Dear Katz,

I hope you're still coming to the message board. I'm new here myself. Read your post and I feel your pain. This disorder is extremely isolating, both physically and mentally.

As cliché as it sounds, recognizing you have a problem and wanting to change is the first step. Give yourself credit for that. Joining this message board is also something for which you should give yourself credit.

I read as much as I can about the disorder to try to understand how my mind -- the mind of a compulsive hoarder -- operates. Trying to change the dysfunctional thinking is not easy. I get incredibly frustrated with myself for knowing what I need to do, yet feeling almost powerless to do it.

It feels as if I'm in a constant battle with my own mind. I'm constantly trying to come up with ways to "trick" my mind into doing what it isn't inclined to do.

I started making some videos in an effort to help myself and maybe even others. If you feel up to checking them out, here are the links:

You're Not Alone https://youtu.be/HPdevfhF5X0
Start With Your Kitchen Sink https://youtu.be/vq5qUybicWY

Sending you strength.

Oops, I posted my previous reply under Katz's name somehow - my apologies!

Also, as a fellow panic attack sufferer, I would suggest getting help, possibly including meds, for your anxiety if you haven't already. You don't have to mention about your house situation at first. Just say you're stressed from work or something. We who have the hoarding issue most likely have at least one underlying anxiety, depression, ADD/OCD, grief, or similar type of thing that needs to be addressed. The clutter keeps us feeling that we can't reach out because we're scared that if we make friends we might have to let them see our house, but we don't. Wishing you all the best. We know how it feels but we're all going to fight it and you can too, and we're rooting for you! 🙂

Another way to get started is to set a timer for only 5 minutes and tell yourself that you only have to do something for just 5 minutes.

Working for a small amount of time or filling one small bag with trash is the best way to start when we are too overwhelmed.
Don't look at the hole house and think about everything needing to get done.
Focus only on that one small task.

I can totally relate! Just start chipping away at it and give yourself lots of praise, OUTLOUD, and it WILL get better! Once you see some results you will start to feel better. It can even become a joy to see results! The book 'Buried In Treasures'is very helpful! 😀

You've found a good place to start. Read as much of the boards here as you can. Start in one place. For instance, take a plastic grocery bag and pick up anything that is clearly garbage until you fill the bag. Then the bag goes to the outdoor garbage. Read often, post often. You are not alone.