I couldnt get to sleep all night...i think i dozed a bit this morning...im just so deeply disappointed that my 'soulmate' is not who i thought he was......oddly, im.really looking forward to cleaning up more of the disgusting plastic bits on the ground! :D ~♡~Love to All!!~♡~

Anony
Time heals us. Some journeys we walk together seeking comfort and joy. My favourites have always been the longest walks home. I hope you are well today.

Tillie
Things are quiet. There is much to do. And all those I could remember asking if we ever needed anything. I've called upon them . I believe it best to bring a swift end to the drama. A large cleaning party of 3 strong cleaning leaders with 3 people each... and 4 vehicles.

My logic is a lesson in capacity. Something that I think has always eluded me. No hoard is so large that as many hands may carry time itself.

And with that I'm into the hoard.

HAPPY GROUNDHOG DAY :)
Haven't looked yet to see what the groundhog saw.

Hi Anonymoniker :)
WAY TO GO!!! for working to make your home a spider-free environment and getting up those tiny bits & pieces from the ground! :D


Hi Pain :)
OK, so when you say coffee what you really mean is a home made energy drink. That makes sense.
You have done FANTASTIC! toward getting that house all done! :D
Good Luck with your weekend plans.
You have a wonderful way of planning things out logically. ;)

Going into town this morning.
Raining right now but a major snow storm is predicted for the next few days.
So wonderful to have all the rain and snow this year!
We've been in severe drought conditions for way too many years.

TTYL :)

Hi everyone!
Ive been gradually getting some outdoor areas cleaned up & also finally dealing with that spider infested bureau from last summer!
Im also trying not to be effected by my ex now wanting me back again after that awful treatment.
Im going through a lot of processing of things & having important dreams. Im still going with that great feeling of cleaning up all those horrid tiny pieces of old tarps, plastic containers & debris that has been on the ground for a decade or 2...the only way to get it up is to take up all the top soil with it. It feels great! No decisions! I rigged up a trash can on a dolly so i can just keep going & hopefully either rent a truck or hire someone to run it all to the dump.
It has been a very intense time in many ways.
It sounds like everyone is getting some good stuff done! ~☆~♡~☆~

Hi everyone!
Ive been gradually getting some outdoor areas cleaned up & also finally dealing with that spider infested bureau from last summer!
Im also trying not to be effected by my ex now wanting me back again after that awful treatment.
Im going through a lot of processing of things & having important dreams. Im still going with that great feeling of cleaning up all those horrid tiny pieces of old tarps, plastic containers & debris that has been on the ground for a decade or 2...the only way to get it up is to take up all the top soil with it. It feels great! No decisions! I rigged up a trash can on a dolly so i can just keep going & hopefully either rent a truck or hire someone to run it all to the dump.
It has been a very intense time in many ways.
It sounds like everyone is getting some good stuff done! ~☆~♡~☆~

Grrr!
I'm trying to sleep. Just a wink before 3rd shift 10 hrs.
Mother in law knocks on door and starts in on me.
After the eighth sentence without a pause.
I clapped my hand 4 times.
Told her I want to hear her laugh.
. She just walked away.

I got to figure this out.
No way I'm letting mother in law control the house with unending drama.

Just got to stick to plan. Keep my mouth shut.
I know this week end I'm purposely putting pressure on mother in law to stay during the week. And she's here this week.
But I'll need her to go away Friday , Saturday , Sunday.

Tillie.
So glad you helped me see the limits. Not get exhausted, but not give up.
I could relax now , but I truly believe the mountains out of mole hills mentality is just too much strain. I'll mouth off . So I'm going all in this week end. Calling in everyone, paying some, Circling the wagons.
Once it's done I could leave while she's here without dragging it out.

OK rant over .
Good luck everyone.

just got back from storage unit.
have about two hours to sleep before work.
I got 9 hrs today .
as I was clearing wife's room .mother in law got my wife upset , not hard to do.
so just left to do something else on the task list.

I now have both storage units .
for 1 month .it's a total of 350 for 5 months.
by then I think I can purge enough to get a $50
unit which I feel is acceptable to keep a hoard from causing so much social angst.
I moved the counter top to the new unit.
and started moving wife's stuff to the new unit.
that way if she comes to it she wo t get distracted by what's in my daughter and I unit.

I know have room for the entire hoard in the units. I couldn't figure it out before. if the unit is to small then it keep the hoard in it. so the house. the common areas get hoard in it.

yeah I think I've went minimalist in the house.
but Considering the mice Infestation I need to get under the hoard and eliminate spaces they can nest. so I dont plan to keep our stuff in storage forevermore. just not allowing it to compromise our health and social functions.

the trash is out
the kitchen is clean.
the cars are tidy
the bathrooms have been disinfected.
the living room is a bedroom.
the dinning room just has a few dishes on the table.
the stairs are swept
the upstairs hallway is filled with tubs for storage.
daughters room has only a bed and clean clothes hung on hangers.
the drum room is clean and smells like vanilla.
the wife's room has a path .
the back room is tubbed up.

the plan is keeping moving forward.

tomorrow is laundry day. nothing else can happen until all the laundry is washed, dried, and putaway.

Friday I plan to push the hardest on the wife's room. reclaim the floor space.
nothing thrown away.
all in tubs.
all tubs photographed
scoop up loose ends into Xmas tree bag. sweep floor.
remove everything except furniture

Saturday take all tubs and bags to storage units. eat chili and watch a concert.

Sunday stay in the backroom until it is done.

Monday. rest
Tuesday trash day and kitchen
Wednesday bathrooms
Thursday laundry
Friday wife and daughters rooms
Saturday storage
Sunday rest
Monday. common areas

I think this is doable.

Tea is OK.
But it doesn't turn me Into a robot. Like coffee.

Well it isn't exactly coffee.

It's in a beer mug.
It's 1/2 dark coffee.
1/4 dark chocolate whey protein
1/4 dark chocolate cashew milk.

I use that same combo when I go to the gym.

Good to hear from you CM! And so pleased with your quilting at the church and painting. I'm so glad you had a nice time st lunch. I frequently treat people for lunch and I let people treat me. It's nice to be able to do it when I can and very nice to be on the receiving end.

I like your idea re the plants. You don't need to keep alll of your plants all of the time. Before I had my cat I used to enjoy having poinsettia plants at Christmas and I would throw them out when the holidays were over. Some people take great pride in keeping them alive but for me, I'd rather just let them go. I am getting used to the idea of it being ok to temporarily enjoy something/I don't need to make a lifelong commitment to every object in the home. In fact, I'm trying to break up with as much as possible!

