I just discovered my boyfriend (whom I adore) is a hoarder. This came about in the worse way possible when I cleaned out the much cluttered basement without asking first. I honestly believed he was simply overwhelmed by the job as even after buying a brand new home he couldn't manage to accomplish much more than setting up bedrooms and buying a dining room set (he sat in a broken wooden rocking chair for almost 2 years prior to finally purchasing a couch). When he came home and discovered I got rid of sand, old ripped blankets, mismatched sheets, plastic disposable flower pots and many other things he wasn't using and hasn't in the entire 2+ years we've been together he became beyond angry. I began to put two and two together and have now realized that while he's not a hoarder like you see on tv all the signs are there: excessive shopping, piles of things such as cheap floral cases, keeping all types of mail/magazines/books, boxes that are stacked floor to ceiling in the storage room and a garage that we can't even put the new car into. Since I realized that this beautiful, kind and highly intelligent man has a hoarding problem I have read everything online I can. What I would appreciate so much is if anyone can help me to understand the emotional damage I did by cleaning up and what, if anything I can do to make him feel better. I truly thought I was helping and want to help. I've apologized for causing harm.. I just don't know what else to do, I didn't understand the scope of what I was dealing with.
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