Well, additional update is that my life has gotten extra busy - my dsil has a temporary job, and my dd1 has a potential job for her company that would involve her living out of state during the week.  She is hoping that if the job comes through it won’t be until after dsil job ends in mid October.  Currently I am providing extra child care.  Last week was hard.  This week Bean is in school all week and his afterschool program starts tomorrow.  Buddy starts a childcare/preschool program three days a week, so I will have Buddy alone and just on m/f.  This will continue after I start working  tu/w/th in September.

Birdy was born a month early, so they are watching the twins very closely.  We hope they stay in until December, but if they are born early or ddil gets put on bed rest, I will have to go out to stay with them before that.  My farm sitter is having a baby in September and cannot manage my farm for weeks in the winter, so I need to start getting rid of animals.  This is really hard.

so, tired. stressed.  I am finally officially through menopause, which seems to be helping my sleep issues and energy levels a little, but not my weight.

Back to your coffee table - can you put all of the gifts in your suitcase, since they will have to fit there when you travel?  And do you still use your cookbooks?  Also, where were they before they were on your coffee table?  What else is on the table?

I have not bought any Legos today (but I have some that haven’t shipped yet)

Subc!!!!!!!   And everyone else!

thank you for the newsy update!  I did not read through the posts so I needed this!

Right now I will be tough love but know that I’m talking to myself as well.

STOP with the legos. I’m not sure I’m following the bag concept but basically you are enjoying the gamble/win aspect and then justifying the purchase later by saying it relaxes you. I’m telling myself that, too. I don’t know how I stumbled across this particular YouTube genre but there are these things where you buy five bracelet packets where they open up the packet live and if there’s a token, you get an extra bracelet packet.  People can end up with 20 or more bracelets and then I think, then what.  Seriously no one needs that many bracelets.  It’s the payoff of the gamble/the payoff of the win. When eBay first started I’d make myself sick trying to win a bid. I have no desire to buy the bracelets but I enjoy the chats and it’s not the worst way to pass an evening but my God there must be a better way.

so my dear, cut it out with the legos. You have enough to stay calm for the next five years.

I’ve joined a nice church overseas and despite being tiny, it holds services on line.  Sundays at 5:30 PM, which is 11:30 AM my time.  So I’ll be joining in an hour. It’s good to see everyone and I’m learning a lot and feel peaceful.  I’ll be there in person in December.

I’ve been buying stuff as gifts to take overseas in December.  Stuff from the World Cup and the Tall Ships, both of which brought great joy to Boston.  One of our friends is married to a Scotsman, so I’ve got some stuff for him. He was going to come to the US for a game but something went wrong and he did not.  I’m storing the gifts in my suitcase but there are admittedly a few on the coffee table.

im sick of living like this SubC. I still have my house cleaners every week. They are extremely kind to me but I have the most beautiful coffee table and I never get to see it because it’s a giant pile.

I need you to challenge me to clean it off and I need you to challenge me to find a home for my cookbooks. I got a new fridge earlier this summer and it’s smaller and ny cookbooks don’t fit on top.

ready for the challenge so please be firm and  hold me accountable.

yay for all the grandkids!

Subc!!!!!!!   And everyone else!

thank you for the newsy update!  I did not read through the posts so I needed this!

Right now I will be tough love but know that I’m talking to myself as well.

STOP with the legos. I’m not sure I’m following the bag concept but basically you are enjoying the gamble/win aspect and then justifying the purchase later by saying it relaxes you. I’m telling myself that, too. I don’t know how I stumbled across this particular YouTube genre but there are these things where you buy five bracelet packets where they open up the packet live and if there’s a token, you get an extra bracelet packet.  People can end up with 20 or more bracelets and then I think, then what.  Seriously no one needs that many bracelets.  It’s the payoff of the gamble/the payoff of the win. When eBay first started I’d make myself sick trying to win a bid. I have no desire to buy the bracelets but I enjoy the chats and it’s not the worst way to pass an evening but my God there must be a better way.

so my dear, cut it out with the legos. You have enough to stay calm for the next five years.

