So Bitsy,
Re phone, laptop etc,
Talk to us about the dining room table. (The thing we all have trouble keeping clear! :) :) )

If you drive fast in the rain you might get to practice responding to hydroplane slides. :) :)

Hi robin,
thank you for choosing to trust us enough to post.

This daily chat thread is where people are talking about their challenges and accomplishments each day.

You talk about being at the bottom. What are you dealing with in your life that you feel like you can say something about here?

After reading many websites, this group seems to be the most friendly and safe.
Can any of you give me directions on where to begin on this site. The reason I chose this group to ask is that it is the only group I see that's up-to-date and posts daily.

I'm at the bottom trying to reach up to see a bit of light for any help or suggestions. You all seem so well ahead of the game and positive.

Thanks for any suggestions.

Tillie: I love bee balm when it blooms. Their little red fuzzy tops remind me of Beaker from the Muppets.
It is so hard sharing space with people who cannot see their own clutter. I once had to share office space with a coworker whose desk was always a mountain of dirty dishes, empty drink containers, half finished reports, files, etc. It would often cascaded down onto my desk. The following year I got my own office.
Hang in there, Tillie. Maybe one day his eyes will be opened.

took dog for a walk this morning, then cleaned up front steps I have been scraping/sanding, with shop vac. friend dropped by her dog, and we had a nice visit. I planned to keep dogs separate, she suggested letting them meet each other. Well it went surprisingly well, both dogs are same size. I have them separate now that I will be leaving to go to doctor. started raining. grey day
chat was so great last night, feel like I know new people better now, was feeling disconnected
ok, off to see doctor. If I drive fast in the rain, will it wash dirt off my car? I know I need to wash it, and vacuum it soon.

dave,
so I will get the hang of this place soon I hope.

thanks for the encouragement and advice.I really need it. really have trouble getting started. I keep up with trash and recycling from car pretty well.but lots and lots of stuff. ... I spend most of the time in my car. can be outside,get better signal for phone and laptop,comfortable "chair" etc
This day is only about half over so I can maybe get going and get something done...

Good morning :)

Twinkles and I have been outside enjoyng the cool morning breeze.
Nothing much to do today.
Yesterday I spent some time working on (playing with) the doll house and then did some beading.
It is annoying/depressing/frustrating to live with so much squalor all around and yet not be able to do anything about it.
Oh Well, I will just keep my blinders on and try to only see my no clutter zones which are neat & tidy.
The Bee Balm is blooming and the Humming birds really love that flower. :D
Going now to make myself a fried egg sandwich for breakfast.
So nice to read all your posts and not feel so all alone here. :)

Bitsy,
My heart goes out to you.

3 brief comments for you.

In a post a long time ago Tille mentioned meditation. I think one of the things you need is a relief from the unrelenting mental pressure of all those "events" pressing in on you. A suggestion for something to try. Sit down in a chair. Set a timer for 3 minutes. Close your eyes. Just think about breathing. Breathe in, breathe out. A problem will come around and want your attention. Just say "It's not your turn, I'm breathing." and go back to breathe in, breathe out. You can increase the time as you become more comfortable with sitting quietly.

The easiest way that I have found for me to clean my car is to get one or two small boxes and a plastic sack for trash. I just go through the interior and put the trash in the plastic sack and everything else in the boxes. (And I mean EVERYTHING at this step.) Two expansions on that are Trunk: same steps; Glove Box: remove everything except Owners Manual, Current registration and Insurance Card, and a pen and eversharp pencil. My next steps, you will have to modify for your situation, vacuum car, put an old beach towel over back passenger seat and put back anything I absolutely have to have in the car such as flashlight, trash sack and ice scraper. I then can do keep or go on the boxes at my convenience.

I recently replaced a microwave. My very brief version of comments is that I thought I saw similar things at WalMart, Target and Best Buy. I finally purchased one from Lowes and bought an extended warranty along with the microwave. If you only need a small or medium size one, you should be able to budget one in, even with just social security.