Anony--are you up for a quick drive by?

Hi all,

Just little things, but it's been a good day. I went to my quilt guild at church. I so enjoy quilting with the ladies. And since I'm poor as a church mouse (pun intended) it feels good to be able to contribute my skills for something that helps make a bigger amount for the church than I ever could contribute in dollars of my own. They've been running a deficit so they need it.

Then one of the gals whom I've only recently met there treated me to lunch! I've been wanting to get to know her better. We had a good time, and then went to JoAnn Fabrics. I didn't buy anything I didn't need, just replaced a broken paintbrush.

Then I went on my own to Walmart and got that tub for my doll clothes trims, and came home and got out the new paintbrush and my paints, and did some on a rework of a painting that I've carted around for several years. The colors were UGLY - I had been using up old paint. Now I'm overpainting with better colors. My paintings are abstract expressionist so I just play around with color, line, and form, and embellishments till I like how a painting looks. I'd say with this one I'm about halfway there.

Letting the paint dry now, and will do more on it tomorrow or whenever. It's hard to find a spot with clear work space and good lighting to spread my painting stuff out here where I'm renting a room. But I found a spot that was good enough for this stage. The next stage is where I'll be more meticulous; today I was just covering the old ugly paint to be able to re-envision the piece.

Having the creative juices flowing feels so good! Now I'll turn my attention to putting the doll clothes trims in their tub, since the sun will be going down soon and it'll be harder to paint anyway. I'm eager for spring, when my roommate's large plants will go outdoors and the house will be more roomy.

A couple of my plants are large and they'll go out too. They are "special" ones from each of my parents' funerals. I enjoy plants but have decided at this stage in my life to not try to overwinter plants other than the Mom & Dad ones. This year I'm going to get plants I'm sure will die off come fall! That will teach me to live in the moment, and keep my roommate from urging me to bring any of them indoors.

Because someday when I get my own place again, this is one of the ways I'm going to live more minimalist. If I decide to have plants, and they die, they die. Maybe I get new ones, maybe not. Due to my physical restrictions on heavy lifting, I don't plan to get any new ones that need huge pots. I can go to the botanical gardens or a plant nursery and stroll around if I feel a need for a "plant fix." It's free and I can see, even photograph, way more species and I won't need to own them to enjoy them! :)

Just a jot.
I'm realizing how depressed I am.
Made an appointment with a clinical therapist.
I'm not suicidal. Just depressed.
I don't want to naval gaze too much .

I got cornered by mother in law. She trying to make me feel bad for the hoarding especially for cleaning everything else but where her daughter sleeps. It made me very angry Inside. If it were a man I would have handed the dude a trash bag and bought beer. But since it's her mother I just stood there and cowed.

I have to over come the drama. It's very weird. Now when think about cleaning wife bedroom it's like a strong overwhelming mood makes me want to laydown.in the past I used to selfmedicate with beer.

Well I there's other things going on. I know I should expect to be depressed . 1 I'm in a sexless marriage for very long time. Not that I in her state I would be appropriate anyway. But has been more than ten years. So where I know I'll grieve it won't be the same . I often drift into thinking what single life will be like. She's been sick for so long I don't want her life to end . But she often refers to wanting to pass. We argue so much over mole hills. Ill miss her but I sorta look forward to not being emasculate so often.

So with that I think I need to see a therapist.

The back room is coming g along .
Strategically I've made it to a stopping point.
Where if my guests want to help with carting.
It will help get very close to the backroom being cleared completely.

So I I have have high Confidence that Sunday I can get help carrying In the really big couch.
It's already bought .

So now I'm self medicating with caffeine. And it makes me moody- irritable. I'm working on wife's room. She's doesn't want me in there and is angry and upset . But her mom is goading me to keep going. It's like having two of them in the house.
The only way I know how to put into words.
They both voice their frustrations but do nothing.
They make me feel depressed.
So I just keep focused on my own plan. Draw on my own strengths. I'm real ed to keep at it to very last piece. To then empty and clean the sweepers and trash cans . To the level of completely done.

The weirdest thing is like they don't ever talk about how bad it was. Only how bad it is. I'm all for living in the moment but it's ridiculous. And I see it as ridiculous. Wife and mother in law FEEL there is 100 things to do . I've done 80 of them.
They still want nag about the 20 left to do without acknowledging the 80. I'm betting that when I do reach completion. There will still be unappreciative drama. It's very overwhelming.

I do appreciate mother in law dominating in The kitchen. It's being Maintained. So I don't walk Into big abandoned messes. And don't have to spend time cooking. Mother in law is feeding us well and when she leaves we have food in the freezer.
I can tell my wife wants to just have the family time In the kitchen like we did when I got the kitchen clean and they messed it up and I kept cleaning it. So I'll work on that issue after I get the hoard organized. Thing is . The house may become hoardless. But the hoard still exists in storage. .

I thinks that was when I got hit with feelings of being overwhelmed. When I see what I'm doing is separating from my wife even before she passes. It'll be in 4-6 months possibly suddenly.
I mean to say I've separated all our clutter. In the storage bin. I made it so that what I consider to be crap that no one but she would want can just be dumped. And my daughters stuff can go with my daughter and mine. Can be purged.
So it's like looking into the future. Making plans on what will need to be done when she's not with us anymore. Its feelings. I mean I feel lime a bull in a China shop. The hoard has to go. Nothing I can do about my wife.
No matter how they make me feel. I know I'm making our home a livable place for all our family and friends to come visit and stay if they wish.

Looking forward to Chili fest.
And looking forward to going to my brothers for a Superbowl.

Tillie we are in sync. That cheers me up.

Working from home so day is going better. I have to go in tomorrow and I don't want to. I am generally the happiest person in any office and I am extremely unhappy these days. I couldn't stop crying yesterday. So terrible. But I'll work on that later.

For now, I'm going to get dressed and surprise mom with lunch. I've washed donation duvet and it's drying now. I need to get recycling out. Tillie it adds up so quickly--orange juice container, milk container, coffee can, etc. we recycle everything paper, plastic and glass. So that's good but it's shocking how quickly it adds up. I'll take to bin in way to mom's.

Trying not to be so upset.

