Dianne great insight, optimism and extremely helpful.
Well I had such fun taking stuff off deck and putting away in garage. Then for the reward I burned a pile of leaves just for fun. I made a hohum fire pit last summer, and realized I can make a real fire with wood and roast a hot dog just to pretend I am camping. Have only used it so far for burning debris. Now that I have been reminded to balance fun and work, have thought about fun things to do. I put a curtain up in walkway, looks so good, it was fun and only took a few minutes, have been "planning" to do it for days. I also started putting up racks and peg board up in garage so I can organize things where I can find them. Was so much better than working inside all day.
Emailed boss to meet away from here for dog. She really wants to bring dog here so dog will know she wants him to be here. I understand, told her I have fear she will judge my excess stuff, she knows I have worked on clutter for months, she was very understanding, took the pressure off. My plan next few days is to finish entryway and work on maintenance of kitchen living room, so I can have her bring dog here, and survive it.

Tillie, I did it!!! Thanks, chicken smelled ok but has been in there too long so it felt liberating to toss it plus lots of other stuff. Then remembered how I used to burn in yard for fun. Burned all papers that had my name on it and bank stuff, wasn't as much fun as I remembered but I got into it and enjoyed it. Probably not as much fun because what I was burning, memories, and chances lost instead of just leaves and sticks!!! Thanks again for your support.

Tillie,
Before I go could you please list some of the "hard times" topics so that I'm not completely in the dark? If you know any that could help. Thank you.

Without getting into detail please if you know what are the "hard times" topics.

Hi Lynn :)
I will still be wishing you good luck and best wishes in all you do and strive for.
Remember that the most important thing is to take good care of yourself.
Keep looking for all the answers to your questions, stay curious and interested.
(((hugs)))

Tillie,
I'm sorry that I won't be posting on this site anymore.
I've been judged too many times. I've been to two testing places to test my cognitave skills and both don't support college work, nor do both think I can be a leader. (such as an independant worker).
I've been told(by someone on this site) that I haven't experienced any hard times though everyone's hard times are unique to them I was also told that I don't pay bills for which I do considering only working maybe 11-12hrs/wk on minumum wage and paying my car insurance bill, until I paid off my car, I paid car payments (I've had title for a while now), and paid for my car, I pay for gas for the car which is more expensive and I also pay for my essentials for daily living. I've also had very depressing moments such as a very bad break-up with my boyfriend, loss of family members and now dealing with the debt collectors for bills I can't pay.

I don't know what counts as hard times other than losing a child which would be discrimatory for I choose not to have.

If everyone could be a leader it would be a very boring world and there would be no employees. (not everyone can or wants to be a leader)

I'm very very happy being a follower and asking questions on how things are done.

Is it wrong for saying I'm not afraid to seek a counselor for tips while on my own to not follow my mother? If it is I'm sooo sorry, truely sorrry.
I've always believed in not buying things for comfort but doing physical activity for grieving such as cardio and or strength training to help me feel better. I've always believed in that and would never change even when I can be on my own and still keep in touch with a counselor for positive re-enforcement.
I believe not everyone spirals out of control when they are out on their own even during new hard times to deal with.

YEA!!!! :)
let it go and don't dwell on it.
These things happen. We mean to cook dishes but then get side tracked.
Just don't punish yourself ever by trying to salvage the unsalvagable. :D

Thanks so much Tillie, I would have tried to salvage if possible, out it goes!!!

:D

and again

YEA! :D

Hi Tillie, we posted at same time! I just emailed about meeting her in Bend.

Hi Diane :)
When in doubt throw it out.
Better to be safe than sick when it comes to food.
WAY TO GO!!!! for tackling the papers but especially for walking away from that task as soon as you started to get frustrated. :D

Self care is very important.
Good food, enough sleep, hygeine
We function better when we take care of these things.
It is also important to have equal parts of work, exercise, rest and recreation in oue days.
(((hugs)))

