Tillie
I'm going to do some dwelling on this line of thought. I think it comes down to trust. And no matter how much I want to help. It falls flat on someone who doesn't want it. Now matter how I angle it.

Taught law

So hope you find hope and courage to know that love is stronger than all else.


I got a bit of push back on my thermostat spring challenge. Mother In law asked how much I hoped to save if I saved alot. I said $300 she wrote me a check. Lol I guess I may purge all that plastic and tape. But I'm sort a don't want too. But I don't need it . EeeeeK I wAnna keep it but I don't need it.

Hello everyone!

Tillie we are expecting a big snowstorm and meanwhile it's bitterly cold. I would love to see some daffodils.

Mom went back to rehab yesterday. She was taken there earlier in the week but went back to hospital for heart attack. That poor thing!

Cats are also slowly & steadily working things out.

I am trying to keep up with dishes and not much else. I am exhausted physically and mentally.

Keep up the good work everybody! So pleased for each of you!

Good Morning Everybody :)

Hi CriticalMass :)
WAY TO GO! for making a little space in that
"hot spot" clutter corner :D

Spent a lot of time outdoors yesterday.
Feel good about what all I got done out there.
Going back out again today.
I used to be able to do so much more in a day than I am able to do now.
So glad that "slow but steady" gets things done too. :D

Yesterday afternoon my daffodils started opening up!

Hi

Chilly and a bit of sleet here. Got errands run so now I can cocoon a bit. I went to feed my frog and decided to pull out some stuff around the chest of drawers where the terrarium sits. Found one bulky item to donate, made a little space. That's a bad "hot spot" clutter corner so any progress on it is great. More to come.

Pain, I have thought of some ideas like yours for the labeling of boxes in anticipation of when the helpers are available. My social worker was thinking too about clearing a path as one of our first priorities, and I am on board with that - it makes everything less hassle and also is safer for me with my not wanting to trip and injure myself after all that surgery. And I am a notorious klutz, so better safe than sorry! ;)

Not much else to say, but wanted to pop in. Everybody Don't forget to set your clocks FORWARD an hour tonight!

Good Morning Everyone :)

Hi CriticalMass :)
YEA!!!!!! :D
So very happy everything went so well (((HUGS)))

Hi Tatoulia :)
Hope you can get lots of rest this weekend (((HUGS)))

Hi Anonymoniker :)

Hi Pain :)
Finding someone who your wife is willing to work with is the best way to help her declutter.
I really wish there were someone here who would work with my hoarder because he refuses to work with me helping.
Others have tried to help him but he wouldn't work with them either.
He is just a crotchety old man, happy and content to live in squalor in a house that's falling down around him.


Going outside today.
Planning to cut down more small trees, rake some areas and generally spend time outdoors.
The winds the other day blew lots of crap all over all the areas I had already raked clean.

Critical Mass
I remember the feeling of feeling blessed when everyone came to help. It's motivating , and I kept trying to do as much of the pre work. So when they got there they could do alot things without me.
I was saying things like take everything with a red sticker and put in this place with the red sticker facing out. I had numbers on the stickers so when I photographed them I Knew where everything was. Even if the boxes were out of order. I have a tendency to be ocd. But the adhd is what I'm medicated for. So when I'm medicated I start showing signs of ocd. I eventually put all the tubs in numerical order even though I didn't need to.
My biggest problem is taking too much time unstacking and restacking . If I don't purge. Then shuffling it around doesn't diminish the hoard. I had to remind myself that if it was actually in my hands to make decisions about where it really finally needs to be.
Making a path for access. So when the volunteers got here they reached the priorities first off.

Not saying to do this . Cause I got no idea how you got it. But I'm sure you've got a plan. I was lucky to afford a bunch of tubs that fit eachother.
So making a wall of tubs . Photographing what's inside each one . Telling helpers put all tubs with a color sticker here and other colors there.
Made it easier for me. I think it was easier because I had a cart that I could easily stack eighth tubs on . So that I could roll empty tubs back and forth along the path. And fill fhe tubs with yellow stickers. And those yellow stickers had a place to go to. After I filled them.

Thing is I got so many filled and photographed before they got there . I was on a roll.
I wish you all the luck.

Up early , slept too much already.
So I'm at the rolltop desk with hopes that I can Finnish off the scanning that I plan to through out after after uploading. It's weird how the closer I get to completing something it's seems easier to get distracted. Oh well, on to the task. No more shuffling it around in the same box. Scan scan scan.
It will only two tubs . I don't plan to throw those away. So I'll scan them later when there's nothing to do. However I'll scan all photos . I've been working with just taking pictures of pictures.
But currently my scanner is doing a great job with making them look as good if not better than the original. And seeing all the old pictures on the big screen TVs. Quality is important.

Only caught three mice yesterday. So I got hope that that part of the nightmare is resolving.
I hate them. I want to kill them all. I will kill them all if I can. I hate them.

Congratulations CM! Glad you and your SW are a good fit!!! Sending you warm wishes and much love.

Everything went great this afternoon!

The social worker has a real knack for honing in on a quick and doable task. Even for this ADD squirrel, LOL! She got me focused and I was running with it like a boss. :)

We got several cardboard boxes gone, their contents condensed into some plastic tubs so they'll be easily moveable at the next stage of the game. Tossed remains of a small broken patio table that I was going to get rid of but needed that little push on.

After she left I went back and got another couple of cardboard boxes gone and a few papers gone through. Weather was turning chilly by then; weekend is supposed to be chill and rainy. Yuck.

