Hey Tillie, Mary,

I hope that you both feel better soon.

Mary I'm in Northwest Indiana.. :)
Yeah someone local!!

Hi Tillie and Mary,

I hope you guys feel better soon.

(((HUGS)))

Thanks Dianne,

All of the firefighters that were at the scene all complimented me and told me that I did a great job with helping the lady too. They also gave me lots of hugs and one of them even kissed me on the cheek when he told me that I did a great job helping the lady. :)

I am so glad to hear that your daughter and grandchildren were okay after your daughter was hit by the drunk driver. :)

Must be the full moon not feeling well here either. Computer sick too my Java won't work...
Here's to a new day....

Good morning everyone :)

I will write more later.
Been feeling sick since last night and need to take it easy this morning.
Nothing serious, just one of those things. ;)

Have a great day everybody.

Good morning all, I have been focused on living room and the dishes piled up a few days, this morning I got them done. I have never done daily maintenance, just wait until it is a disaster, so must keep practicing daily maintenance as well as uncluttering. Didn't sleep well last night, still plan to stay on track and start going through clothes. Take old paint to paint store, bags to thrift store, old tires out of car, fill car with gas, get haircut, go to bank. I am looking forward to leaving home, been staying home with decluttering, will be fun to leave, with a list of things to accomplish. Hope you all have a fun productive day.

Dianne, great to hear what you are doing, and your insights. Seems normal to have clutter when it creeps in, until you see a clean fresh rental, and how much better it feels, good description, I can almost visualize your beach place, and also want to remind you to be grateful for your homes, you are blessed, and now makeing both better. Sure would be nice to stay overnight at beach so you could do more at one time. Might be worth a try and see how daughter does without you for a day or two. I am very happy to read all that you write.

Thanks Dianne,
I have to think of myself only and my sister.
I can't do anything for my mother. She buys objects for hurt feelings. Her late sister who was taken by Overian Cancer in 2001 Feb 19, She gets things today for her saying "SHe would've liked that." And she buys it. I guess in her mind it's her way of feeling better if she buys things to replace hurt feelings.
It's the same with the loss of her mother in 2011. SHe wants photographs that her mother had had, because of issues with her siblings, she collects, the dining room table, cookie cutters, and a whole bunch of other stuff that she has more than enough of to replace the hurt feelings to feel more complete I guess.
Helen Buttiguigg says that "clutter is post poned decisions."
She is from the tv show "Neat" I love watching her. She always says "THere is always some grief before relief." WHen she is helping people deal with the clutter and help them change because they want to change. It's a Canadian show, but for me, it's a version of the tv show Hoarders which I can't watch because it's not available to me.
I'm so glad that I can offer online support to not only you but to any one else that wants help or just to relate to the feelings that are mutual with this problem. I greatly encourage anyone who has started to seek some kind of help. My mother will never change. She says that she knows what the problem is but will never admit that she is too terrified to get help or never admit that she needs help mentally. It's T-Storming all day and night by me and will delay computer issues all day and night.
Best wishes and keep up the good work. :)

Hi everybody! :D

Lynn,
The driver of the car that got hit will be okay. She just got a lot of bumps and bruises from the accident. The drunk driver was so drunk that I don't even think he was able to fully grasp the whole situation that was going on. He was a really calm drunk and he seemed really out of it the whole time everything was happening. He didn't even try to run; which kind of shocked me. I'm glad that he decided not to run though; because if he did decide to run, then he might not have gotten arrested.

Thanks diane. :)
After it was all over I just sat on the edge of the fire truck next to one of the firefighters and cried because the accident reminded me so much of the car accident that I was in when I was 19.

Tillie,
Ok I'll clean out my closet before I go to Hawaii. It's going to take forever to get my whole closet totally cleaned out. But I'll try to have it totally done before I go to Hawaii. :)

Thanks so much Tillie. It is new information for me, I have never lived like you described, I want that so much, love being able to relax, without stuff all over the place, although I can see piles in dining room, living room is now sanctuary, I plan to do what it takes to keep it this way, I love it!!!!!!! Tillie, you have made all the difference in my recovery with your daily support.

MayMay,

Here is what we want you to do before your trip to Hawaii...

Dig out that closet!

Sort, delete, organize.

Make it a real walk in closet.

Post here daily to tell us about your progress. :D


Happy the woman was alright & the drunk arrested.

