard from most of our kids and parents. (Bean's family is on the road this evening) the animals are doing great and as usual, the farm sitter left everything nicer than I did. I do not deserve her.

The garden isn't too bad. I think I can get back on top of the weeds and there are beets and greens ready to harvest, but not much gone by.

I want to wish everyone a happy solstice! I can't believe the year is half over (in a couple of hours when it will be dark and I plan to be asleep.)

Full accounting of acquisitions tomorrow after I unpack and start laundry. Too tired tonight!

The beach sounds so fun and the hummingbirds so peaceful! I'm glad you are enjoying your time there. The last time I did a trip like that with TotsFam was when there was only Tot! Three kids later and it may be another year or two before we go again. A newborn is happening in the fall.

I have been working my butt off. I was given two new projects, one of which is last minute and must be done pronto but involves building a team, scheduling, training the team, creating ads, making announcements, etc etc. I think it will be a good thing but it is definitely a surprise - we suddenly had people willing to volunteer so now it is my job to make it happen. I am also being considered for more hours so they will present that to the powers that be next week, and we will see what they say. I expect it to be a vote of yes, but am slightly nervous that someone will object. Trusting God to provide what I need.

Of course no decluttering or anything has happened since I got these projects on Wednesday. But I do plan to finish putting the master bathroom back together and finish cleaning it today. That may be the only thing I have time for. Although I will walk the dog if my son does not.

I did finish loading the dishwasher and it is running, have my basket of laundry ready to put in, cleaned up the dog yard and took the bag to the garbage.

Now I will do a bit of work work, then I need to get ready for a funeral of a friend of mine who passed from cancer. Have to stop by my work after that to do a few tasks and pick something up a friend left for me, and then MAYBE go visit someone before coming home and working some more.

Good morning!

My dd2 flew back to Colorado last night. My parents' house is so much chaos with Bean, Birdy, and buddy and everyone coming and going!

Spent the last two days at the beach. Walked in the mornings and swam in the ocean and played with the boys in the sand. Also took them to the boardwalk and Bean and Birdy rode some rides. They loved it!

Today Bean's family is going back to the beach and we are going to the zoo with Birdy.

For now I am the only one up and I am making coffee and watching the hummingbirds at my mom's feeder.

Aww, thank you SubC for taking the time to read and answer while you are on vacation! It means a lot that you did that! I hope you are having a wonderful time.

I keep doing SO much, all the little things, and feeling I'm not making progress, but I come here to post what I have done to make me SEE I am doing things. I mean, my list of to do's is not much shorter, but, I am doing things that need to be done.

The master bathroom is still not finished. I can see where it will take me a bit to get each item wiped off and put in a place, wipe cabinets, clean the toilet, mop, etc. But I am chipping away.

Today I:
- got up early and read
- took my dog for a walk around the neighborhood
- washed the dog and conditioned her fur in the backyard with a hose (what a workout!) She is itchy so I used medicated shampoo.
- found and wiped off the things I needed in the bathroom to get ready for the day
- put the plastic curtain back up in the tub
- took a shower
- got ready for work
- took care of a few things online
- went to work for a couple hours and came home
- finished a project, call, and email at home (15 min)

Now I am making homemade mac and cheese to have with the salad greens I was given. After I eat and relax a bit, I will be working at least another hour from home.

Thanks for reading! Now I feel better, like I did have a productive day.

Lila, I have been reading all of your threads and I am really proud of your progress. I don't have much time to post though - we spent two days with my in-laws and the party went well. Now we are back at my parents' house relaxing. Dsil is out wandering in the woods and both moms, both babies, and my dad are taking naps while everyone else plays games.

omg. I feel like I ran a marathon and the bathroom is not even done yet!!! This is why, like I said in my last post, I was putting it off. SO many steps!!

I spent 15 minutes putting all the stuff in there in a box and a bag and moving it out of the bathroom. Then another 10 sorting under the cabinets. The net result was 20 items out!