HAPPY FEBRUARY ;)

Good Morning Everybody

Hi Tatoulia :)
Yes, the rugs are those old fashioned handmade braided oval rugs.
Good Luck selling your artwork!
Glad you have decided to put off any more diary purging since it was upsetting to go through them right now.
Sorry you have received a large unwanted gift that needs to hang around for a while. (((hugs)))


Another dark dreary day...
Should do some housework even though I really don't want to.
Maybe tomorrow I should go grocery shopping.
We'll see.
But it would be good for me to get out of this house for a while, maybe even talk to a human.
;D

Tillie I am sorry you are down. I'm excited for your rag rugs. I tell me, are they anything like those braided oval rugs I grew up with? How I loved those. Mom always had a small one by the kitchen sink and then a large one in her bedroom. Such an easier time.

I will get through my art this weekend, let BF take first dibs, then hope consignment shop has some luck with them. Would be fun to get a little money.

I need this keep cleaning and purging. I have to lay off the diaries, even though I'm almost there. Reading them is surprisingly upsetting.

I am comfortable with my choice on the duvet. I'll wash it tomorrow.

Ugh. A friend sent me a very thoughtful, very large gift that I would never buy or use or even admire in the store. No interest in it all. Normally I just immediately get rid of such stuff, but I can't in this case. I'm going to have to clear space to save it. She will likely visit me this summer and I'll keep for one visit here but not beyond that.

Hi Everybody :)

Hi Tatoulia :)
Happy you have come to a comfortable decision. :D
It's important that we remember that we can keep what we want when decluttering.
Nobody has to let go of so much that they make minimalists jealous of them.
While helping my neighbor friends downsize into an RV and one storage unit, on decision making I would always say "I want there to be no regrets".
This greatly helped them make all those difficult keep/toss/donate decisions.
Just checked and you posted while I was composing.
(((((HUGS)))))
Sorry work made you so unhappy.
Treat yourself kindly (((hug)))

Hi Pain :)
WAY TO GO!!! for selling some more items! :D
Is there any reason why you must tell your mother when you sell something?
Since it could set her off maybe you could just not tell her?
My own mother would always give me stuff I did not want and tell me that I MUST keep it forever.
When she would ask where it was I would say I stored it in the garage loft waaayyy in the back where it was safe.
Of course that was a lie but it kept her off my back.
Good luck getting that chili party going and getting some much needed help to get things done there.
Those mice need to be hunted down and evicted.
Sorry your good mouser isn't there to help.

Cloudy cold dark overcast day today.
Cats & I are sorta depressed, wanted to go outside again and play.
Spent the day watching Netflix and making the rag rug fabric strips.

TTFN

Wow, Pain, you are getting so much done. Very impressive.

Another hard day at work. I am for the first time very unhappy with my job. I cried for about 40 minutes at work today.

I will go to bed soon. I'll do laundry tomorrow and work in some bags of stuff. I texted with consignment shop and I can bring my stuff a week from Sunday.

I know that at the sailing club we all put in community time .
Some us do different tasks.
One of those tasks is to bring Chili.

I thought that was odd.

Then a few years later my neighborhood block organised a clean up.

They also served Chili. And some how more people came after the Chili .
I never forgot that .
Chili equals free help.
Even more help if you turn it into a Chili contest.

I could care less. But some people take a Chili Co test like a serious challenge.

So I'll see if I can make that work for me too.
I don't think I'd get much help if the house was still a giant hoard of mess.
I'm betting that since the downstairs is almost clean. And people are wanting to help my wife.
I have a good chance of getting to the end of the end game.

I've sold another $25. Of the storage stuff.
Toys my daughter no longer wants.

My mom found out I'm selling toys and has demanded getting them back. Serious drama coming out of her mouth , including intelligence insults.
I have the type of mother that's gives us framed art to put on the walls. And gets voicestrous and upset when we don't use it.

So I keep my mom away becausecshe doesn't help , just stirs up drama.
Maybe when it's all done. I'll bring her in . But she's a hypochondriac and bugs my wife with guessing o. She should or not be doing about having cancer.

Plus I think my mother in law might harm my mother one these days . So I keep them separated.

Today is trash day. So I went through the whole house with trash bags in my back pocket. And got as much outside as I could. I still have more trash than the trash men will take.

The neighbors are good about letting me fill their cans. But still too many.

I'll clear my car when the can is empty.

So this morning before the trash man is coming I'm in the wife's room . I have the OK from her to gather trash. It's already almost all bagged up. And in the hall. I feel like I'm lying to her .
Because I'm actually getting her things packed up to bring downstairs . I don't want to say what looks like in there. But it's a daunting hoard.
Her mom was mad at me for letting it get like that.
And not cleaning it first instead of the rest of the house.
It goes in one ear and out the other . Honestly I see where my wife gets her god blame you BS.
WIFE still doesn't want me to do anything in her room. At this point with only 2 rooms left. Wether she moves to the downstairs or not.
I'm not going to leave her hoard in its present state. It dangerous , she sends me and daughter in there to look for stuff and it's we'll it's piled up . There no sense in keeping it that way.

My plan for her room is to make it the same as the storage unit. A wall of tubs labeled and photographed. . Currently there is not even a path to walk. So I will tub it up all of it. So I can sweep the floor. The key is it must be organised well enough that my daughter and I can fetch her items on demand. I know it will stress her out.

So I'm trying to get her mother to take her to NANN house . For a church service, before she'll be unable to go.
Then pounce on the hoard in respectful manner.

There is still mice in the two room with hoards I. Them. I bought a large bucket of baits and gave 50 bait placements. In almost every corner of every room and basement and porches.
The only place I hear them stirring is In the remaining hoards.

When my wife got sick this last summer . She gave our cat to her cousin. But he was mouser. And now we're infested with mice.
Was the primary reason for purging the living room and kitchen. Which has gotten me started in the first place. Honestly I miss the little predator.

Hi Tillie! Thanks for the advice. I changeout my bedding seasonally too. I have fewer comforters now, having gotten rid of three of them during the storage clean out and then another one last weekend. I'm down to some pretty layered pieces on my bed, which I switch out during the summer. So right now I have sheets, warm blanket, very thin white quilt, then a taupe shiny thin quilt (like gold satin but more of a cafe an lait color) that I keep folded at foot of bed during day then the comforter with duvet. In summer it's the thin white quilt with the gold thin quilt. I am able to change it up that way without having to own too much stuff. And if I get bored, I'll just add another piece and get rid of what I am using now

OKAY, after talking this out with you (and I am grateful for your advice) I am ready to get rid of the duvet. Thank you so much. I needed to work through it. And the permission to keep it was greatly appreciated.

Pain, thank you for your posts. It does help to be here--and hearing about what you are doing and how you are doing it is very, very helpful. A chili party sounds like fun! A good relaxing time to celebrate your hard work!!