Good morning. I started going through bins of papers in living room this morning. Noticed as soon as I got frustrated and stopped, got up and walked. Started again, frustrated, got up and had boiled egg and cocoa, then started again. Not all done, but I am done for now. A few hours on papers is more than enough for me. Have a big burn bag for papers with personal info, bag of recycle papers and filed most of stuff. Paid bills. Helped so much to hear over and over to time and take breaks. I boiled a chicken days ago to make soup. Afraid to use it, afraid to toss it. I guess logically should toss it, just hate wasting it, and for the fact I procrastinate, and let food rot, over and over. Probably all vegetables are rotten too. When I sign off I will just make decisions and take action, waiting is not going to make it safer. Worse to be sick than to waste $10 food I will prepare some form of protein next. Have frozen vegetables I can use if fresh are rotten. Healthy food is my focus today. I now it will help with the anxiety. Also will load up pill dispenser with vitamins, calcium and D3. Then will shower and wash hair. Today I am procrastinating on calling my boss about not coming to my house, ok will email right now. Thanks for all the support and kindness. I will also be kinder to myself and others today.

Good morning :)

Chat was GREAT last night!

Still foggy & frosty here, I am getting moldy :(

Need to get some fresh fruit & veggies but don't want to go to the store. Oh Well.

Doing the usual stuff here.
cat stuff
sweep stuff
tidy stuff

Oh yeah, almost forgot...
the cat vomited on all her toys this morning.
Need to clean that up too. :(

Just the usual stuff kind of day. :D

By personally destroying the hard drive her self Dianne would be positively certain that all her personal info would be safe.
Then she can happily deposit the rest of the components at the E waste place for recycling. :D

Or do what other people here do.
They bring their old computers to my house.
My Hoarder (has degrees in comp tech) then erases the hard drives for them and he gets to keep the old computers that clutter up my life. :D

He sometimes puts together new computers out of all the old bits and gives them to needy students.

Diane,
I offer this with some trepidation, but...

If you search out a blog by Brooks Palmer, you will see an offer of $40 / hour phone or skype clutter busting sessions.

If you scan his blog posts from June to December you will see what I think is a good spectrum of the way he approaches dealing with clutter. (And you will see that he has almost lost his own life over damage to his body caused by helping others to clear their clutter.

Reading his blog posts refreshes me, helps me remember about the general approach I've chosen for dealing with my messes, and encourages me with a gentle no blame approach to helping me and others.

I am right there with you, with the added difficulty of STILL not being able to throw things away.

I am really really frustrated over the garage situation because I still need to reduce its contents by over 50% and I am unable to look at things and make go choices. I managed to keep some impetus going by ditching the books, laserjet iii printer and refrigerator I talked about in another post; but I still can't clearly see next steps for the garage.

Because of that level of frustration and discouragement, I stayed home from an extended family Christmas gathering because I did not want anymore stuff coming in the house. I still wound up with three things coming in I don't have places for and am very stressed about.

I am considering dropping a bank because of new service charge levels. In doing that, I need to close a safe deposit box for which I am missing one key. It will cost $13 to replace the key. I was going to take 15 mins and empty a cabinet into a box to see if I could find it. Half hour later I had 1 1/2 boxes of stuff, cabinet still partly full. I found money (an expected content in this location), glasses, hand towels (that were there because I didn't want anybody else in the house to have them) tissues, paper towels, receipts(anywhere from 2006 to date), clothing tags (in case of exchange or for bookmarks), torn paper, medicine, flashlights, winter ear bands and gloves, knives, toothbrushes and I don't know what else. I don't know where to put the things I'd like to keep and don't have the mental strength to deal with the paper stuff.

That was immediately before an immediate family gathering for Christmas stockings. After we opened the stockings, I put a number of things, including some things (like a big bag of candy) that I would have liked to keep) in a pile and asked if anybody would like duplicates of things they'd already gotten. Some things disappeared but I still came home with more stuff I have no place to put. I've been spending today (re tillie's post in another thread) regretting the loss of my big candy bag and packet of velcro cable ties because I was trying to control wanting stuff. (I am SURE i will still remember that 20 years from now :).)

I think for the first time in my life, I have some kind of understanding at the visceral level as to why someone would take the route of madness as an avoidance escape from adverse reality events.

One of my three books is Playing Ball on Running Water. I am working hard to remember that feelings are ok and what I am to do is to find what reality is calling me to do next. (I'm pretty sure that is NOT going mad :). )I have to find the focus to get through these depressed feelings and enough clarity to think of some new step of organization or disposal I can hang onto as an example of what I am capable of doing.