Then wiped down inside the cabinet and put a few things away. The box and bag are still full.

Then got IN the dry tub with the tool you stick down the drain to pull hair or gunk out. I have been careful not to put my hair down the drain, but it was slow, and omg the gunk that came out. Horrible! I don't even know how it got that bad. Time, I guess. So I got it all out.

Then it smelled bad in the drains so I put baking soda and vinegar down them and waited 15 minutes, rinsed with hot.

THEN I had to clean the stupid air jet tub. I never use it for baths. It was ex's idea. But I shower in there so the jets still have to be cleaned. Put hot water in with dishwasher tabs, ran jets 20 min, drained, rinsed.

THEN sprayed the tub and tile with scrubbing bubbles, waited 15 min, then scrubbed a bit and rinsed.

THEN refilled the tub a few inches of hot (because it has been a long time), and some Dawn and vinegar and it is bubbling now. I will drain, rinse, scrub again, then run the jets with clean cold water. I hate this tub!

So I did ALL of that and scrubbed inside the sink.

I still need to scrub the vanity, clean the toilet, put the plastic curtain back up, wipe down the outside of the tub, wipe the cabinets, sweep and mop the floor, sort all the stuff in the box and bag and things I put on my bed, wipe all the dusty things down, find places for everything or get rid of them. Oh and clean the mirror.

Man I hate this, I can't remember the last time I did a deep clean like this. I always wipe down and disinfect the toilet because that is just necessary to my sanity, but everything else had a layer of dust and/or soap scum on it.

Oh and the lights over the vanity are covered in dust. I need to get a stepstool and wipe them down too. Argh! Please give accolades!!

Sometimes it really is like bailing a boat with a spoon! I feel that way a lot.

Yesterday I got so many little tiny things done, a lot that I have been putting off for weeks or months. For example, I changed the water filters in my pitcher and the faucet. I made an appointment for my next dental cleaning. I wrote up a work schedule that people have been waiting for me to write. I found the vitamin B12. I got out the ant bait and set it up. I bought some law balm online for my dog.

It feels like nothing got done since they are a lot of little things, but it feels got to check off so many boxes and get those things out of my head.

Today I am having a lunch meeting. I did some reading. I also loaded the dishwasher which is running and hand washed the dog bowl holder.

My main goals for today are
- walk the dog at some point, even a short walk
- clean that darned master bathroom

I looked around at the bathroom this morning thinking, why am I putting this off for so long? And it is because there are sooo many small tasks involved. Sort pills. Sort cabinets and drawers to make room for things on the vanity. Decide if any of it can go. Wash the things that are dusty. Maybe fill my pill holder, or decide it is not a helpful tool and donate it. Take down the plastic curtain and replace it. Move all the shampoos and stuff so I can clean the tub. Use a tool to clean hair of out the drains.

Only then can I actually start cleaning the bathroom! omg.

I decided it would take me about one hour to do this. So I am committing to going in there and setting a timer for one hour and not stopping til the hour is up. Even if it does not get finished, it will end up being a much easier task.

Good morning!

We have been visiting with my parents and having a lovely time with too much food. I helped mom clean out a drawer. - bit like bailing a boat with a spoon.

I have been gifted two items so far. More detailed information later.

We are going to my in-laws' today bean and birdy's families arrived there last night. Dd2 hopefully arrives today. Her flights have been a logistical disaster.

Getting inspired is the hard part, SubC, at least for me! But I keep on trying.

Today so far I
- pulled weeds
- cut back a rose plant
- watered the raspberries
- picked up some stuff in the yard
- brought the dog out with me as I did this, which took longer than doing the actual work, lol (finding a collar, finding a long line, getting her to be calm to be leashed, getting her out and tying the long line...
- unloaded part of the dishwasher (it is now Tot's job, but I took out the things I wanted put away in my room)
- put in a load of wash

I also shopped online a bit for dog food and texted a lady who invited me to lunch.