Hi Pain :)
Having a chili party sounds great!
Definitely hope you do that.
Having people over is one of the best motivations there is and it's good for the soul too. :D

Hi Tatoulia :)
That ivory and red embroidery duvet sounds lovely.
I will tell you what I would do and it's something that I do do.
I enjoy changing out things seasonally.
I have two different sets of drapes for some windows.
I have about 6 light weight sheer, frilly curtains that I enjoy swapping out throughout the summer.
I have three shower curtains.
I have a red duvet, red is my favorite color,
and a lighter weight purple comforter.
I have plans to make more rag rugs so that I can swap them out too.
I have a selection of blankets of different weights, materials and colors.
I enjoy the changes. They are simple and easy to do but they make a big difference in the rooms.
I have the space to store these things without cramming & stuffing them in.
I like change in my surroundings, I feel that it keeps things fresh and interesting.

So, if you don't want that pretty duvet
then go ahead and donate it.
Please don't feel that you must only have one of something just because you are decluttering.
If you are still sitting on the fence about the decision what I recommend is that you put it in a big clean bag, set it aside for a while.
Come back to it in a few weeks and see how you feel about it.


Now that I have completely confused Tatoulia here's what we did today...
It got all the way up to 50 degrees!!!!
All the cats and I went outside. I had the door open and opened some windows to get the clean fresh air inside.
I got the snippers and pruners out and did some snipping and pruning.
Still eating what's here in the house, still haven't grocery shopped.
Today I cooked some dry pinto beans, added a packet of dry onion soup mix and some water and 7 tiny packets of ketchup from Burger King that were in the fridge since last October.
Also opened a can of Mandarin orange sections.
Not doing too bad! :D

Scooter got some different eye drops and a possible new diagnosis.
The Vet thinks it may be an allergic problem compounded by going improperly diagnosed for too long, causing some other issues.

I get my determination because I'm here.
I know it's weird , I'm guessing.
If I don't have my wife's approval I stall.
If she naggs I stall.

If I Come here and vent and plan. I sorta don't need or care what my wife wants. It would be different if she were taking care of herself.

But since she can longer put my plan off , or dominate my mood about clearing rooms. I only need the energy.
I drink a protein coffee..

It's got enough caffeine in it and sugar. That I seem to just well up with need to do something .
I simply can't sit still.

I have already planned out In hierarchical check list of tasks .

If I go Into room . Fully charged on sugar and caffeine.
Start on the biggest check boxes.

I sometime use my smartphone alarms to refocus o. The check lists. So if I become distracted the alarms prompt me to refocus on the check boxes.

.............
I'm feeling high.
I have depression. Not just from my wife. However I'm almost to the everything clean stage. I've only gotten to that point 5 times in my life. My social life improves, and more people makes for more opportunities to enjoy the small things.

I kinda got slow on going the rest of the way.
So I get out the hierarchical outliner . And make plans.

I came up with a scheme.

I have invited my family and friends to a Chili dinner to help me Finnish . I'm betting on my tendency to get started before they come and get even closer.

Critical Mass.
I don't know if this will make a difference for you you. A few years agi I bought a really huge tub with large wheels . It travels .

Of course because I'm a hoarder the tub got full. And when I couldn't get past the the full tub problem I would go months without purging anything g. So the large tub. Just became another part of my hoard.
I learned to get tubs all the same size if they are meant to stack. I learned to make a wall of tubs in one room of the house , keep a countertop in that room and use it just for the work space to keep the roller tub purged . But of course that just became part of the hoard too.

What finally made it. Fluid and flexible.

I keep two tubs inside the roller tub with a policy not ever just put clutter in the roller tub , but in the Shelving tubs inside the roller tub.

That became partridge the hoard.

I finally broke the hoard spiral.

I went to harbor freight. It's a low cost tools only outlet. I bought a large 4 wheel cart . The metal one with solid base and fold down handle.
I could stack 8 tubs on it 4 high.
All labeled. Papers, art supplies, clutter upstairs,tools and dishes, Me,wife, daughter.

I push it around easily , and I keep baggies for projects that have loose pieces, and trash bags .

This became part of the hoard.

However when I'm ready to purge or organize I have a process that makes sense to me, and I only have to spend time with it and I reclaim spaces .
It's so empowering to know I can get far if I just put in the time, because I've got a method that makes sense to me.

Mother in law finally left. I stopped asking if she was staying longer. I could see that she was seeing my wife's illness is advancing . I offered no drama. Discussed very little. Just kept feeding her. She said she be back on the week end.
She's retired . I wish she would stay when I'm working on week days.
I think I'll manipulate her a few times to see if she gravitate to weekdays. Plus having a Chili party on Superbowl weekend I'm hoping the same opportunity. Of having 4 people able to make a bucket brigade and talk then into a half hour or more of me. Putting hoard clutter into tubs out to the porch. I've been spending a little time in my wife's room . Quietly clearing the trash. Family gets disgusted with going hands on the trash. But put it on a tub and they would carry it around the mall. Sorry just being goofy.


I'm just guessing here so please understand I'm just trying to figure it out loud.

I have trouble completing things. So clearing space and the cleaning it us no different. If I ask for help . Especially from those who offer it, and those that jump right in without having to talk about first.

My sister in law.
My cousin Doug and his son.
My friend Ken.

I'll mention. To my mom and brothers that I need help but I'll let them volunteer.

More gets done in the end game when I'm not alone.
More gets done when I scoop up the loose ends into a Christmas bag and take it storage .

It's nice to have. So much food coma g out of the kitchen again. Her mother spent 4 hours in there yesterday scrubbing things I can't figure out why needs scrubbing. But I just stay away and let her do what she wants . I consider it her putting her foot in . And trying to dominate the kitchen as her space. I think that's about right @ the Psych level. But I'm just guessing.
I've discovered a great couch at a mission thrift store. When the pillows are removed it's as big as a twin sized bed. And the cushions are more supportive than mattress , and all one piece. So no
Lumpy voids.
They're open on Saturday. I could ask my brother for his van and hope he comes along sigh it.
He did sound like he wanted to bring chili.

It would be great if that all came together.

Tax money makes getting the bigger storage bin at the same storage facility possible .
So I will go tomorrow and upgrade . And. Buy the couch large couch.

It's so deep and long the only thing that fit In the back room will be the couch and the big hutch .

I think I can make it into a wardrobe. Sorta.
And use the laundry room as place to put clothes on hangers.