I hope that you are able to get through that flaming anger without too much damage to yourself. Unfortunately, I sometimes find that with anger I have to be really focused on lack of reaction and patience to allow time to work for a day or two. I don't know how many times I have done or said things in anger that I have later regretted or had to clean up after.

IT manager at a former employer (Country Boy) used to say a 30-06 bullet was good for a hard drive.

Ways to destroy a hard drive....
smash it with a big hammer
drive a nail into the center of it
incinerate it
leave it sit in a bucket of salty water
place it next to a big strong magnet
or a combination of the above choices.

:D

Dianne :)
OK
you can remove the cover from the tower by unscrewing the screws you see on the outside of it. Some screws may even be located on the bottom.
Once you have removed enough screws to see inside the cover
look for a rectangular box that will also probably be held in with screws on the sides.
This box is the HARD DRIVE
about 6 inches long
4 inches wide
and one inch thick
It may look similiar to the disc drive but doesn't have an opening to put a disc into it.
The HARD DRIVE has ports on the back side with things like "ribbon connectors" attached to it.
Just unplug them.
Got It? :D

Thanks Tillie, I will go for a walk and work outside, don't need to do anymore work inside right now, although I feel like a dictator is punishing me and I must keep working on that pile of crap in craft room. I am noticing my willingness to toss things is returning with the immense anger and disgust at the hoard. Thanks for not criticizing me for being so angry. I feel bad enough about myself today.

Diane
(((((HUGS)))))

Let out that pent up anger in constructive ways.
More walking outside.
Smash some things before they go in the trash.
Just let it all out without hurting yourself.
(((HUGS)))

I woke up still angry today, angry I still have so much to do. Used the anger to rip into the craft room, there was a bookshelf full of old books, including nursing books from the dark ages, loaded them up, can recycle paperbacks, hardbacks have to go in garbage. Almost just stacked up a bunch of boxes of stuff without looking, then said no, find out what is in them and either toss, donate, or keep and label. Two of the boxes had old jewelry I collected that actually have some value, one box was upholstry crap, one had papers, feels good to actually look and make decisions. I worked for 4 hours straight, anger is less now. Just so frustrating at how bad my hooarding got. About 2 hours ago I came so close to an actual nervous breakdown, feeling angry and overwhelmed and like I just couldn't cope with all this left to do. I know there are cleaning people that could help me and am just pissed off I don't know who would be willing to work helping me declutter at a reasonable price. This is the most frustrated and angry I have been in months, what is going on? I have to figure it out before chat so I don't waste my 15 minutes on anger issues.

GOOD MORNING EVERYBODY!!! :D
Day after day of fog has left my brain all foggy.
But the frost is really beautiful covering everything. :)

Hi Diane :)
Glad you went out walking again. :D
WAY TO GO!!! getting stuff done.
Decluttering tends to go in rounds.
You tackle an area, toss everything you know can go.
Live with it for a while then go back around finding even more things to let go of.
The one and only thing that keeps me from having too much stuff is to periodically look through cupboards, drawers, etc and reevaluate the stuff and let some things go.
P.S. speaking your mind here is perfectly acceptable. ;)

Hi Karl :)
LOL good luck working your way through all her excuses. ;)

Hi Barb :)
Great! to see you back! :D
WAY TO GO! getting things done!

Hi Dianne :)
If you remove the HARD DRIVE from the computer and destroy that you can then relax and get rid of the rest of the computer.
All your important information is stored on the hard drive. :)

Hi Roxie :)
WAY TO GO!!!! YEA!!!!
(((hugs)))

Doing his laundry today. Hanging it to dry in his stinky hoarded bedroom.
Did/doing a little to tidy up but mostly just working (playing) on the doll house.
Hope to see you all in chat tonight. :D