I really MUST get my master bathroom cleaned up. There is stuff all over the vanity! There is just so much to do, and now my hours at work increased which is good but I have not been using my time wisely.

Good morning!

Grandchildren are more important than housework or decluttering!

Today is another garden/farm day. With laundry and packing thrown on top.

I'm thinking about my trip from the accumulating perspective - I know my mil has at least one small item tucked in a drawer for me, and there is a good chance I will end up bringing things home from my mom. Most of these are "upstream" items though - things that I will have to deal with eventually (and "eventually" is starting to feel far too soon!)

When we get home I definitely need to dig into the house again. I have a lot of projects on pause. Hopefully I will also be inspired to do it. Usually after spending time in my mil and mother's homes, mine feels a lot more manageable. Theirs are clean and orderly, but far more full. And much bigger.

Ok, I've been lazy long enough this morning!

You are getting lots done SubC.

I managed to clean out the veg drawer and make a salad. Then I got work related calls and had to do some of that stuff. Washed the dog's blanket. Cleaned out the toaster oven. But have not gotten to my master bathroom yet. The grandkids keep coming up and it is harder to stay focused and get things done. But it was nice spending time with them.

I have to work tomorrow morning and I have really got to get more organized and less lazy.

It was a very good day Lila, thanks.

When the kids picked up their kids - lol! They brought me an idea shelf they were getting rid of to make room for DD's new shelves. (They offered me several other pieces of furniture as well, including a pressboard bookshelf, but those went to st Vincent's.)

I have removed the falling off the wall, coated with years of sticky candle and cigarette grime from the previous home owner that never came all the way off, metal wire shelf that was in Bean's here-room closet (the bar was previously removed) and I have put the ikea shelf in the closet. It is going to be so much better for holding toys and games, plus most of the shelves are in his reach.

I had to stop myself from doing a deep dive into the whole closet and room because none of that has to be done before our trip. I am trying to make good choices on using my time.

I froze the custard. I also froze the rest of the cake Bean and I made yesterday, because Dh has half a key lime pie in the fridge.

I did some work in the garden and the dishwasher is running. I picked greens from the garden and ate them.

There are only nine things I "have to" do before we go, but all of them have multiple parts.

I'm working on them.

I hope your full day went well yesterday, SubC!

It is hot here. I worked yesterday and have some work to do from home today. So far today I did a few things that have been nagging at me:

Took out the bathroom trash which had diapers in it but no one else took it out
Pulled some weeds along the front sidewalk
Found the branch clippers and trimmed off the random small branches that were coming off my younger maple tree
Cut my nails (sheesh, that I have to make time for this!)
Washed my new dog, again, but this time with medicated anti-itch shampoo. This was no easy task so I am recovering now.

I want to get her nails trimmed as well. I was able to do 5 nails on her back feet last night as she was laying with me on the couch with her back feet near me. After 5 clips, she was done with it and left. I will try and do another few today. She is not really a fan.

I took out some frozen pasta sauce with "meat"balls (plant based) and it is thawing in the fridge for either tonight or tomorrow.

I am going to wash the dog's blanket, and hopefully clean my master bathroom today.

What are you all up to?

It is good - it's what I mean when I say "ice cream" the ice cream I make is technically frozen custard because it has eggs and is cooked.

I tried making the chocolate with less sugar and cream today. We'll see how it turns out.

Today more left the house than came in.
I kept up with laundry and dishes.
I cleaned up after myself.

I did not use/consume as many eggs or as much milk as I collected, and I am getting further and further behind there (also on the garden and barn as the weeds and poop continue daily)

But it is something.