Diane! :D

Your livingroom sounds like a wonderful place to sit and relax in.
You did a lot inside and still had time to get outdoors to enjoy the day! :D

Time to talk about the areas you have reclaimed.
These are now called

"NO CLUTTER ZONES"

We must defend these zones every day.
Do not allow that clutter to creep back in.
Enjoy these areas but when you get up take any cup, glass or plate into the kitchen.
Gather up any newspapers, magazines, books or whatever and put them neatly away where they belong.

A few minutes spent daily tidying will keep your home from falling back into clutter.

You have been doing FANTASTIC! :D

Take good care of yourself MayMay, it shocks your body to go through the trauma of watching a wreck. So wonderful you were able to stop and help at the scene.

Hi everyone,
so great reading all of your interesting posts. I started in living room and finished the area by the chair, it looks so nice. Actually hooked up DVR today. I worked until tired, at that moment a friend called, and we both enjoyed our chat. I realized the sun was out and no wind for a change, so I went out and watered plants, pulled weeds. Had a fantastic time outside, oh, mowed lawn too. I love my living room now, really want to maintain living room and avoid clutter. Now have to go through clothes at the end of the living room tomorrow. The big cabinet connecting living room and dining room will be next then start on the piles in dining room. I was worried I would feel empty with junk out of living room, but art and colors make it so cozy. Still have my favorite big basket with lid, and a few other things I love, just not all the little junk. Have lamps I like so looks really nice. It is really amazing that there are no junk piles. It will be fun to have the clothes out of here, then I will really be comfortable. Thank you all for your wisdom and especially Tillie for all of your daily support.

MayMay I hope that the driver that got hit is ok.
I am a professional rescuer and I never had an incident yet, thankfully. I've been certified now for over 17yrs and will recertify this July.
I'm glad the drunk driver was able to get arrested. Unusual that he hung around for the cops though. ?

OMG! I saw something very frightening happen today. :o

Today while I was walking Matt and Cory, I saw a car accident happen right in front of me. :o

A car got side swiped by an SUV.

Luckily both drivers were ok.

When I went to check on the driver of the car that got hit, I noticed that she was passed out; but then shortly after I talked to the "Onstar" lady from her car, she started to come to. I stayed with her until the paramedics and firefighters arrived. :)

The driver of the SUV that hit her was totally drunk.

As I was checking on the driver of the car that got hit, the driver of the SUV came stumbling out of his SUV holding a bottle of beer and smelling like alcohol. As I noticed him coming near the car that he hit, I asked him if he was hurt. After I asked him that, he asked me what happened; so I told him that he hit a lady's car while he was driving. And then I asked him how much he had to drink and told him to stand on the sidewalk next to Matt and Cory until the police and EMS arrive. Luckily he listened to me. :)

The paramedics and firefighters arrived before the police did. So after the paramedics took the lady to the hospital me, Matt, Cory, and the drunk driver all waited with the firefighters until the police arrived. :)

Then after the police arrived, the drunk driver was arrested.

Yes and Thanks Tillie,

I knew many years ago that something was wrong.
I was between the age of 10-13 when I knew something was wrong.


I'm betting that not too many kids stop asking/beg not to get any more stuffed animals for stuffed animals because they realize they have no room for new ones and don't feel comfortable with getting more stuff without getting rid of any old stuff.

My purging muscles are very strong but I can't let go of stuff due to my mother. She is the one that isn't willing to change or admit anything is wrong with her.

I admit too that I have some letting go issues too but am very willing to get help for that to help me see the light a little brighter.

Some stuff is alot easier to let go than others.
I understand that, but I need space and I need to be out on my own.

For the first time in my life I am an owner of my own car. No more car payments to pay either.. Yeah!!

I am the sole owner of my car. :) Yippee!!

I am very grateful that I found this web site and have someone to talk to with any issues that come up over this topic of cleaning and jumping over those mental blocks that hinder a better life.

My grandmother on my father's side was English and I strongly believe if not because of her my purging muscles may not be so strong and with the strong desire to get help and realize this type of living is not healthy and is a dangerous fire hazard.

My mother will never change but I do know that my future is bright with a high potential to live a clean and organized life and I can always ask for help.

No organizer will ever critize a person's place of living if asking for help to clean.
Their goal is to get to the root of the problem and help recover and stay neat and organized.

I'm also here to help support others on this site too.
Everybody needs some support somewhere down the line.

:)

HI Lynn :)

Good luck and best wishes on the job search.

I have always found that when I have a job I find leads to better jobs that I would rather have.
Social networking while out in the work place does pay off. :)

Many children of hoarders do break the hoarding/cluttering chain.