Barb: Glad you got your computer back!! Hope it does keep working! As for the chat room tomorrow, just check in when you want to and see if someone is already there. Lately, you're likely to find people there almost every day, but it's a little hard to predict how early. I checked in at 5:30am Pacific Time today, but I'm not saying people check in there that early every day.

Me: One of the first things I plan to do today is to get two of my smaller-sized moving boxes. I will label one "throw away" and leave the other one unlabeled. I plan to look around quickly and find items I haven't used in the past year and put them in the unlabeled box. If I know for sure at the time I pick up the item that I can trash it, I will go ahead and put it in the "throw away" box. When I get the unlabeled box full, I plan to go through it and try to be realistic about whether I am ever going to use the item, and take things from there. Much of my dejunking lately has been paperwork and large items (like that large air cleaner I gave away). This will be the first time in a while that I have "gone on the attack" with smaller, non-paper items.

One reason I want to put the items-to-trash in the throw away box first instead of putting them directly into the trash is that I want to actually fill the box. I think that in my case, seeing that box full before I actually dispose of the stuff will help me "feel" my progress. I'll know that a certain number of cubic feet of stuff is going out the door. Just as an FYI, in general, I'm not one to have a lot of obvious trash (like empty food wrappers) lying around, at least not these days. If I do find things like that, I will go ahead and put them in the trash right away. For this project, I am thinking of other types of things I can trash, such as old, worn-out T-shirts, the model of my teeth that was made when I got a certain dental device several years ago (and which the new dental assistant unknowingly broke when she handed it to me), and so forth.

The first place I plan to go to look for these types of items is in overstuffed drawers. We'll see how it goes.

Good morning!
I got my computer back yesterday afternoon. I am not sure it is fixed. I may have to drive to Indianapolis and leave it down there if I continue to have problems. The Geek Squad here is not very good. I used to live in a smaller city with a better mindset on repairing things that don't work. Where I live now, if something breaks, people just throw it out and get a newer model. Sad.
I bought material for curtains 40% off yesterday. I will sew those when the living room is completely decluttered. I am not much of a seamstress, but I can manage the straight seams for curtains. The vision of having new curtains in the window gives me the motivation to keep going on this room. I will still need to paint and replace the old, worn, stained carpet. One step at a time.
Today I will do another load of laundry, stay current on dishes, and get some things put back in their places. The toter will go out for pickup tomorrow morning.
This afternoon I will need to run to the Farmer's Market and the feed store for dog and cat food.
On Thursday, I will be ready to begin decluttering again and refill the toter. If there are others checking in on the support group Thursday, let me know what time you will be checking in. Sometimes taking a break from throwing stuff out makes it hard for me to start in again. I tend to procrastinate and get sidetracked.

diane: It's so great that you are getting in touch more with friends!

Me: It was very nice this morning to wake up to a more-cleaned-off dining room table. Nice to be meeting more new people in the Sunday and Tuesday night chats! See some of you later today in the chat room to work on our "stuff."

Thanks for everyone's wonderful help and support.

another day getting paint off steps, big sander used last, to smooth out lumps
supposed to rain tonight and tomorrow so will work inside.
Tomorrow have a friend dropping dog off at noon, then have to go to Bend for doctor appt.
Today watered outside
2 friends called and had nice long chats, have been wanting to connect more with friends
one friend ask me to visit mom in nursing home, will do that and make sure all is well with her
when I sign off, have to take a shower, been too many days of dirty work and no shower

bitsy: Glad you posted, and I'm glad you are trying to get some help with all that work. Like Tillie has said, I'm sorry that that one business person treated you rudely!

Tillie: Hope you found something very fun to do!

Barb: We will miss you at the chat tonight.

Me: For most of the nights during the past week, I've gotten much less than an ideal amount of sleep. Last night, however, I was able to get to sleep relatively early and slept longer than I think I've slept in years! That felt really good. It also gave me a much later start than usual to my day, but I'm not complaining!