Tomorrow I have the boys. When we were at the thrift store, Dd found some shelves she wanted. We bought them, but dsil has to pick them up tomorrow. He is going to bring the boys here and borrow our truck. Then he is going to go get the shelves and take them home. Dd is going home from work, help him unload the shelves, and then come here in our truck to get her boys in t8me to take them home and put them to bed. She may be bringing me the shelves that are being replaced at her house. It will be a full day.

ohhh custard, that sounds good. I have a lot of frozen fruit from last summer. I know I can blend it up to make a smoothie or blend with bananas to make a fake ice cream that is healthier. I need to use it up - new fruit is ready at the farmer's market!

I am trying to use what I have in the freezer, which is a lot, before buying more stuff. I might have to buy a few things here or there, but I really do not need to buy convenience foods.

I put in a load of towels and am spending time with my doggie. I have ants that suddenly appeared in my master bathroom out of the blue. I don't have any food in there. I sprayed them with lysol because that is what I had on hand and now I need to get in there and clean up the vanity, which has become counter of doom #2!

I feel so lazy all the time and have no energy. Today I was thinking about how a couple years ago my thyroid doctor prescribed me phentermine for weight loss. (Not fen phen which was dangerous). She said it was one of the oldest, most effective and least side effects medicines for it. I was on it for like a year and lost a lot of weight, and then stayed on a half dose for maintenance, because for me, it acted like an anti-depressant. I felt "normal" on it. I never felt hyper or extra-energetic, I just felt normal and more happy and able to get normal amount of things done. Now as I was remembering that I think I will try to go back on it again. My dr is no longer there, as she retired, but my primary wrote me a script a few months ago and I pretty much forgot about it. It is in my cabinet so I am going to start it tomorrow at a half dose and see if it helps me feel more normal again.

Good morning!

Hi CM!

I like big dogs. :)

Lila, I'm sorry about your mom. Things like that are part of the reason I have a problem with organized religion. So many religions in the world claim that their basic foundation is love, and every single one makes people do things that are not loving.

It sounds like you did a great job on your kitchen.

Yesterday I kind of sogged - just puttered around and didn't really get dug in to anything. I think I needed the rest.

Dh was awesome and actually cleaned some things. That has helped me be more inspired to keep up and accomplish something today. (Chatting with all of you helps me remember how lucky I am to have him. I know CM's roommate helps with household things, and also the adults at Lila's house, but when they are mentioned, I think that it is nice that they are helping, and I tend to take Dh for granted.)

So far I have done basic chores, started two loads of laundry (one is in the dryer) put away my winter chore coat, unloaded the dishwasher and loaded in all the remaining dirty dishes from yesterday plus breakfast.

I'm going to do a little more tidying and then prepare some custard to freeze later.

I'll check back.

Lila, I had pictured you with a small to medium dog this time but I'm not sure why. That sounds similar to my roommate's dog but hers is a mix of husky and shepherd.

Bunny boy has had his ups and downs but is hanging in there. He had some tummy issues but seems to be working through them. I take nothing for granted. And of course give him lots of love and sweet talk. His lady bunny is very close and attuned to him. Being with her relaxes him.

We have been having more rain these last few weeks and especially this past week. On Tuesday I was out in it, and got pretty wet. Some places in town and other parts of the state got various amounts of flooding. Our reservoir has been down 8 feet for a long time and these rains have brought it up some. But there will still be watering restrictions. Right now though we don't need to water.

I'm getting sleepy so I'm going to bring this to an arbitrary close now but I'll post more later.

hi CM! So good to "see" you! I am so sorry about your bunny. I hope he has a comfortable time left. You have obviously cared for him well.

SubC, I loved playmobile sets as a child! Just thinking about it makes me want to play with them! I have a few, very few, pieces left from my childhood (my mother got rid of EVERYTHING of mine when I was 18 out of spite because I left her church, including most of my special things, books, my violin, and my dog. It hurt so much. That is probably where part of my reluctance to let things go comes from.) Anyway I have a couple horses and people and a few little things, not even enough to fill a child's shoebox, but they remind me of how much fun I had with my sets as a child. Thanks for the happy memory!