But we are going to meet again on Thursday and do another round!

And she may know how to obtain some volunteer minions! Right now we just keep paring down, which will make it easier if and when the minions are available.

I feel blessed!

Hi everyone. Cm how did it go today? Thinking of you.

Hello Tillie, Anony, Pain & others.

Long day at work then saw mom at hospital and now dealing with cats.

I'm tired. Will climb in early.

I want to go outside and do yard work, but it's still too early to do anything worthwhile.

I'm running out of big accomplishments to plan. Fifteen days of spring cleaning ahead.
Ceiling fan
Vacuuming the furniture.
Vacuuming the registers.
Vacuuming the cars.


I think possibly maybe I'll clear out the kitchen to storage, the long-term unit. And bring back the stuff my wife wants most . But keep it in the cupboards. Her area is adjacent to kitchen. So it'll give her some stuff back near her.

I don't think it'll have much impact on tub total.
But just being a bit more ready to move .
Storage unit is 4 minutes from the house. So putting stuff there won't be time consuming...

My plan is when I need to move, and I need space. I'll combine tubs again so they ate filled, and after the move out them back to single layer.

I might ask my wife if there's anything she wants her mom or other people to have before or after the move and see if any of it goes. Or at least initiate a helper I'm not aware of yet. At this point the person with the most to purge is my wife.
And I've gotten as far as I can push. Perhaps someone else can help her let go of some stuff.

I just need to quit procrastinating and Finnish the scanning. While it's cold outside. I hope the shower my brother in law started gets started soon.
If the landlord comes for another Inspection it's be a rock and hard place with no wiggle room.

Well, the new day dawned and I'm not nervous about my meeting with the social worker. We'll just be at the storage unit today, but I took a few photos of my room here at my friend's house so she could see. I should probably snap some of my desk area and sewing stuff too. That's important when I have a little stash here and a little stash there, to keep in mind it all has to be accounted for in the planning.

Tillie, yesterday I was kind of aimless so I went outside to the garden area and dealt with volunteer trees too. Got out my loppers and bagged up several batches of sticks. Also did some weeding. My roomie was happy with that and I just needed to do something mindless yet purposeful, y'know?

So, I'd better start getting ready to go across town. I'll be back later with a report on how it went. I know it could be really happy, maybe a little mind blowing - hopefully not crushingly discouraging or anything like that. But whatever it is, I know you guys and gals will have my back! :)

Good Evening Everybody :)

Hi CriticalMass :)
You CAN do this!
We are all with you in spirit. :D
(((((HUGS)))))

Hi Tatoulia :)

hi Joan :)

Hi Anonymoniker :)

Hi Pain :)
We have a contest here to see who gives in first when Winter comes and turns on a heater.
I like the electric radiators best for safety and the cats love them, always cuddled up next to them.
Here we never know when Spring and warm weather will come to stay.
I have even seen it snow on the 4th of July.
Originally this house was heated with a wood burning cook stove when it was built over 100 years ago.
Now days I just use electric radiators and Edenpur space heaters since the wood burning cook stove has long since been removed.

Well, I managed to bring down one tree and cut it into sections and removed it to the side yard.
My new pruning saw is extremely sharp. Doesn't take much work to cut through 8 to 10 inch thick trees. :D
He saw my new saw and what I had been doing with it.
So far, so good. No nasty confrontation. ;/

Today is Thursday laundry day.
Nothing else can be done till the laundry is all done. It's the time of year that turn off the furnace and switch to space heaters and either cooking or using the laundry dryer to heat up areas .
So I've put black plastics on some of the windows. I have huge pile of blankets in the living room..
It's something my day always did on the 10th of March . So we I've always did it too. Tomorrow will be too cold ,but I started on The 9th because it was 60 today. It's just a 15 day effort to keep the gas bill low not an all winter thing. I we also try this in November 15th till December 1st. The bill hasn't been bad this year. But still there's another purpose. It's when we rearrange closets , from heavy clothes to spring and summer clothes when on The 25th of March.

I'm very careful about using space heaters . .
I've been buying one infra red heater a year since they came out . So since mother in law is staying with us. I've now bought my fourth one. I feel much better about the safer heaters since a neighbor a street over died using heaters . It was tragic.
Doesn't seem worth the little bit of money to be saved vs losing their lives. So I'm just saying I take the space heaters safety seriously. My wife has no objections this year so it's on.

Some tricks we use is to stay out after daughter leaves school. Go see a movie, or spend time somewhere where the public heat is free. And then go home take warm baths and get under covers. Drink lots of coffee and tea.
It was also when my childhood family would do spring cleaning in the house. Then after that we would all converge on the family boat. And clean the crap out it till is was sterilized,oiled,waxed and in ship shape.
I lost the boat , a few years ago . I couldn't afford the fees I accumulated and donated it to the facility. It's a big hole in my life. But after my passes. I intend to get another one. And someday retire and live on boat after my daughter graduates from high school or College. It's my dream to sail from Alaska in summer to Hawaii in winter . I've been planning on it my whole life. But family first. I have enough to pay for my daughters education , but not much else. So I have four years to save up . I'll be 56 when she graduates college.
I'll not keep working till I'm 68 in a job of little pay unless it's something I live to do.

I'm more likely to rent the boat out as a vacation boat . Rather than become a lonely recluse.
Well that's my plans , not sure what god has in store for me .
Last of the laundry is done and we're all in the living room watching the voice for DVR.

BEST WISHES EVERYONE

Hi everyone.