I’ve joined a nice church overseas and despite being tiny, it holds services on line.  Sundays at 5:30 PM, which is 11:30 AM my time.  So I’ll be joining in an hour. It’s good to see everyone and I’m learning a lot and feel peaceful.  I’ll be there in person in December.

I’ve been buying stuff as gifts to take overseas in December.  Stuff from the World Cup and the Tall Ships, both of which brought great joy to Boston.  One of our friends is married to a Scotsman, so I’ve got some stuff for him. He was going to come to the US for a game but something went wrong and he did not.  I’m storing the gifts in my suitcase but there are admittedly a few on the coffee table.

im sick of living like this SubC. I still have my house cleaners every week. They are extremely kind to me but I have the most beautiful coffee table and I never get to see it because it’s a giant pile.

I need you to challenge me to clean it off and I need you to challenge me to find a home for my cookbooks. I got a new fridge earlier this summer and it’s smaller and ny cookbooks don’t fit on top.

ready for the challenge so please be firm and  hold me accountable.

yay for all the grandkids!

Tatoulia!

I am so happy to see you!  Please stay!  I need help!

I’ve been buying Legos.  And books.  The recycling has piled up, And dd2 is coming to visit at the beginning of October and bringing her significant other (she just moved in with him, they got a pet together) who is going to meet me AND see my house for the first time.

Bean is 6.  Buddy is almost 2, Birdy will be 3 at the end of the year, and the twins are due at the beginning of December (the twins are Birdy’s sisters.  I don’t know how much you have read)

I’m glad mom’s cat is still doing well.

don’t cheat when you clean off the coffee table - lol!  What is on it?  Does it have homes?

I still do not have homes for all of my stuff, but most of the problems are in the basement and one closet.  Right now there are Legos everywhere though.  And more books than shelf space.  I brought a shelf home from school this week (it was getting thrown out) but can’t figure out where to put it.  It was originally mine, then I took it to school, then I traded it to another teacher, then she put it out in the hall and no one wanted it.  No one from school transports donations anymore, so everything in the halls gets taken to the dumpster before the open house.  I have a big bag of washed (by me) stuffed animals and two chairs that I rescued and need to take with my donations very soon.  I was going to go today, but Dh made plans for us with friends.

i know  I’ve been buying the Legos because I am exhausted and stressed and they are not physically demanding and let me switch my mind off for a while - like a puzzle, but more fun for me.  Also, I’ve been buying bulk boxes from charities online - I set a really low per pound limit on myself, but sometimes I cheat if I see something in the box I really want.  I get a dopamine hit from winning, and another one when the box is delivered, and then I have a really good time searching through the box for “treasures” and trying to assemble partial sets that I find.  This week I found all the pieces for the small Eiffel Tower.  I’ve discovered that if you have the piece with the license plate sticker you can look up the instructions for the car, and Bean now has three cool LEGO race cars I managed to assemble.  But I have too many Legos now.  I know because I have started hoping that the boxes will come when Dh isn’t home, and if they do, I hide them.

i have gained weight back too.  It is all the stress - the Legos and the books and the bad eating choices, and Dh tries to support me, but he wants to move too fast and loses patience.  He is not a person who can be proud of me for eating and an apple instead of a cookie thirty or forty times until I have a new habit.  He does want to help.  The thing we are doing with friends today is a “hike” suggested by Dh.  But then they added “and get lunch” so there is another challenge in my day.  And I put hike in quotes, because we are only doing two miles, flat, and slowly because one friend has a bad knee.  And we are driving.  So two hours sitting in a car, plus a restaurant lunch, for a two mile walk.  If I actually spent that 4 hours cleaning my house and going up and down stairs and out to the barn in the process, it might be better for both my fitness and mental state.

i really hope you are going to come back and tell me about your coffee table and help me find better coping mechanisms, because i really do not want to reheard my house and i do not want to be embarrassed when dd2 brings her s.o.

Haha cleaning off my coffee table.

Hi everyone!   Subc I randomly came back tonight.  I don’t know when I last posted!  Hope I’m still welcome.

clutter creep has definitely set in but I’ve been keeping up with linens and stuff like that.  Keeping those to a minimum and only keeping those that I use and like.  I have a bag for the cat shelter and I’ll go tomorrow.