Got a little laundry dealt with this morning and attended a midday function with some friends. I decided I needed to stay off my foot later in the day (the one that's been giving me trouble), so I didn't get many cleaning/decluttering tasks done. (Foot seemed to improve quite a bit as a result of propping it up.) I did get several important personal phone calls dealt with while I was resting my foot. I do plan to spend about fifteen minutes cleaning/clearing my dining room table before the chat tonight, hang up some clothes to dry, and also add to my gratitude list. I'll fess up that my dining room table is too cluttered at the moment to get it truly cleared off in that amount of time, but at least there will be improvement.

Hugs to everyone.

Hi Bitsy
Welcome :D
Posting here is just fine.
Sounds like you have a LOT going on there. (((hugs)))
I would call Matt Paxton's business and ask them for an estimate.
Sorry the other man was rude. :(
What is the first most important thing you need to attend to?
Figure out what you need to do first and not worry about trying to fix everything at once.
One thing, one step at a time.

i don't know how to do this or where i should put this. was going to put it on support group but don't know where best to put it. here? or as a new topic? or on the support group? i am so confused.
anyway i will put it her for now-
Under pressure to empty large house 15 rooms (depending on what is counted as rooms)
Financial pressure. 2 mortgages. small income (social security). expenses out of control.
Family pressure. because of my age, deteriorating health, financial situation, depression, etc.
Have gotten two estimates from companies. Expensive- and the one guy that came to do estimate bordered on being rude/callous. The estimate from them basically said something like 5 dumpsters. four days. not at all the detail I had expected. the other company seems maybe okay. Wanted to try to contact Max Paxton's company though. (since I am in metro Atlanta and they are listed on this site)
Having trouble trying to decide what to try to do with anything left in that house.
. but this week I really need to concentrate on getting car cleaned out enough to have check engine light checked, (few months old "new" used engine) because I have to get emissions test done and order this year's car tag by July 2! And having trouble doing even that. . depressed, upset, worrying, and car now has new problem- it intermittingly won't come out of park- so far releases if I quickly pump the brake. Microwave quit last week. My son just informed me the washer will not go to spin cycle! I can't think- can't handle any more. I don't know where to turn. I guess that's why I am here-
Sorry about length. tried to summarize situation ahead of time because I type slow.
Maybe should post this on msg board instead of on support group chat tonite.

Good morning, everyone,
It is raining again today and we have flood warnings. Yesterday we had quite a storm and I had to chase down my lawn chairs. I have not had to water my garden and it is doing well.
This morning I will do some general maintenance---dishes, laundry, vacuuming. This afternoon I need to run some errands. I want to stop in to the fabric store and look for curtain and pillow material for the living room to go with the new sofa. My old drapes are old and stained. The hardware is broken. Somewhere in this clutter is my sewing machine and new hardware.
I still have no computer so I won't be on the chat tonight.
Have a great day everyone.

Hi to all. Good to "see" so many of you at the Sunday night chat and to work with some people during the daytime chat today.

Barb, it's great that you are able to start sharing with friends in your town. There are so many of "us" out there with this issue! It's terrific to be able to open up to others about it as well as to help spread the news that there is hope!

Today I got some laundry dried and put away, ran a load of dishes, brought things in from my vehicle that I'd taken with me on my little weekend trip (things I didn't get unloaded yesterday), unpacked and put away some (but not all) of the stuff that was in my bags, did some more reading in Digging Out, and met for a while with some friends. I also did a tiny bit of grocery shopping. Probably did some other things I've forgotten to list.

Happy evening.

Good afternoon friends.
This is my 3rd attempt to post here today. I hope this one goes through. I don't have access to Word so I just have to type it in on the phone.
Since the toter is full I need to focus on maintenance projects for the next few days.
The yard is mowed and the cat and both dogs were brushed out.
Making steady progress and getting weekly support here has helped me to begin talking about my hoard and clutter with 2 friends in town who share this problem. And that is a good thing.

I must confess. Went to garage sales this morning. Will now have to donate at least as much as I bought.