I am enjoying my dog. She is almost 70 pounds they said, and is a German Shepherd mix (looks like one though). She is so sweet! She is soft and black and lovely. She loves the kids and everyone she meets. She is so thankful that I rescued her from that awful kennel, that she follows me around all day wagging her tail. She doesn't know anything but sit, but I am teaching her. She is perfectly housebroken and loves to sleep in her fluffy dog bed in my room all night. I have never let a large dog sleep in my room, but she is so quiet and stays in her bed and is so happy there. I love her. She is about 2 years old.

Today I wanted to order junk food and stuff. But instead, I dragged out every item from 4 shelves in my kitchen cabinets. I have these very weird, super deep cabinets (so deep I cannot reach the back of them even with a pair of tongs!) and things get shoved in there. It is a small kitchen with few cabinets and no pantry so it gets hard to find anything and I forget what I have. So my youngest son helped me reach everything with a long spatula and his longer arms, we wiped out each shelf, I threw away some junk and expired stuff and gave a few things to dil. I have put food away on 2 of the shelves. The other 2 are waiting for me to sort and refill. The food etc is all over the counters and stove.

I did open 2 cans of food and have them for dinner: black eyes peas, and cabbage. I had them with a small square of cornbread from the freezer. I did not order or buy anything. And now that I see and know what is in there, I can use it up.

There are no cookies or cakes or chips. There is a bag of "real fruit" gummy bears but I can only eat 2 or 3 at once since they are very sweet, so they are my sweet treat plus the kids eat them. There are a few kinds of crackers. There are lots of nuts and seeds, beans, lentils, sauces, seasonings, coffee, pasta. And a lot of cans of vegetarian soups and flavored beans.

I am pleased that I got the cabinets almost done, and I will put the rest away before I got to bed.

Good morning.

The house is a mess from the boys yesterday. I had them for ten hours and we baked and they had a play in the tub bath. Dd picked them up and stayed for dinner.

And I am awash in eggs and milk.

Lila, I am sorry about teen. But congratulations on your new family member! I too want to hear more. Breed/description, age, color, size, adorable traits...

Yes, I have parents. I am very lucky. I have both original parents who stayed married and are still living on their own. I wish I could see them more often, but I moved far away, and they don't travel far anymore.

I do talk to mom on the phone and FaceTime a lot, dad more rarely, he doesn't really "chat". Dad has slowed down a lot in the last year, which is hard to see, but his health has been bad for so long, he is actually doing really well. Mom takes good care of him.

CM, yay for clearing things out! Enjoy your toad. And your time with boy bunny. No matter how long they stay or how much they exceed expectations, and even though we know going in we will outlive them, the end is hard.

I did not do very much to get ready for the recycling drop, but I have some time this morning. Honestly, it is probably not the best use of my time, but right now I just need to feel like things are leaving my house. Even though recycling is basically maintenance.

Dd and I have a thrift store date tomorrow afternoon, so I am going to get a box ready to take for that as well, and think about what I am looking for.

We have two very large, missing pieces Playmobil pirate ships in the basement that we got in a yard sale bin when ds was small. I wanted to get rid of them, but ds asked me to save them (he has taken most of his stuff from my house, Bean is actively using most of what is left) yesterday ddil went to a yard sale and found a good, complete pirate ship for only $5.50! Now ds says I can donate the ones in the basement! Hurray!

Bean and I put three eggs under his little hen yesterday. He is excited for them to hatch. It violates my "not adding" rule, but Bean will never be almost 5 again, and he is excited about it now.

Ok, so I should do some stuff and not just post about it. Have a goid Saturday! Check back later!

Hi Lila, and SubC and Tatoulia and anybody else. I'm kind of caught up in a lot. Sounds like pets are a common theme here. SubC, my condolences on Mr Kitty. You made his last days comfortable and not lonely.

My boy bunny, we don't know how much longer he has. What at first seemed to be an infection on his foot is now more looking to be a tumor and it is increasing in size. He is 12 years 9 months old which for a bunny especially of his breed is like Methuselah in the Bible. It's hard for me to wrap my mind around. He has medicine for comfort care.