I need help cheating off my coffee table. It’s a giant mess right now.  Dining table has remained empty so that’s good. It’s the coffee table.

I honestly don’t know when I last posted. My mother died in Dec 2023 and I have successfully rehomed her things, including her wedding china.  My cat died in early 2023 but I adopted a 16 yo cat same weekend.  That cat had passed on but we had nearly three years together.  I have mom’s cat.  She’s doing great.

my significant other is still overseas. I’ll see him in December when I travel to Europe.

I love you all so much. Subc how old are the grandkids now?

Good morning,

another week down.

made it through what I hope will be the hardest week with the boys.  Very tired, but we had a lot of fun and Bean likes school.  Buddy and I had a really good time focusing on just what he wanted to do yesterday and I wore him out - he took a long nap.

I started preparing my room for classes on Wednesday - going in to do more work today.  I have saved some things that the building manager was going to put in the dumpster, but they may be going straight to the thrift store, so I’m not counting yet.

if all goes well this week I get Wednesday and Thursday off.

Good morning.

i have made it through another week.

i bought more books and Legos.  I broke a bowl. dh made a work decision that will push his retirement off for two years, but he can work from home and is cleaning out his home office space. I lost two pounds.  Ddil’s doctor says the twins will come no later than the second week of December. I have done no pottery or or gardening all week - I basically dropped out of my pottery class, but I did do two social things this week - Bean’s birthday party and two hours at a friend’s house. (The friend is a new old friend who I am trying to reconnect with after years)

i had the boys three days this past week And I will have one or both of them four plus half of Wednesday the coming week.  Their mom has to travel, dad has started working, and Bean starts school Wednesday.  I have to drive the hour to his house by 6:30 to get him to school.  Hopefully this will be the hardest week for a while.  Also, hopefully he will love school, because this is a lot of stress.

dishes and laundry aren’t too bad.  I’m taking one day at a time and only planning a couple of weeks ahead.  Buddy’s day program (morning preschool with daycare) is on the horizon and so is my job.

i miss everyone.

Good morning.

the plan changed.

i did not exercise.

cory says he will work on the spam.

I won’t add your name, but thank you for coming back and letting me know you are ok!

I am not making very much progress.  I miss my support group!  In fact, I ordered a big lot of toys for the playroom that is probably going to put me back a bin.  I seem to be plunging back into the early years of children in the home where everything accumulates and you just try to keep your head above water, with no time for projects.  I remember telling a friend years ago that once everything is on the floor, it doesn’t really get worse.

i have a mountain of recycling in the basement that needs to be sorted and carted off.  The new pottery studio is on hold, so I am not motivated to work toward that either.

so much has happened this year, and it just seems to continue. At the moment there is so much uncertainty.  Dh has some decisions to make and he asked me “what do you want our life to look like in five years.” I just said “you’re kidding, right?”  I can’t picture January.  I can’t even picture September clearly.  Whatever happens will be ok, but lately, If I’m not dealing with someone’s immediate need, I just was to scroll online, play with my Legos, or read - pure escapism.

the boys did help me dig potatoes yesterday, and I have a lot of eggs still, so my big project goal for tomorrow is potato salad.  It’s also my last day to finish work for the class I’m taking, and I have to pick up some things in town.  But I’m having trouble finding energy for the pottery.

i am handing off my grandsons at the fitness center today, so hopefully i will get some exercise.  Tomorrow I will either feel better, or more tired……

Hey SubC,

It's me C-M.* I haven't been posting but I've been following you gals just to make sure you're okay. My reasons for not posting are some personal changes in what I feel comfortable sharing online these days overall, and concerns regarding cybersecurity issues in the age of AI. It is downright creepy what AI can find even when it is posted under usernames and I checked and it can not only find stuff from one site, it can detect if the same person is posting online in different websites and contexts. It does this by analyzing writing style via algorithms. I quote, from the AI summary on Chrome:

Yes, AI can analyze your writing style across different websites. This process is called stylometry. AI models read your word choices, punctuation, and sentence length to build a unique profile. They can match this profile to spot the same person on different sites, even if you use different names.

