Wow Samantha, 40 boxes! That's amazing. I'd be happy just to have gotten them in the front door. But filled and back out again...that's nothing short of a miracle in my book.

I'm new to this site and see you haven't checked in for awhile. I've been so encouraged by your progress and hope you will continue to give updates. I'm very touched by the support and encouraging words for you from Tillie and Tatoulia...you all offer a light at the end of the tunnel!

Just checking in to see how yesterday went. Write when you can.

Be sure to rest up and take care of yourself. Yay on saying goodbye to the microwave. Sometimes a good shower and watching a movie in Netflix helps!

Thank you so much. Dropped microwave off to Goodwill. Low energy today. I appreciate your help.

40 boxes!!!!! Hip hip hooray!

I'm grateful you have help coming! You know if we were close in geography I would swoop on over! I am supporting you from afar!

I will write more later and am not ignoring the painful subjects you raised. Let me say this for now, I think we cheat ourselves out of grieving by saying that others have it much worse. That's true, but you still deserve to grieve. It's not a contest on how sh&&$@!tty our lives are, and the one with the sh@ttiest wins. It's perfectly acceptable to grieve and cry and vent and everything else. We just need to keep it in check by putting it in perspective and by not wallowing.

Take care of yourself. Hydrate and eat well. I suggest stocking up on some beverages before your friend comes over. Nothing like a nice cool gingerale or water or whatever to revive during an arduous process.

THANK YOU for posting. And orient to the task--working on place--not the result (house beautiful). You are doing it and you are doing a great job.

Thanks for your suggestion Tatoulia it has helped. I removed 40+ boxes to the recycle between yesterday and this morning but it is so difficult for me to feel my accomplishments because I'm so busy looking at what needs to be done. Last night the homeowner called to say that the bank is coming on Friday to assess the property. I am consumed with fear. I am ashamed, embarrassed and discouraged although he knows what things look like here. I am distraught over the disintegration of the relationship with my only sibling and cannot go to my father's funeral. I want to just disappear. Leave all of this behind and start all over somewhere else but know this is my responsibility and not for anyone else to be deal with. I am working on feeling more gratitude because I know that what I'm going through is minuscule to what others face that may be homeless, hungry and more. I prayed for help and just got a call from a friend who said she would come over tomorrow and help me. So I am feeling this gratitude. Thanks all for being here. So grateful.

Samantha, I know the feeling--he's a little trick I use--instead of seeing what I have to do, I look at what I've done. So, three bags to recycling and one to garbage--WOW. Two bags to Salvation Army and two to garbage-Hurrah! See how that works? Focus on your progress. It worked for me and helped chase away the feeling that i was working to the point of exhaustion but nothing to show for it. You do have something to show for it--the bags stacked up waiting for the trash truck.

Let me know if you try this suggestion and if it works for you. It sure helped me out many, many times.


The visit with friend went very well. My house looked really pretty. We can do this! A year ago I felt like I'd abused the privilege of owning stuff. Now, I've actually had someone over for a beverage before going out to dinner. Unbelievable progress--yet something I was able to do 15 years ago, I plan to forge ahead and make this my "new normal".

Keep me posted. Be sure to take time to take care of yourself, I know you are grieving. Do what you need to do. And let us know how you are!

Hi Tatoulia. How did things go with friend? I am steadily getting rid of old papers, filing important papers but feel as though I'm not making a dent even though I'm lugging bags and bags out to recycle bin. Exhausted and emotional by family issues but have good friends that are being supportive. So many fears, doubts and insecurities. How will I get all of this stuff cleared out of here? Somewhat discouraged today and want to pack a bag and disappear. Oh. happy Mothers' Day. Thanks for being here.

Oh Samantha, I am so sorry to hear that. Please accept my sympathy. Post when you can. We will be here.

Thank you Tillie.

My sincerest condolences Samantha (((HUGS)))

Hi Tatoulia. Father passed away yesterday, going through many emotions so much stress dealing with family issues but managed to throw away loads of plastic containers. Today started on dishes in kitchen sink unable to finish. I will get started again in a few. Thanks for understanding and encouragement.