New dog let me sleep last night, hooray. She is so low maintenance compared to other dogs I have taken care of. Tomorrow we will go on a fun outing. I think to a lake since it will be hot. I had a lazy day today, recovering from work and stress of visitor yesterday. Watering lawn now. All dishes done, laundry put away. Pulled some weeds. I ate some fresh raspberries today, big treat.
The dog I took care of for 27 days, his mom called today, then stopped by to thank me in person and return a plant vase I had sent home lilacs in last month, I told her to keep it, she said she wanted to stop by to thank me. Of course I thought she was going to pay me more for dog sitting since I undercharged her. That didn't happen. It was nice seeing her, she said I need to start saying no to things I do not want to do. She and her husband were very pleasant to visit with, today is their wedding anniversary.
Looking forward to having fun tomorrow and then chat.

I did the grocery shopping and put it all away. Have to go out and work tomorrow morning early. (Wish I could find my watch.)

Peace,
Kathy

Good morning, all:
Tillie: when we used to feed the cats in the garage in the summer, we would put the food dish inside an old round cake pan filled with water. Ants can't swim.
I slept in until 9:30 this morning. Working so hard on the living room this week was hard, but so worth it. The men delivered the sofa yesterday at 10:45. It is pretty and very comfortable. About 1/3 of the living room looks nice. I can't wait to finish. I'm on a roll now. Unfortunately, the decluttering will have to be put on hold until after trash pickup day. The toter is full. But I have other house maintenance projects to keep me busy.
Today I will clean the kitchen (including cleaning off the kitchen table) and do a load of laundry. I need to drop off the laptop at the Geek Squad.
Tonight I will go downtown to the street fair. There will be food booths and 3 stages of music. One of my favorite bands plays at 4:00.
Have a great weekend, everyone, and remember to take some time for fun.
I will not be on the Sunday night chat. Trying to follow the discussion and type in a response on my tiny phone screen is impossible.

PS re your reward smoothie, Diane...when my daughter was here in January she gave me a glass jar of jelly beans that they were giving away at the veterinary conference she attended in Orlando. I stuck it in the back of the closet. Now I am rewarding myself with jelly beans for doing the dishes and cleaning off the counters. They are certainly not healthy but somehow getting the task done does not work as a reward for me, even though I know it "should." Oh well...I know I probably "should" have just thrown out the whole jar anyway, but I do not think they will kill me.

Peace,
Kathy

SLOW PROGRESS DEPT. In 2002 I bought a book called Cut the Clutter and Stow the Stuff, which suggested making an inventory of things you collect, like in my case, books. I had 2400 books approximately at that time. I kept decluttering, selling, donating books. I just did a recount yesterday and I have 1410 approx. in the house now. I know I got rid of more than a 1000 books. The problem is, they keep coming in ..I guess that is better than the count going up, though. And I cheated by getting a Kindle. However, digital clutter is much less space-occupying and in my mind is better for that reason.

Hint to those who have ants: They hate cinnamon and will not go through a cinnamon blockade. That is especially helpful if you are sensitive to pesticides, etc. Besides that, spraying them with pesticides if they are the small ones will only kill the workers which will soon be replaced.

I've been keeping up with the dishes and laundry. Need to find time and energy today to go grocery shopping and put away groceries.

Peace,
Kathy

This morning I cleaned up lots of stuff in house and yard, nothing like the pressure of a visitor to get us moving. Kathy I appreciated your reminder to throw things away for practice, helped me toss some things that did not belong in my life anymore.
LR bet you look all fancy in your new stuff, sure hope you have a safe and enjoyable trip. Barb, are you relaxing on your new sofa? After the all the prep work, hope you love new sofa. Tillie, piss ants, and a whole army of them, sounds like no fun at all.
I kept smelling something rotten, discovered it was a rotten potato at the bottom of bag I bought last week, took a few out of the top to keep, threw the rest away. Got it out in time for garbage pickup.
Just had my "you did good work today" smoothie. It is cooler than yesterday. May get a second wind. Still have a few dishes to wash, clean counters and a few other things. Did wash bathroom floor. I am doing so much better than a year ago. Clutter creeps back in, then have to have a visitor, then can see it. I am still blind to clutter at times. Getting better though.
Roxie, good you are feeling better and have some energy now. My garbage and recyling carts are still at the street. Tillie having fun this weekend is a genious idea. My new loaner dog is very small I hear, so I could easily take her and me to a lake for a day.
Would like to wash and wax car and vacuum. When I got in it yesterday, was very aware how dirty it looked from all the smoke that settled on it from fires, clear air now.
My mouth is much better, now just a small area is swollen, might be bone chip, not constant pain like it was, so happy to have no problems today. Hugs and clinks to you wonderful support people!!