I also noticed this website and the message board were revamped recently. I'd hoped (whether I chose to resume participation myself or not) that it would be restructured to include actual secure username-based logins and consistent, strict moderation to elimimate spam and other nonsense. Clearly, if one looks at the board, it is obvious that spammers have struck worse than ever and that little is being done about it. I don't understand the choice to keep the old unregulated structure in 2026. Maybe Cory has a reason but it's not the choice I would make.

Hope this all doesn't sound too paranoid, but I believe it's better to be safe than sorry. I actually want to do some (anonymous) content creation in future, which is why I feel it imperative to scrub my current history in several places, so that I can start fresh and be proactive re privacy/identity going forward.

Lila, sadly, is probably not coming back, based on her response to the thread below. I didn't know if you'd caught it. Lila, if you see this, be blessed and happy. <3

https://hoardingcleanup.com/message-board/the-daily-chat/website-update/

SubC, I feel bad for you and anyone else wanting to have a space like you liked having previously. Have you checked out the possibility of establishing a Discord server? It's too bad the old-school message boards with logins and usernames seem to have gone the way of the dinosaurs. Reddit has several subreddits on decluttering topics but they would be more anonymous and fleeting; you wouldn't have the same camaraderie and long-term bond.

In any case, I hope you are well. I was happy to hear about your twin granddaughters to come and will pray for the health of them and the family. And good luck to all of us on our decluttering projects 🙂

Take care,

C.  M.

*I am changing the order of characters with each iteration to make it harder for AI to find. If I do post again, I'll continue to vary the handle. This is in keeping with a practice known as "poisoning the well," making it harder for AI to scrape data. I'm using a burner email to post this.

Hello!

is anybody still around?

we are home, the car is unloaded, and I have done a load of wash.  The laundry situation is better than when we walked through the door, the dish situation is worse. Also, the new things I brought home from my mom’s house are not put away.

my schedule is about to get really crazy.  I will need to guard my down time ferociously and make sure I am using it well. (Well might mean reading a book or playing with my legos.  It does not mean scrolling.)

today I need to restart my exercise program, work in the garden, clean up after vacation, do some pottery, and go to class.

i’ll get started as soon as Dh leaves for work.

From yesterday

Good morning.

it has been two weeks since anyone else posted.  I’m worried than the board is dying.

I check almost daily, but i am still on vacation.

dd1 and her family left yesterday and the rest of my kids and dgs2 leave today.  Mom and I plan to work on laundry and decluttering the rest of the weekend.  I’m not sure how productive that will be for me, since I’m sure there will be things we get rid of but also things that will go home with me.

Test

Well, turns out the ac was a very temporary fix.  I have to call a shop later and make an appointment to fix the underlying problem.  I got very hot dropping off recycling and donations yesterday, but I can add another bin to my tally.

i wasn’t able to part with all of the unwanted baby clothes, but I took the easiest ones before I changed my mind.

my grandsons are coming again today - we’re going to make ice cream.  I actually cooked the custard base last night.

little by little….    I miss CM.

And then instead I spent the day in the hot, humid home studio and I am sweaty and dehydrated and have a headache.

dh was working out there on cars and wanted company - upside, my car’s air conditioning works again.

I sorted out a huge stack of cardboard into “garden” and “recycling” and processed a bucket of reclaim clay - wedged the stuff that was on the drying board, poured out the mixer onto the drying board, and refilled the mixer to soak - so each of the basic steps it takes to process a batch. (I also have to run the mixer periodically after it soaks until the batch is the right consistency.).   I put a little bit of the garden cardboard out on the garden, but then it started raining.

and I collected two plastic grocery bags of trash as I was moving around the studio.

this evening we are going over to Bean’s house for his family birthday party.  Dd just moved it because a conflict came up on his actual birthday.  I need to take a shower and wrap his presents.

