@ Dianne....the packages were the hardest too because I was putting small items in some of them that were requested or that she would have wanted someone to have. I still have to tackle the rest of the notes, but now that the packages are mailed...those should be much easier. Part of what made it so hard was her photo was on just about every paper that was going into the packages, so they were all over the place. But I'm still not quite "there" with the acceptance. It's still a shock, and so much to do (my parents couldn't handle it, and my mother had just finished chemo, so I was doing the funeral plans, and legal matters afterwards). At least now though (she passed last Oct), I am able to do the notes, and will be able to tackle the contents of her apt. (she was a long time hoarder) without getting too emotional.

For today's tasks/plans....I had to run a few errands and decided to take the time to see if I could fix an annoying ebrake alarm that was constantly going off. Success!! Felt so good about fixing the car, that I checked my list of things I needed to take with me tomorrow to visit my dad with my kids, and finished that as well. Time to relax now.

Hope everyone had a good day with their goals!

WAY TO GO! Susan :D
Sounds like you had a very good day.
Happy Mother's Day to you. :D

This morning was cleanup, laundry, dishes, grocery, then in the afternoon I had a rare hair appointment.

Why is it hard to justify taking care of ourselves, when we're so eager to take care of other creatures?

Dear husband showed me 5 videos that he suggested we give away, either to daughter coming for Mothers Day or to the library sale. Earlier I might have balked, wanting them for the 'collection' - of what? Things we already watched and won't watch again? So into the giveaway box they go.

Hope all are well and happy Mothers Day!

The morning was perfect, cool but not cold, warm but not hot, slight breeze.

He spent the time sitting in his filthy room playing games on his computer. :(
He has not been brushing his 2 cats enough and his room has lots of cat vomit everywhere due to the hair balls. :(

I had asked him about working out front of the house where he has some of his trucks parked.
Their tires are now flat and there are trees growing up through the engine compartments.
There is "stuff" tossed in the truck beds that the wasps find to be great places to build their nests. There is more "stuff" laying all around the area.

He said it is now too hot to work outside.
He is sitting in his floor to rafters hoarded garage now, playing computer games.

:(

Hi Roxie :D

How wonderful to have new appliances!
Get those counters cleared and the floor all clean so your kitchen will look beautiful again.

Nice thing about being in maintenance is that messes are easy to spot and don't take long to clean up.

Wishing you well and looking forward to hearing how it's been going for you. :)

Hi Roxie,

You're performing miracles. Take the day off and rest.

I think this is my first time posting in this area. Hi to all. I posted in the Success folder previously. I AM reading and I like "hearing" from all of you. I am post-cleanup and now working on recovery.

Setback for me is that having workers in post-cleanup to install appliances has messed things up and I find myself falling into old patterns. Put things down and leave them there rather than following the Only Handing It Once (OHIO) rule I was given. Having folks in and out has been exhausting for me.

I had to empty out my old useless dishwasher because it was just another storage place, in order for the new one to come in. Same with refrigerator. Now I have things spread out on the kitchen counter (which HAD been cleared) and the floor needs sweeping and mopping from all the tracking of things. Sigh.

I pushed myself to clean behind the dishwasher, stove and refrigerator (walls and floors) before new ones were installed. I exhausted myself. I need to get back to cleaning walls and ceiling. Push me, push me!

Wish me well, please, as I need recovery support.

Roxie

Dianne,
That is how people get in deeper & deeper by making do. Adjusting to things not working.
I had that same problem here with our septic system not functioning, he just got used to the stinky pond out in the side yard.

WTG! on having the stairs measured! :D
Looking forward to hearing how the air conditioning repair went for you.

When a repairman asks questions that have nothing to do with the job he is there to do you do not have to answer him. What he was doing was just being nosy and rude. (((hugs)))
I know how it feels though. I have been subjected to that kind of treatment too. :(

It's Saturday.
I am sitting here waiting to see what he will do today, if anything.

This has been a rough week for me. Going against everything I am used to doing every day.
Hoping this new plan will work soon and get him motivated.