CM, I don't know if this helps you, but I use a chi machine to strengthen my core. You can google it. It is important to use a comfortable one. Mine has a base for the ankles covered in lamb's wool. They are kind of expensive, so I don't know how you would pay for it, but they are very safe and effective.

Because of my medical issues, including a repetitive movement disorder that was extremely disabling for years and years, I do have a very sedentary life. The movement disorder has vastly improved with the edgy medical therapies I have pursued for many years. Still, something like going outside and walking regularly is beyond my present capabilities. So my little chi machine works very well for me.

Best of luck.

Sendung you warm thoughts and best wishes, CM. remember to take deep breaths.

Hi,

I'm kind of nervous now about the meeting with the social worker tomorrow. Last minute jitters I suppose. Took photos of my bedroom so I could show her, and that made me see how bad it's gotten over the winter. I'm hoping that area of my life will be somewhat self resolving as spring comes. Should have more options and more energy - like taking stuff outdoors to deal with it, or something.

I'm also struggling with the whole exercise thing. If I had money I'd hire a sports medicine educated personal trainer. My doctor wants me to do core exercises and I definitely want to. But after the failed hernia repairs of the past, and the recent one being a different procedure - more promising but a one shot deal, can't ever be redone - I simply feel intimidated, almost terrified, trying to decide by myself exactly what exercises are safe and most beneficial to do, how many, how to start, and so on.

Going to see my regular physician on Monday, so I think I'll mention to her my concerns, have her check the surgical site too, and maybe she knows some resources for me. Once when I had tendonitis in my hand that clinic had a sports medicine doctor take a look at it.

My other anxiety is more connected with my hoarding issues: organizing to go to the gym. This is nothing new for me. I'm so forgetful and I haven't been in such a long time, I've lost track of my routine, what to pack, etc. And finding the items amid my clutter. Ack!

I realize how silly it may sound, but I fear doing something really dumb like forgetting to pack clean clothes, and getting out of the shower there at the gym and realizing too late. Occurrences like that are big upsetting things for me, always have been. Based on past stupid incidents and just knowing how my brain is weirdly wired. And I suppose fearing others seeing me in an awkward and embarrassing situation.

Despite all this angst, I know once I get back in the swing of it and hopefully have a game plan and my anxieties addressed, I'll enjoy and look forward to my gym visits. I have in the past. It's just more complicated getting to that point for me than it is for most people. Sigh.

Good Morning :)

Hi Pain :)
WOW! You have accomplished so much on so many different fronts!
You are truly an inspiration (((HUGS)))


Hi Tatoulia :)
I do believe what your cat is doing is establishing your bedroom as her personal private domain. The one place in the house that is her's exclusively, where Mom's cat is not welcome.
WTG! for getting that carpet cleaner! :D
Sounds like something you will enjoy for many years.
(((HUGS)))

Hi CriticalMass :)
Sounds like you are getting things done.
Way To Go! for bunny maintenance and especially for doing that hard student loan paperwork. (((HUGS)))
Fingers still crossed that Friday the weather is good and everything works out.


Going in to town today.
Really need to get out and away for a while.
Also could do with some fresh fruit and veg.
Tomorrow and this weekend planning to do a LOT of work outside around here.
The best way I know to get over an angry is to do physical labor and work it off.

Hello--glad to read your posts and your progress. Cats are trying to work it out. I just wish I could switch them so that my cat had the run of the house and mom's cat was in my bedroom. Mom's cat is still hissing at my cat but they are working on it. Oddly enough, despite ample litter.boxes, they are sharing one. So that must be a good sign. Anony the cat expert you mentioned was on one of the late night shows but alas I fell asleep. CM I am so glad that the social worker is coming and that she can get paid! Win/win! Pain, I love intermittent fasting. I've never done more than 5:2, meaning two days of fasting. Within a short time I didn't even notice my fast days. To have kept it up all these years is impressive!

Tillie, I hope all went well with getting the power tool. I just bought a bissell carpet cleaner and used it on rug in den/library and i am so happy with it! Cannot wait to use on bedroom carpet/ cannot do so while my cat is stuck in there. I hesitated about buying it because now I have to store it but honestly I cannot believe how well it worked! Amazing!

Today was supposed to be a fasting day for me.
I'm 230 lbs down from 340 five years ago.
I fast 3 times a week . I go on intermittent fasting where one day I eat normally then the next I eat only 600 calories .
I'll give the whole story , but I promise not to bring it up again.
After a car accident, I couldn't walk, after my injuries healed , was still in bed. Insufficient rehab. I watched a video about fasting and a companion video about minimum exercise.

After 5 years the weight has slowly come off, I exercise a much more than would. I fast on Monday
Again on Wednesday, again on Friday.

If I miss a day it's no big deal. If I binge about 4 times a year it's no big deal. Especially if I can fast the next day. This method is something that works for me. I lose weight. I have energy. Exercise, and eat foods that give an additional health benefit or nutritional synergy .

Over the years I've added many filters, most of the foods are cancer fighters, immune boosters, low glycemic, nutrition dense, low in animal fats.

Basically if you'll forgive for going on .

Monday. 600 calories of nuts and berries.
Tuesday protein shake/salad/fish dinner
Wednesday. 600 calories of nuts and berries.
Thursday protein shake/salad/fish dinner
Friday. 600 calories of nuts and berries.

Saturday's protein shake/salad/rotisserie chicken
Sunday's. Protein shake/salad/steak dinner.