Good morning

we had terrible storms in our area yesterday.

they hit right at rush hour.  Fortunately they were not as bad out where I live, but the area where Dd lives had horrible flooding.  She ended up stranded less than a mile from home in an elevated church parking lot.  Fortunately she had the pizza she had picked up to take home for dinner.  The boys got something else with cold pizza for dessert.

the pottery studio I belong to also flooded.  Everything loose in the outdoor firing yard washed into the parking lot and the electrical system was “affected” and required complete inspection before they can reopen.  The all day event planned today that I have been looking forward to was obviously cancelled.  It is hot, humid, and grey here, so I will try to take advantage of the unexpected free time to return to working in the basement.  A top priority is to get those unwanted baby girl clothes out.  It is so hard.

i also would like to hear from more people.  When I started this I had a house where you had to put things on the floor to use a chair.  Now I still have an overcrowded basement and messy zones with piles and some random unsorted boxes and bins, but I was able to prepare for a surprise visit from my son’s family - with a two year old, in less than 2 hours.  I think this will always be a process, but even though I still despair of getting there sometimes, I can imagine a day when I live in a normal house where I can actually find and access everything in only a few minutes.

It's hot here too, SubC. I think next year I will try to take vacation in May instead, so I can be outside more. As it is, I have to get up early to do anything outside. This morning I pulled weeds, trimmed hanging tree branches, watered plants and put the green bin out to the curb, all before 8am.

My house is so much better. I wonder if anyone reads our chatter. If so, please say hi! I would like to encourage people that you can start with a totally hoarded up house and end up a lot better. It took me 3.5 years but it was worth it. Now my living room and dining room are pretty normal looking (not magazine perfect but clean and presentable), kitchen is 90% there and my bedroom varies from 75% to 90%, depending on what I toss in there sometimes... (will fix that habit when TotsFam moves out and I have other spaces for things I am keeping).

I hope you have a good day. 🙂

It’s funny, the day and time are wrong on my posts - I always seem to be posting in the future.

I’ve spent almost my whole day just vacuuming, washing things, and running laundry. I have had to wash and dry bedspreads and blankets two and three times to get most of the dog hair off. I’m tired and feeling grumpy because I have done so much work and hav3 so little to show for it.

I need to go get my pots ready for Saturday - today is the only day I have to work on them and get them fired in time, but somehow I can’t shift gears. Also it’s so hot and humid outside I don’t even want to walk to the barn.

So I drove Birdy and his mama to pick up a rental car this afternoon.

my car AC died on the way, so I stopped twice on the way home to cool off - once at a thrift store and once for iced tea (it was very hot)

I bought some kitchen things for grandkids (kept running out of preferred cups and containers when Birdy was here) and a little art table for the basement.  I’m up ten.

i’ve run a load of dishes and two of laundry.  I have a lot of bedding to wash because of dogs and peanut butter eating boys.

tomorrow I stay home all day by myself.

So I drove Birdy and his mama to pick up a rental car this afternoon.

my car AC died on the way, so I stopped twice on the way home to cool off - once at a thrift store and once for iced tea (it was very hot)

I bought some kitchen things for grandkids (kept running out of preferred cups and containers when Birdy was here) and a little art table for the basement.  I’m up ten.

i’ve run a load of dishes and two of laundry.  I have a lot of bedding to wash because of dogs and peanut butter eating boys.

tomorrow I stay home all day by myself.

Birdy is going home this afternoon.

mixed feelings.  I know ddil will be happy to get back to her life, and he and his daddy miss each other, and I really need to invest some time in my house and projects, but I will miss him!

but - only ten days to family vacation!

Good morning!

Lila, the birthday sounds fun!  I think I would also opt out of the vacation.  Being honest alone is more of a vacation for me!

Yesterday We spent the morning with Ds before he and the dogs drove home.  Then I went to the city studio to do some work and ddil took Birdy to a ballgame and dinner with her family.  He came home very tired.  They are going to go out again this morning and for lunch.  I have planned far too many things to do while they are gone.

Tomorrow I have all three grandsons here all day and we might find out if Birdy can go home.

SubC, it sounds so busy at your house, and so familiar! Dog hair, kids, and too much food for the fridge, lol. I hope you had an awesome holiday with the kids! Your new class parameters sound so much better for you. I really hope you have an enjoyable year!

hi messi! How you doing?

We had a big birthday celebration here. My TotsDad made a cake and ordered Indian food, and two other sons and their wife/girlfriend came, and Tot's cousin who is 6 came. So it was a full, loud, happy house with kids running everywhere laughing. It was great.