My young friend was able to learn how to keep his home clean and clutter free after growing up in squalor.

I am very confident you will too because you honestly want to. :D

Good afternoon,

I'm kind of venting today but also hoping I get some kind of job whether I like the type of cleaning or not.

I know my mother has a mental illness and denies she has a problem. As soon as I can get working and save up for a place of my own I will make sure that I don't end up keeping things that I don't need.
I know the rule if you haven't used it within a year, toss it.

It's hard to clean up with my stuff when she has to know that what ever objects/toys/items are going to be tossed she would have to know what they are because she bought them with her dollar.

When I was a kid I begged her not to buy me stuffed animals because I realized that once it comes into the house, nothing is coming out.

I didn't know the golden rule then which is:
One new object, one old thing out.

I am willing to ask for help before anything happens to be too cluttered. I would ask for advise and for someone to hold my hand in the purging process if necessary to keep my future place clutter free and functional.

Because me and my sister are twins, she wants to give the twin clothes only to "catholic families" with twins. She said Catholics because they would respect the clothes.

I said what does it matter what religion? Other religious families would have more respect than she does.

So far the place that I applied for today said that they are taking apps all week and will start interviews next week for a couple of weeks.

I'LL TAKE ANYTHING.
I'd personally prefer commercial cleaning,
but a job is a job. I need to earn something to save up and get out on my own. Hopefully I can get job security this time.

I hate maid cleaning!! but I'll take the earning a dollar any day than not earning one.


I'll offer any advise that I can offer and always words of encouragement to everyone.

Anyone and everyone who has started the cleaning process congrats to you!! I hope that you keep it up.
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.

You can do it!!

Good afternoon,

I'm kind of venting today but also hoping I get some kind of job whether I like the type of cleaning or not.

I know my mother has a mental illness and denies she has a problem. As soon as I can get working and save up for a place of my own I will make sure that I don't end up keeping things that I don't need.
I know the rule if you haven't used it within a year, toss it.

It's hard to clean up with my stuff when she has to know that what ever objects/toys/items are going to be tossed she would have to know what they are because she bought them with her dollar.

When I was a kid I begged her not to buy me stuffed animals because I realized that once it comes into the house, nothing is coming out.

I didn't know the golden rule then which is:
One new object, one old thing out.

I am willing to ask for help before anything happens to be too cluttered. I would ask for advise and for someone to hold my hand in the purging process if necessary to keep my future place clutter free and functional.

Because me and my sister are twins, she wants to give the twin clothes only to "catholic families" with twins. She said Catholics because they would respect the clothes.

I said what does it matter what religion? Other religious families would have more respect than she does.

So far the place that I applied for today said that they are taking apps all week and will start interviews next week for a couple of weeks.

I'LL TAKE ANYTHING.
I'd personally prefer commercial cleaning,
but a job is a job. I need to earn something to save up and get out on my own. Hopefully I can get job security this time.

I hate maid cleaning!! but I'll take the earning a dollar any day than not earning one.


I'll offer any advise that I can offer and always words of encouragement to everyone.

Anyone and everyone who has started the cleaning process congrats to you!! I hope that you keep it up.
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.

You can do it!!

Good morning :)

Fed cats their breakfast
Scooped litter boxes
Put down fresh water

Got a load of laundry out on the clothes line.
Going to make spaghetti sauce.
Clean the kitchen.

Saw my rocking lawn chair buried out in his hoard.
I have been looking for my chair for three years!
It won't be easy but I plan to climb up that mountain of stuff and dig out my chair today. :)

Today is cool & breezy but the snow clouds are all gone.

This afternoon I plan to watch a movie on Netflix. :)

The reason why we need to finish one room before moving on to another is...

Working in one area of a room then another area in another room and doing more in another area...

Well, at the end of the day you are tired and dirty after putting in all those hours working hard but look around and don't see anything finished.

You get discouraged. :(

When you work in one room, after putting in all that time you can see your progress.
See a job well done and finished.

This will give you satisfaction to see your accomplishment. :D

Seeing one room completely decluttered and cleaned would motivate you to do one more room.

Do not try to complete an entire room in one day.
Break it down into do-able sections so you don't get burned out.

:D

Hey diane,

My closet is the same way. It's jam packed full of stuff. My closet is supposed to be a walk-in closet. But right now I can barely walk into it because there is so much stuff inside it.