Hi Tillie, MayMay, Kari, Diane, Diana, and everyone else,
I haven't been on since August. In August, management cut staff in our department from six to four. My old supervisor was transferred to a new location, and a new supervisor brought in who knew and still knows little about the department. Instead of jumping in when things got hectic, her style is to stand back and yell. As the oldest and longest in the department, problem solving fell on me. The stress has been incredible. Often, I came home and went to bed without even eating dinner. On Dec. 20 I had the option of taking early retirement. I took it.
The last few months, I was so consumed by the pressures of work, that I completely lost control of the house at home. All the progress I made last summer disappeared.
I spent the holidays with friends and family. On Dec. 26 I had the renewed energy to again tackle the house. I started with the kitchen, as it is the room where I feel most at home. Four bags of garbage from the room in general and three bags of trash from the refrigerator and freezer went out for Saturday morning's garbage pick up. The power was off here for two and a half days and I had a lot of rotted and iffy food in the refrigerator and freezer that had to be dealt with.
I am making headway again and it feels great!
I'll check in from time to time and let you all know how it is going. Thanks for your support! Happy 2014!

Thanks Karl for computer info.

I just finished doing dishes for an hour, got them all caught up-------then-----------------I cleaned some stuff out of refrigerator, and spilled a bowl of old soup on the kitchen throw rug. I took
Tillies advice and cleaned it up immediately but it did tick me off. I am short tempered tonight, got annoyed with people not being responsible for their own life, blaming others for their situation, just ticks me off. I have played "victim" for years and now that I am taking responsibility and making my life better, it is not easy to listen to people whine about others behaviors, when in reality, they aren't taking care of their own life. I did that for years, so much easier to blame others for my miserable life, than figure out a way to make my life the best it can be. Sounds like I need a good nights sleep!!

Hello everyone. I had a productive day, cleaned out a file cabinet, some papers were 10 years old, orientations to different jobs etc, why would I keep them 10 years? Went for a walk at 1pm with hoarder friend, I taped toes and was able to walk further today, nice in the sun.
Sorted more stuff this afternoon. I see some progress, continue to be amazed how much stuff I still have, I really did have blinders on, and just did not see the hoard growing.
So HAPPY days are getting longer. Supposed to be warm all week, although cloudy, so have lots of time to finish all insulation work
Cleaned chimney today. Good day today. So nice I have enough time to focus on getting rid of clutter. Hope all is going well with you too.

Good morning everybody! :D
Woke up at the usual time, was still tired, rolled over and got to sleep in. :)

Hi Roxie :)
Getting even the basic stuff done is progress. WTG! :D
Good luck with your decluttering & cleaning. :)

Hi Dianne :)
Thank you :D

Hi MayMay :)
Thank you :D

Hi Karl :)
Thank you for that tip! :D
Now I don't need to lean in to read the screen.

Hi Diane :)
Nope, no cider left. :D
Happy you had a nice visit & walk with your friend.
Could be the shoes you were wearing or even just the socks.
Sometimes socks rub my toes the wrong way, even socks that feel soft. Sometimes it's the seam that rubs us wrong.

Hi Cory :D
Thank You! :D
Karl's tip about Ctrl + has solved our font size problems.
Wishing you all the best this new year has to offer. (((hugs)))

Today I plan to clean the bathroom
sweep and vacuum
wash up a few dishes

The fog is still thick and the frost has grown longer.
It is beautiful to look at but deadly to be out in.
So I guess I won't be doing any garden cleaning today. :D

Thanks Karl for the Ctr +, keys to make bigger, I am self taught on computer so appreciate knowing short cuts. Supposed to be sunny today. My hoarder friend walked up to see me yesterday, we had a fall out when she unfriended me on facebook months ago. She came to see if I was still alive. We went for a walk. She was saying how hard it is to avoid shopping with all the bargains out there, she lit up when talking about shopping, I could relate, just realized what a drug shopping is for me (and her). It was nice seeing her. I have not been walking and today my toes have blisters, from a short walk. Good indication that months of clutter busting must also include walking. Never have had tender toes before this year. I plan to tape toes and walk again today.
Good to hear from all of you.
Tillie, any cider hang over? A whole bottle, I am impressed.

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Or Happy belated birthday I should say.... :)

Hi everybody! :)

Sorry I haven't been on in a really really really long time. :(

I hope everyone had a great Christmas. :)

I spent my Christmas with the guys at the fire station. I love Christmas at the fire station. I know this probably sounds awful... But I'd rather spend my holidays with the guys at the fire station then with my relatives. There's way to much drama in my family; and I hate being around my relatives with all the drama going on.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY Tillie! :)