Anyways....
I have a rule for myself that whenever I get something new I must get rid of something that I already have.
One in, one out.
Went through my stuff and have been successful in finding several things that I am willing to part with. :D
When someone has way too much stuff a good rule is "One in - five out, to help reduce the amount of stuff down to a reasonable amount.

My TO-DOs for today...
Cat stuff, food, water, litter boxes, brushing, petting, solving all their kitty problems.
Eat more of my watermelon.
Maybe get outside and pull some excess catnip mint and grass out of my garden.
Try talking to that hoarder in my life about things and areas around here that really need to be decluttered because it makes life here so much harder and dangerous that it need be.
Take my can of bug spray around and kill all wasps, black widow spiders and scorpions I can find all the while trying not to step on any snakes.

Wishing everyone a fun, happy and productive day! :D

Good morning :)
Karl, Diane, Pixgrls, Dianne & everybody else.

WAY TO GO! Karl on fixing the vacuum belt and getting to those other tasks.

Diane, wishing you a great time today. You deserve it after puppy sitting. :)

Pixgrls, Happy you have gotten to those long neglected obligations.
Looking forward to reading your plan when you write it.

Dianne, Baby steps and taking regular breaks is the way to go when doing the work all by yourself. :)

Actually, I did get one cleanup-related item done earlier in the day -- I fixed the vacuum cleaner. (The belt had come off, so the motor wasn't turning the brush thingy in front.) And, after my last post, I did indeed get the piles of magazines sorted; unfortunately, that's a small part of the whole. I'm running a couple loads of laundry before going to bed.

Thanks Tillie, I appreciate your kind support. Kari, how did the cleaning go? I know how frustrating it is when pressured, will feel good when you get it done. wish you well

Today -- nothing accomplished so far other than going out for some exercise and groceries. In particular, no progress on the mess that the landlords would like to be *completely* cleaned up by tomorrow. After I post this, I'll spend some time making progress on at least *one* front.

Diane,
Sounds like fun and relaxing spending time out tomorrow with a friend.
Sorry that darned puppy didn't just spread feathers on your carpet. ;)

Took care of neighbors puppie while he went golfing, I was worn out after a day with a puppy, watching what she was into, chewing shoes, cords, and anything else she could fit her mouth around, and she is not house trained, easier to clean up feathers Tillie. Instead of 1pm, neighbor didn't come back until after 3pm, so didn't go to class at 4pm, since I waited to shower til he got back. and it was 86 degrees so needed to shower.
Since it was so late, decided to skip class instead of rushing. It was fun having the puppy until she peed on carpet. I am trying to be more social and so thought this was a good thing, but I was disappointed the guy didn't come back when he said, and that I missed the class with friends, slightly annoyed. I feel frustrated that I got very little done today. I am out of groceries, but havent left home in days. Had planned on going to get groceries this morning before asked to puppy sit. I can say no, not until house trained if they ask me to puppy sit again. These are new neighbors so not close to them. Guess I will take tomorrow off to have fun with a friend, we talked about walking by a river, weather permitting.

WTG! Lynn on getting that MRI done! :D

Today I had the MRI done and will follow-up with doc on Monday to get the results. I'm able to get around with a cane and some walking without it but still hurts. My other knee is taking a toll with all the weight bearing stress and feeling the hurt from it. (Ouch!) Can't wait to start reading soon. Can't wait till I get better :)

Yesterday I had to water out in the yard because it had not rained enough here.

Last night at about 8:15pm we had a huge lightning storm and got buckets full of rain here. :D

My garden is full of blooming purple iris and sweet smelling little yellow roses.

Wish I wasn't so allergic to roses. Oh Well. :)

My To-Do list for today...
Cat stuff.

Think that my neglecting to maintain around here or do his laundry & dishes has started to confuse him. :D

TGIF!

WAY TO GO! Karl on scrubbing floors and getting them over for an estimate! :D

Looking forward to hearing more from you.

I got the kitchen and bathroom floors scrubbed last night and this afternoon; then the experts came over to give me a free evaluation. They judged it as being mostly clutter rather than serious hoarding -- level 2 at worst, maybe 1.5. Due to my financial situation I was thinking I'd have to forgo the actual service and see if I could bribe friends with pizza, but I'll see what the actual estimate turns out to be.