Barb: Hope all goes well in this last stretch of the race to get ready for the sofa!

diane: Congrats on so much work. Yea that the modem situation is all finished now (old one out, new one in and working)! I'm happy that you got to see your old friend. When that sort of thing happens with me, it helps put me in touch with the "me" that somehow got lost years ago, the "me" that was more social (although I've never exactly been a social butterfly) and the "me" that felt so much more positive about herself. Hope things with the new dog go well.

Kathy: The composition notebook and picture frame comment made me chuckle. I think the practice does help.

Me: Later in the day yesterday, I got dishwasher mostly unloaded, laundry dried, wedding gift bought, some bills in the mail, and made a start at (ugh) shopping for a new dress. (I probably did some other things I forgot about.) Was very tired in the evening. Tried to go to sleep early, but that didn't work out so well. I spent some of my awake time looking around on the Internet for ideas of where to shop for shoes that would be dressy but that have better support than some I currently own. I freely spend money on some types of things, but good shoes (ones that are good for my feet) usually are not on the list. Need to rethink my spending priorities.

Goals for this morning (after breakfast and such) are to get outside before it's too hot and get a lot of things (like tools) out of my vehicle in prep for my little trip tomorrow. I also need to get the wedding present wrapped, and I need to finish getting the stuff together that I'm going to wear for the event. I might stop by a certain local shoe store (one that sells high-quality shoes) and see what they have in stock that might be good for me. I also need to add to my gratitude list and put away laundry.

Iced tea clink to your coffee mug, Roxie.

Up at 5:45 a.m. and having cereal and coffee before I make one last ditch effort on the living room. The sofa delivery men will be here between 9 and noon.

This morning I painted the deck railing that I previously pressured washed, scraped, sanded, looks ok. Did dishes, one drainer heaping full, put away when I got home. Still have a few dishes and dog dishes to wash.
Drove to Bend found UPS, dropped off modem and got receipt. Went to Costco and ran into an old friend of mine, we had a great chat, we used to be really close. I went to her wedding 10 years ago, I could hardly believe it had been that long. felt good that she was so happy to see me, and I was to see her.
I bought lots of good food.
watered lawn tonight
was good to get out and about. I will finish dishes in morning and vacuum. New dog is coming in afternoon, so have morning to tidy up.
Laundry is caught up now.
good reading everyone's posts

Hi, everybody...happy for everyone's progress. Mar, finding a mistake before your thesis adviser does is major progress!

Finished the laundry, it's all folded and put away. Finished de-cluttering the bookcase, in 30 minutes; threw away two perfectly good composition notebooks and a 4 x 6 picture frame just for practice. Donations still in the car. Had lunch. Now I am going to rest for a while. Label printer ran out of tape just as I was going to label the large binders in the bookcase. I've got an anniversary card out for my daughter and son-in-law but have to find their new address before I send it.

One of the things I recently instituted is a shelf on a bookcase for things I intend to give to specific people. It now has quite a few items, I think I should put sending them on my agenda.

Peace,
Kathy

Good morning, everyone.

I was really tired yesterday after having gotten relatively little sleep Tuesday night. For that and various other reasons, I didn't get much done yesterday in terms of cleaning and decluttering. I got some good sleep last night, though, so I'm glad about that.

I got out the door before 7am this morning and went out to that rural area to do a little work. Checked on the animals' water supply and worked on getting rid of a few more unwanted (invasive) trees. After getting back into town, I got some more debris out of the yard at my family's home and got the trash can put out for pickup. Am doing some laundry, planning to eat lunch soon, then need to do a little shopping for the event I'm attending this weekend (the one I mentioned on Sunday night's chat).

Hugs to all. May post more later.

Hi Roxie, nice to see you here.
Best wishes for your cardiology appointment!!