It's 15 meals instead 21 a week.
I sleep alot on the fasting days , and exercise alot on the feed days . I walk an insane amount of steps due to my job. I feel very healthy and really don't know how to improve the menu.
. I used to struggle until I put the protein shakes in place and now I'm very consistently losing .75 lb a week.
So it's not geared to lose weight weight fast. It's geared to be as healthy as possible, and lose weight slowly.


...........
After my unplanned workout today. I met with my mom and wife. I've been planning something for long long time when the time was right. Today the planets aligned. Slowly the eclipse moved I to place they never saw it coming.
Earlier I mentioned to my daughter on the way to the restaurant, maybe you could grandma to borrow or have a garage sale. For tickets.

Then I sat and waited. Grandma said she was going to have a garage sale after my daughter brought it up.
Please understand that all most all of my daughter storage stuff is from her grandma , not my mother in law.
In the car I told my daughter whatever she can't sell at the garage sale. I buy for $10 a tub and donate. My daughter was so happy. I know my mom will not let that stuff go. But it will be hers to keep and store. My daughter confessed to me she really has outgrown all of it. So if she can money for it she really wants that.

So to keep score. My hoard is now down to 25 tubs . And I can condense any further. My daughter is now moving towards minimalist. Wanting friends to play Instruments with instead of the hoarder persona. I estimate she'll have 5 tubs after its all condensed. Only leaving my wife's hoard. That cannot fit in her own personal space. But I'm aiming for it to fit into a small storage bin and she can afford to pay for it now that she's on disability. But it's already paid up through til October 1st.
So I am just ecstatic.
I've reclaimed all my living space.
I've lost over 100lbs
I've condensed my hoard to a small wall of tubs.
My daughter is cleaning up her act.
My wife's things are being managed.
I have a maid come, and family help keep everything else cleared and clean . I'm having social gatherings in the home again.
On the mental side I'm sticking to the dosages and my mother in law has been asked to monitor my wife and I meds. I don't feel like myself, but I'm not hard to live with right now during this difficult time. My easiest trigger to trip over has been the hoard and mostly the neglect of the living spaces.
This little group of self help has been invaluable to me. Somewhere to come get it off my chest without being misconstrued,and spun into a mountain of mistrust. Again I thank you all.

This isn't how I thought this day would end , but it's turned to be great day. Except for yelling at some old people at the restaurant, for butting into our business at the register. But I didn't threaten them or anything like that just told them to mind their own business in a very voicestrous way.

I think I need a therapist to help me with my social ques as I adjust to meds.

Not much going on here.
Since everything has been done. In regards to routine. I'm reorganizing the crafts supplies.
Just something to keep me busy. And scanning more.stuff. I got it down to only four boxes left.
So I started a new end game strategy. Rapid sorting. Not scanning anything. But putting into a box pictures and papers I want to keep forever and stuff. I can toss after uploading to the cloud.
Hopefully I can complete all scanning by April 1st.
No foolin!

A while back I spent $100 on Foam core cutters.
It's my pride and joy. It's what I use when going from paper print to model homes. But it's also very useful for creating customized shelving.
I used to make customized shelving, but I would spend days obsessed with getting something perfect. Only to realize there was something in the hoard I've forgotten about. My response was to start making storage boxes with foam core dividers. This is awesomeness. This way anything I organize in a closet becomes portable. So for instance , the craft closet isn't just stuff on a shelf. It's little carriers I can take from the closet to anywhere .

I have so much little stuff that fits into many shoe boxes it's like having 100 junk drawfs.
So many mice made so much mess it's depressing that I'll be cleaning out mice mess for some time.
But I have a method - dump it all out.
I have a vaccine that is so small it perfect for eliminating the major mess , so I can get to handling the individual stuff quickly. Instead wiping out the shoe boxes I wait till I have about ten and then was them in the bath tub with the hand sprayer. It's so much better than just using hand towelette s. With bleach cleansers. I use those to dry them out. That way my stuff is recovered.

My daughter is glad I've brought back home the crafting supplies. I know it will be a source for triggering me emotionally if it's a big mess and no clean up . But I plan to approach the crafting supplies like I do the kitchen. I expect it to be a mess. I'll prompt her to pick up twice then do it myself. But give a consequence instead of a punishment.
My point of view is crafts supplies are very similar to tools. When it's organized you can be quick and on the spot. But when it's disorganized you can spend day putting off steps waiting for tools to found or going to the store to buy doubles. I'm hoping to expose my daughter to the benefits of organization. And keep myself in check about allowing a little mess. But alot of mess is unacceptable.

Snap , the sound of another mouse meeting his end.
I keep poison bait on the outside of the house and in the basement.
Every room of the house has at least four traps in them.
Everywhere we eat food has glue traps so it's not messy or contaminating.
It's a pain , but it's got to be done.

I'm having a pain free day so I'm going to the gym I go to.

The week is beginning to gel - some of them just take till halfway through!

I got some of my procrastinated things done. On Monday I was just dragging my heels like a stubborn mule. Part of that was tiredness, I think. Took a nap that day. Yesterday a little better - got the bunny litterboxes emptied into the compost and new litter in. The playpen still needs going over.

Later in the afternoon, I tackled the followup letter to the student loan place. I am one who loathes paperwork especially when I have to keep redoing it. However, I do horribly with phone calls due to my ADD auditory processing problem, so I'll take the dang paperwork any day over having to make a phone call! Hopefully I got all my I's dotted and T's crossed for them. Just got the documents mailed at the post office today.