Thanks so much Tillie!! Happy you laughed when tickled by feathers!

LOL :D Diane!
Thanks for the laugh. :D

WAY TO GO! on all you did today.
Plus you didn't over do!
Broke things up enough to not get frustrated.

Have a lot of fun tomorrow baby sitting that puppy. :D


One of the hardest things I have been trying to teach the hoarder in my life is that there is no way he will ever be able to organize his hoard.
No matter how many pretty bins, boxes or other "organization" type containers he brings home. He just has TOO much stuff. :)

I started the day early again today, worked on clearing path into craft room. I have too many items in there for sure. Some of the pile was empty containers and hook things to hang junk on, thinking I was going to get organized, it is now clear, just too much stuff. After making a path to bookcase, was able to pick a stack of books to donate and a few things to throw away. When I felt I accomplished enough for today, I went out in yard and picked up all dog poop, and junk to put in garbage. was able to stuff alot of stuff in that old garbage can. visited with my neighbor, he just got a new puppy, Delila, very cute, and I get to take care of him tomorrow morning while neighbor is golfing. Hopefully no feathers to clean up!!

Well!
The neighbor's cats have a cat door that allows them to go outside into their nice fenced back yard.
One of the cats must have caught a bird because I just spent half an hour vacuuming up feathers that were spread all over the diningroom floor. :(
At least it was just feathers and no body parts.

Other than that, I have been having a wonderful day playing outside. :D

Good morning :)

Busy morning. It didn't rain enough here to water the trees and bushes very well so I am off to do that.
But first I have to feed my cats breakfast then feed my neighbor's cats their breakfast.

TTYL :)

WTG! Susan on finally getting to that pile! :D

Hi all,

Today's task was to sort through a pile of mixed papers and photos, take out the photos, and put at least one in an album. This is only possible because I had an album sorting project a couple weeks ago, and found some empty ones.

I got about halfway through the pile but did put several more older pics in the album. Need to put better labels on them, but that's for another day. Soon, though, because my kids have no idea who these ancestors are.

It wasn't a very big pile, I only did half of it, but it's been sitting there for a very long time waiting to be done. Step by step, it will happen.

Wishing all a happy and productive day!

Good morning :)

WTG! Diane :D
Great job on the craft room!
That daily maintenance like dishes & laundry & putting stuff away is very important to keep things from turning into a huge major clean up.
Two days worth of dishes to wash is so much easier than two years worth of dirty dishes. ;)

But daily maintenance here is what may be enabeling my hoarder to not do anything.
Since he has clean clothes and dishes, bathroom and main living areas always clean and company ready.

The house & cat sitting there is no cleaning for me to do either unless a cat should bring in a bird and spread feathers all over the place. That happened before. :(

My To-Dos for today...
Cat stuff, mine & neighbors
Wash my clothes
Wash mine & the cat's dishes
Let my house go to heck in a hand basket. lol

Weather report says scattered thunder storms. Hope we get some here. The rain has been all falling on Carson City and Reno and by the time the clouds get here they are all done raining.

Happy Wednesday! :D

Another beautiful day today. Today I will clean up the dishes from 2 days, clean counters and stove top. Clean stuff off the floor from sorting. Clean papers off table. At least 1/2 hour in craft room, can now at least get beyond the doorway. Hope to also clean a shelf in garage, which is a jungle, to put car stuff, paint and a few tools, all on deck now. I notice my mind is not as motivated or focused as it has been, lack of sleep partially, frustrated with pile up of papers and dishes. Changing habits seemed to be accomplished and now see clutter started to accumulate. I am celebrating not acquiring, this is a blessing, never would have dreamed I could go 6 weeks without bringing carloads of bargains home. Things are improving, just need to stay on top of piles that easily accumulate, papers and dishes for example. Finish filling garbage can, have it almost full of tossed out junk. I am also filling one huge black garbage bag with the lighter junk, I have a sticker to put on it for free pickup. Garbage company gives us a sticker for free pickup of one bag garbage, for a Christmas present every year. Just can't be over 20 pounds since has to be lifted by driver. Looking forward to reading what you gals are doing today. Any humor would be helpful.