Thanks Tillie, yes drawers and closets are stuffed. It is much better in the living room, more comfortable, but the clothes are the ones I wear, not sure what to do next, guess take them to bedroom and take stuff out of closet to get rid of so I can fit them in. I have drawers filled to the brim, mostly sox, underwear, but more than I need. Enough sox for a small town. My closet is packed. You sure know what it is all about. Good to hear your husband has been able to let you help him change.
Cory said to finish one room at a time before moving stuff, so not sure of next move. I have 2 stacks of books and magazines on the other side of the room to go through in the morning. Next will be the clothes.

Way To Go! on tackeling those paper and stuff piles! :D

Laundry...
The laundry is not finished being done until it is put away where it belongs.

That may be very difficult if you can't reach the closet or dresser or if all the closets, drawers or shelves are already over filled with other stuff.

My hoarder never put away his laundry that I had just washed for him.
He said he had no place to put it except piled on his bed or tossed on the floor.
His tall chest of drawers was stuffed full of all sorts of other non clothing stuff and about 75 of his "special" T shirts that he never wore.
His closet was stuffed full of guitars, a banjo & mandolin.

It took a long time but I worked with him to get that straightened out.
Plus he donated a LOT of clothes that didn't fit, tossed things that were too worn out and found other places to keep all that other stuff. :D

We did it one item at a time...
Do you need this?
Does it fit? Try it on to be sure.
Do you like this?
Will you wear this regularly?
Is this item ready to toss out?

He is starting to get into the habit of putting his clean clothes away where they belong now. :D

Thanks Tillie for the encouraging words.
Today was hard, really hard to get rid of the bin of papers and junk on end of tables. Tomorrows project is worse, going through piles of clothes, at least they are clean, just never put away. I read in a book last night that you should put clothes away when out of dryer, I always have stacked them for later, doesn't make sense does it. I certainly would like to maintain my living room so I can quickly dust and vaccuum weekly instead of moving mounds of stuff to vacuum. Reading your statement, really hit me that it is possible to get organized and stay organized so cleaning is easy. Thanks Tillie for being here daily.

(((Hugs))) Diane :)

I am so happy to hear that you have broken the livingroom down into smaller more do-able task areas.
Once the clutter is gone, cleaning will be easy and fast for you too. :D

That really was a happy accident for you,
throwing out the keep magazine pile.
WTG! on decluttering magazines and saving all that time sorting out articles too. ;)

Remember to pace yourself. Take regular breaks and eat meals on time.
It is very important to take good care of ourselves when we are doing these physically and mentally challenging tasks.

Cory is always available to us on his email should we ever need him. I find that very comforting. :D

Hi Tillie and all---
Tillie you are so amazing, I am looking forward to the day I can do all that in one day, after piles are gone.
Cory was so right last night-so helpful-When I started on living room this morning, I started on one bin of papers etc. after 1&1/2 hours I realized he was correct, it will take more time than I thought. Yesterday I did big things, the small stuff takes so much time. So this week I made a plan of one area of living room a day to go through and file, burn or give away, or recycle. I now see that each area must be uncrapped, not just cleaning it and leaving all stuff. Yesterday I recycled a pile of magazines by accident, ones I planned to go through, it was a miracle, saved all the time I would have ripped out articles I would never read. Now I can throw out the pile I meant to throw out yesterday. Group was so great last night, sorry Cory won't be around muh now that he is so busy. I am comforted by the fact Tillie you are so consistent and knowledgeable and kind. Thanks so much.

Good morning ?
It is very dark, cold, windy and it's raining and snowing at the same time.
Not a nice day to play outside.
May as well do some weekly house cleaning.

Good news!
Last evening my hoarder filled the truck with a load of stuff to drop off at the thrift shop today. :D

My To-Dos...
Sweep floors
Clean bathroom
Wash floors
Vacuum carpet
Dust
Also do all the cat related tasks...
wash & fill bowls
scoop boxes
clean up vomit

Since I hang laundry out on a clothes line I will not be doing any wash today.

Hope you are having Spring at your homes. :)

So sorry we missed you Mary :(
Hope java gets straightened out and we'll see you there next time.

Tillie, sure sorry I missed everyone tonight. I had trouble accessing chat room. Kept telling me my Java needed to be download. no clue why never happened before. Hope to see you all Tuesday.

Hi everybody! :D

I just finished eating an early supper. Had buttermilk pancakes. ;) lol

He mowed the front grass and did the edging for me too.
I swept and raked up.
Then I got out the hose and sprayed off the walkway.
Looks real nice now. :D
Watered some stuff and the grass too.