If I can do all that and not wear out . It'll be done.
Maybe encourage daughter to have a sleep over and offer mall money to help carry tubs to the porch.



That will be a clean house.
But the hoard will still exist in the storage unit.
When I think about it there my stomach feels like knots. Hopefully with time I'll get used to it.

I'll set up a regular online payment so if something happens it won't get confiscated in an absence.


.......

Tillie I'm sorry for the pressure I'm about to put on you. Could you tell me what to do with the ivory and red duvet. I'm going to wash it in Wednesday and I need someone to tell me what to do with it. I need someone to tell me to donate it.

Hello everyone! CM--keep up the good work. Please don't feel that you have to stop mentioning the car repairs--we are here by your side. So do it for you, not for us. I am as frustrated as you are and wish there were some way to speed it up for you. Your work in the meantime is going great!! Congratulations!

Tillie, I'm sorry the weekend went so poorly. I'd think he'd love be the idea of having to buy a new toilet. What a shame. How did scooter go today at vet? Poor little thing.

Pain, what you are accomplishing is amazing. I don't know where you get your strength and determination!

I am gathering up artwork to consign. I could just take it to goodwill but I'd like to see if I can get something for it. Mainly framed black and white photographs. A few other things too.

I washed a duvet cover today/plain white cotton/want to put on my bed now. Not sure what to do with the ivory one with red embroidery. I love it but not sure I need two duvet covers. I bought it many years ago and have gotten rid of the pillow shams. I got rid of a lot of bedding and have enjoyed alternating between the two. But maybe it's time.

Garbage out. Shredded two more diaries. Only about seven or eight left at this point.

Good Morning Everybody :)

Hi Tatoulia :)
You have done fantastic this month!
Having a percentage goal has been very motivating for you. (((HUGS)))

Hi Pain :)
How's it going?

Just another very sad and discouraging weekend here.
Again he did nothing to improve the living conditions here and he went "shopping" and brought home more useless stuff.
The toilet hasn't been fully flushing for months now.
I have done everything to fix it but it's just too ancient and worn out.
Needs to be replaced.
He gets nasty to me whenever I mention it.
Scooter's (the cat) eyes still hurt and he has a Vet appointment today.
I keep saying I think it's allergies but the Vet has yet to try that diagnosis.
Yesterday afternoon was beautiful but cold so the cats & I all went outside for half an hour and played in the garden. :D

Tomorrow is the last day of January 2017.
Look back at all you have accomplished and be proud. :D

Hi everyone, happy start of a new week!

I sure hope it will be the week my van gets the repairs done. Yes, I am still waiting. Friday it didn't happen. Left a message with mechanic about an hour ago, haven't heard anything back. I'm trying so hard not to become discouraged about this. It irritates me of course that the whole business affects the portion of my decluttering plans involving trips to the storage unit. Guess I'll just have to do more here at the house in the meantime.

With all that in mind, I'm going to refrain from posting about the subject of vehicle repairs anymore until that happy day, God willing, when I can announce the work has been completed. It's just getting too tiresome to post these ups and downs; I feel like a broken record. So that's that for that.

This weekend I had some good accomplishment, though. I love it when I start in intending to do just a little and more comes of it.

I went out to the storage unit Saturday, and did the following:

--located a book I wanted to look at

--took the doll clothes crafting ribbons and trims out of drawers and put them in flat plastic storage boxes that had been emptied by the Great Yarn Destash of 2016

--sorted a few of my doll clothes in progress sweater boxes to locate trims that could consolidate into those large trim boxes. I no longer meet with the other ladies weekly for sewing sessions, so I can re-centralize the location of all ribbons/trims.

--compacted the contents of two large cardboard boxes that have been riding around in my van since my move mid-2015. Put the stuff to keep in a plastic tub that was empty, and ditched the cardboard boxes, clearing more space in the van.

--with the flattened boxes and some miscellaneous, that made a black trash bag full to go in the dumpster at the storage place!

--found a few bits of lace to add to my latest donation bag. I start a new bag as soon as I get rid of a batch of donations, even if I just have one small item. Having a bag going makes me look for more things to go in it.


@Pain - you are doing so well under very trying circumstances and I like your ideas. Especially the tubs. It sparked an idea for future sessions at the storage - I have one really big tub and I'm going to use it as a holding tub during work sessions. That'll help me be able to move around in there and access the shelves. I have shelves that are available to hold things but several of them are just sitting empty while stuff is piled in front of them! Using the "dump tub" to hold that stuff, then sort it and put what stays on the shelves neatly will be a big help. So thanks for the idea.

Word of advice I have to give because my mom was diabetic and my ADD gets so much worse if my own blood sugar dips - be careful about being too jacked up on sugar, caffeine and adrenaline - make a point to get some protein in there too for the steady fuel, okay? ;) That way you won't crash suddenly. I have an anxiety disorder too so that's a deterrent for me against excess caffeine usage, and I've cut back on sugar since surgery last fall, so I could lose some weight. I find that I'm not having the sugar swings and bottoming out and it feels good not to have them. Your Mileage May Vary, I know, but just passing along my own experiences for what they're worth. Good luck with everything! :)

Hello everyone! Good to read your posts.

I am doing laundry and some puttering. I got rid of a comforter today and I took some things that my brother wanted. I am doing laundry and throwing stuff out. Going to call January 10% and for February looking for 30%. The fact this isn't realistic is irrelevant. I have identified one piece of furniture that could potentially go. I do have a piece I want to get rid of but not until I find a replacement and I'm in no rush. I have exactly the furniture I want in my home. It's the other stuff.

So my 30% challenge lives on. Just need to reduce, reduce, reduce. And I believe in myself. I do have some artwork that I will be looking to consign. I should probably get that together and put a date on my calendar to do that.

Good Morning Everyone :)

Yes, sometimes when the message board is slow to load, The Daily Chat does not appear until you refresh the page.

It's just a computer programming glitch.
When this site was first created there was not a Daily Chat thread.
Just the help and information threads.
The Daily Chat was added on later and that's why sometimes when the site is slow to load, it doesn't show up.

Ever since I installed Windows 10 on my computer
I have experienced fewer problems accessing sites around the internet.
I have fewer problems with logging in and posting too.

Deleting browsing history and cookies regularly helps keep computers running smoothly.

I know this does not help people posting from phones or using other browsers besides Windows.
I know nothing about other systems, but maybe there is some computer maintenance that can be done to help. ?