I have been cleaning my living room all week and moved all the furniture, vacuumed under it and everywhere, brushed the dogs a few times, dusted most things and used furniture polish, even cleaned the windows. Then I had to stash and dash when everyone was coming for dinner, but it was quick and Wow, it looks like no hoarder house in the main living areas! DDIL brought me gorgeous flowers, so they are on the table and it is very peaceful (everyone went out for the day).

Next week TotsFam is all going on vacation. I was invited but decided it would be better for me to stay home (alone! in the silence! with the dogs!) so I am looking forward to doing whatever I want, taking naps if I want, reading, being at peace. It is great. (I am still on vacation from work).

I have kept up the daily tally as well. Hope to get some mroe done!

Catch you later. I wonder how Road and her son are.

Good morning!

Ds is flying back today (he bought a round trip ticket) but he is not taking his family h9me tomorrow, only his dogs.  The water situation is still uncertain.  Hopefully the second test will come back safe and ddil and Birdy will fly home midweek.  I am enjoying having them here, but ddil really wants her life back.  And Birdy is missing swim classes and other fun summer activities he was signed up for.

ds has been trying to make it worthwhile by focusing all of his extra time on projects around the house he hasn’t been able to get  to.  He sent her a picture of the finally completed stairway two days ago.  It has been functional but not cosmetically finished for over two years.

i no longer remember what I planned to do with my July.  I’ve pretty much just been hanging out with Birdy and trying (with mixed success) to do yoga every day and work on pottery during nap.  House is still falling behind, but not too fast.

ddil is planning to take Birdy to meet some of her family for an activity tomorrow afternoon and I am going to the city studio to work on pieces for an all day club event next Saturday.  Then on Monday she and Birdy are spending most of the day with them.

ds is taking home a few more small things from my house (I think)

Good morning!

Lila, I have been trying to not be gone, but frequently the post button doesn’t work.  When it persists, I email Cory.  I have learned to copy my post before I try to submit it.

i woke up with a migraine this morning and have done nothing but take medicine and sip coffee.  It is a bit better, but I think I will go take more meds - I start with a half dose because that is usually enough.

yesterday we had a very busy day with  Buddy and Birdy, and Birdy and his mom are still asleep.  The house is a wreck!

today we are just staying home with Birdy, so I will try to clean it up a little.  So far we think daddy is flying back on Saturday and taking everyone home on Sunday.  But it will depend on the water test.

SubC! messi! Yay! So glad you are back. I am just so excited I had to post. I will read and catch up and hope to share more!

Good evening!

post from this morning:

ds flew home yesterday to work all week - water won’t be approved until at least Thursday and a friend offered him the use of his apartment.  Ddil, Birdy, and the dogs are staying here and he will fly back to get them on Saturday.

dd has been out with her boys for part of every day and made dinner twice.

i am falling behind on laundry, the counter, and dishes, but very slowly, and somehow, the more meals everyone eats here, the more full my refrigerator gets.  There is absolutely no more room.  Today’s menu is “leftovers”.  We are managing to do a little vacuuming, but the house is covered in dog hair and will need a serious cleaning when everyone leaves.  Lila - it is much harder with kids here!

today no one is coming over.  Dh is working from home, ddil is going to go out and run an errand, and i will have a quiet day with just Birdy at home.

ddil and I FaceTimed dd2 and sorted through the four bins of saved girl clothes.  Apparently tastes have changed, buttons are dangerous, and thrift stores are abundant.  Ddil is taking one grocery bag of clothes (to be fair she already has a lot of unisex clothes - “unisex” being a broad category since Birdy’s favorite color is pink). Dd2 has one bin to be saved in case she has a girl, and the rest can go.  I will deal with the “go” ones later.  I stacked them in a corner of the basement.

having all the boys here is helping a little to focus me differently on what needs to be in my spaces and how they are used.  Not that I have time to adjust anything!  Next summer there will be five grandchildren!  Two will be crawling!

Sorry about the frustration everyone. The old site was no longer able able to be sustained so we had to move it to a new site and re-create everything. That’s the reason the website completely changed if you notice any other issues, please continue to email me so we can make it perfect

Testing the reply functionality