It's still windy here; people in parts of the state have lost homes to the wildfires. I think this may be the last day of wind. Friday when I meet with the social worker at my storage I hope it's calmer, so papers and things don't blow about. Thunderstorms are predicted but hopefully not till evening on Friday. I remember that 2 years ago when I was moving, one of the things that made a bigger mess of the storage unit was bad weather. One night in particular it was just pouring rain and lightning - I was scared, we were out by the metal buildings! And so much rain getting on my stuff up near the door. Yuck.

I'd like to do some yardwork later, possibly, if I get some computer and other things done. I'd like to make some progress on my quilt. I need to go to the grocery store but I don't fancy it when I have to be so penny pinching. I'm regrouping still and aware that I mustn't procrastinate on the gym trips too long either. I get my YMCA membership at a deep discount because I'm low income, and I enjoy going. It's just that the driving there, the gasoline and the planning, has been an obstacle during the months where unexpected expenses came up. Or other complications which are kind of personal so I'd rather not go into those.

I think I'll be able to establish a pattern of regular gym attendance soon, though. Make a slow start and then increase. Crunch the financial numbers and then just bite the bullet and trust it'll all work out. I may be worrying too much. I get that way.

One crazy day at a time, I guess . . .

Good Morning Everyone :)

Hi CriticalMass :)
My fingers are still crossed that your relatives come through this unscathed.
Anxiously looking forward to your Friday meeting and hoping it all works out wonderfully for you.
(((hugs)))

Hi Pain :)
That's great that you haven't yelled at anyone in such a long time.
I know it's difficult not to (((hugs)))
Hope that darn headache has gone away.
Way To Go! for keeping up with the home maintenance and it's wonderful that you are spending time making model home projects :D

Hi Tatoulia :)
Happy to hear you have gotten some good sleep.
Please try not to worry yourself sick worrying about your Mom. ((((HUGS))))
Her cat will do so much better at your home rather than all alone at Mom's and I think the two cats will work out their problems. ;)

Hi Anonymoniker :)
Wonderful to read you are feeling much better now! (((hugs)))
Yes, the saw will cause problems when he finds out.
But there comes a time when I must stand up for myself.
I choose my battles carefully and won't back down.
He can not always have everything his own way especially when his way is to ignore everything until there is a major crisis, and then still not fix the problem.

Beautiful sunny and much warmer day!!!
I am about to go hang laundry on my newly fixed and restrung clothesline.
;D

~Good Morning all & happy Women's Day!~
Tillie, im hoping getting that saw wont cause any problems with your hoarder. That worries me from problems its caused in the past. ~♡~
Tatoulia, im glad you got some good rest & i hope your Mom feels better soon. I had miraculous results with Jackson Galaxy's(hes a cat behaviorist) suggestion with cats to get along & that is to make their experience when together good. Feed them near each other, praise them when together, etc. It may help?
Pain, you are like Superman! The way you handle things is a true gift! Your family should worship you!
CM, it might be more affordable & fun, instead of joining a gym, to take up bike riding or even doing yoga or arm weights in the sunshine or to music? Ive found making it fun helps me want to do it more than if its a chore?!
Im feeling much better than i did. Im reading a most amazing book on prayer & healing! ~♡~

~Good Morning all & happy Women's Day!~
Tillie, im hoping getting that saw wont cause any problems with your hoarder. That worries me from problems its caused in the past. ~♡~
Tatoulia, im glad you got some good rest & i hope your Mom feels better soon. I had miraculous results with Jackson Galaxy's(hes a cat behaviorist) suggestion with cats to get along & that is to make their experience when together good. Feed them near each other, praise them when together, etc. It may help?
Pain, you are like Superman! The way you handle things is a true gift! Your family should worship you!
CM, it might be more affordable & fun, instead of joining a gym, to take up bike riding or even doing yoga or arm weights in the sunshine or to music? Ive found making it fun helps me want to do it more than if its a chore?!
Im feeling much better than i did. Im reading a most amazing book on prayer & healing! ~♡~

Hello, forgive me for not contributing.

Finally had peaceful sleep tonight/nice long nap. Mom moved to rehab fir the hip. I know this is so hard on her. She's no longer a walking distance so I will only be able to see her during day and/or when BF can take me. I don't like driving at night.

I picked up mom's cat today and just brought her here. The two cats will have to work this out. Mom's cat hisses st my perfect little feline. My cat is much better regarding other cats. But they will work it out, I am sure. I had planned to keep mom's cat in my room and let my cat have the run of the house but so far my cat is cowering under the bed and the other cat is exploring the house.

Going to shower and go to bed.

Goodnight everyone. Keep working toward your goals!!

I hated excluding family members .
I think it's cause I was used to the abuse.
When they started the abuse on my wife and daughter. I had to just stop talking to them.
When they need help . I help them.

But I had to stop letting them mock me a say that everything I've done is shit.
It difficult enough to have a mood disorder. But when family wants to blame you for everything and vocalize their every annoyance. I had to let them be. Not call them , not answer them.

Then with my wife , she's more outgoing. I mean to say she meets with friends outside the home.
Where I invite people to my home.
So many many many years have gone by. I stopped having friends. Stopped talking to family . Let the clutter accumulate around me. And listen to them criticize.
Until my wife be are ill . I just gave in to her moods.
Once she was unable to care for herself. I finally stopped letting her Control my moods. I did things my way.
I'm slowing remembering who I used to be.
Nothing scary or dramatic.

I love those people, but I got to feel what feel, without others telling me my emotions aren't correct. If they hurt me unintentionally. I can forgive them. But if they hurting me just so I will listen. I'm not doing it anymore.


