...i just re-read your post. If he is controlling & possessive with you, maybe you could just be there to spend time with your horses, but the rest of the time at your other new place, till you find other arrangements?

...i just re-read your post. If he is controlling & possessive with you, maybe you could just be there to spend time with your horses, but the rest of the time at your other new place, till you find other arrangements?

Oh, yes, that would make it a little more complicated. Well, in that case, maybe just do the best you can with the situation, while looking for a new place for the future. It may be he has a lot of difficult emotions tied up with clearing out his mother's things? If you arent comfortable there, it may make it hard to wait out changes with him.

I own 5 horses and board 2 others. He has land and we were seeing each other intimately until I moved in and fully realized he was a hoarder. When I first arrived there he kept saying he had just cleared out his moms place and had not gotten rid of it yet. It did not take long to figure out it was not just his moms but mostly his. Also, he seems to consider me as one of his possessions and has tried to be controlling. Now with winter closing in I don't have time to set up another barn and put up fencing or move the hay. I have to wait for spring

Hi, Beth!
Personally, i think living in your own space sounds like a much better idea! If you can try that for a while, id think you would prefer it. What advantages are there to sharing the space with the hoarding roommate? Is it cheaper or ?

Hi. My name is beth. My friend that I live with is a horder. He collects and saves just about everything. We worked together to clean the kitchen and dining area but even though there is now space I still can't use the kitchen without him telling me not to move this or that. I gave up on the other areas of the house. He has pathways everywhere except where we both have to walk and only because I have to keep harping when piles start to gather. I managed to make a deal with him that if he cleared one of the bedrooms out for me to use I would leave him alone. He cleared it out and I moved in. That is when he got possessive about kitchen and I noticed he is very paranoid about anything being moved. It does not help that I have a blue heeler dog that takes stuff and puts them in some hidden place of his own. Argh. I am a bit of a minimalist so I have decided to borrow my friends camper trailer and live in that. Not exactly the best set up but I am not going to change him and yet I need my own space. Any thoughts out there?