Lila, I know you were really wanting a new dog so that should give you something happy to be occupied with and help take your mind off the sad things at least somewhat. What kind of dog is she?

I have one new pet, a toad. Found her under the wheel of my vehicle unharmed and I had been wishing I had a toad again.

I have gotten a few things to the thrift store, some books, that tool box, and miscellaneous. Couple of cubic feet worth.

Today when I went to the reptile store looking at toad stuff it is right by the Guitar Center and I dropped off an old Midi cable I wasn't using that they might know someone who can use. Got that out of my vehicle as well. I know I shouldn't do that for most things, carry it around so long, but it was a specialty item. Well, I should've dropped it off a lot sooner anyway, haha.

Hopefully I don't have odd items like that again. I think I've gotten rid of most by now. For example, I had a doodad for repairing old wall telephone cords and that just went to the thrift store because it's not that specialized a thing. Most of my old tech is gone, I believe. Unless I find a forgotten stash. Hope not. Bnb

SubC, I am so sorry about Mr. Kitty. It is so hard losing our furry friends. You did everything you could. Take whatever time you need.

Also, good job in working on the stuff and putting things on the floor to sort! DH is not the one working on it so you know best what method works. Any progress towards your goals is good! It's like when we open a box to sort and the stuff goes everywhere at first. Eventually it gets sorted and there is less stuff. It can just be messy in the process.

I like the idea of you going in the ocean! And funny, when I read that part I was like, you have parents?!? lol... I mean, we all have parents but I was thinking How cool that you still have parents to visit! That makes me happy for you. I think you have mentioned them before, but it hit me differently today.

Hi Tatoulia! I hope you are well.

I had a rough week, crying a lot and starting to feel like I don't want to be here. I mean, I don't want to DIE, I just want a different life or something. This week was 3 months since I lost my last doggie. It has been so awful, and Teen made a terrible choice and ended up with her dad calling 911 and the ambulance taking her to the ER. She is okay now but not really, if you know what I mean. It is sad.

Well then a couple days ago I took the last foster back and was walking dogs and came home and cried and cried, and then went back and after volunteering all day, decided to adopt her. So my new princess is in the house, living a spoiled life after roaming the streets for who knows how long and being in the stray shelter for weeks. I washed her twice she was so filthy. Now she is soft and clean and shiny and fluffy! It has given me a good deal of relief from my pain.

However I have not been cleaning or decluttering, but need to get started on that.

SubC, I would love to cheer each other on in the Decluttering your waistline thread! I will weigh myself in the morning and start posting daily (that will be my goal).

Thank you all for the friendship and support. I miss hearing more from CM, and also wonder about Road, and the other people who came and posted once or twice and never came back. I hope they will think of us and come give an update!

Thanks Tatoulia.

A friend already offered me a new cat. I think we will be catless for a while. It will be strange because I have only been catless for short periods of time in my life. And not since dd2 was a baby.

I miss him the morning. He sat with me while I drank my coffee.

There is a community recycling drop on Saturday not too far from here. They don't take everything, but they take almost all of the plastic. So if I work on the heap in my basement today, I can reduce that on Saturday.

Today is my first summer vacation day with no evaluations and no boys. But I gave class tonight and the boys tomorrow.

God bless Mr Kitty. You gave him a beautiful home.

This morning I did four evaluations and spent time with Mr Kitty. He left us quietly just before noon - two raspy sighs. I was petting him.

I'm just going to try to finish the last seven evaluations. That's it for goals today.

Good morning!
Quiet here.
I slept in a bit this morning - got up just in time to make Dh breakfast. I'm still tired.

I snuck in a few minutes to do an evaluation yesterday, so I have 11 today and then I'm done. I'm already feeling overwhelmed by the idea of getting ready for our trip in 9 days.