By focusing all my efforts in this small garden area I am able to get it looking real nice.
Unfortunately, it is only about a 10th or 12th of the whole property. ;P

Makes such a wonderful contrast to the rest of the place and if someone is brave enough to walk all the way up and into the garden gate they are astonished.
When the now Sheriff was walking door to door asking people to vote for him he called my garden "a beautiful oasis." :D
Of course I voted for him. lol

Diane,
Just keep in mind that baby steps will get it done. (((hugs)))
Amazing how much can gather underneath the furniture isn't it?

Dianne,
You are doing fantastic! :D
And I have just the item to help you too.
I just need to figure out how to mail a Maine Coon. ;) lol JK

MayMay,
Don't buy any more clothes for the trip.
Wait till you see all the cute stuff in Hawaii you'll want.

Everybody has been doing GREAT! :D
Working for 5, 10 or 15 minutes does make an improvement and keeps us from burning out.

Hope to see you in chat tonight.

Hey Tillie,

Yesterday I bought some new shorts, 2 new pairs of sandals, some new shirts, 2 new swim suits, and I also went into the "t-shirt factory" and designed my own t-shirt. :)

The t-shirt that I designed is pink and on the front of it in blue it says, "Feel Safe at Night Sleep with a Paramedic." :)

hi Dianne and Tillie, enjoyed seeing your posts, good to see what you have planned. Today was my first time moving a couch to clean behind in in a few years, nothing alive back there, thank goodness. I really didn't realize how bad things had gotten. I think of myself as a "clean" messy, now I know that was faulty thinking. I realize it isn't about just cleaning, I have to get rid of junk that has prevented me from pulling that couch out to clean behind it. I am feeling overwhelmed after working a couple hours and seeing there is so much more to do. I appreciated reading 10 minutes then a break, then 10 minutes work etc. I go gangbusters then get worn out. Moderation is a word I will have to put in my vocabulary.

Good morning :)

Hoping he will mow the lawn today. It needs to be edged too but I am not able to do that.
Hope he will do that for me.

If he does this then I will sweep the walkway and porch.

MayMay, tell us what you bought for your trip.
My Granma would pack one suitcase with stuff to take to Hawaii and bring a second empty suitcase just for the stuff she would buy in Hawaii.

Found that cat that kept me up the other night.
Beautiful male Maine Coon. Not neutered.
He wanted in the house. I gave him food and lots of petting. He didn't cry any more. :)
Will check if anyone is missing him.

Just taking it slow and easy today.
Have some fun! :D

Remember chat tonight at 5:00pm PST.
Maybe Cory will be there? lol ;)

Thanks for the update Tillie, was wondering how you did, being tired today. Happy to hear you had a good day. I am so exhausted after the stud pulling, just laying around. I really appreciate you are so consistent.

HI Diane :D

Got my closet all clean and organized. :D
Then there were some dishes that needed washing but I didn't want to.
So I went outside and did some tree pruning and shaping and raking and just enjoying being outside.
Came back indoors and those dishes were still right there where I'd left them. :(
Said to myself "there aren't very many, I will do them tomorrow".

But I don't want to have a pile of dishes sitting there all night waiting for me and I do not want to wash them tomorrow.

So, I washed those dishes, wiped the counter and stove top. :D

I had a good day and hope that you did too. :)

hi, how did you do Tillie? Hope you had time to relax and enjoy today. hugs to you

WOW! Wonderful to hear from every one.

Very tired today. Did not get much sleep last night.
There was a cat crying outside somewhere nearby but I could not find it.
This kept my cats awake and fidgety inside.

Hoping I can do what I had planned to do.
In my very tiny room where I keep all my things is a very tiny "closet".
Not big enough for hanging my clothes so I installed 4 shelves to put things. No door so I hung a pretty curtain.

The plan is to remove the stuff from the closet, wash down the shelves and walls then put the stuff all back in. Thinking about re-organizing how I have the stuff arranged.
This is an easy task to accomplish but the finished results will pay off big. :D

Today I am going to the mall with some of my friends to go shopping for some new clothes for my trip to Hawaii next month. :)

Had some good rain yesterday, weeds are smiling!!Didn't sleep well last night so a bit out of sorts. Made a to do list must do things today that I don't want to do, involving money, tires, and floors. It is sunny now, will rain later so will enjoy yard. I already put systemic bug killer on aspens and another tree this morning.
Sounds like everyone is doing well on this message board, we are amazing