Today I cleaned out the cars.
Put yard wastes in the bin.
Mopped the moppable floors.
Killed 6 mice.
Cleaned the areas where they got it.
Took a long bath , read some verses.

Listened to my daughter go on and on about her grandma's.

Filled the hungry bellies. Cleaned the dishes.
Set out more traps.
Took the last of the antibiotics.
I have a headache that won't quit. But instead of getting under the covers and withdraw. I want to hi and wish you all the very best.

I kind of miss the drama and attention of having g a hoard in the house and tackling it to honest.
But the dinners, the baths , the man cave, and the Teenage's laughing and banging on instruments. Actually working on my model house projects . So much better than seeking negative attention.

I haven't yelled at anyone in four weeks.
I'm asking them only twice to do something. Then I do it myself. Instead of yelling or griping about it.

It's hard sometimes , to realize I need to be on medication when I don't want to be. But the differences are stark.

Quick drive by -

Not only meeting the social worker Friday but since she is at the same place where I see my doctor, it's covered by my insurance and she'll get paid. I'm glad - it's nice of her to reach out to me as she has and she deserves some compensation for her time.

My relatives seem to be okay, as far as I can tell from Facebook - no news is good news I guess.

Good Morning :)

Hi CriticalMass :)
My fingers are still all crossed that Friday you finally get an answer to finalize your plan and all works out wonderfully! :D
Dangerous weather conditions in many places and I always hope that all the people manage to stay safe. (((HUGS)))

Hi Tatoulia :)
Hoping to hear you have taken a turn for the better
(((HUGS)))

Hi Anonymoniker :)
Hi Pain :)

Contemplating driving into town today to purchase a pruning saw.
I think the trees threatening the power line drop to the house are small enough that I can cut them down with that.
He has power tools that he won't let me use or use them himself to do this job.
It may take me a few days of working at it to finally get them down.
But at least it's a plan to get it done.
He told me before that 35.00 for a good pruning saw is out of the question and I am not allowed to make that purchase.
All the while he spends more than that amount every weekend adding to his massive pile of unneeded miscellaneous stuff from thrift shops.
Plus a good pruning saw would be very useful around here for many years to come.
I have a 10.00 dollar off coupon from the hardware store.
OK, I will go get the saw and let the chips fall where they may.
"evil grin".

TTFN :)

Update -

I did hear from the social worker - she must've checked her voicemail. We're going to meet at my storage on Friday!

It's been a weird day here in Ks. with those aforementioned dangerous winds having starting wildfires; my cousin's apartment complex is being evacuated. I'm praying everybody will be safe incl. the first responders.

Hi Everyone,

It's kind of a Monday, no? All of us a bit in the doldrums. But it's okay. This too shall pass. I'm sad for those who have had to endure violence or abuse especially growing up. From what I understand this is common in the background of those of us who struggle with hoarding. My own situation as a kid wasn't extreme but it was sometimes messy or too much drama. Even that can be stressful. I think my folks and I were just intense people.

As I've gotten older and dealt with my own baggage or quirks I feel empathy and forgiveness for them, though. It helped, for instance, being diagnosed with ADD, or going through menopause. I can now see how the people in my family were made irritable by their own health problems and temperament issues, and their past traumatic life events such as family members' deaths, natural disasters etc. When we've suffered too many losses and feel depleted, we can be prone to lashing out, because to be even-tempered requires energy.

Again, we do have hope - in each other and in each bit of wisdom we gain about how we got here, and how we're people of value and can keep plugging away to transcend those situations. We are survivors on our way to being thrivers!

I needed to ponder this, I guess, because I have been feeling a struggle with energy and motivation today. The cause of that is feeling pressured to come up with a plan on how I'm going to prioritize my gym workouts that my doctor has told me I need, and see if I can coordinate that with a big decluttering effort, since my mechanic has told me I need to get heavy stuff out of my van - and somehow make all THAT come out okay with my tight finances. Gasoline to get to the gym, buy healthy food, keep up with the day to day...

I did make the call to the social worker regarding the clutter and storage plan; she's not in today so I left a voicemail. It's really windy here today and supposed to get even windier later. Wind grates on my nerves. Oh, and I need to do paperwork about my student loan again - seems there's always some little issue to be clarified. I miss having a printer where I live - I got rid of a big bulky old one when I moved; it was out of toner anyway and not worth buying another cartridge for. Now I just don't have the bucks to buy a printer, and really no place to put it. So printing out a letter to someplace like the student loan place means a trip to the library.

And there are litterboxes and laundry and all that stuff to try and fit in and I just feel OVERWHELMED with it all. My brain and body both feel so sluggish.

Bottom line, I don't want to adult today. Can I be a cat instead? Curl up in a cozy spot and sleep? I think I'd be good at it.

Good Morning

Hi Tatoulia :)
Thank you for the drive by.
Thinking about you and hoping things are getting better.
(((HUGS)))

Hi Anonymoniker :)
Hope today all the noise and commotion has ended there. :)

Hi Pain :)
Sorry that those mice are making such a big mess in the drawers.
Keeping the kitchen as your number one priority is wonderful.
Kitchens are where we keep our food and they are very easily the place that gets into the worst conditions the quickest.
Keep up that fantastic routine for maintenance you have established! :D

Yesterday it snowed a lot and the winds were terrible.
Very cold last night and today, down in the 20s.
Tried all week and weekend to get him to help do some very necessary stuff around the home/yard.
Things that I am not physically strong enough to do.
He wouldn't :(
I am extremely depressed and worrying about how I might manage to do this all by myself.