Hi Pain :)
WAY TO GO!!!!
Getting them motivated to clear out the space! :D

This is the link to the "view full site" link.

http://www.hoardingcleanup.com/Message_Board/?msgbrd=3

I wonder if the Daily chat was visible on this page too Instead of not discoverable from view full site.

I'm thankful this site exists.
But with the Daily chat being a sub category. This site seems nearly void of activity from the outside. And there's strength in numbers.

Yes
I have to find this thread From a different section .
It's like the Daily chat isn't In front or on top.

I have to navigate to it. I have to know where to find it.

Since my last post 1/27 Friday morning at 5:51AM, I have not been able to access this board.

The Message Board has always been slow to load and often does not include the "Daily Chat" thread. I have to reload, often two or three times, to get the Daily Chat to show up on the main Message Board. The last two days I have been unable to access the Daily Chat at all.

If I didn't know this thread exists I would have stopped looking for it. Anyone else having this problem?

Poked my head in bAck room.
It shouldn't be hard. BUT I know I have alot of emotional attachments to the things in there.
I'll start with the holiday decorations. Because they take up alot of space and have no attachments.
Now I'm painted Into a corner if you know what I mean. Its gotta be good enough to live in like a bedroom. I don't think a good plan will do it.
I'll have to get a bigger storage unit. Or at least a second smaller one.maybe possibly a second unit just for selling and donations. Tax money will help with buying more tubs while they're still on sale.
The smaller ones are cheaper but work better as single layer organizers if I photo them.

That's good enough for today. I'll go buy them now to stay away from mother in law. Not like we fight , just that were not ever been friendly. I know she wants me downstairs so she can have them all upstairs together. But the reality is my wife can't get up and down the stairs. And me and my wife will downstairs together with mother in law. ALOT.
So I'll just stay away till someone comes up with same idea I have about NANN and wife downstairs .
Dad ,Daughter with her friends upstairs.

NANN come Monday through Thursday
I'll be downstairs Friday through Sunday.

Well just thinking out loud.
Lol. I mean typing it out.

Thank you Tillie
Your perspectives are so spot on. Thank you.

Today was a wonderful day.
The first day this house was tidy since we moved in.
I woke them up to foods smells from the kitchen.
Bacon, eggs, pancakes, and coffee.

We ate on the big table.

My daughters friends knocked on the door around noon. They the house was spotless and came in.
I offered grilled cheeses and fries. They accepted.
While my wife laid down. I had my daughter and her friends cornered In the dinning room.
Two of the three girls play guitar ,well they're learning. I told my daughter if she cleans her room all the way . I'd buy her an electronic drum set. The big one . They stared at each other for a few moments. The like a tornado in Oklahoma there was debris flying down the stairs. I was hoping something like this would happened.
They got it all out . Even the good stuff. My daughter was reluctant ,bug her friends just kept at it two more friends came In from her best friends facebook friends.
Her room is now plastered with posters of scary looking rock stars. I did have to help when some drama got started. But I'm trained at crisis Intervention. I distracted them it was easy.
I said where we going to put it (the drum kit) It was like letting the air out of a balloon.

Right then NANN my wife's mom. My MIL. came in and saw what was going on. She pulled me aside and said if I clean out the back room downstairs - which is a 7x15 porch made into part of the house.
I could sleep there . And my wife and daughter could sleep upstairs and use my as a drum practice room. So I put it out there while I had 8 people in help mode. Clear out my room too and get the drums today. Like a bomb went off . It was cleared In an hour. It wasn't bad anyhow. But now is completely emptied...

So I took all that wanted to go to guitar center. And bought a used electronic drum kit. While NANN fixed dinner.

I know I'm about to get exhausted. So I cut out after setting it up. Only the two guitar players stayed. And NANN has some alone time with her daughter.

I've spent the rest of the day putting the tubs in storage. At a slow pace. Drinking coffee. Im sober three years now. As long as I have coffee I don't want to go back to being an alcoholic. I just have know that the caffeine makes me jittery and testy with in laws. So to stay away from the other emotional tigers like myself.

I plan to get home . And no matter what's going on . I'll just clean the kitchen.
I'll wait till next week to see if anyone makes the suggestion to bring my wife's bed downstairs. I already suggested that NANN stay in the drum room for tonight on the blow up bed. She agreed due to slick roads.

This leaves only two rooms left.

P.S. the electronic drums attachment fits my daughters computer. The computer fits the 55 inch television in my room. So I left it in there. With the headset . The drums are silent to the downstairs. But she was watching you tube drumming g lessons from chromecast and using the computer software she could see on the TV Too.. she's having fun and has some friends in the house again.
Chokes me up.

That's all for now.

I'm in purge mode.
I'm ADD-inattentive.
IM ON sugar and caffeine. Highly motivated.
Not listening, don't care what anyone says , not focused on anything else but the dinning room , the whole Dinning room, and only the dinning room.

It's contents are secondary, however I'm strategic that I'm not just unstacking piles From the dinning room and restacking in other rooms.
All the valuables have been put in single layers In The tubs. All papers have been taken to the scanning desk. The extremely large rolling tubs I keep for each room are full.
I have got down to 90% cleared. I'm taking a break to draw on my creativity for the end game.

My problem is I'm out tubs. If I buy more I wont have places for them.
-------------:::::
OK I've figured out what I'm going to do.
I have 12 Xmas tree bags (hoarded)
I'm just going to stuff the rest of the clutter , into the really big bag, just to contain It. This will usurp timd of the sorting process.
---------::::
All the floor is cleared.
All the tubs are on the front porch.
The really big bag is dragged to the porch.
-------
I've cleaned the dinning table.
Very tired, having a sugar drop.
This has been 12 hours since I started.
This a good stopping point.

I've discovered my wife is more sick than she has been telling me. My emotions s are a whirl of dismay, disconnect, and denial. I no know why she's so upset. She just wants Peace. While I am an emotional Tiger. Daring with my tale. We almost can't get along even when we both agree.

I'll be done with the street level this weekend.
And I'll focus on peace. And just Maintain
I'll keep on next week making the hoard In the back room into a sleeping area. So her mom can Come stay. I want her to go to hospice, but I'm not voicing my opinions about it. I feel like an ass,
I mean I think you guys might understand why I'm pushing to get it done while Im Motivated. But it has to be done with compassion. I was the family member that stayed with my dad as he becAme ambulatory until he passed. My wife is nearer to that point than I thought. I know she doesn't see how close it is either. I'm no doctor, not a nurse . But I've seen it before. How am I going to feel knowing I was cleaning house while ignoring her. Well I'm beating myself up I think.
--------:::::
She took meds and went to sleep.
I cleaned the floors, Window, aND table.
Her mom is coming In The morning.
Good night.
Sorry for not writing back on the personals.
Your all in my thoughts. You guys give me strength somehow. I hope to give some of it back when you need it someday. Thank you!