Thanks Tillie, I like that you said :Spring is a magical time, I hadn't thought of it in those words, but they describe what I experienced today. It was so beautiful out, then big beautiful white fluffy clouds headed in from the west. Yesterday I forgot to quit before I got upset, and you are right I did not want to do it at all today, did paint some boards etc today. Your man can hire a housekeeper while you are working at the other house!!!!

Diane :)

So happy you took the day off along with me.
I know this is very difficult work you have been doing.
One thing Cory always says is to stop while you still have a positive attitude. Don't keep on working at a task till you are an emotional or physical wreck. Because then you will never want to start back at decluttering again.

Spring is such a magical season. All the foliage coming back to life is something we all need to get out and appreciate. :D

Tillie, it was fun reading about your yard, your weather is ahead of mine, still very little blooming in my yard, although I enjoy every bloom I see. It is so great you have a place to escape to this week. Today I had a vacation day with you. I worked outside all day, I know, must do inside stuff, but after yesterday, needed to have fun today. will rain tomorrow, and will be back at it, inside.

Good morning :)

How is everybody doing today?
This is funny, but I am having a hard time not doing some things around here and have to keep reminding myself not to do stuff. :D

Yes Diane, I can spend all the time I want at the big house, even the whole night.
But I would miss my 2 cats who sleep on each side of me and they would miss me too.

I washed my hair.
Still do all the cat related tasks.

Today I need to do a manicure. My nails are too long for my liking. :)

Still having scattered rain showers in the area. Wishing we would get more rain here, just been a few light sprinkles. :(

I have managed to start making the cleanest, tidiest hoard.
Starting slowly, will add to it daily.
Have put out some things but did not want them to get dirty or all covered with cat hair so I have the stuff in pretty pink plastic bags.

Some iris that someone gave me last Fall that I planted around my garden started blooming yesterday. Purple. :)
There are some wild yellow rose bushes that were here when I moved in that have started blooming too.
The bushes have very long branches covered with the worst thorns ever but the roses have the most wonderful scent! Smells like heaven out there. Unfortunately, it only blooms once a year and the blooms only last a day but there are hundreds of buds blooming day after day.

Today I am taking the time to stop and smell the roses. :D

Thanks Tillie,
It's hard to not to take anything to heart when you got a biting dog on your leg that never lets go to remind you of pain and misery everyday and be miserable. But true it is HER mental disorder, not mine.

You've been in my shoes in which I unfortunately still have to deal with. Sometimes I say or even ask her "did you ever wonder what life would be like if you ever thought positive thoughts for a while?" She either never had a response or gave a negative one to that.

But doc said to keep doing what I've been doing, stretch,flex, heat,ice, rest. Do what feels good.

At least when I think positive all the time I'm happy for the most part.
Hopefully when I can walk I will also volunteer at a hospital/clinic in which the volunteers don't wear "pink" jackets. I hate that color.


I've had an MRI before but wasn't quite so closed before. If I have to I will press the button to stop the test becasue of severe anxiety due to closed spaces. I may not be able to deal with it. I might be able to wear my night mask there to hinder my sight despite the loud noises the machine will be making.
I still hope I go in feet first rather than head first which will help. It's my right knee on the outside that I hit on sidewalk. I went in feet first when I broke my ankle before, after the two surgeries. (hardware in, then hardware out)

Tillie, my friend, you are so funny when you are on vacation!! Can you stay overnight at the palace? Might be nice to take a real vacation and stay there except to go home and take care of animals. What a great opportunity for you to relax in style. Thanks for all the support you give us. I had a tough day and feels good to know you care. I felt on edge and annoyed most of the day, didn't sleep enough last night. Did get stuff done, just felt distraught.

Today the toilet paper roll ran out.
I put on a new roll then placed the empty cardboard tube on the edge of the bath tub right beside the toilet.

Hey Lynn :)

I am happy you went to the doctor and are getting that MRI.

From what you have been describing, you really did a number on yourself & need more than time and rest to completely heal well.

The MRI attendants will be able to talk you through the procedure. They are real Pros at helping people overcome their fears and they are right there the whole time monitoring you.