Still here. Just driving by. Keep up the good work everyone.

Its weird how all the war sounds of gunfire & i think cannons, too, kinda echoed things with my family...the local cops would not help me years ago, any more than my family has..it is a miracle i survived it all...ive never done anything bad to anyone, either...that doesnt seem to matter, tho...
Tillie & Joan, im glad yall made that decision...im getting close to that same decision, too....

Its weird how all the war sounds of gunfire & i think cannons, too, kinda echoed things with my family...the local cops would not help me years ago, any more than my family has..it is a miracle i survived it all...ive never done anything bad to anyone, either...that doesnt seem to matter, tho...
Tillie & Joan, im glad yall made that decision...im getting close to that same decision, too....

Hi Joan,anony,Tillie, and others.

Today I'm redoing dwarfism. Auto check is killing me. Drawers.redoing my drawers. Redoing all chest of drawers and all other drawers. Nasty mice. Make mess in them . So I'm keeping them lined with plastic bags from grocery. But I also remove everything. Make a small drawing of what I would ultimately like to have there instead of accumulated clutter. So it like a kit in drawer.
But I vacuum and and use pee bleach towelettes.

At this point it may be useless. As by the time we move. I'll need to do it then too. ...

And who knows what the next place will be like.

I have had kitchens in past where I couldn't function. I can relate. Recently to. I just decided the nasty stuff wasn't worth keeping anymore. I couldn't part with most of it. So most of it got put Into tubs and taken to storage.
I started with
1 counters clearing everything. And sterilizing.
2 emptied all drawfs. Only vacuumed and wiped out.
3 tossed out everything from fridge.
4 packed up everything from cupboards.
5 made a drawing of what I want it to look like when I'm done putting to back.
6 put it back cupboard at a time.
7 take what doesn't fit to storage or to donation center.

That seems simple but tool almost a month.
However when it was done I was very glad to oil soups and things In The crockpots again.
It is my #1 place to defend as reclaimed space.
I used to make where I sleep the priority. But I do that no matter what anyway. So it had priorities.

Bedding
Kitchen - common area
Bathroom- common area
Living room where I answer the door - common area
Dinning room - common area
Hallways common areas.
Other people's rooms.

I will be moving soon.
I watched de clutter videos last year where I got the message. Sometimes due to illness we have to move , sometimes due to illness other people move for us either we like it or not.

To get out ahead of such a situation I see coming.
I've put the amount of time in to make sure I purge what I want purged, and not what someone else decides to purge for me.

So
SO , I GOT A. Storage bin. At a good Introductory rate.
This opened up temporary space to to empty 1 whole room at a time.
As I reclaimed living space in the common areas. I started asking for help.
The kitchen was first, and the bathroom second.
This way helpers didn't have leave. To eat or pee.
I asked for four hours. But what got was an army.

I couldn't believe it , but less than three months the entire house was void of clutter and it was repainted and recarpeted. Only 6 times in my adult life has it been this level of clean living space.

Thing is I didn't intend or set out to go all the way. And the reality is I've only moved our hoard of clutter into a storage unit. It's highly organized, but it's still a hoard of clutter non the less. It's just that I don't live in it anymore or for the time being.

It was started by coming here, finding Tillie, and the others. I have a problem emotionally moody. If I express that moldiness to the others I live with , no one FEELS like doing anything.

So I came here to vent. The cost was I couldn't rant. I made a deal with myself , I would only vent here if we're doing something no more matter how small to improve my situation.

It became my winter project to go room by room .
Completly clearing the rooms 1 by 1 .


Now that's parts done. I'm trying to keep it that way till we move. So now routine is very effective.
Trash day is all important.
And laundry day is only laundry day.
I now also have a storage day. Early Saturday mornings. Or Sunday if Saturday doesn't happen.

OK I'm acting like a clean freak. Well not really.
Someone is Ill in my family. And we need help , not asking anyone here to be clear. But from our family friends, Co workers, church and local assessors. We are getting help and services .

I have cleaning person come once a month now.
This helps keep thingsin a routine. Routine seems to be key for me so I keep doing what seems to work.
If I were to move tomorrow. I could do it in 16 hours. Except the storage unit.- except the hoard.

I no longer fear moving , or purging the hoard .
I've sold $1088 and have donated $1,000 to charity.
The hoard has been halved, and the remainder is organized.

I'm so grateful , (((hugs)))

Good Morning Everybody :)

Hi Joan :)

Hi Anonymoniker :)
Back in the 1980s I finally severed all contact with my family.
They are not nice people who do mean nasty selfish evil things.
They have no morals or social conscience.
If they had not been family I would have never had anything to do with people like them.
They all have done unforgivable things to me.
It has been the best thing I have ever done for myself.
I used to hope they would all grow up and change but after so many years I gave up hope that they ever would.
I deserve to be treated better and now refuse to be abused by them any more.
Sorry that your weekend has been disrupted by the emergency preparedness commotion.
(((HUGS)))

Yesterday the wind was raging so no outside play.
This morning it is snowing!!!!
:D

Joan, my sister isnt ill. My Mom meant shed like me to get together with the rest of the family before she dies(my Mom), since shes is in her 80s.
Ive been a complete wreck over this. Theres no way she understands or even remembers the damage all that did to me, years ago...
Also, all day yesterday our local cops, fire dept., etc. had an event to practice for emergencies down near the end of my property. It has literally sounded like a war going on. That has also really shaken me up....its gonna start back up this morning again soon, too...