Hello everyone!

Joan I am glad you are working through your health problems & congrats on your refrigerator victory!

Hello to everyone. Another tough day at work but managed to finish a project and I hope to feel relieved soon. I don't feel it yet.

Tillie I am feeling mostly healed today in abdomen area & haven't seen any sign of internal injury. I don't think it will slow me down this weekend. I'm not at the 30% and won't be by end of weekend but I've made favorable progress and I'm happy about that! I will take the comforter to goodwill this weekend and I have another bag of clothes. I don't think I can shred tonight. My eyes are tired. I'm running dishwasher and will Heat up some turkey soon.

I was only able to skim the posts because my eyes are sore. I'll catch up later.

Well, today was to have been the vehicle repairs day, and my mechanic and I were in communication earlier. So I was guardedly optimistic. But now it's after 4:00 p.m. here so I dunno. I know he had other cars ahead of me. The issue of my place in the overall queue is a complicated one. I think it has to do some with him doing business out of his home and he also does plumbing. Between that and his family there are frequent emergencies. I don't know for a fact but I may also be lower priority since he tries to help me out financially. *makes attempt at philosophical sigh*

To not get all antsy, I've done other things. Checked bank account and other stuff online, sorted more sewing lace. The lace will be evaluated as to whether it can go quickly onto doll dresses I plan on making very soon. Otherwise it may go away. The leftovers will certainly go away.

Also drew a design for part of the quilt top I've got in the works for church. I really like how it came out. Doing artistic and creative things makes my brain happy. Keeps away the ADD brain mode where I just have two settings, "Impulsive" or "Indecisive." The impulsive side is the part that bought too much stuff or jumps from one unfinished project to another like a bunny on espresso. The indecisive part is the sloth on tranquilizers that crawls mournfully amidst the wreckage that the bunny wrought.

Good Morning Everyone :)

Hi Anonymoniker :)
Thank You (((HUG)))
Wonderful to read your optimistic post today! :D

Hi CriticalMass :)
Thank You (((HUG)))
All those "little" things you did really add up.
Way To Go! for all that tidying at the storage and finding more to donate. :D

Hi Tatoulia :)
((((((((gentle hugs))))))))
Hope nothing is seriously hurt. :(
Don't push yourself if you are hurting.
Get some sleep and rest.
Not meeting our goals within the set time frame is alright if we get sick or injured.

Hi Pain :)

Hi Joan :)
Way To Go! for getting the compost recycled :)

The sun is shining and no rain or snow, just frosty cold.
Would like to get out of the house for a while but will stay home and do things here.
No place to go anyways except the store and I am forcing myself to use up all the food I have here first.
I can put off grocery shopping for another few days :D
Today I will cook rice and a bag of frozen stir fry veggies.
But this morning I will get back to my sewing project and doing the usual daily maintenance.

TTFN :)

Morning everyone, Tillie, Tatoulia, Anony, Critical, Pain. Glad everyone seems well.

I am finally able to rest properly because health issues are resolving. In my case, people were quick to victimize me because of my hoarding, but that has been just an outward sign of a deep problem that is finally resolved. It is another case of "blame the victim". Now that the situation is resolved those people will have to find a new victim to blame, or else deal with their own issues.

I am not thinking about the hoarding now. I am working on an immune system problem that recently started to be corrected by a good allergist. I was pleased, however, that when I took my mulch - I keep in it the fridge until it is time to go food shopping, as they have a mulch bin there - anyway, when I took my mulch in yesterday, I included two semi-rotted and semi-frozen apples that had been in my hydrator for years. Only other hoarders can appreciate this as progress. I rate myself not so much on how much I remove, but more on how comfortable I am removing it and how old it is.

Have a good day, everyone!

Quick drive by! Glad to hear from Tillie & CM & Anony & Pain. WTG everyone!

Just got home from work. Going to probably just go lay down. I am extremely tired. I slipped at work today, one of the soap dispensers had fallen apart and there was a clear layer of liquid soap all over the restroom floor. I was propelled right into the sink counter and my abdomen is very painful/straight across where I hit the counter. I think it will be ok, I just need to wait for the bruising to finish coming out and then heal.

I'll head to bed soon. Just so glad to hear from everyone.

This is my last weekend in January & there's still plenty to go before the 30% less of everything has occurred! Still feeling good about it. I will work hard this weekend, as always, with your help.

Anony, good to see you back. The more you reclaim of your life and your space, the more you will reclaim of your serenity, I'm sure of it! Hugs and hang in there!

Tillie, you give US inspiration to keep going too, I hope you know that!

Pain, yeah, I have the ol' ADHD too but I'm going to figure out some "workarounds." Keep posting your progress, it gives me ideas.

Kitty fur is a small price to pay for the delightsomeness of kitties. :)

Today I was out near it so I popped in at my storage unit. I thought if I could just do a few quick things. And I did. I found a few more bits of my Steampunk crafting stuff and consolidated them into the Steampunk tub which is in the van for now but hopefully will find a permanent place soon.

I also went through my doll clothes ribbons and lace and consolidated some of it that was in a separate place over to the main place. It will be easy to find and USE UP now. I had purged about 50% a year and a half or so ago, and I think what I have is not bad. Plus as I get the doll clothes made, if I have too many leftovers, they can get donated. I hope to get an Etsy to sell these craft things eventually.

I found two hanks of trim I didn't really like and those went to donation - again, that idea of not keeping stuff around that I'm unsure of. I know I won't miss those trims at all.

To wrap things up, I put some large art and sewing books in an upright crate which will keep them from getting bent - oh, and I got rid of one book too. And I found a book I'd been wanting to refer to for a project.

It all felt good, just those little things! And it gave me some ideas for future decluttering out there. It's always nice to know where I might start the next time.

