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Cory Chalmers
Posted: 17 November 2012 - 10:47 AM
Hi V,
I am very sorry to hear about your tendencies and your struggles. First, I think it is very important for you to realize that your fist real issue is the gentic factor. Obviously with at least 3 generations of this occuring, there is a very real chance that this is a genetic thing you are dealing with. There are abnormalities in the brain and sometimes on chromosomes that get passed down from generation to generation so don't beat yourself up over trying to figure out the why, and just start learning how to manage it, because it isn't going to go away. Second, like most hoarders you get caught up on over analyzing everything in order to make one move forward. This causes you to think you are going to make the wrong decision, so you make no decision at all. This will end in failure until you realize this method doesn't work. You must change your thinking to work for you. If you know you struggle, over analyze, procrastinate, etc. then change your attack. Sit down one day, make a list of what you want to accomplish, then don't stray from that plan. Set a small time limit like 5 to 15 minutes, and pick a task that can reasonably done in that short amount of time. When a hoarder starts to see progress, it is motivating and liberating, but you have to get there. Pick a small area of countertop, one drawer in your dresser, or something like that and just dedicate yourself to getting it done. The key is to stop before you get frustrated, or you start to lose interest. This is something you can learn to manage and a good motivation is to stop this cycle from continuing and you pass this down to yet another generation. Join our Sunday night hoarding support group (info in the red box to the right). Good luck and check in with us often. We can help you get through this!
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V
Posted: 16 November 2012 - 11:30 PM
For as long as I can remember moving through my mom's house was a path through the piles. It has gotten better sometimes and worse others. More often worse than better. My grandmother is the same (maybe a little neater stacked and stored), but still cluttered. I want to do better, but I have problems. I look at an item and try and decide where it belongs. I know I am obsessing on the wrong things, but I don't know how not. Things like when I try to clean first I need to clean the ceiling because dust will fall down on what is below and so on. By the time I've done that and scrubbed the walls I have no time for the next thing. By the time I have time to try working on something again the dust is back and it becomes that I feel I'm getting nowhere and if I ignore it then I don't have to deal with it. I feel tired and depressed. I don't know where to put things. There is just so much and I feel so overwhelmed.
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