Hi, everyone. I have not been able to cook in years. Too sick, and stove all covered with stuff. I can only boil water.

Anony, if your sister is seriously ill, just do whatever you feel you need to do for yourself to get closure. Don't let your mother guilt you into anything. I hear you about humans. I am by myself because virtually my whole family did nasty stuff to me, so I finally jumped ship. They are all very disappointed and angry that I survived on my own.

My heart bleeds for them.

HI :)

Hi Pain :)
WAY TO GO!!!! for being in maintenance! :D
Happy that the others are now starting to appreciate it with more visitors coming by.
The best "home" I have been in so far as heating and cooling goes has been in caves.
Constant 58 degrees all the time.
But they tend to be dark and spooky and a bit damp.
;P

Things that I have learned from Youtube have been fascinating and educational.
For several weeks I have been watching a couple of barn owls hatch and rear their eight chicklets.
My cats enjoy the bird feeder, squirrel and bunny videos.
I learned different ways to kill wasps and dangerous methods to remove tree stumps.
I watch live stream videos of dams over flowing and get weather reports for my area.
So many videos about decluttering and Tedtalks on everything.
I really enjoy the videos of people exploring abandoned homes and wonder whatever happened to the people who lived there.
My Blu-ray/DVD player plays Youtube on the big screen TV and I watch that instead of regular broadcast almost exclusively.

Good ole YouTube.

I figured out the world's energy crisis forever.
And how to heat my house with pee.
How to catch rodents and turn them into fish for eating after employing then as fertilizer machines. Amazing.
So after that I worked on my ultimate house. Using foam core. Basically if we figure out the energy crisis. It will be related to house size.

So I'm working on a home that heats itself. Rather than anything else. Structure and insulation + internal heat . What's missing is the ability to build it ourselves. But I believe that technology is also all over YouTube.
Basically build six foot long X 1 X 1 Lego boxes out of carbon fiber. Fill with insulation. And walla walls in a day.

Oh. So much better than feeling helpless in a hoard of despair. Didn't go to the unit today. Just keeping the kitchen and bathrooms clean. Tomorrow the rest of the common areas .
I now use three giant tubs that have wheels on Them.
I put all things that don't go in the common areas into the the tubs. For each person there is a tub. This way I don't have to ask them to pick up after themselves.
Once a tub gets full . I empty it myself.
At first they really hated not being able leave their junk all over the house.
But now so many people Come by. The house is always ready to receive guests. I'm hearing less and less objections.
Even mother in law has been less naggy. I'm in maintenance mode I'd guess i could say.

Good Morning Everyone :)

Hi Tatoulia :)
Whenever "S" is in the hospital I can never reach him by phone.
Sometimes the phone is not near his bed or it's not ringing on his end or a million other reasons.
So I just talk to his nurse to see how he's been doing and wait for him to call me.
Very frustrating.
Have you been able to get some rest?
Have you been trying to eat something?
Wishing I was there to make sure. ((((HUGS))))

Woke up before 5am
after a while I was able to fall back to sleep.
Nothing much planned for today so I will get outside and play. :D

Thank you CM & Tillie.

Now my oven heats low so I up it by 25 degrees.

I tried to call mom today. Nurse said she's up but I bet the phone's just out of reach.

Oh, Tatoulia, so sorry about your mom. I was apparently writing my post at the same time you were posting yours and just now saw yours. My heart goes out to both of you. I'll put you in my prayers tonight. Take care.

Well, the "good" cake was more overdone than I realized! It broke apart coming out of the pan. I felt a little sad, yet also had to laugh. This is the second year in a row I've messed up my cake for the Bingo. I feel like a failure as a Church Lady, LOL!

Tomorrow I need to go to the store so I'll see if I can find anything that's affordable but doesn't look totally tacky, and if I do I'll run it over to the church. If not, there's always next year. Third time a charm and all that. And I'll try to come to an understanding with my roommate's oven. It needs to be set lower but not too low, and I haven't found the right temperature and timing for cakes with it. Need to bake more of them to see if I can figure it out.

Quick drive by. Things went from bad to worse, I'm afraid, as mom fractured her hip and was rushed to hospital just about within 24 hours of getting home from the hand infection. Her surgery was today. On top of being sick and worried, I cried just about non-stop yesterday. I was inconsolable. Well she made it through the surgery and I'll see her tomorrow. Surgeon called around 8PM and another dr called me at midnight.

I can't remember if I mentioned that my dr just wants me to rest to get well. She actually said she doesn't care if I take any of my meds right now, she just wants me to rest.

This is a tough time.

Everyone/you know I am rooting for you. I can't wait to get back into the swing of cleaning and reducing.

Tillie thank you for being here. I feel better knowing I have you.

Hi CriticalMass :)
My fingers are crossed that you get that help you need to relocate the storage.
Great that any paid rent will transfer over.
Really, really, really hoping and wishing that you win that $$$ prize. (((hugs)))
Whatever, have a good fun time this weekend! :D

I did stuff to improve the condition of the house today.
Weekend is predicted to have more snow fall so maybe I won't get out much.
Did spend a little time outside today just because it was nice out but now it's getting all cloudy, cold and dark early.

Hi Tatoulia :)
Thinking about you (((HUG)))


TTYL :)

P.S. I also meant to add, regarding the storage unit, that on Monday I'm going to call that social worker from my clutter club, since I haven't heard from her yet, and my busy week will be over by then. I hope she will have the time to still do this plan we hatched. I will keep everyone updated - cross your fingers and toes for me!