I want very much to see my parents and my kids and my other grandson, and I want to go in the ocean (I miss the ocean! - I grew up there) but I don't want to leave my house. The older I get, the harder it becomes.

Two more books arrived yesterday. One is going to Birdy in July, so I won't count it, and I just realized that one I already counted in is also going, so no additions to that thread.

If I accomplish anything today, I'll let you know.

Good morning!

Boys today. Only did one evaluation yesterday.. 12 to go by tomorrow night because I won't really have time before 5 on Wednesday. - I'll have just Bean for the day.

Good morning again!

Lila, I'm sorry you are still so sad. That was a win on the coffee shop!

Yesterday, not sure where to start. I didn't quite meet my evaluation goal, so I have seven to do today, which is not bad.

I did plant out the last variety of tomatoes. I went to the feed store and the fair - where I encountered a potter friend who said she might know someone who will foster Mr. Kitty while we are on vacation. I'm supposed to call her later today. I saw some beautiful art and a lot of plastic. Jam and honey, but I'm not out yet, so I only took note. So many people selling jewelry, MLM products, and 3D printed things. I talked to one 3D printer guy about custom work. He said he has a designer friend who does programs for him, so I might be able to get some more cutters made - I told him I was thinking about fall and took his card.

I came home and there was a magazine from my college in the mailbox (also had three used books I ordered arrive) I don't donate to the college, so I only get the magazine sporadically. Can't remember when the last issue came, it's been a while. I flipped through it. There is a newsy section where people can send in significant life events. One page was short obituaries. An old friend died. We lost touch a long time ago. I had a kid and he had. a different approach to life? don't even know how to summarize Steve, one of our social group's repeating "games" was to narrate Steve's not so distant future obituary to him based on his current activity. (Set himself on fire, OD'd, blew himself up, skinned alive by a woman, destroyed a vehicle.) I looked up the full text online. The only thing in it that wasn't a surprise was the "former wife". (And even there we all predicted several if he lived long enough) And she wrote the obituary and clearly loved him.

He died of cancer, but not the lung cancer I was always saying he would get. He travelled to multiple countries, he wrote the book he said he was going to write (but only one) he married and had two kids who were the center of his life. He got involved with cub scouts! He was deeply and positively enmeshed in his community. Because it was posted on linked in, I know that his career was in the family business, which was his "until I get published or die, hopefully soon whichever it is" plan. But his job wasn't mentioned in his life story. He was only 58.

So I spent the afternoon doing pottery and thinking about Steve. I lost all track of time, but I threw a bunch of pots and I finished the hand building on two. Then I realized how late it was and shifted to planting the tomatoes, evaluations, and all my evening chores.

Today I'm going to the monthly pottery brunch, staying at the studio to surface finish pots, and coming home to do evaluations. It is almost "shift focus away from school" time.

This is a post I tried to post yesterday morning, but the button wouldn't work all day:

Good morning.

Lila, keep walking those dogs! Your stamina will improve. If you want to come cheer each other on in the decluttering your waistline thread I will check in there every day.

I don't think the house really got better or worse yesterday.
I did crank out a bunch of extra evaluations. My new minimum for today is six! (I only have 17 left to do)

My biggest accomplishment yesterday was the pottery studio. I only threw two pots, but my space is so much better (actually, only one of us would be able to see that.)

I went out, and I thought "I cannot work in this. This is an alligators situation." (When you're up to your *bottom* in alligators it's hard to remember that your original objective was to drain the swamp)

Normally when I work on cleaning up the studio, I start with the floor, because Dh has conditioned me over the years by looking at me in exasperation and saying "can you at least pick up the floor? Nobody can walk in here." Actually, *I* can walk in my mess. And starting with the floor gridlocks my surfaces. The floor is my preferred sorting zone, so I just put everything BACK on the floor when I am ready to deal with it and meanwhile it is just taking up all my storage and workspace.