Last night I vacuumed the kitchen, living room, dining room, hall and den...using a mask, no asthma flare-up. This morning so far I made a nice breakfast, did my infusion, left a message again for the person I missed yesterday, made bed, put in a load of laundry (which I need to move to the dryer as soon as I finish this post), put the dishes in the dishwasher.

I need to finish getting ready for Sunday's work...declutter another bookcase, take the books to donate to the library. Finish the load of laundry when it comes out of the dryer. The floors and laundry are all new responsibilities as before my once a week help was doing that. I guess I should work on the bookcase before I take the donate books to the library as there may be more...have to put the trash out tonight.

I stopped in on the chat window this morning but nobody was there...trouble with being a morning person on the East Coast. Nice "seeing" RJ and Mar and Vi there before bed last night, though. Keep making progress, friends!

Peace,
Kathy

Today is the final opportunity to clean before the sofa is delivered tomorrow. The living room is not going to be completely clear of clutter. My main goal is to have a clear space for it and make it as easy as possible to get the old one out and the new one in. This work is going much slower than I would like, but I am making steady progress. I am feeling very anxious today.

I am still laboriously typing out messages on my phone so I will keep this short.

Yea for the progress, Kathy. Frustrating that you missed the phone call.

diane: It's so motivating to me to watch you move forward in so many areas. Gives me a lot of hope for me.

Hugs to all.

I got modem packaged up and ready to take to UPS, not sure where that is. I was careful to follow directions about writing info in correct places, and packaging as they said, so hopefully they will stop charging me for it. Tomorrow will take and ship. What a relief to have it hooked up and boxed up. I need to hook up tv so can see in kitchen, then more likely to do dishes, it worked before, also cooked more when I had tv distraction.
sewed a little today, love being creative
watered all plants outside, trimmed edges of lawn and flower beds, cut all dead stuff off, did I already post this? that modem was an emotional drain, silly as it seems now. Tomorrow will also buy groceries. Plan to tidy up things, since new dog and new dog owner will be here friday.
It is still a major stress to have strangers over, especially ones that live in nice houses.
Another money thing I have procrastinated on, will do tomorrow. Have to take receipt to insurance to get $100 that I paid in advance, so it is worth it, just difficult to ask for money, even though they owe it to me.
they are raising premiums by 20% I heard.
so grateful we have this site and each other

Yay for the modem being done, Diane!

I did declutter a desk file drawer. And make the salmon loaf and some sauteed zucchini for dinner, and clean up after dinner (in two shifts, back was hurting).

I am realizing that I am going to have to do something to maintain the floors now that I no longer have any household help. Sweep or vacuum or mop or combinations.

The lawn guy came and cut the lawn and trimmed the hedges and hauled away the lamp post and the brush. The lady from my mom's town's Area Agency for the Aging returned my phone call which I made to her on Monday morning but I didn't hear the phone ring at 3 pm, even though I was home. Very frustrating.

Peace,
Kathy

Yay for the modem being done, Diane!

I did declutter a desk file drawer. And make the salmon loaf and some sauteed zucchini for dinner, and clean up after dinner (in two shifts, back was hurting).

I am realizing that I am going to have to do something to maintain the floors now that I no longer have any household help. Sweep or vacuum or mop or combinations.

The lawn guy came and cut the lawn and trimmed the hedges and hauled away the lamp post and the brush. The lady from my mom's town's Area Agency for the Aging returned my phone call which I made to her on Monday morning but I didn't hear the phone ring at 3 pm, even though I was home. Very frustrating.

Peace,
Kathy

Yea, diane, for the modem! Whoo-hoo!

As I mentioned in the post yesterday, I didn't plan to do much in terms of cleaning/decluttering. I did go buy more sponges and get a little more work done on the wall-washing project. I also ran a load of dishes. Did some of this during the daytime online chat.

My Tuesday evening event went reasonably well. (I'd used some of the daytime online chat time to help me get ready for that event; I set some fifteen minute deadlines for myself for some of my event-prep tasks to help keep me from getting too perfectionistic as I worked on the tasks. That helped me get the things done much faster than I would have otherwise.

More later, probably. Happy evening.