Anxiety and stress before allowing someone in is completely normal. This is a big step for you and I understand you fears but please just let tomorrow happen before you make any decisions. Once you realize it isn't anything like what you have built up in your mind, you will see that is well worth it and not a big deal. Just meet with her and see what she has to say. I know her personally and you couldn't be in better hands. You will be in control of the cleanup happens, nothing goes without your permission. If you truly want to change, just give it a try. The cleanup can go as slow as you need it to. Your anxiety and emotional state will be monitored by her. I wish you the best of luck with whatever you choose to do.