So I asked myself what I needed. I needed a clear drying shelf, a functional throwing space, and a less cluttered hand building table. So I started to clear off the drying shelf (not the whole rack, just one shelf) and immediately ran into the "but-before-I-can"s (before I can this, I need that, etc)

When I looked around for something to shift, I realized that most of my shelf space was taken up with neatly sorted groups of mostly empty dried out glaze jars (if you all remember the glaze rehydrating project) that I thought I was going to steadily clear by starting at one end and getting to the other by the end of the year (spoiler alert, I didn't)

New plan. I threw them all in three boxes, labelled the boxes, and stacked them on a high shelf because they are light and meet my "is it acceptable if this falls on my head?" criteria for that shelf (I actually put a big yellow sign on the edge of that shelf that says "remember, whatever you put on here will eventually fall on your head.") when I run low on a color, I will dump them on the floor, find that color, rehydrate it, and put the rest back. When a color is gone, I will write that on the biggest box so I know I can just buy more of it.

That helped so much that I found nine pieces of bad pottery to throw out, plus some other random trash and recycling, cleared my drying shelf, cleaned up my throwing area, and made my hand building table functional and almost inviting.
Then I threw pots. I actually threw more than two, but only two were worth keeping.

I need some positive feedback from here that anything that makes it easier to use your space for its intended purpose is progress, because if Dh goes out there, he's going to look at the floor and ask "omg, what happened here?"

Sorry this is so long.

Anyway, today: feed store, stop at monthly farm and arts market about a mile from the feed store on the way home, six evaluations, lots of pottery, maybe some garden (it rained all day yesterday, the garden may be too wet, but I can at least plant one thing), keep up with the house.

Happy Saturday, friends. I am still sad and crying a lot, but I also have good days and I force myself to get up and make a difference. I am preparing for my next foster. And today I got a pedicure, which lifted my spirits. It has been since fall.

I also took one of those gift cards I have piled in a container and this one was for a coffee shop that no longer exists. There is a new shop in its place since fall, with new owners. So I thought, well why not? And I went there, and went up to the counter and said "hi, can I still use this $10 gift card from when this was X coffee shop?" and they smiled and said "sure!" and I got a coffee and a scone!

I am quite happy with how I have found so many old gift cards and am using them up before they expire or can't be used!

hmm SubC. I hope that there will be something for both of us that gives us better energy. I have thought that if I changed my diet, somehow, it would help. But I don't know. I think I will cut sugar way down and see if I feel any better. I have let sodas back in, and sugary coffee drinks, and even junk food candy and cookies. I tend to eat that kind of thing when upset or stressed, but I need to stop now.

This morning I:
- unloaded and loaded the dishwasher and ran it
- washed a few dishes by hand
- went through the fridge and threw out anything questionable
- put a load of my laundry in to wash
- took a bag of trash out
- pulled a paper bag full of weeds from my yard
- picked up the dog poo from the visitor last week

I have started to move things around and keep trying to sort in my room.

I am going to volunteer at the shelter today and also might stop by a store and use some more of my gift cards that are needing to be used.

Good morning.

Good choices Lila!

I am also perpetually exhausted. I used to think that someday I would get enough rest, but now I realize that I cannot do everything I want to do in life and so I will always be tired. Exhaustion is the only thing that stops me.

I try to convince myself I could actually get more done if I got more sleep, but my brain wakes me up in the morning and starts the list, and I stay up too late either pushing to finish things or too tired to go to bed. (I am really trying to work on the second one.)

So far this morning I have spent an hour shopping for shoes (my everyday shoes are worn through the lining in the back) I bought some on poshmark. Since it would take me thirty minutes to get to the nearest thrift store - where they are unlikely to have my shoes - I consider it an hour well spent.

My class went well last night. I got everything but a few small tasks done yesterday. I am learn8ng to make more manageable lists. Today is a "try to leave the house cleaner than it was when I woke up, evaluations, pottery" day. It's supposed to rain until evening.

My weight has been creeping up again too.