Please don't allow her negativity to infect you. Remember that she is feeling miserable and wants everybody else to be miserable too because that makes her happy.
I really do understand. My mother was the most mean, nasty, negative, critical, abusive person I have ever met.
She decided at a very young age that she would be unhappy about everything, nothing could please her, ever. Except to make other people miserable.

You can decide to be happy and content in spite of her. Just don't take anything she says to heart. Repeat to yourself that you are a good, worthy and loving person.

Sincerely, Tillie (((hugs)))

Today I went to doc and schedueled an MRI for this week Fri and follow-up with doc the following Tues. Only bad thing is I'm very clausterphopic with the closed MIR. He said the only way my type of insurance would pay for an open is if I take the test and fail it.
STill such negativity from mom which doesn't help so I turn to here for positive words of any kind. I'm always seeking for positive attitude. My mom obvioulsy was raised with a very negative attitude towards life and accomplishments or anything that came her way.
I had a feeling I wasn't going to be happy with my mom taking me to doc but I didn't really have much choice due to the late time.
My sister should be able to take me to the other appointments because they are early in the morning. Mother is still defensive due to the "stuff" on the stairs which makes it hard for me to use. Any cheering up would help. Thanks.

Last night in chat it was decided that I would take this week off from cleaning.
Maybe my keeping the main areas of the house clean was in some ways enabeling my hoarder.

This works out well with the fact that today I also start baby sitting my friend's 3 cats and her big clean tidy house.
They have a hot tub, central air, a huge flat screen TV with satellite TV shows! :D

My plan is to go there before he gets home from work and watch TV with the cats until 9:00pm.
Maybe take a soak in the hot tub.

This way my hoarder can see what our home looks like when nobody is doing any of the daily tasks that are necessary to keep a house functional.
He will have no clean clothes to wear or clean dishes to eat from.

I hate doing this. I remember how I could not clean any more when he had totally filled the house with all his crap.
That made me so depressed that I gave up on life.

To make this experiment even more dramatic I am going to clutter up the areas with stuff.
The vacuum in front of the fridge, obstacles in the walkways. Counter piled high with cleaning products and all other stuff out and in his way from all the cupboards and cabinets.

I am planning to hang my clothes in the doorways. Put my shoes in the hall.
The chairs will all be piled high with the sheets and towels.

Wish me luck ;)

Dianne :)

WTG! for allowing workers in!
You have done GREAT by having the areas where they need to work cleared.
Sure, there is more decluttering to do but you know what all you have accomplished!
We are so proud of you and all you have done! :D

(((hugs)))

Diane :)

First things first BIG (((HUG))).

Now remember we are starting very slowly with the craft room.
You can stand in the doorway and just reach in and grab an item.
Decide keep, donate or toss. Put it in the right bin.
Breathe!
Walk away if you need to take a break.
Do something else.
When you have settled down enough to do one more item come back and repeat the process.

We do not want you to become overloaded with anxiety.
I want you to slowly get accustomed to the idea of working in this area.

You CAN do this!

Keep in mind how wonderful it is going to be to have your craft room all sorted, tidy and organized.
Think about all those wonderful fresh new craft projects you are going to be able to create in there. :D

(((HUGS)))

Great group last night, didn't sleep well knowing I had to do what I really didn't want to today. Got up at 6 and decided to get started. Took the bin from each room that wasn't finished and the two in front of the craft room. Put a pretty towel on living room floor and put stuff in piles of crafts, tools, gloves etc. Put things in garbage or give away black bags as I came to them. I started to feel overwhelmed so am taking a break. Stuff still on floor is bugging me, so will put it in proper areas. Now with empty bins can start making a move on the craft room hoard. One of the bins in front had mostly dirty clothes so will put them in washing machine. Friend just called and wants to come over to borrow saw. I didn't answer, don't want to be interrupted, now another thing I don't want to deal with. Guess I can put saw out and call her and say I am in the middle of pile and cant visit today. When I put off things I just feel worse, so need to call her. Do not want to deal with interruptions at all. Now I have to look for the saw, annoyed.

I didn't know about the fungus either. It is sad. How are you feeling about people coming in the house? I am still not there yet.