Hi Samantha, just checking in. It is a nice feeling to wake up to a clean kitchen sink so let me know if you've been able to start on kitchen today. One thing you should know: you can post progress, lack of progress, backsliding, all of it here. Dont feel you can only post progress and don't feel like a failure if you don't do what you said you would. We are just like you,

I have to clean my house today. A friend who is visiting from overseas said she'd drop by today and I couldn't come up with an excuse. My house is filthy but I'm chipping away at it. Bedroom is looking good and the "library" (what I call my den) is now clean. Living room is still a scene and bathroom is gross, I'm trying to keep calm. I realize, as I clean today, that I still own too much stuff. I got rid of loads and loads and loads of stuff and I still own too much. I need to work on this but for now I'm trying not to let that realization paralyze me, I need to clean my bathroom and not sit here and fret.

Let me know what's up!

Hi Tatoulia. Thanks so much for your response. I wrote to you earlier but I it kept saying I needed to correct the image so I don't know if you got it. Today was a productive day although I didn't accomplish a huge amount. Guess I will need to be appreciative of any progress at all. Want to keep up the momentum. So glad that you and others are here which encourages me to keep going. I'm less discouraged today and am taking baby steps but steps nonetheless. Tackling the kitchen tomorrow. Will let others know how I did. Thank you.

Hi Samantha! Welcome! I know when I get my garbage and recyclables out, I feel a lot better. Actually when I do anything, I feel a lot better. So as you go through this, when the inevitable frustration sets in, you will feel better if you can put on some music and just Start.

I did a massive de-hoarding last summer and beyond. But still my house is a mess. I keep my bedroom nice, small blessing, but the living room is terrible and the bathroom needs to be cleaned.

So, I will read a few posts here, put some music on, and just Start. It's amazing that it only takes ten minutes to empty dishwasher and fill it with the dishes in the sink. But a full day to lament the dishes in the sink. Sometimes it's helpful to force yourself to do something in a specific time period.

We are here!

Hi Samantha :)

We would be happy to try answering any questions you may have.
Here, we start with filling a bag with any obvious trash and getting it out to the can/dumpster.
This frees up some space for working in and is a fast way to get a great feeling of having accomplished something very positive.

A really good book to read is
"Buried In Treasures".
This helps with the thinking behind and the holding on to too many possessions. :)

Your response was so encouraging. I am doing what you suggest and it is working. I am trying to keep all my fears in the day until they lessen and hopefully go away. I always thought that I couldn't be a hoarder since...well never mind because what I was about to do was compare and not identify. I belong here. I have many of the fears, doubts and insecurities of people here and I'm glad to have found all of you. Thank you for your help.

Welcome Samantha :)

You have nothing to fear here from us.
Moving in a few months just might be the motivation you need.
First thing I would ask you to do is to give up shopping/buying anything for one month, except food and toilet paper, if you need it.
So hard to get things under control when there is always more coming in every week.
Clearing up a little space is a great start.
One little space here and another one over there will start to add up and soon you will have a whole room cleared.
Don't look at the whole project/home at once, you will get discouraged.
Look only at small do-able little areas and take pride in getting them cleared, one little area at a time.

:)

Hello. This is my first time here and I found you by looking online for help for hoarding. Never occurred to me before today to look online. I look around my apartment and feel such sadness. How did things get to this place. I am always so well put together but my place is filled with clothes, clothes, clothes and I am constantly buying more. I have such fear of anyone coming to my home. There are friends I've known for 20 years or more that have never been to my home. I live out of state from my family and most have not been allowed to visit because my fear was I would be judged by them. I constantly fear the owner coming in seeing all the clutter and asking me to leave. I feel so discouraged when I start clearing up a little space and it doesn't appear that anything has been done. I'm contemplating moving in a few months and feel overwhelmed just getting started. If you're reading this thank you and if you feel compelled to answer I will be most grateful.