Hi there, everyone?
Tillie, cat fuzz is a wonderful thing...ha ha...and your outlook, encouragement, determination & humor help keep me going, too!
CM, i totally agree, its the decisions that are the worst hurdle!!!
Pain, i am blown away at how much you are getting done and in such challenging circumstances!
Tatoulia, i thought of you as soon as i read about Mary's passing. Id decided to get her series on dvd after you saying how much she inspired you!
I had a dream where that good feeling id had when picking up little pieces of trash in my yard, was magnified when i left the situation with wanting my boyfriend back. It was a liberating feeling that was wonderful! I looked back at him & his young groupies and felt relieved! I know that fixing my place up will be good! Im also on a deeper spiritual path than ever, and i plan to deepen it....
~♡~Love and Healing to All!~♡~

Hi there, everyone?
Tillie, cat fuzz is a wonderful thing...ha ha...and your outlook, encouragement, determination & humor help keep me going, too!
CM, i totally agree, its the decisions that are the worst hurdle!!!
Pain, i am blown away at how much you are getting done and in such challenging circumstances!
Tatoulia, i thought of you as soon as i read about Mary's passing. Id decided to get her series on dvd after you saying how much she inspired you!
I had a dream where that good feeling id had when picking up little pieces of trash in my yard, was magnified when i left the situation with wanting my boyfriend back. It was a liberating feeling that was wonderful! I looked back at him & his young groupies and felt relieved! I know that fixing my place up will be good! Im also on a deeper spiritual path than ever, and i plan to deepen it....
~♡~Love and Healing to All!~♡~

Good Morning Everybody :)

Hi Tatoulia :)
Yes! You and the others here do inspire me every day.
The way you all work, the things you sort out, the struggles we all share.
Remember, I live in a massive hoard in a house that has some very serious issues/damage and a squalorous hoarder who refuses to change.
It would be easier for me to just lay down and give up.
But you all give me hope and a good reason to continue on.
Thank You! (((((HUGS)))))

Hi CriticalMass :)
WAY TO GO! for donating the lace and dye remover!
Sometimes the smallest things give us the most trouble making decisions on. ;)

Hi Pain :)
The way you handled the laundry is fantastic! :D
Start to finish until it's all done.
WAY TO GO! for all you have done and for selling the bike! :D
Wonderful plan to close down the kitchen until you have the dining room cleared out.
Allows you to concentrate on that and not back to kitchen cleaning up.

Snowing again, still.
Today planning to start working on making a summertime dress.
Have the fabric and pattern out.
First need to do the usual daily tasks and then vacuum because I layout the fabric & pattern on the floor and the floor is always fuzzy from the cats.
Everything is always fuzzy from the cats.

TTYS :)

Glad to hear from everyone.

Critical I do relate to projects that start but dont Finnish. My parts get separated.
If I were to describe my hoarding tendencies. I'm a stacker and restacker. My project to get bugged I to boxes and the boxes tip over and rarely get them all back together. I don't have a lot of drive to finish things to completion. Adhd style of getting g distracted and losing my place In A book . So I never throw away the books. If you Know what I mean.

I hate heart break. But it's the risk we have to endure to do get to that person we bond with.

Today is laundry day.
Nothing else come first.
The laundry, the whole laundry, nothing else buy the laundry until the lay dry is finished.
Otherwise it's never ever done.

There's been a pile of laundry that the wife and daughter won't purge. It's been a coin mountain. About 6 foot tall and feet a across. I took it all to laundry mat while they were out today.
I set up a clothes bar in the storage unit. Bought 50 plastic garment bags and hi g them there. Taking pictures and separated from wife and daughter.
Daughter was glad. Wife was as mad as I ever seen her. Not that I don't care. I just won't tolerate it keeping the house a giant mess . I also took 15 more tubs to storage. I'll need to get a larger storage unit. But at least I have the time and money to get it downsized . So the dining room is 50% clear now I'll need the bigger unit to clear the other rooms,but I'll get the downstairs done. With current capacity. I already sold my first sale item. My oldest bike for $20. I only pay $100 a month for storage unit. Hopefully it will pay for itself as I downsize. I get first month free of three months. I may try and get the same deal in three months for another unit. Will be April 1st.

Kitchen is OK today. Wife was mad and didn't kooc up the place. I'm taking her to dinner tomorrow evening. But the weekend will be all delivery. I'm closing the kitchen until we can eat in a clean dining room. I think that will be Sunday.

Hello again,

This will just be bits and pieces.

Pain, I thoroughly enjoyed reading your posts about your plans and how it's going carrying them out. It makes this decluttering business sound doable. Sorry your wife is not well, though. I can imagine how that must make you sad. But that was nice that she and your daughter shared a happy moment too.

Tatoulia, you are doing well, and even if I had a quick visual of an "underwear herd" trust me the amusement was priceless! ;) So don't feel embarrassed.

I haven't gotten large things done this week but the things I did get done I'm pleased about. One was getting a form submitted regarding my student loan debt. A routine thing but I tend to feel a bit uneasy anytime there's something with a deadline. It wasn't difficult really, and it's finished! Then I just wait to hear confirmation back from them.

The other thing I did was take a small bag to donate at the thrift shop. It just had a pair of jeans that are too short, and some craft lace that was white stained with a little red dye and the box of dye remover. Such a classic hoarder thing - most people would've just thrown out the stupid lace, it wasn't anything valuable. But no, I had to go buy the box of dye remover, then read the instructions which sounded scary, and procrastinate in indecision for at least 3 years thus far. The bag rode around in my van after my last move.

So when I put the jeans in the bag I was thinking to look for things to add, and I found that bag of lace and dye remover. I just bundled the whole thing up and stuck it in with the jeans! And today got rid of it. It may not sound like much but it's not bugging me anymore. If they want to throw it away, fine. It's the decision-making I hate most of all. Problem solved. I'm going to do more of this sort of thing - just getting rid of things that I am annoyed that I keep, if you see what I mean.

Anony, glad you checked in. I know you've probably heard it from others but I'm going to join the chorus anyway: Don't let some person who has treated you badly make you feel like your own life is washed up. It's grief and loss but it can be gotten through. If I could tell you what I did/endured back in the day yet somehow survived . . . and am glad I did, and though things are hard they're at least not stuck back in that old rut . . . anyway, grab onto hope and hold on tight. We'll be pulling for you.

Yeah, the 2017 celebrity deaths have started, it was only a matter of time. I remember watching Mary Tyler Moore Show in the 70s when I was pre-teen or teenage. Lots of laughter and good interactions between the characters.

Being a KC Royals fan, I was also shocked and saddened by the death of their pitcher Yordano Ventura this weekend. Another baseball player, Andy Marte, also died in the Dominican Republic in a separate car accident. And there have been others died recently Too much sad. Young men with promise but maybe reckless, I don't want to judge but it's too bad they didn't get a chance to mature out of it.

Tillie--I inspired you? Wow!!! Ok maybe inspired is a big word, but just let me savor this!

Turkey is delicious.

*everytime I watch her show